Our goal is to break down the business of becoming a working actor into a simple, actionable, step by step roadmap.
We'll cover everything from creative entrepreneurialism and mastering what we call the language of the agents and casting directors, to the importance of top notch training and tools for boosting your confidence in self tapes and on the set. Ready to take your acting career to the next level? Let's get started.
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Episode 365: How to Handle Difficult Family Members Over the Holidays
Season 1 · Episode 265
Wednesday, November 26, 2025 • Duration 15:26
Family gatherings can be beautiful. They can also feel like emotional landmines, especially when you're an actor. One minute you're passing the mashed potatoes. The next you're answering a pointed question about your career from someone who hasn't watched a show since 1998.
In this week's episode of the Acting Business Bootcamp Podcast, I talk about how to stay calm, centered, and grounded as you navigate family dynamics. These tools help you protect your energy so you can enjoy the holiday instead of getting swept up in other people's anxieties.
The Question Doesn't Require a Monologue
A lot of actors feel pressured to explain themselves. To defend their choices. To prove they're on the right track.
But you don't owe anyone an emotional TED Talk over stuffing.
A simple, steady answer is enough.
"It's going well. Thank you."
That one sentence keeps you out of conversations you don't need to be in. You get to keep your peace. You get to protect your space.
If someone pushes, you can set a gentle boundary. "I have a few things moving, I'll share when I'm ready."
Short. Clear. Done.
Their Anxiety Doesn't Belong to You
So often the loudest questions are really about someone else's fears. Their need for certainty. Their discomfort with ambiguity.
You don't have to take that on.
Let their energy stay with them. You return to your own center. Your own path. Your own truth.
Anchor Yourself Before You Walk In
A holiday gathering is like an unexpected audition. A little preparation goes a long way.
Take a few quiet minutes in the car before going inside. Ground your breath. Remember the work you've done. Remember what you're building. Even the smallest wins matter.
This simple pause strengthens you more than you think.
Use The Bathroom as Your Backstage
If you feel yourself getting wobbly, step away. Close the door. Breathe.
One minute is enough to reset your nervous system.
Here's an affirmation I love for holiday gatherings:
"I am my own authority. I love and approve of myself. Life is good."
Say it until your shoulders drop.
Movement Clears Emotional Static
Sometimes the easiest way to break emotional noise is to move your body.
A short walk around the block. A quick step outside. Offering to run to the store. Even a loop around the backyard.
Think of it as an intermission in the middle of the holiday play.
Grace Beats Defensiveness
If someone brings up the state of the industry or questions your path, gently redirect.
"Things are moving. I'm focused on the work. How are you doing?"
It shifts the spotlight off you. It softens the moment. It keeps the energy human.
Curiosity Transforms the Room
People want to be seen. When you become curious about them, the dynamic changes.
Ask how their year has been. Ask a follow-up. Then another.
When you listen deeply, conversations soften. Walls come down. You return to connection, not conflict.
A Final Reminder
Your career is not defined by anyone's holiday opinion. You get to be your own authority. You get to choose peace.
And if family stress gets loud this year, you're not alone.
If you've been feeling lost, stuck, or unsure of your next step, I created a one hour class called Listening to Invisible Guidance.
It teaches you how to notice the quiet nudges, how to ask for support, and how to actually hear the signs that are already showing up for you. You'll learn why doubt doesn't block guidance and why disruption can be a sign that you're being redirected, not punished.
If you need support this holiday season, send me a quiet message. I'm here.
Episode 364: Choice, Habit, Love: How Actors Build Real Momentum
Season 1 · Episode 264
Wednesday, November 19, 2025 • Duration 11:01
Actors often wait for motivation. We hope a burst of inspiration will get us moving, keep us consistent, or push us to the next level. But real growth rarely starts with motivation. It starts with one small choice.
In this episode of the Acting Business Bootcamp Podcast, I talk about the simple cycle that has changed my life many times over. Choice. Habit. Love. It's a framework you can use in your acting career, your training, and your personal development to build strength and momentum in a way that actually lasts.
The Moment I Realized Something Needed to Change
A few years ago, I was sitting on my balcony, looking out at the marina, and I caught a glimpse of myself that didn't feel like me. It wasn't about weight or appearance. It was the feeling that I wasn't living up to my potential.
It was a quiet wake up call that led to one small choice.
The First Step Is Always Choice
A friend gave me a ten minute workout. The first time I tried it, I had to stop three times. It felt impossible. But I chose to do it again the next day. And the next. Choice doesn't feel glamorous. It's rarely comfortable. But it's the doorway to every breakthrough.
How Choice Becomes Habit
After weeks of choosing that workout, something shifted. It became a habit. I added more exercise. I felt stronger, even through perimenopause and menopause. Habit grows out of showing up, not out of feeling ready.
When Habit Turns Into Love
What once felt uncomfortable became something I enjoyed. That's the surprising part. Love is the result of consistency. Love grows from seeing your own progress.
Starting Over After a Setback
Recently I got very sick and couldn't exercise for almost three weeks. When I came back, I realized I had to start again at choice. Not habit. Not love. Choice. That reminder has been grounding. Setbacks simply restart the cycle.
How Actors Can Use Choice, Habit, Love
This structure applies to your acting technique, your mindset, your self tapes, and your business systems. Ask yourself the small but powerful question: What could I choose today that would help me reach my potential?
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Episode 354: Paula Tiso on Narration for Documentaries
Season 1 · Episode 254
Wednesday, September 17, 2025 • Duration 37:44
This week's episode is all about documentary narration. Voiceover actor Paula Tiso joins me to share her journey from sketch comedy in Los Angeles to working steadily in promos, radio imaging, true crime, and documentary series.
We talk about training, the shift from "perky" reads to grounded storytelling, and what it really takes to support a story with your voice.
About Paula:
Paula Tiso is a veteran voiceover actor whose work spans documentary narration, true crime, television affiliates, video games, and more. She's voiced Smithsonian Channel documentaries, Oxygen and ID series like Living with a Serial Killer and The Devil Speaks, and brought characters to life in games including Final Fantasy X, No More Heroes, and Fallout 76.
Whether narrating history, guiding audiences through true crime, or connecting viewers to their local TV stations, Paula's voice combines warmth, authority, and authenticity.
From Comedy to Narration
Paula started out in sketch comedy and found her way into voiceover through commercial training. She explains how those early skills built the foundation for narration work across genres.
True Crime and Empathy
Narrating true crime requires neutrality and steadiness. At the same time, it calls for empathy when addressing victims and families. Paula shares how she prepares for heavy scripts and keeps her delivery both clear and compassionate.
