In this timely episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest tackle the anxiety and uncertainty so many are feeling about the state of today’s world. They discuss why everything feels so overwhelming right now, share practical ways to manage those emotions, and explore how we can stay grounded, take ownership of what we can control, and maintain a sense of connection with others. Topics include managing uncertainty, wise skepticism, developing agency, accepting impermanence, and understanding grief as a deep form of love and connection. Whether you're feeling anxious about global events or just navigating daily life, this episode offers practical advice for building resilience. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: Why do things feel so terrifying? 11:45: A typical response to the state of the world 17:40: Recognizing how much uncertainty there is 25:35: Feeling grounded in your personal integrity 32:30: Taking ownership of what you are able to contribute 39:00: Our felt sense of connection with others 44:20: Accepting impermanence 49:00: Grief as a form of love and connection 54:15: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.  OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest explores how we can harness perfectionism’s strengths without getting captured by its vulnerabilities with therapist and author Katherine Morgan Schafler. They talk about perfectionism’s bad branding, and how our relationship with perfectionism can lead to it being either a superpower or a stumbling block. They discuss the different types of perfectionists, the limitations of defining perfectionism merely as a defense against criticism, and the importance of shifting our language around self-criticism. You’ll learn about the difference between power and control, why self-compassion beats self-punishment, and how to keep perfectionism in check while still reaching your goals. About our Guest: Katherine is a psychotherapist, former on-site therapist at Google, and author of the recent book The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control: A Path to Peace and Power. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Defining perfectionism 6:00: Ideals, identity, and asking yourself how and why you’re striving 12:40: The five types of perfectionists 21:55: Why defining perfectionism as a ‘defense against criticism’ falls short 28:20: Changing our vocabulary around self-criticism 34:00: Why self-punishment doesn’t work 38:10: The difference between power and control 44:40: Splitting vs. scaling, and reaching out for connection 49:10: When perfectionistic tendencies invade our relationships 54:10: The intention that drives real goals, and finding your metric for measuring success 1:07:10: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month.  OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest finish their series on the stress responses with the fawn response: an appeasement strategy where we manage stressful situations by giving others what they want. Rick and Forrest start by discussing common symptoms, including people pleasing, self-abandonment, difficulty saying no, weak boundaries, and chronic self-sacrifice. They talk about the roots of the fawn response and its connection to complex PTSD before exploring people pleasing in detail. In the second half of the episode they focus on practical tools for developing healthy boundaries, self-acceptance, and a stronger sense of self. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 2:15: What the fawn response looks like 9:05: Power imbalances, shame, and contempt 11:35: What personal history tends to lead to fawning? 20:00: How to work on the tendency to fawn 36:30: Shame, self-acceptance, and opening up to self-expression 41:25: The fawn response in relationship 46:40: Becoming your own source of safety 52:20: Making equitable arrangements, and acknowledging your best efforts 1:01:50: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. Zocdoc helps you find expert doctors and medical professionals that specialize in the care you need, and deliver the type of experience you want. Head to zocdoc.com/being and download the Zocdoc app for FREE. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On the previous episode of Being Well, we talked about how to identify our wants and needs...but identifying our needs is just the first step. After that comes the tricky business of coming to terms with those needs, and communicating them effectively to other people. In this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore best practices for claiming and expressing our needs. This includes how to navigate shame and inhibition, make effective agreements, be considerate of the person on the receiving end of our wants, and become more skillful at negotiation and repair.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Getting real about meeting our needs. 7:10: Suppressing needs due to self-worth challenges 8:35: Patience, making your offering, and tipping points 11:45: Inhibition, and negotiating our needs with other people 15:50: Non-Violent Communication and “Wise Speech” models 26:30: The need for multiple cycles of communication 28:20: Expecting defeat, and two big moments of pain 32:10: Keeping agreements 37:45: Confidence in the ability to repair 39:35: Considering the person on the receiving end of your communication 43:00: Generosity 45:15: Questions to ask when feeling uncertain about how to express a need 49:30: Death by a thousand cuts, and facing discomfort 52:10: Asking others, “What else do you want from me?” 54:30: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Listen to Season 2 of Turning Points from Boston Globe Media wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everyone has needs, but many people find it difficult to identify what authentically matters to them. Even when we can identify them, shame or fear often stops us from expressing those needs to others or taking the practical steps that would help us achieve them. Meeting our needs is a major source of well-being, and people who can identify their needs are more likely to get them met. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson focus on how to look inside, and figure out what you really need. They discuss different frameworks for categorizing our needs, what to do when we are confused by our desires, and how to get in touch with what you really want. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Common features among people who struggle to name their desires 7:05: Three basic steps to relate to wants and needs 8:00: Different frameworks for categorizing wants and needs 21:00: What helped Rick get in touch with his own wants and needs? 28:00: An experiential exercise 35:10: Why addressing your needs and wants is not just naval gazing 38:40: Forrest’s suggestions based on his own experience 45:25: What to do when what we want is probably not best for us 51:40: Creating a personal manifesto 54:30: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Renowned physician Dr. Gabor Maté joins Rick and Forrest to explore the many problems for our bodies and minds that arise out of our modern culture, and what we can do to meet our needs, heal ourselves, and become more whole. They discuss our increasing separation from one another, issues with aspects of the medical model, the true nature of addiction, the developmental needs of children, the myth of “normal,” and recovering from traumatic experiences. About Our Guest: Dr. Gabor Maté is one of the world’s leading experts on trauma, addiction, and childhood development. His work has had an enormous impact on how we understand the interactions between our internal world and the world around us, and he is the bestselling author of In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts, Scattered Minds, and his newest book The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: What Gabor means by a toxic culture 4:25: Interpersonal biology - our physiology is modulated by our relationships 7:10: What components are needed for a healthy culture? 11:55: Examples of toxic culture’s impact on people’s behavior 15:20: Addiction 21:00: How and when to distinguish degrees of trauma 27:05: Where and when to express healthy anger 33:10: How turning against the self manifests as illness  36:45: What supports people in returning to their authentic nature? 40:00: Psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy, and creating a sacred context 41:45: Grief, integration, and letting go 44:55: Gabor’s relationship with his children 48:25: Five kinds of compassion, disillusionment, and truth 51:20: Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary? 53:25: Recap New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all have narcissistic traits. Having some sense of our own specialness isn’t just normal, it’s actually psychologically healthy. The problems start when people go beyond normal levels, and become addicted to feeling special. On this episode, Forrest is joined by Dr. Craig Malkin to explore narcissism and narcissistic traits. They talk about the different forms narcissism takes, the difference between narcissistic traits and narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), red flags, dealing with narcissists, treatment options, and finding the “right amount” of feeling special. About our Guest: Dr. Malkin is a Lecturer in Psychology for Harvard Medical School, a licensed psychologist with several decades of clinical experience, and the author of Rethinking Narcissism: The Secret to Recognizing and Coping with Narcissists. He also has a great YouTube channel.