Explore every episode of the podcast A Season of Caring Podcast
Dive into the complete episode list for A Season of Caring Podcast. Each episode is cataloged with detailed descriptions, making it easy to find and explore specific topics. Keep track of all episodes from your favorite podcast and never miss a moment of insightful content.
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Tender Strength in the Valley: Stories of Hope with Carol Evans
Caregiving can start with a few check-ins, then turn into a full-time reality before you even have words for it. We sit down with Carol Evans, a mom, business owner, and fellow podcast host, as she shares the tender and difficult story of caring for her mom through a short, intense battle with pancreatic cancer. When symptoms looked like ordinary aging until a stage four diagnosis changed everything, Carol found herself balancing love, urgency, and the painful truth that an adult parent can still refuse help.
We talk honestly about the day-to-day stress of family caregiving: the “push or pause” decisions, the discomfort of advocating to medical professionals when your loved one says “I’m fine,” and what it feels like to manage updates, appointments, and end-of-life care while trying not to lose the relationship. Carol also reflects on palliative care and hospice care, how resistance can tie a caregiver’s hands, and why having a knowledgeable support team can make the difference between panic and steadiness.
Faith is woven through the whole journey, especially when spiritual routines collapse under exhaustion. Carol shares how Lamentations became a lifeline for grief, and we explore the reality of dying that movies rarely show, plus the healing that can come from hospice education and grief counseling after loss. If you’re walking through caregiver stress, anticipatory grief, or the guilt that sometimes follows death, you’ll find language, perspective, and hope here. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review telling us what part of caregiving you’re in right now.
You can love your family and still feel crushed when no one shows up to help. When you are the one making the calls, managing the appointments, handling the emergencies, and carrying the emotional load, loneliness can turn into resentment fast. We name that pain without shame, because those feelings are human and common for family caregivers, especially when siblings stay silent or relatives assume you can handle everything.
We also get honest about the hidden cost: resentment promises relief, but it drains your strength, colors your relationships, and makes caregiving even heavier. From a Christian caregiving perspective, we turn toward the God who sees, anchoring hope in Scripture and in the reminder that your worth is not measured by how much you do or how well you hold it together.
Then we get practical. I share a reframing tool that changes the tone of support: asking for help as an invitation to something meaningful. You will hear clear examples you can use right away, plus simple strategies for processing emotions, journaling, building a wider support system, communicating specific needs, and setting boundaries that protect your health. We close with a call to forgiveness that releases resentment’s grip and helps you keep moving forward with peace and purpose.
If you know a caregiver who feels unseen, share this episode, subscribe for more encouragement, and leave a review so more family caregivers can find hope and real help.
Caregiving rarely color‑codes itself on our calendars. One day you’re navigating an adoption that looks nothing like the tidy plans you imagined; the next day, you’re juggling a teen’s complex needs alongside aging parents in the hospital. Mandy Horne, a registered nurse and board‑certified health and wellness nurse coach, joins me to share how a late autism diagnosis reframed years of confusion, opened doors to therapies, and restored hope for her family.
We talk about the difference a diagnosis can make—not as a label to hide behind, but as a key to access care, educate a village, and reset expectations. Mandy shares the hard parts without flinching: sleepless nights, aggressive moments where her husband shouldered the physical load, and the invisible cost of running on empty. Then we trace the surprising arc of her son’s senior year, where supervised medication changes and a clear call toward ministry sparked a transformation. His YouTube and TikTok outreach is growing fast, and together they’ve launched “Jesus and Autism,” a candid space for families hungry for encouragement and truth.
Threaded through every chapter is a simple practice: surrender beats striving. We trade perfection for flexible habits—micro‑devotions, worship on the go, and five‑minute breath prayers that fit real life. We explore how to build a supportive church community, why “savor the ordinary day” is a lifeline, and how grace for yourself can be the pivot that keeps a home steady. If you’ve felt sandwiched between generations, if you’re waiting on clarity, or if you need language to explain what your family carries, this story offers both practical steps and a steadying peace.
Listen now, share this with a caregiver who needs it, and leave a review to help others find hope in their own season of caring. Subscribe for more stories, tools, and faith‑filled support.
Leaning Into Love and Respite for Compassion Fatigue
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her interview last week with Dr. Ed Smink (Episode 137). Dr. Ed shared his personal experience with burnout and how important it is to be aware of compassion fatigue. Rayna continues the conversation with tips on how leaning into love and respite can help overcome this condition for family caregivers:
[1:06] Compassion fatigue is described as a condition characterized by emotional and physical exhaustion, leading to a diminished ability to empathize or feel compassion for others.
[6:27] What would happen if you wrapped him in a hug and told him you loved him
[9:00] Leaning into love is one of the things you can do when you begin to focus on the task more than the person.
[11:40] Finding respite at home:
[11:47] Identify roadblocks.
[12:36] Ask for help.
[13:42] Brainstorm ideas.
[14:32] Do it!
[15:01] True compassion fatigue will take more than a little respite, but start small and explore what you can do to re-energize.
[15:45] This episode is brought to you by the Encouragement Series, a special gift coming in November. Visit www.EncouragementSeries.com to sign up to learn more about this faith-based series that will offer you hope in this difficult season.
Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Dr. Edward M. Smink, Ph.D. Dr. Ed is a speaker, coach, and author of The Soul of Caregiving: A Caregiver’s Guide to Healing and Transformation. He holds multiple degrees including two M.A.s and a Ph. D in Psychology. In addition, Dr. Ed holds a title as a Board Certified Chaplain and an Associate Coach. He attributes his skills to his experience at the bedside as well as to overcoming severe compassion fatigue and burnout. Dr. Ed offers hope now to caregivers suffering from similar issues. He provides the following insights:
(3:34) Often times caregivers feel guilty when they ask for help.
(6:33) Compassion Fatigue is not a mental illness, but instead something we all experience when we care to the point of exhaustion.
(10:23) Three cultural taboos that prevent caregivers from seeking help:
(10:26) If you just keep trying harder, you can get it done.
(11:23) Don’t talk to anyone about your experiences.
(12:35) Don’t show emotion.
(16:40) Compassion Resilience means you are able to absorb a situation and not have it take you off-balance.
(20:18) It is important to be able to find the boundary to take on what you need to, but allow the rest to come off.
(22:38) Self-care is the ability to reflect and take care of yourself.
(25:04) Contact Dr. Ed at his website soulofcaregiving.com and order his book there or on Amazon.
(25:33) When you find yourself overwhelmed, do the easiest thing.
(27:11) This episode is brought to you by the Encouragement Series: Hope Over Regrets. This free faith-based series will be coming in November. If you would like to receive updates, visit EncouragementSeries.com.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her interview last week with Deb Kelsey-Davis (Episode 125). Deb shared how technology impacted her caregiving season and helped her with self-care. Rayna continues the conversation with tips on how creating routines can be a helpful tool for caregivers. In addition, she explores how faith can impact caregiving:
[1:00] The key to self-care is that it is not a one-time event but instead an ongoing routine or habit.
