Explore every episode of the podcast Ask Kati Anything

Navigating attachment dynamics and discussing sensitive, taboo topics in therapy can feel daunting, but understanding how your attachment style influences your mental health is a major step toward healing. In this episode, licensed therapist Kati Morton dives deep into attachment theory, explaining the four primary attachment styles—secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized—and how they shape your adult relationships and sessions with your therapist. Kati also addresses how to bring up political differences or uncomfortable topics without fear of judgment, and answers your most pressing community questions. Timestamps 00:00 - Episode Overview 00:46 - Discussing Uncomfortable & Taboo Topics in Therapy 01:59 - Political Polarization, Media Rage-Bait, and Safe Spaces 07:57 - Why Therapists Keep Personal Opinions Private 15:02 - Examples of Kinks, Religion, and Money in Therapy 18:42 - What is Attachment Theory? 20:35 - "What If You Never Tried to Attach to Your Parents?" Thank you to this week's sponsors! REBOUND: visit www.hellorebound.com/askkatianything & check your insurance or get matched with a therapist ONESKIN: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code KATI at www.oneskin.co/KATI 25:48 - The 4 Attachment Styles in Relationships 28:22 - How Attachment Styles Show Up Under Stress 35:35 - Getting Too Attached to Your Therapist 42:11 - Feeling Lost When Your Therapist Goes on Vacation 46:27 - Red Flag: When a Therapist Shares Their Own Personal Drama 53:38 - Rebuttal: Is the Therapeutic Relationship Transactional or Dangerous? 01:00:23 - Healing Your Attachment Blueprint and Final Thoughts Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton My main YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/katimorton?sub_confirmation=1 Ask Kati Anything ep. 325 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT PUBLISHED BOOKS Why Do I Keep Doing This? https://geni.us/XoyLSQ Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY ONLINE THERAPY If you're looking for a therapist, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed online professional: https://betterhelp.com/kati - Enjoy 10% off your first month! (this is an affiliate link, which means a portion of your signup helps support the podcast at no extra cost to you) SOCIAL X https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ https://www.youtube.com/@askkatianything https://www.youtube.com/@katimorton PARTNERSHIPS Nick Freeman | nick@biglittlemedia.co Disclaimer: The information provided in this video is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical or mental health advice. It should not be used to diagnose or treat any health problem or disease. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional for diagnosis and treatment. Viewing this content does not establish a therapist-client relationship. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Ask Kati Anything, licensed therapist Kati Morton breaks down why eating disorders are rarely actually about the food or your body. We look at what’s really happening behind the strict rules, rituals, and need for control, and how these behaviors often show up as survival mechanisms to protect us from deeper stress, trauma, and overwhelm. Whether you’re struggling with restrictive eating, binging, purging, orthorexia, or just feel completely exhausted by your relationship with food, this conversation is here to give you clarity, reduce the shame, and help you understand what your brain is actually trying to tell you. REBOUND: visit www.hellorebound.com/askkatianything & check your insurance or get matched with a therapistONESKIN: Get 15% off OneSkin with the code KATI at www.oneskin.co/KATI 00:00 - Why eating disorders aren't actually about food 00:40 - Pica: Eating non-food items & nutrient deficiencies 05:41 - ARFID: Sensory food avoidance without body dysmorphia 11:13 - Rumination Disorder: Regurgitation & unspoken shame 14:13 - Anorexia Nervosa: Energy restriction & body checking 17:16 - Bulimia Nervosa: Binging, purging & compensatory rules 20:59 - Binge Eating Disorder: Rapid eating, guilt & secrecy 23:56 - Orthorexia: When clean eating & rules run your life 30:43 - Why eating disorders are actually survival mechanisms 49:35 - How loved ones can offer support without triggering shame MY BOOKS Why Do I Keep Doing This? https://geni.us/XoyLSQ Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY ONLINE THERAPY If you're looking for a therapist, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed online professional: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) This is an affiliate link, which means a portion of your signup helps support the podcast at no extra cost to you. PARTNERSHIPS Nick Freeman | nick@biglittlemedia.co Disclaimer: The information provided in this video is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical or mental health advice. It should not be used to diagnose or treat any health problem or disease. Always consult with a qualified healthcare professional for diagnosis and treatment. Viewing this content does not establish a therapist-client relationship. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most of us know what we should be doing. The harder question is why we can't actually do it. In this episode, Dr. Rachel Goldman joins Kati to talk about food noise, GLP-1s, cognitive behavioral therapy, and the small mindset shifts that change everything. Dr. Rachel is a clinical psychologist, clinical assistant professor of psychiatry at NYU Grossman School of Medicine, and author of the new book When Life Happens. She specializes in cognitive behavioral therapy, stress, and the treatment of eating disorders and obesity, and she runs a private practice in New York City. Today we talk about why your brain defaults to worst-case scenario (it's survival wiring, not a personal flaw), the one-word shift that interrupts all-or-nothing thinking, and the cognitive distortions quietly running your day. Dr. Rachel walks us through what food noise actually is and why some people genuinely don't have it, how GLP-1 medications are changing the conversation around eating disorders and obesity treatment, and what most people misunderstand about both. We get into why the body sends signals that get louder until you finally listen, why "finding balance" is setting you up to fail, and the reframe that finally helped Dr. Rachel stop cancelling on herself. We also go personal: how a clinical psychologist talks to her own kids about mistakes, what's actually in her toolbox when life feels too heavy, and the moment that changed how she thinks about self-care. If you've been doing the work, reading the books, going to therapy, and still feel like you can't get traction, this conversation gives you a place to start that doesn't require overhauling your life. Shopping with our sponsors helps support Ask Kati Anything BiOptimizers Magnesium Breakthrough — Go to bioptimizers.com/kati and use code KATI for 15% off your entire order, plus a FREE bottle of MassZymes Reddit — Download the Reddit app today! Chapters (0:00) Why you keep starting over (1:30) Why she wrote this book (4:18) What a mindset shift looks like (6:00) All-or-nothing thinking (8:30) The one small thing rule (12:02) Worst-case scenario thinking (14:30) The thoughts running your day (16:13) When therapists share personal stuff (18:30) Did training prepare her for motherhood? (24:00) Working in obesity treatment (30:00) GLP-1s and food noise explained (37:20) Dance, eating disorders, the wake-up (42:30) Your body is sending signals (44:30) Managing a book launch and two kids (48:00) The Casey Neistat self-care moment (52:20) Why finding balance fails (55:00) Poker chips and resilience (58:30) What she hopes her kids learn (1:02:30) Dr. Rachel's three tools (1:04:30) Where to find Dr. Rachel Dr. Rachel's book When Life Happens is out now: whenlifehappensbook.comFind Dr. Rachel on Instagram: @drrachelnyc More from Kati YouTube: youtube.com/c/katimorton Instagram: @katimorton Kati's BooksWhy Do I Keep Doing This? geni.us/XoyLSQTraumatized geni.us/Bfak0jAre u ok? geni.us/sva4iUY Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On episode 226 of Ask Kati Anything, Kati addresses a range of complex mental health topics, including: The morality of suicide and assisted death for chronic illnesses Coping with anxiety around receiving compliments and kindness Moral responsibility for actions by individuals with severe mental illnesses Understanding and processing trauma and emotions Developing a sense of self after childhood trauma Breaking the cycle of narcissistic abuse and the importance of speaking up Kati is a licensed therapist & provides insights and guidance on these challenging issues, offering a professional perspective while acknowledging the nuances and complexities involved in each situation. Audience Question 1. Do you think suicide is selfish? And any thought on feeling like you're living not for yourself, but so that the people who love you won't be sad? I want to add this: Is it ever okay if you live with an illness like fibromyalgia or any other chronic condition where the symptoms are so unbearable? And is it different with terminal illnesses like cancer? 01:36 2. Sometimes I feel very anxious? Uncomfortable? like not sure what to do with myself when others say something nice to me or do something nice for me, especially for no particular reasons. I feel like I'm not deserving of it or like I have not earned it or that I can reciprocate it. So then I spend a lot of time thinking how... 17:21 3. Can people with severe mental illnesses be held morally responsible for things they did or ways they behave? There's a man on youtube named Daniel Larson, some may heard of him, he was a tik toker/youtube video vlogger who, according to documentation, has schizophrenia, autism, PTSD, and Bipolar. There could be more but I'm not sure. This man has seen a lot of online hate and harassment due to his behavior, which include: apparent attraction to underage people, delusions of fame and grandeur, a large sense of entitlement, and his physical violence towards his mentor when he had some kind of mental breakdown... 23:58 4. This may be an obvious question but what does it mean to 'process' an emotion or a trauma? I feel like this is a term we use a lot but no one really defines what it means. Are there prescribed steps that we need to follow? 30:54 5. Hi Kati I hope this question resonates with others but how do you know ‘who you are’ or have a sense of self if your childhood and adolescence was filled with multiple traumas and as a result the only constant in your adulthood is the side effects of the trauma. How do you become a person once you are already an adult? 40:40 6. My therapist said” By keeping quiet, you are allowing it to continue hurting you.” My mom is a narcissist. What the heck? I’m the “victim”! I don’t control her. I don’t choose anything she does to me. What is he saying? Sounds like he’s blaming me? 44:19 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY Join Kati's PATREON community to access more perks: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Ask Kati Anything (ep. 224) licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about how therapists react when clients have breakthroughs, how we can fight hopelessness, and ways that we can more easily talk to a therapist of the opposite sex about sensitive topics. She then dives into why it can be hard for so many of us to feel and process emotions, how to deal with attachment in therapy, and why our attachment styles can vary so much. 1. Hi Kati, I'm interested to know when a client (who struggles to show emotions) starts to get upset, angry, emotional etc.. Do you internally but not visibly celebrate? A lot of people including myself hate seeing someone upset, although I'd never try to stop them expressing what they are feeling. 00:46 2. Hi Kati, How do you fight hopelessness when it feels like mental health has consumed your life. Even though I am not at the very bottom anymore, my psychiatrist told me there's a good chance I'll experience severe depression again and again (have had severe depression on a non-functional level in 2023 and 2014, but I'm improving with medication and back to work at my warehouse job). How do I feel like I am not doomed due to mental illness? 08:03 3. I see a therapist of the opposite gender and some topics are a little sensitive to talk about, any tips on getting started? 13:20 4. Hi Kati! After therapy sessions, I often struggle for days, unable to fully feel or let go of emotions. I intellectualize a lot, but I also have a constant feeling that there is something I’ve missed sharing. Why is it so hard for some of us to just feel and process emotions? Also, do therapists get frustrated when clients reach out outside of sessions but struggle to express themselves during sessions? 18:30 5. My question is about attachment problems starting from early life. I have this problem with my therapist that when he posts about his other clients who are similar age to me (he is a lot older than me) and how proud he is with them, I withdraw and leave. I think I'm so used to people leaving me for the “other” in any condition I have been in. Since I was a child my siblings preferred my cousins visiting us and my coping way was to live my life independently as they were ignoring me. 28:51 6. Hi Kati! I completed your attachment workshop, and it was extremely helpful! I have some relationships with people where I lean towards anxious attachment and others where I lean towards avoidant. More specifically, anyone who I feel is like a motherly figure, I get more anxiously attached, but with my family and friends I am avoidant. Would this still be considered disorganized attachment even though there isn’t necessarily “push and pull” within each relationship, and it’s more just operating in one extreme or the other depending on who it is? What would cause someone to have such different attachment tendencies in different relationships? 34:49 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about whether or not we can be in therapy for too long, ways we can start seeing ourselves as survivors rather than victims, and when we should use coping skills versus sitting with the uncomfortable feeling. Finally, she discusses the ways we can open up more in therapy, finally share our trauma, and how to become more social and outgoing. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS 1. Hi Kati! I have been in counseling/therapy on and off for the last 7 years. I have always been an advocate of therapy and I encourage other people to do it. However, lately I am feeling an aversion. I think that I am seeing it as a futile exercise. Which is probably due to shame about not breaking some of my self-sabotaging patterns. I have not lost the trust in the process, however, I have probably lost the faith in myself to do the work. How do I overcome that? 01:05 2. Hi Kati, recently I’ve been struggling to cope with having been sexually assaulted and groomed in the past. How do I go from seeing myself as a survivor, rather than a victim? 07:00 3. I’m obsessing over the thought that I’ve been in therapy too long. I started in 2019, and since then many life calamities have happened that greatly complicated the work I was trying to do. Big disruptions such as Covid, and more normal life issues - a spouse retiring, stressful personal health issues, a parent’s health scare, a big move, kids starting a new school, financial instability, essential home renovations while financially struggling, and now living in very close proximity to the family members responsible for the childhood abuse and neglect... 11:54 4. I was wondering when you should use coping skills versus sitting with the uncomfortable feeling. My therapist is using exposure therapy and says part of exposure therapy is not using things to calm my anxiety but rather sit with the feeling. By doing this, my body will learn that I am actually not under threat and the anxiety will decrease on its own. I don't want to be rude and question my therapist but it just doesn't make sense to me. I have been an inpatient, gone through a partial hospitalization program, and seen a few different therapists who have all stressed the importance of knowing and using coping skills. So now I am just confused. Any words of wisdom would be much appreciated. 21:36 5. I have been diagnosed with DID and have been seeing my therapist whom I love the past 2.5 years. Recently, I realized that he still doesn't know a lot of my trauma. My parts are really wanting to come out and tell him their story, but I keep blocking them and intellectualizing the details of the trauma. My parts just want to cry, but I am scared to let them. What can I do? This is really bothering me. 28:41 6. How do I become more social and outgoing? My entire life I’ve been shy and everyone around me has seen it as a huge flaw. Even my mom said to me when I was a kid that she wishes I was more like [insert extroverted friend’s name here]. I just find that my social battery drains so fast and I’m scared my friends are gonna get to the point where they don’t want me around anymore. That’s been happening to me my whole life and it makes me so sad. No matter how lonely I am, I can't seem to change myself. Any help would be so appreciated 36:46 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY ONLINE THERAPY (enjoy 10% off your first month) While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati SOCIAL X https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about whether or not we can know so much about mental illnesses that we start acting like we have one. She will explore whether or not we can make up our mental illnesses or fake symptoms. Then she will discuss how our past therapeutic experiences affect our current ones, why our depression can get worse in the summer, and the difference between shame, guilt and embarrassment. Finally, she digs into what we can do if we find ourselves being a difficult patient, and what inner child work can really look like. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS 1. As a kid, I read all the mental health books at the library and as an adult, all the websites/research papers I can find to try to understand what is 'wrong' with me. I never really sought professional help until a few years ago after a longer than usual depressive episode. My question is this, is it possible that I may have read so much into it that by the time I had my assessment with the psychiatrist... 01:17 2. Can past therapeutic experiences have an effect on current therapy? A few years ago My college referred me for counseling (at college) after I disclosed something to them (I completely freaked out after hearing that someone from my past was possibly at the campus, I told my... 11:05 3. You mentioned in a few podcasts that depressive symptoms tend to get worse in the summer, I would like to hear your thoughts about what is the reason for it. In my experience it's a mix of sensitivity to the sunlight and heat, dissonance between my internal feelings and outside world and social pressure to be active and happy. 16:51 4. Hi Kati, can you discuss the difference between shame, guilt, & embarrassment? I had a traumatic childhood, and I do know & believe things weren't my fault. I don't have shame in the sense of the belief that something is/was wrong with me, however, the idea of someone knowing about my history makes me feel ashamed or embarrassed. I'd love to hear your thoughts... 21:53 5. Hi Kati, I've been in treatment for multiple diagnoses since I was 14 and now I'm 28. These days I'm totally disabled and cannot work or go to school; trust me, I tried, many times over and with all the accommodations. After 8 or 9 years of therapy I was labeled resistant, severe, complex, and later when I did some DBT, willful. I've tried many methods, therapists, medications, and even TMS. I'm not trying to be like this. There are feelings... 26:31 6. Hi Kati, you talk about inner child work a lot on your show. I can't say I always understand it, but recently I have been wondering if rather than giving support to your inner child can it be therapeutic in the opposite direction? Can I receive love, kindness and support from my inner child to help me find love, healing and respect for myself? Some of the last times I remember being happy and at peace were as a toddler and I wonder if toddler me can help adult me to find that emotional space again where I can feel safe and held. Thank you for all of the care you show us all... 33:42 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIALYouTube https://www.youtube.com/katimorton X https://twitter.com/KatiMortonTikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@katimortonFacebook https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katimortonPinterest https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast, licensed therapist Kati Morton explains what support a therapist can offer and how to know what we need from them. She also talks about chronic suicidality, dealing with frustration and anger, and why we can feel we are too late for everything we want to do in life. She also discusses how we can come to terms with a new diagnosis. Audience Questions: 1. Not sure if you’ve ever answered this question, but what does it mean exactly when my therapist asks “what do you need, how can I support you right now?” Especially during a difficult session. This happened recently when I was struggling during trauma work and I had no idea what to say when she asked, or what my options were exactly... 2. Could you talk a bit about chronic suicidality? I know it’s a heavy subject but I have found there is very little information out there about starting to address or manage it. Thoughts of ending my life are comforting to me and I find I automatically go there in response to any uncomfortable or upsetting thoughts. As a result these thoughts can be almost constant. As much as they help me, I know they are unhealthy to rely on so much.... 3. I have a question about frustration or rather anger. I’ve recently started therapy and in my last session I brought up the fact I was abused as a teenager… I had never told anyone about it until then. At the end of the session she told me that I may find I have a mix of emotions and possibly questions before our next session. She asked me to write them down and we could look at it when I see her again. I did have a lot of feelings, thoughts and questions so as she suggested I grabbed a pen and paper. I went to write stuff down but just felt this sudden anger, like really angry and I just gripped my pen and scribbled- like a toddler would only with a lot more frustration. It felt so childish. but after... 4. I would like to ask how can one cope with the feeling of "being too late in life", of having wasted all your life and now being too late to start over. I have failed in all aspects of life (no work, no family, no friends, nothing...) and I do not know where to start, how to find the strength and most important how to restore my "faith", how to stop thinking that the game is over. I was in therapy for many years but with no great results. Currently I need it so much but I do not have the money to support it. Ageism and society's standards do not help either... 5. I find myself thinking a lot about my therapist in between my sessions, not in a romantic obsessive kind of way, but rather constantly thinking how I can do better and communicate better with her. In my culture, growing up we were never taught about emotions, that they exist, how to pay attention to them, describe them, or deal with them. Parents are authoritative figures who provide all the necessities, have strong influence over all aspects of our lives such as schooling, romance, and career, but may not ever think to ask what we want or what we need... PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY Join this channel & access more perks: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCzBYOHyEEzlkRdDOSobbpvw/join ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/katimorton X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 220, licensed therapist Kati Morton delves into the complexities of suicidal thoughts, the impact of a therapist's age on therapy, and the appropriateness of requesting more physical touch from a therapist. She also clarifies the differences between Patreon and YouTube memberships, offers strategies for overcoming depressive symptoms, and discusses how experiencing sexual abuse at a young age can lead to abusive behaviors in the future. Audience questions: 1. I have no plan or intent but SI consumes a lot of my thoughts. I have struggled with passive SI for a while but not usually as often and I started doing things like cleaning my room just in case I die even though I have no plan. I don’t know why these thoughts keep entering my brain and I feel confused because the thought of dying both calms me and makes me terrified at the same time. I’m too afraid to talk about it in therapy and then I convince myself it’s not that big of a deal so I don’t say anything. I hope this makes sense because I’m confused with my own thoughts. 01:10 2. My past therapists have all been much older than me, but my current therapist is a few years younger, not by much, but enough for me to feel uneasy. It's been a few years and I am much more comfortable with her now. However, I still find myself screening what I say and I am reluctant to share my struggles. In the last few years, she has gotten married, had a kid, and lost a parent. I already feel like I've fallen behind in life because of my depression and GAD.... 11:33 3. How do you go about asking your therapist for more physical touch? I don’t want to cross any boundaries I don’t know about, and at the same time I worry that I will feel awful if she says no… so I’m really afraid to ask. She has used touch in the past with me (held my hand, placed her hand on my knee to remind me that she was still there when I was disassociating), but I’m scared to ask for it. How do I get over the fear of rejection from her even when I know it would just be a professional boundary? Thank you for these amazing videos! They have helped me so much! 18:55 4. I wonder if you can explain how you view your relationship with your patreons/ community members? I have been thinking of joining but l'm a bit confused about what the relationship is? Thanks. Hope you don't mind me asking again. 30:10 5. I have been suffering from depression and anxiety for the last few years, now I am constantly struggling with a very low mood. I feel like I'm trying to climb out of a dark hole. As it is affecting the normal everyday aspects of my life. What can I do to try and turn these around on a personal level? I have little to no energy or motivation every day... 32:37 6. Hey Kati not really sure if you would want to even talk to someone like me but here we go I guess.. Me and my younger sister were both SA by our dad from a very young age. My sister has started therapy recently and has been encouraging me to go too. I have thought about it but now don't feel like anyone would want to have me as a patient. Our abuser recently passed away and as I was going through boxes I came across some pics... 35:47 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/katimorton PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 219, Licensed therapist Kati Morton talks a lot about trauma therapy this week. She dives into how to start our trauma work, if there is ever a thing as too much trauma for therapy, and why it can be so hard for us to change our minds. She then explains ways we can show our bodies compassion, whether or not we can actually erase memories from our mind, and what we can do when our eating disorder changes. Audience questions: 1. Can you please talk about opening up to your therapist when you have a nervous laugh, dark humor and even darker trauma? I’ve only just started diving into my trauma in therapy but I don’t know how to properly articulate how everything is affecting me. I just laugh and make jokes because... 00:37 2. I've sought out two "Trauma based therapists" who have both told me they aren't equipped to handle my level of trauma. For reference, SA from ages 8-16ish with + preg & subsequent loss as a young teen, and Dissociation during that time. No DPDR, DID, etc. So what do you do when... 09:29 3. Why is it so hard for me to change my mind? I feel once I agree to do something for/with with someone I don’t feel like I can change my mind, I feel like sometimes this is due to not wanting to disappoint others.... 16:29 4. How can I show my body compassion…? I was approved to go to PHP at Center for Discovery in Southern CA. While I am grateful beyond belief that Medi/Medi is covering it, I have SO MANY mixed emotions…I’ve said before that I was born with Spina Bifida. From day 1 my body has not fully functioned, but I’m at the point where I’m probably on no less than 15 medications... 21:56 5. What are the chances I could [completely] erase some traumatic episodes from my memory? I do EMDR and it seems like we are searching for something with my therapist but at times I just feel like there isn’t anything there and I don’t have any specific memories of those traumatic events. I do remember facts of consistent systematic physical and emotional abuse, but not too many specific episodes that we could process in our sessions. My therapist also suspects... 26:19 6. How do I stop overeating sweets?! I was anorexic for a couple years and have physically “recovered” but now it seems that my eating disorder has gone in the opposite direction. I have meals, although sometimes minimal ones, and find that I eat / overeat foods that I'm ashamed of (usually sweets or junk food) when I'm alone and/or at night... 34:38 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY A great way to support my channel is to check out our sponsors by using these links: Amazon: https://geni.us/4J8wb Instacart: https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Support on Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 218, licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about negative self talk, the different ways people pleasing can show up in our lives, and how to connect what we rationally know with how we feel. She then discusses whether or not it’s okay to cuss in therapy, how to healthily lose weight when we have an eating disorder, and whether or not a therapist can be biased due to their speciality. Audience Questions: 1. I’m someone who sh!t talks myself a lot and my therapist calls me on it. I noticed in some of your videos your will refer to yourself as “the crazy therapist” or “this weird therapist” I wanted to check is this you just poking a bit of fun at yourself for example when I refer to myself as “the crazy lady” in a fun way (not sh!t talking myself) rather than you talking bad about yourself. 2. Can you explain people pleasing and the different ways it can show up? Is it always a pacifying coping mechanism? I find I get dysregulated when my husband is upset so I tend to do things to make him feel better so I feel okay again, any idea what that behavior could be and why? 3. How do I connect what I rationally know to what I feel? I know the "whys" behind my anxiety and know on a rational level that I shouldn't be anxious about it and know how to argue back and how to decrease the anxiety in the short term but nothing helps in the long term because no amount of "thinking" or fighting back against what my anxiety is... 4. I was wondering if it’s ever ok to swear in therapy? I was brought up to be polite and respectful so I watch my mouth in most situations of course this doesn’t mean I don’t swear I just know the company I can swear in vs The ones I can’t. In therapy we were talking about a past trauma and I have described the person before as someone I hate, not a nice person blah blah blah. I think my therapist noticed that I felt more strongly about this as she asked me if “you could describe him in a few words what would it be?” 5. I need to lose weight. It's not just my opinion, I do have excess weight. My health would benefit from losing weight. I'm pre-diabetic, my heart is not doing its best, also the more I weigh, the more my joints hurt. However, I've had every ED under the sun, including anorexia, and in the past I've managed to have a relapse while having a dietitian and therapist. And it turned into anorexia for a year, binge/purge for another year and now binging for the last half year. Every "diet" I've ever had turns into 2-3 years of suffering. 6. Can a mental health professional be biased by their specialization when making a diagnosis? I was diagnosed with BPD, but when I got a new therapist she said that BPD was a misdiagnosis and I got diagnosed with ASD. The first therapist was more familiar with BPD and the latter was specialized in ASD, and I’m wondering if they could have been biased due to their expertise. Is it difficult to tell apart BPD and ASD? PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? https://geni.us/sva4iUY A great way to support my channel is to check out our sponsors by using these links: Amazon: https://geni.us/4J8wb Instacart: https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Support on Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 217 | This week licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about getting past inner resistance in therapy, how to keep going when we feel like giving up, and what a therapist would do if their client is intellectualizing everything. She then explains what a body memory is and why our trauma memories can be so spotty. Finally, she discusses anxiety about making phone calls, and why we can be so worried about every little thing we do, and believe that people are going to think we are weird. Audience questions: 1. Could you possibly talk about getting past inner resistance in therapy? I’ve been in therapy for about 8 months and feel like we’ve done some amazing work, but have noticed I’m hitting some type of wall within myself that I’m not sure how to get past. It’s like I’ve kind of traveled through all the issues I’ve been conscious of, but now that we’re deeper in I’m realizing there’s a lot going on that I was not aware of... 01:14 2. Hi Kati. How do I keep going? I feel like giving up. I have Major Depressive Disorder. Suicidal thoughts and self injury consume me. I’ve done talk therapy, CBT, DBT, ACT, TMS, and ECT. Nothing has helped. I’ve been hospitalized twice. I’ve been on so many medications I can’t keep track anymore. I feel so alone in this. I do have a psychiatrist, therapist and loving family but they don’t understand... 