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Narcissism as a pervasive universal trait 4:10: What differentiates healthy narcissism vs. disordered narcissism? 5:45: “Triple E” - exploitation, entitlement, empathy impairments 6:45: Incapable of empathy, or unmotivated? 9:10: What distinguishes having narcissistic traits from having NPD? 13:05: Extraverted, covert, and communal narcissism 23:10: Healthy and unhealthy narcissistic traits often go together 25:20: Insecure attachment 28:30: Emotional hot potato 32:10: Social and cultural power dynamics  36:25: What does healing narcissism look like? 42:55: What modalities do you use in therapy? 45:20: Difficult relationships, communal activation, empathy prompts 50:35: Extinction bursts and using anxiety responses in therapy 53:25: How do you repair with your partner?  57:05: Recap Grief and Loss Workshop: We all face losses in life, from separation and disappointment to shocking, even traumatic events. Join me August 13 and 14 for 7 hours of LIVE, online teaching focused on learning simple, powerful practices that help us come to terms with loss, heal, and find happiness again. Use coupon code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off the registration price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all experience big, difficult feelings, from common emotions like uncertainty, anger, despair, and regret, to difficult experiences like the pains of comparison, burnout, and perfectionism. On today’s episode of Being Well Podcast, Forrest is joined by the wonderful author, coach, and content creator Mollie West Duffy to explore how we can accept those big feelings, learn to live alongside them, and develop tools that help us deal with them more effectively. About Our Guest: Mollie is an expert in organizational design, development, and leadership who has helped advise and coach executives and founders at companies including Google, Casper, and LinkedIn. She’s the co-author of the bestselling book No Hard Feelings: The Secret Power of Embracing Emotions at Work, and the recently released Big Feelings: How To Be Okay When Things Are Not Okay, and is also one half of the Instagram account, @lizandmollie.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:30: Why is Mollie’s new book called Big Feelings? 5:10: The useful flip side 6:45: How Mollie’s relationship to anger changed during the creation of this book 9:20: Difficult emotions as a resource and source of regulation 11:30: Unhelpful myths in how to deal with difficult emotions 16:45: Healthy responses to those myths 21:10: Vulnerability 25:50: Emotional granularity 27:05: Lengthening the time between trigger and response 30:05: Processing anxiety 35:25: How to relax the desire for control 41:45: Medication 44:10: Anxiety doesn’t accurately reflect risk 46:40: Burnout - even around things you enjoy 55:25: Comparing our suffering with others 57:05: Comparing our accomplishments with others 1:01:35: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Receiving a diagnosis can be emotionally challenging, and leave a person with a lot of understandable questions: What does this mean? What do I do now? How do I relate to this? On this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore what a diagnosis is, how the diagnostic process works, the limitations of diagnosing someone, dealing with the emotions that come up, and how we can better think about and relate to receiving a diagnosis. Throughout the conversation they focus on how we can come to understand ourselves better, and be liberated by that understanding rather than burdened by it. ADHD is used a number of times during this conversation as an example, so if you have an ADHD diagnosis this episode could be particularly interesting. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:55: What is a diagnosis, and what is the process used to give a diagnosis? 6:50: What is the purpose of diagnosing someone? 8:50: Situating what defines pathology within our evolutionary and cultural context 11:40: Origins of mental health conditions, social environment, and privilege 14:40: How diagnosis done, and differentiating between different diagnoses 25:05: More discussion on environmental and cultural effects 31:10: Three subtypes of ADHD 33:00: The emotional complexity of receiving a diagnosis 42:30: What helps people in working through the emotions that come up? 46:35: Paying attention to your emotional experience as much as solving your problem. 49:35: Mental health awareness, resources, and support from others 51:00: Rick’s response when someone is given a diagnosis 58:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There’s been an explosion of interest in psychedelics over the last 10 years, and phrases like “psychedelic-assisted therapy” have gone from the relative fringes of the mental health conversation to bursting into the mainstream. Alongside a great deal of hype is a growing body of research revealing the potential of substances like psilocybin and MDMA as novel treatments for depression, addiction, and PTSD.  On today’s episode of Being Well, Forrest is joined by Dr. Albert Garcia-Romeu from the Johns Hopkins Center for Psychedelic and Consciousness Research. They explore the history and current state of psychedelic research, their subjective effects, the necessity of the “trip,” how psychedelics work in the brain, why researchers are so interested in these substances, and what a psychedelic-assisted therapy session looks like. About Our Guest: Dr. Garcia-Romeu is a member of the Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences faculty at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine. His research examines the effects of psychedelics in humans, with a focus on psilocybin as an aid in the treatment of addiction. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: Dr. Garcia-Romeu’s background 3:00: What substances have been the focus of research? 8:10: The history of psychedelics 11:15: Usefulness and subjective effects of classical psychedelics (LSD/Psilocybin) 17:35: Ego loss or “ego-death” and the role of spirituality in mental health 21:40: What is happening neurologically with Psilocybin?  27:55: Psychedelics may be the best current treatment option for some conditions 35:05: How close is the research to proving efficacy? 38:05: The relative safety of psychedelics 41:00: What does a psychedelic-assisted therapy session look like? 47:00: Self-guidance in a session 49:50: Duration of treatment, financial and legal access 54:00: Using psychedelics for personal growth, spiritual practice, and even recreation 58:00: Where is the field going? 59:25: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The median life expectancy for a man living in the United States is roughly 80 years. That works out to 960 months, 4,160 weeks, or about 29,000 days. Rick is sneaking up on 70 years old, which means, on average, he's got about 10 years – or 520 weeks – left.  Putting the time we have left into simple numbers can be both a bit daunting and remarkably clarifying. When you're in the middle of them, the days can blur together. But the truth is that our time’s limited, and how we use it is up to us. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson talk about what's helped them come to terms with mortality, the reality of our limited time, and how we can use that knowledge to refine our focus and live a more fulfilling life. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 4:00: How Rick’s relationship with death has changed over time 11:05: Appreciating life as a comfort in accepting death 14:00: Dukkah, Tanha, and contentment 16:30: Distinguishing the ocean (reality) from the wave (ego) 21:20: Acceptance, contraction, and expansion 25:35: Finite experiences, and undelivered communications 31:30: “Life is for the living” 33:10: Giving, contribution, contentment, and fulfillment 40:05: What to do about regret? 47:40: Serenity in old age 49:00: Practical ways to hold awareness of death 55:05: Recap   Grief and Loss Workshop: We all face losses in life, from separation and disappointment to shocking, even traumatic events. Join me August 13 and 14 for 7 hours of LIVE, online teaching focused on learning simple, powerful practices that help us come to terms with loss, heal, and find happiness again. Use coupon code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off the registration price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.   Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Shame is one of the most complex and difficult emotions we experience on a regular basis, and one that can have seriously negative impacts on our sense of self-worth and ability to experience healthy connection with others. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson take a deep dive into what shame is, how it develops, and what distinguishes it from guilt and other related emotions. They then focus on questioning our assumptions about shame, which can help us identify where it comes from.