[2:25] When we make time for things we love and schedule in fun, we have a happier life overall.
[4:13] Think about the routines you have in place and then add to them.
[6:00] Using a habit tracker can help you add healthy habits into your life and it will help with consistency.
[7:25] Give yourself grace as you can always start again tomorrow.
[9:00] Nourish for Caregivers (www.nourishforcaregivers.com) provides an effective faith-based program to minister to the practical, emotional, and spiritual needs of caregivers.
[10:20] Caregivers are invited to attend the weekly support group, House Calls, every Tuesday at 10:00 AM CST via Zoom. Join at: House Calls Registration.
[13:13] Spirituality can provide relief from the endless routines of caregiving and also life-changing crises.
[14:16] Make sure that you continue to include the faith journey in your caregiving.
[17:21] Consider the person you are caring for and their spiritual growth.
[19:00] This episode is brought to you by the Encouragement Series: Hope Over Regrets. Visit www.EncouragementSeries.com for more details.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Deb Kelsey-Davis. Deb is the Co-Founder of Sagacity.care, Co-Founder of Nourish for Caregivers, a clinician, speaker, and bestselling author. Her passion is supporting caregivers with practical, emotional, and spiritual resources necessary to maintain their financial, mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. She draws on her experience of over 40 years in healthcare and her personal experience caring for her aging parents. She provides the following support:
(3:06) Remote caregiving is not lesser of a job and it can be done.
(7:23) ) Sagacity.care is an app that can help caregivers organize and store important pieces of information.
(9:33) Technology can help fill in the gaps.
(13:08) Step one is to identify and create your Care Circle.
(13:35) The second is to get organized.
(14:00) Then, connect with others in the group.
(14:19) The last piece is to share.
(17:23) One self-care habit that helps Deb the most is starting the day with a cup of coffee, her Bible app, and prayer.
(18:48) This episode was brought to you by the 5-Day Self-Care Challenge. This really simple 5-Day Challenge will help you consider your self-care (Sept. 19-24) Sign up at aseasonofcaring.com/selfcarechallenge
Benefits of Pity Parties and Understanding the Dying Process
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her interview last week with Betsy Wurzel Sloan who was a caregiver for her husband who had Early Onset Alzheimer’s. Betsy shared her experiences with her caregiving journey and explained that she gave herself permission to have Pity Parties. She also talked about the dying process. Rayna shares more on both important subjects:
[1:30] Pity Parties are helpful and provide the opportunity to vent your feelings.
[2:18] Self-Pity can lead to Self-Compassion.
[3:40] There are many euphemisms for death and dying.
[6:34] When you hear some of the key phrases, ask for an explanation and more questions.
[7:15] The process of dying happens over an extended period.
[11:25] One to three months before death, there are both emotional and physical changes.
[12:37] One to two weeks before, things move faster.
[13:37] Hospice can offer comfort through the dying process with medications for air hunger, pain, and anxiety.
[15:42] Many physical changes happen in the final weeks of life.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Betsy Wurzel Sloan. Betsy is a retired nurse and teacher’s aide who now has her own talk show. She is the caregiver for her special needs adult son, and she has helped her mother-in-law, father, and husband as they experienced Alzheimer’s. Through the journey with her husband, Betsy feels that she found her gifts, power, and voice. She now works to raise awareness of Early Onset Alzheimer’s with her mission to help no one walk the journey alone during caregiving or after. Betsy provides the following insights:
(5:00) Live your life and enjoy it while taking your loved one out as much as possible.
(5:41) It can be easy to sit in a heap and feel sorry for yourself, but that is not going to do you or anyone else any good.
(7:11) With Alzheimer’s, know that today is the best day you have, so go ahead and take advantage of that.
(9:26) Self-care is not an option.
(12:59) We need to validate and acknowledge our feelings and have a ‘pity party.’
(14:19) Remember that it does not matter what other people think.
(16:55) Knowledge is power.
(18:25) You know your loved one so go with your gut instinct.
(21:19) We all need to learn about the dying process.
(25:13) Find Betsy’s show, ‘Chatting with Betsy’ on Spotify, Streaker, Apple, Pod Chasers, and join her Facebook group #KickAlzheimersAssMovement | Facebook
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, shares two important tools to help caregivers manage the stress that can be experienced while caring for a loved one. She shares examples and insight on reframing and “Both/And” Thinking:
[2:21] When we frame our experience with good in mind, it is easier to see the good
[4:26] Reframing helps you to see all of the picture, not just one little part.
[5:15] Take a deep breath and notice if ‘your camera is zoomed in’ or your perspective is distorted.
[5:39] Reframing will help you strengthen your mental resolve.
[6:36] “Both/And” Thinking vs. “Either/Or” Thinking
[7:50] Unlike compromise which requires giving up something to agree, “Both/And” Thinking let’s both exist together.
[10:34] “Both/And” Thinking creates breathing room and helps you to appreciate what you have lost and to appreciate what you have now.
This episode has been brought to you by No Regrets: Hope for Your Caregiving Season. Purchase your signed copy and special bundle by visiting www.NoRegrets-book.com. Once you have read it, please consider leaving a review at any major retailer or Goodreads.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Susanne White. Susanne was able to care for her parents and venture out on a caregiving journey that would change her life. She is now a blogger and author of the book, ‘Self Care for Caregivers’ which will be released in early September. Susanne shares her experience, strength, and hope with others so that they can survive caregiving with grace and empowerment. She provides the following insights:
(5:07) When caregiving, if you are trying to control or manipulate, your loved one will know that.
(7:11) Being more self-aware can help manage the fear.
(9:02) Caregivers cannot fix it all but can help it be as good as possible.
(12:00) Ask, ‘Do you want to be right?’ or ‘Do you want to be happy?’
(15:00) Just like warriors, caregivers fight each day for their loved ones.
(17:13) Not being consulted or included in the conversation can be annoying for the person being cared for.
(19:32) Take a few moments to look for the blessings.
(20:00) Get your copy of Susanne’s book containing 140 hacks for caregivers on her website, www.caregiverwarrior.com, or at all major retailers starting September 6th.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her interview from last week with Pastor Rick Craig (Episode 129) and the discussion related to end-of-life preparations. In his book, When It’s Time: End-of-Life Planning at Any Age: Make it Part of Your Legacy. Rayna shares more information on dealing with these tough issues related to end-of-life preparations:
[2:09] Know the difference between palliative care vs. hospice and that things have changed over the past 20 years.
[3:30] Understanding that palliative care might be an option for your loved one can be helpful.
[4:00] Make sure wills are finalized, and that Advanced Directives and Do Not Resuscitate Orders are in place.