09:54 3. I was wondering how a therapist would approach working with a client who intellectualizes everything? I find CBT and DBT unhelpful because everything my therapist is saying, while totally true, I've already known about and pieced together myself. I think that's also where I get so stuck with therapy- I KNOW there are these pieces out of place that aren't serving me. I KNOW why I am the way I am, but I don't know what to do about it? 24:54 4. I saw one of your older videos about people not remembering their trauma or remembering it in patches but I’m the opposite, I remember what happened to me in great detail even down to what I was wearing, what they were wearing the day and time everything. The only problem I do have is deciding if what actually happened to me was SA... 33:17 5. I noticed recently that I'm really scared to call people I haven't spoken to in a long time. I know they'd love to hear from me and vice versa if they called me. So what's the hang-up (pun intended)? How do I reduce my anxiety around it? It's just literally a fear of pressing call and waiting while the phone rings. I'm not actually scared to talk to these people. What's that about? How do I make pressing the button or the waiting time while the phone rings before they pick up easier? How do I select who to call? Are there steps I can take to get to that point? 42:46 6. Hey Kati what is it called when you are so concerned with the way you walk, blink , eat, move your mouth when you talk, ect. I feel like I walk weird, and I talk weird. I feel like I’m insecure about my voice being too deep or my laugh being too loud. Just little everyday things. I never hear about this. 46:26 PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠X⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 216 | This week Kati talks about what to do when a therapist forgets our appointment or has to reschedule us last minute, and why that can be so upsetting. She then explains why our self-harm behaviors can change over time, whether or not validation in trauma therapy is good or bad, and the connection between religious trauma and OCD or perfectionism. Then she talks about perfectionism, where it comes from, and why it can permeate our entire life. Finally, she talks about being a highly sensitive person (HSP) and managing our sensory sensitivities. Audience questions: 1. My therapist who I have been seeing for 2+ years double-scheduled me and another family “in crisis” on the same day recently and I had to go home. She was going to meet me the next day (on Saturday morning) but I felt the need to push away and delayed it to next week. I am really attached to her in this push/pull way and I felt really hurt even though I know intellectually she just made a scheduling error. I also felt upset because it triggered my beliefs from childhood that I'm not as important and that I am always second because the other family had worse things going on. Also, what does family in crisis mean? I have had several times where she has forgotten my appointments. I can't tell whether it is my disorganized attachment or truly an unstable therapy relationship? 01:23 2. Can you talk about why self harm behavior changes? I’ve changed places and how I do it a lot since starting and I’m curious as to why that is? I still have my ‘go to’ spot for when there’s nothing more I need than to do it after flashbacks but it’s changed so much and I’m not sure why... 15:41 3. Lately I've seen several references from other therapists talking about trauma therapy, and that validation can sometimes be harmful in trauma therapy. I had a therapist (who had postdoc training specifically in trauma) who I asked for validation, or correction if I was not correct, because I was perceiving him as incongruent. Turns out he was being incongruent (which came out at the end of a 10 months rupture he would acknowledge existed but refused to talk about directly and openly). I spent months in limbo, operating from the perspective that it was my perception that was the issue, which really impacted my perception of reality and trust in myself... 23:29 4. Can you talk more about religious trauma? What effects does the fear of hell have on a child? I developed some OCD tendencies and extreme perfectionism. Is this common? 31:32 5. I seem to be a perfectionist not only when it comes to work but also in regards to every human interaction I have: Whenever I meet with friends or family, I try my absolute best at making them feel validated and comfortable in my present. I strive to be the perfect listener and friend, although I know that that's an unattainable goal. And I'm not very good at it, either. I get so anxious about making "mistakes" and upsetting someone or even... 37:03 6. I have a follow-up to your HSP video. How do I sort out sensory issues? I know I have some sensory sensitivities being an introvert and having social anxiety. But I also have migraines and don't know if sensory issues are because of the migraines or a cause of the migraines, or could I be an HSP, or could I even be on the spectrum. I've tested... 41:42 PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠X⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when your relationship is hard but you can't tell if it's worth saving, or when your trauma history makes your instincts feel unreliable? This week on Ask Kati Anything, licensed therapist Kati Morton, LMFT, answers seven listener questions about the moments when everything feels overwhelming and you can't tell what's the relationship, what's the depression, and what's the trauma talking. Topics in this episode include: when to stay in a relationship versus when to leave, BPD and people pleasing, complex PTSD and attachment wounds, fear of abandonment, codependency, starting therapy when you have bulimia, non-suicidal self-injury, and dissociation, grounding techniques for flashbacks, what healthy love actually looks like, why depression breakthrough symptoms make you feel empty after good experiences, shame spirals and how vulnerability snuffs shame out (Brené Brown's research), rumination, behavioral activation, recovering motivation after emotional burnout, finding yourself again after trauma, inner child work and writing letters to your younger self, and how to respond to unsolicited advice without building resentment. Timestamps: 00:00 Intro 00:56 When to stay vs leave a relationship, attachment, BPD, complex PTSD 12:00 Starting therapy with bulimia, BPD, self-harm, and dissociation 19:00 What healthy love really looks like 25:11 Feeling empty after going out, depression breakthrough symptoms 28:39 Shame spirals, rumination, and Brené Brown on vulnerability 34:25 Lack of motivation after burnout, becoming yourself after trauma 40:56 Inner child work, writing letters to your younger self 45:21 Unsolicited advice and how to respond Submit your question: https://www.youtube.com/@Katimorton/community Follow Kati on Instagram: @katimorton Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton shares some ways we can be more honest with our therapist about our depression, the difference between understanding something intellectually versus feeling it emotionally, and introversion versus social anxiety. She then offers some insight into the ways we can appreciate our bodies, how to get in touch with our emotions, and how to tell where you are feeling them in your body. Audience questions: 1. I find it hard to tell my therapist I feel like I am slipping into another depressive episode. We have done so much work and she has been so proud of me that I feel bad having to say I am slipping. I feel like she will be disappointed in me - even though she'd never admit to it. I want to be honest instead of mask but it's so hard. Why is this so hard for me? 01:10 2. Why is it that intellectually I can understand my adverse childhood experiences and trauma, but emotionally I am an absolute mess? I have been reading many books about ACE's and trauma including both of yours. I bounce between ah ha moments to being unregulated. I can understand why learning was so hard as a child/teenager, my teacher comments that I was "lazy," "not living up to my potential'' or a "daydreamer" are not true, or that I can tune out loud noises or someone talking... 10:46 3. I'm very introverted plus have social anxiety. How can I tell whether I actually need alone time at the moment or am just avoiding it because of the anxiety, but it would be good for me to step outside my comfort zone? 25:11 4. How can I learn to love and appreciate my body? I feel like my body is just this inconvenient attachment I have to lug around all day. I’m irritated when it needs something like food or the bathroom. Sexuality is a completely foreign concept. I’ve done the work to figure out how I got here and obviously there’s many reasons for this. But now I don’t know how to get myself back... 28:09 5. Hi Kati, my question is about getting in touch with your emotions and working through the difficult ones.. for example my therapist told me depression is anger turned inward but everytime I try and get in touch with my anger it doesn’t want to talk to me. I try to work through it during therapy and it doesn’t want to come out. 34:37 6. My therapist tells me that I need to feel my emotions in my body but I can never pinpoint where in my body I feel my emotions, especially positive emotions. 37:38 PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠ A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: ⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL ⁠⁠⁠⁠X⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 214 licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about trauma from a single event versus multiple traumas over time. She also explains why a therapist might ask you if you want to schedule your next appointment, how to stop ruminating, and why self harm can often be linked to a lack of validation. Then she discusses boundaries, why they can be hard to set, uphold, and why they can feel so bad sometimes. audience questions: 1. How does trauma due to a single event (ex: a car accident or rape) differ from trauma from an extended period of time and multiple associated incidents (ex: a soldier in heavy combat during a deployment or being in an abusive relationship over years)? How do symptoms and the overall impact differ? How does the approach that a therapist takes to treat these two different scenarios differ? Is one easier to recover from than the other? 01:30 2. Why, at the end of every session, does my therapist ask me if I want to go ahead and schedule the next appointment or reach out for one later? I know I’m reading too much into this but the thought of her thinking I don’t really need therapy popped into my head. 09:53 3. Please talk about ruminating! It’s brutal, but it’s helped me remember and process narc abuse and bolstered me in my nc decision. But I need to move on, too. Thank you, Kati. 13:46 4. Why is it that self-harmers across the board all seem to struggle with validation of their emotional pain and self-harm? It’s as if we are in an unspoken competition to prove who has the worst pain. I see this in myself, and my OCD accentuates it. So there can be an element of compulsion to my self-harm. The bar keeps moving higher as to what I have to do to myself to prove my emotional pain is severe and the degree of self-harm valid... 18:30 5. Kati I was wondering why you don’t see patients anymore. I know you are busy but you have such great advice. Also I have been wondering why boundaries are hard for me. I broke my boundaries with my therapist and it seems to be hard not to do it again. I think I have an anxious attachment to her and I... 25:26 6. Why does upholding my boundaries feel so defeating? To give insight- I'm in a toxic relationship where my partner is regularly passive aggressive and my boundary is "I cannot tolerate this behavior, I get really panicky and actually don't hear what you're saying, so- whenever you do x, I will leave our conversation and go to my room." I am saving up to eventually leave, because he doesn't see a fault in his behavior and it's getting really exhausting... 31:06 PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠ A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: ⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL ⁠⁠⁠X⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 213, licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about what it means to be your own victim, and how that can be used as a way to victim blame. She then explains avoidant attachment and how it can affect our therapy process, what to do if we are an introvert but also lonely, and how to help a partner dealing with trauma nightmares. She discusses the difference between agoraphobia and complex PTSD, and the effects of having a parent laugh at our self harm struggles. audience questions: 1. How can people say you are your own victim? I have depression and low to null self-esteem …I am trying to make better through therapy and CBT/DBT practices etc. However, recently my friend told me that I am my own victim which I kind of get because of my self esteem issues but my depression is not a choice. It is not like I wake up every morning and say I am going to feel shitty about everything today. In CBT, we learn that you can only control your own behavior but what am I doing wrong to still feel depressed if I am following the so-called rule books and doing opposite action, thought questioning,etc and still feel depressed frequently? I am on medications, have attended outpatient therapy and go to therapy weekly for almost 2 years. So, how am I choosing to be depressed again? 01:33 2. I struggle with avoidant attachment. I’m struggling with feeling like my therapist doesn’t actually care about me and I have a push and pull urge to cancel all my appointments but also I want to increase my appointments. Does this mean she’s not a good match or how do I work through this with her? 10:23 3. How do we cope with being an extreme introvert, but also being very lonely. It's a constant battle and I feel like a walking contradiction! There are often times when I want to go out. And crave connection. Yet as soon as I start to socialize I feel exhausted. I'm socially anxious, which I know may be part of it, but to be clear, I'm talking about the times when I'm calm and comfortable... 15:40 4. I’m hoping for advice on helping ground a partner with extremely severe night terrors/panic attacks. My girlfriend has quite a lot of compounded trauma from past SA, DV, & past life threatening situations. Unfortunately she suffers from these ptsd-esque attacks multiple nights a week. When I mean severe I mean during them she seems to think she is back in old abusive situations, seeing me initially as a threat. She cries, sweats, hyperventilates and trembles, begs “no” and for “it” to stop. 24:21 5. What is the difference between complex PTSD and agoraphobia? Also in terms of treatment? For example going outside makes me anxious because I fear getting kidnapped or harmed in any way but also staying at home alone gives me anxiety because I fear that someone will break in. And I get panicky when I am in crowds but only if I don't see a way out. All in all, I feel paranoid because I "need" to look over my shoulder to make sure, no one is following and I really dread going back to uni. I'd rather stay at home. 32:43 6. Hi Kati, can you please talk about how it affects a child for a parent to laugh and make jokes about their self harm when they notice it? I feel so fucked up from everything that happened and still self harm years later. I also had sexual abuse as a child from a family member that got shushed and never spoken about. 37:37 PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠ A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: ⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL ⁠⁠X⁠⁠ ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Pinterest⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 212, licensed therapist Kati Morton discusses therapy hangovers and if those are even real. She then explains why talking positively to ourselves can give us the icks, why we can not like it if our therapist enjoys their job, and how we can ask our therapist to support us when we are having a hard time. She ends with the reasons we can not want to talk about our eating habits in therapy, and her experience working in community health clinics. audience questions: 1. My question is about “therapy hangovers”. Is it even real? If it is real how does one deal with it and how long should it last? 00:43 2. How does one get used to positive talk when their whole life they have been shit talked to. I get the ick with compliments and when someone shows that they care 09:49 3. Why do I hate it when my therapist says that he loves his job and that he really enjoys working with his patients? When he says that it makes me feel like I'm there for his entertainment. I feel like a circus freak, like I'm only there for him to study and learn from. 13:56 4. I was having a hard time during my last therapy session. I didn’t want to talk much and felt really low. My therapist asked how she can support me. I had no idea what to say so I just told her that I didn’t know. What does she mean when she asks this? What kinds of support can she give during the therapy session? I do remote therapy by the way. 22:15 5. My question is about not wanting to talk about my eating habits in therapy. In one of my first few sessions my therapist asked me about my relationship with food. I’m overweight and I don’t have very healthy eating habits. I would not consider it to be an eating disorder but who knows, a professional might disagree. I told her that I’ve seen dieticians before and I have all the knowledge I need about healthy eating and that I’m not interested in addressing this in therapy. She has diagnosed me with PTSD from S/A that happened when I was 23 (5 years ago) and that’s what I want to work on. The next session she brought up my eating habits again and advised me to see another dietician. I can’t help but feel frustrated. This is not what I’m here for and after being overweight for most of my life (since I was 12), I’m so sick and tired of every health professional bringing this up. Sore throat? It’s your weight. Ingrown toenail? You might want to lose some weight. Dry skin? It’s probably your weight. One time I saw my doctor for pain in my shoulders and left her office with a referral for gastric surgery. And here we are again. Maybe I’m overreacting or even lashing out because it's such a sensitive subject or is it justified that I don’t want to talk about this in therapy? I would love to get your opinion and hear from others who can relate. 