We took a few days after the event to record this, which means we aren't at the fire and brimstone stage everyone else might be. We congratulate Bangladesh on a magnificent win, and lay out our causes for the defeat.

01:04 Bangladesh's Impressive Win Against Pakistan
08:44 Pakistan's Poor Performance and Team Selection
14:47 Flaws in the World Test Championship Ranking System
21:41 Issues with Pakistan's Pitch Preparation and Workload Management
33:05 Mistreatment of Players and Lack of Support
42:42 The Pressure on Shan’s Captaincy
52:48 The Impact of Rhythm and Schedule on Player Performance
01:02:33 The Need for Changes in the Team and Board
01:05:31 Predicting the Outcome of the Next Test Match

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"He is the first splash on a blank canvas, the first flick of a torchlight into the abyss. If ever an athletics legacy will be built - though don't hold your breath - it will start with him."

From Osman's article: https://www.espn.com/olympics/story/_/id/40801739/paris-olympics-2024-pakistan-gold-medal-javelin-all-hail-improbable-arshad-nadeem-first-maybe-last-kind

We try our best to capture the unprecedented nature of Arshad Nadeem's Olympic record shattering moment.

0:00 Arshad Nadeem's Gold medal - Pakistan's greatest sporting achievement?
5:24 Overcoming obstacles - Arshad's remarkable journey
9:20 Ya Ali and the folk-hero
15:07 The institutional obstacles for Pakistnai athletes
20:49 Earning money in non-traditional careers in Pakistan
27:50 India's sporting industrial complex
40:00  The realities Arshad deals with
43:30 The world's reactions
48:50 The magic of the Olympics
51:00 The magical last throw

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We are back to worship the algo, and so fittingly we have found a way to force the Kendrick Drake beef into this episode. We also take a look at what Babar can learn from Akshay Kumar and Aditya Pancholi, why Andre Russell is the GOAT, and our take on the World T20 squads.

Kendrick, Drake and the 2023 World Cup
Babar Azam, Akshay Kumar and Aditya Pancholi
Bobby's career at an inflection point
The role of bowling in modern T20s
Dr. Sohail's resignation and PCB shenanigans
T20 World Cup Contenders
Dre Russell Love

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*puke* A terrible series that taught us nothing and made us despair a lot. We dive deep mostly into Babar, but also the larger malaise afflicting Pakistan cricket.

0:00 - 5:00 Intro and whining
5:00 Lack of ambition and intent
11:14 Toxic national team atmosphere
24:23 Babar's lack of evolution
30:37 Did we learn anything at all?

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To celebrate the star turn by Naseem Shah in his new ***** ad, we decide to take a look back at some of the iconic cola adverts starring Pakistani players. Thirty years of pure pop culture.

Original compilation of ads: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhwhTaU14zM
Osman podcast discussing War Minus the Shooting: https://www.81allout.com/2021/02/22/an-unquiet-history-an-interview-with-writer-osman-samiuddin/
Ahmer article on separating art from artist: https://www.espncricinfo.com/story/ahmer-naqvi-the-mohammad-asif-enigma-913199
Abid Hussain article on tape ball history (Nadeem Finger) https://www.thecricketmonthly.com/story/929545/tape-ball-tales

0:55 Intro to why we aren't doing data but Naseem ogling
4:00 BDS, Palestine and the ethics of working with such companies
9:00 Stop calling us boomers (we then proceed to do boomer shit)
10:40 1987 Have a ***** Day ad with Imran Khan
11:55 1990 with IK and Ws
14:00 1993 Vital Signs traffic jam
14:31 1994 Haroon
17:00 1996 the iconic Nothing Official About It ad
23:30 1997 Saeed and Afridi
26:50 1998 Saqlain 
27:00 1999 Shoaib, Speed, 100mph
29:00 2000 The last Afridi launda ad
31:08 2001 Wasim bhai 
32:10 2002 Lehmann, Warne and Street Cricket
34:19 2003 Problematic 'tribal' ad
34:50 2004 Osman rant on Strings
36:19 2005 Harasser with unknown
37:12 2006 Adnan Sami
38:30 2007 Younis Khan 
40:51 2008 Retired Wasim and baby Asim Azhar(?)
41:30 2009 Last minute Afridi ad
42:40 2010 Aisam ul Haq ad
43:19 2011 Afridi and Shoaib
44:00 2012 Afridi golf etc
45:30 2013 Misbah, Junaid Irfan 'pahunch toa gaye ho'
48:20 2014 Afridi, Ws, Selfie, Gul, Sana Mir
49:22 2015 Afridi and Ukmal
52:05 2016 No cricketers
52:30 2018 No cricketers
53:30 2016 (no clip) Afridi and Misbah shipwrecked
55:00 Naseem's ad and his burgeoning sexiness

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This week, we respond to many fan queries and do a detailed discussion of our criticism's of Ramiz Raja's stint as PCB Chairman. We also debate just how gold was Shaheen's 'don't anger me' Insta story, and discuss how a return of the franchise-based Champion's League tournament is both exciting and ridiculous.