[4:37] Find helpful information at www.nia.nih.gov about making decisions for someone else at end-of-life.
[6:30] ‘Substituted Judgement’ and ‘Best Interests’ are two ways of helping to make decisions that you do not have black and white information about.
[9:23] Ask specific questions that help you examine all the options.
This episode has been brought to you by No Regrets: Hope for Your Caregiving Season. You can find it at all major book retailers and once you have read it, please consider leaving a review.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Rick Craig. Rick is an experienced caregiver, author, and ordained pastor. He felt led to share his personal and professional experiences to help others navigate the journey of planning for end-of-life. In his book, When It’s Time, Rick walks through 13 end-of-life realities that surviving family members will encounter. He helps others see that a well-thought-out plan can be one of the best gifts. Rick shares the following insights:
(5:00) End-of-life planning is a subject very few people know anything about, and they don’t even know where to start.
(5:57) Pre-need is planning ahead of time and At-need means that death has occurred, so the approach to the conversation is different based on the timing.
(7:00) When a plan is provided ahead of time, the family has a map in their hands and when there isn’t one, the family is left saying, “What do I do now?”
(7:35) End-of-life planning is for any age.
(9:00) Plans have to be maintained and updated regularly.
(12:00) It is especially important to plan when you start having a family and start accumulating assets.
(15:41) Just take a little piece and start there.
(16:38) Connect with Rick at his website, www.whenitstime.org and find his book on Amazon or Barns and Noble.
Life Continues; Love Expands; Hope Holds: Stories of Hope with Pat Burkett
A small change in behavior can rewrite a life. When Pat began noticing Don’s unusual decisions, lost words, and shifting patterns, the search for answers led to a Frontotemporal Dementia diagnosis—and a decade-long lesson in love, agency, and faith. We unpack the realities of FTD’s behavioral variant, why it’s often misread in midlife, and how a caregiver’s voice can and should shape care. Pat explains how she learned to opt out of stressful, unhelpful appointments, advocate through atypical medication reactions, and build routines that gave Don dignity. Sometimes the right choice is the one that brings peace, even if it looks different from the standard path.
We also go straight at the grief most caregivers carry but rarely name. Loss begins long before the goodbye. Pat shares how stacked losses overwhelmed her plans and how therapy—and for a season, an antidepressant—helped her function, feel, and keep going. Faith remained a steady thread, from a midnight caregiver post that prepared her for Don’s sudden seizures to the quiet conviction that help would meet her at the moment of need. Along the way, we talk about practical strategies: protecting the caregiver’s health, choosing physicians who see the whole family, and honoring routines that soothe, like Don’s daily mowing that brought calm even on hospice.
The heart of this conversation is freedom from guilt. You can’t alter the disease’s destination, but you can shape the journey. Pat closes with hard-won wisdom on accepting help, inviting community into the home, and measuring success by presence and kindness rather than outcomes. And she offers a hopeful coda: life continues, love expands, and gratitude can return. Listen for validation, guidance, and a gentle nudge toward living without regrets.
If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a caregiver who needs hope, and leave a review to help others find these stories.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her interviews from the past few weeks with women who are Cancer Thrivers. Following these conversations, she began to think about and investigate what those in a season of needing care might want caregivers to know. Rayna shares the following ideas of support for those being cared for:
[1:14] Educate yourself
[4:27] Help preserve dignity and privacy
[6:21] Treat them as a valuable person
[7:12] Honor their choices
[9:31] Offer help in specific ways. Avoid saying, “Let me know if you need anything.”
[12:29] Just be with them and spend time with them
[15:19] Let them have a bad day
[18:05] Gratitude is a very powerful tool that can help impact you in ways that you do not even realize. Sign up to be a part of the Gratitude Challenge at www.aseasonofcaring.com/gratitude
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Talaya Dendy. Talaya has developed a fulfilling career path from cancer patient to founder and CEO of On the Other Side, LLC. She started the cancer navigation enterprise that provides personalized support using a patient-centered and holistic approach after all of her learnings from her cancer journey. Talaya is also the host of The Navigating Cancer Together Podcast and an authority in the interview series, I Survived Cancer and Here is How I Did. She shares the following insights:
(6:15) Helping to take care of your loved ones is truly helping them to heal.
(10:07) Threats of some type can help us to ask what is important and how to live to our calling and purpose.
(11:00) Having that person who has been through something similar is key.
(12:25) A doula is someone who supports another person through a major life change and a significant health-related experience.
(16:05) Having the support of a doula can help the person worry less and that lightens the load.
(18:29) A doula can help everyone from feeling isolated by getting everything out in the open and bringing everyone together.
(19:58) Connect with Talaya at her website www.OnTheOtherSide.Life or email her at Talaya@ontheotherside.life.
(21:03) This episode is brought to you by The Gratitude Challenge. Sign up now at www.aseasonofcaring.com/gratitude.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her interview from last week with Heather Carter (Episode 125). Heather is a cancer survivor and she shared tips from her season of being cared for. She reminded us that our mindset and attitude have a significant impact on those we are caring for. Rayna shares additional information on this aspect of caregiving and how gratitude can help:
[6:23] True gratitude is to focus on what you have in the moment.
[8:00] Make gratitude a part of your daily or weekly routine.
[10:19] Just saying Thank You can be helpful.
[10:53] Finding the method that works best for you is the most effective approach.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Heather Carter. In 2015, Heather was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia. During her hospitalization and illness, she began updating people on her status via blogging. Heather shared her fears, struggles, inspiration, and spiritual observations. Eventually, she was able to find ways to be grateful for what the disease triggered in her and the blog went from updating people on the health and healing of her body to reflecting on the health and healing of her soul. Heather writes about cancer, addiction, and diseases of the soul like worry, fear, control, comparison, and resentment. Two books have come from her blog, Soul Selfie, and Soul Selfie: #nofilter. She shares the following about her season of being cared for:
(3:45) How others react does affect the health as well as the spiritual and emotional wellbeing of the person who is sick.
(4:03) Remember to just be with the person you are caring for.
(5:25) Treat the person regularly and do regular life stuff.
(6:30) Ask them what they want and need.
(9:16) It is okay to show that you are sad and that you feel sad for the person who is ill.
(11:30) You have to stay in good mental, spiritual, and physical health, or you will not be able to continue to care for the person.
(12:04) Support from a community is critical for the caregiver and the one being cared for.
(21:44) Find Heather’s blog posts (sorts available by topic) and links to purchase her books on her website www.heathercarterwrites.com.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her conversation from last week with Marie Vaudry (Episode 123). Marie is the founder of Gleam in Your Eye, an activity subscription box created for those with dementia. Rayna shares additional information on ways to stay active and engaged no matter your age:
[2:24] Brain games can help your brain stay healthier and younger longer.
