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Explore every episode of the podcast Adoptees On

Dive into the complete episode list for Adoptees On. Each episode is cataloged with detailed descriptions, making it easy to find and explore specific topics. Keep track of all episodes from your favorite podcast and never miss a moment of insightful content.

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TitlePub. DateDuration
Sasha Hom07 Nov 202501:02:27

311 | Sasha Hom

Sasha Hom lives an extraordinarily unconventional life. I'm so excited to introduce her to you. She's a writer, goat farmer, mother, and her new book Sidework is incredible. Today we talk about her experiences as a Korean adoptee, adopted to a Chinese American couple in California. Sasha tells us about her trips to Korea and China, we talk motherhood as adoptees, and how important writing is in her life.

 

Full Show Notes and Transcript Here

 

Join our adoptee community on Patreon here

 

Check out our upcoming live events here!

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Mirella Stoyanova24 Oct 202500:54:28

310 | Mirella Stoyanova

Mirella Stoyanova is our guest today, and I don't normally say this, but this was one of my favourite conversations in recent memory. Mirella is a therapist and writer, and her insights dazzled me. We talk about her experience being adopted at age 5, and what coming to America from Bulgaria was like. We discussed the what-ifs of kinship adoption, living in the both/and of grief and gratitude, and she shares an insight that stops me in my tracks: do adoptees reflect an existential crisis back to society?

 

Full Show Notes and Transcript Here

 

Join our adoptee community on Patreon here

 

Check out our upcoming live events here!

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

[Healing Series] Wounds of Childhood with Anna Linde, Sexologist04 Apr 202500:50:28

301 | [Healing Series] Wounds of Childhood with Anna Linde, Sexologist

This is a special episode in our Healing Series where we bring on adoptee experts to tackle issues that may impact our mental health. Most often we're talking with therapists but today I invited Anna Linde, a sexologist, to talk with us about the impacts of childhood sexual abuse on adopted people. This issue is so prevalent in our community and yet hardly anyone ever talks about it. We've talked about so many difficult things on the show that I think we're finally ready. So although we do keep this to a high level discussion, please take care when deciding if this a safe episode for you to listen to.

 

Full Show Notes and Transcript Here

 

Join our adoptee community on Patreon here

 

Check out our upcoming live events here!

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Mary Anna King01 Apr 202201:00:29

212 | Mary Anna King

Today the author of our April Adoptees On(ly) book club pick, B______s is with us! Mary Anna King was one of our very first podcast guests almost six years ago on season one. We discuss the challenges of being a kinship adoptee, the things that are often overlooked (like estrangements and other conflicts) that can force children to be unfairly used as weapons. We also talk about what it feels like to be a generational trauma cycle-breakers as Mary is expecting her first child.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Sullivan Summer25 Mar 202201:08:58

211 | Sullivan Summer

Today's guest is the brilliant Sullivan Summer! Growing up as a black transracial adoptee with white adoptive parents, Sullivan was actively discouraged from identifying as black by her adoptive mother. She shares about her recent decision to change her full name as a sign of identity reclamation and we also discuss the intersection of adoption, race, and the United States' history of slavery.

Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Recommended Resources
  1. What society gets wrong about transracial adoption: Sun Yung Shin, Shannon Gibney, and JaeRan Kim.
  2. Korean and Vietnamese adoptees on the intimate racialized politics of transracial adoption: Jane Jeong Trenka, Indigo Willing, and kimura byol-nathalie lemoine.
  3. Outsiders Within: Korean adoptees Jane Jeong Trenka and Ami Nafzger share their stories.
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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Stephanie Drenka18 Mar 202200:56:54

210 | Stephanie Drenka

Today's guest is the incredible Stephanie Drenka, and we say incredible because she saw the need for an online platform for underrepresented communities and went ahead and built VISIBLE magazine in one night. Stephanie talks about her shifting view of adoption over time, how being raised in a predominantly white community caused her to experience internalized racism, and why sometimes when you see a need in the community, you've got to be the one to go ahead and fill the gap.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Dr. Hollee McGinnis11 Mar 202201:04:23

