Explore every episode of the podcast Ask Elisa: Dating and Relationship Stories + Advice

This is the first of the Dating 101 episodes! The most common question I get from listeners and social media followers is how to start dating. Many people become single after a long term relationship and have never dated before. So this episode is a guide to help you take those first steps to start dating again. There will be more Dating 101 episodes going into detail of first dates, communication, dating anxiety, and more.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

This is a SPICY episode! I talk with Chrys about her experience in an open relationship, practicing ethical non-monogamy, dating, divorce, the kink community, and more. I had so much fun talking with Chrys!

The listener question that Chrys and I tackle is "In the early stages of dating, how do you know when to call it? So often, the other person is great and nothing is wrong with them and I just don't know if I should keep giving them a chance or just say I'm not feeling it."

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

NOTE FROM ELISA: This episode feels way more personal than the ones I’ve put out so far. It’s scary sharing this much of me for public consumption. In this episode, Jake teases me a lot and some people may think he's not very nice to me. The episode is a tiny snippet of an interaction between two complex humans who like each other very much. A lot of the sarcasm is linked to our own inside jokes. In the larger context of the relationship, his kindness and care for me greatly outweigh the teasing. And he could stand to work on not reacting to everything with sarcasm. We all have things to work on. I literally sat him down and recorded him reacting to me telling him about my dating history - quite the uncomfortable situation for both of us. But here it is, in an editing form for you to listen to. 

What is the purpose of sharing personal stuff? My purpose is to share authentic stories for people to relate to and learn from. I have to remind myself that being open and vulnerable is something the world needs more of. I can do this.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Hilary is back to tell two queer dating horror stories. Did you know that women can lie about things too? And I share a story about a dude I matched with on a dating app who was a little too eager and uninhibited.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

On this episode of Ask Elisa, (Boy) Kelly recounts their very first match on eHarmony — a weeks-long chat that escalated from sweet to intense, with premature demands, you can't say "cool beans," sexting, a two-hour meltdown, and ultimately an unmatch and deleted profile.

Afterward, Elisa reads a collection of cringe-worthy dating app profiles and messages from Bumble, highlighting red flags, awkward bios, and the strange humor of online dating while inviting listeners to submit their own screenshots.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Ask Elisa celebrates Pride Month with the first LGBTQIA+ guest! Hilary shares her story of dating women and men. I had so much fun talking with Hilary and I learned quite a bit. 

As always, I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is, “What do you think about having a friends with benefits relationship?”

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

In this episode, I finally have a male guest! I talk with Kelly (who I call Boy Kelly, because one of my best friends is named Kellee and she gets to be Kellee. Hi Kellee, I love you.) Boy Kelly shares his experience as a straight man on the dating apps. I give him my permission to trash women on my show, because I know Boy Kelly would never.

As always, I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is, “I’m ready to start dating again but I’m scared of rejection. And I’m scared people will be mean to me. What are some tips to work through this?”

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

I apologize for the abrupt ending on this episode. We're new at this; mistakes happen. In this episode, I talk with Morgan. For the past three years, Morgan has chosen not to date. We talk about what it's like to be a single woman in a society that places so much value on romantic partnerships.

As always, I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is, "Should people wait until a divorce is final before they start to date?"

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

In this episode, Claudia is back to share her craziest dating story. She starts off by saying, "This story... I do think should be a Netflix show..." And I share a quick story about the audacity and self-importance of a random dude I matched with on Bumble.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

In this episode, I talk with Dani. Dani became a single mom in her mid-20s and over the past decade and half has stepped in and out of the dating scene. Dani shares her experience dating as a single mom, through college, grad school, working full time, and being an overall impressive human. 

As always, I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is, "I'm finally ready to start dating again. But my kids don't want me to. Do you have any suggestions for how to navigate this?"

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Bonus mini episode!

If you liked hearing me talk with Rhonda, my boyfriend's mom, in episode 5, you will love this short clip of us chatting away before we started the episode. 

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

An hour after meeting my (relatively new) boyfriend's mom, I'm sitting down and recording a podcast episode with her. Rhonda, now 66, tells the story of the worst blind date she's every been on. This episode confirms, that dating was rough before the apps. It's always been terrible, so let's just laugh about it.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Do you have a dating story you’d like to have featured on a Dating Storytime episode of Ask Elisa? Send in a written version of your favorite dating story for me to read on the show to askelisapodcast@gmail.com.

I also take questions from listeners. This can be a simple question about dating etiquette or sharing a dating dilemma you’re facing you’d like some feedback on. Send in your questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com.

New episodes every Thursday.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

In this episode, Claudia is back to talk with me about the chatting phase on the dating apps.  After you match with someone, you can chat. The chatting phase is the time to decide whether or not you want to meet in person. Since Claudia and I both date men, we only discuss chatting with men on dating apps. 

As always, I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is, "Have you ever been stood up before?"

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

It's a special dating storytime episode! These are short episodes where a guest and I each tell a story from our dating past. Please enjoy a quick story from Rachael about a guy with a boat and my story about a guy without a bedframe.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

In this episode, I talk with Claudia, a therapist and active dater. We discuss our processes for reviewing dating profiles, what gives us the immediate ick, and what we like to see. Since Claudia and I both date men, we only discuss men's dating profiles. 

As always, I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is, "Should unmatching etiquette be a thing?"

Send in your dating dilemmas and questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Find Ask Elisa online:

• www.askelisapodcast.com 
• Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/AskElisa
• Instagram: @askelisapodcast
• Threads: @askelisapodcast
• YouTube: @askelisa
• Tiktok: @askelisapodcast

About Ask Elisa

Ask Elisa is a podcast about dating in your late 30s, 40s, and older. I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me, I wanna talk about it! Dating at this stage in life has its unique challenges.

Join me and my guests as we take real questions from listeners and dive into the messy, funny, and often frustrating world of modern dating—from first dates and dating apps to boundaries, heartbreak, and everything in between. Whether you’re newly single, getting back out there after years, or just trying to make sense of it all, you’ll find validation, perspective, and comfort here. Come for the laughs, stay for the honesty—and leave feeling a little less alone in your love life.

In this episode, I talk with my friend Rachael about starting to date after a big break up. Many people in their late 30s, 40s, and older find themselves on the dating scene after the end of a significant relationship. I've been through a divorce and had a second long-term relationship of almost eight years end unexpectedly. Rachael called off her wedding just two weeks before the date. We discuss our experiences of the public nature of these types of break ups and what it was like to get back out on the dating scene.

I share a question from a listener for my guest and me to respond to. The question for this episode is "How do you balance small talk and depth on a first date?"

Rachael's blog: thisvulnerablelife.org

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.

Send in your dating dilemmas & questions to askelisapodcast@gmail.com or through social media direct messages to have Elisa and a guest share their response on a future episode.

Want to be a guest on Ask Elisa? Complete the Guest Interest Form

Find Ask Elisa online @askelisapodcast

www.askelisapodcast.com 

Ask Elisa is a feminist podcast about dating and relationships. Find humor and connection in discussions that challenge outdated gender roles, traditional narratives, and patriarchal expectations. Episodes include dating stories, dilemmas, and questions sent in from listeners. Join Ask Elisa for the laughs, stay for the honesty, and leave feeling a little less alone.

I’m your host, Elisa Sparkman. I found myself unexpectedly single right before my 40th birthday. Now with two years of dating behind me (plus a divorce and handful of break ups), I wanna talk about it! Join me for honest conversations about modern dating, divorce, dating apps, gender dynamics, situationships, red flags, boundaries, and building healthier relationships.