[4:33] Brain function includes memory, problem-solving, and critical thinking.
[5:20] Stimulate your brain in different ways by using your imagination.
[6:14] Stimulate different areas of your brain by using your senses or your non-dominant hand.
[7:05] Reading is a great way to build your brain power.
[8:00] Check out udemy.com for online courses to learn something new.
[11:16] Volunteering together can expand your normal activities and keep your brain sharp and healthy.
[11:49] Combining cognitive training with regular exercise, a healthy diet, adequate sleep, and socialization provide the most benefit.
[12:14] Staying physically active helps boost mood and keeps the doctor away.
[13:14] Stretching helps you get loose and ready for the day and can help you sleep better.
[14:00] Consider adding yoga or chair yoga to your routine.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Marie Vaudry. Marie is a wife, mother, and daughter to France who was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s in 2012. France loved to spend hours doing crossword puzzles and reading books however as her illness progressed, these tasks became more difficult. It became challenging for the family to find stimulating activities adapted to her changing cognitive abilities. As a result, Marie researched and created Spark Your Mind, a book of activities adapted for patients at a moderate stage of the disease. But, she didn’t stop there. In 2021, Marie set out to create a more comprehensive experience that includes logical activities while also addressing the sensory and physical needs of the patient. She founded Gleam in Your Eye offering a monthly subscription box filled with fun and stimulating activities that make life easier for caregivers. Marie shares the following insights:
(4:00) The more you do with your loved ones, the more you maintain their abilities
(5:00) When you engage in activities your loved one is interested in, you have fun and create memories.
(7:30) Our loved ones need us to be there with them, to make sure they are comfortable and secure, and to have fun.
(14:43) Try different kinds of activities and maybe they will have fun and they will succeed.
(15:30) As a caregiver, if you can bring joy for 30 minutes or one hour into your house, you will see it makes a big difference.
(18:43) For more information or to order, visit www.gleaminyoureye.com or connect on Facebook, LinkedIn, or Instagram @ Gleam in Your Eye.
Experienced Caregiver Tips for Navigating Moods and Behavior Changes
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, is joined today by co-host, Carlos Olivas III. Carlos is the primary caregiver for his father who is journeying with Alzheimer’s. Together Rayna and Carlos discuss challenges with changes in behavior and mood as the disease progresses. They share additional information to assist caregivers to handle situations:
[3:22] It does not matter if your loved one knows your name. They know that you are someone significant in their life.
[7:31] Time away helps tremendously to then come back, be present, and have an attitude of compassion.
[8:42] We want to do it with them, not to them.
[9:34] Recognize triggers.
[15:00] Step into their world and see what they are feeling.
[17:22] Try having multiples of an item to avoid anxiety.
[18:24] We need to understand their agenda and support them in that.
[18:40] Pain can be an underlying factor in mood.
[21:17] Sometimes we all have moods and that is okay.
[22:06] Routines can help both caregivers and their loved ones.
[26:20] We need to adapt to find workarounds for barriers.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Elizabeth Landsverk, MD. Dr. Liz trained at Harvard and has been a geriatrician for over 20 years. She served as Assistant Professor of Medicine at USC and was a consultant to the Elder Abuse Forensic Center in San Francisco. She shares her experiences in a newly released book, ‘Living in the Moment: A Guide to Overcoming Challenges and Finding Moments of Joy in Alzheimer’s Disease and Other Dementias’. Dr. Liz shares the following insights:
(2:00) First challenges are when someone’s behaviors start to change regardless of their age.
(3:04) Quick tests to determine if more evaluation is needed:
Draw a clock showing 10 minutes after 11:00
Calculate 25% of $22.50
(4:15) Every county will have a Division on Aging and can direct you to resources.
(8:00) Find a place where the staff is doing activities with them and they look like they enjoy being there.
(9:16) You should not use medication for someone bored or not sleeping, but there are cases when it is needed to take the angry edge off.
(11:05) The top two treatments for agitation are Tylenol and ice cream.
(14:53) To find a geriatric doctor, look for medical schools with memory/geriatrics clinic or the VA.
(17:08) Liz’s book provides a step-by-step guide from diagnosis to the end and is available on Amazon.com.
(19:10) We need to help families figure out how they are going to pay for support.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topic of meals and feeding your aging loved one from last week’s interview (119) with Toni Fisk. Rayna shares some tips and tricks from her caregiving season with her father around mealtime planning and execution:
[4:00] A Meal Card System can help you shop for what is needed. It can also include everything for the meal and how to prepare it. (i.e., what condiments to add to the hot dog)
[6:00] Please take advantage of the free download available.
[7:00] Recording what and how much was eaten allows for changes to be made when tastes change and also to rotate meals to provide a well-balanced diet.
[8:00] Check out Cook For Your Life with Fred Hutch.
[9:16] Freezer meals can be a good option.
[13:39] Consider grocery delivery to help keep up on that task.
[15:13] Consider dignity bibs (DinnerWear Dining Scarves from Toni Fisk). They are beautiful and help keep your loved one’s clothes from being stained, make clean-up easy, and help to keep their dignity.
[16:31] Use the Hand Under Hand technique by Teepa Snow to help with feeding.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Toni Fisk. Toni has been in the food and hospitality industry for over 35 years and is now an author. She is also a professional speaker with multiple dementia certifications as an educator and trainer working with professional care partners and family members. As a Certified Dietary Manager and a Senior Living Dining Operations Consultant, she has a deep commitment to education and enlightenment in the care of persons living with dementia. Toni shares the following insights:
(5:13) If you engage the person and have them participate in the menu selections, it makes for a happier person.
(6:00) They want something that tastes great, has a nice texture, the hot food is hot and the cold food is cold, and it is served on time.
(8:10) Part of working with our elderly is understanding them, their roots, and their upbringing.
(10:00) Regardless of the presentation (pureed, soft, ground, fine dice), we can still have flavorful food.
(14:00) People need to change their mindsets about how they interact and behave with people living with dementia.
(15:14) Check the environment:
A wheelchair should go underneath the table
Check the placement of plates and bowls
Notice any tremors
Utilize nice clothing protectors
Keep the volume on tv and radio down
Reduce idle chit chat
(19:00) Need to make mealtime a successful activity for them to eat.
(21:52) Toni’s book, Dining with Dignity: Unlocking the Mystery of Dementia and Dining, is available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. You can contact Toni directly through her website at www.dinnerwearhc.info
(23:15) No Regrets: Hope for Your Caregiving Season is turning 1! A walkthrough is starting on June 6th. There is still time to sign up at www.aseasonofcaring.com
Finding Dignity and Grace in Caregiving Decisions: Stories of Hope with Catherine Fitzhugh
Caregiving rarely unfolds the way we imagine. Catherine joins us to trace a decades-long journey that started in childhood waiting rooms and led to the moment her father was diagnosed with Huntington’s at 80, long after her mother’s dementia and medical challenges had reshaped daily life. What follows is a candid, hope-filled guide to planning one step ahead, inviting family into specific roles, and choosing dignity over control when everything changes faster than your systems can keep up.