32:46 6. As a clinician who watches your videos, I’m wondering if you have ever worked in community mental health. What would you say CMH is doing well, versus what’s not so good? That can be in a systemic sense, a sense of what the clients or clinicians deal with, or just general. Curious for your input! 42:36 PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠Traumatized⁠ ⁠Are u ok?⁠ A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: ⁠Amazon⁠ ⁠Instacart⁠ ⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: ⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠ (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL ⁠X⁠ ⁠TikTok⁠ ⁠Facebook⁠ ⁠Instagram⁠ ⁠Pinterest⁠ ⁠Patreon⁠ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast episode 211, licensed therapist Kati Morton let’s us know if there is anything we do that makes people think they can trauma dump on us, why we can feel at our worst in the evenings, and her thoughts and experiences with internal family systems therapy. She also tells us how to get out of a depressive episode, how to deal with codependency in friendships, and how we can actually feel our feelings. audience questions: 1. I'd like to ask if there is anything I do that makes people think they can trauma dump on me. I grew up as my parent's therapist and feel like my friends do the same thing. Also no one ever seems to care about how I am. I've been depressed and struggling with passive suicidal ideation and Eating disorders. I'm obviously tired and struggling but no one bothers to ask about me and what is going on. Am I doing something wrong and what can I do? 00:47 2. Why is it that someone who has experienced trauma, aka me, might continue to feel overwhelmed by the emotions of it all when alone in the evenings, even when there is no threat or trigger that I can find? I normally distract myself a lot, but I then just end up not dealing with anything- I’m either all or nothing. (Ps: Due to circumstances I’m currently not having sessions with my counselor). Sorry, I hope this makes sense. 09:23 25 Coping Skills 14:00 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=td4LQ2rxVa0&pp=ygUca2F0aSBtb3J0b24gMjUgY29waW5nIHNraWxscw%3D%3D 3. I know you mentioned before that you were starting your own IFS work, and I was wondering your thoughts on it so far? (if you're ok with sharing!) I started with my therapist about 2 months ago, and I really struggle to take it seriously and let go enough for it to be effective. I can't seem to imagine the different versions of me, and the talking to little me part seems so juvenile and awkward that I feel like I don't take it seriously and it isn't really effective. The catch is, I'm people-pleasing my way through it. I'm just playing along with what my therapist says, and I feel like I'm gaslighting her into believing it's helping. I feel like my issue is that I just can't let go and actually let it actually help because I feel so silly. Just wondering if you ever ran into this, or if you had any suggestions on navigating this because I truly want it to work! Thanks for all you do, you rock! 14:53 PARTS WORK IN THERAPY 15:07 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gymev70IGiI 4. Do you know what I can do to get out of a depressive episode or at least make sure it doesn't happen at certain times? This may sound very stupid and maybe there is nothing i can do. I have struggled with these episodes for almost a year now, but only in the last few months they have become so recent that they scare me. I have more lows than good times and even in my good times a tiny thing can disrupt me and send me straight back to my low... 24:35 5. Hi Kati. I was wondering if you would talk about codependency within friendships. 32:23 Kati's inner-child workshop 39:40 https://katimorton.com/the-shop 6. Everyone keeps telling me it’s important to ‘feel my feelings’ and acknowledge my grief (I had an accident so grieving the life I won’t have now) but I don’t understand how to or what that really means. Could you explain how I can try to move on with my life and... 40:31 PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized Are u ok? A great way to support my channel is to visit our sponsors by using these links: Amazon Instacart ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X TikTok Facebook Instagram Pinterest Patreon PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton explains how we can discover our true self, if CPTSD is a lifelong struggle, and why we can want our therapist to worry about us. She also talks about whether or not we can develop an addiction to psychotherapy and why being pampered as a child can cause us to feel helpless a lot. Finally, she helps us figure out how to support people with dependent personality disorder without enabling them. 01:05 Ask Kati Anything ep.210 podcast summary 01:42 How can you discover your true self? In my last therapy session, we discovered just how much I get my self-worth, and feelings of love and appreciation, from helping others. Helping around the house, overworking, generally never sitting down to enjoy my own time. I'm now at the point that I don't know who I am or what I like. How do you start to figure out your true self? 08:38 My question is, with medication, therapy twice a week, and EMDR, will you continue to have C-PTSD symptoms for the rest of your life? Does it ever get to a point where you completely resolve most, if not all, of your symptoms and not require therapy and medication, or, is this a life sentence? 13:02 I want my therapist to worry about me. I wish I could tell her this straight up. But if I do, she'll stop worrying about me. It's like.... Love (I guess?) I've never received and to be honest... I enjoy it. But. There's a huge "BUT." Me making her more and more worried to her as a therapist essentially means that therapy she's providing is not working, right? And that she can and actually should terminate me. Right?!? Which is my biggest worry. That she's gonna leave me. And then my little mind comes up with "Whatever, I'm unlovable anyways so it's fine. I'd leave me too if I was her. I'm not worthy of love. I'm just a pain in the ass and she puts up with me only because I pay her." And then there comes a point where I want to push her away because I've come up with "she doesn't love me so there's no point to get sicker", which to her probably seems like I'm getting better. And. Then she wants (actually suggests but in my mind it translates to "wants") to reduce our sessions from twice a week to only once. And to me it means that she's actually gonna leave because I'm worrying her less. Not more. Such a great mind fuckery. Sorry. It is though. And then I want to get sicker again. Oh. I have anorexia. I don't think I mentioned it anywhere. Is there a way to stop this? 19:57 Is it possible to develop an addiction to psychotherapy? I think I might have it, because I don't have any other safe places where I can express my emotions, or be me. Unfortunately, despite my efforts, it's not always possible to live in a happy environment, or leave it. 25:10 Could you please talk about learned helplessness due to having been spoiled and pampered as a child? I can't get myself to be active and struggle to feel responsible for my own life. 30:16 Could you talk about how family members can love and support people with dependent personality disorder without enabling them? Where is the line from support to enabling?? PUBLISHED BOOKS Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? http://bit.ly/2s0mULy A great way to support my channel is to check out our sponsors buy using these links: Amazon: https://geni.us/4J8wb Instacart: https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X: https://twitter.com/KatiMorton TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@katimorton Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katimorton1/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katimorton Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/katimorton1/ Support on Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton explains why a therapist won’t just tell you what you want to hear, and how to get over the feeling that they are only being kind because you are paying them. She also talks about inner child work and why it can be so tough to do, what to do if therapy isn’t helping and we feel worse, and some tips for emotion regulation. Finally, she tells us what to do if we are assaulted by our therapist, and whether or not we play a role in our own suffering. 00:44 How do I believe the things my therapist says and not just think she is saying them because I am paying her? I’ve been in therapy over two years and I’m just now discussing CSA with her. I find myself doubting everything she says when she gives me validation, like she’s just saying what I wanna hear and not really being honest. I want to receive everything she says. How do I get past this? 06:08 Hi Kati, Love your channel and both of your books! I'm wondering why I'm having such a hard time connecting to my inner child? I have some childhood trauma I'm working on in therapy, but I can't seem to do the inner child work. I don't really like my inner child, she's vulnerable. Do you have any tips to help overcome this hurdle? Thank you for all that you do! 15:31 I've been in therapy for almost two years now, and I feel like my problems have just been getting worse. No matter what I try to do, my mental health either stays the same or doesn't get any better. I'm having a hard time figuring out if it might just be because I'm scared to get better. I know that you might suggest finding another therapist, but the problem is that for some reason I'm extremely attached to my therapist and I'm not sure if I would be able to function without her in my life. My entire existence relies on her presence at the moment, and I feel like therapy is... 21:47 What techniques are available to help you get through significant emotional dysregulation short term (the next few hours)? I find the whole ‘opening up’ in therapy very emotionally difficult, so I write out what I need to say between the sessions, leading to an escalating emotional state prior to each session …. Unfortunately, I had to cancel a session … I didn’t react well. (I was very surprised how difficult I found it). I became very dysregulated and spent half a day with significant dissociation that I couldn’t “coping skill” my way out of. Do you have any tips for how to handle in the short term, having an ‘event’ that is a particular stressor, when the coping skills are not enough? 27:18 Do you have any advice about dealing with being assaulted by a therapist in session? So I developed an ED in college as my depression and anxiety worsened along with it. I worked up the courage to go to the college provided counselor, but because of the program's limitations and understaffing the only available one was a male. I find much more comfort with women so I really didn't want to but... 33:29 I recently read a quote saying, "healing also means taking responsibility for the role you play in your own suffering." Can you please explain this to me? --------- PUBLISHED BOOKS ⁠Traumatized⁠ Are u ok?⁠ The best way to support this channel is to check out my sponsors and buy using these links: Amazon Instacart ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist: https://betterhelp.com/kati (enjoy 10% off your first month) SOCIAL X TikTok Facebook Instagram Pinterest Patreon PARTNERSHIPS Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything podcast ep. 208, licensed therapist Kati Morton explains how we can get past the feeling that our relationship with our therapist is “fake,” how to support our students without being triggered ourselves, and how to know if we are retraumatizing ourselves. She then explains how we can know if we are a narcissist, what it means to process our emotions, and what we can do if we are ashamed of our life. Audience questions: 1. How do I get past the feeling that the relationship with my therapist is “fake”? I have heard you say that you should feel ‘validated’ and ‘seen’ by your therapist, but I can’t get past the fact that the only reason she is talking to me is because I am paying her. Maybe this is my ‘child of emotional neglect’ talking, but the idea that anyone is interested in helping me is very alien but that doesn’t change the fact that my therapist isn’t my friend, never will be, and wouldn’t choose to talk to me if I didn’t hand over a lot of money. What am I missing? 01:11 2. I work at a school as a teacher and I also work for the before and after program. I do a lot at the school. I work with a lot of different types of students. When I was a little kid I had a lot of trauma. When any kid comes to school with a bruise I think the worse. Sometimes it’s hard for me to see the kiddos cry. Some of the kids do come from rough backgrounds. They tell me things like no one loves me and cares about me. I try my best to let them know I care without crossing the student teacher boundaries. When I get home I just cry because I feel so little all over again. Because I know how they feel. My question is how do I show my students that I care without emotionally hurting myself or triggering myself. 12:26 11:01 ATTACHMENT WORKSHOP 3. How do I know if I am retraumatizing myself? (As an add-on comment: my ED was related to trauma. I worked and thought I did overcome the problem with eating. When my eating disorder suddenly came back, I wondered if this could be a sign of being retraumatized? 20:26 4. How do I know if I am narcissistic? And what is real empathy? 25:17 5. I have a question about processing emotions, feeling them and moving through them. How much is too much, and how much is not enough? And mainly, how does this change when it comes to processing something big like grief? I lost two people very close to me recently. I always try to stuff down emotions and don’t want to feel them, so I’m trying really hard to notice and feel them with this because I know it’s healthy and I need to. Sometimes it’s constant and it’s wayyy too much for me to handle and sometimes it’s nothing. What’s a healthy amount of emotion? 27:58 Hi Kati, what can I do if I feel ashamed of my life? Ashamed of what happened to me, ashamed of how much it affects me today and how little the events really were... I'm so desperate about everything that isn't working anymore and everything I would so deeply wish but can't do anymore.... And the pressure from others that I should functionate again is immense. How can I come out of this "being ashamed of my life"? 38:55 My books: Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? http://bit.ly/2s0mULy Online therapy: While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THIS CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS Instacart: https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB Amazon: https://geni.us/4J8wb Partnerships: Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please read: If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything episode 207, licensed therapist Kati Morton discusses eating disorder recovery and why it can be hard for us to let go of it completely. She also explains why we can have romantic feelings for our therapist, and if we should tell them about it. Then she gets into how we can ask our parents to get us in to see a therapist, how to return to regular exercise after ED recovery, and how to tell people about our upsets without oversharing. Finally, Kati digs into self-deprecating thoughts and how to get out of that cycle. Questions: 00:53 Q1 - I’m currently going through ED recovery and am having a hard time parting with it, because many of the behaviors (healthy eating and exercise) almost feel part of my identity. I feel like I... 19:12 Q2 - Should I tell my therapist about the romantic feelings and thoughts I have for her? If so, how should I broach this topic, and is she likely to terminate me? 19:30 What is Transference In Therapy? (video mentioned by Kati) 24:18 Q3 - ....please could you give me some advice on how I could let my parents know about all this without it being overwhelming or receiving negative responses as I am only 14 so I can’t really leave. Also when is it bad enough to ask for something like therapy... 