00:00 Intro and Shaheen's insta story
9:53 The Chairman Rambo era
37:03 What does a revival of the Champions League mean?

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We had planned to do a data deep dive on the recent PSL, but instead we have to content with all the elite level clownery going on at the PCB. 

Turns out, the board changed captains and released a #wholesome press release which had never been shared with the players instead. 

So now, we've got one recently sacked captain back, one highly fucked over player sacked without being told why, two of the most recent successful PSL captains not even considered, and two known haters of the current captain back in the team. 

Of course, the big question is, which of these can run 2 kilometres with faujis?

00:00 Discussion on the latest farce
04:11 Lack of communication and mismanagement in the PCB
08:04 Mohsin Naqvi's role as chairman
12:16 Treatment of players in Pakistan cricket
25:30 The captaincy debate and overlooked captains in the PSL 
30:40 The legacy of Sheharyar Khan
47:21 Same old genuine concern for the future of Pakistani cricket

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APOLOGIES FOR THE LATE UPLOAD ON AUDIO!

Part 2 of our episode with the 3-time PSL winning General Manager of Islamabad United Rehan ul Haq. We go match by match throughout the whole magical season, charting all the ups and downs and how Islamabad's side found their way back to the top.

0:00 Match 5 - Trouncing the Kings
4:54 Match 6 - Rematch with Zalmi, Shadab's best PSL knock
10:06 Match 7 - Losing to nemesis Lahore, rise of Faheem
15:03 Match 8 - Beating Karachi, Pollard's genius, Haider's emergence
18:02 Match 9 - Did Islu hit their peak when beating Multan? Finally, home advantage, Usman Khan eater of spin, Munro's guts
26:14 His Imadness takes over the playoffs, integrating Imad into Isloo
32:37 Eliminator 2 - Overcoming that final hurdle
39:19 The final vs Multan, Ifti mania and the importance of momentum, Naseem's pep talk and clutch batting, Hunain's cuteness
49:21 Shadab's catch of Babar

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In our favourite episode ever, great friend of the podcast and 3-time PSL winning General Manager of Islamabad United Rehan ul Haq joins us. We go match by match throughout the whole magical season, charting all the ups and downs and how Islamabad's side found their way back to the top.

0:00 Intro and banter
4:28 Why this PSL was his proudest professional achievement
7:51 The importance of team culture and how it was established at Islu
21:11 Match 1 - Beating Qalandars at home
25:41 Match 2 - Losing to Multan, Shadab as captain and Naseem as sexpot superstar
39:26 Match 3 - Losing to Quetta, Abrar's courage and chutzpah
45:42 Match 4 - Shocker vs Zalmi, Arif Yaqub's genius, playing vs Babar, Hesson's calmness

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Guess who's back? We take a look at each of the PSL sides and how their seasons have gone 8 games in. From realising that Karachi Kings, not Lahore, are the worst PSL side ever to getting excited about everyone from Saim Ayub and Khwaja Nafay to Hunain Shah and Arif Yaqoob, we cover all the highs and lows of the season so far.

0:00 Intro
1:39  Lahore Qalandars - the funnest team in the PSL
10:51 Karachi Kings - the absolute worst thing about Karachi
21:26 Islamabad United - wait, why are these guys not good?
31:20 Peshawar Zalmi - wait, these guys are good?
40:12 Quetta Gladiators - the Saify in the room...
50:00 Multan Sultans - the unsexy dynasty

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A match that was over in the first powerplay, or a slow-burning thriller? Ahmer and Osman can't agree on how to frame Multan's win over a lacklustre Islamabad.

You can also watch the show on https://begin.watch, an upcoming, premium OTT platform called #Begin.