We dig into the hard transitions—selling homes, moving parents in, and turning a new house into a familiar haven with small details that calm the nervous system. Catherine shares how “hire for fit, not ability” became a lifeline: the right caregiver isn’t just technically skilled, they connect, ask better questions, bring humor, and meet emotional needs that checklists miss. From entering the world of dementia instead of correcting it, to medication strategies like adding one drug at a time and tracking side effects, you’ll hear practical tactics you can apply today. We also talk about finances with compassion: transition access early, preserve reassuring rituals, and keep dignity at the core.
Family dynamics get real here. Catherine explains how she “threw away the scale” of who did most, invited relatives into clear roles they could sustain, and let go of bitterness when help didn’t show. Woven through is a steady rhythm of faith—listening, being known, and following the next right step—that turns midnight crises into moments of presence and care. If you’re navigating aging parents, juggling distance, or staring down another unexpected change, this conversation offers grounded wisdom, gentle humor, and tools you can trust.
If this resonates, follow the show, share it with someone who needs encouragement, and leave a review to help other caregivers find these stories and strategies.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topic of being a conscious caregiver from Tears in My Gumbo and last week’s interview (117) with Nadine Roberts Cornish. Rayna explores more with the five steps that can help caregivers to move away from being on autopilot:
[0:39] Five Steps to Conscious Caregiving:
Step 1: Helplessness
Step 2: Recognition
Step 3: Process
Step 4: Acceptance
Step 5: Surrender
[2:00] When processing through these steps, they can be cyclical.
[11:00] Caregiving is a complex process and it is important to find advocates who are working with you on behalf of your loved one.
[11:14] Helplessness is typical and will come and go throughout your caregiving season.
[11:45] Process is putting the puzzle pieces together to gather the needed resources.
[12:00] Acceptance is where you are and this is what is happening.
[12:15] These steps are similar to the steps of grief.
[13:00] When stuck in helplessness, recognition will lead you to process which can hep you find what is needed to continue through the season.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Nadine Roberts Cornish. Nadine is a Certified Senior Advisor, Gerontologist, author, and national speaker. She is also the founder of The Caregiver’s Guardian (TCG) which was created from her personal experience caring for her mother. TCG provides coaching and consultation services to family caregivers across the country. In addition, TCG now offers a new program for businesses and organizations. Nadine is working on the latest addition to her multi-book series, Caregiver’s Gumbo. She shares the following insights:
(10:49) Do not keep what you are going through and what you are experiencing to yourself as your message is important for someone else.
(11:27) Like gumbo, caregiving has lots of messy parts which vary from family to family and takes a long time to come together to make a unique taste.
(12:00) Caregiving is a whole lot better if you have other people supporting you in the process.
(18:56) Being a caregiver is one of the most transformative processes that we have in our lifetime.
(21:40) Five steps to conscious caregiving:
Helplessness
Recognition
Process
Acceptance
Surrender
(24:00) The progression of the Five Steps is cyclical and not linear.
(27:00) Connect with Nadine at TCGCares.com or by phone at 303-394-1963.
Caregiverhood: Things to Think About and Celebrate
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topic of celebrating the season of caring for a senior adult from last week’s interview (115) with Jenn Chan. Rayna continues with that theme and looks at how this can help caregivers. [1:47] There is so much involved in making the milestone decision to become a family caregiver. [3:00] Four areas to think about:
[3:20] Do this season the way that works best for you and your family . . . Give yourself permission to find what works for you.
[5:41] Self-care . . . Be kind to your future self.
[7:43] Grief . . . The feeling when things are not what we thought they would be.
[11:05] Resources . . . Take on the label to open the door.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Jenn Chan. Jenn is a CEO, certified senior advisor, certified caregiving consultant, and a support group facilitator. Inspired by caregiving for her grandmother, Jenn has dedicated her career to elevating the family caregiver role with fun, love, and positivity. She believes caregiving is a lifestyle and that becoming a senior caregiver is a life milestone worth celebrating. Jenn shares the following insights:
(4:26) A digital detox, where you unplug from all electronics, is a great self-care tip.
(7:00) Self-care can be just checking in with yourself emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually.
(8:54) Understanding the caregiver identity and embracing the caregiver term opens up a door to resources, workshops, support groups, books, conferences, podcasts, and so much more.
(11:59) The Senior Shower Project is a way to celebrate family caregivers with a party at the beginning of the journey.
(14:05) People attending the Senior Shower identify with the new caregiver, show their support, and celebrate.
(18:03) The celebration can open doors to bring resources to the caregiver to grow their care team.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topic of learning from others from last week’s interview (113) with Jean Lee. Jean is an author and co-founder of AlzAuthors.com whose mission is to provide resources to light the way for those on the Alzheimer’s/dementia journey. They spotlight authors who share their personal journeys so that others can benefit. This week, Rayna continues with that theme and looks at reading and how it can help caregivers.
[0:43] Books allow those who have been before us to communicate their experiences, and we can glean from that on our own time.
[1:00] Think about how you can carve out a little bit of time to become more of a reader.
[1:20] A couple of book recommendations from caregivers:
Say It Now: 33 Ways to Say I Love You to the Most Important People in Your Life, by Sherry Richert Belul
Emotions: An Owner’s Manual: Harness the Power of Your Greatest Personal Resource for Life and Work by Joey Sheldon
[6:00] Embrace reading not only to learn but to escape.
[7:00] Benefits to reading every day:
Mental stimulation for your brain
Stress reduction
Improve sleep
Enhancement of knowledge
Expand your vocabulary
Build stronger analytical skills
Improve focus and concentration
Free source of entertainment by utilizing the library
[14:19] Reading out loud to your loved ones can help them too.
[15:56] If you are not currently a reader, find something you would enjoy reading and go from there.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Jean Lee. Jean was working full-time as a teacher when both of her parents were diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Her first book, Alzheimer’s Daughter, is a memoir of her journey balancing her teaching responsibilities with her caregiving journey. Through her writing experience, she connected with other authors of Alzheimer’s books and co-founded AlzAuthors.com. After seven years, the group is over 300 voices strong sharing personal experiences of their caregiving journey. Jean shares the following insights and information about the support available:
(1:53) Keeping a journal can help you talk about specifics and the frequency of behaviors. It can also help at doctor’s visits and show a progression of the disease.
(4:11) Reading books about similar experiences can help you realize that you can survive the journey.
(14:00) When reading about others’ journeys, although none of it is identical, we gain compassion for what somebody else is going through. The stories and books can also help light the way through your dark journey.