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:40: The biological roots of shame 4:00: Shame's ties to our assumptions about the world  7:00: Impropriety, and shame as a psychological stage of development 9:55: Distinguishing shame from guilt 14:00: Unnecessary shame, healthy remorse, and your own integrity system 21:55: Who decides what being good looks like? 25:40: Morality in the service of power 32:20: What helps us work with experiences of shame 38:25: Isolation and the value of sharing with others in some way 43:50: Working with your shame story 49:00: Shame, group belonging, and personal change 51:25: Recap   Rick's Grief and Loss Workshop: We all face losses in life, from separation and disappointment to shocking, even traumatic events. Join Rick August 13 and 14 for 7 hours of LIVE, online teaching focused on learning simple, powerful practices that help us come to terms with them, heal, and find happiness again. Use coupon code BeingWell50 at checkout for an additional $50 off the registration price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There’s a lot of loss in the world these days, both in our individual lives and in our broader communities, and with those losses comes grief. Grief is one of the most challenging emotions to be with, and it can be difficult to offer generalized advice because everyone's experience of grief is profoundly unique.  On today’s episode of Being Well, Forrest is joined by one of the world’s leading researchers on grief, Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor, to help us better understand grief and grieving. They explore why grief is such a unique and intense emotion, how grief works in the brain, the problems with generalized models like the “five stages of grief,” and how we can learn to live with loss. About Our Guest: Mary-Frances is a neuroscientist, clinical psychologist, and associate professor of psychology at the University of Arizona, where she directs the Grief, Loss and Social Stress Lab, which investigates the effects of grief on the brain and the body. She’s also the author of the wonderful book The Grieving Brain: The Surprising Science of How We Learn from Love and Loss.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and disclaimer 3:35: Mary-Frances’ personal background 6:55: Distinguishing grief from grieving 9:20: Self-criticism, and the over-focus on recovery 11:20: Grief isn't "something to get over" 13:00: Attachment, and our neurological map 16:00: Prediction error 19:30: Complicated grief 25:00: Spiritual practice, or having a worldview that incorporates death 28:05: Is there a ‘normal’ grieving process? 35:25: Pathology, and normal human experiences 46:00: Neurological overview of grief in the brain 50:40: The Dual Process Model of Grief 54:10: Sometimes distraction is okay 56:15: Therapeutic practices and learning from grief 1:01:00: Grief and its relationship to love 1:03:40: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Somatic trauma therapist Elizabeth Ferreira joins Forrest to explore how we can create more secure relationships. They talk about the lessons they've learned from their relationship, the impact of trauma and prior relationship wounds, and how very different people can make things work. Topics include complex PTSD, how to work through disagreements, changing our model of relationships, and learning how to actually support your partner. I loved this conversation, and hope you enjoy it! You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:10: The myth of relationships solving your problems, and self-awareness 4:25: Me, you, and us 13:45: Changing your partner by changing yourself 16:45: Embracing the challenges of vulnerability 23:25: Disagreeing well, making specific requests, and holding space 33:05: Learning how to support your partner 37:40: Five different styles of relationship 40:55: Moving from trying to please your partner to showing compassion 45:15: Love as a choice, and expressing wants and needs positively 49:30: Simply liking your partner I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of the most important and challenging skills we can develop is learning to regulate our strong emotions. While it’s very natural to have fluctuations in how we feel about others and ourselves, for some people these ups and downs are particularly intense. At clinical levels, this is known as Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).  BPD is characterized by a pattern of instability in a person’s emotions, moods, behavior, self-image, and relationships. BPD is fairly common, and it's even more common for "borderline-y tendencies" to show up in our lives. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore what to do when these tendencies show up, how to cultivate a healthy balance of sensitivity and tolerance to distress, regulating and nurturing ourselves, and how to navigate relationships with others when they exhibit borderline tendencies. As a disclaimer, formal diagnosis of any condition should be done with a medical professional working directly with the person in question. This podcast episode is not a substitute for that. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: What are "borderline tendencies"? 6:50: 9 Symptoms of BPD 9:10: The what, why, and how of mental health 11:25: Childhood influences on borderline tendencies 15:05: Instability, impulsivity, and the drive for reassurance 25:00: Recognizing varying degrees of borderline patterns 27:00: Practical tips–regulation and nurturance 32:50: Boundaries, and avoiding spiraling 37:50: Acceptance, and the desire for change 40:35: Sensitivity and distress tolerance 45:00: What to do when you notice borderline tendencies in a relationship 51:00: Recognizing how much someone's nature is going to change 53:35: Treatability 54:50: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of the most important skills we can develop is learning how to learn–how to update old beliefs about ourselves, take in new information, and build psychological resources like courage, gratitude, and confidence. We have experiences from which we could potentially learn all the time, but how often are we able to actually implement lasting change from our positive experiences? On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson dive into Rick’s recently published study on our capacity for deliberate growth. We talk a bit about the neurological components of learning, how the study worked, and what the practical takeaways are to help us make learning stick. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Positive Neuroplasticity Training:  Learn how to change your brain for the better in the 6-part course from Rick his study was based on!  Use code BEWELL50 for $50 off the purchase price. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: The focus of Rick’s recently published study on how to learn 4:35: Our capacity for deliberate growth 7:30: How does learning work in the brain? 11:25: Activation and installation 16:00: Acknowledging the difficulty of deliberate change 16:55: The HEAL framework 22:15: How Rick’s study results were measured 30:05: The results of the study 39:10: Possibilities for future studies 42:00: Little moments of recognition 44:05: Takeaways 45:50: Assessing the whole notion of statistical significance 51:05: Control groups and clusters 54:05: Rick reads the final statement from the study. 56:05: Recap    Wednesday Meditation Group: Join Rick for his freely offered online weekly meditation, talk, and discussion. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.   Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When a child is particularly emotionally intelligent, and a parent is particularly emotionally vulnerable, an inversion of the typical relationship can occur where the child devotes themselves to meeting the parent’s needs rather than the other way around. This can lead the child to lose touch with their own wants and needs – with their authentic self – which then leads to underlying feelings of worthlessness, uncertainty, and self-alienation in adulthood. Extreme versions of this pattern are known as parentification, but mild to moderate versions are surprisingly common. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore how we can heal from the effects of these difficult early experiences and rediscover who we truly are.  This material was completely eye-opening for me, and it’s one of my favorite episodes we've ever produced. Want to learn more? Check out Alice Miller’s classic book The Drama of the Gifted Child. Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:55: Distinction between parentification and the gifted child 5:05: Serving a psychological function - what is the “gift” we’re talking about? 7:50: Self-definition vs. defining yourself through relationship 10:30: Examples of generational patterns 16:45: Accumulation of subtle forms of parentification over time 21:55: Patterns of interaction, and differentiation 24:00: Summary of material so far 27:00: “The manic defense against depression” 30:30: What can people do? 35:00: Love, aspiration, and power in parenting styles 40:20: Creating a coherent (and balanced) narrative 43:30: Seductive narratives, grief not shame, claiming your nature 51:25: What emotions were you permitted? 53:35: Recap Wednesday Meditation Group: Join Rick for his freely offered online weekly meditation, talk, and discussion. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