209 | Dr. Hollee McGinnis

The indomitable Dr. Hollee McGinnis is on the podcast today! Many of you have definitely heard of Hollee and her immense contributions to the adoptee community both academically as a scholar and as a community builder which includes starting the adoptee-centric organization, Also Known As, over 25 years ago. Today we get to talk about some deeply personal topics to Hollee, which of course includes community building, but we also discuss how Hollee's perspective on adoption has changed over the years. Hollee shares how sometimes, who we see as the "high-performing adoptees" may be trying to outwork some internal struggles. Make sure you stick around until the end of the show as Hollee shares a poem she wrote about kimchi and how her breast cancer diagnosis lead her to a rediscovery of Korean food, this time as a cook!

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

208 Iana04 Mar 202200:57:06

Guest host Lisette Austin interviews her close lifelong friend Iana, who helped Lisette find her birth father using genetic genealogy. Iana shares her adoption and reunion story, and what led her to "come out of the fog" and begin exploring adoptee issues. She also shares what led her to become interested in genealogy, the importance of having a close adoptee friend, and what her top adoptee resources are. Together Lisette and Iana share some of the story behind their detective hunt, including a few of their favourite highlights.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

207 Lisette Austin25 Feb 202201:02:00

Today we're talking with Lisette Austin, who is going to have a very special role here at Adoptees On, but we won't spoil exactly what that is, yet. Lisette is an award-winning podcaster, passionate about travel, and also happens to be one of Haley's good friends. We discuss what it's meant for Lisette to learn more about her biological family using DNA testing and genealogical research and we share why this particular episode is a milestone marker in the life of the Adoptees On podcast.

Please join us in welcoming Lisette Austin to Adoptees On, in her new role as … well, you'll hear very soon!

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

206 Mike Trupiano18 Feb 202200:59:38

Today we are honoured to introduce you to Mike Trupiano. Mike shares about his painful childhood, marred by violence and a feeling of being fully unwanted.  We talk about adoptee healing, about searching for his biological family, which included a literal doorstop visit where he dressed up as a delivery driver. He's a skilled storyteller, actor and comedian, also a sober coach. Now living in Germany, Mike's worked so hard at self-care and reclaiming identity, we think you'll join us in being in awe of the skills he's built up. 

Full Show Notes Here   Recommended Resources Connect With Us

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

205 Melissa Guida-Richards11 Feb 202200:50:07

Today we are joined by Melissa Guida-Richards, author of What White Parents Should Know about Transracial Adoption: An Adoptee's Perspective on Its History, Nuances, and Practices. Melissa is a late discovery adoptee, accidentally finding out at age 19 that she was adopted. She shares with us how she's since reconciled with her adoptive mother and how they now navigate open conversations about race and adoption. Melissa also tells us about how and why she decided to educate and engage with adoptive parents both in print through her words, and in online discussions.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

204 Jan Beatty04 Feb 202200:57:27

Today I'm talking with Jan Beatty, poet, professor, and the author of the recently released memoir, American Bastard. We talk about how Jan wants to disrupt the traditional narrative, what she calls the "whitewashed" view of adoption. What happens when you publicly name your hockey-famous biological father, even after he denies your paternity claim? We even get to hear a reading from American Bastard, and it is so powerful it certainly made me tear up.

Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • American Bastard by Jan Beatty
  • The Body Wars by Jan Beatty (and other books of poetry)
  • Journey of the Adopted Self by B.J. Lifton
  • The West Pole by Diane Glancy
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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

203 Lisa Olivera, MFT28 Jan 202200:57:49

I'm honoured to introduce you to Lisa Olivera today, one of my favourite therapists to follow on Instagram. Her gentle and compassionate presence feels like just what we need in this time. The title of Lisa's new book, Already Enough: A Path to Self Acceptance, is the perfect description of the message she wants to share with us today: we're already enough.

Full Show Notes Here

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • Already Enough: A Path to Self Acceptance by Lisa Olivera, MFT
  • Make sure to follow Lisa's encouraging Instagram account
  • No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model by Richard C. Schwartz, PHD
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Haley's Sisters21 Mar 202500:54:38

300 | Haley's Sisters

We've reached our 300th episode! I found my paternal side of my family 14 years ago, and I discovered that I had three younger siblings. So even though I'm the only adoptee on today's show, I thought you'd enjoy this peek behind the curtain, exploring what was it like for my young sisters when they were told at age 9 and 12, that they had a surprise older sister.

 

Full Show Notes and Transcript Here

 

Join our adoptee community on Patreon here

 

Check out our upcoming live events here!

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

202 Leah Cooper21 Jan 202200:51:48

Today Leah Cooper shares how listening to hours and hours and hours of adoptees, birth families, and adoptive parents sharing their stories lead her to what she calls her "volcano of grief". Leah was a part of a team that created a play called In My Heart: The Adoption Play Project, which has been transformed into a graphic novel. We discuss how the impact of unpacking her adoption experience has been transformational.

Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • In My Heart: The Adoption Story Project - Created by Alan Berks & Leah Cooper, Illustrated by Becca Hart
  • The somatic approach - using meditation, yoga, & ASMR
  • The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

201 Haley Radke14 Jan 202200:19:57

Free preview Patreon episode with all the details of our 2022 Book Club: Adoptees On(ly) Book Club 2022 Announcements

Check out our Adoptees On(ly) Book Club picks to add to your TBR pile: https://www.adopteeson.com/bookclub

Join our private community: https://www.adopteeson.com/community

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

200 [Healing Series] Celebrations10 Dec 202100:56:47

Today we are talking about celebrations with Pam Cordano, MFT because we are celebrating 200 episodes of the Adoptees On Podcast! Pam and Haley talk about how celebrations can often feel scary for us as adopted people because feeling joy or happiness can be disorienting (upper limit problem anyone?). Pam shares a few different reasons why we may feel that way, teaches us steps towards feeling happiness, and how to hold space for both good things and challenging things simultaneously.

Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • 10 Foundations for a Meaningful Life (No Matter What's Happened) by Pam Cordano, MFT
  • Read more about the "Upper Limit Problem" in The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks
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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

199 Brian Stanton03 Dec 202100:59:20

Today we welcome back to Adoptees On, Brian Stanton. Brian shares with us how the pandemic morphed his script for a play into his fantastic new film @GhostKingdom. We talk about how relationships can shift for us as adopted people: building relationships with people we may believe are genetic relatives until it's confirmed they aren't, and how his conception story that Brian and his mother believed for decades got upended.

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

198 Andrea Ross26 Nov 202100:50:07

I'm thrilled to bring you today's guest, Andrea Ross, author of Unnatural Selection: A Memoir of Adoption and Wilderness. Andrea shares how a health crisis lead her outdoors, and how a decade of spending time in the wilderness brought her a feeling of groundedness. We discuss the loneliness that adopted people can face and how we've both seen this theme of reconnecting with ancestral landscapes popping up more and more frequently.

Full Show Notes Here

Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • Unnatural Selection: A Memoir of Adoption and Wilderness by Andrea Ross
  • The Wisdom of Wilderness: Experiencing the Healing Power of Nature by Gerald G. May
  • Adoption: The Making of Me podcast - Andrea's episode

Notes for Colorado adoptees from a fellow adoptee, Anne:

The Colorado Department of Human Services can give you your adoption file "If your adoption was handled by the state or a county, or the licensed child placement agency (LPCA) that handled your adoption has closed." I was able to receive this information even though I was not physically in Colorado. I just had to send a picture of my ID via email to confirm who I was. This service was free of charge.

Colorado adoptees who want to get their OBC and Report of an Adoption (which is basically like an integrated birth certificate and lists your names pre- and post-adoption, your adoptive parents, your birth parents, the date, time and place of your birth, and the attorney who filed the court documents for the adoption), need to contact the Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment or go to their website. There is a form to fill out and a fee to pay for this service.

One piece of information regarding sealed adoption information in Colorado is that circa 1990 all of the paper files were collected from the county courthouses to be microfiched and held centrally. So be prepared to receive copies of microfiche film that is potentially difficult to decipher.

More info and links available here from Adoption Search Resource Connection (based in Colorado): www.asrconline.org/get-records

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

197 Donna and Sara19 Nov 202101:04:11

Today we're back in the spirituality series and we are taking a look at cults and high-demand groups. My guests have both been impacted by cults and they have a theory that adopted people may be more susceptible to these types of groups. Donna and Sara have extensively researched cults since they got out and have a ton of knowledge to share with us. They both tell their personal stories of how they inadvertently found themselves in high-demand groups, how they got out, and what adopted people specifically need to know about cults.

Full Show Notes Here

Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • Sara Easterly's previous appearance on Adoptees On E143 and Donna's E79
  • A Little Bit Culty Podcast
  • The Vow: NXIVM Documentary on HBO
  • Searching for Mom: A Memoir by Sara Easterly
  • Terror, Love and Brainwashing: Attachment in Cults and Totalitarian Systems, by Alexandra Stein

More reading, research, and resources on the topic:

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

196 Jack Dermody12 Nov 202100:41:35

Today we welcome Jack Dermody to the podcast. We talk about family secrets in adoption and the impact it has on all the parties when they are revealed. Jack also gets personal and tells us what happens when you start closely examining your adoptee experience in your seventies. We talk about family preservation and adoptee support, and how that looks like community showing up for each other on a large scale.

Full Show Notes Here

Show Notes Recommended Resources Connect With Us

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195 [Estrangement Series] Ellianna Javed05 Nov 202100:59:44

We are revisiting the topic of estrangement today. Earlier in 2021 we did several episodes that examined estrangement and what made some of us decide to break contact with our adoptive families. When I was producing that series I always wanted to have an episode where we could talk about what it would look like to go BACK to our adoptive family after a period of estrangement. Can you ever go back once you've left?

Today Ellianna shares her experiences of reunion with her birth mother, and what lead to a decade-long estrangement from her adoptive family. She talks us through her decision-making process for reunification, and I was amazed to hear the depth of how she's looked back on this and processed all the things that have gone on in her life so far.

Full Show Notes Here

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194 Adoptee Remembrance Day29 Oct 202100:24:09

Adoptee Remembrance Day is commemorated annually on October 30th. This episode has a collection of recordings that listeners have submitted to the show on what Adoptee Remembrance Day means to them. Haley also shares a way you can show up for fellow adoptees during November, using #DearAdoptees.

Full Show Notes Here

  Recommended Resources

Crisis Hotlines:

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193 Mar22 Oct 202100:49:52

Do we have to choose between our biological family and our adoptive family? What about choosing between their religions or spiritual practices? Mar shares how they are both Jewish and Catholic. We talk through how they chose adult conversion to Judaism as a way to feel permanently grafted to their adoptive family. Mar is also very open about how recovery programs have helped them to identify as spiritual but not religious.

Full Show Notes Here

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Dr. Abby Hasberry07 Mar 202500:50:41

299 | Dr. Abby Hasberry

I'm so excited to welcome Dr. Abby Hasberry back to the show today! We are celebrating her brand new book, Adopting Privilege: A Memoir of Reinventing My Adoptee Narrative. Abby is a therapist, a scholar, an adoptee and a birth mother. We get into all of it: coercion in adoption, parenting after placing a child for adoption, reunion from both sides, we even talk about sororities! Abby also addresses why so many adoptees go on to place a child for adoption themselves.

 

Full Show Notes Here

 

Join our adoptee community on Patreon here

 

Check out our upcoming live events here!

This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

192 Susan Devan Harness15 Oct 202100:44:50

Our guest today is scholar and author Susan Devan Harness. Susan shares from an anthropological perspective about the policies in place behind the Indian Adoption Project and why Indigenous placement with white families was preferred by the government. She also shares some of the current action in the US courts to undermine and remove the Indian Child Welfare Act and why it is so critical for us to pay attention to the cascading effects this could have. We do get personal too, about what happened for Susan in her forties as she unravelled what being adopted really meant: being separated both from her original family and from her original culture.

Full Show Notes Here

Show Notes Recommended Resources

For Further Education:

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191 Dr. Erin Heim08 Oct 202100:56:42

Today's guest is Dr. Erin Heim who has spent a decade of her life researching and examining both the biblical texts in the New Testament that mention adoption as well as multiple books written from an evangelical perspective of adoption promotion. Erin teaches us what adoption looked like during the first century, and spoiler alert - it's nothing like modern-day adoption. Erin and I also put a critical lens to how adoptees are treated in the church today, and how conflating biblical metaphors of adoption and modern-day adoption is harmful and keeping churches from embracing a family preservation stance.

Full Show Notes Here

Recommended Resources
  • Adoption in Galatians and Romans: Contemporary Metaphor Theories and the Pauline Huiothesia Metaphors by Dr. Erin M. Heim
  • Dr. Erin M. Heim's chapter "The Inward Groaning of Adoption (Rom 8:12-25): Recovering the Pauline Adoption Metaphor for Mothers in the Adoption Triad (You can find that within the book Making Sense of Motherhood: Biblical and Theological Perspectives ed. by Beth Stovell)
  • Growing God's Family: The Global Orphan Care Movement and the Limits of Evangelical Activism Book by Samuel L. Perry
  • On Script episode interview with Erin Heim: Adoption in Galatians and Romans
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190 Barbara Sumner01 Oct 202100:54:16

I am thrilled to bring you Barbara Sumner today. Her literary memoir Tree of Strangers is one of the best books I read this year (and I'm including my non-adoption-related reading in that). Barbara and I talk about some of the painful experiences she recounts in her book. We also talk about some of the issues facing the adoptee community today, including Barbara's perspective on adoption reform vs. the complete abolition of adoption.

Full Show Notes Here

Share your voice for Adoptee Remembrance Day

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189 Tiana Nobile24 Sep 202100:50:14

Today's guest is brilliant poet Tiana Nobile whose recent collection of poems Cleave is an exceptional exploration of transnational adoption. Tiana shares her story with us from the deeply personal struggles to her in-depth research on the problematic history of adoption. Tiana also teaches us about contranyms and you'll be in awe of the perfection of the title Cleave when she unpacks that for us.

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188 Haley - Ask Me Anything17 Sep 202100:51:44

We're celebrating five years of podcasting with a special Ask Me Anything episode. Listeners submitted questions for me (Haley) from "what are your plans for the coming season of Adoptees On?" to "where would you invest a million dollars to help the cause of adoptees?" I also share a bit about this amazing leaf-teardrop hybrid painted by JS Lee.

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187 Dr. Liz DeBetta11 Jun 202100:58:11

We're coming to our summer break! What better note to end on than this encouraging episode with Dr. Liz DeBetta. Liz has been on the podcast before and shared her story of coming to her late thirties before examining the impact adoption had on her life. Today though we are strictly diving into one of her areas of expertise which is using writing as a tool for healing. Writing is accessible, it has physical, emotional, and mental health benefits. Writing can help us create a new narrative for ourselves. Liz recently lead a group of adoptees through a transformative writing group and she shares some tools we can use to start our own writing practice.

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Show Notes Recommended Resources

Just note "No, I am not available for all sessions" to skip to the "I am interested in future opportunities" part of the form.

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186 Megan Culhane Galbraith04 Jun 202101:11:39

I'm honoured to introduce you to my new friend Megan Culhane Galbraith today. Megan's brand new book, The Guild of the Infant Saviour, is out in the world and is getting rave reviews, especially from fellow adoptees. Today we talk about the challenges of building a relationship after the first moments of reunion are finally realized. Megan shares how she views the patterns of silencing adoptees from childhood into our adulthood. Did you know there used to be a program at Cornell that used "practice babies" sourced from foundling homes to teach women how to be mothers? Megan describes the impact of researching these barbaric Domecon experiments on us as adoptees, as humans turned into objects like dolls.

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185 [Estrangement Series] Lora K. Joy28 May 202101:02:41

Today I'm excited to introduce you to Lora K. Joy. Lora tells us she always knew she didn't fit in with her adoptive parents, and that she made promises to herself that she would do things differently. Lora recounts a transformative moment where she grieved her adoption loss that intrinsically changed her forever. We also unpack some of the things that lead to her decision to become estranged from her adoptive parents and how she maintains her protective boundary.