Core Skills for Narrators
Commercial training as a base for timing and clarity
Adaptability when scripts change mid-session
Authenticity in the read, not a "performance"
Curiosity to keep learning and exploring new material
Preparation that marks cues and supports clean delivery
Types of Documentary Narration
Building a Career AI and the Future Episode Takeaways Resources and Mentions Support the Podcast Stay Connected
Episode 264: Goal Setting for 2024
Season 1 · Episode 164
Wednesday, December 27, 2023 • Duration 25:45
So today, we are going to talk about goals for the first quarter of 2024.
January through March 31st is the first quarter of the year.
We are setting 3 to 5 goals for the first quarter of 2024.
Now, the other thing is that if you do the full yearly goals, you could break that down a little bit, baby-stepping into that first quarter.
But what I want you to be thinking of is the first of the year through March 31st.
That's where I want your focus to be because it's a much more bite-sized piece to apply your goals to and your positive thoughts and actions towards.
I want to give you some questions to think about:
The first question is, with these goals that you have, where do you feel you are at in achieving them?
Talk about what you've done in the past and where that has brought you.
And then the next thing I want you to ask yourself is, looking at where you are at in achieving them and what you've done in the past, how has that made you feel?
What are your emotions around it?
If you're sick and tired of being sick and tired, you will change.
Now, the reason why I asked you where are you at in achieving them and how does that make you feel because if you did write something down, "I feel like I've let myself down, I feel like I just keep procrastinating, I feel like I'm such a loser…"
I want you right now to feel that pain. I want you to feel it.
I want you to get uncomfortable. I want you to recognize all of those things that you just said. Why? Not because I'm some masochist. No, but because I want to get you to change. If you're sick and tired of being sick and tired, you'll change.
This is one of my favorite episodes of the year. Why? Because I recap the entire year, and it's like a play-by-play of all the podcast episodes.
So, over 52 episodes, you can get a quick little like burst of what it's about and write it down and say, "Oh, I wanna listen to episode 210."
What's so incredible is that we have over 160 episodes for you to listen to all free content. And it's a great little way to celebrate the holidays by just marking down which ones you want to listen to while you do that dreaded holiday travel.
Episode 262: What to Get your Reps for the Holidays
Season 1 · Episode 162
Wednesday, December 13, 2023 • Duration 06:46
What do you get your reps for the holidays, especially this year?
Because it is this year, the year of two strikes, after, let's see, a global pandemic, and a heck of a lot of other things going on in the world, I think we can be assured that it doesn't have to be some momentous gift.
So let's say you had a Killer year, maybe in theatrical at the beginning of the year, or you had a killer print year, or a killer modeling year, or a killer commercial or voiceover year, again Wahoo!
I want to hear about it because that sounds fabulous.
If you did, you can be more generous in what I'm going to suggest.
This year, I would go for a card.
A card that says something sincere in it about how much you appreciate them sticking by you or how much you appreciate their sense of humor or something genuine.
Now, that is if it is a very lean year for you.
If it's not been a lean year and you really want to do a little something, I go to my old standard of Amazon gift cards and Starbucks gift cards.
I know that's not that imaginative, but honestly, from the casting director's point of view, it's just a token.
If you want to take it one step further, then do a little investigating. When you were there, What were they eating? Was it Chipotle? Was it Sweetgreen? Was it McDonald's? Whatever it was, they have a little thing.
Maybe you know that they love VR games.
If they do, then get them a gift card that's appropriate for that.
If you know they love going to movies, get them a movie gift card to a movie theater near their work or their home.
You can be imaginative with this.
The other thing I recommend is A charity.
You can say, listen, in light of this being a crappy year for a lot of people, I wanted to give a little donation to a charity of your choice.
Mandy Fisher is a NYC-based full-time voiceover actor with over 15 years of experience in the industry. She has worked with brands like Crayola, Disney, Peloton, Coke, Walmart, and Kohls to name a few.
Her passion for voiceover and genuine love of helping people inspire her to work with actors of all stages of their career.
With a theater background, she brings her training to guide copy analysis and character creation. As an industry vet of 15 years, she has witnessed the changes and understands the ebbs and flows of the business.
Mandy created her own voiceover business from the ground up and has a successful and replicable model to help actors build their own successful businesses.
All of this adds up to a coach who can provide audition and career advice while helping actors become the best they can be!
The first thing is, what the hell is radio imaging?
Radio imaging is when you are the voice of a radio station, not the DJ, but it's virtual branding for a radio station because they want people to when they turn on their dials to a specific radio station; they want that familiarity.
They don't want it to be confusing. They want to have that brand recognition. And that is what is done through your voice.
My next question is, how is one even hired for radio imaging?
My first kind of foray into it was by accident. And I didn't realize I was doing radio imaging as I was doing it. I didn't realize that's what it was. I started this several years ago when I was a struggling voiceover actor trying to figure my stuff out.
I was sending samples of my voice to different radio stations, like all over as many radio stations as I could look up and find on the internet. I would send them my voice and say, can I do anything for you on your radio station?
Heidi Dean is known as the industry's top social media strategist for actors and the creator of Marketing4actors.com. She's a social media writer for Backstage Magazine and a frequent speaker at film festivals, SAG-AFTRA, AEA, conferences, podcasts and universities across the country. Her clients include Emmy Award-winners, Broadway stars, series regulars, directors, producers, casting directors, voice actors and audiobook narrators. Heidi turns social media rookies into ROCKSTARS!
How the heck did you get into doing social media with actors?
The tweetable version is well, I really got my start in social media marketing and I was actually running social for my husband who is a Broadway and television actor and now audiobook narrator.
And a lot of the things we were doing for him and promoting his album and everything, just started taking off. And of course, working actors know working actors, and I started running social for other people, for actors, producers, and casting directors.
What I started to realize is that I was not just running social media for them, I was acting like them, and the people interacting with me had no idea I was this person. They had no idea. So it was enlightening to me because I realized that actually, nobody was helping actors with their social media.
You had to be like an A-lister and have media training and social media training and really have someone running your social media to actually get that kind of education.
And so that's when I started my blog, Marketing for Actors, now 2015. And really just talking about the mistakes I was seeing every day, as people interacted with me when they thought I was this producer, this casting director, or this big actor, and that's when the blog just took off because no one was helping.
Episode 259: Interview with Casting Director Maribeth Fox
Maribeth Fox has worked with Laura Rosenthal Casting for fifteen years and has had the privilege of working alongside major talents like Todd Haynes, Paolo Sorrentino, Oren Moverman, Joachim Trier, Ed Burns, Mindy Kaling, Anton Corbijn, and Lisa Cholodenko as well as up and coming feature directors, Guy Nattiv, Olivia Newman, & Paul Downs Colaizzo.
Favorite credits include Olive Kitteridge and Mildred Pierce both for HBO, Jay-Z's music video for Smile,Wonderstruck with Todd Haynes, A Quiet Place,Modern Love for Amazon and Liz Garbus' narrative feature debut, Lost Girls.
Two of her three films at the 2018 Sundance Film Festival broke sales records, Late Night and Brittany Runs A Marathon.
Most recent credits include Sharper for Apple TV, directed by Benjamin Caron, Bottoms, produced by Elizabeth Banks, Murder Mystery 2 with Happy Madison, and the upcoming A Different Man from Killer Films and A24.
How did you become a casting director?
I learned how to work with actors, what they need you to tell them, and what they don't need you to tell them about ego. And I just decided to spend five to seven minutes with actors instead of a career with them.
So I switched to casting, and I worked for CBS primetime casting for two and a half years, which was a really good learning experience, but corporate wasn't for me.
Episode 258: Handle this Family Filled Holiday Season with a Plan!
Today, I am going to talk about what is honestly sometimes a very painful thing to talk about, which is going home for the holidays.
Because actually going home for the holidays for me is a joyous thing now.
But when I was younger, it was harder. And it wasn't necessarily because of my parents, but it was things that triggered me, like the cold, like it being darker. And those kinds of things would bring up a lot of anxiety with me.
One of the things I will be talking about is triggers and how to take care of yourself around triggers.
So, what do I mean by a trigger?
A trigger for me is it gets darker earlier.
If you listen to my podcast episode 102, you'll hear that when it started to get dark when I was a child, that's when my anxiety would kick up.
Guess what happens now? It gets darker earlier.
Now, I will be honest with you: it still reminds me every year, but I also have come so far that it doesn't bother me anymore.
But I'm not going to tell you that if I get emotionally ruffled, it's not going to get kicked up again, and that's what I want you to look out for this holiday season.
Exercise:
Either on your phone, while you're listening to this or pen and paper, I want you to think of three to five things that could potentially trigger you this holiday season.
So for me, it's that it gets dark earlier. The other thing is that my family lives on the East Coast. And guess what? It's cold on the East Coast. It's freezing. That's why I live part of the year in Los Angeles because it's nice and toasty here.
You can take the 30 question Acting Business Audit. It shows you what's working in your acting business and what needs attention so you know where to focus next.
If you want guidance or support, you can schedule a consultation. I'm here to help you strengthen your confidence, materials, and next steps.
Nature: slow pacing, voice supports the picture
History: sometimes includes character inserts, with age shifts in voice
In-show and lifestyle: friendly and helpful
Promos and affiliates: concise and reliable
Paula describes narration as building a career vine by vine, one connection leading to the next. She emphasizes curiosity, preparation, and adaptability as the keys to staying relevant.
Paula also discusses how AI is impacting voiceover, and the work organizations like NAVA are doing to protect performers through transparency and consent.
Let the voice support the picture
Documentary reads today are grounded and authentic
Empathy without bias is essential in true crime
Preparation and adaptability make sessions run smoothly
Careers grow step by step, connection by connection
If you're enjoying the Acting Business Boot Camp podcast, please leave us a 5-star review wherever you listen. We're close to reaching 100 reviews, and your support makes a real difference.
There's that wonderful phrase "Do something today that yourself in year from now will thank you for."
Use your mind to govern your brain.
Perfectionism leads to procrastination leads to paralysis.
Now, I have one more journal question for you:
How do you feel when you do not do what you said you were going to do?
When you have a thought, that thought leads to an emotion and then to an action. Which then goes back to reiterating that initial thought.
I want you now to make three columns.
I want you to put one of your goals in the first column.
So you're going to put down one of your goals.
And then, in the second column, I want you to write down some thoughts that support that goal.
So, if my goal is to be a working actor, the thought or thoughts that you would want to write in that second column are I am a successful working actor.
I go from success to success in my acting career.
I love myself, and I approve of myself.
So some good positive affirmations around that goal. Because your thoughts need to back up that goal.
What else needs to back up that goal? Your actions.
So, I want you to take a look at whatever that goal is, and I want you to think of one to three small actions that you can take towards that goal.
What's your goal?
What are the thoughts that support the goal?
What are the baby actions that you can take towards supporting that goal?
And that is the secret to success.
It's your thoughts, and your actions must back up what you want.
I want you to go back now and look at your goals, and I want you to put next to them, whether they are a habit goal or an achievement goal.
So let's say I want to take a vacation in 2024, a two-week vacation in 2024. You need to save up for that. That's an achievement goal.
But let's say you want to practice your voice five times a week for half an hour each one of those times. That is a habit goal.
So take a moment and review all the goals you have written down and write down if they are habits or achievement.
I want you to look at each one of your goals, and I want you to ask yourself, is it a goal that is actually achievable or attainable by the end of the quarter?
Or is it a quarter/year project?
It should make you just a little uncomfortable.
If you babystep your goals enough so that those baby steps are something that you eagerly put yourself forward to do that help you to move in that direction, that is something that is great.
Again, that is great because it builds self-esteem. It builds confidence.
Now, I want you to look at your goals and I want you to ask yourself questions about them.
What is my motive for making my first goal, second goal, third goal happen for me?
What will I get out of making it happen? What is my motive?
We do things because there is something in it for us. And it's okay to be selfish.
When you get to those times when you really do not feel like doing the action step for your goal, you can remind yourself what your motive is.
And that's when you can really start asking yourself. How bad do I want it?
I consider that question to be the secret ingredient.
I operate like this all the time because not every single day do I feel like doing things towards my goals.
But when I remind myself what my motive is, I remind myself how it's going to feel when I achieve it. Ooh, baby, that lights a fire under my ass.
Ask them.
ASPCA and Women for Women International are the two charities of Acting Business Boot Camp. We give a portion of our proceeds every month to those two charities.
Broadway Cares, Equity Fights AIDS, that's always a great one for the industry.
The Actors Fund is another charity that's fantastic for the industry.
You can do stuff like that, too.
I always feel these things are better than alcohol or cookies because then they get to choose and they get to have something that's special for them.
And I also love those gifts where somebody gave it a little more thought.
Do some homework on this.
Think about it. What would your reps really like?
And honestly, if it's just a card with something nice, that's perfect.
Just take that moment. Stop and take that moment and think about what you most appreciate them.
Thank you for noticing me.
Thank you for seeing me, seeing my talent, and believing in me.
Do you need anything? Is there anything I could do? And they would say, Oh yeah. And they would throw me a couple of lines, and that was radio imaging at the time; I had no idea that's what that was.
But now you can still do that; by the way, you can still absolutely reach out to station managers and say, Hey, I like your radio station.
I'm a big fan. I think I could fit in with your other radio imagers.
So you can always absolutely reach out to a station manager, but I work with a specific manager, not an agent, a specific manager who handles my radio imaging career; that is definitely a way because he has all of these connections and has been in the business for a very long time. So, if you're really interested in forging a career in radio imaging, I would suggest trying to get a manager to do that because it's a close-knit group and tons of station managers know each other, and they've got this sort of radio world that they're in.
It feels very different than other verticals of voiceover.
So, if that's a passion, I would say try to get a radio imaging manager.
So, let's actually talk about the difference between a manager for voiceovers and an agent for voiceovers.
It's very similar to the theatrical world, where agents are in voiceover. You are almost expected to freelance with several agents in non-competing markets.
I don't know of any full-time voice actors who only have one agent.
And they're going to source auditions for you. They're going to help you in different verticals of voiceover, whichever kind of vertical you're interested in.
A lot of people have a commercial voiceover agent. And if that agency doesn't have an interactive department, they'll find an agent who specializes in interactive or audiobooks or radio imaging or whatever, but a manager is someone who will really handle the career aspect of your voice-over world.
So, very similar in theatrical where you have agents who source auditions for you and are less handholdy than, say, a manager who will craft some of the other things, help you with your pitches, help you with your demos, give you feedback, really be there to help you along your career.
Interactive is all things animation, video games, toys and games, things outside of commercials, audiobooks, long-form, e-learning, or anything else.
It is the umbrella of animation, video games, mobile, and that kind of world.
First, is there anything you want to say more about radio imaging?
Yeah, I would say, if you're interested in doing it, I wouldn't say it's necessarily hard to get into, but I would say if you don't have a lot of experience in voiceover, you should try to take like a promo class or a commercial class or improv class.
Because you do need to provide a lot of variety, and usually it's short little lines that they're going to cut into what's happening on the air alongside the DJ and other people, other guests, whatever on the show and songs and what you're listening to.
So they like to have a ton of variety.
That variety is going to help you book with more stations because they don't want the plain, boring, or the overly kind of sticky sound that was of long ago and is no longer popular these days.
But you wouldn't know if you didn't know that and taking classes like promo, commercial, and even radio imaging classes exist.
Before you start pitching yourself in that area, try to get a bit more knowledge so that you are prepared and can start getting radio stations under your belt.
I'm saying the same line over and over again, but it is in multiple different ways.
So anything else regarding radio imaging besides the fact that we're going to have you now tell us about these VO gyms that you've been doing for acting business boot camp that people are just freaking loving that people can either attend and participate or they can audit.
It's amazing for me. I love getting to work with actors. I love getting to, it's educational for me as well because I love seeing what people come up with because what I would do in copy is different than what someone else would do. So seeing that variety, getting that variety from everybody, is a gift to me.
But it is so much fun. Working with actors who are just eager to work, being a part of an environment where it is safe and fun, supportive, hopefully, it's educational, and people are learning from me. It is a blast.
Auditing classes, I think, is so valuable, especially if you don't know the teacher. If you don't know them sometimes taking a class and working in a class with someone you don't know can be very intimidating.
I understand how this person works and their sense of humor is how they are, and you can decide then, all right I feel comfortable working with them in the future, or maybe not. I got what I got from them, and I can move on.
If you see an opportunity to audit, obviously, you should participate first, in my opinion, but if you don't know the teacher, it's a great vetting tool. It usually is for less than the actual price of the class.
You're combining voiceover business skills and you're combining core work big. You're like one of my biggest fans on that one. So, can we talk about how amazing you are working with someone one on one building, teaching them how to build a six-figure voiceover career?
How do you do that?
Building a six-figure voiceover business is not easy, and it's hard to sustain. And I've definitely had years where it hasn't been six figures. I've definitely had years where it has been that and plus and that's all great, but it's.
For me to achieve that, it hasn't been about chasing the money, because if you're chasing the money, I think in any entertainment field, you're going to get burnt out. It's not a sustainable way. It's not a good way to look at your career from a holistic bird's eye point of view for the long term.
Sure, money is achievable in the entertainment field, but if that's what you're doing, especially in voiceover, you'll get burnt out very quickly. You're probably going to get depressed very quickly, and all of the investments you've made to get to where you are right now will feel heavier and will make you feel heavier and it will be harder for you to climb out of that.
So don't think about the money. Sometimes I get auditions that are like huge $50,000 for the job, $100,000 for the job. Of course, my heart quickens a little when I see jobs like that come through, but you have to treat every job the same way, the $250 jobs up to the $100,000 jobs, because it's not about getting the money.
It is about being remembered by the casting directors and the people that you are working with.
That's such a working actor mentality.
It's about being remembered.
It is about making choices in your audition and having the opportunity to perform for somebody.
Anytime you have an opportunity to use your skills for somebody, you have this opportunity to showcase your abilities, that's a gift right there and giving that to them for them to remember you is that's your goal, baby.
That is the goal, which is how you will build your business.
Any other words of wisdom before we go, Mandy, that you would like to impart?
Just know that voiceover is the long game.
If you are in it for a career, look; if you're in it as a hobby, God bless. There's plenty of hobbyist work out there that you can go and pursue and not have. The mindset of it being part of your business.
But if you're in it as a careerist, you need to think like a careerist.
You need to treat it as a business, not just something fun to do but something sustaining you both creatively and financially as part of your career.
Just remember, it's not about chasing that money. It's a long game, for sure.
AI.
AI has been around for a long time and has only recently reared its ugly head in the entertainment industry, specifically towards voiceover.
I haven't read the agreement yet, so it's hard to comment on everything.
But I do think I've had many a client this year, big clients. I have quote unquote lost them to AI and they said, "Sorry, we're no longer going to utilize your services. We're going to go the route of AI. And Thank you very much."
Months later, this was actually like at the beginning of the year.
And then they came back to me around June or July. And they said, "Hey, are you still available? Because we really don't like it. It's not for us. We tried it. It sounds okay, but we prefer working with a human being, and we prefer working with you."
So I've lost them, quote-unquote, and they have come back.
I think it's going to be a mixture.
It's just going to be a new learning curve of how we will work alongside it, not against it.
And there was a need that nobody was fulfilling unless you paid thousands of dollars every month to have someone run it for you.
How important is it for actors to be on social media?
It's important for so many reasons, and I feel like the conversation gets stuck on followers all the time.
I love that you're asking this because, like I said, I think this conversation of like, How important is it? Why is it important?
It tends to get stuck on this conversation about followers and I think it's the wrong way to approach it and it's not even the most important reason to be on social media.
So let me give you a couple of reasons why I think it's important and hopefully, that's going to help reframe some things for your listeners. Yeah.