A little while ago, we had an episode on self-awareness where Rick emphasized how the majority of what people have to become self-aware of is the good inside themselves. The point felt significant enough to expand into a full episode about how to connect with our best parts. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson focus on how to accept, appreciate, and connect with our positive aspects, and how to deal with some of the developmental blocks that prevent us from embracing the good in ourselves. We look at how the culture we’re in affects our perspective, how to manage fears of conceit, and how to experience more intimacy and courage by releasing cynicism. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 3:20: What gets in the way of us hearing the good news about ourselves? 5:40: Stories we’re told about ourselves that form our identity10:45: Reconnecting with childhood positive qualities 17:10: Intentions, talents, efforts 23:25: Avoiding conceit and the fear of sounding conceited 30:40: Releasing ideas that human nature is fundamentally bad 34:25: Tribalism 36:35: Seeing the cultural water we swim in 41:15: Intimacy, cynicism, courage 46:40: Cherishing ourselves and others 47:35: Recap   Wednesday Meditation Group: Join Rick for his freely offered online weekly meditation, talk, and discussion. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.   Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) is the result of the slow accumulation of many small traumatic experiences over time. On our most popular Being Well episode to date, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explored the details of CPTSD with Pete Walker, and on today’s episode, Forrest is joined by his partner Elizabeth Ferreira to discuss the topic through a more personal lens. Elizabeth shares her CPTSD origin story, what CPTSD feels like, and how to create a compassionate environment with or without a therapist so you can safely process grief, experience out repressed emotions, and learn to express your needs. Check out Elizabeth's NEW PODCAST! About our Guest: Elizabeth is a recent graduate of the Somatic Psychology program at the California Institute of Integral Studies (CIIS), and is currently earning hours toward her MFT license. She creates content on YouTube and Instagram focused on CPTSD, PMDD, and becoming a more whole version of who you are. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:15: Elizabeth’s story 5:20: Trauma in the broader family system 8:40: A “normal” story 11:50: Loneliness, and the parts of us we leave behind 15:00: Repressed emotions 17:10: Adverse childhood experiences 20:35: Stepping out of adverse environments 25:15: Trauma work as grief work 29:10: Symptoms of Complex PTSD 34:50: How do you need to be comforted? 37:30: Creating the sense of safety 40:30: Somatic interventions 45:30: Being witnessed 47:10: Claiming your needs 50:10: Facing the dreaded experience 53:50: Accuracy vs. sensitivity 57:05: Hidden parts 1:00:00: Start by joining 1:04:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You might have heard the line “attachment is the root of suffering.” It comes from the Buddha, but you don’t have to be a Buddhist to recognize that becoming overly attached to a particular outcome, person, or view of yourself can lead to a lot of suffering. At the same time, there are clearly things that are sensible to be attached to – like our loved ones, a basic moral compass, and fundamentals like food and shelter. So, what’s the problem with attachment? On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss the problem with attachment, what differentiates healthy and unhealthy forms of attachment, and what we can do to relax attachment over time. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:10: Learning from Buddhism without trying to be a Buddhist 8:45: Two kinds of suffering 12:00: Distinguishing healthy desire and unhealthy desire 19:40: Markers of problematic attachments 24:10: Self-concept, and an example from Forrest of relaxing attachment  30:25: Balancing "Right View" and nonattachment 42:25: Pain and release 50:55: What’s useful for you? 55:45: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On one of our favorite episodes of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson are joined by author and therapist Terry Real to talk about how to overcome the myth of toxic individualism, break trauma cycles, and experience real intimacy in our relationships.  They discuss how to balance acceptance and agency, develop a healthy sense of trust and self-esteem, communicate what we want effectively, and experience our power through collaboration rather than dominance. Terry describes how we can move past the delusions of toxic individualism and patriarchy that plague our culture, moving away from ‘me vs. you’ and into Us. About our Guest: Terrence Real is an internationally recognized family therapist, speaker, and bestselling author. He is the founder of the Relational Life Institute, which offers workshops for couples as well as professional training for clinicians in his Relational Life Therapy (RLT) methodology. His latest book is Us: Getting Past You and Me to Build a More Loving Relationship which comes out June 7th. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Terry’s personal transformation 4:55: Regulating up to our parents 7:05: The Adaptive Child vs. the Wise Adult 14:25: Us vs. the delusions of individualism and patriarchy 18:05: Balancing acceptance and agency 22:45: Enlightened self-interest and working with couples 29:25: Three phases to get more of what you want in relationships without a counselor 33:35: How to support people–particularly women–in dealing with unfairness 37:15: Gendered tendencies–moving into intimacy and out of patriarchy 43:20: Shame and healthy self-esteem 49:40: Relational reckoning and relational integrity 56:55: Repairing trust and grandiosity 1:01:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When was the last time you went through a day without comparing yourself to anyone? For instance, by comparing your life to someone else’s highlight reel on social media, or being critical of your own willpower and abilities? Avoiding these mental traps can be difficult in a culture that emphasizes the importance of being 'special.' Of course, we are all special – and all ordinary. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson are joined by psychologist and author Dr. Ronald Siegel to discuss why that might not be such a bad thing. They discuss how to drop the myth of the extraordinary, how to heal from feelings of inadequacy, and what healthy self-esteem looks like. About our Guest: Dr. Siegel is Assistant Professor of Psychology at Harvard Medical School, international speaker on the topics of mindfulness and compassion, and author of several books including his latest, The Extraordinary Gift of Being Ordinary: Finding Happiness Right Where You Are. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:50: What prompted Ron’s inquiry into being ordinary 7:00: Cultural and evolutionary factors 12:55: Fluctuations in self-esteem based on success and failure 16:40: Social connection as antidote 18:35: What being ordinary looks like 20:45: Three ways to drop the myth of the extraordinary 31:35: Rick’s path to healing his own feelings of inadequacy 38:55: Predispositions to having a sense of worth and value 44:40: Love vs. ‘specialness’ 48:40: Reaping the benefits of self-esteem without getting caught in its traps 56:10: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Anger is one of the most complex, demanding, and difficult emotions we deal with on a regular basis, in part because it has both many costs and many uses. It burdens our bodies, relationships, and the world around us. And at the same time, there is a vital energy associated with anger that is extremely powerful and, when harnessed effectively, quite useful. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore the varied ways anger surfaces, how we can relate to it, and how in recognizing what it has to tell us we can channel its energy towards good ends. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:10: Framing anger relative to other emotions 6:15: The three poisons 12:20: Useful aspects of anger and issues with labeling it as bad 22:45: Repression and not downregulating others’ emotions 28:30: Treating anger with respect rather than fear 30:15: What supports us in healthily claiming anger? 38:00: Characteristics that can predispose people to be angry 39:40: The Empty Boat and recognizing anger as an affliction against onesself 43:10: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Self-awareness is both one of the most important skills for a person to have, and one of the most challenging to develop. In this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore what it takes to increase self-awareness over time, the different forms of awareness that come into play, and why maintaining self-awareness can be such a struggle. Rick then emphasizes how we can develop a greater awareness of the positive aspects of ourselves.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Rick’s observations of people’s self-awareness when beginning therapy  6:10: Distinguishing internal and external self-awareness 7:40: Different types of internal self-awareness 12:20: Why is it hard to become self-aware? 18:45: Positive discoveries and Forrest’s personal experience 29:05: The natural movement toward health and sanity 33:35: What causes us to lose touch with positive aspects of our nature? 42:45: How can we cultivate more self-awareness over time? 49:45: Questions to ask yourself 54:50: A creative exercise for mapping out parts of yourself 58:10: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at genomelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners. They explore how to deal with chronically negative people, managing avoidant tendencies that get in the way of us finding a great relationship, and separating normal desires for support from more problematic ones. They then talk about how we can build self-confidence and become more internally referenced, before closing the episode with a sticky situation involving supporting an aging parent.  If you’d like to send in a question to be answered on the podcast, join our Patreon or email us at contact@beingwellpodcast.com. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics:  0:00: Introduction 1:00: My friend is chronically negative, what can I do? 13:05: How can I move past a cycle of avoidance that’s inhibiting my ability to find a good relationship? 26:05: I want to be supported by my partner, but I’m worried about becoming enmeshed. How can I seek help in a healthy way? 39:30: How do I stop seeking validation from others? 45:20: How do I react to ongoing criticism from an aging parent? 58:15: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson open up the mailbag to explore a variety of listener questions. They talk about what causes our brains to become attached to unwanted habits, how to know which of your thoughts are worth listening to, and the pros and cons of saying "kind of." They then consider how to improve sibling relationships, and what to do with the positive emotions we experience during meditation. Have a question for us? Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes.Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Why do our brains keep us stuck on unwanted patterns or ways of thinking? 10:45: Three kinds of craving and the machinery of becoming 13:50: Why do we say “kind of” all the time? 25:50: How do you know which of your thoughts are worth listening to? 31:15: How do you improve a sibling relationship? 40:35: What do you do with positive emotions during meditation? 48:40: Recap Wednesday Night Meditation with Rick: https://www.rickhanson.net/teaching/wednesday-meditations-with-dr-rick-hanson/ Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We all have things we want to accomplish in life, but having goals or knowing we should be doing something is often not nearly enough to get us to actually sustain our efforts in getting where we want to go. Today on Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore how to optimize our motivation. They discuss the brain's dopamine system, and distinguish motivation from discipline and liking from wanting. They then explore how we can align the brain's underlying biological circuitry with our desires, so we can stay relaxed and engaged while achieving our goals. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Motivation vs. Discipline 5:30: Why don't we just want the things we know are good for us? 11:00: Creating unity between our biology and cognitive processing 15:50: Dopamine: An Overview 21:30: Distinguishing liking from wanting 25:35: Natural variations in dopamine metabolism 28:55: How people with lower levels of dopamine can stay motivated 33:35: Updating the reward value of your experiences 37:20: Being, doing, and having 43:05: What has helped Rick stay diligent and let go of resistance 46:40: Practical how-tos for interacting with the dopaminergic system  50:35: Letting fish be fish 52:30: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

With so much suffering going on in the world that’s worthy of our compassion and engagement, it’s easy to become overwhelmed by it even as we have the desire to remain engaged. Secondary traumatic stress is the stress we are exposed to when we interact with other people’s stress, and it manifests at both an individual and societal level. When not managed effectively, it wears us down and diminishes our ability to contribute in a positive way. On this episode of Being Well, Forrest talks with trauma expert Laura van Dernoot Lipsy about how we can better manage secondary traumatic stress, how to avoid burnout and overwhelm, and what it looks like to stay hopeful and live fully in the face of daunting societal challenges. About Our Guest: Laura van Dernoot Lipsky is the founder and director of The Trauma Stewardship Institute and author of Trauma Stewardship: An Everyday Guide to Caring for Self While Caring for Others and The Age of Overwhelm. She is a widely recognized pioneer in the field of trauma exposure and has worked locally, nationally, and internationally for more than three decades.  Laura is also the host of Future Tripping, a podcast about navigating overwhelm. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Laura’s personal experience 4:10: How secondary trauma shows up for people 6:45: Martyrdom and the responsibility of organizations to create sustainable environments 10:30: Concern with how trauma is normalized within communities 14:10: Internalized oppression and overwhelm in the broader culture 17:40: The broader systemic context and the ineffectiveness of burning yourself out 21:50: The necessity of taking breaks 26:40: How to feel okay taking time to unplug from discourse on charged topics 33:35: Differentiating between spheres of control and acknowledging grief 37:45: Finding ways to stay hopeful 40:35: What Laura is grateful for and stressed about 44:35: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s normal and healthy for us to try to process our experiences emotionally, but sometimes during that process we find ourselves getting stuck on the same painful memory, anxiety, or disturbing thought. This frustrating experience, known as rumination, is a common psychological challenge that is both discouraging and unhelpful. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson spell out what rumination is, where it comes from, and how it functions in the brain. They then explore what practices and strategies we can use to identify rumination when it comes up, and move through an obsessive thought compassionately and effectively. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:25: How do we define rumination? 7:45: What do we get out of rumination? 13:30: Distinguishing rumination from grieving 16:30: Where rumination comes from in people 18:40: The default mode network 22:30: Ways to disengage the default mode network  25:50: Strange attractors, Krishna, and the Gopis 30:35: Thought acceptance and noting 33:15: Recurring themes of your rumination 37:10: Novelty 38:45: Self-constructing invites rumination, self-acceptance undermines it 47:05: A quick walkthrough for dealing with a negative thought 53:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Make Woven Earth a part of your nightly routine, and use code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase of Single Products. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’ve spent a lot of time on the podcast exploring how we can improve our skills in romantic relationships, but for many people one of the most difficult parts of a relationship is getting into one in the first place.  On this episode, Forrest talks with Logan Ury, Director of Relationship Science at the dating app Hinge, about the psychology of dating. They explore chemistry, romance, apps, and how to reframe our self-limiting tendencies so we can find love that is fulfilling and brings out the best in us. About our Guest: Logan Ury is a behavioral scientist turned dating coach, and the author of  How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love. She is the Director of Relationship Science at the dating app Hinge, and former head of Google’s behavioral science team the Irrational Lab. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction   1:40: Why is modern dating so hard? 4:15: Romanticism 6:20: Being in a relationship for self-actualization 8:25: Romanticizers, Maximizers, and Hesitators 11:15: Reframes for the Romanticizer 14:20: What kind of shared qualities actually matter? 19:25: Reframes for the Maximizer 26:35: The tendency to externalize problems and avoid vulnerability 32:25: Reframes for the Hesitator 36:50: Information vs. emotion - appreciation for romance 41:05: Bids, and turning towards 43:05: What other things do people tend to underestimate in relationships? 47:20: The aspect of you that is brought out by your partner 48:45: How to use apps in more effective ways 51:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Visit Pendulumlife.com and use code BEINGWELL for 20% off your first month of membership. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson take a deep dive into defining stress, how it functions, how it impacts our lives and bodies, and what we can do to repair from its effects.  We discuss how to distinguish stress from effort, the influence of the modern world on how stressed we feel, the various biological mechanisms involved in stress, and the challenges presented by chronic exposure to it. We then consider what we can do to increase resilience, including positively responding to stressors even in the midst of limitations and uncertainty. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:50: What is stress exactly? 3:30: Distinguishing stress from effort 7:25: Circles of concern and what we can actually influence 10:15: Zebras, and different levels of allostatic load 15:30: How the Endocrine System and Nervous System respond to stress 21:45: The amygdala response 23:20: What are the costs of stress? 35:30: The story so far 36:25: How do we positively adapt to stress? 41:35: The influence of basic lifestyle factors 43:50: Questions to ask yourself 45:30: Claiming agency while accepting limitations and uncertainty 51:05: What we can do to repair from the effects of our stress 57:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at genomelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of the most effective ways to change how we show up in the world is to identify and change our underlying personal narrative. On this episode, Forrest Hanson talks with Ian Cron about how we can use the Enneagram personality typing system to aid us in this process. About our Guest: Ian Cron is a therapist, master Enneagram teacher, best-selling author of The Road Back to You and his latest The Story of You, and host of popular Enneagram podcast Typology. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:30: Ian’s narrative and how it has changed over time 5:45: Overview of the Enneagram and its uses 11:30: A few examples of common limiting narratives 19:10: A quick primer of how the Enneagram works and each type 26:00: How people can push back on their unconscious narratives 35:25: Cultivating awareness of how your old story is playing out in the present 37:10: Ian’s inflection point 41:30: Integration and levels of development 43:15: The link between your virtue and your fixation 49:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Try Splendid Spoon today and take meal-planning off your plate. Just go to SplendidSpoon.com/BEINGWELL for $50 off your first box Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at genomelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’ve talked on this show about lots of ways we can be happier over time, but one of the hardest things to do is to STAY happy as the events of life wash over us. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore "hedonic adaptation" - our tendency to return to a stable baseline of happiness - and discuss how we can get off the "hedonic treadmill."  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:25: What is hedonic adaptation? 6:25: Three factors of happiness 9:45: Survey of various research on hedonic adaptation and subjective well-being 19:55: Financial circumstances and relationships 27:35: How to sustain happiness - loving, knowing, growing 38:15: The single most effective intervention to fight hedonic adaptation 41:30: Forrest’s take on how lasting change happens 45:00: Antidote experiences and improving memory 47:50: Can we actually become happier? 51:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Visit athleticgreens.com/BEINGWELL to take ownership over your health, and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Take care of your long-term health, and get the probiotic rooted in the latest microbiome science from Pendulum. Visit pendulumlife.com and use code BEINGWELL for 20% off your first month of membership. Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at genomelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of the underlying threads that runs through many of our conversations on Being Well is our relationship with our “self”. On this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson talk with neuroscientist, mindfulness researcher, and bestselling author Dr. Jud Brewer about where we can find the “self” in the brain, and the benefits of relaxing our attachment to it. About our Guest: Dr. Jud Brewer is the Director of Research and Innovation at the Mindfulness Center and associate professor in Behavioral and Social Sciences at the School of Public Health and Psychiatry at the School of Medicine at Brown University. He is the executive medical director of behavioral health at Sharecare, and a research affiliate at MIT. His bestselling books include Unwinding Anxiety and The Craving Mind. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: What is a “self”? 5:10: Distinguishing consciousness, person, and self 7:25: Can there be a unified sense of self in an everchanging psychological process? 11:50: Selfing and what triggers a sense of “me” 15:20: Evolutionary speculations about the origins of selfing 18:50: Predictive processing and personal associations 21:55: How Jud responds to selfing 28:10: The unicorn metaphor of self and relief in sensory experience 36:45: The experience of addiction and anxiety 40:50: Somatic markers and distinguishing healthy vs. unhealthy desires 41:40: Letting go vs. straining to create a self 45:40: Underlying neurological components of the self 56:30: The fluidity of awareness without self 58:30: When and how does the default mode network become functional? 1:03:00: Neuro-psychedelic research and unlearning 1:07:15: Having a self vs. taking ourselves personally 1:11:00: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Visit athleticgreens.com/BEINGWELL to take ownership over your health, and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at genomelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The tone of this episode of Being Well is a bit different. For context, we recorded it four days after the Russian invasion of Ukraine.  It feels like we've had more than our fair share of difficult times over the last few years. Like many people, we wish there were more we could do to support those suffering around the world. Today Dr. Rick and Forrest focus on what we can do, in our mind and in our lives, to relate to the challenging emotions – fear, grief, anxiety, anger, helplessness, and so on – that naturally arise during these times.  The advertising revenue from this episode will be donated to charities dedicated to supporting the people of Ukraine. If you'd like to join us in donating, we’ve included links below to several charities. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 5:10: Anxiety calming exercise 12:40: Pause 18:55: Feel your feelings 23:45: Resource yourself 26:45: Compassion 29:55: Humor 32:00: Get educated 40:35: Make a plan 45:55: Move into action 52:35: Recap Make a donation to support Ukraine via one of the charities below:CARE's Ukraine Crisis Fund United Help Ukraine Global Giving Ukraine Fund Rescue.org A list of charities by subject for supporting the people of Ukraine.   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Visit athleticgreens.com/BEINGWELL to take ownership over your health, and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at genomelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Forrest and Dr. Rick explore “manifesting:” the idea that our thoughts impact the world around us, and by changing those thoughts we can change our lives. Talking about manifesting is complicated, because on the one hand our thoughts really do matter. On the other, manifesting is closely tied to a small mountain of problematic pseudoscience. They discuss and debate some of the issues with manifesting and the law of attraction before focusing on how to apply key psychological principles to create the life you want.  Rick and Forrest talk about creating clarity around our goals, setting intentions, improving self-worth and self-efficacy, and overcoming some of the negative unconscious beliefs that can get in our way, before exploring authenticity, consistent effort, and working with fear and inhibition. Then Rick closes the episode by walking us through a practical example of how to change a belief. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 3:00: Defining manifestation, and separating psychological and supernatural mechanisms of action 6:55: The mind-body connection, and the psychological aspects of manifesting 15:50: Charlatanism, preying on uncertainty, and the problems with the law of attraction 25:20: Changing behavior vs. changing thoughts, and the lure of the supernatural 32:10: If you want to skip the context, start here. 32:35: Getting what we subconsciously believe we are worthy of, and “don’t know” mind 38:50: Identifying wants, surrendering to the best within us, and using pain as a guide 48:55: Embracing the reality of consistent effort 54:55: How to change a negative belief 1:08:10: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One of the most important skills we can develop is the ability to deal with disappointment and cope with failures big and small. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss what it looks like to experience failure not as falling short, but as an opportunity for growth. They explore cultural narratives around "failure," individual variation in sensitivity, and how to manage the pain of failure, adapt expectations, and develop systems of feedback to allow for a greater sense of ease and purpose. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: What do we mean by failure? 5:55: How loss works in the brain and what makes us sensitive to losing 8:30: Managing expectations of success 10:30: Attributional styles 13:10: How some can handle failure with greater ease than others 22:30: Deconstructing old narratives and failure as an opportunity for learning 28:30: Managing the pain of failure and setting up feedback systems 34:20: An example from Forrest’s experience 38:20: Poor decisions, lack of foresight, losing your nerve 40:30: Willingness to take risks 45:00: Defining our notion of success and failure via process vs. outcome 48:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Visit athleticgreens.com/BEINGWELL to take ownership over your health, and pick up the ultimate daily nutritional insurance! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Discover your full genetic potential by uploading your existing DNA test results at gemonelink.io. No trial period, no credit card, and no hidden fees! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

There’s a tension we’ve all felt at some point between the benefits of conformity and the desire to be true to ourselves and stand up for what we think is right. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson are joined by Dr. Todd Kashdan to explore how we can combine prosocial values with principled insubordination, so we can speak up for others (and ourselves) and maximize our chances of creating meaningful change even in the face of social pressure. About Our Guest: Dr. Todd Kashdan is Professor of Psychology at George Mason University. He is a leading authority on well-being, curiosity, psychological flexibility, and resilience. He has published over 210 peer-reviewed articles, and is the author of several books including Curious? , The Upside of Your Dark Side, and most recently The Art of Insubordination: How to Dissent and Defy Effectively. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Combining skillful positivity and dissent 7:55: Distinguishing principled insubordination and generic misanthropy 10:05: Four elements of principled insubordination 19:05: Yin and Yang applied to insubordination 21:35: Safe havens and a secure base 26:20: How capable are we of cultivating self-awareness? 32:05: Positive intent, courage, and sitting with discomfort 38:45: Strategies for being a moral and effective dissident 46:40: Navigating societal hierarchies 51:50: Process comments as insubordination 53:00: What Todd does when his kids are insubordinate 58:05: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes.   Sponsors: From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We explore a lot of big ideas on this show, and alongside them a lot of specific tactics and frameworks that can support people in growing and changing for the better. This includes everything from how to get the most out of therapy, to how to deal with traumatic experiences, to how to manage a variety of psychological conditions and individual tendencies. There’s a question that underlies all of these domains: how does personal healing actually work? On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss the fundamental strategies that allow us to become aware of and integrate all parts of ourselves–those we want to celebrate and expand, and those we’d like to heal and change. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 3:00: Overview of psychological patterns related to healing 7:25: Forrest’s personal journey as a case study 13:15: Rick assessing Forrest’s narrative from a psychologist’s perspective 15:45: Cognizing and other stories we tell to avoid parts of ourselves 20:40: Showing appreciation for our defenses, completing patterns 26:50: Catharsis and ways to reach it 39:15: Practical ways to reclaim and reconnect with parts of yourself 43:45: Playing with the nature of identity/ego 47:00: Self-forgiveness and celebrating what you’re good at 50:05: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes. Sponsors: Get the probiotic rooted in the latest microbiome science from Pendulum, and use code BEINGWELL for 20% off your purchase. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’re incredibly lucky to have such an engaged and interested group of people listening to the podcast, and because of that we regularly receive a lot of interesting questions via email and social media (links below). On today’s episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson dive into a few of these questions, discussing topics such as: how to manage family relationships, principles for approaching life’s changes, and what kind of therapy Rick actually practices. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: Bringing up challenges with family when times are already hard. 11:25: What kind of therapy does Rick practice? 19:15: Taking financial risks to experience life vs. creating financial security 30:00: “Neurons that fire together wire together” explained 34:05: Developing a connection with your inner child/younger self if your childhood was filled with painful experiences 41:40: Managing challenges between your family and your partner 54:15: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Have a question for us?  Email: contact@beingwellpodcast.com to submit questions or potential topics you'd like us to explore in future episodes.   Sponsors: Find the new CBD+ performance gummies and the whole dosist health line-up today at dosisthealth.com. Use promo code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kaira Jewel Lingo, a former Buddhist nun at the Plum Village community under the guidance of Thich Naht Han, joins Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson to explore how we can cultivate trust and equanimity in the face of uncertainty. They discuss the somatic experience of opening to the unknown, taking action as an antidote to anxiety, and how to have equanimity both when things work out...and when they don’t. About our Guest: Kaira Jewel Lingo is a Buddhist teacher who weaves mindfulness and meditation practice with social justice. At the age of 25, she became a Buddhist nun at the Plum Village community in France under the guidance of Thich Naht Han, where she stayed for 15 years. She became a Zen teacher in 2007, and is also a teacher in the Vipassana/Insight tradition through Spirit Rock Meditation Center. Finally, she is the author of We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons for Moving Through Change, Loss, and Disruption. Recording Note: This episode was recorded before the passing of Thich Naht Han. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Kaira Jewel’s background 2:35: Trust in times of major change 9:10: Two kinds of uncertainty 14:10: Store consciousness and trusting the unknown 18:50: Somatic contraction and expansion 23:05: Responding to the truth of suffering with joyful engagement 30:50: Practicing equanimity 42:10: Defining equanimity 43:30: How to return to center in unstable moments 48:20: Body-based equanimity exercise 50:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Find the new CBD+ performance gummies and the whole dosist health line-up today at dosisthealth.com. Use promo code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

So many forces in our brains, bodies, and culture move us toward the experience of scarcity – that something is missing, that we don’t have enough, and that we never will have enough. The feeling of scarcity both feels bad in itself, and is also the creator and amplifier of so many other challenges we face.  On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson talk about what a scarcity and an abundance mindset is, what some sources of scarcity are, and how we can move to an authentic experience of abundance. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:35: Defining scarcity and abundance  6:45: Why are we biologically predisposed towards scarcity? 17:05: When to relax and expand 20:20: Scarcity at the cultural level 26:20: Critique of promoting an “abundance mindset” and a practical definition 30:45: Orienting to a sense of abundance  38:05: Motivating with punishment vs reward 40:55: Abundance in objectively difficult times 47:15: Specific ways to shift from scarcity to abundance 58:45: A sense of wonder and groundedness 1:01:25: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Find the new CBD+ performance gummies and the whole dosist health line-up today at dosisthealth.com. Use promo code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most people abandon their New Year's Resolutions by mid-January. This often occurs because people make resolutions based on what they feel like they should want, rather than what they actually do want. In other words, their goals and resolutions aren’t in alignment with their purpose. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss how we can identify and pursue our purpose, and why it’s so valuable to have one in the first place. They explore questions and strategies that can help us develop clarity on what we find meaningful, what our core values are, and how we’d like to spend our time. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 3:00: Why spend time discussing how to have a purpose? 11:00: Nonverbal ways to establish yourself in your purpose 12:50: Ways to be flexible that make purpose accessible 17:45: Fresh starts help us retain freedom in the present 21:20: How to listen to yourself when it's unclear what you want 26:05: Getting feedback from others and abandoning doomed pursuits 32:10: Moving past the inner critic and fear of letting others down 38:10: Five questions to ask yourself 48:15: Soul work and sacredness 50:30: Doing what helps you look at things differently 54:10: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Find the new CBD+ performance gummies and the whole dosist health line-up today at dosisthealth.com. Use promo code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson are joined by James Baraz, a meditation teacher for over 40 years and cofounder of Spirit Rock Meditation Center, to explore how we can find still find joy during difficult times. We discuss how to balance a sense of equanimity with compassion for the suffering of the world, and how cultivating joy at an individual level can support healing at the collective level. About our Guest: James is the coauthor of Awakening Joy: 10 Steps to True Happiness, and leads the popular online course of the same name. He is also the guiding teacher of One Earth Sangha, a website devoted to expressing a Buddhist response to climate change. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Why joy is important in Buddhism 5:05: James’ journey to prioritizing joy 11:40: How to practice awakening joy without turning away from suffering 17:20: Putting yourself back together after cultivating awareness of suffering 24:10: The 10 Steps of Awakening Joy 28:45: How people can use emotionally positive states in contemplative practice 32:00: Positivity in relation to the climate crisis and other collective challenges 38:05: Equanimity, compassion, including both sides of the river 43:35: The great perfection 47:10: James’ realistic hope for the next 25 years  49:30: Recap Awakening Joy: Awakening Joy is an internationally recognized course designed to awaken joy through exciting themes and practices that incline the mind toward well-being and deeper insight. It's a 5-month course taught online by James, check it out and learn more here.