0:00 Why Ahmer hated this match
1:45 Why Osman enjoyed it
4:52 Multan's efficiency
6:42 Where was Shadab?
10:36 Multan's dominance at home
12:38 Why is the fielding so bad?
14:19 Power Rankings

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The two-time winners are now two-time losers. Lahore slump to another defeat as Quetta looks rejuvenated.

You can also watch the show on https://begin.watch, an upcoming, premium OTT platform called #Begin.

00:00 Intro and Khwaja Nafay mania
2:46 That PSL time of the year
4:28 Jahandad and the joy of PSL
6:15 Enjoying these moments for what they are
7:21 Nafay's viral ride
9:38 Cricket's toxic babay
11:00 Lahore's multiple concerns
13:10 Haris's form
14:00 Part-time keeper or specialist?
16:30 Lahore's potential
17:30 Sahibzada vs Selfie

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We are back with a new episode and no new news or matches. So we just sit and cry about the PCB. Enjoy!

0:00 The Upcoming mega season of Pakistan cricket
3:10 Shan Masood's captaincy and Naseem's return
7:00 The NOC brouhaha and the future of the PSL
15:27 The potential of tapeball cricket
20:00 Frustration with existing PCB management
28:40 Mohsin Naqvi's multiple roles
41:48 Why tapeball offers self-sustainability
46:30 Shaheen's future and his mistreatment 
53:00 Wiki's back baby

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So we get that boring, one-sided blowout match early. Multan looked to have scored below par before proving that was enough for two Karachi chases.

You can also watch the show on https://begin.watch, an upcoming, premium OTT platform called #Begin. 

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Once the marquee matchup of the league, both teams now seem to be in the midst of new chapters.

You can watch the show on https://begin.watch, an upcoming, premium OTT platform called #Begin. 

0:00 - 1:21 Intro
1:22 - 2:21 Regeneration of Quetta
2:22 - 3:33 Peshawar's struggles
3:34 - 5:11 Saffy bhai and giving the kids a chance
5:12 - 12:31 Karachi's evolving school of batting, and Hanif Malik's impact
12:32 - 14:27 Peshawar's confounding tactics
14:28 - 17:06 Abrar's bowling and celebration
17:07 Power rankings

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Welcome to Batta Fast's coverage of PSL9. We will be doing a post-match show for every game of this year's PSL, with the episodes being hosted on our Youtube page, as well as on an upcoming, premium OTT platform called #Begin. You can also watch this show on https://begin.watch

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Friend of the podcast, founder of the Five Rupees blog, and itinerant cricket columnist for Dawn, Ahsan Butt joins the show to discuss the year that was in Pakistan cricket. 

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Two great cricket writers, Rameen (@rameenwhile) and Raiyan (@CricCritic2) join the show to discuss the two games from the New Zealand series, their thoughts on the T20 World Cup, and their take on how older cricket fans view the game.

Read this beautiful take by Rameen on Sundays and cricket: https://medium.com/@rameensalman/on-sundays-and-cricket-410620ed02d5

Here's a fascinating article by Raiyan on Pakistan's ideal T20 batter
https://medium.com/@raiyan201/pakistans-ideal-t20-batter-4554848a481

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As closely fought as a whitewash can get, Shan Masood's team continues to put in some of the best performances by Pakistan in Australia, admittedly a low-bar. We discuss Jamal's heroics, Saim's sexiness, and the joys of test cricket.

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On an eventful first day of the final Test of the tour, Pakistan put up a fighting total despite an early morning collapse. But as discussed here, its the bowling that has led to more heartbreaks than the batting.

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In a solo episode, Ahmer discusses how cricket creates stories of hope and glory in our minds; the pleasure of watching in the dark with friends on Whatsapp; and knowing when the good old days end and the loss begins.

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As Pakistan prepares to play the second test of its Australian tour, we preview what looks like a very bleak test match.

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As Australia thrash Pakistan inside four days, we review the abject batting failure, the context of Lyon's 500 wickets, and an impassioned discussion on how cricket fails its poorer teams.

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Welcome to the batting sibling of our great Pakistani pace spells series! We start off with a canonical entry, Inzi's starmaking turn at the '92 World Cup semifinal.

0:00 Intro
03:45 Inzi's iconic innings
08:36 Context for this match
15:45 Jonty's runout that made fielding a genuine skill
22:07 Inzi in cluth moments
28:50 The 1992 World Cup and the birth of modern cricket
37:50 How Inzi broke NZ's foolproof bowling 
44:55 How this innings defined his reputation

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The golden delicious Imran Ahmed Khan returns to join us in reviewing the latest PSL Draft, as well as the future of the league.

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One of Pakistan cricket's great unsung heroes and a close friend of the podcast, Imran Ahmad Khan draws upon his experience as the former Head of Player Acquisition & Management at the PSL to help break down the league's draft process.

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Introducing our Manjan series, where each episode sells the manjan around Pakistan cricket these days. In this episode, we preview Pakistan's tour of Oz, get cautiously excited by the prospect of Shan Masood's captaincy, worry about Pakistan's bowling, and take a look at the double standard masti from Hafeez and Wahab.

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We debate India's knockout record, the toss and the pitch, Australia's unreal performance(s), and takeaways for a few others.

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#INDvAUS review - Dozakh ke shehzaday win yet again

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#PAKvENG but really a #CWC23review for Pakistan - it's all over

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#PAKvNZ review - this f***ing team... 

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Pakistan's semifinal chances, #PAKvBAN review, #NZvRSA review, #PAKvNZ preview, and calling out a shambolic PCB

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#PAKvRSA review - dil toooooots

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#PAKvAFG review - absolute domination by Afghanistan. Shoaib Naveed aka Silly Tiddy aka PSL Daddy replaces Osman as we discuss Pakistan's woeful bowling, Babar's costly captaincy, and Afghanistan's class and composure.

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Finally, the Indian team wins an ICC event after having dominated the world game for so long. We give the team their flowers, marvel at the way Bumrah has silenced all doubters, do the blasphemy of comparing him to Wasim, and consider the tactics and choking allegations from a fantastic final.

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Australia - shaitaan ki pasandeeda team.

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#PAKvIND review - ronay walay ke ronay ka waqt shurroo. 

We discuss the stunning collapse, how it rates in the all time rivalry, how boring this match was, and why there is a limit to hoping for a method to the madness.

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SOMETIMES ITS CRAMPS, SOMETIMES ITS ACTING

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We discuss #PAKvNED, and how Pakistan played down to its opponents, how Saud Shakeel was an absolute revelation, and how we feel about Shadab and Hasan Ali's bowling.

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Welcome to our special series of shows for the World Cup!

In episode 1, we dig into possibly the most underwhelming start to any major tournament ever. We break down the one-sided domination of New Zealand in the opener, and we do the hope-churning task of previewing Pakistan's chances at this tournament 

Watch out for episodes after every Pakistan match, as well as the knockouts.

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Batta Fast continues to host fast bowling royalty, as one of the greatest to ever do it joins the show. We talk to Waqar Younis about his greatest spells, what it felt like to miss out on the 1992 World Cup and his comeback from injuries, and his relationships with Wasim, Imran and others.

Watch the show: https://youtu.be/1QgjgkHYIpk

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The most requested spell ever since this podcast began, we recap Junaid Khan's brilliant, and hugely underrated spell against India in a forgotten bilateral series. We cover the many lows and few highs of Junaid's career, the absurdity of this tour, and spend some time with Mirza Ghalib.

Watch: https://youtu.be/50ahHdTqYYc

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The Sultan of Swing, the greatest left-armer in cricket history, the GOAT Wasim Akram joins Ahmer and Osman to discuss his favourite wickets and memories, his moral responsibility for making an an entire generation get the burger cut hairstyle, and what it was like bowling with Waqar, Imran and Shoaib.

Watch episode here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waHpU4Or1dc

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Peak Waqar, peak Haal, peak Pakistan. A slightly forgotten spell of a slightly overlooked genius, this reverse swing devastation of South Africa was perhaps Waqar at his most ferocious. We pick apart what made this spell special, and dissect everything from Waqar's swag and style to his injuries and decline. 

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The spell that gave birth to the legend of Wasim, to a left-arm fast renaissance in cricket, and to the death of English white-ball cricket for several decades.

Few moments in cricket history are as indelible as Wasim's double-wicket death strike in the final of the World Cup. We break down the spell, the legacy of Wasim's impact, and who he was before this spell changed his life, as well as ours.

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We can't stop gushing over Afghanistan's wonderful run to the semifinals, including a reflection on Mohammad Nabi's Hall of Fame career, and the greatest injury in cricket history.

1:00 Reviewing the group stages and celebrating Afghanistan's magical run
6:30 Gulbadin's magnificent, iconic injury
10:30 Afghanistan's winning tactics
14:00Mohammad Nabi's GOAT career
32:00 South Africa's atypical run
37:00 Previewing the semifinals
39:00 Rohit's incredible transformation
42:00 Hope for rain-free matches
45:00 Expectations for the finals

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"Pakistan cricket at its best - one minute down, next minute up!"

The return of the prodigal son, playing in the country where he was jailed, in an ICC final vs the eternal rivals - Mohammad Amir's tournament-winning spell in the 2017 Champion's Trophy felt like the long awaited return of the teenager caught in cricket's worst fixing scandal of the 21st century. But was it really that, and what did Amir's career mean before and after this spell? And what about all those dropped catches? We break down one of the most fascinating personalities and spells in Pakistan cricket history. Oh, and Nasser Hussain has a cameo talking about his iconic commentary for Virat Kohli's wicket!

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Has there ever been an enigma quite like Mohammad Asif? Even in the colourful history of Pakistan cricket, no one has quite combined both the highs and lows quite like Asif did. In a brief career punctuated by all sorts of scandals, Asif  managed to mesmerise a fandom obsessed with pace by removing it from the equation. A cricketer who bowled like he was playing music, Asif's most famous spell wasn't the best example of his  longform artistry. Yet in compiling a series of video game deliveries against one of cricket's most storied batting lineups,  it was the sort of performance that meant he was never forgotten.

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If you're a cricketer who shares the same last name as one of the country's biggest ever stars, how do you stand out of his shadow? How about a stunning opening spell that led Pakistan's men's team to its first ever victory over India in a World Cup match?

Shaheen Shah Afridi was already a star when the 2021 T20 World Cup rolled around, but this spell took him to another level, the second episode in Batta Fast's discussion on favourite Pakistani pace spells.

We take a look at the historic status of Shaheen's spell, the changing nature of Pashtuns in Pakistani society and cricket, and potentially eclipsing the fame of his very famous father-in-law.

2:50 – 3:38 – Aao Shaheen Afridi ki nazar utaaro 

6:43 – 9:00 – NostraOsmanus for Shaheen prediction

9:30 – 11:44 – And now it’s time for Ahmer’s WTF analogy, featuring the GoW opening

15:58 – 16:20 – Where we slander Bazid Khan

19:30 – 21:49 – And now it’s time for Ahmer’s WTF analogy II, featuring M Night Shyamalan

23:22 – 25:20 Hasan Cheema ki nazar bhi and Kylian Mbappe

33:20 – 36:24- Getting heavy on the Pashtun identity

56:40 – 58:40   If Shaheen went to Karachi Kings or Islamabad United

1:05:40 – 1:07:30 Shaheen and his Alpha transformation

1:09:29 – 1:10:20 Shaheen wins shaadi season

1:11:05 – 1:11:50 – I have Trump hair

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The first episode of our podcast kicks off a series where we discuss our favourite fast bowling spells by Pakistani players.

We begin with the birth of a legend - Shoaib Akhtar's two wickets in two balls, including Sachin on a golden duck, began one of the most exciting, intriguing and dramatic careers in cricket history.

We go from Bappi Lahiri to Salman Khan in trying to explain what and who Shaiby was.

0 – 2:20 – Intro to the podcast
2:45 – 3:40 – The spell as the Pakistani Dream: bowling two Indians, one of whom is Sachin in front of a full house off two consecutive balls
3:40 – 5:55 – Silence in the Biggest Stadium in the World & some more on the dreamlike nature of Shoaib impact
7:32 – 10:15 Maradona 1986 vs England comparison
13:00 – 14:30 - The Two Deliveries as works of art 
20:20 – 22:17 - The Sallu Bhai comparisons
25:25 – 27:55 - The Faisalabad Story
28:25 – 33:40 - Gun Master Interlude – Bappi Da! Including the Jimmy Jimmy tangent
 38:00 – 39:39 - Why Dravid was the greater wicket (and Shaibi bowling genius)
41:45 – 43:53 Shaibi Origin Story and being an outlier as a worldly star
43:59 – 45:10 Shaibi Saves a Child and Hello Nicole Kidman 
45:11 – 47:00 The Groundedness of being Shoaib all the way through 
47:10 – 49:20  On a White Horse in the Margalla Hills, with a Quran
49:20 – 50:50  Navigating a way through match-fixing era
52:55 – 53:33 The Mathew Hayden send-off
53:45 – 59:05 The Sachin Ball and the Art of Bunking School
59:20 – end Loving Sachin Ball contd

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