First of all, it's like almost 2024. You may be listening to this in 2024 and social media is just part of the world. It's, and it's becoming part of your job, right?
Your next gig is probably going to have posting guidelines. They're gonna have some guidelines about when you can post, when not to post, what to post. There may even be posting requirements in your contract, which, just so you know, it's actually a powerful thing. If they require you to post, and you have any kind of audience, ask for more money.
This is powerful, okay?
So you may have guidelines, you may have requirements. Your next job could have an Instagram takeover or they could ask you to go live or do live tweeting.
These are all just reality.
So it's becoming part of your job.
It's also part of your first impression. We know this business has gone virtual and people are looking you up all the time. It's a business of referrals and also, people, they need to know who you are.
So they're going straight to social, they're going to Google, and guess what pops up for a Google search for your name.
Your social media, your bio, you can read it right from a Google search.
So if you're using social media, I want to make sure it looks professional because it is part of your first impression.
Another reason I think it is so important is that it can help you get cast and this is not just about followers, but yes, whether you like it or not, having an actual, real live social media following can help you get cast.
But I don't want to sit on that idea. I've witnessed it over and over again, social media helping actors get cast in so many other ways, from my students sharing a post with their special skills.
Or creating a post that has a certain location hashtags or special skills hashtags and people went online and they were looking for an actor with that skill and now they're auditioning.
It happens all the time or even now that we've been gifted vertical videos like TikTok and reels and Youtube shorts you have all been given a virtual stage to perform and yes actors are getting cast all the time because of it so you know It can help you get cast beyond the followers reason, right?
Honestly, I think the biggest reason, it helps you build relationships and your relationships are your career.
I always say your network is your net worth as an actor and social media can help expand this network and you can actually put yourself in circles of the people you want to know.
But even more than that. It's the world's best tool for staying top of mind with the people you already know.
And I really believe it's the people who already know you and your work, that's the fastest way to booking new work because they already know and trust you, right?
For those four reasons alone I feel like social media is such a powerful thing for an actor.
If you're looking at it the right way.
Because one thing I would say is, I can tell you everything I just told you. I could give you a hundred more reasons, but it's not going to matter if you don't switch your mindset toward social media.
I've worked with thousands and thousands of actors on their social media and I can basically group them into two categories with how they approach their social media.
We've got, actor A and actor B, they're both looking at the same pathway of stones, and actor A sees these social media stones as stumbling blocks, something they have to do.
Why do I have to be on social media? It's a waste of time. I just want to act, that's actor A.
Now actor B sees the same path of stones as stepping stones for opportunity to, build their influence, to grow an audience for themselves, to meet more people in the business or as a virtual stage, for their talents, and you're never going to get good at something that you hate or you don't want to do.
So if actor A, the actor that looks at social media as a stumbling block, looks familiar, I want you to switch that mindset and start seeing social media as a stepping stone because you're never going to get good at it if you don't want to do it.
You've got to make that switch.
You're never going to get good at it if you don't want to do it.
We all want to be actor B.
Learn how to love auditioning because you're going to be auditioning for the rest of your life in some way or form, even if you're being offered stuff, you're still going to be auditioning, when you meet a new up-and-coming director, when you have those new opportunities in your life.
Can you quickly talk about know, like, trust factor?
In terms of relationships, this is a business of you will get more jobs from people who already know and trust you than just random auditions, right?
It's a business of referrals.
It's a business of who you know, and who knows you.
So the more people that can know and trust you know and trust your talents, know and trust your accountability and that you're consistent, you're going to show up and that you deliver in the room, the more opportunities you will have.
When I talk about relationships, I actually invite actors to first look at the people who already know them. Because, like I said, those are the people that know and trust them. If we can stay, the more they can stay in contact with them between that, the phone ringing, the email coming in for an audition, the more auditions they will get.
And that's what social media can do is it can, help you stay top of mind. It can help increase that know and trust factor.
And the reality is that meeting new people online, it can create a relationship and also build that know and trust factor online. So it actually ends up being an audition, being an actual new connection as well.
Your network is your net worth.
How you stay in touch with people that you know in this business is going to change the trajectory of your career.
Who do you know and how well are you staying in touch with these people?
It will change your career. Your network is your net worth.
What is a good social media following for an actor to aim for?
A following is not their goal. Like I actually when I work with my clients and students I would say, okay, let's figure out what your goal is.
Is it to share your talents? Is it to share your projects? Is it to build relationships? Is it to grow an audience? What is it? It might be a combination, but what are the main, what is your main goal? Because it doesn't have to be to grow a following at all. And that is completely fine.
What I want you to do is make sure you're growing your following with every job you book.
So whether it's fans of that project or people, the casting directors, the producers, the associates, everybody, fellow actors, you're always building your following with every job you book because you're getting these little fans, whether it's the fans of the project or the fans that, are working with you on the project.
So I do want to put that out there first because, in terms of numbers, this is impossible to answer really, because if you talk to people in the industry there are smaller projects that, having a hundred thousand followers, even having 10,000 followers and the other person up for the job has no social media.
That's a that's an advantage because you're a team player.
You have more people you can share it with.
But when we're talking like big blockbusters, we're talking millions of followers really turn, make it make a difference. And a lot of times it's just the tipping point.
At that point, both actors are right for the role. They both are funny and beautiful. They're both right. But one person has a larger audience. And a lot of times now, I really want people to hear this. We're in a different time in the past. This used to be an influencer. Now, you're getting [00:15:00] Juilliard trained.
Actors, you're getting NYU-trained actors. You're getting, conservatory-trained actors that are growing they're following. So it's not just, it's this person that's never had an acting class getting a job. It's actually trained actors that are taking control of their career and growing their following.
That's something I hear a lot too. It's people saying, oh, it shouldn't be about followers. I'm like these people are, they're taking control. And I do want everybody to hear this too. If you're becoming an actor in this career, it's hard to hear. This career has always been a popularity contest.
We have different metrics now with social media. So the job you got into in the first place, it's always been about putting butts in the seats, whether that's a movie theater or a theater, it's just the metrics are slightly different now, and we can complain about it, but that hasn't changed much.
The thing that has changed. Actor B. You can grow your audience. That's the thing that changed. And in the past, you couldn't control that. You can grow an audience now.
And I wanna say again, I'm putting in a plug to be actor B, a stepping stone.
The biggest mistakes I see actors make, and I think it comes out of this idea of, they're so set on hearing about followers, is that they treat their follower count like a number instead of a person.
Stop seeing numbers, start seeing the people behind that number. You're not just growing a number, you're growing an audience, you're growing a community, and I encourage all my students, all my clients, to not call it a following, but to call it an audience.
Number one, I don't know an actor out there who doesn't need an audience, performing for yourself, but you're growing an audience; these are actual people with actual struggles and hopes and dreams, just like every single one of you.
And I really want everyone tuning in, look at your follower count and I want you to think about it. If you have 400 to 500 followers, you filled a 747 airplane. If you have 3,500 followers, that's the audience at the Oscars. If you have 1,800 followers, you filled the Hollywood Bowl.
That's a whole lot of real people. I want you to think of these as people, not just numbers, and take five minutes, hop into the comments of your post, and have a conversation with some of your audience. Or click over some of your followers accounts and show them some love on their post.
Make a connection. Because when you make this switch, everything changes for your social media. And you start approaching followers in a whole different way.
And you're trying to get more and more numbers when you're not even honoring the followers that you have.
I'm going to share with you what I think is the biggest mistake that actors make in social media. "I'm having a really tough day today."
And they shoot that. Because what that makes me as a casting director go is, "Okay, that person's emotionally unstable."
That's rough to say, but I don't feel that's appropriate to share on social media. What I want to know is that the actor that I'm hiring, I need people who are emotionally stable, they are going to show up early, going to be prepared, they're not going to bring their shit into the room, and they're going to concentrate on what I consider the actor's most important thing to do, which is they're going to focus on the work and getting the job done.
Because honestly, once we get into a studio, once we get in on a set, the most important thing is the work.
I also realized that I might be having a generational thing here go on, but keep in mind that a lot of people from my generation are in, are watching it, and are going, my husband and I, who I do a lot of casting with, he goes, "Oh my God, did you see so and so's post?"
And that's not reflecting well on that actor.
Now, it's not that we don't have compassion. That person is having a bad day or, is going through a tough time and I'm not talking about I just put my animal down or my mom just died and sharing about that verbally.
I'm talking about, you're in the car, and you're just crying and sharing about whatever. I just find it, for me as a casting director, it does not reflect well on you.
Now, mind you, if I need that person for a particular job, of course, I'm going to hire them. I think it comes from a couple of places.
I think some of them are doing it for views and I immediately know when they're doing it for views, which makes me not like, know, and trust them anymore.
My trust in that the actor would be able to get onto a set the next day goes down.
I invite you to take the Insta out of your Instagram.
As an actor, you're a public figure. So number one, if you are a parent of a child actor, take the insta out of your Instagram. You should never be shooting at the Magic Kingdom when you are there.
Take the insta out of your Instagram for safety, for spoilers. Too many projects have been spoiled because you shot something thinking you weren't giving anything away but your location did or something did.
When we take the insta out of Instagram, we're able to take that second and really ask, put together a good post and should we be posting this?
And it directly relates to what you just talked about as well. If something just happened, I think it is a generational thing, some people just turn on the camera and go and, as your career goes, you need to take a pause.
And, either enjoy the moment or deal with a moment.
Really take the time to reflect on what you're going to say. It does not happen just because it happened right now doesn't mean you have to post about it right now.
And I feel like when you take that little bit of time, it does make us create a different post, usually a better post, and tell a better story with what's happening.
Even if you're hopping on video, it's going to help you make a better video for watch time, which more people will see, if you just take a second to think about what you're saying.
Stop, take a step back, observe. Is this healthy for me? Is this unhealthy for me? Respond.
A response is a reaction with a pause and a thought behind it.
And that's precisely what you're saying here. Just because it happened right now does not mean you have to post it right now.
What platform should actors be most active on in 2024.
It's hard for me just to give a blanket answer for everybody here because your social networks which you choose, should always be based on your goals, no matter if it's 2023, 2024, 2030, it always has to be on goals.
I want you to write down these questions.
This is what I do with my students, my clients.
These questions will help you decide if the platforms you're using are right for you and your goals.
They're also really good to go through when there's a new platform that you're not sure if you should use.
Yeah, grab your name on that platform, but these questions will help you decide if you should play there.
So write these questions down.
Number one, will this platform help me reach my career goals?
Number two, does it help me with my networking?
Meaning do the industry pros I know and do the people I want to know spend any time there?
And then number three, after you have learned the 101 of that platform, do you actually enjoy it?
Use the networks that play to your strengths and talents. It's not the same for everyone. Like I said, you're never going to get good at something that you don't like to do.
Does it help you reach your career goals?
Does it help you with your networking?
And do you enjoy it?
And there's a bonus question, too, so I guess it's really four: if you're in a show, do the fans of the project spend time there?
And that's important because sometimes you like a certain platform, maybe you love Facebook, and you've been there forever, but the show you're on, all the fans are on X, or they're on Instagram, or maybe they're on TikTok.
Every job you do is an opportunity to gain a fan base.
And if the fans are on a different platform, you should be spending time there.
Now, I want to reframe this question a little bit instead of what platform for 2024. I want instead of what platforms I want to think about what features.
So many actors are afraid of vertical video: the vertical video thing, TikTok, Instagram Reels, YouTube Shorts. Vertical video is the future, which is now; it was the future two years ago.
I have been preaching this. I've been preaching TikTok for a while, but I've been preaching Instagram Reels since the day it came out; I think it was August 5th; I know this because I was camping for my daughter's birthday in 2020.
That's how long Instagram reels have been out, and I know some of you have never made one.
Vertical video.
It does not mean dancing on TikTok. It doesn't have to be lip-syncing, pointing at things, or doing trends. It could be you sharing your talents with the world, with a video that is just shot vertically.
Vertical video is the best way to get more views on your talents. Vertical video is not going away. Video is not going away.
I want to challenge everyone listening today to lean into more video in 2024 and beyond.
Because it's so important, you're actors. We need to see you on video. It will change the game. Okay. So choose platforms based on your goals, but please lean into features that are going to help reach your goals and share your talents as well.
And I know this is scary for people. It's so funny because actors they're on camera, but it's scary for actors.
A great resource for you. Totally free.
My YouTube channel. I have a billion videos on Reels, TikTok, and all of those things. Plus, my recent videos how to be more confident in videos for social media.
That's going to be a good first step for you to push past and start using features that are going to help you.
I wanted to do more film, and I wanted to be freelance so my eight-week job with Laura turned into 16 years.
How does a casting director get a film job?
So oftentimes, we are one of the first people hired and production companies hire us, producers that know us, that know what The material is that we're drawn to.
Sometimes we're hired by our directors who you hope to get repeat business if you've worked with them before.
The first thing we'll do is read a script to make sure we're creatively aligned and feel like we strategically know how to cast the job. And then we're offered one of two situations.
The first situation is. Attach names to this to green-light the rest of the financing. So we do that side, and then sometimes people come attached to a film, which is wonderful news.
And they're like, "We just want you to cast this movie if you like it. And this is who's doing it."
So we're normally found by producers and directors, and we're one of the first hires.
So, just a question I have: if you are asked to attach a name talent, and let's say it's one part, let's make this real simple, Sure.
How long does it generally take to cast a film, would you say, to attach that kind of name talent if it's a good script?
It's a long time.
It's a long time, so much so that Laura has received producorial credit on quite a few of her features because of the time, attention, and effort it takes to get those attachments in place.
You think about somebody, let's say you're offering something to somebody like Julianne Moore. It could take a month for her to read it. Not because she doesn't read quickly but she's got a lot going on. And somebody of that ilk, their whole team, has to read it.
She has to read it. Everybody has to have an opinion. They have to have a discussion about it. And so we try our best to set respectful boundaries with agents and managers to say, "We really need this to be read by this time."
But if a creative team is invested in a certain person, oftentimes, that deadline will stretch.
So you could be with one actor for a month or more.
We try to get them sometimes to line up like their top three for each part if we're doing more than one part so that if there is a pass, it's not an utterly crushing situation.
The producers knew that a writer strike was imminent, and I was a little shocked to hear what you said, that you stopped getting calls about six months before.
Can you talk about that and what that was like?
It's helpful to know just in terms of our similarity to what actors go through that a lot of our business is independent film and that really continued. That was not a problem. We were still getting calls. We were still getting pings for that, but in terms of the book of business that would streamers and network, which is a lot of people's businesses, they anticipated the strike.
And normally, we have no shortage of things to read, think about, sign on to, or not sign on to.
And I think all casting directors experienced a similar shut-off. That was very different than the strike in 2008 where we were out of work for a little while, but no big deal.
But yes, like the work has been. It's been different this time around.
How has it been different, do you feel?
So I think a lot of people feel, there's a lot of feelings this time around. Where, as there should be, right? I obviously heartily support the actors and what they're going through, and it's, it's time, right?
It's time to do this and ensure everybody gets what they're owed fairly. And also, I think there is, within the SAG interim agreement, there's some stuff where I think we all need to work together in community to understand what everybody does and what everybody is going through and maybe have a little bit of empathy and open conversation and understanding because right now, it has felt a little bit of an angrier time and I understand it.
Also, It's hard to think about what life will be like after the strike ends, and I don't know.
I think a backlog of projects stopped right before the strike or started to shoot, not believing the strike would fully happen. And those are the things that are going to start to go first. And those things are already crewed up.
So, from my perspective, could it be an influx of new work? Maybe. I sure hope so. But also, we have to think about all the stuff that got interim agreements is stuff that mostly was already staffed.
And so I wonder how much the huge influx, or if it's just going to be figuring out what's actually going to shoot now and what's going to be put to the side.
The great news is that I think you're right about the flood. And actors will feel it. And start to work and self-tape again. And hopefully, it'll get back to business as usual.
And I think what's very important for actors to understand is it's not only you who is on strike, it's everybody.
I'm so proud to stand with the actors that I love and support in my day to day.
And absolutely, we are with you a thousand percent. And also, it's real, right? Many people have turned to survival jobs that they haven't had since they were 22.
Everybody's done. Employment is out. And you live in an industry town, so every business is thoroughly affected by the lack of availability of income for people.
The actors are the ones who are fighting and are going to get the benefits but do remember when you get on the set, there were a bunch of other people who were fighting right along with you, who are not going to get necessarily, the benefits that you were fighting for.
They were supporting you, but the hairdressers aren't going to get any more pay, or hair stylists, the grips aren't going to get anything.
I think that AI is an existential crisis for actors, and I don't think that is something I cannot give up my voice and my likeness and have you pay me once and that be okay, so I do think it's a worthy fight and as you said, it's a definite fight.
I also think it's in the forefront of what humanity will be dealing with. Bartenders will be dealing with it, taxi drivers will be dealing with it, it just has come. Not here first, but here.
We don't do any background casting, and I don't know what that life is.
But I do think about that entire loss of an industry. That will go first, right? And it already has started to go. They take your picture; they can pump you in if they need an arena full of people. I've had many family and friends during this time try to like talk in a fun way about chat GPT and those types of services.
And they're like, have you played around with it? I'm like, no, I don't want to help it get smarter.
And I think it will have real ramifications, and it already is having ramifications for our industry. No, I'm not going to hang out on that service, but thank you so much for asking.
What do you want actors to know [00:18:00] about self-tapes?
So many things. The first thing is it's a grocery store sample. If you're at Costco, yep, that's exactly right. If you're at Costco and the old woman is serving you pizza, you're not going to steal the whole pizza. You're going to take your sample of a square.
We do not expect a fully baked moment for a self-tape. I think artists are artists, and folks are getting bored. And so there's a lot of Heavy wardrobe, heavy movement choice the ability and the time to make almost like a short film.
It's not the job.
A self-tape should look different than how you would behave if you're on a set with a DP.
I think the other thing that I've noticed that I've started to see as self-taping goes on and on, as a public service announcement for actors, is... You're getting too good at them, and I'm going to explain more.
I think actors are really great at self-taping now, and it can almost feel robotic at times. Because they've gotten so good at knowing and thinking about, their mentality has shifted from what I want to put forward as an artist that's unique to how can I get this job by thinking about what they might want.
And so then they know what pace to do. They know what tone it is. They've done their research and all of those brave, bold choices start to get ironed out and it's safe acting work.
It's still beautiful work, but it's safe because they're so good at it.
They know exactly what they might want instead of infusing their own artistic uniqueness in the mix.
And I think casting directors hear the plight of actors, and I think something great that's going to come out of the strike is, I think there's going to be more options offered.
So some actors love the self-tape process and bless, please, if that's how you feel comfortable, wonderful. I will still take time to adjust you via Zoom. If you need an adjustment, if I get your self-tape and there's something close to there, I will still take time for you on Zoom and say, hey, and we'll workshop it together.
But then there's, we really do hear actors that they want more of us again.
I do think that in-person chem reads and callbacks will start to come back.
In the meantime, I think casting directors are far more open to reopening Zoom rooms, to make sure that we're available in some tech-helpful live way so that we can make better connections with actors.
I still get lovely, vibrant self-tapes on everything that I do. But generally, I think, there's a mindset that I've been thinking a lot about that actors carry that is, I think trained into a lot of people that it's just a scarcity mindset.
And so you come out of school and you're told that your job is so hard. There are so many people competing. You're in constant competition. There's not a ton to go around. SAG releases their statistics that only 3 percent of actors are working. And it creates this mindset that can be helpfully hungry and eager.
And it can also really destroy the artistic spirit of what an artist has to offer.
I think within that scarcity mindset, the goal of this is how I feed my family. This is how I gain health insurance, pension, and welfare. And I can't make that brave, bold choice because we don't have a casting director anymore.
You don't have us in the room to be like, "Okay, let's just do that a little bit faster here. I know the director wants this. Let's just clip it up."
Or give you a simple redirect that could really change your performance.
Now, a lot of us are doing that. We are adjusting people who give great self-tapes.
Actors feel like I've got one shot at this. I'm sending it off into the void. It better be exactly what I think they want.
The one thing that I have always stood by is that it's one audition in a lifetime of auditions.
I am going to get the opportunity to audition again, and there is enough work for everyone.
What's important for me is what's going on in the work.
People ask me, "what do you look for in an actor?"
And I'm like I'm looking for the actor who shows up a bit early, not too early. Knows they are, knows themselves. They are good at their job and I'm also looking for someone who when the work starts, they're focused on the work and not what I think of their work.
Actors do have it tough in the sense that, it's the only art form where you have nothing to stand behind.
You're not painting a picture to show me. You're not singing a song, which is separate from your acting. You're not doing a dance, which is your body and your emotions. But it's just you; it's just your subjective raw emotion.
And I think what a lot of actors specifically, I love my New York actors in our market, they've all been to school. They're all crafty, great actors.
And I think that a lot of actors think, "Gosh, I must be doing something wrong."
And so much of film and television is just subjective look-based. If you're in an audition with me, you're probably a well-trained, good actor.
And so it's not about someone being such a better actor than you are. It's about the dinner party atmosphere we're trying to create. And somebody was a better fit. So we invited that person to the dinner party and not you this time. And that's hard.
You can be the most talented actor in the world.
You get the opportunity, but ultimately it does come down to who doesn't blink at the end.
And I also feel that it's the person who knows they are good at their job.
And what I want to give actors the perspective of is, you know what? Maybe you're doing everything right.
Maybe you're doing everything right. And you just need to keep doing that.
Because a lot of times, it's about what's being written. Are there roles for you right now that really fit your marketing package and your type?
Do you fit the world? With our eyeballs. And so that has nothing to do with your craft a lot of the time.
You do have to think about this as a business. And so you think about putting somebody on set, and when we get to cast somebody and it's their first job on a set like that's a great day.
There is like buoyancy and adaptability that we're looking for in people to be able in that callback setting to turn something on their head if needed, to be able to take direction quickly. And if they're not understanding what we mean or what the director means, ask a question. Nobody's going to think you're stupid.
Nobody's going to think you can't hear it well, or like that you don't agree.
It's okay.
We all have days when we're not that great at our jobs.
If I give an actor a direction that's not clear, I don't want them to yes to me and nod their head. I want them to ask me a question and follow it up. If you're not understanding, then the two takes are going to look exactly the same.
Read the directions out loud.
I think it's really important that when you get a breakdown and, they say, submit it this way and, specifically, do your slate at the end.
One of the things that I encourage the actors I work with is to really, read the directions out loud, then you know you've heard it, and highlight anything that's specific.
Speaking of breakdowns, I think. A lot of times, people's focus on the breakdown will be the small adjective-filled description that we write instead of knowing that if you've got the audition, the breakdown has already done its job, that part of your job has already been done, your agent or manager or you submitted yourself based on the breakdown.
I saw your headshot. I selected you. Now it's done.
So you briefly look at the breakdown and ensure you're in the realm, but actors often get old breakdowns. And it's not because we're lazy. It's because we don't want to resubmit a breakdown with a subtle change to hundreds of agents and managers.
So if an actor gets a breakdown and they're 55, the breakdown says 30 to 40, they freak out or they think their manager or agent isn't doing a good job.
It's you just got an old breakdown; you don't have to worry about that anymore.
Focus on the work.
My parents also live in the country. And for some reason, even though in L. A. I'm in the middle of nowhere in the middle of L.A., and I, for some reason, get very triggered by the cold and the night and being isolated.
So those are the three things that trigger me. And I want to ask yourself what your things are.
Is it a family member who says, "Oh, wow, that strike? Hey, are you even going to still have a career?"
Whatever Uncle, whoever Aunt, your mom, your dad, that older brother.
I recently heard from a dear friend of mine that his older brother used to put him down a bit. And although time has passed, it's still a trigger.
So, write down your three to five triggers. If you have more, that's fine.
Then, what I want you to do is I want you to think of a contrary thought or an alternate thought that you can say to yourself if you start to get triggered.
One of them, which is the ultimate Truth, is this too shall pass.
Or reminding yourself, is there something soothing you can do for yourself?
One of the things I like to do is have these special peppermints. My mom gave me them. They're Dutch peppermints. I like to have them in my pocket. It's just a little thing that comforts me.
Also, sometimes, putting my hand on a particular area of my shoulder comforts me.
So it's things that I can think of and things that I can do.
You want to think of an alternate thought and an alternate action.
With an alternate thought, as I said, "This too shall pass," but also, a good thought would be, "It's going to be okay. I got you. It's going to be okay."
Reminding yourself that the Universe is on your side.
One of the things that I do is light a candle that makes me feel safe because it reminds me of the presence of the Universe and that I'm not alone, that this too shall pass, that I'm going to be okay and that I love myself.
I approve of myself and that I've got myself emotionally during that time.
The thing is, and Melody Beattie talks about it in Language of Letting Go, for some people, it's Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or whatever you celebrate; it's that time of year.
And for some people, it's like the worst trifecta in the world, which is Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's, or Thanksgiving, winter holidays, and New Year's, and they're like, "Oh God, I just want to get through."
How can you take care of yourself this holiday season?
One of the ways you can is to write down those potential triggers and create a plan.
Create a plan of positive thoughts. Create a plan of positive actions that are going to help you.
What are you going to do if you get triggered?
Are you bringing a pet with you? Is there a pet where you're going that you can go to?
Is there a relative who you know you're safe with?
What can you do to take care of yourself?
Remember, you also have this podcast. There are so many core messages. In this podcast, I've done over a hundred of them.
Bring it with you. Bring me with you on your holidays.
I'm more than happy to be your companion.
Write to me if you get scared. I'm here. peter@actingbusinessbootcamp.com
The thing is, have your own back. Have a plan. If you need to, go a little late and leave a little early.
And also remember, you can just listen.
That's one of the best things somebody told me about triggering situations. When you're in a triggering situation, start asking the person about how they're doing. What's going on in their life? You don't have to prove anything to anybody.
Do you know what you need to do this holiday season?
You need to love yourself and take care of yourself.
And how do you do that? Write down those potential pitfalls, those potential triggers, and then write out your thought plan and write out your action plan of how you are going to get yourself through.
Because you know what? You can do it. You are capable.
You can manage this holiday season.
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