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Find the new CBD+ performance gummies and the whole dosist health line-up today at dosisthealth.com. Use promo code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson talk with Dr. Zindel Segal about Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), an eight-week group therapy program designed to help those who suffer from chronic unhappiness and prevent relapse after episodes of severe clinical depression. About our Guest: Dr. Segal is a Professor of Psychology at the University of Toronto at Scarborough, and one of the creators of MBCT. He specializes in mood disorders, particularly depression, and has had an enormous influence on the clinical adoption of mindfulness-based practices and their addition to more traditional forms of cognitive therapy. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:00: Origins of MBCT 4:30: Why Segal prioritized studying mindfulness as an intervention to depression 7:10: Comparing MBCT with traditional CBT 10:20: What about depression makes us more reactive to thoughts and feelings? 13:15: Mindfulness of sadness vs direct experience 18:35: MBCT practices explained 23:10: Three minute breathing space exercise 31:00: Attentional control training 33:45: Managing feelings of inadequacy 39:00: Motivation and implicit compassion 43:15: Ongoing practices after the MBCT course 45:45: Creating access to mindfulness resources 48:15: Recap From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson reflect on 2021, and explore how to maximize what we get out of 2022. We discuss how to rest in our aspirations, claim identity-based change, reframe personal narratives, and form the habits that lead to a more grounded, meaningful life. Thank you for listening over the last year, looking forward to much more! Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:20: How was 2021 for you? 5:35: Gratitude for listener support 8:25: Rick’s yearly reflection process 12:45: Collaging practice 18:35: Language, and keeping a positive orientation toward desires and resolutions 26:55: Sentence completion exercise 31:10: Identity-based change 35:25: Rick’s approach to nature-based change 39:30: Reframing personal narratives 43:35: Making room for new parts of yourself in middle age 46:10: Process for forming resolutions outlined. 53:35: Rick and Forrest’s goals for 2022 58:05: Drawing on the support of others 59:30: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest discuss the “flight” response to stress, which includes feelings of anxiety and fear, avoidant behavior, and an underlying sense of insecurity. They explore the emotions and behaviors associated with the flight response, and how we can build up a stronger, more secure sense of who we are. Rick shares some practical tools that will help you change your self-concept, safely apply principles from graduated exposure, and feel safer from the inside-out. I’ve loved this series on the stress responses, and think you’ll get a lot out of this episode. You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:00: The purpose of the flight response, and when it is and isn’t useful 5:35: Social withdrawal, conflict avoidance, and preserving safety vs. comfort 12:15: The trouble with low likelihood, high-cost risks 16:35: Exploring our capacity for stress, and identifying the risks worth taking 26:30: Feeling “sturdy,” and why we choose the flight response vs. other stress responses 33:30: Graduated exposure  39:05: Learning to trust our new capabilities as we change 44:50: Overdoing a change as a form of self-sabotage, and reserving the power to flee 54:25: Responding to anxiety 1:01:40: Being present with painful situations we can’t escape 1:08:40: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there.  Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! If you’re navigating something messy, call The Dr. John Delony Show. Dr. John shares practical advice on how to connect with people, face depression, overcome anxiety, and learn what it means to be well. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.  Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co.  Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’ve received a substantial number of questions from our listeners regarding familial estrangement: when one family member distances themselves from the others, or chooses not to interact with them at all. It’s a common and extremely challenging situation, and the pain related to it can be particularly intense during the holidays.Today on Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss family estrangement, particularly between parents and children, and how the questions we engage in this territory apply more broadly to how we balance our own boundaries with the responsibilities we have toward other people. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Our holiday sale is going on now, and podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25  for another 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 3:05: Our framework for discussing estrangement in this episode 6:10: Joining and distancing 9:40: Duties in relationship between children and aging parents 15:35: Parents’ behavior then vs. now 19:00: Distinguishing family systems from parents as individuals 24:10: Functional forgiveness when someone doesn’t show remorse 26:45: Choosing the kind of relationship we want to have 31:45: Parents’ pain when children distance 33:40: How parents can consider the child’s perspective 39:40: Grieving an estranged relationship internally 45:30: Approaches to interacting with estranged children 52:30: How to decide whether or not to engage in a relationship 55:10: Awareness of cultural influences 57:20: Ownership and what parents can do to repair 1:03:00: The wide range of variables influencing family relationships 1:07:00: Wishing well regardless of circumstances 1:09:30: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson expand their conversation focused on finding a long-term partner to include what traits to look for, and how to navigate early sticking points. They discuss life growth curves, how to manage early conflict, healthy approaches for dealing with rejection, and how to support those still navigating a difficult search. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Our holiday sale is going on now, and podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25  for another 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:45: Green and red flags to look for in a partner 8:50: Pursuer-distancer dynamic 9:45: Shared growth curves--relationship as a process, not a person 12:50: Riding the river of practical daily life 19:25: Someone who brings out the best parts of you  25:25: Different kinds of romantic relationships 28:55: Rejection and feeling wanted 30:45: Asymmetry and power dynamics 34:40: Agency within the pain of rejection 40:05: Recognizing self-worth 45:00: Managing early conflict 51:50: The struggle to find a prospective partner 59:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Check out Woven Earth's line of sleep-supporting CBD products!  Use code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off the purchase price of any of their products. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’ve spent a lot of time on Being Well discussing how to improve our relationships - how to navigate conflict effectively, communicate more skillfully, and create a romantic relationship that’s truly fulfilling - but we’ve spent very little time talking about how to get into one of those relationships in the first place. Today, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson talk about how to maximize your chances of finding a fulfilling long-term relationship. They explore how to develop a clear intention of what you want, the key psychological skills that invite a healthy relationship, and how to market yourself authentically while dating. From Dr. Hanson: The Foundations of Well-Being brings together the lessons of a lifetime of practice into one year-long online program. Our holiday sale is going on now, and podcast listeners can use the code BEINGWELL25  for another 25% off! Please don't hesitate to apply for a scholarship if you're in need.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: What supports people in finding a long-term partner? 4:35: Having a clear intention 8:45: Psychological skills to maximize our chances of finding a long-term relationship 12:15: Marketing and sorting through suspects 14:40: Intention expanded 22:15: Psychological skills expanded 22:50: A healthy sense of self worth 26:10: Being aware of your selection biases 29:35: Communication skills 34:30: Seeing the best in one another 37:30: Settling anxious and avoidant tendencies 42:00: Resting in presence with someone 43:15: Not letting the perfect be the enemy of the good 44:25: Marketing explained 55:00: Authenticity 58:20: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Find the new CBD+ performance gummies and the whole dosist health line-up today at dosisthealth.com. Use promo code BEINGWELL20 for 20% off your purchase.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!  Want to sleep better? Try the legendary Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices