Explore every episode of the podcast BeThatHealingGirl Podcast
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Why You Overthink When Nothing is Wrong in the Relationship | 03 Feb 2026 | 00:16:18 | |
If things feel safe in person but the moment you’re apart your brain goes into panic mode… this is the episode to save, replay, and send to your bestie. In this episode I share: ✨ Why your brain goes into “red alert” even when there’s no actual danger ✨ What overthinking is really trying to protect you from ✨ How anxious attachment can show up as avoidant behavior ✨ The sneaky ways your anxiety becomes a compulsion (yes, like gambling) ✨ What finally helped me stop trying to micromanage my relationship This one’s personal... I also share how the same overthinking loop showed up in planning my trip to the Philippines (including seeing my dad for the first time in years)… and what finally helped me feel safe enough to stop trying to figure it all out. And if you feel like you logically know there’s no threat but your body still freaks out? You're not broken. You're running an old system. Inside The Healing Girl Gang, we don’t just talk about the theory, we practice the new pattern. 🎧 So if you’re tired of always waiting for the other shoe to drop, this is your sign to listen. 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| I Didn’t Look at the Facts, and My Relationship Paid the Price | 28 Jan 2026 | 00:18:57 | |
In today’s episode, I’m getting real about the moment I didn’t look at the facts and how my relationship paid the price. If you’re an overthinker, a scenario-maker, a “what if” queen, or someone who keeps searching for problems when there are none… this episode is for you. Because here’s the hard truth: 👉 Overthinking in relationships isn’t emotional intelligence. 👉 It’s avoidance. 👉 And it quietly pushes safe, loving partners away. If you’ve ever wondered, “Wait… am I the drama?” (lovingly), you’re in the right place. In this episode we talk about: ✨ Why anxious attachment makes you question healthy relationships ✨ How self-sabotage shows up as “being logical” or “being cautious” ✨ The difference between facts vs. stories your anxiety creates ✨ Why safe love can feel boring, uncomfortable, or “wrong” at first ✨ How trying to control conversations and outcomes kills intimacy ✨ What it actually takes to stop pushing good people away
I also share a personal update after my hysterectomy recovery, how this same self-sabotage pattern showed up in my health journey, and why anxious attachment isn’t just about dating... it’s about how we avoid deeper emotional truth in every area of life. If you’re a high-achieving woman who is crushing it in your career but spiraling in your relationship… I see you. You are not broken. You’re just running an outdated emotional system. 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How to Stop Trying So Hard Because You’re Scared They’ll Stop Loving You | 20 Jan 2026 | 00:17:27 | |
Welcome back to the Be That Healing Girl podcast! 🧠💘 Today’s episode is for the girlies who are exhausted from being the emotional project manager of their relationship. You know the one: the planner, the fixer, the emotional laborer, the one Googling “how to stop being anxious but still be lovable.” If your brain tells you, “If I stop trying, nothing will happen,” and you're scared your relationship will crumble unless you give 200% every second… this episode will hit. hard. 👀 We’re talking: - The lie anxious attachment tells you about effort = love - How overfunctioning is killing your vibe and your connection - What it actually means to feel safe and loved without working overtime - And why letting your partner choose you requires you to chill (even if it makes you twitchy) Plus... an update from my hysterectomy recovery era and how Head Nurse Craig is thriving, and I am deeply humbled and deeply moisturized. 🎧 And don’t forget: if you’re tired of the spiral, the resentment, and the fake chill girl act, the Healing Girl Gang is where we turn information into actual transformation. It’s not just “awareness,” babe. It’s reps, it’s nervous system work, it’s receipts. Come do the work and feel good doing it! 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| A Simple Way to Slow Down an Overthinking Spiral in the Moment | 13 Jan 2026 | 00:06:12 | |
If your brain goes from 0 to 100 the second something feels “off” ... if you replay conversations, wait for texts, or feel that frantic “I have to fix this” energy... this episode is for you! In today's podcast I’m walking you through a simple, science‑backed breathing tool you can use right now to slow down an anxious spiral and bring your nervous system back online. This is the tool I personally use when: • I feel the urge to check my phone • My thoughts start racing • My body feels buzzy, panicky, or unsafe • My anxious attachment is running the show Inside this episode, you’ll learn: ✨ Why anxiety and anxious attachment thrive on speed ✨ What a “psychological sigh” is and how it calms your nervous system ✨ A step‑by‑step breathing technique to use when you’re spiraling ✨ The difference between calming a symptom vs. rewiring the system And I’m also going to be real with you: This tool will slow the spiral, but it won’t heal anxious attachment by itself. That happens when you change the system your nervous system is running on. That’s exactly what we do inside Healing Girl Gang through reps, structure, and real‑life nervous system retraining, not just mindset hacks. And just know: You are not broken. You are not too much. Your nervous system learned a pattern... and it can learn a new one.
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Why You Get More Anxious the More You Focus on Your Relationship | 06 Jan 2026 | 00:18:01 | |
If you’ve ever said *“I’m gonna be the BEST partner ever and do all the right things”… and then wondered why you still feel anxious, on edge, or like you're constantly spiraling... this episode is for you. Today, I’m breaking down why over-focusing on your relationship is actually making you feel less secure, more anxious, and totally disconnected from yourself. Inside this episode, we dive into: 💔 The sneaky anxious attachment loop that leads to emotional burnout 🔁 Why logic alone won’t soothe your nervous system 🧠 How hyper-focusing on your partner creates fragility in your relationship 📱 The role your phone (yep!) plays in your spirals 🌱 What “watering your own garden” actually looks like when you have anxious tendencies Plus, I share a personal story about going to the movies alone (and loving it!) something old-me would never have done, and why this tiny moment marked a huge healing milestone. This episode is part love letter, part wake-up call and it’s the kind of grounded nervous system reframe I wish I had years ago. If you’re an anxious achiever, a closeted overfunctioner, or a recovering people-pleaser who’s tired of trying to “fix” your relationship by fixing yourself... listen to this one all the way through. There’s no shame here, just clarity, tools, and space to breathe again. 👇 Let me know in the comments if this hit home, and say “girlgang” if you’re ready to rewire this pattern with me inside The Healing Girl Gang.
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| 3 Anxious Attachment Habits That Ruin Your Relationships Over Time | 30 Dec 2025 | 00:19:40 | |
In this episode we’re breaking down the 3 most common (but sneaky) anxious attachment habits that slowly destroy connection over time... even in loving relationships! If you: - Feel like you’re too much or never enough - Constantly overanalyze texts, tone, or timing - Chase closeness, but end up feeling even more alone… This episode is your wake-up call and your path to healing!
We’ll dive into: 💔 The hidden habits rooted in fear of abandonment 🧠 Why “logic” won’t save you from spiraling 💡 What to do instead to create security, closeness, and calm
Whether you’re currently in a relationship or just trying to break old patterns before your next one, this is a must-listen! 🎧 Save it, share it, and come back when you need the reminder. P.s. If you're new here, this is exactly the kind of deep nervous system work we do inside of my community, the Healing Girl Gang - because healing anxious attachment doesn’t just change your relationships… it changes you. Let me know which habit resonated most in the comments 💬👇
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| The Fastest Way To Calm An Overthinking Spiral | 23 Dec 2025 | 00:07:18 | |
If your thoughts are spiraling… If you’re checking your phone again… If your brain won’t slow down and it feels like your nervous system is in overdrive… This episode is your quick reset. 🤍 In today’s episode I’m walking you through the fastest and most effective tool I use to calm an anxious spiral (especially when I don’t have the luxury of sitting in it). This isn’t a long list of coping strategies. It’s one tool. One moment. One practice. To bring you back to yourself. We’ll cover: ✨ How to disrupt an anxious overthinking loop in real time ✨ Why your chest breath might be making things worse ✨ The underrated ancient practice that resets your nervous system ✨ How to be present when you feel totally out of control If your texts are open, your heart is pounding, and you’re stuck refreshing their story or waiting for a reply… you’re not alone! I’ve been there. This is exactly the kind of moment where this tool matters most. 🎧 Save this episode. Come back to it. Share it with a friend who spirals too. And if you’re listening while I’m recovering from surgery (yep, hysterectomy time), send some love my way. I’ll take all the healing vibes you’ve got. 💌 As always, this is the kind of real, grounded, nervous system support we do inside the Healing Girl Gang. You are so not alone.
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How To Stay Grounded When Their Mood or Distance Triggers Your Anxiety | 16 Dec 2025 | 00:19:36 | |
In today’s episode I’m breaking down why your nervous system reacts so intensely to your partner’s mood, distance, or emotional shifts... and more importantly, how to stay grounded instead of spiraling. This one is especially for my high‑achieving, high‑functioning girlies who are crushing it at work… but feel like they’re one unread message away from losing their peace in love. We’re talking about: ✨ Why “the vibes feel off” can completely derail your nervous system ✨ The difference between reacting from fear vs responding from regulation ✨ Why reassurance only works temporarily (and what actually creates safety) ✨ How anxious attachment keeps you stuck trying to outthink or outwork your emotions ✨ The nervous system mistake high achievers make in relationships ✨ How to stay grounded (even when there is distance, silence, or uncertainty) I also share personal updates around my upcoming hysterectomy and how physical discomfort, overstimulation, and stress lower our emotional threshold - making relationship anxiety feel louder and harder to manage. (Spoiler: this isn’t about “doing more,” it’s about reducing the load.) Plus, I’m celebrating a HUGE win from a client who is navigating dating without losing herself! Proof that healing anxious attachment isn’t about perfection, it’s about recommitment. Sending you so much love, Clare 🤍
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Why Choosing Yourself Makes Your Relationship Feel More Safe | 09 Dec 2025 | 00:22:55 | |
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| What Happens When You Keep Saying "I'm Fine" When You're Really Not | 02 Dec 2025 | 00:26:08 | |
You say “I’m fine”… But your stomach’s in knots. Your voice is quieter than usual. You’re spinning in your head while trying to act chill on the outside. Sound familiar? In this episode, I’m breaking down what really happens in your body, your brain, and your relationships when you keep pretending everything’s okay… especially when it’s not! This is for the high-achieving girlies who can hold it all together at work, but are overthinking up a storm in their relationships. The ones who’ve been told they’re “too much” and the ones who’ve been praised for being “so strong” (but you’re exhausted). 🫠 Yeah, this one’s for you. We’ll talk about: ✨ What your nervous system is doing when you default to “I’m fine” ✨ Why this pattern is common for anxiously attached, people-pleasing girlies like us. ✨ How to gently shift toward safety, visibility, and actually being known 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How We Talked through Something Scary without Pushing Each Other Away | 25 Nov 2025 | 00:47:08 | |
We’ve always agreed we didn’t want kids. But suddenly, with a hysterectomy on the table… I felt wobbly. And there was this tiny part of me whispering, “If I bring up my 'unsureness'… is everything going to change?” In my past relationships, feeling unsure or changing my mind felt like a no-go zone. I could be decisive and confident everywhere else… (hello career overachiever with receipts) but inside my relationships, I was terrified that my truth would ruin everything. My inner perfectionist would jump straight into action: “Nothing to see here! I’m calm! I’m chill!” Meanwhile my body was in a full panic on the inside. And the thing I learned the hard way in those old push-pull dynamics was this: the more honest I was (with him and myself), the closer we became. Pretending never protected anything 🚨NEWS FLASH🚨 it just protects our fear. So when I finally got real with Craig about how this news made me feel… how something inside of me shifted around the idea of kids now that the option might be taken away… he didn’t freak out. He didn’t it shut down. He didn’t make it weird. He listened. He stayed with me. He held the moment instead of turning away from it. And that’s when it hit me more clearly than ever hiding never helps. It only hurts. Because the second you start censoring yourself to “keep the peace,” the peace is already gone. You can’t stay connected AND abandon yourself at the same time. Changing your mind isn’t wrong. Feeling something new isn’t wrong. Saying it out loud is what keeps you close, to your partner and to yourself. 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Why Stillness Feels Unsafe When You Have Relationship Anxiety | 18 Nov 2025 | 00:30:24 | |
This week, we’re diving deep into a topic I know hits home for so many high-achieving, anxious girlies: why stillness can feel so unsafe when you have relationship anxiety. If you ever catch yourself spiraling because the vibe feels “off,” or if a little space in communication has you convinced the whole relationship is doomed…this episode is for you. Inside this episode, I’m sharing: ✨ Why anxious attachment makes rest and stillness feel dangerous ✨ How I learned to stop overfunctioning and start receiving love (hint: it took surgery and a lot of surrender) ✨ What my explant and fibroid journeys taught me about safety, slowing down, and trusting myself ✨ The belief I had to UNLEARN in order to feel secure in my body and my relationships ✨ Why stillness is a skill (especially if you grew up in a high-pressure, achievement-driven household) ✨ How I support Healing Girl Gang members in rewiring their nervous systems for safety and self-trust ✨ A powerful listener Q&A about breaking the cycle of anxious spiraling in a secure relationship Whether you’re a career rockstar, business owner, or have a few letters behind your name (MD, RN, Esq, PhD…) — and yet still feel like a mess when someone doesn’t text back, you’re in the right place. This episode isn’t about fixing you... it’s about helping you feel safe enough to finally rest, receive, and trust yourself and your partner. If you’re ready to learn how to stop self-sabotaging and start feeling safe in love, hit play. And if you’re craving step-by-step support, come join us inside The Healing Girl Gang (where we practice these tools every single month!)
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How To Stop Over Giving And Still Feel Like A Priority | 11 Nov 2025 | 00:21:48 | |
If you're constantly planning, smoothing things over, doing the most in your relationship while low-key wondering “Why can’t they just do more??” — this episode is for you. 💥 If you're a high-achieving, hyper-capable girly who’s exhausted from holding it all together in love, this is your sign to stop performing and start receiving. Period. 👀 In this episode, I break down: • The sneaky ways anxious attachment disguises itself as “being helpful” • Why trying to “earn love through effort” is killing your intimacy • How overgiving actually blocks your partner from stepping up • What it really means to feel chosen without performing • How to stop managing your relationship like a second job • What to do instead — so you feel prioritized and adored 🎧 We also get into: • A client win that had me in my feels 🥹 (from overthinking queen to secure & supported) • A peek inside what’s working inside Healing Girl Gang • How my husband Craig reminded me (with an accent wall no less 😅) what can happen when we let go and receive This one’s part tough love, part best friend pep talk, and all soul truth. Because you don’t need to earn love. You deserve to feel it, just as you are. 👇 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG Weekly trainings, nervous system resets, and live support so you stop spiraling and start receiving: HealingGirlGang.com 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How to Feel Like a Priority Without Chasing or Being Needy | 04 Nov 2025 | 00:23:42 | |
In this episoe we’re talking about how to feel like a priority in your relationship... without slipping into overthinking, over‑analyzing every text, or feeling like you’re “asking for too much.” This episode is for you if: • You know they care about you… but you can’t always feel it • You find yourself checking for proof or reassurance • You are tired of being the one initiating, planning, or emotionally leading • Your brain does wind sprints when there’s space or distance in the relationship • You’re successful in every other area of life, but your nervous system goes ✨ feral✨ in love
Trust me, I’ve lived this. I went from anxiously attached (and chronically exhausted from managing the relationship in my head) to actually feeling chosen, safe, and prioritized in a secure partnership. And we’re unpacking exactly how that shift happens today. 💛 🌙 If you're new: I’m Clare! Relationship and attachment coach for high‑achieving women who are incredible at life… but feel wobbly in love. MDs, founders, attorneys, academics, corporate powerhouses - the girlies who “have their life together” but still spiral at the slow text response? Yep. You’re home. Love you, mean it. x Clare 🤍 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How I Accidentally Rewired My Anxious Attachment Into a Secure One | 28 Oct 2025 | 00:22:03 | |
You're not needy. You're just healing! In this episode, I’m sharing how I accidentally rewired my anxious attachment into a secure one...without forcing it, faking it, or labeling myself as “crazy.” If you’ve ever found yourself wondering: “Why am I spiraling when everything is fine?” “Why do I panic when things finally feel safe?” …or “Why can’t I just stay calm in a good relationship?” This one’s for you, bb 🫶 👇Here’s what we’re unpacking today: ✨ Why your brain freaks out when your body finally relaxes ✨ How “self-awareness” can actually be a form of over-control ✨ Why you still feel unsafe in a healthy relationship ✨ What it really means to self-regulate vs. spiral ✨ The power of experiencing consistent love (instead of just talking about it) ✨ And how your partner’s stability can rewire your nervous system—if you let it PLUS: real wins from the Healing Girl Gang! 💌 If you’re a high-achieving, emotionally intelligent woman who crushes it at work but crumbles inside a text bubble… this one’s for you. 🫶 Whether you’re newly dating, navigating relationship anxiety, or trying to trust your GOOD partner, this episode will give you the real talk, mindset shifts, and embodiment work you didn’t know you needed. 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How Being ‘Chill’ Can Push a Safe Partner Away (When You Have Relationship Anxiety) | 21 Oct 2025 | 00:21:21 | |
Welcome back BBs! In this episode, we’re diving deep into a pattern I see all the time: acting “chill” when inside, you're spiraling. You know the drill...trying so hard to come off as the "cool-low-maintenance-unbothered-girlie" so you don’t scare a good partner away… but then end up feeling lonely, disconnected, or like they’re slipping further away anyway... Yeah, we’re unpacking THAT. We’re talking: ✨ Why “being chill” is often just masked FEAR ✨ How inauthenticity actually erodes intimacy ✨ What safe partners are really craving (hint: it’s not perfection) and ✨ How to stop false-signaling and start authentically expressing what’s real for YOU! Whether you're anxiously attached, healing from abandonment, or a high-achieving, high-performing baddie who secretly (or not-so-secretly) melts down when someone doesn’t text back right away… this one’s for you. 🫶 PLUS: I’m answering a juicy Healing Girl Gang Hotline question from someone navigating a relationship blowup and trying to repair trust after spiraling. 🎧 This episode is for you if you’ve ever: Said “I’m fine” through gritted teeth Pretended to be cool with ambiguity but were low-key obsessing Felt like your partner didn’t get how much effort you were putting into not freaking out Or thought, “Ugh, maybe I’m just not meant to be in a relationship” (spoiler: you are) P.S. Inside the Healing Girl Gang community, we’re not about faking it till we make it... we’re about becoming actually unbothered from the inside out. If you're ready for deeper connection, more ease, and to stop abandoning yourself to keep someone else, you’ll love this episode!! 🦋 And If You're Ready for The Deeper Work, Checkout These Resources: 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| 3 Mistakes You're Making That Make You Second Guess a Secure Relationship | 14 Oct 2025 | 00:24:58 | |
If you're in a healthy relationship but your brain won't stop spiraling... this episode is going to hit home. In this week’s episode I’m breaking down the 3 mistakes that keep high-achieving, anxious girlies stuck in the cycle of second-guessing even the most loyal and consistent partner. If you’ve ever found yourself thinking: “Why can’t I just enjoy this person?” “Why am I prepping for the breakup when everything’s going fine?” “Am I making problems where there are none?” 👀 Then this is for YOU. I’m walking you through: ✨ The "prep for the pain" loop that keeps you emotionally exhausted ✨ Why treating your relationship like a project to manage is sabotaging your joy ✨ How mistaking surveillance for loyalty drains your connection ✨ And how to finally start trusting yourself so you can receive the love right in front of you Whether you're dating, in a long-term relationship, or navigating love after heartbreak, this episode is your permission slip to step off the spiral ride and start feeling secure for real. 🎧 Get ready to hear: → Why your anxiety won’t let you enjoy a secure partner → The real reason you keep sabotaging connection → How to stop overthinking and start building self-trust This episode is especially for my anxious attachment babes, my high-functioning overthinkers, and my career girlies who crush it at work but feel like a mess in love. This week we’re unpacking the real reason your brain confuses anxiety for intuition (and how to stop self‑sabotaging a healthy relationship!) If you’ve ever questioned your feelings, overanalyzed your partner’s every move, or convinced yourself your anxiety was a “gut feeling,” this episode is for you! 🧠 In this episode we'll be diving into: ✨ Why “the ick” is often a fear of intimacy, not intuition ✨ How anxiety shows up as false alarms in safe relationships ✨ The difference between red flags vs. self‑protection ✨ How to stop testing your partner and start trusting connection ✨ What your nervous system is actually trying to protect you from ✨ Why discomfort doesn’t mean danger—it means growth I share a personal story about how I almost lost an incredible partner because I thought my fear was “a sign.” (Spoiler: it wasn’t.) I want you to stop mistaking safety for boredom and start building the kind of secure relationship you’ve been craving! 🫶 Whether you’re newly dating, navigating relationship anxiety, or trying to trust your GOOD partner, this episode will give you the real talk, mindset shifts, and embodiment work you didn’t know you needed.
🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| What Happens When You Confuse Your Anxiety For Intuition | 07 Oct 2025 | 00:28:13 | |
This week we’re unpacking the real reason your brain confuses anxiety for intuition (and how to stop self‑sabotaging a healthy relationship!) If you’ve ever questioned your feelings, overanalyzed your partner’s every move, or convinced yourself your anxiety was a “gut feeling,” this episode is for you! 🧠 In this episode we'll be diving into: ✨ Why “the ick” is often a fear of intimacy, not intuition ✨ How anxiety shows up as false alarms in safe relationships ✨ The difference between red flags vs. self‑protection ✨ How to stop testing your partner and start trusting connection ✨ What your nervous system is actually trying to protect you from ✨ Why discomfort doesn’t mean danger—it means growth I share a personal story about how I almost lost an incredible partner because I thought my fear was “a sign.” (Spoiler: it wasn’t.) I want you to stop mistaking safety for boredom and start building the kind of secure relationship you’ve been craving! 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Why You Keep Mistaking Anxiety for Intuition in Your Relationship | 30 Sep 2025 | 00:19:42 | |
In this episode we’re unpacking one of the most confusing (and exhausting) dynamics in anxious relationships ➡️ Anxiety vs. Intuition. And why your nervous system can't tell the difference.... yet. We’ll dive into: ✨ The #1 way to know it’s anxiety (not intuition) ✨ How urgency, reactivity & spiraling feel like instinct - but aren’t ✨ Why you're addicted to checking the “emotional alarm system” ✨ What happens when your gut is actually trauma memory ✨ How to disable the internal alarm so you stop mistaking fear for truth ✨ What it actually feels like when your intuition is speaking PLUS: 🥲 A healing win from a client who went from toxic love + cancer treatment → to remission, emotional regulation, and finally letting love in 💅 🛏 My unhinged side quest to find the world’s best sheets (self-regulation starts in the bedroom, babes) 📲 Real talk Q&A from inside The Healing Girl Gang: “Is it weird he only calls at night?” 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| The Reason You Spiral Even When Nothing’s Wrong in Your Relationship | 23 Sep 2025 | 00:22:31 | |
You’re Not Overreacting - You’re Dysregulated (Here’s Why It Feels Like Everything’s Falling Apart When It’s Actually Fine) You’re not crazy. You’re not being dramatic. You’re just dysregulated AF and your body hasn’t caught up to how safe your life actually is. This episode is for the high-functioning, hyper-self-aware girlies who are checking all the boxes on paper... but still secretly spiraling in silence. 🙃 If you've ever caught yourself mid-anxiety spiral like: “Wait… nothing bad is happening. So why does this feel so familiar?” then this episode is the nervous system deep-dive you didn’t know you needed! 🧠 Inside this episode, we're unpacking: ✨ Why your brain panics when life finally feels calm ✨ How “being self-aware” can actually mask emotional control ✨ The difference between spiraling and actually self-regulating ✨ Why your nervous system doesn’t trust safety (yet) ✨ The powerful shift from “What’s wrong with me?” to “Of course I feel this way” ✨ How to stop rejecting the good stuff (including your partner’s love) ✨ Real wins from Healing Girl Gang members: showers, breathwork, daily habits that shift your state 💕 If you're tired of managing your emotions like a full-time job and you just want to feel safe being happy... this episode is for you! 🫶 Whether you’re newly dating, navigating relationship anxiety, or trying to trust your GOOD partner, this episode will give you the real talk, mindset shifts, and embodiment work you didn’t know you needed. 👉 Join here: healinggirlgang.com 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| You're self aware but still in the overthinking spiral? | 16 Sep 2025 | 00:23:06 | |
You’ve read the books, saved the Instagram carousels, diagnosed your attachment style (hi anxious girlies 👋), and can spot a spiral from a mile away… but you’re still spiraling?! 🌀 In this episode, we break down: 💭 Why high self-awareness doesn't stop the overthinking 🧠 The "anxious observer" trap (aka when you know you’re spiraling and still can’t stop) 🪞 How spiraling damages self-trust and your relationship ❤️🔥 The secret sauce to actually feeling safe (spoiler: it’s not just positive affirmations) 👩⚖️ A juicy client win (shoutout to M, our unbothered queen) 🌲 And what solo camping trips taught Clare about healing from abandonment wounds ✨ If you’re a high-achieving, emotionally intelligent woman who crushes it at work but crumbles inside a text bubble… this one’s for you. 🫶 Whether you’re newly dating, navigating relationship anxiety, or trying to trust your GOOD partner, this episode will give you the real talk, mindset shifts, and embodiment work you didn’t know you needed. 👉 Join here: healinggirlgang.com 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| When Overthinking Is Your Relationship Coping Mechanism (and why it’s not a Solution) | 09 Sep 2025 | 00:22:10 | |
Do you go to overthinking the second the vibes are off? Scroll TikTok for answers before the text even delivers? Google “anxious attachment + texting” like it’s your part-time job? Yeah. Me too. This episode is for the girlies who know they’re spiraling and feel like they can’t stop—especially when they’re dating someone good. If overthinking has become your coping mechanism in relationships, this episode will land. We’re talking: • Why your brain loves overthinking (hint: dopamine) • Why it feels productive, but actually disconnects you from real connection • How you're using mental work to avoid emotional work • The real reason you can explain your triggers but still don’t feel better I also share a story from my own spiral (yes, the lost RV keys) and shout out a few of my amazing clients who are breaking this cycle in real time—especially Seth and Autumn (you’re killin’ it 👏). If you’ve ever felt like: 🌀 “I can’t relax until I figure it out” 🧠 “I keep overthinking even though I know I’m safe” 💔 “I keep creating problems when there aren’t any” …this episode is for you. 💌 Inside the Healing Girl Gang, we’re taking this even deeper all month long masterclasses, implementation days, tools, coaching… the works. If this episode hits, wait ‘til you see what we do inside the gang.
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Why You Keep Spiraling Even When You Know Better | 02 Sep 2025 | 00:29:47 | |
✨ You’ve read the books. Listened to the podcasts. You could give a TED Talk on attachment styles. So why are you still spiraling?! In this episode I'm talking to YOU, the high-achieving, emotionally intelligent girlie who knows her patterns but still finds herself overthinking texts, replaying convos, and getting caught in the same loop with the same person... again. If you’ve ever thought: 🧠 “I know better, but I can’t stop overthinking.” 😬 “Why do I keep doing this when I’m so aware of what’s happening?” 💔 “I feel like two different people—confident in my career, anxious in my relationship.” Then hit play because this episode is for YOU! We’re breaking down: • Why knowing your attachment style isn’t enough • How your brain is prioritizing familiar over safe • What it really means to “feel ready” for love • Why you’re addicted to overthinking and calling it “clarity” • And how to finally shift from spiraling to self-trust 👯♀️ Bonus: I shout out a few of my 1:1 clients (hey, Mrs. N 👀) and show you what real healing looks like...not just awareness, but actual transformation. 🎧 And if you’re loving this, this is just the surface. Inside the Healing Girl Gang, we go deeper with tools, practice, and coaching to help you stop overthinking for real, not just for the afternoon. 👉 Join here: healinggirlgang.com 🦋 Ready for the deeper work? 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Is THIS The Most Toxic Habit of Anxious Attachment? | 26 Aug 2025 | 00:22:54 | |
✨ Ever feel like your brain just won’t shut off... even when everything’s actually fine in your relationship? You’re spiraling, checking for signs, running worst-case scenarios, and overanalyzing their every move... but you know deep down, it’s you, not them. 🤯 On this week's episode we're diving into what might be the most toxic, but totally normalized, habit anxious attached girlies keep doing… and why it’s actually keeping you stuck in the spiral. 😵💫 If you're a high-achieving, big-hearted babe who feels like she knows better but just can’t stop overthinking, this is your sign to tune in. We’re breaking down: - The real reason your brain loves to overthink (hint: dopamine hit 😬) - Why spiraling feels productive, even though it’s sabotaging connection - How overthinking is actually keeping you from intimacy—and what to do instead - What makes this pattern so hard to quit, even when your partner is amazing 💡 Plus, I'm giving you tools, truth bombs, and a loving kick in the butt to help you finally break the habit FOR GOOD! 🎧 LISTEN NOW and drop a comment if you’re deep in the spiral lately (no shame, you’re not alone). 👯♀️ Want more support? Join our private membership, the Healing Girl Gang, where we’re doing a 5-day Overthinking Detox all month long! You get the trainings, the tools, and the coaching to actually heal… not just cope.
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| 3 Things I Learned to Finally Stop Overthinking (after nearly 💩ing in a tent!) | 19 Aug 2025 | 00:29:33 | |
After six weeks of serious inner work (including a spiritual cleanse and a solo wilderness retreat where I literally faced my fear of abandonment head-on), I’m sharing the three biggest things that helped me stop overthinking once and for all. If you’re the kind of girly who spirals over a short text... rereads convos wondering what you did wrong... or catastrophizes when nothing is actually wrong... this episode is going to hit deep. Inside, we'll talk about: ✨ What it really means to listen to your body (and why it matters for your anxious brain) ✨ How productivity pressure secretly fuels relationship anxiety ✨ The difference between your gut and your fear brain ✨ And how I finally felt safe doing... nothing. Just being. Truly. PLUS: tomorrow (Wednesday!) is Implementation Day inside The Healing Girl Gang and this month’s focus is on Overthinking. If you’re ready for the how, this is where we get specific and walk through the process together. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How to Get Out of the Overthinking Loop for Good | 12 Aug 2025 | 00:21:48 | |
If you spiral when your partner seems distant… If your brain won’t stop running “what did I do wrong?” loops… If you’re smart, successful, high-achieving, and still struggling with anxious thoughts in love… You are so not alone. And this episode is for you. 🧠💔 We’re unpacking 3 hard truths about overthinking that every anxious-attached woman needs to hear (especially if you’ve tried everything and still find yourself mentally replaying texts, second-guessing convos, or feeling like your thoughts are running you). We're breaking down: ⭐️ The truth about why you can’t “outthink” fear ⭐️ What your spiral is actually protecting you from ⭐️ Why control isn’t the answer and what is ⭐️ How to retrain your nervous system instead of judging it Plus, a real-time coaching moment with a Healing Girl Gang member struggling to let go of someone who doesn’t see a future even though she still feels love for him. You’re going to want to hear this. 👀 🌿 Ready to heal the root of your relationship anxiety and stop the mental spiraling once and for all? Inside Healing Girl Gang, we do just that with masterclasses, implementation days, live coaching, and our Overthinking Detox every month. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| What I’m Still Healing (Even as a Relationship Coach) | 05 Aug 2025 | 00:19:36 | |
Ever feel like you're doing all the inner work, listening to every podcast, journaling your heart out and still fall back into the same anxious spirals or overthinking loops? SAME. In this raw and real episode, I’m pulling back the curtain and sharing what I’m still healing… even as a relationship coach. This episode is for the high-achieving, high-performing girlies who feel confident in their careers but are still spiraling in their relationships. 🎧 We’ll talk about: ✨The real reason your healing “isn’t sticking” ✨Why you might still spiral (even after tons of growth) ✨The sneaky trap of thinking healing means “no more conflict” ✨Why anxious attachment is less about perfection and more like tending a garden I also share a little life update from my pre-retreat cleanse, what’s been going on with my body lately (ladies, let’s talk hormones + 90s low-rise trauma 🙃), and a deeply personal coaching answer to a listener’s question about giving a partner space without losing your mind. ❤️ If you’ve ever thought “I should be over this by now”… this one’s for you. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| The Hidden Damage Overthinking Does to Your Relationship | 29 Jul 2025 | 00:18:24 | |
If You Overthink Every Text Message… This Episode Is For You! You’re crushing it at work, you're a boss in life, but when it comes to your relationship? You're suddenly spiraling over why he took 6-hours to text you back or asking "are we okay" over and over again... Then this episode is your soft place to land. In this episode we’re unpacking the hidden damage overthinking does to your relationships (even when things seem fine on the surface). I’ll walk you through: 💭 Why overthinking feels productive but keeps you disconnected 🧠 How your brain uses spiraling as a safety strategy 💗 What it actually takes to shift into emotional peace and connection 🏕 Plus: a lil’ story about Blair Witch-level camping chaos (you’ll get it)
👯♀️ Also, shoutout to my Healing Girl Gang - we answer a listener Q about anxious attachment + space in relationships that SO many of you will relate to. 🔔 Subscribe for weekly episodes on healing, relationships, anxious attachment & self-trust ⭐️ Leave a review, it keeps this podcast free and lets me know you’re out there 🛠 Join the Healing Girl Gang for masterclasses, live Q&As, overthinking detoxes + more
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| From Anxious to Secure: Client Transformation with Karuna! | 22 Jul 2025 | 00:38:32 | |
In this powerful episode, I sit down with my client Karuna - science writer, high achiever, and living proof that secure attachment is possible! We’re talking full transformation: from spiraling over missed texts to feeling calm, confident, and deeply self-trusting in relationships (and beyond). Karuna shares the real, raw moments (crying in the shower, questioning everything, and wondering if the anxiety would ever go away). But through coaching, truth-telling, and data-driven reflection (yes, we get nerdy), she experienced a 75%+ increase in her confidence, mindset, and self-trust AND a 133% decrease in her overthinking. 👀 Plus: → What it really feels like to date while anxious → Why traditional therapy didn’t quite cut it → The sneaky ways we micromanage our partners → What shifted when she stopped trying to be "less anxious" and started trusting herself This one is so honest, so hope-giving, and such a beautiful reminder that you’re not broken - you just haven’t been given the right tools yet.
🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| The Truth About Feeling Like You’re “Too Much” in Your Relationship | 15 Jul 2025 | 00:23:27 | |
Ever feel like you're just too much in your relationship? 😵💫 Like your emotions are too messy, too needy, or too intense so you try to keep them bottled up just to keep the peace? Yeah… been there. In this week’s episode we're getting into the real reason you feel like you're too much (and why it’s actually a sign you're ready to heal your anxious attachment for good!) This is for the high-achieving girlies who are secretly spiraling in their relationships. You know, refreshing your texts 12x an hour, over-apologizing for crying, or feeling like vulnerability makes you "bad at love." In this episode we're talking: ✨ Why your “too muchness” isn’t actually too much ✨ The role of emotional safety in healing anxious attachment ✨ How over-functioning at work translates to under-functioning in your relationships ✨ What your internal rulebook says about love...and how to rewrite it ✨ How to stop self-sabotaging when a secure partner shows up 💭 Plus, I share a personal story from a 1:1 client who broke the cycle (and what made her healing finally click). This one’s juicy, raw, and real and I can’t wait for you to hear it! 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| 3 Reasons Why Your Post-vacation Relationship Anxiety is Happening (again and again) | 08 Jul 2025 | 00:29:21 | |
You had an amazing weekend... the vibes were vibing, the cuddles were elite, and the connection felt so good. Then you got home, sat on the couch, and suddenly you’re spiraling. Sound familiar? This episode is all about why post-vacation (or post-holiday) anxiety hits so hard (especially if you’re anxiously attached and dating someone amazing). I’m breaking down the threebig reasons why you keep freaking out after it all went so well. 💥 We’re talking: • The honeymoon bubble (and why it messes with your nervous system) • The closeness crash (aka what happens when reality returns) • The expectation + confirmation bias gap (aka why a great weekend sets you up to doubt it all) Even if your partner is wonderful, even if everything is fine, your brain can still be screaming “danger.” You’re not broken. You just need tools, structure, and support and I’ve got you. 🫶 Plus: I’m sharing a Q from a Healing Girl Gang member struggling with anxiety after her partner reassures her (if that’s not real, I don’t know what is). ✨ If this resonates: • Leave a 5⭐️ review (it helps more than you know) • Join the Healing Girl Gang (Overthinking Detox kicks off this week!) • DM me your favorite takeaway from the episode Let’s normalize the weird grief of a great trip ending, and finally stop blowing up what’s actually going really well. WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| What a Secure Relationship Actually Looks Like (even if it feels weird) | 01 Jul 2025 | 00:20:02 | |
If slow feels boring, if calm feels confusing, and if your nervous system is low-key addicted to chaos.... this one’s for you. This week, we’re diving into what a secure relationship actually looks and feels like (even if your anxious attachment says, “Wait, is this it?”). Whether you’re dating, in a long-term partnership, or healing from relationship patterns that feel more like rollercoasters than real connection, I’m breaking down the 6 big shifts that define secure love. ✨ Spoiler alert: It’s not fast, intense, or dramatic. It’s steady. Consistent. Intentional. And deeply healing (even if your brain wants to sprint toward a vibe check). We’re talking: • Why moving fast ≠ connection • How to tell if you’re chasing intensity instead of sincerity • What “repair” looks like vs. reaction • And why secure love might feel… weird (at first) Plus, I’m sharing an honest question from one of my Healing Girl Gang members going through a painful breakup, and offering the truth we all need when we want to hold on instead of letting go. Let’s unlearn the chaos and relearn calm love, together. 🖐 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and rate 5 stars—it helps keep this podcast free and gives me a virtual high five from your earbuds 💕 WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Anxious attached with an Avoidant - Becoming Secure Together (Special Anniversary Episode!) | 24 Jun 2025 | 00:43:55 | |
It’s our 6-year wedding anniversary (!!) and today I brought my husband Craig on the podcast for the realest conversation about love, growth, and the journey from spiraling to secure. We’re answering your juiciest Qs: ✨ What it’s really like when anxious meets avoidant ✨ Our proposal story (yes, there was a backup plan involving a dog) ✨ How we almost didn’t make it—and what shifted ✨ Craig’s honest take on what helped him finally “grow up” emotionally ✨ Plus: our chaotic traits, icks, inside jokes, and a BIG announcement (no, not a baby) Whether you’re deep in your healing era or just curious about what it looks like to actually do this work with a partner, this episode is for you. It’s honest. It’s sweet. It’s full of growth and some light roasting (Just the way we like it!) WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Why You Think Its Your Fault in the Relationship (even when its not) | 17 Jun 2025 | 00:18:01 | |
Still Needing Constant Reassurance in Your Relationship? Here’s Why 👀 . This episode is for the anxious girlies who look like they have it all together … but on the inside, you’re checking the vibes like it’s your full-time job. We’re talking: ✨ Why your brain craves constant reassurance—and how to stop needing it ✨ The connection between high achievement & emotional hypervigilance ✨ How to build real self-trust (the kind that doesn’t care if he texts back in 5 min or 5 hours) PLUS: I’m sharing a few of the funniest icks from my DMs (and you will scream at one of them) 😂 If you're secretly struggling in a relationship that "should" feel safe, you're not crazy and you're definitely not alone. This episode will help you shift from spiraling to self-secure. 💌 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG This month inside the Girl Gang, we’re doing a full detox of overthinking + learning exactly how to soothe yourself without needing 24/7 validation from your partner. Want in? DM me “GIRLGANG” on IG or click the link below. 🖐 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and rate 5 stars—it helps keep this podcast free and gives me a virtual high five from your earbuds 💕 WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How To Stop Needing Constant Reassurance | 10 Jun 2025 | 00:21:18 | |
This episode is for the anxious girlies who look like they have it all together (you’ve got degrees, deadlines, and the job)… but on the inside, you’re checking the relationship vibes like it’s your full-time job. We’re talking: ✨ Why your brain craves constant reassurance and how to stop needing it ✨ The connection between high achievement & emotional hyper-vigilance ✨ How to build real self-trust (the kind that doesn’t care if he texts back in 5 min or 5 hours) PLUS: I’m sharing a few of the funniest icks from the TickerTocker (and you will scream at one of them) 😂 If you're secretly struggling in a relationship that "should" feel safe, you're not crazy and you're definitely not alone. This episode will help you shift from spiraling to self-secure. 💌 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG This month inside the Girl Gang, we’re doing a full detox of overthinking + learning exactly how to soothe yourself without needing 24/7 validation from your partner. Want in? DM me “GIRLGANG” on IG! WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| 3 Reasons Why Your Anxious Attachment Isn't Healing | 03 Jun 2025 | 00:24:13 | |
We’re unpacking the 3 big reasons your anxious attachment isn’t healing, even if you’re doing everything “right.” Spoiler: it’s not about trying harder… it’s about trying differently. If you’re a high-achieving, self-aware, anxious girlie who still feels like a walking red flag in relationships, this one’s for you. We’re talking: ✨ Why performing yur healing is keeping you stuck ✨ The myth of linear progress (and why healing is actually a spiral staircase ✨ How to stop overwatering the plant and just let it grow 🪴 Plus, I’m sharing a wild story from the internet girlie streets (hi, Wizard Liz 👀) that proves you can be a literal goddess and still get ghosted, cheated on, or confused AF in love. 💌 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG If you’re ready to actually break the anxious cycle and learn to feel safe in your body (not just in theory), come hang with us inside the Girl Gang. Monthly deep dives, nervous system rituals, and a no-perfection zone. WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube
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| How She Went From Overthinking Everything to Feeling Secure in Love | 28 May 2025 | 00:25:45 | |
Ever wonder what it actually looks like to go from anxious, overthinking, “I’m probably the problem” energy… to grounded, confident, and finally feeling secure in your relationship? In this raw and heart-hitting episode, I’m sitting down with one of my 1:1 coaching client, a high-achieving, military-working, nurse-extraordinaire, who decided to stop spiraling overseas (literally!) and finally heal for real. We’re talking: 💭 Overthinking and the "doom scroll" inside your own brain 💌 How your childhood wounds sneak into adult relationships 📲 Why waiting on a text back used to ruin her day — and what’s changed 💥 The difference between self-help and actual transformation 🌊 And how she learned to communicate without blowing things up Plus: what made her go from “I can fix this on my own” to “I need deeper support”… and how that shift changed everything. If you’ve ever felt like you’re “too much,” like you’re self-sabotaging something good, or like your brain just won’t stop spinning…this episode is for you. WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Reminders For When You Have Your Anxious Attachment Triggered | 13 May 2025 | 00:24:34 | |
Ever find yourself refreshing your texts like your life depends on it? Or spending 10 hours doing two hours of work because your brain won’t stop obsessing over that thing you said? Yep. This one’s for you, bb! In this episode, I’m giving you powerful (and surprisingly calming) reminders for when your anxious attachment kicks in HARD. Whether you're deep in a spiral or just know one is brewing, these are the things I wish someone had told me when I was riding the relationship-anxiety rollercoaster daily. We're talking: - The difference between urgency and truth (spoiler: they are not the same) - Why “if it feels hysteric, it’s historic” is your new healing mantra - The cold hard truth: you cannot out-logic your nervous system (sorry to my high-achieving girlies with 3 degrees and a color-coded Google calendar) Plus: a little gut health update (yes, your anxiety might be coming from your stomach), a hilarious “Would You Rather” game you’re gonna want to bring to your next girls’ night, and a juicy Q&A from inside the Healing Girl Gang! 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| How To Stop Self-Silencing and Express Your Feelings (without the spiral) | 07 May 2025 | 00:24:46 | |
Ever held it in like a champ… until you exploded over something small (but actually not small at all)? 🙃 You didn’t want to ruin the vibe. It was the weekend. You were on vacation. You told yourself “It’s fine” five times in your head and then snapped over the way they chewed. Yup. This one’s for you, babe. In this weeks episode , we’re talking:
If you’ve ever said “it’s not a big deal” when it 100% was a big deal — I got you. ✨ Also — the Healing Girl Gang is diving deep into communication this month. We’ve got the live training, the action steps, the process, the coaching... the whole damn toolkit. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| Why You Keep Overexplaining (and Still Feel Misunderstood) | 29 Apr 2025 | 00:23:07 | |
Why do we keep explaining... and explaining... and explaining — and still walk away feeling misunderstood (and kind of embarrassed)? 😵💫 In this week's episode we’re diving into why overexplaining is so common for high-achieving, anxious-attached girlies — and why it actually makes you feel less secure (not more). We’ll talk about: - How overexplaining is really a nervous system response (not just “bad communication”) - Why your anxious attachment thrives on overexplaining (and how to gently stop) - The difference between clarifying vs. oversharing - Simple, real-world tools to feel heard without feeling like you’re doing a TED Talk at your boyfriend 🚩 If you’re ready to stop feeling like you need a PowerPoint presentation to get your needs met, you’re in the right place. 😌✨ 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| How to build self-trust (after a lifetime of self-abandonment) | 22 Apr 2025 | 00:26:50 | |
You’re the go-to girl at work, the one who gets it DONE… but when it comes to your relationship? Cue the overthinking, second-guessing, and constant need for reassurance. 🫠 Sound familiar? This week we’re talking about one of the BIGGEST blocks I see with my high-achieving, high-performing girlies: how to actually build self-trust (especially after a lifetime of self-abandonment). If you’ve ever: - Been the “strong one” for everyone else but secretly crumble when your partner doesn’t text back 💬 - Checked every box on the “secure girlie” to-do list (yoga, sound baths, Pilates, booked & busy) but still feel exhausted and anxious 😩 - Overfunctioned in your career while under-trusting yourself in love ❤️🔥 …then sis, this episode is FOR YOU.
We’re diving into: ✨ Why performing self-care and performing self-trust aren’t the same as feeling secure ✨ The sneaky ways high-achievers self-abandon (and how it’s killing your inner trust) ✨ How to stop looking externally (the career wins, the gym streak, the packed calendar) for the thing only YOU can give yourself ✨ My simple, no-fluff self-trust routine that actually works to calm your nervous system and build rock-solid security (spoiler: it’s not about doing more) I’m sharing the real talk I wish I had years ago—because healing your anxious attachment starts with learning how to trust the most important person in the room: YOU. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| Am I Triggered or Am I Right? How to Tell the difference! | 15 Apr 2025 | 00:29:16 | |
Are you overthinking every convo, second-guessing yourself constantly, and wondering... “Am I triggered or am I actually right?” 😅 Welcome to the most validating episode you didn’t know you needed. In this week’s episode we’re diving deep into that hot mess moment we all know too well—when you can’t tell if your anxious attachment is flaring up or if your intuition is genuinely trying to protect you. 💥 If you’ve ever: Spiraled after a text delay 📱 Felt “too much” even though you KNOW you're with a good person 💗 Asked 3 friends, 2 Google searches, and your therapist the same thing 🙃 Collected screenshots like receipts to confirm your vibe was right 🧾 …this episode is your new safe space. We’re breaking down: 👉 What confirmation bias looks like in relationships 👉 How to know if your emotional response is actually valid 👉 Why your triggers don’t just go away (and what to do instead) 👉 The #1 mindset shift that will change how you show up in love for good ✨ Plus: I share what really helped me go from spiraling every other Monday to building secure, drama-free connection with my partner (and it’s not what you think). 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| The Real Reason You Don’t Feel Secure in a Good Relationship | 08 Apr 2025 | 00:19:17 | |
This week, we're getting real about the messy middle — where you logically know you’re in a good relationship but emotionally still feel anxious AF. If you’re constantly asking:
Then this episode is your exact starting point. 👏 Inside, we’re talking about: ✨ Why the key to feeling secure in your relationship starts with YOU (not him, not a text back, not a future ring) 🧠 How morphing into the ‘perfect partner’ keeps you in anxious mode 💗 Why being your authentic self is the foundation for real, lasting love 🔁 What happens when you’re stuck in the “prove myself” cycle (and how to stop) 💬 And why your deepest fear might not be about love... but being alone 👀 Plus, I’m answering a powerful listener question about letting go of a relationship, fear of being alone, and how to move forward when you're committed to finally breaking the cycle. 💔➡️💪 Let this be your permission slip to stop performing in your relationship, and start being the most you version of you — because that's where true security lives. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| The Instant Fix for Anxious Attachment Triggers | 01 Apr 2025 | 00:25:11 | |
Welcome to the episode every anxious attachment girlie needs in her back pocket. If you spiral when they don’t text back, replay convos 14 times in your head, or wake up with an emotional hangover worse than a tequila bender… this one's for you. 💌 We’re talking about what actually works in the heat of the moment — when you’re triggered, panicked, and low-key ready to throw your phone out the window. 💅 Inside this episode, I’m breaking down: 🧠 What it means to act from your wound vs. your healing 💌 How to stop overthinking in real-time — without ghosting your own needs 🌱 The 3-part process that’s helping my clients regulate their triggers instantly ⚡ Why vulnerability (yes, the scary kind) is the REAL fix for the spiral 🧃 And the tea on emotional hangovers vs. real healing (spoiler: hot girl walks won’t fix your subconscious) PLUS: I answer a listener question about feeling anxious when your man is off having fun — even if he’s never given you a reason not to trust him. 👀 Let’s ditch the “I’m fine” mask, stop walking it off, and start healing in real-time. You deserve secure love 💕 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Spot Hyper-Independence Triggers in Your Relationship | 25 Mar 2025 | 00:22:34 | |
Let’s be real: you’re the hyper-independent girlie who gets ish DONE. You’ve got the degree, the business, the receipts. But when it comes to relationships? Your anxious attachment is quietly (or not so quietly) throwing hands in the background. 😅 In this episode, I’m diving deep into what I call the "Don’t need anyone but kinda wish they’d text me first" energy — aka the sneaky link between anxious attachment and hyper-independence. Because yes, you can be both! If you've ever said: ➤ “I can just do it myself”, “I don’t need anyone”... but secretly want someone to show up for you... 👀 bb, this episode is for you. We’re talking: ✨ The blind spots that keep you stuck in ‘strong girl’ mode: ✨ Self-sabotage in love (and how to spot it) ✨ The trap of over-functioning — in relationships AND at work ✨ Why needing support is not a weakness ✨ And how to stop masking vulnerability with perfectionism Plus, I’m sharing a few real, raw stories (including the one where I got applauded for leaving my plate out?? Yes. You’ll get it when you hear it.) 👑 Whether you're dating, in a relationship, or single but spiraling, this episode is a mirror. And it’s time to stop choosing patterns that don’t serve the secure, healthy love you actually want. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Mistakes in Treating Anxious Attachment Triggers | 18 Mar 2025 | 00:22:03 | |
In this episode, I’m breaking down the biggest mistakes I see when people try to “fix” their anxious attachment triggers—and why those habits might actually be keeping you stuck in the same cycle. 🚨 We’re diving into: 🔥 Why being hard on yourself is making it worse (and what to do instead) 🔥 The sneaky ways perfectionism is showing up in your healing process 🔥 How to stop intellectualizing and actually feel secure in your body 🔥 Why masking your emotions is lowkey ruining your relationships 🔥 How to self-soothe without avoidance, isolation, or spiraling I’ve made these mistakes. My clients have made these mistakes. But the good news? You don’t have to keep making them. 🙌🏼 So if you’re tired of catching yourself in the same relationship spirals, constantly trying to “fix” things that aren’t broken, or feeling like no amount of journaling and self-work is actually shifting anything… this episode is for you. ✨ Ready to stop self-sabotaging and start feeling secure? 👉🏽 Drop a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review if this hit home (seriously, it helps SO much!) 👉🏽 Join me in the Healing Girl Gang for the full training in April 👉🏽 DM me “TRIGGERS” on IG if you’re ready for deeper support! 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Anxiously Attached to ENGAGED?! | 11 Mar 2025 | 00:22:41 | |
Imagine going from spiraling over “Do they really like me?” to casually ring shopping like it’s no big deal. 🤯 That’s exactly what’s happening for my clients—and in this episode, I’m giving you the real tea on how they went from anxious to ENGAGED. 💍✨ If you’re a high-achieving, overthinking, lowkey-perfectionist queen who’s crushing it in your career but secretly struggling with relationship anxiety (yeah, I see you), this episode is going to hit hard. 🔥 Here’s what we’re diving into: ✨ Why anxious attachment doesn’t have to mean relationship struggle forever ✨ The #1 mindset shift my clients made that changed everything ✨ How to stop spiraling over your relationship and start feeling secure ✨ What happens when you finally face your fears instead of avoiding them If you’re tired of playing it cool while your brain is running worst-case scenarios 24/7, hit play NOW. And if this resonates? Drop a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ review so more girlies can find this and start healing, too! P.S. If you’re ready to actually do the work that gets you to this level of peace in your relationship, let’s talk. Because the truth? What you don’t change, you choose. 🫶🏼 👉🏽 DM me on Instagram or checkout the links below to work together!
💡 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG—For Q&As, trainings, workbooks, and all the tools you need to stop spiraling over your relationship. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| When You Want More Effort From Your Partner | 04 Mar 2025 | 00:22:32 | |
Feel like you're the one keeping the relationship alive? 😩 You’re planning the dates, remembering the little things, prioritizing them… and they’re just kinda there. So what gives? Are you asking for too much? Are they low-effort or just wired differently? And most importantly—how do you actually get them to step up without nagging, over-functioning, or feeling like you have to prove your worth? I gotchu, bb! Today, we’re breaking it all down: 🔥 Why high-achieving women struggle with feeling like it’s never enough (and why this shows up in your relationships) 🧠 How subconscious programming is keeping you stuck in over-giving mode 💡 Signs you’re acting from a wound vs. a real relationship need 🚩 What to do if your partner’s effort feels just a little too bare minimum 👑 How to communicate your needs without being needy (yes, it’s possible!)
Also—big news! 🎉 My Align Mini Retreat is happening March 8 in San Diego 🌊 This is your chance to actually feel what secure love is like—to shift your energy, embody confidence, and experience transformation in real time. If you’re in SoCal, you NEED to be there! 🌊join me for an intimate healing mini-retreat in a stunning oceanfront sanctuary! 🌊 https://www.healinggirlgang.com/offers/FTmRxFat/checkout?coupon_code=100OFF
💡 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG—For Q&As, trainings, workbooks, and all the tools you need to stop spiraling over your relationship. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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| When It Feels Like You're Doing All the Work in Your Relationship | 25 Feb 2025 | 00:22:09 | |
STOP DOING ALL THE WORK IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP 😤 (Why You’re Exhausted & How to Fix It) Ever feel like you’re carrying the whole damn relationship on your back? Planning the dates, making space in your schedule, keeping the energy going—while he just... coasts? Yeah, I see you, and this episode is for you. Today, we’re breaking down why high-achieving, type-A women (hi, that’s you👋) often fall into the pattern of over-functioning in relationships—and what to do about it. Because relationships aren’t meant to feel like a group project where you’re doing all the work while your partner barely puts in effort. We’re talking about: ✨ Why doing less in your relationship actually makes it stronger ✨ How your anxious attachment + overachiever mindset keep you stuck ✨ The sneaky ways you might be self-sabotaging your relationship ✨ How to lean back, stop overextending, and let THEM step up 👀
🔥 UPCOMING TRAINING: Ready to actually implement this? In March, I’m teaching a LIVE training on how to communicate your needs without feeling needy + set boundaries that don’t backfire. Stay tuned! 💡 JOIN THE HEALING GIRL GANG—For Q&As, trainings, workbooks, and all the tools you need to stop spiraling over your relationship. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session | |||
| Stopping the Systemic Self Sabotage & Relationship Anxiety | 19 Feb 2025 | 00:54:20 | |
This week I’m joined by Dr. Jeanine Staples-Dixon, a literal genius, tenured professor at Penn State, and someone who knows why you keep self-sabotaging in love. We’re breaking down: 🔥 Why your relationship anxiety isn’t just a “you” thing—it’s a SYSTEM thing 🔥 How patriarchy, white supremacy & capitalism keep you chasing love & approval 🔥 The sneaky ways you abandon yourself trying to “win” a man’s attention 🔥 How to de-center a man (without ruining your relationship, I swear) 🔥 What ACTUALLY makes you feel safe & secure in love (hint: not another anxious text at 2AM 💀) ⚡ If you’re tired of spiraling, waiting for his texts, and feeling like a full-time detective on his IG stories—this episode is for you. 💡 The self-trust era is upon us. Because you don’t need to prove your worth to anyone, and you sure as hell don’t need to perform for love. Let’s fix this. 🔥Click here to grab the Relationship Glow-up Guide! 🔥 FOLLOW CLARE ON Instagram, TikTok or YouTube WORK WITH ME: VIP 1:1 Session
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