30:55 Q4 - How do I get back to normal after ED regarding physical activity? What does a healthy active lifestyle look like without overdoing it? 34:48 Q5 - I have a question about sharing our internal upsets with relatives. I catch myself lying about how I’m doing for fear of oversharing. I don’t want to freak the other person out, burden them with my issues, or leave them feeling guilty for... 41:48 Q6 - I constantly am having self deprecating thoughts and sometimes can't even tell my own feelings in a moment. I have a mother who is constantly talking down to me, always getting mad at me about little things, and always has to yell at me about something. I mentioned that I think I might be dealing with emotional abuse to my therapist, and she agreed and said she thinks I am as well. She told me that if I wanted to try and better the relationship I have with my mom she'd help me. But, it seems that as time has gone on the way my mom talks to me and treats me has gotten worse, and it feels like it'll never get better. I'm not sure what to do, and it feels like I'm stuck. My therapist wanted me to use... MY BOOKS Traumatized Are u ok? My affiliate links (shop with them to help the podcast) ⁠Instacart⁠ https://instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB ⁠Amazon⁠ https://geni.us/4J8wb ONLINE THERAPY | While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon | https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Partnerships Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Ask Kati Anything, licensed therapist Kati Morton discusses the line between normal sibling relationships and emotional abuse, shutting down in therapy, and how to know if we are oversharing. She explains how mental illnesses can sometimes follow patterns in their symptomatology, why we can struggle with self care, and our urge to diffuse situations with laughter. Questions & timestamps: 1. Where is the line between normal sibling relationships and emotional abuse? My therapist seems to think my sister is emotionally abusive, but aren’t all siblings aholes to each other? 00:36 2. My question is about shutting down in therapy and being unable to talk during a therapy session. Recently I have been looking for a new therapist, but I haven't been able to find someone that I'm comfortable with. The problem is that in the first 1-2 sessions I shut down and feel unable to talk. Different therapists handle this differently, but for the most part they just let me sit there. I have spent entire sessions in shut down mode and we just sit there doing nothing.... 05:41 3. I'm wondering if you can talk a bit about "oversharing". I feel like it's a relatively-new term to me, and I'm wondering how to tell if someone is doing it. Is it OK to have some people we tell literally EVERYTHING to, even when it's TMI? Or are there some things that should always be private? In cases where we've... 15:03 4. Why is it the case that mental illnesses "follow patterns"? In the sense that they can be categorized into illnesses. Like why is it "natural" to get addicted or get an ED when something is missing in life. Why are these patterns natural consequences that happen for so many people even if one does not know of the existence of these illnesses?" 25:19 5. My question is why do I have trouble engaging in self care and having a hard time finding coping skills that work for me? I have things that I have enjoyed doing in the past but just can't seem to do any of them. Can I count tv watching and internet scrolling self care? I know I need some coping skills if I want to deal with childhood trauma (not sure I want to go there). Can coping skills also be self care and vice versa? 30:50 6. I'm an awkward laugher. My way of diffusing situations used to be to make them lighthearted- that was literally my role. It's so ingrained into me now, that it's just instinctively what I go to, even when it's really not appropriate. I feel like I've also used it so much in every part of my life, that I don't really feel anything. Everything is just... a big joke? I feel like I physically can't even stop it now. I don't even know where to begin in correcting this, or if it's even fixable now so any tips would be appreciated! 36:18 -------- MY BOOKS (in stores now) ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠BetterHelp⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠PATREON⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Ask Kati Anything, licensed marriage and family therapist Kati Morton welcomes keynote speaker and bestselling author Ginny Priem to discuss the heavy toll of over-functioning and the path to reclaiming your identity. Ginny shares her powerful Unsubscribe Framework, a tool designed to help you filter out the noise and set firm boundaries in both your professional and personal life. From uncovering a partner's shocking double life to navigating the complexities of narcissistic family dynamics, Kati and Ginny explore how to heal from betrayal and the necessity of choosing peace over toxic loyalty.  Shopping with our sponsors helps support Ask Kati Anything • ZocDoc - visit Zocdoc | Find a Doctor Near You | Book Doctors Online to find and instantly book a doctor you love today! https://www.zocdoc.com/KATI • Ka’Chava - Go to Ka’Chava: https://kachava.com/ and use code KATI for 15% off your first order • Reddit - Download the Reddit app today! Topics covered: The Unsubscribe Pillars: Learn how to use Block, Manage, Swap, and Mute to protect your time and energy. Healing from Betrayal: Ginny opens up about discovering her partner's systemic deception and how it became the catalyst for her life's work. Identifying Narcissistic Abuse: Understanding DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender) and recognizing the signs of gaslighting. The Reality of No-Contact: A candid look at the difficult decision to go no-contact with a narcissistic parent. Living with Grief: Shifting the perspective from "moving through" grief to learning how to grow your life around it. Rebuilding Self-Trust: Why spending time with yourself (not just by yourself) is the key to fixing a "broken picker".   Ginny Priem: Book: Unsubscribe: Why Letting Go is the Secret to Getting Ahead Podcast: Unsubscribe with Ginny Priem Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton explains why it can feel so bad when our therapist is proud of us, how we can end therapy when we have attachment issues, and how therapists alter their treatment depending on our diagnoses. She then talks about why an eating disorder often comes with a food obsession, what we can do when we are terrified of people not liking us, and finally, she walks us through what to do with our complicated feelings towards an abusive parent. Questions & timestamps At the end of a super emotionally charged session with my therapist where I shared something really difficult that I’ve never talked about with anyone, my therapist said, “You’re doing it!” I knew she meant that I was healing but I felt really shitty during the session and for days afterwards. How do you know when you’ve worked through something and have fully processed it? 1:23 Could you please talk about ending therapy while having attachment issues? My therapist is pregnant and will be going on maternity leave in a few weeks. I've actually been thinking about ending therapy for quite a while but the fact that my therapist is now leaving and effectively ending the therapy has triggered feelings of abandonment in me. I suddenly feel mentally really bad again. 12:28 I was wondering if therapists change the ways of doing therapy based off of the diagnosis the client may have. Would a therapist work differently with a client who had Bipolar 2 vs a client who has ADHD or from one who has OCD? I hope this question isn’t too complicated and I just want you to know I love your work! I am always excited to see your videos every week! 22:43 Why is it that restrictive eating disorders often include an obsession with food, even though it’s the thing we’re avoiding? I’ve been highly restricting for about 2 months and have become kind of obsessed with grocery stores. I go anywhere from 3-5 times a week, usually making small purchases each time. I have a ton of snacks and “binge food” in my room that I’ve accumulated, but don’t eat. It’s like I’m punishing myself by having food in sight that I don’t allow myself to have. I spend so much time on grocery apps/websites analyzing nutrition labels and filling imaginary carts with things I wish I could eat. All of this takes up so much of my time and headspace. 25:58 I’m terrified of people not liking me. I don’t know why but if I feel like if I mess up or am annoying or something people aren’t going to like me and they won’t want to hangout with me anymore and they will leave me. I'm so afraid of this that I... 31:09 Can you talk about dealing with conflicted feelings towards abusive parents? I need distance to feel safe enough to work through trauma from csa, but at the same time I do miss them, love them and don‘t want them to be sad. I feel like a huge disappointment to them. I don‘t know how to keep the relationship, how to be a good daughter. 37:42 ______________ MY BOOKS (in stores now) ⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠ ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, ⁠⁠⁠⁠BetterHelp⁠⁠⁠⁠ can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠PATREON⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton explains the difference between depression and general disappointment. She also gives us options for ways to reward ourselves that don’t involve food or spending a lot of money, and discusses the reasons we may feel too broken for therapy. Then she offers some ways people pleasers can do the necessary things that will end up hurting someone’s feelings, and the difference between rumination and healthy processing. Finally, she explains what fear of rejection is and how it differs from fear of abandonment. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS 1. My question is about distinguishing between depression (or another mental disorder) and general disappointment or dissatisfaction with life. What would you say to someone who was not feeling happy about being alive but also not necessarily depressed or mentally ill? What if you just feel you don't like life and you don't particularly enjoy it? What if your dissatisfaction with life is just a combination of your personality, your resilience and... 2. How can I reward myself? I had an eating disorder and I feel like I am shopping too much. How can I reward myself without subconsciously supporting old behavior? 3. I feel like I’m too broken for therapy. I have a fear of abandonment and I think it makes therapy really hard for me. I find it so hard to actually get help because I’m so afraid of losing my therapist. I don’t want to open up and get attached because I know it’s not forever. And the more I share the more afraid I am that she is going to leave me. I can’t stop thinking about... 4. Do you have any tips for people pleasers who are struggling to do things that are necessary but will upset other people? Like breaking up with someone you’re dating when you can tell it isn’t working out or setting boundaries with a friend you care about but who is taking advantage of your willingness to help? 5. Could you talk about the difference between healthy emotional processing vs rumination? 6. Hey Kati, can you explain the fear of rejection vs fear of abandonment. I feel like a lot of people think it’s the same. I have CPTSD. I don’t fear abandonment. I actually expect it... ______________ MY BOOKS (in stores now) ⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠ ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, ⁠⁠⁠BetterHelp⁠⁠⁠ can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠PATREON⁠⁠⁠ https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS ⁠⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton answers audience questions about when and why we would need to reach out to our therapist in between sessions, whether or not therapists judge our “crazy” thoughts, and the difference between fidgeting and self injury. She then talks about dissociation, the different diagnoses and symptoms, and how to work through it. Finally, she discusses why it can be hard for us to get away from our abusers, and some nice ways of telling people we can’t be there for them right now. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS 1. Hi Kati! My therapist always says that I can reach out to her any time that I’m in crisis. I never do even when I’m feeling really down, anxious, and/or dysregulated because I’m not and have never had suicidal or self-harming behaviors. But I’ve gone through some really tough emotions and thoughts when I wanted to reach out. What does it mean to be “in crisis” and when is it appropriate to reach out to your therapist outside of your sessions? 2. What goes on in a therapists head when their client is saying something that the therapist thinks is “crazy”? Does the therapist ever have a hard time not judging or showing judgment to their client by accident? Thanks for all you do and the time and effort you put in every week! 3. My question is about anxiety fidgeting and self injury. In my therapy sessions, especially if we are talking about a hard topic, I tend to pinch and scratch my hands, to the point where I leave with red marks and sometimes bruises on them. I don’t realize I’m doing it because I’m so focused on the topic at hand and explaining my thoughts clearly to my therapist. Is this just anxiety? Or is this self injury? Either way I don’t know if it’s bad or typical or just plain fidgeting. Thanks for everything! 4. I dissociate a lot. Sometimes I do things that I have no memory of. Thankfully, nothing bad. A lot of times when I dissociate I become a little girl. She emails my therapist, colors Winnie the Pooh pictures for her. Sometimes I am like a very angry teenager. I don’t have DID that we know of, but something is happening. There are also times that I feel as if I’m not really me being a mom to my kids, but I cover it so well that they... 5. I hope you don't mind me asking this question again as it didn't get picked the last time. Why is it so hard to walk away from your abusers? In my case it is moving out from home. (I'm in my early twenties). 6. I’m the friend that people tend to come to when they need to vent. All of my friends and family know if they need someone I’ll be there! Sometimes though I get overwhelmed with that. Is there a nice way to explain that I am not able to listen to them vent right now? Thanks Kati!! ______________ MY BOOKS (in stores now) ⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠ ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, ⁠⁠BetterHelp⁠⁠ can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠PATREON⁠⁠ https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS ⁠⁠Instacart⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On Ask Kati Anything ep. 202 licensed therapist, Kati Morton talks about job-related trauma, medical trauma, and managing life and expectations when we struggle with depression and bouts of suicidal thoughts. She then digs into some tips for opening up in therapy, what it really looks like to ask for help, and explains what eldest daughter syndrome is. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS 1. My question is about job-related trauma. I’m a school crisis interventionist and work with students who can become really dysregulated and physical. Could this physical aggression towards me be considered traumatic? 2. Could you talk more about how to handle life if you struggle with chronic bouts of depression and/or suicidality but you still need to achieve goals and keep your job? It's one thing to take time off when you're acutely struggling, but an entirely different one to you struggling for years on end and even with the perfect treatment (in my case, at least) still often have many hours, days, even weeks when you can barely get anything done. 3. Any tips to open up in therapy? I feel like I tense up every session and no words come out, so I end up just not talking all session even though I want to. I trust my therapist so I know it’s not that, yet I still don’t feel comfortable talking and don’t know what to do about it. 4. Please Kati talk about medical trauma while battling chronic Terminal illness & how to beat it..I'm currently in This situation..I honestly want to give up having meds, seeing drs or even eating.. I'm exhausted from so many appointments for so many years to end up sicker than expected & on top of it being treated badly due to my rare illness..I'm very unwell mentally more than physically, there's no known cure for my diseases and I even lost my ability to speak as a result... 5. Hi Kati, for those of us who couldn't rely on anyone as a child. What do people mean by asking for help or asking for support? What would it mean if I asked for help? What could someone do to help make it better? What are the options? As a child, I have learnt that if I freeze, it will work itself out. But if I were to stand up, I would get hurt... 6. I was wondering if you could share your thoughts on "eldest daughter syndrome". Is this something that can happen even if your parents weren't uninvolved or unable to show up for important aspects? Is it even real/factually supported? MY BOOKS (in stores now) ⁠Traumatized⁠ ⁠Are u ok?⁠ ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, ⁠BetterHelp⁠ can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠ PATREON⁠ https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS ⁠Instacart⁠ ⁠Amazon⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton explains her feelings about not seeing clients anymore, why some of us can’t stop thinking about our therapist no matter how hard we try, and why we can obsess over eating disorder content. She then talks about why our struggles can be inconsistent, how to deal with a child who has BPD, and the effects of financial trauma. Finally, she explains what emotional neglect is and how it can play out as we grow up. Ask Kati Anything audience questions for podcast ep. 201 1. I was wondering if you could tell us more about how you feel about not working with clients anymore, the reasons you've stopped and whether you ever miss it? 2. I wanted to ask why I can't stop thinking about my therapist no matter how hard I try. I spend hours of my day either googling her up, or trying to find a way to hear her voice or find a picture. I feel horrible for invading her privacy, but no matter what I do I can't seem to stop. Even though I find the same things online every time I search her up, I still continue to do it for hours hoping to find something new. Afterwards I feel extremely guilty and I can't sleep, and I want to punish myself... 3. I would love some feedback on why I seem to obsess over eating disorder content. Lately I have been obsessed with books, movies, & videos about EDs. I have gone through several periods like this in the past (the obsession seems to only last for like a week each time). I can’t seem to focus on anything else, which makes it hard for me to concentrate at work & to talk to my husband about how I am doing. 4. Why do I feel like my struggles are never consistent? I feel like one week I’m struggling a lot with my ED, another week I can’t stop thinking and getting urges to SH (and then feeling guilty for always doing it), and then a different week I have breakdowns, panic attacks, and crying spells due to some traumatic things that happened not so long ago. 5. Hi Kati...this is a difficult question to ask. Almost 5 years ago our young adult son moved out of our home leaving only a note that said "moved" on it. He cut off all communication with his dad and me and has very little with his older sister. A year prior to him leaving he was diagnosed with BPD after self admitting himself to a mental health facility. When he came home we had a roller coaster year with him, especially me. I am struggling badly with the idea of never seeing him again...and am filled with shame and guilt. I don't want this last several chapters of my life to be this...I am now agoraphobic, lonely and so depressed. I need joy back in my life. Who knows, perhaps by writing this comment I will find my joy. 6. My question is about the constant worry about finances. I’m hoping this question may resonate with someone else out there. So, for as long as I can remember I’ve worried about finances so much so, that I avoid spending money on myself most of the time. If I receive a gift card from someone during the holidays I sometimes use it to buy someone else a gift for a future occasion. I often experience a pain that feels almost physical when spending money on something that isn’t a recurring expense. This is typically followed by... 7. Is it emotional neglect if your parents never played with you as a child and didn't tell you how to use feminine hygiene products when you got your period and don't share anything about themselves? MY BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized Are u ok? ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati PATREON https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ YOU CAN SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATE LINKS Instacart Amazon PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist, Kati Morton talks about why cleaning can be so hard when we are depressed, the reasons we can be depressed and still function at work or school. She then discusses how we actually go about processing emotions and traumas, and why we often want to retreat to our rooms when we don’t want to deal with others in the house. She also explains what she does when a patient with an eating disorder doesn’t want to get better, and how we can rebuild trust with our therapist after a difficult session.  Ask Kati Anything audience questions for podcast ep. 200  1. Why is cleaning so hard when depressed? On a scientific and spiritual level. This can be your room, body, car, etc. (COMMENTS: Same but I have autism as well as depression and even when I break tasks down into smaller tasks the number of things I need to do just seems so overwhelming... 2. Can you be “functional “ at work and deeply depressed at the same time? Sometimes I wonder if I’m just lazy when it comes to things that aren’t required of me. 3. How do you process emotions and traumas? I have been told many times that I need to deal with emotions and process them instead of ignoring them, and it makes sense but I don’t understand how to do that.  4. I find myself retreating to my room a lot as a safe space when I don't want to deal with others in the house. Is this an unhealthy way of coping?  5. How would you react if you had a new client who engages in disordered eating but doesn’t want to change their behaviors? I started seeing a new therapist 3 weeks ago and it’s been going well so far. I have so many things that I want to work on!  6. Hi Kati! My question is about rebuilding trust with my therapist after a tough therapy appointment. My therapist told me that her clinical “sense of things” thinks I would benefit from inpatient ED treatment. I’m a teacher and could not even imagine taking more than a couple days off because I’m sick or need to take a personal day. I worry that she will judge me for continuing outpatient treatment with her. I’m also worried that my honesty with... MY BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized   Are u ok?    ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati MERCHANDISE  https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ PATREON https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ You Can Support this Podcast by shopping with our affiliates: Instacart Amazon PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney - linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today Kati interviews Gabe Howard! He is a mental health advocate, speaker, and host of the inside bipolar podcast. They discuss bipolar disorder, being hospitalized for our mental illness, and the symptoms of bipolar disorder no one wants to talk about. They have an honest conversation about treatment options, managing symptoms, and breaking down that mental health stigma. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS 1. Hello, I have bipolar 2 and was wondering if he ever felt like he had a "breakthrough" in his bipolar disorder. Not necessarily a manic episode, but a true moment of "oh....I CAN live life like this and it CAN be enjoyable". I recently had this and it's been life changing for me. I look at every day I'm alive so differently now. 2. Hi Gabe, have you gone into the hospital voluntarily or not? Are you allowed to leave when you want or do the doctors get to decide how long to keep you? Has being in the hospital been helpful or has it been more helpful to stay outpatient?Checkout Kati on Gabe's Podcast: https://megaphone.link/RVOHE7584755428 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton talks about loneliness and why we can still feel lonely even after spending time with those we love. She also explains why we can struggle to express upset to those who hurt us, and almost prefer to turn it in on ourselves. Then Kati offers some ideas on how to better deal with goodbyes and endings, and times of year when more people reach out for help. She digs into ways we can love people who are hurtful to us from a distance, ECT treatment and its effects, and feelings of abandonment in our relationships. Ask Kati Anything episode 198 audience questions: Loneliness - mine isn’t the ‘simply be around like-minded people’ type. It’s this deep feeling - not always dark, but when it gets dark, it really feels awful, quite dangerous as well. Can you please talk about types of loneliness? Because in trying to talk about my loneliness, I often find myself in a lonelier spot.... When I get upset with someone else, I tend to feel the urge to punish myself for being upset rather than holding them accountable. Why is this happening? It’s totally destroying my mental health and relationships. I'm looking for some tips on how I can better cope with goodbyes and endings. It's almost unreal how upset I get, even when something doesn't really mean that much to me. A co-worker I'm not even close to can retire, or a neighbor I rarely talk to can move, and it devastates me. Or a restaurant can close, or a TV show can end, and I feel sad and anxious at the thought of something being "over"... Hi Kati! I was wondering as a therapist, if there are certain times of year that you tend to get more patients. I imagine that with health insurance deductibles resetting January 1, that many people would either start therapy or stop therapy around New Years. I also wonder if seasonal depression plays a role in this. Just curious, thanks! Can you talk about ”loving at a distance” when one has to get away from their toxic home or parents, but still loves them and that it is possible to set boundaries and have one's own life without them in a healthy way? I’ve been suffering from depression for quite some time and have tried many different kinds of treatments. I started doing ECT about 2 years ago and am currently on maintenance. I am embarrassed to admit it, but if I am honest with myself, I’ve kept going for a while largely for the anesthesia. I might also have developed an attachment to the care that I get as I am being prepped for the treatment. I really struggle a lot with feeling a sense of abandonment when I'm (impatiently) waiting for a response to a text from a friend, or when I don't hear from them for a while, I automatically think the worst has happened!! For context, I've recently been diagnosed with ADHD, along with anxiety, depression & I strongly suspect CPTSD as well. Sometimes distraction or "radical acceptance" works (I have done some CBT therapy already), but not always. Any suggestions Kati? -------- MY BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized Are u ok? ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati MERCHANDISE https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ PATREON https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING WITH OUR AFFILIATES Instacart Amazon PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This episode of Ask Kati Anything tackles the bittersweet realities of unfulfilled expectations and lost dreams. Grieving the life you thought you’d have, parentification, emotional incest and spoucification. We also discuss why we can crave attention from people and hope that they see how badly we are doing. Then we dive into my thoughts on mental health care workers struggling with their own mental health issues, and why we can struggle to share anything with our parents. Finally, Kati offers ways to be more excited and hopeful for the future. Join Kati Morton in this empathetic and insightful episode as she guides us through navigating complex emotions, reclaiming lost selves, and ultimately finding hope amidst unlived lives. Audience questions: How to grieve the life you thought you'd have. i.e not having children, 40 and single/never married... Could you please talk a bit about parentification? I believe that it can be the root of many problems and I can't find that much about it. I feel like I was raised as... Is it "normal " that I constantly crave attention from some people (my favorite friend, therapist, doctors...), and that I wished that they could see how bad I'm doing (eating disorder). Hi Kati! Would love to hear your take on mental health care workers who also struggle with their mental health. I volunteer for a suïcide hotline, work as a mental health professional and struggle with my own mental health. For example ptsd and depression. It seems that a lot of mental health professionals have struggled or... Dear Kati, My parents are nice to me. However, I never feel comfortable telling my parents anything, I've become a very private person, I crave affection, but for some reason I don't feel comfortable receiving it from my parents. I also always feel distanced from them, and for some reason I never let them see me upset, or support me. I keep pushing them away even though How can I feel excited and hopeful about my future? I am someone who lives and looks into the past a lot. A friend suggested that it could be that way because somewhere I don't feel excited about my future which is why I feel maybe all the excitement was... MERCHANDISE https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ MY BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized Are u ok? ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati PATREON https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING... Instacart Amazon PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week Kati talks about dealing with depression and family obligations, how to deal with having past suicidal thoughts on your permanent record, and how to deal when going home causes us to revert back to an old version of ourselves. She also explains why anxiety can cause us to regress to a younger age, why positive emotions can be hard to accept and process, and how emotional neglect can affect us as we get older. Ask Kati Anything ep. 196 audience questions: 1. I’m a 25 year old male and a HSP. I’ve been struggling with depression the last 3 years of Uni. As much as I would like to continue my studies, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to focus on anything. Despite my best efforts to concentrate on schoolwork, I experience mental blocks that persistently cloud my mind. I’ve talked with the school therapist without much progress...2. Hi Kati, I have had “suicidal ideation” in my permanent chart since last year. I also have “chronic suicidality” written in there. I’m also on 6 psych meds just for MDD and anxiety. When I see new doctors, I’m worried they will not listen to my concerns about anything for the rest of my life due to my chart containing so much negative information. I still have suicidal ideation but not like that specific day I was hospitalized. This is the one reason I find having labels and a “current health issues” list so frustrating. What can I do to prevent doctors from writing me off?3. I'm heading home from college soon for break, and I'm so not ready. It's like my family members are completely different people, and in a way my entire house feels like a weird alternate reality with strangers in it. I know this probably sounds dramatic because these people are my family and I have lived with them in that house for almost my entire life...4. Is it normal to age regress during panic attacks or would this be something else? It’s hard to explain but I’ve been having what feel like panic attacks but I come out of it feeling and acting like a small child, seeking comfort from things like blankets and stuffed animals. This makes it feel more like a flashback but nothing during it would suggest that. 5. I was wondering why it is so hard for me to accept and process positive emotions. Last week was my birthday and my students were super excited and most brought a picture, handmade card, flowers, small gifts. My fellow teachers and staff were super nice and I was super uncomfortable with all that attention. Wanted to happy cry, but couldn't cry. Also I have had people come observe me multiple times and leave positive compliments and just can't accept that what they wrote is true. Am I the only one who suffers from this?6. I grew up with parents who never comforted me as a child. There is not one memory I can recall where my parents held me or even just asked me how I was doing. As a 30 year old woman now, sympathy is nauseating to me. It physically feels like my skin crawls whenever someone expresses sympathy towards me. Even last year, when I experienced a pregnancy loss. Are these two things related? JOINING MY CHANNEL MEMBERSHIPS https://www.youtube.com/@Katimorton/membership MERCHANDISE https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ MY BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? http://bit.ly/2s0mULy ONLINE THERAPY While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati PATREON https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE Instacart: https://www.instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Ask Kati Anything, licensed marriage and family therapist Kati Morton addresses why the healing process often feels more overwhelming after a breakthrough or a new diagnosis. We dive deep into the complexities of adult autism, the physical "freeze" response caused by trauma shame, and the frustration of feeling like your mental health journey has stalled. Kati also shares her perspective on the evolving role of GLP-1 medications in treating "food noise" and why reaching out for help when you’re "doing okay" is actually the best time for deep therapeutic work. Whether you’re navigating a difficult legal trigger like a parole hearing or searching for meaning in the face of depression, this episode provides grounded, empathetic tools to help you move forward. Shopping today's sponsor helps support Ask Kati Anything. ZocDoc - ⁠visit https://www.zocdoc.com/KATI⁠ to find and instantly book a doctor you love today! Key Topics Covered Autism & "Standard" Therapy: Why therapy can feel like a performance after an adult diagnosis and how to adapt your sessions. 
 The Silence of Shame: How to handle the dissociation and urge to "no-show" after disclosing childhood sexual abuse. 
 Coping Skill "Hard Stops": Recognizing when weed or restrictive eating shifts from a survival tool to a barrier in your recovery. 
 Social Cues & Connection: Practical advice for "reality testing" interactions and distinguishing between friendly and flirty behavior. 
 Maintenance vs. Crisis: Why you don't need to be "doing poorly" to benefit from therapy—and why maintenance work is more effective. 
