S4E17: Falcon Manifesto

Psst Hey kid, you an elbow vegan? Well don't worry any longer, because starting today, we have a solution for you! It's BeyondWenus. Tastes just like real wenus, but made entirely from discarded Baywatch plot points

Morgan's Rating: 4
Michael's Rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @14:06. Post-episode discussion starts @01:14:38.

Assorted show notes:

@06:32 Michael forgot he made a movie in college too. That brings the count up to 4.

@12:55 A Geocities interview with Jacqueline Collen.

@24:32 Please do not Google "Sonic Inflation" on a work computer.

@36:40 The Dahir Insaat Earthquake Bed.

@01:26:40 Peacock's Insane Christmas Movies.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E16: Mirror, Mirror

Well I suppose it's time we finally tell you. Michael and Morgan are actually the same person. In case you haven't figured it out, Morgan is obviously the horny twin and Michael is the research twin.

Eric's Rating: 6
Morgan's Rating: 7
Michael's Rating: 7

Episode discussion starts @24:13. Post-episode discussion starts @01:28:11.

Assorted show notes:

@48:09 A reminder of what the octopus looked like

@01:34:52 The Oreo burger

@01:35:22 The banana pizza

@01:36:01 Eric says that they don't eat the cannibal sandwich in Wisconsin but this twitter account begs to differ

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E7: Tentacles Pt. 2

Well in theory this is a part 2, but let's be honest. It's not. The only thing that connects these episodes is the return of Helen! You gotta know when to Holden, you gotta know when to float 'em (the answer is don't float them because that's how you get the bends)

Helen's Rating: 4
Michael's Rating: 5
Michael's Racoon Rating: 1
Morgan's Rating: 4

Find Helen at the Falling in Love Montage Podcast
Helen's Twitter: @helenherbstl

Episode discussion starts @12:10. Post-episode discussion starts @01:12:40.

Assorted show notes:

@14:57 The album art for the Sun 60 album this is from

@17:45 You're Gone by Samantha Ryan

@52:55 Okay so maybe not a kid but he does look weird

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E6: Tentacles Pt. 1
CW: ED/bulimia discussion

Remember kids, never get a Goku cake, never get someone a book for their birthday, never go surfing without a leash, and definitely never try to cure your bulimia by almost getting eaten by an octopus.

Why doesn't Star Wars have octopus aliens? 8 arms 8 lightsabers George Lucas call us.

Helen's Rating: 5
Morgan's Rating: 6
Michael's Rating: 6

Find Helen at the Falling in Love Montage Podcast
Helen's Twitter: @helenherbstl

Episode discussion begins @11:04. Post-episode discussion begins @01:23:30.

Assorted Show Notes:

@28:46 This is shot that made Helen and Michael burst out in laughter

@29:02 Here's a shot of the octopus's face

@29:10 The trifecta of octopus shots

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E5: Sky Rider

This episode is just so full of hot air. Hot air balloons that is! Well, just one balloon, but it's in here like a lot.

Sparkle's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 5
Morgan's Rating: 6

Episode discussion starts @16:25. Post-episode discussion starts @01:47:00.

Assorted show notes:

@54:45 Telly Savalas beach photos 1, 2, and 3

@01:35:45 Bill Pickett picture

@01:43:24 VENGEANCE THE SHARK

@01:51:28 The Nathan Fielder related tweet

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

 S4E4: Blindside

Oops all Pelicans. Have you pet a pelican recently? Some of them are cops and we don't endorse those birds. Fuck those birds. Like Zeus would.

Reeves's Rating: 1.5
Michael's Rating: 4
Morgan's Rating: 4

Please check out Reeves at KEXP.org!

Episode discussions starts @33:06. Post-episode discussion starts @01:57:18.

Assorted show notes:

@16:44 Pictures of Giant Gonzalez's suit, #1 and #2

@23:14 Dave Meltzer's horrifying room

@33:35 Michael forgot to record it but luckily he pretty much perfectly replicated his voice in his impression

@47:39 Here is the video of Fraiser as The National Morgan was looking for

@59:00 Okay so not on every action but there's a decent amount of farting!

@01:17:30 Here is the shirt on Etsy. But here is where you can actually buy it

@01:19:09 Morgan no

@01:23:05 "I'm gonna murder this child"

@02:02:29 The Garfield cup drama

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose. 