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184 [Healing Series] Sharon Stein McNamara, Ed.D.21 May 202100:46:36

Today Sharon Stein McNamara, Ed.D. is with us, sharing some of her personal story intermingled with her expertise as a psychologist. Ever wonder if therapists and psychologists are being taught about relinquishment trauma? Have you heard of how helpful Dialectical Behaviour Therapy can be for adopted people? Sharon even reveals the surprising impact reunion had on her romantic relationships.

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183 Paul Kimball14 May 202101:16:05

I'm happy to introduce Paul Kimball to you today. Paul shares his story of search and reunion and how the joy of music intertwined him with his first mother. Paul shares deeply with us about his grief from both rejection and death. Family, music, and nature have brought so much delight into Paul's life, he challenges us to make sure we're choosing to experience all life has to give and not get stuck in the hard things.

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Kit Myers21 Feb 202500:55:46

298 | Kit Myers

We've been waiting several years to have today's guest on, and when better then to celebrate his brand new book! Professor and critical adoption scholar Kit Myers is with us to talk about his new book, The Violence of Love: Race, Family, and Adoption in the United States. Kit is an adoptee from Hong Kong, and he shares some of his personal story including a recent reunion he got to experience a couple of months ago. We also dive into culture camps and what happened when society tried to "destigmatize adoption" for the sake of adoptive parents.

 

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

182 Gregory Luce07 May 202100:54:58

I am excited to introduce you to Gregory Luce today, the attorney behind Adoptee Rights Law. We get to hear some of Greg's personal story today, including the five-year court battle it took for him to receive his records. We talk about some of the typical arguments adoptee activists hear from legislators against original birth certificate access and what impact DNA testing access has had on OBC legislation. Greg also challenges us to make sure we're listening to all adoptee voices. Greg is a lawyer but he's not giving us legal advice during this episode.

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181 [Healing Series] Is Loyalty a Trauma Response?30 Apr 202100:32:15

Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC, is back this week! We are still talking about estrangement and today looking at the question - is loyalty a trauma response? Marta teaches us about "fawning" and that many of us will choose to be loyal to others before ourselves.

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Recommended Resources
  • Marta's first appearance on the podcast was episode 69 which teaches about the Internal Family Systems model and why it's helpful for adopted people. (Other episodes featuring Marta: 71, 134, 135, & 180)
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180 [Healing Series] Estrangement Through an IFS Lens23 Apr 202100:29:18

Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC, one of our favourite adoptee therapists is back on the podcast today! We are talking about estrangement through the lens of the Internal Family Systems therapy model. Marta teaches us how to listen to our parts' needs and prioritize the safety of our own identity above preserving relationships.

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179 Shannon Gibney16 Apr 202100:47:28

I'm thrilled Shannon Gibney, writer and activist is here! Shannon shares some of her personal story and how she's observed adoptee voices reaching critical mass over the last fifteen years. Since her first novel, See No Color, was released 6 years ago, she's heard from many younger adoptees who've felt seen and validated by reading her words. Shannon recounts how her experience of grief in motherhood and the adoptee experience intertwined, and how she's modelled truth-telling, even the difficult things, to her children.

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178 Ferera Swan09 Apr 202100:51:18

Ferera Swan is here to share her experiences of reunion and secondary rejection with us. We talk about the impact other members of the extended family can have on our reunions, and Ferera tells us about the meaning behind her name and what her producer encouraged to include in her song "Second Time".

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177 [Healing Series] Internalized Oppression02 Apr 202100:40:19

Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker is with us today and she is teaching us about internalized oppression. She tells us why she finds the term "coming out of the fog" somewhat problematic. If you've ever found yourself self-sabotaging, Dr. Wirta-Leiker explains this could actually be a form of self-protection. She leads us with the adoptee-first lens, keeping our mental health and well-being the top priority even when we may prioritize teaching others instead.

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176 Miguel Caballero26 Mar 202100:48:54

I get to interview some incredibly special people on the show, and today is a perfect example. I am thrilled to introduce you to Miguel Caballero. Miguel shares some of his story with us including how he got sober eight years ago. There are so many adopted people who struggle with addiction, and Miguel describes feeling that he had a birth-mother-shaped hole to fill. He's gone on to fill a great need in our community by starting the peer-led support group Adoptees and Addiction.

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175 [Estrangement Series] Justin Part 219 Mar 202100:42:04

I am honoured to be able to bring you part two of Justin's story today. Justin shares about a desire to add back his original surname and here in part two we'll see the fallout. We speculate on what about our experiences as adopted people lets us accept poor treatment that we would never allow towards those we love. Ultimately a world-shifting event in Justin's immediate family brings clarity to his relationship with his adoptive family.

*TW: Suicide

Full Show Notes Here

Show Notes Recommended Resources
  • Learn about Internal Family Systems
  • Marta Dranchenberg shares about IFS on the Healing Series episode 69 and IFS and relationships on episode 71
  • Self-Therapy: A Step-By-Step Guide to Creating Wholeness and Healing Your Inner Child Using IFS, A New, Cutting-Edge Psychotherapy by Jay Earley, PhD
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174 [Estrangement Series] Justin Part 112 Mar 202100:38:32

I am honoured to be able to bring you Justin's story today (this is part one, and we'll be back next week with part two). Justin was labelled "difficult to adopt" because he is bi-racial. He tells us that he never had an interest in finding his biological family until he attended a very interesting week-long therapeutic workshop. Justin shares about a desire to add back his original surname and in part two we'll see more of the fallout from that decision.

*TW: Suicide

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173 [Healing Series] Estrangement Part 205 Mar 202100:31:12

Part two! We are back with more VERY real talk with Pam Cordano, MFT about estrangement from our adoptive parents. Pam teaches us how important it is for us to get clarity on what is actually possible in our relationships. We also address if they won't change, it's up to us - so what are we willing to change? Our amount of engagement in the relationship? The strength of our boundaries? Which 'circle' do they safely get to have access to? This is tough stuff! Thank you for listening and walking through this with us.

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Adé Carrena07 Feb 202501:03:26

297 | Adé Carrena

I don't think we've ever had anyone on the show that shares today's guest's profession! I'm thrilled to introduce you to Chef Adé Carrena, she's the subject of a beautiful new documentary called Bite of Benin. Adé is passionate about using food as a storytelling tool and has worked to bring West African flavours and spices to a global audience. She shares some of her personal story with us today, including being taken at age ten to the United States with her sister to be adopted. We do mention some difficult topics in this episode, so take good care when deciding to listen.

 

Full Show Notes Here

 

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This podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Nothing stated on it, either by its hosts or any guests, is to be construed as psychological, medical or legal advice. Please seek out professionals in those fields if you need those services. The views expressed by the hosts of Adoptees On or any guests are their own and do not represent the opinions of any organization or other person unless otherwise stated.

172 [Healing Series] Estrangement Part 126 Feb 202100:37:39

Pam Cordano, MFT returns to guide us through some thoughts on estrangement. Why does it ever get to the point that we'd consider going no-contact with our adoptive parents? Are adoptees just "too sensitive" and take everything personally? Even through challenging topics such as this one, Pam leads us with thoughtfulness, compassion, and helps us discover what's most important.

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171 Dr. Susan Branco19 Feb 202100:53:51

Dr. Susan Branco is with us today and she is a force for good in our community. She shares an overview of her story and we get a chance to deeply focus on topics that she's done an incredible amount of work and research on. Her research includes how counselors of colour deal with client microaggressions and ensuring adoption themes make their way into the core curriculum for future social workers and therapists. Dr. Branco shares more with us about her case study of the Colombian Adoption House which includes firsthand experiences of Colombian adoptees and what happens when they find out their adoption was illicit or black-market. Her passion for family preservation is evident when we go down the list of systemic problems in the adoption industry.

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170 Alice Stephens12 Feb 202100:51:35

Alice Stephens, the author of Famous Adopted People, joins us today! I was honoured to hear her describe her childhood which included years in Botswana, and she even shares a bit about her search in Korea for biological family. Of course, we talk about writing, publishing, and her book reviews; if you ever need a book recommendation for an adoptee-centric look at adoption, Alice is an expert.

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