(16:03) AlzAuthors books are all written from personal experience/have a personal twist:
Memoirs
Caregiver guides
Fiction
Children and Teens
Poetry
Quick Reads
Art
(22:26) AlzAuthors shares blogs offering support in the now.
(23:09) AlzAuthors has added a podcast, Untangling Alzheimer’s, so people can listen on the go.
(25:43) Visit AlzAuthors.com to find the podcast, blog posts, and links to purchase books.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, discusses support groups, what might be keeping you from being a part, what to expect and various kinds of groups.
[1:48] What could be holding you back from joining a support group:
[2:10] Feeling that you will be put on the spot and must share your story
[3:00] Feeling uncertain regarding what you would share about your loved one and concerned that others will be critical
[4:00] Thought that you would feel depressed or sad hearing other’s stories
[5:19] Not knowing what to expect
[6:00] When choosing a support group, it is important to find a good fit.
[6:32] Groups should have a structure they follow.
[8:16] Why attend?
[9:16] Reduce isolation
[10:00] Relieve stress
[10:35] Gain education
[11:26] Become more balanced
[14:15] Friendships
[15:09] Different kinds of groups
Peer-Peer or Mutual
Association Groups
In-Person
Online
Facebook
[16:17] Try out the group to be sure it is a good fit. If it is not, do not be afraid to leave it and try a different one.
[16:43] Visit aseasonofcaring.com and find out more about Rayna’s free monthly support group or Nourish for Caregiver's faith-based weekly support group.
[17:17] In June, join her book study via her Facebook group to find support through her book, No Regrets: Hope for Your Caregiving Season.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, speaks with Mike and Kim Barnes. While balancing their lives as spouses and parents with their successful TV/journalism careers, they have also been caring for their aging parents. It is through these experiences that they have found a passion to help others who are on this caring journey. People want to be part of a community, and Mike and Kim are dedicating their time to helping provide that opportunity. They share the following insights:
(6:26) Each person is different, and every person’s needs are different.
(8:32) Figure out how to prioritize and not let things slip through the cracks.
(9:06) Being open with your children allows them to see what they will face as they get older and eventually care for you. In addition, it builds empathy.
(10:28) Caregiving is an additional job that you have to make room for.
(11:22) You are on an emotional roller-coaster and you cannot take everything personally.
(16:00) Check to see if in the big scheme of things, does this matter?
(20:15) Having a community to be a sounding board, to vent to, or ask questions helps.
(30:37) When discussing Power of Attorney or a will with your parents, explain that it is a gift to loved ones.
(35:01) To find interviews with experts on a variety of topics, visit Mike and Kim’s website at www.parentingagingparents.com. To join their support group, click the button on the home page and request to join their Facebook group. You can also subscribe to receive their weekly newsletter.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topics covered during last week’s interview (109) with Erin Galyean. Rayna shares some additional thoughts based on Erin’s role as the VP of Communications during her caring season with her sister, Megan. In addition, Rayna provides support ideas for communication tools and building a caregiving team.
It is important to have someone who can be the communication connection between your loved one and all those who care about them and the family.
Resources to help families and care teams with communication and coordinating care:
Family caregivers generally take on too much of the responsibility themselves.
Build a caregiving team to not only help you out but to help your loved one get used to receiving support from others. Examples:
Grocery shopping
Lawn maintenance
Cleaning
Laundry
Meal preparations/Cooking
Understand personalities and strengths when building a care team. Check out the free quiz at www.caringquiz.com to see what your caregiving personality is and help you build a balanced care team.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Erin Galyean. Erin is an author, speaker, and sales trainer. From her professional experience, combined with losing her father and sister, she has become a patient advocate and wants to share her knowledge with others so they can do the same. Erin provides the following insights:
Without a caregiving team, you are robbing others of the opportunity to help, serve, love, and bring their gifts and talents to the table.
Distance caregiving is just as important.
Offer to serve in the role of VP of Communications or Meal Train Coordinator.
Do not be afraid to ask questions. Write them down and make them open-ended.
Ask if conversations with doctors can be recorded.
Everyone needs a notebook!
Create a strong morning routine that includes self-care.
Get in touch with Erin at www.badassadvocate.com and find her books, ‘Badass Advocate: Becoming the Champion Your Seriously Ill Loved One Deserves” and “My Badass Advocate Journal” on Amazon or Barnes and Noble.
From Closet Floor Prayers to a Waymaker Testimony: Stories of Hope with Shelli Strickland
What happens when the child you love suddenly can’t face the day—and the usual fixes don’t work? We open up about a mother’s unseen caregiving: guiding her son through anxiety and depression after a cross-country move collided with the uncertainty of COVID. The story moves beyond clichés, touching the raw places—shame when friends don’t understand, judgment from well-meaning people, and the weary loop of doing “all the right things” without a breakthrough—until a quiet yes to counseling, community, and a carefully chosen low-dose medication turned the tide.
We talk candidly about how faith and mental health care can work together, not against each other. You’ll hear what it looks like to advocate at school, track real progress, and hold steady when improvement comes in fits and starts. The spiritual arc is honest and personal: praying on the closet floor, realizing God loves the caregiver as much as the child, and releasing control with the words, “I’m writing his testimony—stop trying to steal the pen.” Along the way, small markers of hope begin to shine: a safe church home, notes from attentive teachers, an eighth-grade tribute to kindness, and a seventh-grade “Waymaker” testimony that reframed the pain with purpose.
If you’re navigating child anxiety, caregiver burnout, or the gray space between prayer and practical help, this conversation offers tools and comfort: how to discern when chemistry is part of the problem, why persistence in seeking support matters, and how a simple nightly gratitude practice can re-anchor a family. We also share Shelli’s upcoming Bible study, “Rise: How to Get Back Up After Life Knocks You Down,” built on Ezra 10:4 and designed to help you take the next faithful step from the valley to solid ground.
If this spoke to you, follow the show, share it with someone who needs hope today, and leave a review so others can find these stories of quiet, steady resilience.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topics covered during last week’s interview (107) with Nancy Poland. Rayna shares some additional learnings from Nancy’s second book, Remarkable Caregiving, where she interviewed six family caregivers and told their stories. In addition, Rayna provides supporting data that family caregivers are not alone.
Caregivers can get their strength from and learn from the person for whom they are caring.
When you are only focused on the things to do, you miss the relationship.
If you do not have or do not know your “Why”, it is time to figure it out.
Some statistics provided in 2020:
Approximately 53 million Americans were providing unpaid care for relatives or friends.
The average age of caregivers was 49.3 years old, showing that it is not only spouses caring for one another later in life.
Over half, 61% of caregivers, are employed in addition to caregiving.
The average age of those being cared for is 68.9 years old.
A large percentage, 89% of the care recipients, are related to their caregivers by blood or marriage.
Family caregivers offer an average of 23.7 hours per week and even more if the person they care for lives with them.
Let Rayna know what you need from her and in future podcasts. She wants to offer hope and would love to hear from you. Visit www.aseasonofcaring.com/podcast and click on the microphone to leave her a voicemail.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Nancy Poland. Nancy is a writer and speaker who focuses on caregiving. She gained her experience as a family caregiver by caring for her father with Lewy Body Dementia. Nancy is the author of two books and provides a monthly newsletter, “Caring for the Caregiver,” and free resources on her website. She is a speaker, trainer, wife, mother, volunteer, and contract and compliance manager. Nancy shares the following insights based on her firsthand caregiving experiences:
Get legal paperwork in order.
Doctors can sometimes help with difficult conversations (i.e., driving).
Get community resources.
Join a support group.
Caregiving does take a lot of effort.
Spending time together is a gift.
Caregiving can help you to learn grace, patience, and faithfulness.
Learn to look for the good.
Do the best you can.
Researching resources might find answers before you even need them.
To contact Nancy, order her books, signup for her newsletter, and request free resources, visit her website at www.NancyRPoland.com.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on the topics shared during last week’s interview with Debra Hallisey. She revisits the concepts around relationships that Debra shared from her book, The Caregiver’s Relationship Contract. In addition, Rayna explores how to set boundaries and navigate renegotiating them. Be sure to download the free resource Rayna provides related to these topics.
All relationships require boundaries.
Understanding your emotions can help you see if your boundaries are as strong as they should be.
Healthy boundaries ask others to respect your uniqueness, your choices, and your autonomy.
When caregiving, the needs are legitimate and real, but your boundaries need to be there as well.
Remember the quote from Anne Lamont, “No is a complete sentence.”
When setting boundaries, say, “I want to help, and this is what I need to be able to.”
Check out Debra’s book to view her suggestions to better navigate these conversations.
Please help spread the word to other caregivers by visiting the podcast platform you listen to and leaving a quick review of just a couple of sentences.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Debra Hallisey. Debra lost her job due to her caregiving responsibilities with her mother and, as a result, founded Advocate for Mom and Dad, LLC. In addition, based on her experiences, she has authored a book that provides a step-by-step guide for discussing relationship issues. Debra uses personal stories to illustrate how these techniques healed her relationship with her mom. She is also a Certified Caregiving Consultant, Educator, Advocate, and Certified Dementia Practitioner. She provides the following insights:
Caregiving changes all your relationships.
Summarize what you are willing to do and what you are not willing to do.
Do things where you feel heard, understood, and validated.
Unexposed expectations and boundaries need to be addressed.
When asking for a change, do not end with a yes or no question.
Recognize the frustration and ask, “Is this a reasonable request?”
Self-awareness is key.
Use the drip method when asking for help.
When others are helping ask yourself, Is it ‘wrong’ or just ‘different’?
Think about what can help you, write it down, and make it a S.M.A.R.T. ask.
Write down the way they want to live and figure out if that is something you or someone else can do.
Find resources from Debra at www.advocateformomanddad.com, and her book, Your Caregiving Relationship Contract, is available on Amazon.
Caregivers, you are doing the best you can, so give yourself grace.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Carlos Olivas III. Carlos was a guest last year on the podcast and immediately comes to mind when thinking about advocacy. He is the primary caregiver for his father living with Alzheimer’s since 2016. During this caregiving season, Carols has been able to connect, encourage, and empathize with caregivers from around the world. The journey has inspired him to advocate for elder health policy and the practice of self-care for caregivers. In addition, he is archiving and documenting his father’s progression through art. He is hopeful that the dementia community will embrace these artists living with this devastating disorder. Carlos and Rayna provide the following insights on caregiving and advocacy:
Eldercare policy is not something in the mainstream media.
We need to look after our elders with dignity and love.
Institutions and policies already in place need to be reviewed.
People need to be given information and educational resources to assist them with end-of-life eldercare challenges.
Contact your officials on issues that can help you. Have a conversation or send a letter to let them know what will make a difference for caregivers.
Share your stories with all who will listen.
Utilize the Alzheimer’s Association's 24/7 Helpline at 1-(800)-272-3900 and the information they provide to help with advocacy.
Advocate for research that includes all demographics.
Caregiver Support - Advocacy and On-Line Communities
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Usha Tewari. Usha is a first-generation Indian American, passionate advocate, and congressional ambassador. She worked full time at her government job and was the sole caregiver for her mother who had Alzheimer’s. Usha understands what it takes to advocate for individuals, and she shares her passion in this area and her caregiving journey on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. She provides the following insights:
Alzheimer’s is a healthcare tsunami with the associated medical and caregiving costs.
Advocacy is working. More and more lawmakers are open to listening as they have loved ones or associates who are affected.
Caregiving requires a lot of patience, paying attention, and juggling the different areas of your life.
Work from home or take a day off when you need with.
The social media caregiving community understands what you are going through and can provide support.
It is easier to learn from people with whom we relate.
Consider signing up to attend “Let’s Talk Dementia and Caregiving” to gain access to resources, personal stories, information about the disease, and more.
To connect with Usha, check out her social media at The Indian Caregiver and sign up for the event scheduled for February 19, 2022.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, expands on the concepts Lauren Dykovitz shared regarding her journey in caring for her mother with Early Onset Alzheimer’s. In addition, Rayna shares information on the basics of Alzheimer’s Disease and things you can do:
Alzheimer’s is a brain disorder that slowly destroys memory and thinking skills and a specific type of dementia.
Memory loss may not always be the first symptom.
Alzheimer’s affects thinking and problem-solving.
Visual perception issues are related to the damage happening within the brain and are a part of Alzheimer’s and dementia.
Language and the ability to communicate become impaired.
Most people are diagnosed in the middle stages of Alzheimer’s.
Utilize the Animal Fluency Screening.
Testing through your physician is available.
A heart-healthy diet is also a brain-healthy diet.
Support and assist with research. Check out Trial Match at Alz.org.
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Lauren Dykovitz. Lauren is a writer, author, wife, and dog mom. She became a family caregiver when her mother was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s in July 2010 when Lauren was only 25. Lauren started the Life, Love, and Alzheimer’s blog and social media pages to document her journey and share her experiences. She has written two books, and last year started offering online mentoring services for Alzheimer’s daughters. Lauren has made it her mission to help others on their caregiving journey and shares the following:
The journey can be difficult, isolating, and hard to accept.
Memory issues are not the only symptom of Alzheimer’s. Other things like having problems doing things they have always done, becoming withdrawn and less talkative, and vision problems can be signs too.
The diagnosis can feel like death because the relationship you knew or hoped for will never look that way.
Put the focus on your loved one and try to make them happy and bring joyful moments into their life.
Be mindful and live in the moment.
Connecting over the shared bond is powerful. The more you share your story and talk about it, the more you realize you are not alone.