S4E3: Lover's Cove

In this very special episode, Michael and Morgan have been taken out of commission by a purple jellyfish, so we have to bring in some help to continue on with our mission.

Stay tuned for our upcoming Disney+ Deal.

Robert's rating: 6
Valerie's rating: 2
Jami's rating: 6

Episode discussion starts @7:22. Post-episode discussion starts @36:01.

Assorted show notes:

@00:51 We're being held against our will. Send help

@12:40 This scene is reused from season 2 episode 11 "If Looks Could Kill"

@24:24 As much as we would like to skool these NEWBS, they are correct that CJ and Mitch have not dated previously. Good job guest hosts!

@37:07 Michael and Morgan do not condone slander of Hobie 2

@42:52 Michael and Morgan do not condone promotion of the band U2

@44:56 We're being held against our will. Send help

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E2: Race Against Time Part 2

Baywatch is the Koo-Koo-Kookiest
Baywatch is the Ki-Ki-Kickiest
Baywatch is the Groo-Groo-Grooviest
Baywatch is the living end, friend

Join our watch along of Lidsville episode 1 here!

Morgan's Rating: 2
Michael's Rating: 2
Morgan's Lidsville Rating: 9
Michael's Lidsville Rating: 9

Episode discussion starts @03:14. Post-episode discussion starts @29:57. Lidsville episode discussion starts @46:06. Post-Lidsville discussion starts @01:13:34.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E1: Race Against Time Part 1. Welcome to season 4! Can you believe it? We can't. It's a part one, which famously has always gone very well on Baywatch.

Morgan's Rating: 6.5
Michael's Rating: 7

Episode discussion starts @21:00. Post-episode discussion starts @01:28:52.

Assorted show notes:

@59:39 Iconic Thomas brand English Muffins

@01:00:33 KAPSALON

@01:16:32 Andrew said it checks out

@01:35:02 You'll have to see the tweet to truly appreciate it

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E22: Fatal Exchange. Can you believe it? We've finished season 3! Overall, it's been a season of ups and downs, but at least it's not season 2. The blood feud has escalated, Morgan's mom, you're on watch 👀

We both recommend that you watch Pam and Tommy if you like our podcast and want more info about Pam Anderson. Also if you don't like our podcast, why have you listened this far?

Morgan's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 5

Episode discussion starts @15:54. Post-episode discussion starts @01:28:26.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E21: Kicks. Join us for a history lesson on wrestling and jello. Gene LaBell is here to save us from being stuck in Gene LaHell. The saga of Pilates continues, as we can never escape this curse.

Paul's Rating: 8
Michael's Rating: 8
Morgan's Rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @24:31. Post-episode discussion starts @01:30:34.

Assorted show notes:

@22:41 If you like hearing about the history of mixed martial arts, this video by Secret Base is a fantastic watch

@46:45 We forgot to mention that Pam Anderson is Canadian so it's all sorts of geopolitically confusing

@54:47 Please worry for Michael

@01:21:57 Here is the Pastamania menu, BROTHER

@01:22:50 Hulk Hogan shaped pasta, BROTHER

@01:25:35 A pasta sandwich. As well, here is an assorted album of other spaghetti pics

@01:27:11 Paul claims this is a meatball sub. He's not seeing the bigger picture

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E20: Shattered Pt. 2. It's part 2! And once again we have brought back our guest from episode 1. Just like part 1, part 2 is bad. Join us for an exploration of the GCU (Grandpa Cinematic Universe) and discuss if we prefer our grandpas Dirty, Bad, or Warred On.

This is a Milpo Sclint stan podcast #JusticeForMilpo.

Reeves' Rating: 11/3
Michael's Rating: 8/3
Morgan's Rating: 4

See Reeves' KEXP profile, along with his socials, here!

Episode discussion starts @12:11. Post-episode discussion starts @01:51:27.

@08:33 An extremely cursed image

@19:20 The Google ad for searching Candy Corn

@20:15 A tweet that captures Morgan's heart

@53:10 Please view the visage of this man

@53:44 An album of Milpo

@54:24 "No more shitposting or schizoposting, time for Sclintposting. Post this image to instantly sclintpill yourself"

@54:34 "everybody loves to powerscale anime characters but i dont see anyone talking about if milpo sclint would have survived on the eastern front"

@1:40:19 "What about this picture?" Michael says he had to pick between that and: this one

@01:48:28 A screenshot of Mitch's party

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E15: Coronado del Soul Part 2

If there's horny ghosts, in your neighborhood. Who you gonna call? Baywatchers!

Parker's Rating: 1.5
Morgan's Rating: 2
Michael's Rating: 2

Episode discussion starts @06:47. Post-episode discussion starts @01:09:56.

Assorted show notes:

@01:17:03 The tweet in question

@01:17:25 The recorded follow-up to that tweet

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E19: Shattered Pt. 1. In which we discuss the appropriate amount of ham for a lifeguard for our least kosher episode yet. Also lots of wrestling talk, we're sorry.

Reeves' Rating: 2
Michael's Rating: 3
Morgan's Rating: 3

Episode discussion starts @35:06. Post-episode discussion starts @2:09:12.

Assorted Show Notes:

@01:15:56 Here is the picture of the senior home and the belly dancer

@01:16:28 Morgan's horrifying picture

@01:17:05 The terrifying hallway

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E18: Stakeout at Surfrider Beach.

On this episode we ask the all important question, who directs the directors? Join us for our sendoff of Guido. We will never forget the iduido of you.

As well, we disprove a previous statement made on this podcast that there "is no Baywatch hentai". Jon found it for us.

Morgan's Rating: 7
Michael's Rating: 7
Jon's Rating: 8

Check out Jon's portfolio at: https://kawaiiguy.com/ and watch their Twitch streams at: https://www.twitch.tv/kawaiiguy.

Episode discussion starts @29:05. Post-episode discussion starts @01:47:27.

Assorted show notes:

@14:00 The picture of Darin Heams shared with Jon

@1:02:38 Here is the article that Jon is reading from regarding Hasslehoff's chicken legs

@01:24:38 Here is "The Guido Face"

@01:56:33 I present to you Baywatch Hentai. Image #1. Image #2. Image #3.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E17: The Tower.

This is the buried secret of Baywatch. In our most M. Night Shyamalan episode, we talk about the right amount of ham for a Baywatch episode.

Did you know how many surf terms could be a euphemism for sex? We try to figure out the answer to this age old question.

Who guards the lifeguard's life when the lifguard's life needs guarding? Hmmm?

Morgan's Rating: 9
Michael's Rating: 3

Episode discussion starts @06:54. Post-episode discussion starts @59:23.

Assorted show notes:

@37:16 The image Michael is looking for is the artwork for this episode!

@41:15 I highly encourage you to go on your own Google Image search for this because you'll find some pretty great stuff

@41:51 https://www.cinemablend.com/superheroes/batman/someone-added-jim-carreys-riddler-to-the-batman-trailer-and-i-cant-look-away

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E16: Vacation Part 2

We're back! It's our first time having a guest return for part 2 and it's a delight. We talk about the dangers of gambling and how badly the 90s handled the concept of addiction.
Also if anyone has a hookup on a thermos of Sweet and Sour sauce, tweet at us

Episode discussion starts at 20:00
Post episode discussion starts at 1:22:10

Val: 8
Morgan: 2
Michael: 3.5

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E15: Vacation Part 1. This is a real Sophie's Choice of an episode. Watch more montages or spend less time watching this episode? Norwegian Cruises sponsored a two-part-er and let me tell you, this is no pleasure cruise

Valerie's Rating: 7
Michael's Rating: 3
Morgan's Rating: 3

Episode discussion starts @30:01. Post-episode discussion starts @ 01:40:07.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E14: Strangers Among Us. This episode rocks, Rock's Hudson that is. If you're listening to this episode, you've got some real strange bedfellows. Unfortunately we are not cut out to be diamond thieves, but at least we have this podcast.

If you want to see Michael's attempt at flipping text, click here https://prnt.sc/26cbl5g

Morgan's Rating: 4
Michael's Rating: 5

Episode discussion starts @11:13. Post-episode discussion starts @19:57.

Assorted show notes:

@02:55 The first ugly Christmas sweater Michael found

@03:51 The second ugly Christmas sweater Michael found

@45:31 Please refer to Michael's attempt at flipping text above

@55:29 See-Saw Love

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E13: Island of Romance. It's a back-to-back record so we are on one this episode. Some real season 2 racism in this one, but at least we discover that Baywatch is Feminist Actually. This episode was so bad.