 The Search for Meaning: Navigating depression when traditional treatments like CBT or DBT feel out of reach or ineffective. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton discusses what it means to have an underdeveloped sense of self, why we can stop crying when we are struggling with suicidal thoughts, and why certain diagnoses can can frequently co occur together. Kati also discusses TBI’s and other head injuries and the effects that can have on our mental health. She then talks about being a mental health professional and having our own issues, and why therapists leave room for silence in sessions. AUDIENCE QUESTIONS for Ask Kati Anything episode 195 I often see “an underdeveloped sense of self” on symptom lists for mental illnesses, but I’ve never really seen a comprehensive description of what a fully developed sense of self looks like. How do you recognize when someone’s sense of self is underdeveloped? I am struggling with constant suicidal ideation and when I talk about it to my therapist or psychiatrist, I don’t cry when I say the hard stuff and I’m afraid it is painting the narrative that I am lying about it. But the truth is that in the past whenever I would cry, I wouldn’t get help. Also with this being constant for over 2 years, my therapist is expressing that she is beginning to feel helpless which makes me feel so bad and like a burden. What are your thoughts? I was wondering if you could explain why certain diagnoses can commonly be coexisting. Like why is having an ED and ocd seen together often? I'm in the trenches right now with both and GAD, and they feed into each-other and are so tightly intertwined, that even the idea of sorting them out is exhausting. At this point it feels like the "what came first, the chicken or the egg?" question and I find myself just going through the cycle of trying to attach the behavior to the correct diagnosis... I suffered a head injury about 6 months ago and have struggled with feeling depressed adjusting to my new way of life (not ‘smart’ anymore, can’t work full time, not able to participate in hobbies etc). For context I had anxiety before the injury and was apparently struggling a lot with this (I can’t remember the last couple of years). I’m struggling feeling anxious about being ‘stuck’ like this forever. I’m UK based and am receiving basic CBT... Right now I'm in my internship of counseling. I feel like I'm a fake and a failure. I personally struggle with anxiety and what I believe is ptsd. But my therapist recently changed it so it's not ptsd. I struggle with my parents divorce and dealing with a lot of emotions and anger towards my dad. Currently all of my clients that I'm getting are all struggling with similar issues.. Hi Kati, I have a new therapist. Been seeing her for almost two months. During our session I talk about something and when I'm done she just sits there in silence looking at me. It drives me crazy... MY BOOKS ⁠Traumatized⁠ ⁠Are u ok?⁠ ⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠PATREON⁠ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE I⁠nstacart⁠⁠Amazon⁠ ⁠Kati's Merchandise⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week Licensed therapist Kati Morton discusses what to do when our medication numbs out our feelings. She also explains why therapists disclose certain information and when that’s inappropriate. Then she digs into the difference between rumination and over thinking, why we have to grieve something we never had, and why we can close our eyes in therapy. Finally, she talks about dating with a mental illness and why DBT can be so confusing. Questions for Ask Kati Anything episode 194: 1. I have been diagnosed with BPD, Bipolar II, CPTSD and anxiety. I recently stopped taking my mood stabilizer because it numbs my feelings. I just started EMDR with my therapist and she indicated that I should probably go back on the mood stabilizer because my feelings are so intense and out of control. My thinking is that if I numb my feelings then the EMDR won't work. 2. In my last therapy session my therapist told me she recently had a client commit suicide. She disclosed that info to say that she wasn't fully present so we were only going to be checking in before the holiday. That was ok, but I feel really really bad for her. That can't be easy. I felt like I should say something to her, but I didn't know what to say. From a therapist's perspective, is there anything I can do or say to her? 3. I am so thankful for your videos and how you break things down in a simplified form. I'm hoping you can do this for my question. Could you please explain the difference between RUMINATING VS OVER THINKING? I've been an over thinker as far back as I can remember. It's both a blessing and a curse! I can create detailed stories in my mind and play them out, much like others watching TV. Mostly, I find I over think on conflict as I will replay the scene on repeat. 4. How can I live with the grief that certain times in my life will never come back, especially when these are times of childhood which could have been joyful or lighthearted and instead were deeply affected by trauma? How do we heal wounds of "missing" something that we can never bring back because of the time that is gone? 5. Just wondering why I shut my eyes in therapy and whether you have witnessed this in therapy? I notice when therapy gets too much or hard I close my eyes and can't seem to stop myself doing this no matter how much I try. Am I just weird and how do I stop this? Any advice? Thanks Kati 6. I met my girlfriend on an ED ward. I'm out and doing well but she's still there and struggling. Do you think our relationship can work? I really love her. Xx7. I’ve been doing DBT in therapy and it’s getting confusing. How do I tell my therapist that I’m confused by it all and how do I know it’s working, can u please answer? MY BOOKS ⁠Traumatized⁠ ⁠Are u ok?⁠ ⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠PATREON⁠ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE I⁠nstacart⁠⁠Amazon⁠ ⁠Kati's Merchandise⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton discusses why we can overly attach to teachers, how to know if our burnout is turning into depression, and how to get through trauma processing without using unhealthy coping skills. Kati then explains why we can sometimes want to keep our eating disorders, why OCD squashes our insight, and how to sleep when struggling with PTSD. Ask Kati Anything- your mental health podcast, episode 193 1. I think I overly-attach to my teachers who also happen to be my research advisors. I really wish they could be my moms, I constantly seek their validation and approval. I want to make them feel proud of me. You get the idea. How can I become more aware of this? How can I stop trying to fill my parents' void by pushing other people into it? 2. How do I know if what I'm feeling is more related to burnout or is entering into the realm of depression? I am not necessarily sad all the time but am at a point where I am just down and don't really have any interest in doing things anymore because I feel I have no energy or motivation, which I know sounds a lot like depression... 3. I just started reprocessing trauma with my wonderful therapist. My problem is that with just one session of this, I have become unraveled. My emotions are so intense that I am wanting to cope in unhealthy ways such as cutting which I haven't done in a long time and having suicidal thought of which I have attempted before and am angry that I lived... 4. My question is what if I want to keep my eating disorder? What if the pros to keep it far more than the pros to lose it. It helps with my c-ptsd symptoms and even though I do not, not, not see it it keeps me small. Like being underweight gets me closer to being invisible, it helps me hide, I can hide in more places, and it’s comforting(??)... 5. My question is about OCD and insight. I have a diagnosis of OCD but sometimes I don’t actually think I have it at all. There are rooms in my house that I cannot use because they are contaminated and I can’t get them to be uncontaminated no matter how hard I try. The person that lived here before me was a heavy smoker and the place was coated in nicotine to the point that it was ingrained in all the woodwork and silicone round windows etc... 6. I can’t sleep. I don’t want to close my eyes. I have panic attacks if I am woken during the night. I can’t stop and relax at all and I find myself doom scrolling social media until I am absolutely exhausted. I know I shouldn’t be on my phone before going to sleep. When I was a little girl my bedroom was not safe. I don’t feel safe. I feel like I’m trying desperately to avoid having to stop. Keeping busy gives my mind something else to focus on. I’ve tried melatonin but that just makes me feel awful and like I’m hungover the next day. It doesn’t help sleep anyway. I’ve tried changing my room around to make it different and I have a night light so when I awake through the night I can quickly identify my surroundings. I feel so embarrassed that I have to have a night light in my 40s. Do you have any suggestions to help with sleep when it doesn’t feel safe? ------------------- MY BOOKS ⁠Traumatized⁠ ⁠Are u ok?⁠ ⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠PATREON⁠ SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE I⁠nstacart⁠⁠Amazon⁠ ⁠Kati's Merchandise⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Ask Kati Anything, Kati talks about why we can’t cry sometimes, and how on the day of therapy we can actually feel better and not share what’s really going on with us. Then she explains how therapists read the room, and how we can all deal with disappointment and frustration. Finally she discusses ways that we can support a friend who recently attempted to take their own life. Audience questions: 1. When I started therapy, I cried a lot in session because it was just so overwhelming to talk and think about my emotions and things I’ve been through. I had never talked to a therapist before so I would just cry out of overwhelm. I’ve been working with my therapist for almost 6 months now and I’m hitting a block where I can’t cry in session. We are talking about trauma from high school and I can run through the whole story without crying. Even my therapist cried. Why can’t I feel this emotion? Is it because it was so long ago? I feel weird not having an emotional response. 2. So I have an issue with therapy. All week I am on an emotional roller coaster. When therapy day comes, I wake up completely put together- like nothing is wrong and I am completely centered. As soon as I leave my appointment I get so upset for not sharing how I'm really doing. I have told my therapist about this, and he told me to write things down throughout the week as they come up and bring it with me. I wrote them down but can't seem to hand it over. I am processing a trauma, and I think I'm stuck due to extreme self-loathing and disgust. He said it's a defense mechanism, which to some extent is true. 3. I'm wondering if you could talk about how therapists "read the room" and "read minds"? How do you learn to analyze cues and signs the patient is presenting with and what if there are inconsistencies? 4. How can I deal with disappointment/ frustration and be more patient with myself? Every time a therapy session doesn’t go as I hoped and we don’t get to work on the trauma as we planned, for example because I dissociate or because we talk about something that came up during the week, after the session I’m always really desperate and hopeless and angry with myself, and also guilty because I feel like should be able to control my dissociation so it doesn’t get in the way so much. It just feels like wasting time and that scares me. My therapist always tells me that I shouldn’t put so much pressure on myself, and I’m sure she’s right, but I don’t know how. 5. My best friend is in hospital after a suicide attempt a few days ago. And I don’t know how to be around her now. My feelings jump around and change all the time. I am shocked, I’m sad that she was so desperate, I am scared to say something wrong that will push her over the edge and try again. I’m relieved that she is alive. I was so scared when she didn’t answer any calls, texts and her doorbell, after I saw the ambulance in front of her house. I’m angry with her, and I feel guilty for being angry. She planned it, and I felt that... MY BOOKS ⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist. Simply click ⁠HERE ⁠⁠⁠⁠PATREON⁠⁠⁠ community HELP SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE ⁠I⁠⁠nstacart⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Kati's Merchandise⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on Ask Kati Anything, I will discuss feeling like we will never recover and how to get through it. I will also talk about body checking and how often a therapist should call out a client about it. Then I will explain why we can struggle to have fun and relax in life, and why we can feel stuck in a younger version of ourselves. I will dive into what effects being a child of rape can have on us, and why we can feel angry when therapy is ending. 1. I suffer from anxiety, depression, and CPTSD, and if I'm honest with myself, I've never felt like I'm going to recover - I've always felt that one day the things I struggle with will win, and I'll end things. I've been struggling a lot lately to do anything that isn't immediately required... 2. I'm wondering about the frequency that a therapist should be calling a client out for body checking behavior during session? When are times you ignore it vs bring it up? I'm currently in ED recovery and we have sessions where there's absolutely nothing said, but other days that are rapid fire, one after the other callouts. I'm still very stuck in some of the behaviors and don't realize I'm doing them when I get anxious... 3. I feel like I don’t know how to have fun and just relax. I’m so anxious and scared all of the time and I feel like everyday if not multiple times a day I hear horrible stories about shootings, killings, disease, war, fires, car accidents and so much more and I’m constantly so scared and feel so sad for all the people affected. I feel guilty for having minor issues when such bigger things are going on and I also feel so on edge that at any minute something bad is going to happen... 4. I was wondering if you could talk a little bit about being a child born out of rape. I'm sure there are quite a few of us out there, but no one ever talks about the impact this has on our lives. I think I've known my entire life that I was the product of a rape but it didn't click with me until I was in my late 30s. The more I think about it, the more uneasy I feel. Half of my DNA is from a monster. I feel disgusted. I am adopted, abandoned at birth, so there is no one I can ask about my biological parents. Has there been any research done on children born from rape? 5. I hope you're well. I have a question, why do I still feel like a young girl even though I'm already 51... I don't understand it, it is so confusing. I have CPTSD, does that have anything to do with it? 6. My therapist left her practice and I'll start therapy with a new therapist soon but I don't know if I'll be able to trust her and I feel very lost. Is there anything I can do to be open towards her? Also I ended the last session with being very angry at my therapist. And I don't know what to do with that anger. I feel like she just abandoned me and doesn't care. I can't even think about her without getting angry anymore. Why does that happen and what can I do to process these feelings? Because it almost feels like I hate her now and before I always felt very close to her. MY BOOKS ⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠ ⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist. Simply click HERE ⁠⁠PATREON⁠⁠ community HELP SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE I⁠⁠nstacart⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Kati's Merchandise⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today I will talk about our urge to minimize our trauma symptoms and whether or not we can do that so much that we think we are fine. I will explain what causes us to be traumatized and why some people aren’t affected like we are. I will dive into the reasons we can feel like we are making up our mental illnesses, how to talk about sex with a therapist of the opposite sex, and ways we can cope with extreme anxiety and trauma. Finally, I will dive into ways to support our children with their anxiety without making our own worse. Ask Kati Anything- your mental health podcast, episode 192 1. Is it possible to minimize trauma symptoms (without realizing) so much that you actually believe you're fine until your therapist says that this looks like something that is still bothering you? I always assumed I'm fine... 2. I was wondering if you could talk a bit about what can tip the scales from a person experiencing trauma to being "traumatized". Can we ever cause ourselves to be traumatized by our reaction to the trauma? When I was 8... 3. I was wondering why I always feel like I'm making up my mental disorder? No matter how hard I try to convince myself, I always go back into the same thought. I constantly spend hours searching up why I would feel this way, and no matter how much reassurance I get, it never helps this thought go away. I always end up thinking, "what if I'm just lying to myself" or "what if I've just convinced myself to believe my own lie" ... 4. I am a female with a male therapist. We are starting to talk about sex. I've had a few issues come up as an adult when I have been with men and I sometimes question if he has done similar things to women or to what extent he has been disrespectful... 