To connect with Lauren, you can find her on social media and at her website at https://lifeloveandalzheimers.com/. You can find her books on Amazon.
Rayna Neises, ACC, host, reflects on her conversation from last week with Susan Stern. Susan shared several hands-on tips regarding resilience and its importance during the caregiving journey. Resilience is the capability to recover quickly from difficulties and Rayna provides the following suggestions for building resiliency:
Learn what your “WHY” is for your caregiving journey.
Be sure not to do things because of guilt.
Understand and set your boundaries and be willing to review them and change or offer alternative options.
Are you feeling walked on or taken advantage of? Evaluate what is happening so that changes can be made, and boundaries can be drawn.
Give yourself permission to set limits.
Boundaries will be pushed but having them established allows you to build resilience.
Reframing is switching the way you perceive something by looking at it from a different view. What can you reframe to experience the benefits?
This week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Susan Stern. Susan is a wife, mother, and family caregiver. After 20 years as a speech-language pathologist, she changed her career path to pursue her calling to support other caregivers. Susan became a certified coach and started her business helping overwhelmed family caregivers improve their self-care and life balance. She now helps family caregivers to be strong during one of life’s most challenging seasons. Susan shared the following tips:
Cultivate a sense of trust and respect.
View the relationship as a partnership in care.
Get the legal paperwork in place right away.
Find a way to support their independence for as long as possible.
A lack of good self-care can cost you your health.
Meditation can be helpful in self-care.
Make memories doing the things they can still do.
Try to have calm body language.
Be present with your loved one.
Permit yourself not to be perfect.
When faced with an urgent decision, stop, breathe, and look for options.
Protect your health.
Prioritize your self-care.
Develop good morning and evening routines.
Keep your medical appointments.
Find an emotional support system.
Manage stress.
Identify moments of joy.
Remember something funny to get you through a hard day.
What if the hardest season of your life became the place where wonder returned, marriage deepened, and purpose took root? That’s the heart of our conversation with caregiver and author Cathy Bennett, who spent nine years walking alongside her husband Michael through ALS—and found a new kind of faith and community in the process.
We open with the practical realities few outsiders see: the wheelchair, the Hoyer lift, the accessible van, the heavy “operator” tasks you never trained for but learn because love insists. Then we sit with the isolation that caregiving often creates—especially when a pandemic narrows your world—and we name why generic advice isn’t enough. Cathy explains how faith and solidarity among caregivers change the emotional math, easing the bitterness that can grow when you carry the load alone. She shares a powerful arc of belief as Michael, a lifelong tinkerer and nature buff, reconnects with God through the complexity and design he saw on screen. Along the way, marriage is reshaped by humility and gratitude; two driven people learn surrender and find their bond unexpectedly better, not smaller.
There are vivid moments of provision—a long-stalled cabin sale clearing the way to build an accessible home at exactly the right time—and there’s the quieter provision of a new calling. Cathy begins to write in the margins of caregiving, eventually crafting a devotional organized around fifty emotions caregivers know by heart. She launches a faith-based caregiver community where short devotions and prayer meet the needs of time-pressed listeners, offering daily encouragement without fluff. We also get practical: how to invite people into your real life so they can truly help, why worship music can reset the hardest hour of the day, and how to “tighten the loop between guilt and grace” after inevitable slip-ups.
If you’re caring for a spouse, parent, or friend—or supporting someone who is—you’ll find a rich mix of story, strategy, and hope. Subscribe, share this episode with a caregiver who needs strength for today, and leave a review to help others discover these stories of faith, resilience, and real-world care.
Encore Episode- Caregiving: Opportunity to Change, Learn and Honor Family
In this Encore Episode, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Carlos Olivas III. Carlos lived in Southern California where he was working a great job in live events doing production and design while raising his daughter. But life took a turn five years ago when he made the decision to move back to his childhood home to care for his father. As a result of his experience, he has developed a passion for research and educating himself about the Alzheimer’s experience. Carlos shares the following insights with everyone from his perspective as a primary caregiver:
The experience requires you to change and to look inward to adjust your ego, your attitude, and to become a better person.
The lifestyle change required is difficult because being able to go where you want and do what you want is no longer under your control.
Embracing change allows you to better approach the caregiving experience.
The research and education required to help your loved one allows you the opportunity to prepare for your future after your season of caring.
You are never too old to change!
Alzheimer’s is much more than just forgetting things.
Participating in/being a member of several caregiver support groups can be invaluable as you surround yourself with different types of people who are going through the same thing.
Breathing exercises/techniques can be beneficial in helping with self-control and relieving stress.
On this Encore Episode: Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Marty Stevens-Heebner. Marty is CEO of Clear Home Solutions. She created the company to help older adults and their families when their treasures, paperwork, and stuff get in the way of moving their lives forward. Marty was inspired to launch the company eight years ago after her experiences with her father and aunt. She provides the following insights:
It is always so much easier to organize somebody else’s stuff.
Start by identifying your absolute favorite, most useful things, and then figure out what else would be good.
The goal is to try to create the feeling of the home in the new, smaller home and make it a reflection of what they left behind.
Seeking help from move managers who are a neutral third-party can make the life-altering shift smoother.
Acknowledge that the move will not be easy and that there will be emotions for the person moving as well as the family members.
Break it down into steps like one drawer at a time or one hour at a time.
Encore Episode: Estate Planning is Not Just for When You Die
In the Encore Episode this week, Rayna Neises, your host, talks with Catherine Hodder Esq. Catherine is an attorney and author of the bestseller, “Estate Planning for the Sandwich Generation: How to Help Your Parents and Protect Your Kids”. "Planning is bringing the future into the present so that you can do something about it now." according to Alan Lakein. This quote is appropriate for all the great information Catherine shares in this episode:
Family members who do not reside in the same location can still play a vital role on the caregiving team.
‘Sandwich Generation’ refers to people generally in their thirties and forties who have young children they are still supporting, and they also have aging parents.
Start with getting your own house in order by obtaining a Financial Power of Attorney and a Medical Power of Attorney.
Due to HIPPA, you also need Power of Attorney documents, both medical and financial, for children 18 and older.
Documenting your end-of-life decisions is a gift because you take the burden off your loved ones.
Once your house is in order, you can then focus on what your parents need to have in place.
Asking for your parent’s advice on what you should do or for their opinion on situations affecting other friends and relatives is can open the door for further discussions.
Five necessary conversations to have with your aging parent(s):
Financial
Medical
Living Arrangements When Aging
End of Life
Legacy
Do not have just one conversation, but instead make it ongoing.
Focus on getting the information that is important to your parent(s) without judging, negotiating, or influencing the situation.
Create a family binder of information to have everything in one place. Include legal documents, financial information, bank accounts, funeral arrangements, list of passwords, insurance policies, pension information, etc.