Morgan's Rating: 1
Michael's Rating: 1

Episode discussion starts @11:59. Post-episode discussion starts @54:38.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E12: A Matter of Life and Death.  Hot take, Baywatch is better than Doctor Who. David Hasselhoff, you're on notice. Start streaming Fortnite!! This one has some secret content, so listen carefully.

Episode discussion begins @9:58
Episode discussion ends @1:11:13

Morgan's Rating: 8
Michael's Rating: 8

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3E11: Dead of Summer. Life Pro Tip: Grunge voice hurts your throat if you aren't singing it correctly. Please join us as we discuss punctuation in band names, nu metal, and just generally avoid talking about the episode.

Morgan's Rating: 6
Michael's Rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @14:27. Post-episode discussion starts @01:09:44.

Assorted show notes:

@13:50 Here is the poster for Return of the Roller Blade Seven.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E10: Lifeguards Can't Jump. Baywatch. Basketball. ARGs. What do these all have in common? Better listen to the episode to find out!

We're bringing you the premium 90s nightclub experience this episode. Loud music, plastic ferns, and combination fast food restaurants.

Morgan's Rating: 2
Michael's Rating: 2

Episode discussions starts @10:36. Post-episode discussion starts @01:20:25.

Assorted show notes:

@1:03:50 This video covers the entire history of The Slipnutz.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E14: Coronado del Soul Pt. 1

Beef boys! Exciting news! We're hosting our first Baywatch Rookie School Con at the Coronado del Soul. In order to register, you just need to become a ghost and buy tickets from the spooooooky gift shop. Don't worry, this gift shop does have an exit

Parker's Rating: 4
Morgan's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 6

Episode discussion starts @27:11. Post-episode discussion starts @01:36:04.

Assorted show notes:

@49:53 Said montage.

@50:51 Here is the debut. As well, here is the peak.

@01:11:03 Morgan's choice.

@01:11:27 Parker's choice.

@01:12:05 Michael's choice.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E9: Masquerade. Please join us for a real paraclete of an episode. We once again discuss how everyone has been on Jake and the Fatman. We will never be free.
Also this is the episode where we buy a yacht, finally

Homecoming's Rating: 4
Morgan's Rating: 8
Michael's Rating: 7

Check out Homecoming on his theater podcast the BrodwayBesties.
As well, see Homecoming's written works on his blog.
And Homecoming has a video game podcast as well!

Episode discussion starts @24:00. Post-episode discussion starts @01:45:10.

@01:08:10 Hulk Hogan has to admit in court he does not have a 10 inch penis.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E8: Prince of Tides.

Better watch out Beef Boys! Jake and the Fatman is back! This episode sounds so good because we got a new CPU (ChiPotle cinematic Universe). We expand on our most famous prank (HubHub) and Michael learns an important lesson.

Helen's Rating: 3
Morgan's Rating: 7
Michael's Rating: 7

Helen's Falling in Love Montage Podcast
Helen's Twitter: @helenherbstl

Episode discussion starts @23:02. Post-episode discussion starts @01:37:55.

Assorted show notes:

@16:33 Michael and Morgan basically had this exact same conversation again on 11/28 in person, forgetting that they had already had this conversation before.

@36:57 Michael is referring to "The Texas-Jerusalem Crossroads" by Lift to Experience.

@43:02 This is reference to the comic strip "Cathy" where the main character Cathy frequently says "Ack Ack Ack".

@46:56 You may remember that the feud between Michael and Morgan's mom started when Michael mixed up West Side Story and Grease. It has since turned into a blood feud.

@49:35 This is a picture of one of Morgan's cans of Flamin' Hot Mtn Dew.

@01:07:11 Dear past Michael: I tried but could not find any without going through some dangerous sections of DeviantArt.

@01:20:40 This is the Bjork Clown.

@01:28:28 Click here to learn more about the Scania flag!

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E7: Point Doom. Motorcycles, karaoke, and the MCU (Mario Cinematic Universe) are the topics of discussion today. I hope you've reviewed the study guide or this episode isn't going to make any sense.

This is a Christian Podcast, no horny or swears.

Andrew's Rating: 3
Morgan's Rating: 7
Michael's Rating: 6

Episode discussion starts @22:03. Post-episode discussion starts @01:53:50.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E6: Showdown at Malibu Beach High. Psst, hey kid, you wanna see one of them High School Musicals? Well take a look at what I've got right here. It's definitely the same thing and I'll sell it to you for only $5.

Morgan's Rating: 3
Michael's Rating: 3

Episode discussion starts @14:19. Post-episode discussion starts @01:06:31.

@55:39 Like I'm walking on sunshine.

@01:14:37 The tweet referencing the "25 hour day".

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E5: Pier Pressure. This episode is our documentary on the history of Street Fighter. In theory we watched a Baywatch episode, but really wouldn't it be more interesting to talk about Street Fighter? THIS IS NOT THUNDER CAKE.

Sparkle's Rating: 4
Morgan's Rating: 6
Michael's Rating: 5

Find Sparkle's Podcast Sunday School Cinema here.

Episode discussion starts @12:23. Post-episode discussion starts @01:52:03.

@45:29 The mystery kitchen appliance. Here is what it ends up being: https://www.rcvintage.com/?name=HARVEST-YELLOW-STOVE&product=1030444097.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E4: Rookie Of The Year. We recorded two episodes in the same day late at night and mostly we talk about Clown Ice Cream and Mystery. It's a fucking weird one. No swears on this Christian Podcast Server

Morgan's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 6

Episode discussion starts @17:17. Post-episode discussion starts @01:16:56.

Assorted show notes:

@00:00 Note that for this episode there will be a lot of images referenced. An album has been made of these imagines in order of when they are referenced in the episode. Enjoy these horrible images!

@20:19 Here is Bert Kreischer's The Machine bit.

@36:17 Michael does not know what eminent domain means.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E3: Tequila Bay. We had no description for this. Should there be a description for this? Who knows? It's probably better this way. Treat this as the minimalism episode.

Morgan's rating: 8
Michael's rating: 8

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E2: River Of No Return Pt. 2. It's the obligatory musical episode of the podcast! It's the bigfeet episode! We always knew they'd get us one day, but we always assumed we could hide in a pickle barrel. We were wrong...

Morgan's Episode Rating: 5
Michael's Episode Rating: 4 (Secretly a 5) --- Yo Wtf Morgan? - Michael
Morgan's Two Parter Rating: 6
Michael's Two Parter Rating: 6

Episode discussion starts @17:20. Post-episode discussion starts @01:01:30 .

Additional show notes:

@01:11:30 Article on Bishop Sycamore.

@01:17:39 A disgusting looking soup.

@01:20:28 A better looking soup.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S3 E1: River of No Return Pt. 1. It's season 3! Finally we're done with season 2!
It's a prospector party! We're digging for gold in them/their hills and hopefully found some in this episode. We learn the secrets of a rifle that shoots crossbow bolts.

I'm not sure why, but Morgan's audio has a bit of a hum to it this episode. Sorry about that.

Morgan's Rating: 7
Michael's Rating: 8

Episode discussion starts @31:27. Post-episode discussion starts @01:36:19.

Assorted show notes:

@4:32 The interview with David Hasslehoff in Men's Health

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E22: The Summer of '85. Oh thank god, we're done with season 2. It's an episode that fulfills all of our predictions by being terrible. It's the last appearance of Harvey and we could not be happier. Also hopefully it's the last episode with statutory rape? We can only hope.

Morgan's Rating: 2
Michael's Rating: 2

Morgan's Season Rating: 3
Michael's Season Rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @22:00. Post-episode discussion starts @01:16:28.

Assorted show notes:

@3:32 Fred Durst's new look

@17:39 Neglected Characters early 2000s webcomic. And, here is the second one.

Ar:t by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E13: Red Knight 

It's the end of Ben! We are not sad to see him go, even if this is a particularly bad sign off. Come and join us on the beach for a reunion of the Red Knights (or more like the Red Tights amirite???). Also Morgan finally gets a Godfather.

Morgan's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 2.5

Episode discussion starts @22:49. Post-episode discussion starts @01:15:40.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E21: A Game Of Change. It's another gambling episode, so we have our resident gambling expert back. John Gilbert!
If anyone wants to start HubHub, let us know. We've got all the hot pictures of car feet (wheels)
We also learn that the lifeguard union sucks and you still have to work on your day off. Lifeguards, seize the means of production!!

John's Rating: 5
Morgan's Rating: 6
Michael's Rating: 5

Episode discussion starts @19:31. Post-episode discussion starts @01:35:57.

Assorted show notes:

@16:24 The image Morgan is referring to.

@45:45 Here is the first horrible image (that Michael sent to Morgan) that Morgan posts

@46:27 This is the second image

@47:27 And the last horrible Cool Cat image

@1:23:18 A look at future Vito courtesy of John

@1:34:15 A very dated picture

@01:46:21 THIS IS KORFBALL

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose

S2 E20: The Big Spill. Baywatch may not have the balls to make fun of Greenpeace, but we do. Who's your favorite Jeff? There is no wrong answer, but there is a right one and you will be tested on this. Baywatch and Cool Cat, partners in socialism.

Featuring, yet again, The Drop King himself Robert Persinger!

Robert's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 2
Morgan's Rating: 7

Episode discussion starts @14:52. Post-episode discussion starts @01:25:10.

Assorted show notes:

@33:22 It was not a two parter. In fact, it is the very next episode!

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E19: The Lost Treasure Of Tower 12. It's the perfect crime. Watch a Baywatch episode. Force a guest to join us. Record a podcast episode. Use their larger platform as a KEXP DJ to promote the podcast. Realize that we're still a Baywatch podcast and bury it by releasing it late. Perfect crime.

To find Reeves, you can check him out on KEXP! https://www.kexp.org/djs/reeves/.

Morgan's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 5.4
Reeve's Rating: 3.9/3.1

Episode discussion starts @13:42. Post-episode discussion starts @01:57:43.

Additional show notes:

@01:34:57 Here is a link to the Baywatch original television soundtrack on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5UhB5rW4Msew0zxfBHuQqO?si=0034e11713134e88.

@01:44:37 This is the Ebay link Morgan is referring to.

@01:46:06 Michael was wrong! There is going to be a Dark Side of Baywatch airing on August 19th on Vice.

@02:06:14 You are hearing the tail end of a conversation that we had out of podcast where I asked for that one line to be inserted.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E18 Shark's Cove. This might be our horniest episode yet. We spend a lot of time talking about feet and capitalism with Ali. Gotta keep your spare toes around somewhere close for this one.

No, we will not post links to Sonic Hyperinflation in the show notes.

Check out Ali's podcast at: https://whathappened.show/

Morgan's rating: 6
Michael's rating: 7
Ali's rating: 7

Episode discussion starts @10:29. Post episode discussion starts @01:57:54.

Assorted show notes:

@29:33 Here is a picture of the insides of a waverunner.

@01:30:26 If you've never seen the My Brand/Look With Your Special Eyes commercial, now is your chance. Additionally, here is the follow-up.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E17: The Chamber and Where's Wally S1 E11 Ahead of the Future:
Where's Mitchy
Where's Mitchy
Did you see him?
Where's Mitchy
Where Where Where Where's Mitchy
Where Where Where Where's Mitchy
Where's Mitchy
Where's Where Where Where Where's Mitchy
Did you see him huh?

Michael's Rating: 2
Morgan's Rating: 2
Morgan's Rating: 8
Michael's Rating: 8

Episode discussions starts @8:39. Post-episode discussion starts @25:39.
Part 2 discussion starts @32:49. Post-episode discussion starts @1:36:47.

You watch the content of our part 2 of the episode here!

Assorted show notes:

@48:29 We decided it was funnier to present a stupid idea, say we'll do it, and then not actually do it. You can listen to the theme song if you watch the episode!

@55:18 Here is the South Park clip in question.

@1:43:17 Michael got it wrong. It's The Arrogant Sons of Bitches.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E16: Now Sit Right Back and You'll Hear a Tale: *To the tune of the Gilligan's Island theme song*
Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of some intrepid viewers. The person writing this descri-i-i-ption, hates all of this.
This group was a mighty crew, one of them likes this show. 3 podcasters sat down that day for more time than needed, more time than needed.
The episode started getting rough, Michael lost his mind. If not for the other two this episode would be lost, this episode would be lost.
The podcast set ground on the shore of this uncharted episode, with Michael, Morgan too, Em, and nobody else.
We cooouldn't convince, any one else at all, here on Baywatch Rookie School!

Ratings don't matter for this episode nor do time stamps because Michael would like to not remember this episode of Baywatch (Morgan and Em disagree).

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E15: Sea of Flames. Eyyyy, that's a good pee. Much like pee, the spice must flow. This episode is on fire and so are we. It's precognitive summer camp, earthquakes, a revelation of future past, and lots of general nonsense
 
Morgan's Rating: 4
Michael's Rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @06:43. Post-episode discussion starts @01:30:20.

Assorted show notes:

@33:24 The Ben Shapiro Aquaman clip.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E14: Big Monday. Monday funday better than a Sunday. Can only do it one way, & that is the way of the wave inside you? No, that's just trauma.

We have decided that every 30 years, we'll have a big podcast episode in honor of Big Monday. There will be two of these and then we will be dead. But they'll be really great episodes (to be determined)! 

Morgan's Rating: 4
Michael's Rating: 5

Episode discussion starts @16:29. Post-episode discussion starts @1:28:00.

Assorted show notes:

@31:25 Is it chicken or is it fish? I know it's fish but is it chicken?

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E13: War of Nerves. Folks...This episode is good. I can't believe I'm saying this but you should watch this one.
Buzz Belmondo is back and better than ever. He is here to single-handedly make this one of the greatest pieces of cinema in history
The only problem is that apparently no one in this episode knows how apples work and it's a crime

Jami's Rating: 9
Michael's Rating: 10
Morgan's Rating: 11

Episode discussion starts @11:30. Post-episode discussion starts @01:45:08.

Assorted show notes:

@01:06:03 The image Morgan is referring to is the picture for this episode. Enjoy

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E12: Reunion: [Baywatch Rookie School studio]
Morgan: [chanting] feet, feet-
Michael: feet, FEET
David Hasselhoff: [pounding his buoy] FEET, FEET, FEET

Morgan's Rating: 5
Michael's Rating: 7
Sandcrab722's Rating: 9

Episode discussion starts @13:20. Post-episode discussion starts @01:22:17.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S4E12: Second Time Around

We're back! Morgan's back from vacation, so we're recording the episodes we don't have any guests for. Baywatch is hitting it's stride in Season 4, which means they've stopped writing interesting episodes and are just recycling their formulas

Morgan's Rating: 3
Michael's Rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @18:39. Post-episode discussion starts @01:15:18.

Assorted show notes:

@22:55 Hasslehoff Devouring His Cheeseburger by Goya

@23:48 Stills from Baywatch the Animated Series (if only it existed)

@33:44 Conversion rates for 1993

@01:08:11 Robert Kardashian's Cream of Wheat

@01:09:22 Lauren Conrad's Tequila Shot

@01:09:48 The Nicole Brown Simpson Chicken Nachos

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E11: If Looks Could Kill. Glee, you're on watch. We're suing you for pre-cog IP theft of dinosaur prom. It's time for the horniest episode and amazingly, it's not even creepy horniness.

We do apologize for some bumpy noises coming from Michael's mic. That is getting fixed very soon!

Morgan's Rating: 7
Helen's Rating: 6
Michael's Rating: 7

Helen's Falling in Love Montage Podcast
Helen's Twitter: @helenherbstl

Episode discussion starts at @09:54. Post-episode discussion starts @01:29:29.

Assorted show notes:

@01:52 Here are the said rare photos of Joseph Pilates.

@01:07:16 Here is the image Michael is referring to.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E10: The Trophy Pt. 2. This one is fully off the rails folks. They should not have made The Trophy a two part (or at all quite frankly). Join us for a discussion of grunge, trash, buttholes, and our new service: Therapy 2.0.

Morgan's Rating: 2
Michael's Rating: 3

Episode discussion starts @11:25. Post-episode discussion starts @01:22:16.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E9: The Trophy Pt. 1. I am so glad that I am in the future because I can confidently say that this episode starts the end of the absolute worst of S2 (at least so far). This is the episode of Baywatch where the writers really want to stress to us how much of a problem it is that teenage girls go around ruining the lives of older men who have no choice but to be attracted to them. Folks,,, it's a bad one.

Morgan's rating: 2
Michael's rating: 4

Episode discussion starts @14:05. Post-episode discussion starts @01:23:55.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.

S2 E8: Thin or Die. Welcome to Baywatch's fat shaming episode! There's a lot at steak, like a date, a mischievous dog, and whiskey stew. Luckily we have our first returning guest, Valerie, to help us talk about this episode and go on extended stew based bits.

Morgan's Rating: 3
Valerie's Rating: 6
Michael's Rating: 3

Episode discussion starts @09:24. Post-episode discussion starts @01:26:23.

Assorted show notes:

@17:35 A picture of Success Rice.

@46:05 Michael is referring to the dog pictures on this page for Alpo products.

@57:46 There all is aching.

Art by Katie Rose @kilogramrose.