5. I was wondering how you can cope with extreme anxiety and trauma in a healthy way. I am still at school and at this point I physically can't go into lessons. I don't know why, it's just like my brain won't let me, even if I want to. I try my best to, but there's just this really daunting, exhausting, anxiety provoking feeling whenever I think about it... 6. Can you talk about ways I could help myself when I am trying to stay calm and present when dealing with my child's anxiety but her anxiety is only deeply triggering my anxiety? How do I work through this? I need to help her in the moment but I struggle to not get triggered myself. Thanks for all your wonderful advice! ----------------------------------------------------------------------- MY BOOKS ⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠ONLINE THERAPY⁠⁠⁠ While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist. Simply click ⁠HERE ⁠⁠⁠⁠PATREON⁠⁠⁠ community HELP SUPPORT THE CHANNEL BY SHOPPING HERE ⁠I⁠⁠nstacart⁠⁠⁠⁠Amazon⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Kati's Merchandise⁠⁠⁠ PARTNERSHIP Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com PLEASE READ If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today on Ask Kati Anything, I will be talking about being obsessed with our mental illness and diagnosis, and why we can find ourselves spending so much time researching them. I will also explain sleep's role in our mental health and what to do if we aren’t sleeping well. Then we will dig into exercise and how it can be used as a form of self injury and what we can do about it. We will then discuss dating someone with BPD and how we can be more supportive, ways that we can build safety for ourselves, and what we have to do in order to deserve therapy. I have been constantly thinking about my depression and eating disorder. I am always looking up articles about it, watching YouTube videos about it, and taking online self assessments. Why could I be obsessing so much? How do you cope with life when you don't get adequate sleep? I experienced bad sleep deprivation (from changing shifts originally from overnights to day shift) which made it hard to function ... What are your thoughts on exercise as a form of self injury? It has so many benefits for me, and I know a lot of folks struggling with anxiety, depression, ocd have used it as a “healthy” coping skill. When would it become a form of self injury rather than self care? I recently started dating someone with BPD and I was wondering if you had any tips on where to start learning about how to be supportive of them. Especially when it comes to splitting behavior. I don't just want to trust dr. Google. How can I build safety for myself? I've been doing better in all areas, but I never feel safe in my body. Is this normal for someone with extensive trauma history... I wanted to ask you if I even deserve to be able to go to therapy if I've never experienced any trauma. I've been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, but my therapist says that it's genetic. If that's true, then how is talk therapy going to... Merch https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ My Books (in stores now) Traumatized Are u ok? Online Therapy? While I do not currently offer online therapy, BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Shop my Favs Instacart Amazon: Partnerships Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please Read If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode we will be talking about why we can crave physical touch yet struggle to ask for it and even feel awkward when it’s happening. I will also talk about asking for things in therapy so that we get our needs met, and how we can forgive ourselves for past suicide attempts. I will then dig into therapy ending and why we can fear it, how people can actually love their life, and finally how to communicate about our mental illness. I hope my answers are helpful! Let’s jump right in! 1. I was wondering what your thoughts or tips are for people who crave physical touch but don’t get it or find it difficult or awkward to try and ask for it. 2. Is it ok to ask your therapist for more directed sessions? When I go into my appointment, she asks what I want to work on and I don’t really know what I want to do or where I want to go. 3. I was wondering what advice you would give for how to forgive yourself for a suicide attempt? I’m struggling years later when anyone offers compassion or tries to comfort me. 4. Is it normal to fear the end of therapy? I have only a certain number of sessions and still have a lot but nevertheless I already fear the end. Of course I hope it will be better by then but still the thought of never seeing my therapist again is very hard. 5. How can people love life? I'm not jealous or angry, it's just a "concept" I don't understand. For me life was/is always being scared, bullied, traumatized etc. 6. Hi Kati! I’m new to your channel but I’ve recently been having an issue with communicating my mental illness with my partner. She has asked me to be more open about my depression and anxiety, which I have been doing for the most part, but I am... Recap by Tammy AI⁠ ⁠0:03⁠: 💆 Craving physical touch is a normal and reasonable need, but it can be difficult to ask for it or feel awkward when receiving it.⁠ 4:25⁠: 💆 The video discusses how to heal from harmful touch and develop a healthy relationship with touch. ⁠8:06⁠: 💔 Physical touch is a human need, but some people may struggle with it due to various reasons, such as childhood neglect or abuse.⁠ 11:59⁠: 👥 The video discusses trauma processing and finding ways to soothe the nervous system in order to cope with triggers related to childhood sexual abuse and the need for physical touch.⁠ 15:52⁠: 🗣️ The therapist encourages being direct in therapy and asking for guidance, as it is the patient's time and process.⁠ 19:58⁠: 💡 Therapist discusses the importance of therapy, communication, and connection in dealing with suicidal thoughts and attempts.⁠ 23:32⁠: 😊 Katie discusses the importance of understanding why something is a big deal to us and suggests exploring therapy to address emotional neglect and inner child work.⁠ 27:22⁠: ✨ Therapy can help, but it's important to do the work outside of sessions as well.⁠ 31:07⁠: 😊 Focus on the good in life and choose to love it, despite the bad.⁠ 36:29⁠: 💬 The importance of consistent and repetitive communication when discussing mental illness with a partner, especially during medication transitions.⁠ 39:33⁠: ✨ The video discusses the importance of recognizing and expressing our own emotions and communicating effectively with our partners.⁠ New Merch: https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ My Books (in stores now) Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? http://bit.ly/2s0mULy Online Therapy: I do not currently offer online therapy. My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Shop my Favs: Instacart: instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton Partnerships: Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please Read If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room.more Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we will talk about breaking a therapist’s trust and what to do, why we can always feel like a bad person, the signs of past sexual abuse, why we can get stuck in negative thoughts cycles and blaming ourselves for every misstep, and whether comfort is a need or a want. Let’s get into those questions! 1/ II broke my therapist’s trust and she expressed that she felt angry with me. I totally agree that I crossed a line but for the rest of the session I don’t feel like she treated me very kindly. I felt pushed to... 2/ I hope you are doing well. I wanted to ask you why I always feel like such a bad person. I feel like there is something wrong with me, and that's why everyday I try to be nicer and nicer so that no one thinks I'm mean. 3/ I have several signs of having been sexually abused as a little girl. I don't have any memory of it and no suspicions as to who may have done it nor when it happened. I don't have body memories, I don't have flashbacks, and I don't have... 4/ I am often reminded of minor mistakes I have made in my life throughout the day. These personal small blunders from my past enter my stream of consciousness like... 5/ I am wondering about comfort: is it a need or a want? I know children need comfort, but I’m a 40-year-old adult! Meds plus 2.5 years of therapy have helped me get a little better at handling my feelings, but honestly, I still suck. I still crave comfort when my emotions get so overwhelming, which is often, but I don’t trust anyone…except my therapist. New Merch: https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/ My Books (in stores now) Traumatized https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok? http://bit.ly/2s0mULy Online Therapy: I do not currently offer online therapy. My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon: https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Shop my Favs: Instacart: instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton Partnerships: Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please Read If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room.more Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of Ask Kati Anything, Kati is joined by comedian and actor Jiaoying Summers. Jiaoying, originally from China, lives in LA and is a fast rising star on the comedy scene. Her personal story of surviving China's one child policy and coming to America, going to University in Kentucky & moving to LA to pursue her dreams is an inspiring one - Don’t miss out! Jiaoying’s Podcast TIGERMILF: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLIbSb5u2cvhmDjJdXM72w9cw_tfC4qyQC&si=Mj4EeBe0Cx7nedta For all things Jiaoying, visit: https://www.jiaoyingsummers.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

She caught herself mid-sentence and realized it wasn't her voice. It was her mother's. This episode is about the patterns you inherited without knowing it, the ones running your parenting, your relationships, and the way you talk to yourself right now.Kati sits down with JoAnn Crohn, parenting educator and founder of No Guilt Mom, for a conversation that starts with mom guilt and lands somewhere much deeper. JoAnn shares how she white-knuckled through breastfeeding because she believed that's what a good mom does, and the single sentence from a therapist that broke the pattern. Kati talks about spending a month with her own mother and watching in real time as her self-talk mirrored thoughts her mom carried decades earlier. Together they trace how the martyrhood pattern gets passed down, why so many women lose themselves in motherhood without noticing, and what it actually takes to come back.They also cover why families that never fought produce adults who think conflict means the relationship is over, what happens when your kid leaves for college and you realize your identity went with them, the journaling practice that rewired JoAnn's thought spirals, why naming your inner critic actually helps you stop believing it, and how JoAnn found herself again through improv comedy at 44. This is the conversation for anyone who has ever heard themselves say something and thought: that wasn't me. That was my mom. Shopping with our sponsors helps support Ask Kati Anything. Please check out this week's special offers: For a limited time our listeners are getting 20% off their entire order by using code KATI at https://cheershealth.com/ Visit http://Care.com and use code KATI for 20% off your initial subscription or a Senior Care Advisor plan Go to https://www.zocdoc.com/KATI to find and instantly book a doctor you love today Ask Kati Anything ep. 311 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT with guest: JoAnn Crone Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we're be talking about how to go deeper in therapy to explore what it means to be you. We will also discuss why we can often feel like we are exaggerating what we tell our therapist, or think we are making up what we have gone through. We will dig into childhood sexual abuse and why it can be comforting, why hearing about it can sometimes be arousing, and all of the things that can come along with that sort of trauma. I will explain the difference between disordered eating and an eating disorder, and when we should reach out for help. We will come up with ways to uphold boundaries with people who don’t respect them, and the effects a near death experience can have on us. Let’s get into those questions! Audience questions for episode 185 of Ask Kati Anything, your mental health podcast. 1. I’m in therapy for anxiety, self esteem and trauma. We talk about surface things like what happened that week and checking in with symptoms, and other times we... 2. I wanted to ask you why I always feel like I'm over-exaggerating what I tell my therapist. I don't do this on purpose, but after my sessions, I always get really angry at myself because I... 3. Is it normal to fantasize about your childhood sexual abuse to try to find comfort in it? I feel like I’m trying to change the narrative to make it feel less traumatic. 4. Hi kati 😊 what's the difference between disordered eating and an eating disorder and when is it serious enough to ask for help? I've been having some problems with restricting and purging when I do eat more than once a day, but I don't feel like it's bad enough because... 5. How can you set boundaries for people who cross boundaries all the time? Especially if it’s a parent you are struggling with. Luckily I don’t live at home anymore but quitting the relationship/contact completely isn’t an option. I don’t want that. Another question is, how can you not let negativity ruin your mood.6. I have asked this question a number of times and so I really hope this gets picked. I was wondering if anyone has ever told you they had an NDE (near-death experience). If they have, how did you react? What did you say? ***NEW MERCH*** ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Books (in stores now) ⁠⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠⁠ https://geni.us/Bfak0j ⁠⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠⁠ http://bit.ly/2s0mULy Online Therapy - I do not currently offer online therapy. My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠⁠ PATREON ⁠⁠⁠https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/⁠⁠⁠Consider shopping with our affiliates, all commissions earned help us create new episodes Instacart ⁠⁠⁠⁠instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB⁠⁠⁠⁠ Amazon ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton⁠⁠⁠⁠ Partnerships Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please Read - If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this week’s episode we will be talking about coming back from a mental health sabbatical and how to ensure we do it properly without relapsing. We also talk about the relationship between eating disorders and control. Then we dig into the difference between ADHD, Autism, and CPTSD specifically in females, and also how those in the medical and mental health field can deal with triggering situations or patients. We also discuss why we can struggle so much with self compassion and why some of us prefer to switch languages when talking about our struggles. Questions for episode 184 of the Ask Kati Anything podcast 1. Do you have any advice for people getting back into the workforce after a mental health sabbatical? I lost my job as a medical technician late last year due to alcoholism and compassion fatigue. 2. Can you possibly talk about the relationship between eating disorders and control? I guess I’m asking this in regard to the general sentiment that eating disorders are us “controlling what we can.” 3. Kati, can you talk about the difference between ADHD, Autism, and CPTSD in how they might present, specifically in females? 4. I work in the mental health field and action all the incoming referrals however often find them very triggering. I have (stable) bipolar and have self harmed for a long time, anything that mentions self harm really triggers my urges. I feel like such a fraud working in mental health... 5. Can we talk about issues with self compassion…I am currently in a PHP program and have been working on self compassion but I am struggling so much. I cannot help it but so totally hate myself. 6. Is it unhealthy to switch languages in my head to cope? I am not sure that my question is relatable or makes any sense but I do the switch quite often and would love to know your stance. ***NEW MERCH*** ⁠⁠⁠https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠My Books (in stores now) ⁠⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠⁠ https://geni.us/Bfak0j ⁠⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠⁠ http://bit.ly/2s0mULy Online Therapy - I do not currently offer online therapy. My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠⁠ PATREON ⁠⁠https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/⁠⁠Consider shopping with our affiliates, all commissions earned help us create new episodes Instacart ⁠⁠⁠instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB⁠⁠⁠ Amazon ⁠⁠⁠https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton⁠⁠⁠ Partnerships Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please Read - If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton dives into negative thought loops and ruminating thoughts. She explains why we can get caught up in them and what we can do to pull ourselves out. She also discusses whether or not we have to dive into the reasons behind our mental health issues to heal, and how to get to a place where we can talk about our past trauma with our therapist. She dives into the ways she knows a patient is dissociating, and how we can have healthy relationships with people who have a mental illness. This and so much more in this week’s episode! Questions for episode 183 of the Ask Kati Anything podcast 1. What makes someone a “complex” case in therapy? Is it a specific diagnosis or cluster of diagnoses? Or is it dependent on how the client presents? 2. My question is about ruminating thoughts and negative thought loops. I constantly find myself in this thought loop in which I’m convinced that I’m lying about my problems to my therapist. I have to then tell myself the facts and use evidence to... 3.Can true long lasting progress be made without talking about the underlying problems that lead to my depression and anxiety? I have been in therapy for a few months now and each week all we discuss which skills or... 4. Do you have any tips for sharing traumatic memories or details (like childhood sexual abuse) with your therapist for the first time? 5. How can you tell if a client is dissociated in session? Like can you see that? And what do you think of the term high functioning anxiety? Can someone with this also dissociate? 6. How do I know whether the way I feel classifies as "depressed" and "anxious" or whether this is just what life feels like for everyone? Maybe living life is just hard, exhausting, and having to fight to get through your days is normal? 7. What's the difference between having social difficulties because of social anxiety and having social difficulties because of ASD and how would I differentiate between just needing to expose myself to social situations and pushing through the anxiety... 8. I wanted to know about how to leave my therapist without her bursting into tears. She has been under a lot of stress lately and has been canceling my appointments. I really need to... 9. How do you maintain friendships with people with mental illness, without it turning into a helping relationship? I have ended friendships simply because it was taking a toll on my mental health as I get texts and calls on... ***NEW MERCH*** ⁠⁠https://spreadshop-admin.spreadshirt.com/katimorton/⁠ ⁠⁠⁠My Books (in stores now) ⁠⁠Traumatized⁠⁠ https://geni.us/Bfak0j ⁠⁠Are u ok?⁠⁠ http://bit.ly/2s0mULy Online Therapy - I do not currently offer online therapy. My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online therapist, please visit: ⁠⁠https://betterhelp.com/kati⁠ PATREON ⁠https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/⁠ Consider shopping with our affiliates, all commissions earned help us create new episodes Instacart ⁠⁠instacart.oloiyb.net/y2j2GB⁠⁠ Amazon ⁠⁠https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton⁠⁠ Partnerships Linnea Toney linnea@underscoretalent.com Please Read - If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices