Explore every episode of the podcast A Chat with Uma
| Title | Pub. Date | Duration | |
|---|---|---|---|
| 48. Everything You Need to Know About DBS & TMS: Precision Targeting, Biotypes, & the Brain Basis of OCD & Depression with Dr. Martijn Figee | 28 Jul 2025 | 02:09:57 | |
On episode 48 of A Chat with Uma, I sit down with psychiatrist–neuroscientist Dr. Martijn Figee, MD., PhD—director of Mount Sinai’s Interventional Psychiatry Program & a groundbreaking pioneer in neurostimulation (e.g. DBS, TMS) for psychiatric disorders, especially OCD & depression—for a clear, grounded tour of circuit‑based psychiatry. This is the science companion to last week’s episode with Jon Nelson (ep. 47): today's episode builds on Jon's lived experience to explain how & why the brain can change (in minutes!) when the right circuit is engaged. We unpack deep brain stimulation (DBS) surgery & transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS), what “target selection” actually means, & how phenotyping (motor, cognitive, & negative‑affect circuits) guides targeting. We also get practical: access & eligibility, what insurers & clinicians look for, when to choose TMS first, & how accelerated TMS paired with ERP can fast‑track change. We bust myths (OCD ≠ “just the amygdala”) & look ahead to biotyping work designed to match people to the right target the first time--a real step toward precision psychiatry. If you want a rigorous, hopeful explainer of why electricity can be medicine & what that means for folks suffering, this episode shares everything you need to know from the world's expert! Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Welcome & introduction to Dr. Martijn Figee! Connect with Dr. Martijn Figee!
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| 47. The Pacemaker in My Brain: Treatment‑Resistant Depression, Deep Brain Stimulation (DBS), & Pulverizing the Stigma with Jon Nelson (ft. Dr. Martijn Figee) | 21 Jul 2025 | 02:23:14 | |
On episode 47 of A Chat with Uma, I sit down with my dear friend Jon Nelson—lived-experience mental health expert & longtime healthcare comms exec—whose decade of treatment-resistant depression nearly killed him before an experimental deep brain stimulation (DBS) surgery flipped the circuit & brought instant remission in 2022. Jon shares the unfiltered, brutal reality of suicidal depression & how anger became fuel for advocacy. We trace his decade of every failed treatment—while his wife & kids bore the invisible trauma of caregiving. He breaks down the difference between sadness & clinical disease, the neurological reality of “choosing life,” & why suicidality is a symptom—not a character flaw. Mid-episode, his psychiatrist Dr. Martijn Figee joins to unpack their shared experience of navigating DBS. Equal parts remission, reclamation, and rebellion—Jon turns survival into a movement to pulverize the stigma of serious mental illness. And come back next week for a solo episode with Dr. Figee, deep-diving into the science of DBS! Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & welcome to Jon! (00:08:40) Where does Jon come from? Upbringing, background, formative years (00:18:50) Dislocation at 16 → situational depression, honing empathy; college & NYC healthcare advertising years (00:30:40) The descent: depression as cellular “poison,” initial denial, & suicidality as symptom—not weakness, drama, or moral failing (00:49:30) The caregiver toll: bathtub breakdowns, kids’ confusion, insurance combat, financial strain (00:57:30) A decade of failed interventions: 10+ meds, ketamine (IV & nasal), 36 TMS, 11 ECT (memory loss), residential & PHP/IOP cycles (01:22:00) Absolute hopelessness, stigma, & the slim reason to stay (01:28:40) Deep Brain Stimulation prep: trial entry, consent, mindset, surgical risks (01:34:00) Switch flipped: activation, instant remission, and the shock of neutral daily life (01:37:10) Relief & righteous anger: gratitude colliding with a decade of preventable suffering (01:41:00) Dr. Martijn Figee, Jon's psychiatrist: translating “poison” affect into subcallosal cingulate circuit target (01:48:10) Phenotype → target: differentiating negative affect circuitry from OCD loops, guiding lead (or TMS coil) placement (01:52:30) Toward precision psychiatry: circuit diagnostics over trial‑and‑error pharmacology (01:55:00) Pulverize The Stigma: public truth‑telling, rejecting “difficult to treat,” anger as disciplined fuel (01:57:30) Centering caregivers: invisible labor, secondary trauma, & shared remission (01:59:40) Advocacy blueprint: accountability for insurers, institutions, & language reform (02:02:00) Redefining recovery as access to ordinary life & collective responsibility Connect with Jon! Connect with Dr. Martijn Figee:
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| 38. Whoa, I Made It To 29! Birthday & Cancerversary Reflections, Answering Your 29 Questions | 28 Apr 2025 | 01:23:35 | |
On episode 38 of A Chat with Uma, I reflect on both my 29th birthday & 6th anniversary of my cancer diagnosis. I share a live, raw, completely unedited account of everything rising to the surface as I turn 29. I speak at length about the awe and gratitude I feel for still being here + alive, and remember how staying on this planet for this long once felt utterly impossible. I talk through the rapid transformation of life that has unfolded since cancer, and all the recovery and reckoning that has followed—how wildly different everything looks compared with anything I could’ve imagined. I speak candidly about my current state of being, including the full spectrum of emotions that arrive when my birthday and my cancerversary land back-to-back. I walk through body memories, survivor’s guilt, and the transformative power of letting loved ones celebrate me anyway. I share concrete examples of how meeting life with my authentic self keeps creating experiences I never thought were remotely possible. Next, I answer 29 questions from YOU—everything from my coffee lifestyle and metal concerts to the hardest parts of living with PTSD + OCD, from “doing enough” to what self-compassion actually looks like when it finally lands. Through these answers & my reflections, I explore the duality of existence, the astonishment of how life looks, and the awe of continuing to travel the continuum of human experience. Above all, this episode is a statement of love, gratitude, acceptance, and holding hope for every single beautiful human listening—especially through the darkest and most impossible moments you may live through. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Welcome & why I'm recording this episode
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| 37. What IS a Psychedelic?: The Beginner's Guide To Psychedelic Science | 21 Apr 2025 | 01:09:39 | |
On episode 37 of A Chat with Uma, I hit pause on the lived experience & nitty-gritty research and rewind all the way to Psychedelics 101: What exactly counts as a psychedelic? Why do ketamine and MDMA show up in the same conversations as LSD and psilocybin even though they work on totally different receptors? In this deep‑dive I define "mind-manifesting," untangle the three big branches of hallucinogens, give an extra basic chemistry crash course (Lego analogies included), and walk through the neurobiology that turns a few serotonin receptors into weeks of heightened brain plasticity. You’ll also hear why “set and setting” actually matter, how non‑hallucinogenic 5‑HT2A receptor compounds are storming drug development pipelines, and a rapid‑fire myth‑busting round that debunks everything from “natural equals safe” to “one trip and you might never come back.” By the end you’ll have a clear map of the molecules, mechanisms, and mind‑manifesting experiences that shape today’s psychedelic landscape—plus the language to call out sloppy headlines when you see them. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Welcome back & why it's long past time for a Psychedelics 101 primer (00:01:52) 1956 flash‑back: Osmond, Huxley, and coining “psychedelic” (00:03:54) Two scientific litmus tests—5‑HT2A receptor engagement and the subjective “mind‑manifesting” fingerprint (00:07:06) Meet the core four: LSD, psilocybin/psilocin, DMT/5‑MeO‑DMT, mescaline (00:10:36) Hallucinogen family tree—classical psychedelics vs. dissociatives vs. deliriants (00:13:54) Ketamine’s NMDA detour and why they are not psychedelics (but... are they though?) (00:16:40) MDMA as empathogens / entactogens—psychedelic "cousins" (again... are they?) (00:18:22) Why cocaine, meth, and opioids are not psychedelics (00:24:38) How scientists slice the pie differently: phenomenology, pharmacology, neurobiology (00:27:18) Psychoplastogens, metaplasticity, and the rise of non‑hallucinogenic 5‑HT2A receptor drugs (00:30:02) Chemistry crash course—tryptamines, ergolines, phenethylamines in Lego form (00:33:56) Nature‑grown vs. lab‑crafted, & pro-drugs (00:39:00) Dose, route, and how chemical compositions shape your trip (00:45:14) Receptor binding → signaling cascades → neuroplasticity (00:52:16) Default‑mode downshift, whole‑brain hyper‑connectivity, and the plasticity window (00:55:08) Set, setting, and why supportive containers slash bad‑trip rates (01:00:58) Myth‑busting lightning round—ketamine ≠ psychedelic, holes‑in‑brain, “natural = safe,” more (01:05:36) Key takeaways, why clear language matters, and a teaser for upcoming guest interviews Connect with me!
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| 36. Everything You Need To Know About Scientific Research: Peer Review & Publishing Papers | 14 Apr 2025 | 00:50:08 | |
On episode 36 of A Chat with Uma, I continue the “Everything You Need to Know About Scientific Research” series by breaking down everything you need to know about peer review and publishing papers! Here, I unpack the journey from raw data to a peer‑reviewed paper—the stage where independent experts test every assumption, statistic, and conclusion before the work can stand as part of the scientific record. You’ll learn why publishing is incredibly competitive after everything navigated to get the grant in the first place, how different review models (single‑blind, double‑blind, open, and registered reports) work, and what safeguards exist to catch bias or outright fraud. We’ll also clear up common misconceptions—like who actually pays publication fees, what "peer review" actually means, whether industry can “buy” favorable results, and how to spot predatory journals that mimic the real thing. By the end, you’ll know how to read research headlines with a sharper eye and a fuller understanding of the system behind them. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Welcome back & why peer review is the gatekeeper after funding (00:01:28) Grants vs. journals: the true currency of scientific reputation
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| 35. Yes, I've Done Psychedelics, Part 2: From Psychonaut to Researcher | 07 Apr 2025 | 01:15:14 | |
On episode 35 of A Chat with Uma, I provide the long‑overdue follow‑up to my 2023 episode “Yes, I’ve Done Psychedelics: From Psychonaut to Researcher!” Two years (and many trips) later, I walk you through how psychedelics have woven themselves into my recovery from OCD, PTSD, and treatment‑resistant depression--and how my relationship to them has evolved. I’m candid about the depression pattern I now recognize: months of slow improvement, a frightening slide into suicidal exhaustion, and finally the “as‑needed biological intervention” of a macro‑dose psilocybin session. I share why I now treat psilocybin as an “as‑needed biological intervention,” how my move to Madison and recovery gains changed the cadence of those sessions, and how I’m learning to identify red‑flag symptoms earlier so I don’t wait until rock‑bottom. Throughout the episode I’m brutally honest about the hellish parts: intrusive‑thought torture, eye‑burning exhaustion, and the constant urge to postpone each dose because I hate the experience even while I depend on the after‑effects. I describe how each trip has dovetailed with psychotherapy treatment for OCD, PTSD, and depression, and what last week’s brutally intense—but surprisingly fast‑acting—trip has already done for my mental state. If you want a raw, first‑person account of using psychedelics to carve out months of functional life—and why I still need intensive mental health treatment, behavioral change, and a healthy life to continue through recovery—here it is in its fullest form. Listen to these contextual episodes first:
Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Recapping Part 1 from two years ago, where I left off with ketamine treatments, and how today’s episode picks up from where we left off (00:02:40) Why I share these vulnerable stories, disclaimers on anecdotal use, and how personal experiences shape broader conversations about psychedelics (00:09:00) The ‘As‑Needed’ Psilocybin Plan: How I decided to approach psilocybin on a loosely scheduled basis, what “biological intervention” means to me... and why I still push it off (00:18:00) From Ketamine Insights to Psilocybin Sessions: Unpacking what daily ketamine “torture” taught me about intrusive thoughts, the mind‑body split, and rediscovering color in life (00:23:00) Facing Relapse & ‘Rock Bottom’ Warnings: Tracking my early warning signs of depression, the classic OCD loops, and learning to heed those signals before everything shuts down (00:34:00) Exploring how moving to Madison, a supportive environment, and evidence-based therapy widened the gap between needing trips, sometimes up to eight months; Recap of my trips since 2023 (00:56:00) The Most Recent Trip (March 2025): A raw look at my week‑old session: the usual “hell” meets an unexpected flash of self‑compassion, plus the quicker‑than‑normal bounce‑back effect (01:07:00) The unique relief I'm already experiencing from this trip, small windows of joy, and final reflections on integrating future psychedelics with therapy and recovery Connect with me!
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| 34. Everything You Need To Know About Scientific Research | Funding 101: How Science Gets Paid For | 31 Mar 2025 | 01:00:26 | |
On episode 34 of A Chat with Uma, I continue the “Everything You Need to Know About Scientific Research” series by breaking down one of the most misunderstood parts of the scientific process: funding. I explain how labs secure (and often struggle to secure) the money needed to pay salaries, buy equipment, and keep the lights on—and why the competition for grants is more cutthroat than many realize. Along the way, I debunk myths about “rich” scientists, reveal the harsh truth of acceptance rates (sometimes below 10%), and show how even a multi-million-dollar grant can vanish quickly once overhead and experimental costs are covered. I also address common misconceptions that lead the public to believe funding is wasted on bizarre or irrelevant projects. By giving real-world examples—from “shrimp on a treadmill” to mental-health studies in lab animals—I illustrate how “strange-sounding” research can deliver breakthroughs critical to medicine, technology, and our broader understanding of human health. If you’ve ever wondered where tax dollars for science really go, this episode offers a behind-the-scenes look at the competitive, complex, and endlessly challenging world of research funding. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:01:00) Introduction: how science gets paid for and the crucial role of grant money
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| 33. Everything You Need To Know About Scientific Research: How Scientists Are Trained, pt. 2 | 17 Mar 2025 | 01:27:40 | |
In episode 33 of A Chat with Uma, I continue with part 2 of my deep dive into how scientists are trained, as part of the “Everything You Need to Know About Scientific Research” series. Picking up where I left off last time, I focus on the PhD as the central—and often most intense—phase of a scientist’s training path toward independence. I explain how researchers progress from dependent trainees to experts in their field, covering everything from learning to design experiments, to managing lab resources, to balancing the emotional and intellectual demands that come with advanced study. I further discuss the options to complete training after a Ph.D vs. pursuing a postdoctoral fellowship, and the added levels of training that occur during a postdoc. To round out the conversation, I also touch on the intricacies of training for physician researchers and the unique paths MD/PhD and MD holders may take as they bridge medicine and research. Ultimately, my goal is to show you exactly why becoming a professional scientist is such a marathon. The PhD years are unlike any other phase, blending technical skill-building with growth in critical thinking, leadership, and a big dose of grit. By the end of this episode—together with last week’s discussion—you’ll see how these training stages add up to a truly rigorous process, ensuring that the people behind major biomedical breakthroughs are more than prepared to take on the world’s unanswered questions. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Welcoming you back and linking this episode to last week’s discussion on Master’s-level and early research training
(01:03:41) Choosing a path after the PhD—why you’re already considered an expert trained scientist, and deciding on a non-academic job or a postdoctoral fellowship (01:06:22) Choosing a postdoc: what determines its length and scope, and how it paves the way toward faculty positions or higher-level non-academic positions (01:14:00) Added steps for physician-scientists (MD/PhD) to conduct research and how non-PhD physicians acquire training to conduct research (01:23:06) Concluding thoughts on how both episodes together form a complete map of the scientific training pipeline Connect with me!
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| 32. Everything You Need To Know About Scientific Research: How Scientists Are Trained, pt. 1 | 10 Mar 2025 | 01:01:34 | |
On episode 32 of A Chat With Uma, as part of the “Everything You Need to Know About Scientific Research” series, we begin a 2-part overview of the full training pipeline that researchers work through to become independent biomedical research scientists. I unpack the differences between simply knowing established scientific facts and actively generating new knowledge in a lab setting, showing how hands-on mentorship, repetitive trial-and-error, and deep immersion in research culture form the backbone of scientific training. Whether it’s undergraduates finding their footing, post-baccalaureate technicians refining their skills, or Master’s students tackling more advanced projects, this episode examines the practical, day-to-day realities that bring a scientific career to life. By walking through each level of training in detail, I illustrate why scientific expertise stems from years of incremental growth rather than a quick leap into advanced classes. You’ll hear how labs function as collaborative learning spaces, why mastering techniques and analytical thinking takes patience, and how early independence in the lab opens the door to meaningful contributions. These episodes provide a transparent guide to the foundational stages that shape both scientists’ skill sets and their dedication to rigorous, evidence-based discovery. Ultimately, these episodes serve to improve public misunderstandings and skepticism of research training, and counter its resulting effects on the survival of our scientific research enterprise. We will continue this episode next week by discussing future training stages: PhD, post-doc, transitioning to full independence, and an addendum on physician-specific research training. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Overview of the general training pipeline for scientists
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| 31. Everything You Need To Know About Scientific Research: Why This Matters (And Why Now?) | 03 Mar 2025 | 01:18:50 | |
On episode 31 of A Chat with Uma, I launch my ‘Everything You Need To Know About Scientific Research’ series by sharing an overview of what I aim to cover in the coming episodes within this series, and the personal and professional lenses that bring me to this conversation. I talk through the current crises facing scientific research, how they are affecting research (including me) at this very moment, and why this is relevant to EVERYONE. I discuss my professional and personal background, and how my unique vantage point—spanning biomedical research, lived experience mental health advocacy, and science communication—positions me to see the urgent gaps and challenges facing biomedical research, including major funding cuts and widespread misinformation, and the steps we can take to bridge these gaps. This episode shares my motivations, the prerequisites I hope you will integrate before diving into future episodes, and the importance of good faith, mutual respect, and respectful dialogue in navigating these current crises. I overview upcoming topics, invite you to contribute your questions to this series, and share my hopes of us ALL working together toward the shared mission of advancing human health. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) — Introduction & purpose of the series (00:12:28) Essential caveats & prerequisites to this episode & series (00:22:25) – My background & intersecting expertises relevant to this conversation: science, lived experience, advocacy, and science communication (00:49:24) – Naming the current crises in research & its devastating impacts (00:58:11) – Why I believe these crises are happening AND how I think we can help fix them; The direct impacts on me and my own research (01:11:43) — Why I need YOUR help to co-create this series: How you can contribute to this & support science! Connect with me!
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| 30. My Mental Health Journey: Part 5 | 24 Feb 2025 | 00:57:34 | |
On episode 30 of 'A Chat with Uma', a follow-up to last week’s episode, I continue my mental health update from the past 2 years, sharing what recovery has truly looked like—from OCD and PTSD treatment to navigating depressive episodes and breakthroughs with my eating disorder. I open up about the impact of psilocybin in interrupting my depression and how my ERP progress has finally moved the needle on my Y-BOCS scores. I also share my experience starting PTSD treatment for the first time with prolonged written exposure and how it has tapped into emotions and memories I thought were long buried. This episode is a deep dive into the raw, nonlinear reality of recovery—where self-compassion, discomfort, and courage collide. It’s about the work, the trust, the setbacks, and the triumphs, and why I am still, always, in the thick of the process. Contextual episodes:
Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Part 2: Picking up where we left off last week! (00:03:25) The 4 stages of competence and working toward recovery from unconscious incompetence (00:07:45) Battling moral scrupulosity and becoming aware of my (many) mental compulsions (00:14:50) The role of self-compassion (and my resistance to it) (00:21:20) Psilocybin & depression, again: how psilocybin pulled me out of another deep depressive episode. newfound depression recovery gains since, and set the stage for real progress in my ERP journey (00:24:40) Measuring progress: when the Y-BOCS finally moved! (00:29:15) Healing in unexpected places: food, movement, and chronic pain (00:37:50) PTSD treatment begins: Why we're doing written exposure instead of traditional prolonged exposure (00:46:25) The messy middle of recovery: why there’s no neat bow to tie around this journey—and how living, healing, and struggling can all coexist. Connect with me!
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| 29. My Mental Health Journey: Part 4 | 17 Feb 2025 | 01:02:48 | |
On episode 29 of 'A Chat with Uma,' I share an in-depth update on my mental health journey, picking up from where I left off two years ago. I talk through the challenges and growth I’ve experienced in lacking OCD & PTSD treatment while completing my master’s, navigating a cross-country move, and starting my PhD program. I share honestly about living with ongoing severe OCD, PTSD, and depression while navigating the complexities of life transitions within recovery. I discuss the difficulty of finding effective treatment after multiple traumatic experiences with providers, and how meeting my current OCD- and PTSD-specialized therapist became a pivotal turning point. I also share about my ongoing experiences with psychedelics to triage severe depressive episodes, and how it supported me through the intense transition into my PhD program before beginning proper therapeutic treatment. Next week's episode (part 5) will talk through all the details of my treatment journey over the past 1.5 years with my new therapist, and where I am with in my recovery journey with OCD, PTSD, depression, anxiety, and bulimia. Contextual episodes:
Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Hello & Welcome! (00:03:15) My mental health during the past 2 years since my last podcast update (00:07:45) The consequences of being in OCD & PTSD treatment limbo for 1 year (00:14:25) Finding my new OCD & PTSD therapist in Wisconsin (00:25:30) Moving to Madison & confronting my worsening depressive episode (00:33:10) Intervening with psychedelics during severe depression downswings (00:44:30) Beginning with my new OCD & PTSD therapist while navigating the first semester of my Ph.D (00:53:20) Viewing my PhD as recovery bootcamp (00:58:10) The hardest lesson—Thoughts are not (always) real (01:01:25) What’s next: Part 5 coming next week! Connect with me!
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| 46. From Foster Care to Harvard Neuroscientist: The Choice to Live, Maternal Psychedelics, & Post-Viral Chronic Illnesses with Dr. Ya’el Courtney | 30 Jun 2025 | 02:11:33 | |
On episode 46 of A Chat with Uma, I speak with Dr. Ya’el Courtney—a neuroscientist whose life traverses extreme circumstances that most only read about. Removed from an abusive, violent, fundamentalist household at 15, she spent her teen years couch-surfing, battling eating disorders & self-harm, working night shifts, & finishing high school coursework as her own teacher. She forged a transcript to escape poverty, later confessed, earned a GED, &—after years of 40-hour workweeks in fast food & bartending—won a full scholarship to Kent State. Ya’el’s love of science carried her to Harvard for a PhD in Neuroscience, where she discovered how serotonin-sensing cells in the fetal brain release “packets” of growth signals—& why activating that pathway with certain drugs (including psychedelics) can derail neurodevelopment. Today, she is a Jane Coffin Childs postdoctoral fellow at Stanford, studying how infections such as Epstein–Barr, Lyme, & SARS-CoV-2 spark long-term neurological illness. We talk frankly about the cost of doing science while poor, eating disorder recovery, post-viral chronic illnesses, & the quiet solidarity required to push for better funding & fair wages inside elite institutions. Ya’el’s story is a testament to the power of showing up anyway—of choosing truth, carving out possibility where none existed, & daring to build a future no one handed you. Her courage & brilliance make this one of the most unforgettable conversations we’ve had. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & welcome to Dr. Ya’el Courtney! Connect with Ya'el!
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| 28. I’M BACK! Where I’ve Been, & Where We’re Going From Here | 10 Feb 2025 | 01:03:05 | |
On episode 28 of 'A Chat with Uma,' I return to the podcast after a year-long hiatus to launch its next era! In this raw, unfiltered, tell-all episode (in true Uma fashion, of course), I talk us through the wild year that led to my unexpected hiatus, my PhD journey, the unexpected adjustment of navigating this new chapter, and the paralyzing fears that kept me from picking the mic back up up again. I open up about perfectionism, the overwhelming realization that people (including scientists and clinicians!) were actually listening, and the endless self-doubt that stifled me. Most importantly, I share all of the reasons that led me to come back - how I’m facing my fears and self-doubt, learning to accept imposter syndrome, making space for my health & well-being amongst all of my values-driven work, and letting myself be seen. I’m so grateful to be back here with you and can’t wait for everything to come for us! Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) HI! We’re BACK! (00:01:40) The unplanned hiatus (00:05:00) Moving to Madison, beginning my Ph.D, and navigating constant transition & uncertainty (00:18:00) The overwhelm & burnout of it all (00:25:40) Imposter syndrome, perfectionism, self-doubt, and the paralyzing fear of being seen (00:36:00) The comeback: How and why I’m facing all of my fears to be here and show up fully (00:53:20) What’s coming next for the podcast? (01:00:00) Gratitude, reflections, and moving into our next era Connect with me!
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| 27. From Me-search To Research: How I Turned My Lived Experience Into An Independent Research Project | 26 Oct 2023 | 01:33:43 | |
On episode 27 of A Chat with Uma, I share my full experience of developing a fully independent research project inspired by my lived experience as a patient. I share the full story of how this project was born, and how this idea developed into a full research project that has resulted in presentations, awards, published abstracts, acceptance into Ph.D programs, and an upcoming publication. I discuss the experience of forging my own path as a single-author presenter as a student, and how I navigated various scenarios through this journey. I reflect on how this project provided novel avenues for my advocacy as a patient, and how I bridged my identities as a researcher, patient, & advocate as a result. This episode provides tangible tips and resources for pursuing one's own independent research project, empowering anyone listening to forge their own path and believe in what's possible for them. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Checking in with ya'll! (00:10:20) Introduction to the episode Contextual episodes:
(00:19:25) EVENT REPLAY: IOCDF's OCD Con 2023 Keynote Address
(00:21:56) UPCOMING EVENTS:
(00:25:22 ) Context & background behind the inception of my independent research project
(00:38:30) How the project developed and evolved into posters, presentations, and awards
(01:00:25) How the project expedited my academic timeline, changed the course of my career, and contributed to getting into my Ph.D program
(01:22:56) Key takeaways and tangible tools to develop & pursue your own independent research project Connect with me!
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| 26. OCD 101 & My Full OCD Story: Misdiagnosis, Evidence-Based Treatment, OCD Myth Busting, & Comorbidities | 09 Oct 2023 | 02:03:35 | |
On episode 26 of A Chat with Uma, I dedicate a full episode to OCD awareness, in honor of OCD Awareness Week 2023. I provide a full primer on OCD 101 - all about what OCD is NOT, and what it IS. I share my full OCD story of onset, symptoms, misdiagnosis, delayed treatment, incorrect treatment, and what evidence-based treatment has looked like. I speak at length about my non-linear path within treatment, normalizing the coexistence of both suffering and recovery at once. I dismantle misconceptions and bust pervasive myths about what OCD is considered to be by popular culture, and discuss the repercussions of misinformation around OCD. Above all, I provide empowerment, validation, and hope around the OCD experience through speaking openly and honestly about all facets of living with obsessive-compulsive disorder. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Intro, overview, why I am recording this episode today (00:13:04) UPCOMING EVENT: Made of Millions OCD Socratic Seminar: BIPOC Representation in the OCD Space
(00:14:21) UPCOMING EVENT: IOCDF Live Stream Panel - Diversity Starts With UsTues. 9/26, 7 ET
(00:15:13) UPCOMING EVENT: IOCDF Advocate Instagram Live
(00:15:55) UPCOMING EVENT: OCD Gamechangers: Live Advocate Virtual Event
(00:17:04) UPCOMING EVENT + ANNOUNCEMENT: Online OCD Conference - KEYNOTE ADDRESS!
(00:18:16) ANNOUNCEMENT: Joining OCD Wisconsin's Board of Directors (00:20:25) What OCD is NOT:
(00:38:18) What OCD actually IS:
(00:54:22) My FULL OCD story
(01:33:24) What evidence-based treatment & recovery has looked like for me
(01:45:02) Reconciling the time lost to misdiagnosis & lack of treatment
(01:55:04) Rapid-fire final OCD myth busting:
Connect with me!
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| 25. From College Dropout to Graduate Student: Navigating Graduate School Applications & Admissions as a Nontraditional Student | 21 Sep 2023 | 01:39:35 | |
On episode 25 of A Chat with Uma, I share my full journey of applying for graduate school as a non-traditional student with a very divergent & complicated academic + personal history. I share my experience in full detail of applying for clinical psychology Ph.D programs earlier on in my academic journey, and how + why I ultimately chose to pursue my masters in neuroscience. I discuss how vastly different my experience was as a student whose path was so divergent from anyone around me, and the resulting confusion about my future & chances due to having no basis + reference point about my own journey. I explain how I navigated the ambiguity of applying to Ph.D programs with my unique journey, and why I ultimately decided to try. I speak at length about every detail of my application experience as a non-traditional student: including disclosure in personal statements, my CV, internet/social media "outing," recommendation letters, interviews, and more. This episode serves to provide evidence & hope that pursuing academic endeavors as a non-traditional student with a divergent past IS possible. I share all of my advice, empowerment, experiences, and honest reflections from my experiences in the hopes that others feel valid & hopeful about forcing their own paths with their unique lived experiences. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Intro & overview of episode (00:07:48) Update: Video + event recording repository of many past events (00:10:18) UPCOMING EVENT: Hosting IOCDF's Community Conversations - Tues. 9/26, 7 ET (00:11:35) EVENT REPLAY: Co-hosted IOCDF's Community Conversations with Tom Smalley (00:12:23) EVENT REPLAY: IOCDF Diversity Roundtable on Suicide Prevention - with Dr. Darlene Davis Goodwine, Krista Reed, & Erika McCoy (00:14:08) UPCOMING EVENT: Online IOCDF OCD Conference 2023 & ticket giveaway!
(00:16:55 ) Brief background from my undergraduate degree & considering next steps Contextual episodes:
(00:23:33) Applying to grad school the first time
(00:32:46) Starting my masters degree in neuroscience
(00:41:55) The wide range of evaluations & judgments I received due to my unprecedented, non-traditional academic path (00:45:48) How and why I decided to apply to Neuroscience Ph.D programs, in spite of the odds; How I "broke the rules" of the typical application process (00:51:38) How I specifically chose schools, programs, and mentors as a non-traditional student (01:02:53) How I "broke the rules" in navigating disclosure + talking about my non-traditional path as an applicant
(01:16:48) Recommendation letters:
(01:26:36) Ph.D Interviews: how they went, how I navigated disclosure, the results of my applications, closing out the episode Connect with me!
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| 24. Nontraditional Students: My Experiences, Advice, & Reflections From My Nontraditional Academic Path | 07 Sep 2023 | 01:05:20 | |
On episode 24 of A Chat with Uma, I share a comprehensive overview of my experience and journey as a non-traditional question - informed and shaped by the many questions from listeners & this community on this topic! I first operationally define the concept of a non-traditional student, sharing the various contributing factors that give rise to holding this identity. I share my full timeline and trajectory as a non-traditional student, explaining the circumstances that contributed to my divergent journey. I speak to the unique barriers and obstacles that I faced as a non-traditional student in returning back to school, as well as further goals and aspirations that required disclosure of this identity/label. I share at length about the unique stigmas, judgments, and misperceptions placed on non-traditional students and the ways that I have navigated them so far. This episode serves to provide a voice to students who hold this title and reframe the way that we view divergent journeys. This episode also provides a safe and supportive space to validate and empower people from different walks of life to pursue this path with hope, pride, and ownership of their identities and lived experiences. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Hello, check-in, overview of episode (00:07:05) Update: Video + event recording repository of many past events (00:10:35) Update: You can now support my work on Ko-Fi! (00:13:11) What is a non-traditional student? Definition, conceptualization, orientation to episode (00:16:26) The background and story of how I became a non-traditional student - Severe mental and physical chronic illnesses - Failing out of school after 2 years with a 1.83 GPA - My 2nd degree in music school - Losing my voice to cancer - How I went back to my first degree as a non-traditional student - Contextual episodes: 01. My Full Story: 0 to 26 02-04. My Mental Health Journey: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 (00:25:06) Officially becoming a non-traditional student, how I decided to go back to school (00:32:17) Completing my undergraduate degree, how I ended up pursuing my master's degree and now my Ph.D (00:49:06) Speaking to the stigmas, misperceptions, barriers, and unique experiences of non-traditional students (00:56:08) Lack of consent in disclosure and privacy of identity and related experiences, diagnoses, and circumstances for non-traditional students (01:00:51) Lessons learned, final reflections, and future explorations and episodes on this topic Connect with me!
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| 23. Life Updates: Moving To Wisconsin, Mental Health Treatments, Psychedelics, & Starting My Ph.D | 31 Aug 2023 | 01:20:25 | |
On episode 23 of A Chat with Uma, I provide an honest and unfiltered life update in light of many recent major life changes. I share openly and honestly about the difficulties I faced in moving to Wisconsin, and all that has transpired in this adjustment period. I speak about the struggles that contributed to my experience, as well as the steps I took to work through them. I talk through my most recent psychedelic experience and its contribution to the upward spiral that I have embarked upon since moving to Madison. I share from the heart about my recovery and healing process, and how it has looked far different than I ever expected. I share updates on my current treatment process, and I talk through the start of my Ph.D in neuroscience. Overall, this episode opens a window into the complexity and ever-evolving journey of recovery, discovery, healing, and growth that I am on, with the hope of creating a space for you to allow and accept the true nature of your own life experience with honesty and compassion. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Hello, check-in, overview of episode (00:06:29) Update: Video + event recording repository of many past events (00:08:53) Update: You can now support my work on Ko-Fi! (00:11:21) Background on episode: where I was at our last life update/check-in
(00:18:47) Recap of this past summer and my state of being since graduating in May (00:23:52) Reflections on my fear of fear, and working to accept my reality (00:33:16) Recap of moving from Dallas to Madison (00:39:57) My most recent psychedelic experience: why I did it, and all that resulted (00:50:05) Reflections and updates on recovery, growth, and change post-session; Reflections on how living in Madison is unexpectedly supporting my healing (00:58:46) Updates on where I am with therapy/treatment; Embarking on new treatment for my comorbid OCD & PTSD (01:05:07) Updates on starting my Ph.D in Neuroscience at the University of Wisconsin-Madison; Major changes I am making to my life & way of operating (01:14:24) Final thoughts, reflections, calls to action, and hopes for the future Connect with me!
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| 22. How To Survive Your Ph.D: Addiction Research, Science Communication, Boundaries, & Being Your Unique Self with Dr. Elizabeth Berry | 17 Aug 2023 | 01:36:16 | |
On episode 22 of A Chat with Uma, I speak with Dr. Elizabeth Berry! Elizabeth Berry, Ph.D is a neuroscientist, addiction researcher, science communicator, artist, and digital creator. Dr. Berry just received her Ph.D in Cell Biology with a specialization in neuroscience from New York Medical College this past May. For her dissertation project, she focused on opioid addiction and the impact it has on specific neurons in the brain called orexin neurons. She is currently working as a postdoctoral fellow in Dr. Leonard’s lab, the lab she did her dissertation in, furthering the research she pursued during her PhD. In the future she hopes to work in an industry position as a scientist on neurodegenerative diseases. She is also the creator behind @nature.neuroscience.phd, her widely-regarded science communication and digital art platform. In this episode, we discuss the following topics (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction of episode & Dr. Elizabeth Berry (00:04:07) Dr. Berry's journey to becoming a neuroscientist
(00:19:59) All about Dr. Berry's Ph.D experience
(00:31:49) Dr. Berry's addiction neuroscience research
(00:44:19) Dr. Berry's reflections on work/life balance as a researcher
(00:59:08) All about Dr. Berry's massively successful science communication platform
(01:08:38) All about Dr. Berry's career plans
(01:20:52) How Dr. Berry has utilized movement as a vital self-care tool through her intensive schedule (01:25:01) DEEP rapid-fire final questions with Dr. Berry, and closing out the episode!
Connect with Dr. Elizabeth Berry:
Connect with me!
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| 21. The Truth About Self-Compassion: OCD, Anxiety, Eating Disorders, & Chronic Illness with Kimberley Quinlan, LMFT - Your Anxiety Toolkit | 10 Aug 2023 | 01:33:06 | |
On episode 21 of A Chat with Uma, I speak with Kimberley Quinlan, LMFT! Kimberley is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and public speaker who is the host of Your Anxiety Toolkit podcast, founder of CBT School, and owner of Kimberley Quinlan (A Marriage and Family Therapy Corporation) in Los Angeles, CA. She is passionate about the treatment of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and related disorders, Eating Disorders and Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors, and provides one-on-one treatment and online courses for those who are struggling in these areas. Advocating for those with mental health disorders is also a huge part of her life mission, and she serves as a global advocate for the International OCD Foundation. She is also the founder of CBTSchool, an online psychoeducation platform where she offers support and research-based educational products to those who cannot access correct care. CBTSchool offers low-cost online courses and FREE resources for OCD, anxiety and BFRB’s. She is also the best-selling author of 'The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD: Lean into Your Fear, Manage Difficult Emotions, and Focus On Recovery' (2021). In this episode, we discuss the following topics (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction of episode & Kimberley Quinlan, LMFT (00:04:35) How Kimberley became an OCD-specialized therapist (00:10:39) How Kimberley's lived experience with anxiety, eating disorders, and being a personal trainer led her to becoming a mental health therapist; Being an OCD therapist without having OCD (00:13:59): All about self-compassion
(00:30:22) About Kimberley's book: The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD: Lean into Your Fear, Manage Difficult Emotions, and Focus On Recovery' (2021) (00:40:57) How Kimberley has made evidence-based OCD treatment education widely accessible through CBT School (00:47:55) Discussion: does an OCD treatment provider need to have lived experience of OCD to provide the best therapeutic care? (00:53:39): Kimberley's experience with chronic illness & having a disability
(01:10:20): Navigating boundaries and finding balance in life
(01:20:03) Kimberley's experience as an Australian immigrant; Navigating the grief + anxiety of living across the world from her family (01:23:23) DEEP rapid-fire final questions with Kimberley, and closing out the episode! Connect with Kimberley:
Connect with me!
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| 20. OCD Conference Recap: Psychedelics, Genes, PTSD/Trauma, Brain Scans, & BIPOC Representation | 03 Aug 2023 | 01:32:40 | |
On episode 20 of A Chat with Uma, I recap my experience at the International OCD Foundation (IOCDF)'s 28th Annual OCD Conference & the 8th Annual IOCDF Research Symposium. I provide my key research takeaways from the perspective of an OCD neuroscientist & researcher with lived experience of OCD - about many important topics including psychedelics, ketamine, OCD genes, advanced epigenetic aging, comorbid OCD & PTSD + trauma, brain scans, and more. I share these research updates in accessible & digestible ways to continue bridging the gap between researchers & lived experience communities. I also share my many experiences and reflections from my presentations and advocacy at the conference. I speak about my experience as a BIPOC patient and the influence of my identity on the ways I showed up at the conference. I also speak at length about the intersection of my identities as a researcher, trainee, and OCD survivor + advocate and the myriad of ways that my identities came together at this conference. This episode provides a comprehensive space for reflection, integration, and research updates for not only conference attendees, but those who were unable to attend in person. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Hello, check-in, moving update (00:06:35) Introduction to episode
(00:09:08) Overview of OCD Con, IOCDF Research Symposium, & the unique nature + structure of this particular conference (00:20:46) Research Update: OCD Genes & Advanced Epigenetic Aging - Dr. Evelyn Stewart (00:28:24) Research Update: Ketamine Trials for OCD - Dr. Carolyn Rodriguez (00:38:41) Recap: Research Symposium poster presentation; Full-circle reflection of my growth as a researcher with lived experience; Beginning at OCD Con last year (00:46:34) Recap: BIPOC Community Support Group
(00:54:44) Recap: In My Shoes - Highlighting The Realities of the BIPOC & Cultural Road To Recovery
(00:58:32) Recap: Psychedelics & OCD - Discussing the Current State of Psychedelic Research as Potential OCD Treatments
(01:18:14) Recap + Update: OCD & Medication - Brain Scan Discussion
(01:23:27) Research Update: Comorbid OCD & PTSD + Trauma
(01:28:18) Final reflections, hopes, and future directions Connect with me!
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| 19. Disability Isn't A Dirty Word: The Realities of Being Disabled and Navigating Discrimination, Erasure, & Ableism | 27 Jul 2023 | 01:07:47 | |
On episode 19 of A Chat with Uma, I discuss my experience and history as a disabled person, in honor of Disability Pride Month. This is a raw episode, sharing my history with physical, psychiatric, and cognitive disabilities - both lifelong and more recently developed. I share my unfiltered experiences of discrimination, stigma, ableism, and the repercussions of these chronic experiences. I speak at length about the realities of disability justice (or lack thereof) and the need for true unlearning, advocacy, rebuilding, and action. This episode is meant to be a space of reflection, solidarity, validation, and honesty for those who live with disabilities and those who truly desire to advocate for & be an ally for disabled people. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & what inspired this episode
(00:08:03): Operational definition & discussion of what disabilities are (00:09:26): Overview of my physical disabilities & their effects; history of misdiagnosis, ableism, and unlearning (00:24:40): Overview of my psychiatric mental disabilities & their effects (00:33:14): Overview of my cognitive mental disabilities & their effects (00:39:14): The pervasive effects of ableism
(01:01:27): Calls to action for changes, talking about future & further advocacy Some Disability Resources & Advocates:
Connect with me!
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| 45. From Pro Athlete to Peer Support: Surviving a TBI, Men’s Mental Health, & Building Shareapy with Scott Kelsey | 23 Jun 2025 | 01:50:34 | |
On episode 45 of A Chat with Uma, I sit down with Scott Kelsey—mental health advocate, former pro-hockey player, fellow One Mind Lived Experience Council member, and founder + CEO of Shareapy, a platform dedicated to transforming mental health support through peer-driven connections. Scott opens up about his decades-long journey with anxiety & depression, unfolding during & after his five-season run in professional hockey during a time when “mental health” wasn’t spoken of. From mislabeling early symptoms as “just post-concussion stuff” to confronting depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and substance use, he shares what it took to finally acknowledge his mental health and start healing. A near-fatal brain injury in 2018 became the turning point that sparked sobriety, therapy, and ultimately, the creation of Shareapy—born from a realization that we all need easier, safer ways to feel truly seen, heard, and supported. What started as a simple experiment in peer connection is now a global community breaking stigma around mental health and wellness. This episode shares Scott’s profound story of transforming the pain of suffering in silence into a purpose rooted in vulnerability, connection, & helping others share their authentic selves. Scott Kelsey is the Founder & CEO of Shareapy. With over 20 years of leadership experience in the financial and mortgage sectors, he has a strong track record of driving innovation and growth. He is also a passionate advocate for reducing the stigma surrounding mental health. He has served on several nonprofit boards and is actively involved in mentoring emerging leaders. He’s a dedicated volunteer and often participates in initiatives aimed at improving community well-being. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & welcome to Scott Kelsey! (00:05:26) Early childhood: Gratitude, reflections, & growing up in the 70's with no mental health awareness (00:13:28) Finding hockey: following his inspiration in his big brother & progressing into college hockey (00:19:00) Signing pro hockey contracts, frequent transitions, & navigating his 5 season career (00:25:26) 1995 neuro-psych eval: mislabeling concussion symptoms vs. clinical anxiety & depression (00:33:14) Coping with booze, locker-room culture & “taking the edge off” (00:43:00) First full-blown panic attack, ER visit, pericarditis—and finally trying medication (00:52:30) Mortgage-industry rise, marriage, kids…and the slow burn of unmanaged mental load (01:02:00) April 7 2018: falling down the basement stairs, three brain hemorrhages & a second chance at life (01:10:00) A complete transformation: Immersing himself in therapy, sobriety, & peer support (01:18:00) “Why isn’t there an easier way to do this?” The founding origin story of Shareapy (01:22:00) Scaling Shareapy worldwide: the reality of founding a company, training facilitators, specialized affinity groups, & Men’s Mental Health Connect with Scott!
Connect with me!
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| 18. The Real OCD Chemical Imbalance: Glutamate, GABA, & Becoming An OCD Neuroscientist with Dr. Ana Maria De Souza | 20 Jul 2023 | 01:34:47 | |
On episode 18 of A Chat with Uma, I speak with Dr. Ana Maria De Souza! Ana Maria De Souza, Ph.D, is a Brazilian cognitive neuroscientist, who is passionate about bridging the gap between researchers, clinicians, and the public. She has completed an undergraduate degree and a Master's in Psychology in Brazil, and moved to the UK to pursue a Ph.D at the University of Cambridge with some of the most renowned OCD researchers in the world. She is committed to translating brain research into publicly available treatments for OCD and empowering individuals to make fully informed choices. In this episode, we discuss the following topics (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction of episode & Dr. Ana Maria De Souza (00:4:50): Dr. De Souza's lived experience with conditions and how that led her to become a neuropsychologist (00:13:18): How Dr. De Souza then pivoted from neuropsychology/clinical practice to cognitive neuroscience (00:19:00): How Dr. De Souza began studying OCD
(00:27:07): Dr. De Souza's operational definition and conceptualization of OCD as a neuropsychologist, cognitive neuroscientist, and researcher (important to listen to!) (00:34:23): The neuroscience of OCD, in the context of Dr. De Souza's research + work; Differentiating OCD from anxiety/anxiety disorders (00:43:44): Newest unpublished findings from Dr. De Souza's lab and research!
(00:56:08): Dr. De Souza & colleagues' newest (+ groundbreaking!) Nature paper on Glutamate + GABA chemical imbalances in OCD patients
(01:07:56): The critical importance of science communication and consuming research responsibly
(01:21:37): Limitations, caveats, and considerations around Dr. De Souza & colleagues' findings; limitations on research in general, at this time (01:25:44): DEEP rapid-fire final questions with Dr. De Souza, and closing out the episode! Connect with Dr. Ana Maria De Souza:
Connect with me!
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| 17. Psychedelic Science Recap: Research Updates, Biggest Takeaways, & The Intercollegiate Psychedelics Network | 13 Jul 2023 | 01:47:13 | |
On episode 17 of A Chat with Uma, I provide a full recap of my experience at the Psychedelic Science 2023 conference in Denver, hosted by the Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies (MAPS)! PS2023 was the world’s largest-EVER gathering focused on psychedelic research and medicine, with over 12,000 attendees from across the globe. This episode provides a recap of my experience at the conference, ranging from research updates, OCD advocacy and awareness, my presentation experiences, key takeaways from sessions, and general meta updates from the psychedelic science field. This robust episode goes deep into the human experience of not only this conference, but the full-circle experience of finding myself in this space, participating in this way. I also speak in depth about the Intercollegiate Psychedelics Network (IPN), the premier student and youth-led psychedelic organization, where we empower, develop, and connect the next generation of students & rising professionals in the psychedelic ecosystem. IPN provides high-impact and interdisciplinary programming geared toward professional development, mentorship, and accessibility for members worldwide, and I provide context on my involvement as co-director and how our work contributed to the PS 2023 conference. Finally, I share my reflections and resolutions for moving forward beyond this conference. Topics Discussed (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Intro:
(00:08:36): Background on my path to the psychedelic field + this conference
(00:27:22): All about the Intercollegiate Psychedelics Network (IPN)
(00:41:32): IPN's contribution to Psychedelic Science 2023
(00:49:28): RECAP: Psychedelic research funding from the NIH (& National Institute of Drug Abuse [NIDA]) (01:04:14): RECAP: Changing the paradigm of research collaboration vs. competition in psychedelic science; recommendations from experts (01:09:33): RECAP: Keynote from Dr. Andrew Huberman (Huberman Lab Podcast) - Shutting down animal work post psychedelic treatments; Contributions of students (01:19:26): RECAP: Launch of the Psychedelics & Pain Association (PPA); Psychedelics & Pain Symposium | July 15-16 (USE CODE 'umapod20' for 20% off tickets!) (01:27:21): RECAP: Updates from Yale Psilocybin & OCD trial(s) (01:31:59): RECAP: OCD advocacy & awareness through presenting my research (01:38:47): RECAP: IPN panel + mixer; Advocating for non-traditional + underrepresented students in the psychedelic ecosystem; Experiencing the next generation of the psychedelic field! Links mentioned in episode:
Connect with me!
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| 16. Running Towards Our Values: Faith, OCD, & Religious Scrupulosity with Reverend Katie O'Dunne | 29 Jun 2023 | 01:30:37 | |
On episode 16 of A Chat with Uma, I speak with Reverend Katie O'Dunne! Rev. Katie O'Dunne is the founder of Faith & Mental Health Integrative Services, an organization helping individuals with OCD and related disorders live into their faith traditions as they navigate evidence-based treatment. Prior to this, she spent 7 years serving as the Academy Chaplain and the Pauline and R.L. Brand Jr. '35 Chair of Religious Studies at Woodward Academy in Atlanta, Georgia. Katie is proud to be an IOCDF lead advocate, an ordained minister, and an endurance athlete tackling 50 ultra-marathons for OCD. She is currently pursuing her doctorate at Vanderbilt to continue her focus on faith & mental health. In this episode, we discuss the following topics (+ timestamps): (00:00:00) Intro:
(00:07:03): Introduction of Rev. Katie O'Dunne (00:15:46): Confessional + backstory of my initial fear of Katie due to religious trauma; Misconceptions about those who work in ministry (00:19:18): Deep dive into Katie's story:
(00:30:14): Doing unseen compulsions, accidentally "tricking" therapists, and being incorrectly treated by therapists who are not properly trained to treat OCD (00:36:08): How Katie got into interfaith chaplaincy and working with people of all faith/belief backgrounds (including identifying as agnostic, atheistic, etc.) (00:41:46): How OCD can latch onto religion, and working at the intersection of faith + OCD (00:43:58): Defining + explaining moral scrupulosity and religious scrupulosity, individually and as themes of OCD (00:56:07): How Katie created Faith & OCD initiatives for the International OCD Foundation (IOCDF Faith & OCD Resource Center) (00:58:10): Katie's doctoral work at Vanderbilt University, conceptualizing OCD treatment as a spiritual practice (01:05:33): Challenges and opportunities around mental health outreach + education for other clergy members (01:09:04): Where Katie is today in her own OCD recovery journey (01:13:55): How running ultra-marathons became a part of Katie's OCD recovery & advocacy journey; Running towards our values (01:19:00): All about Katie's upcoming projects:
(01:23:27): DEEP rapid-fire final questions with Katie, and closing out the episode! Connect with Katie:
Connect with me!
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| 15. The Great (Recovery) Reckoning: Graduation, Burnout, & The Truth About Transition | 20 Jun 2023 | 01:02:54 | |
On episode 15 of A Chat with Uma, I provide a full recap of the few weeks that I've (unexpectedly) been away from the podcast! This recap serves to fully & honestly reflect my true experiences with navigating graduation, closing out this chapter of my life, and transition - with no filters, whatsoever. I speak with radical honesty about the state of my recovery and well-being throughout this unexpectedly difficult time, and talk through all of the contributing factors that play into my experience. I share openly about my experience with dissociation and maladaptive coping mechanisms - namely excessive busyness - in the name of verbalizing this experience for anyone else navigating this as well. I share reflections, progress updates, opportunities for growth, and how I have attempted to engage in self-compassion. I also speak through the stuck-points and the conundrum of burnout amongst more fully living life and burnout from things that light us up. I close with updates about my life, upcoming experiencs and opportunities for growth, and a reclamation of honesty, self-compassion, and acceptance - for me, and for YOU. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction: Confessional, gratitude, where I've been & the fear + experience of coming back (00:11:23): Recap of finishing out my semester & labwork (00:20:16): Recap on graduation; The comfort of "sprinting through a marathon," and the fear of finishing (00:25:56): Navigating a parent's cancer treatment, dealing with the distress and overwhelm (00:30:52): Addiction to busyness and overworking as a coping mechanism; The concept of being burnt out from being so lit up (00:43:02): Experience in Miami with Biohaven: glimpses of recovery & presenting as a survivor for the first time (00:54:04): Next steps, what the immediate future looks like, opportunities for growth, what's coming! Connect with me!
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| 14. England Trip Recap: Recovery, Exposures, Presence, & Breaking Convention | 01 May 2023 | 01:11:16 | |
On episode 14 of A Chat with Uma, I provide a full recap of my recent trip to England! This recap serves to reflect pivotal experiences and realizations around the state of my overall recovery from decades of debilitation and dysfunction - namely mental and physical illnesses. I speak openly about navigating presence, dissociation, pain, triggers, stress, recovered moments, and everything in between. I then share at length about my experience of presenting at Breaking Convention and ALL that came from sharing my research and inadvertent OCD advocacy + awareness. Overall, this episode serves as an honest and thorough reflection on the reality + power of persisting in recovery, especially in sharing the life-changing moments that came from the exposure of this trip. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction to the episode (00:04:20): Neuroscience Research Seminar Presentation
(00:06:07): Guest + Topic Request Form (00:07:47): Introduction and background of the trip, the exposures I decided to face with this trip (00:22:06): Experiencing new-found, transient presence + flexibility during this trip (00:30:05): Navigating chronic pain, physical presence, and dissociation (00:38:56):Procrastination, avoidance, denial, triggers, therapy on the trip (00:44:03): Experience leading up to talk, navigating fears & intrusive thoughts, Source Research Foundation dinner, exposures through this process (00:49:10): My full Breaking Convention presentation recap + experience, all of the OCD advocacy + awareness, meeting my heroes, glimpses of presence, newfound freedom + purpose, the power of recovery, reflections Connect with me!
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| 13. My 27th Birthday... I Never Thought I'd Be Here. | 25 Apr 2023 | 01:01:10 | |
On episode 13 of A Chat with Uma, I reflect on my 27th birthday today. Recorded on my actual birthday, I share a live, raw, completely unedited account of everything coming up for me as I turn 27. I speak at length about the awe and gratitude I feel for being here + alive today, and reflect on how being alive for this long felt like a complete impossibility for much of my life. I talk through the rapid transformation of life that has ensued since cancer and all the recovery I have embarked upon, and how wildly different life looks than anything I could've ever expected, on all fronts. I speak candidly about my current state of being, including the full spectrum of emotions that come up with celebrating my birthday and my cancerversary in direct succession. I talk through examples of how meeting life with my authentic self has created so many experiences that I would've never thought to be even remotely possible. I share my experiences of exploring the duality of existence, the complete surprise of how life looks, and the awe of continuing to explore the continuum of experiences that life has to offer. Above all, this episode is a statement of love, gratitude, acceptance, and holding hope for every single beautiful human listening to this episode - especially through the darkest and most impossible moments that you may live through. Connect with me!
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| 12. What If I'm Dying?: The Intersection of Mental Health & Cancer | 17 Apr 2023 | 00:59:20 | |
On episode 12 of A Chat with Uma, inspired by my upcoming 4-year cancerversary and all that comes up this time of year - I share my full story + experience of my mental health struggles due to/influenced by my cancer. I discuss the research, conceptualization, and understanding of adverse mental health outcomes for patients with cancer & other life-threatening illnesses - particularly AYAs (adolescent + young adult patients, 15-39). I speak at length about my own experience living with cancer and mental health struggles, candidly sharing the concrete examples of how my OCD, anxiety, PTSD, depression, and more intersect with + are exacerbated by my cancer diagnosis. I dispel myths about "cancer victimhood," explaining the reality of cancer survivorship in tangible + accessible terms. I close with reflections about my cancer + mental health experience & my upcoming cancerversary, and provide a call to action + empowerment about sharing our true experiences in community with others - and allowing ourselves the chance to be truly seen + supported. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction to the episode, why I'm doing this episode, my upcoming 4-year cancerversary (00:06:09): Breaking Convention Presentation
(00:08:36): Digital CancerCon Presentation
(00:09:59): The full reality of facing one's mortality & living with cancer
(00:28:55): My own mental health & cancer experience
(00:45:05): Mental illness/dysfunction is NOT a choice
(00:55:00): My own reflections, my cancerversary, the duality of life & death around my cancerversary, closing the episode Connect with me!
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| 11. Living with Cancer: Misdiagnosis, Metastases, Cancerversaries, & the AYA Experience | 10 Apr 2023 | 01:24:42 | |
On episode 11 of A Chat with Uma, inspired by my upcoming 4-year cancerversary and all that comes up this time of year - I share my full story + experience of living with cancer since I was 22. I talk you through the 6 months of misdiagnosis that led up to my diagnosis the day after my birthday, and I take you through the tumultuous journey of treatment that was shaped by further negligence, misdiagnosis, and mistreatment. I share the consequences of my delayed treatment on my prognosis, and I explain the reality of living with cancer rather than being in remission. I speak at length about the unique struggles of living with cancer as an AYA (adolescent + young adult patient), and I draw awareness to the experience of survivorship beyond treatment that is often completely overlooked by those in an AYA's life. I close with reflections about my experience, and a call to action + empowerment about sharing our true experiences in community with others - and allowing ourselves the chance to be truly seen + supported. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction to the episode, why l'm doing this episode, my upcoming 4-year cancerversary, dedication of this episode (00:09:44): Aspiring Scientists Coalition Presentation with Dr. Ben Rein
(00:14:00): Breaking Convention Presentation
(00:17:05): Digital CancerCon Presentation
(00:19:58): Diagnosis & surgery
(00:42:56): Negligence, radiation, metastasis
(01:01:20): What my cancer looks like now
(01:07:31): The AYA cancer experience
(01:14:42): The reality of facing your mortality
(01:19:27): Closing out the episode, integrating and allowing all parts of you to exist Connect with me!
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| 10. My Next Chapter: Research, Advocacy, SciComm, & Becoming Myself | 03 Apr 2023 | 01:21:36 | |
On episode 10 of A Chat with Uma, I'm sharing everything about the next chapter of my life, which stems from one of the biggest life decisions I have made to date. I speak at length about the major decision I have made for the next step of my life + career, and narrate through the complexities and interplay of my beliefs, traumatic experiences, pathologies/mental illnesses, and distortions that contributed to my past confusion about my life path. I detail the process of integrating a pivotal psilocybin experience and the insights that provided integral support to my decision-making. I share the details of my next steps, how I got to this path, where exactly I will be going + what I will be doing, and how I will navigate the challenges & difficulties that may arise. I illustrate a tangible example of the illusion of "correct" choices, and share the role of acceptance and self-discovery in making values-driven decisions. This episode ultimately serves to share my raw and honest experience of moving through acceptance, curiosity, finding myself beyond what I "do," breaking through the binaries + limitations of others, and the process of becoming myself. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction to the episode (00:03:18) Aspiring Scientists Coalition meeting with Dr. Ben Rein
(00:07:39): Breaking Convention Presentation
(00:11:58) Announcing the major life decision I made! (00:14:38) How and why I made this decision
(00:30:06) How I'm moving from safety behaviors to this choice being an avenue to discover, accept, & become myself (00:46:45) Where I am going/moving for this next chapter + why (01:04:02) What I experienced there & how this place changed my perception of life (01:07:31) Breaking through the belief that I need to shrink + be either/or an advocate or scientist, and paving my own path to integrate all parts of myself (01:14:48) Where I'm going from here, gratitude for this podcast community, moving into my next chapter Connect with me!
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| 09. Brain Research 101: From Human to Molecule | 27 Mar 2023 | 01:20:00 | |
On episode 9 of A Chat with Uma, I provide a high-level overview of the full spectrum of brain science research. This episode serves as a primer to illustrate the spectrum of brain research that exists across psychology, neuroscience, psychiatry, and other related fields. This primer breaks down each level of research, its techniques, and jargon in an intuitive and accessible way, illustrating the advantages and limitations of each research approach and how they come together to comprehensively answer the questions we have about brains, mental/psychiatric illnesses, and consciousness. From observational human studies all the way to molecular analysis, this episode will teach you the basics of how brain research works across the spectrum of scientific study, from human to molecule. This easily digestible, accessible primer will equip you with the basic knowledge and skillset to begin effectively interacting with brain research that interests you across the full spectrum of fields, including: observational studies, clinical psychology, experimental psychology, cognitive psychology, psychiatry, clinical trials, cognitive neuroscience, neuroimaging, systems neuroscience, cellular neuroscience, molecular neuroscience, human-derived stem cell research, computational neuroscience, and more. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction to Brain Research 101 & the spectrum of research (00:05:46): My scientific background, biases, limitations; Disclosures & disclaimers Brain Research Spectrum: each includes explanation, techniques, examples, advantages, limitations, + description of experimenters (00:11:51) Observational research, naturalistic settings & within laboratories (humans) (00:18:14) Psychology research, psychiatry, clinical trials (humans) (00:24:48) Cognitive neuroscience, neuroimaging/brain scans (humans) (00:44:22) Pre-clinical research, neurobiology, animal models (00:46:45) Systems neuroscience, circuits (00:51:24) Cellular & molecular neuroscience, therapeutic targets (00:56:25) Human-derived stem cell models, brain organoids (00:59:58) Computational neuroscience, computational modeling (01:02:30) Variability in humans vs. preclinical research, experimenters in pre-clinical research (01:10:05) Full example of research question + how this question would be functionally answered across each part of the brain research spectrum discussed in this episode I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 44. MY LIFE IN 2025: Major Updates in Mental Health Research, Advocacy, Science Communication, & Leadership Roles | 16 Jun 2025 | 01:17:43 | |
On episode 44 of A Chat with Uma, I'm here for an (unexpected) solo episode to give you a full-length, 360° “State-of-the-Union” of my life for 2025. 2.5 years have flown by since my original intro episodes, and new listeners are still meeting a 2023 snapshot that’s quite outdated. Today I lay out—clearly and in one place—everything I’m doing now and why it matters: my neuroscience research, science communication, lived experience advocacy (plus the intersection of all 3), and my current leadership and service roles. I trace the through-line from my lived experience to every research question, keynote, grant review, and board seat, and I end with the mission that stitches it all together: shrink the treatment gap, save lives, and make myself obsolete. If you’re new, this is the ground-floor tour; if you’ve been here since episode 1, it’s the missing chapter that connects every choice I’ve made in the past several years! Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction and reason for today's episode (00:07:06) Road-map for this “State-of-the-Union” + core mission statement (00:15:24) My lived-experience backstory and WHY that drives every decision Contextual episodes:
Connect with me!
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| 08. Honesty Hour: The Duality of Recovery, Making "Right" Choices, & Trusting Yourself | 20 Mar 2023 | 01:33:49 | |
On episode 8 of A Chat with Uma, I share my first "Honesty Hour": a space where I share my raw, unfiltered, uncensored thoughts as I process the reality of life in real time. Honesty Hour episodes serve to create a space for us to allow the messy, confusing, and complex nature of experiencing life to live, rather than just sharing the insights and hindsight that come from sharing at the "other side" of experiencing; Instead, I hope to instead create an equally valuable & supportive space for moving through experiences. I share details about my current experiences around recovery, making crucial future decisions, crippling fear, the uncertainty of my values, the struggles of my bicultural identity, the declining health of my elderly parents, fear about not being able to recover my health, and more. This episode serves to normalize & unite us in accepting the nuance, complexity, and duality of the human condition that we all experience. Topics Covered + Timestamps: (00:00:00): Introduction to Honesty Hour, why I'm doing this episode (00:06:26): The duality of recovery, the fear of making "right" or "wrong" choices (00:09:50) Toxic gratitude + positivity, how I got to the point of the current life choices I face (00:32:40): Processing my upcoming life decisions
(00:45:00): Familial obligations & biculturality
(01:01:35): Contending with the state of my mental health
(01:23:00) Glass vs. plastic balls of responsibility
(01:25:54) Final reflections, self-compassion, accepting duality, allowing complexity, embracing uncertainty, and safe space for all of us to process I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 07. The Ketamine Diaries, Pt. 2: OCD, PTSD, Depression, & Chronic Pain | 06 Mar 2023 | 01:24:15 | |
In the Ketamine Diaries episodes, I share my full journey of clinical ketamine treatments for OCD, PTSD, depression, suicidality, and chronic pain. In this episode (part 2), I share every part of my experience from the very beginning of my ketamine treatments, through all of my stabilization and maintenance treatments thus far, the short and long-term effects, and everything that has led me to my present-day state, post-treatments. I detail every treatment experience from the physical, mental, and emotional perspectives, and speak in detail about the insights, challenges, and integrations that came with each trip. I provide reflections for how the immediate treatment experiences translated to long-term effects (or not). I share the nitty-gritty details of medical decisions I made that influenced the trajectory of my treatments, and explain the rationale behind these decisions from a research-informed standpoint. I finally share the results at this point of ketamine treatments for every diagnosis + symptom that I sought treatment for, and close with disclosing everything that has informed my decisions moving forward with continuing treatments. This episode provides a full, comprehensive, and multidisciplinary account of myself going through weeks of intensive ketamine treatments, and ultimately creates an honest and curious space for anyone thinking about pursuing ketamine treatments to explore their questions and concerns. Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Welcome, exciting life updates, intro to part 2, important disclaimers (00:05:31) Stabilization Day 1: Treatment setting, medication decisions (benzodiazepines/anxiety meds, nausea meds, pain meds, etc.), trip report, decisions moving forward (00:17:59) Stabilization Day 2: Medication decisions, trip report, trip insights (read verbatim) - distance between me and my symptoms/fears, virtual therapy (00:27:15) Stabilization Day 3: Trip report - realizing the suppression of my true self, orchids vs. dandelions, sea turtles; trip insights and integration (read verbatim), virtual therapy (00:46:32) Stabilization Days 4 & 5: Steep downturn, trip report - suicidality during the entire trip, how I dealt with the horrific experiences that day, trip insights and integration, virtual therapy (00:52:20) Time between stabilization & maintenance treatments: physical side effects of treatment, integration of trips, challenges, insights, awarenesses (01:04:10) Maintenance Day 1 & 2: summary of high-dose haze, extreme compounded physical side-effects, full report of integration and recovery (01:06:05) Everything that informed my decision about moving forward with treatments, reflections about clinic, effects on my chronic pain (01:09:10) Overall effects on my mental health (OCD, PTSD, depression, suicidality, etc.), lessons and reflections from treatments, where/how I am now, my treatment plans for the future, changes in my life I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 06. The Ketamine Diaries, Pt. 1: OCD, PTSD, Depression, & Chronic Pain | 27 Feb 2023 | 01:07:22 | |
In the Ketamine Diaries episodes, I share my full journey of clinical ketamine treatments for OCD, PTSD, depression, suicidality, and chronic pain. In this episode (part 1), I share every part of my experience from the decision to pursue ketamine treatments to the very beginning of my treatment experiences. I narrate the contexts surrounding my decision to engage in a clinical ketamine treatment protocol, detail the decision-making around the numerous important considerations, share a high-level overview of the research that informed my decision-making, the role of chronic pain in choosing this treatment protocol, and the different diagnoses that would possibly be affected by these treatments. I speak at length about the state of current ketamine clinics and loopholes to be wary of. This episode serves to provide full transparency around the experimental nature of considering clinical treatments for various indications from my various perspectives as a patient, psychonaut, and neuroscientist - and ultimately, this episode creates an honest and curious space for anyone thinking about pursuing ketamine treatments to explore their questions and concerns. Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Welcome, exciting life updates (00:05:35) Intro to episode, pre-frames, why I'm doing this episode, important disclaimers (00:10:04) Background, why I began considering ketamine treatments for mental health, hesitations (00:15:25) Why my chronic pain & dissociation was pivotal in ultimately deciding to pursue ketamine (00:20:46) The state of ketamine clinics & loopholes amongst the psychedelic renaissance (00:26:18) My past psychedelic experiences, why I didn't consider self-administration or clinical trials (00:33:47) Consideration & rationale of various aspects of clinical ketamine treatments:
(00:44:42) The variability and conflicting results of various ketamine studies, and how I considered this in my decisions (00:47:00) Deciding to move forward, all the considerations in planning treatment schedule (00:48:27) Ketamine treatments alone vs. ketamine-assisted therapy, subversive tactics used by clinics to claim mental health treatments, my stipulations for customizing treatment for maximum benefit (00:57:47) The ultimate uncertainty of experimental treatments, making the most informed choices possible amongst conflicting and ever-evolving information, accepting calculated risk (01:02:50) Conclusions, what's coming in part 2 of the Ketamine Diaries next week, thank you! I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 05. Yes, I've Done Psychedelics: From Psychonaut to Researcher | 20 Feb 2023 | 02:06:41 | |
In episode 5 of A Chat with Uma, I share my full journey of psychedelic experiences from 2019 to now. I share the contexts surrounding my various decisions to engage in psychedelic experiences, detail the decision-making around my thought processes, provide hindsight awarenesses of crucial contextual information that was missing during some of those experiences, and how I have implemented my awarenesses into my overall decisions around psychedelic use for both treatment and personal exploration purposes. I share the journey of how psychedelic experiences and lived experiences with conditions led me to pursue psychedelic research questions as a neuroscientist and graduate student. This episode continually challenges the stigma of self-disclosure of psychedelic experiences, addressing the harms of suppressing open discussion of experiences from those of varied identities & medical conditions - with an ultimate call-to-action encouraging the amplification of voices to reduce harm and increase targeted & informed research questions. This episode provides my full, uncensored, comprehensive journey with psychedelics, and closes with the implications of my personal AND clinical treatment experiences on my decisions moving forward. Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Welcome, podcast updates, upcoming events (00:09:25) Intro to episode, pre-frames, why I'm doing this episode, important disclaimers (00:25:21) 2019: Beginning psychedelic explorations, first experiences with DMT (00:45:25) Lifechanging DMT experience, metaphorical death (00:53:57) Direct excerpts read from DMT death experience, hindsight reflections, intersections with abusive therapist (01:10:05) 2020: Psilocybin experiences, unaddressed OCD effects, microdosing psilocybin (01:31:49) 2021: OCD relapse, starting proper treatment, break from psychedelics, context built around previous experiences (01:33:37) Importance of sharing our experiences for harm reduction & furthering research, how experiences informed my research personally (01:39:00) 2022: major depressive episode, microdosing psilocybin in a different context (01:44:17) My first MDMA experience, how it differed from my previous psychedelic experiences (01:50:00): End of 2022 to beginning of 2023: Overview of clinical ketamine treatments (01:54:11) Ketamine treatments: what worked, what didn't, facing suicidality, what I ultimately learned, my plan(s) moving forward with psychedelics (02:01:00) Ending reflections, summary, closing I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Referenced Links:
Connect with me!
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| 04. My Mental Health Journey: Part 3 | 13 Feb 2023 | 02:15:27 | |
In part 3 of this episode of A Chat with Uma, I share the third + final (for now!) part of my full + lifelong story with mental health. This part 2 episode serves to share my mental health journey from 23 to 26 (now), when I began working with an unethical and abusive therapist. This episode goes through my experiences with navigating unhealthy therapist dynamics, relentlessly seeking proper treatment for my conditions, the ways treatment has and has not worked, navigating my OCD and PTSD comorbidity, medication decisions, regaining more functionality, going through extensive psychological and cognitive assessments, and where I am now + where I am going. The diagnoses & conditions discussed include: OCD, major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, C-PTSD, panic disorder, suicidal ideation, PTSD, bulimia, dermatillomania, trichotillomania, neurodivergence, sensory processing disorder, and non-verbal learning disabilities. This episode series serves to provide a deeper context into my complex, nuanced, and lifelong journey with mental health, as most of my work as a neuroscientist, researcher, mental health peer specialist, advocate, educator, organizer, and podcaster all comes from this journey. To that end, I give a high-level overview of:
Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Intro, preframes, & disclaimers (00:06:03) 23: Relationship with abusive + unethical therapist (00:12:30) Going back to school, physical functionality vs. untreated mental illness (00:20:16) EMDR therapy for PTSD, how it didn't work because of OCD (00:31:21) Beginning treatment for the cult, religious & spiritual abuse (00:33:18) How + why I finally left my unethical therapist (00:43:14) 24: Pandemic waning, OCD relapse, how I learned about + sought proper treatment for the first time (00:56:31) Beginning proper OCD treatment, PTSD & OCD comorbidity, complications that arose from functionally dynamic relationship (01:14:00) Medication update + choices (01:23:48) Beginning with a new OCD therapist, seeking psychological testing (01:33:13) Depression, microdosing, dissonance between outward circumstances vs. internal suffering, losing hope (01:39:25) Psychological & cognitive testing, overview of all the results, rationality as a coping skill (02:01:00) Where I am now, where I'm going, lessons, reflections, take-aways, empowerment, and closing I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 03. My Mental Health Journey: Part 2 | 06 Feb 2023 | 01:10:36 | |
In part 2 of this episode of A Chat with Uma, I share the second part of my full + lifelong story with mental health. This part 2 episode serves to share my mental health journey from 18 to 23, when I began receiving more regular care, yet received many versions of misdiagnosis and incorrect treatment. This episode also provides context around how I received an OCD diagnosis, the mistreatment I experienced, and the beginnings of an unethical and abusive relationship with a therapist at 23. The diagnoses & conditions discussed include: OCD, major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, C-PTSD, panic disorder, suicidal ideation, PTSD, bulimia, dermatillomania, trichotillomania, neurodivergence, sensory processing disorder, and non-verbal learning disabilities. This episode series serves to provide a deeper context into my complex, nuanced, and lifelong journey with mental health, as most of my work as a neuroscientist, researcher, mental health peer specialist, advocate, educator, organizer, and podcaster all comes from this journey. To that end, I give a high-level overview of:
Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Intro, reframes, & disclaimers (00:08:32) ~18: Pre-law, transition to college (00:16:36) 18-20: College attempt 1, becoming more dysfunctional, OCD & failing classes (00:22:39) Therapist and psychiatrist experiences in college; 2 years of misdiagnosis and incorrect treatment; Medication issues (00:32:59) 20-21: Leaving college, starting music school, ineffective therapy, living with my partner, the experience that led me to recognize I may have OCD & seek out treatment (00:47:45) 21-22: Seeking treatment for OCD, receiving negligent and incorrect treatment, how OCD got worse, therapist red flags, contraindicated OCD treatment, leaving this therapist (00:54:32) 22-23: Cancer diagnosis, new therapist, PTSD diagnosis, navigating cancer treatment, rock bottom, unethical and abusive therapist relationship, incorrect treatment making OCD worse, not helping PTSD, seeking out EMDR (01:05:59) Closing, overview of part 3 coming next Monday! I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 02. My Mental Health Journey: Part 1 | 30 Jan 2023 | 00:58:04 | |
In part 1 of this episode of A Chat with Uma, I share the first part of my full + lifelong story with mental health. This episode serves to provide the context and story for part 1 of my journey - from birth to 18, before I received any level of consistent treatment by medical professionals. The diagnoses & conditions discussed include: OCD, major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, C-PTSD, panic disorder, suicidal ideation, PTSD, bulimia, dermatillomania, trichotillomania, neurodivergence, sensory processing disorder, and non-verbal learning disabilities. This episode series serves to provide a deeper context into my complex, nuanced, and lifelong journey with mental health, as most of my work as a neuroscientist, researcher, mental health peer specialist, advocate, educator, organizer, and podcaster all comes from this journey. To that end, I give a high-level overview of:
Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Introduction (00:01:00) Purpose of this episode, background, my intentions, and disclaimers (00:10:00) 0-12: Family background, culture, childhood symptoms
(00:25:30) 12-15: Middle school, (CW) sexual abuse, suicidal ideation, mental institution, joining the cult, starvation, dieting, developing bulimia, high school (00:48:31) 15-18: High school, medication, numbness, dissociation, therapy attempts (00:53:00) Reflections: lack of treatment vs. mistreatment, lack of diagnosis vs. misdiagnosis, neglect, abuse, closing out I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 01. My Full Story: 0 to 26 | 23 Jan 2023 | 01:38:31 | |
On this inaugural episode of A Chat with Uma, I begin the podcast by sharing my full story: a high-level overview of the overall journey that my life has taken so far, given my extremely non-traditional and rather eventful background. This episode serves as a basis and framework to understand the vantage point and perspective(s) that I'm coming from in this show. My story, told in full for the first time here, will give you insight into the questions I ask, the conversations I have, the topics I explore, and the depth of honesty that I navigate ideas with. Topics covered in this episode + timestamps: (00:00:00) Introduction (00:01:56) Purpose of episode, disclaimers, & pre-frames (00:09:12) Family background, childhood, mental & physical illness (00:25:00) Middle school, CW: sexual abuse, mental illness (00:32:25) Professional singing career (00:35:00) South Asian & bicultural identity (00:37:28) Joining a religious cult at 14 (00:43:20) High school, cult, poor grades, debate & law school, mental & physical illness cont. (00:49:00) College, failing, cult, dropping out, meeting my (now) husband (01:01:00) Cult hiatus, music school, OCD diagnosis, singer/songwriter career (01:03:25) Cancer diagnosis, losing my voice, psychedelics, losing my identity (01:11:20) Going back to school, redeeming myself, getting my degree, psychology to neuroscience, grad school, research (01:21:15) Leaving the religious cult fully, the cult of spirituality (01:26:05) Becoming a board-certified Mental Health Peer Specialist (01:28:50) Becoming an advocate and organizer (01:31:35) My future, what I'm doing and where I'm going next (01:36:00) The future of this show, closing of the episode I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 00. Trailer & Show Intro | 16 Jan 2023 | 00:06:20 | |
Welcome to A Chat With Uma! I'm Uma R. Chatterjee, a person holding many identities - a neuroscientist, researcher, board-certified Mental Health Peer Specialist (MHPS), mental health advocate, International OCD Foundation (IOCDF) Advocate, organizer, community builder, communicator... and most importantly, someone with vast lived experiences with mental health, chronic illness, young-adult cancer, and survivorship. On this show, I bring all of my identities together to bring you honest and unfiltered conversations exploring our true human experiences in their fullest form. Every week, I’m bringing you conversations bridging the gap on all things neuroscience, psychology, mental health, lived experience, advocacy, psychedelics, research, and more. We'll have conversations with scientists, clinicians, thought leaders advocates, humans with lived experience, creators, innovators, and truth tellers - speaking with people from all different identities and backgrounds to learn from their expertise AND explore how they themselves navigate their lives! This is a space for raw, unfiltered truth, to truly explore ourselves for who we are and how we are. We look at our TRUE, unfiltered, raw, human experiences with vulnerability, honesty, compassion, curiosity, and empowerment. We explore who we are, how we are, how we exist and show up in the world, how our experiences, identities, environments, and biology shape us; and we witness our resilience, empowerment, nuance, choice, and acceptance of ourselves and our realities. I cannot wait to connect with you, answer all of your questions, and co-create this with you. Welcome to a Chat with Uma! Connect with me!
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| 43. My Therapist Is Moving Across the World... What Happens To My Recovery? | 09 Jun 2025 | 01:11:52 | |
On episode 43 of A Chat with Uma, you have me for a solo episode where I share a huge life update that I'm living through in real time: after two solid years of showing me that recovery is actually possible, my therapist is moving across the world. Cue the whiplash of shock, grief, fear, and every intrusive “I-told-you-so” thought my OCD could cook up. In this episode, I walk you through the journey to and through here:
If you’ve ever lost a clinician, feared your progress would vanish, or just need someone to hold the gray with you—you're not alone. I’m processing this in real time, and so grateful to move through this with you. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps):
Connect with me!
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| 42. Hell on Earth: Surviving a Cult Exile, OCD, ADHD & Life-Threatening Illnesses with Alie Bernard Garza, LCSW | 02 Jun 2025 | 02:37:28 | |
On episode 42, I sit down with my dear friend, Alie Bernard Garza, LCSW—a therapist, advocate, & survivor whose life reads like an impossible novel: childhood autoimmune disease, undiagnosed OCD & ADHD, a high-control evangelical cult, multiple psychiatric hospitalizations, near-death medical crises, & eventually, a 38/40 Y-BOCS spiral that forced her into residential ERP. That would be more than enough for most lifetimes—yet in 2022, she suffered a near-fatal brain aneurysm that turned her worst health-OCD fears into terrifying reality. In this raw, unfiltered, & morbidly hilarious conversation, Alie tells the truth about what it's like to live inside a brain that won’t stop screaming—& how she finally found peace, purpose, & power on the other side. Alie Bernard Garza, LCSW, is a specialist in the treatment of OCD & anxiety-related disorders based in Denver, Colorado. She holds an MSW, has worked across all levels of care—IOP, PHP, residential, & inpatient, & is deeply committed to neurodivergent-affirming care, particularly for individuals with ADHD & Autism. Alie also specializes in supporting parents, families, adolescents, & young adults as they navigate complex mental health challenges. Through her own lived experience of severe OCD & advocacy, Alie brings both professional expertise & a deeply personal understanding to her work. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & welcome to Alie!
(02:05:09) Near-fatal brain aneurysm: when your worst health obsession becomes reality, and how OCD treatment saved her life (02:10:49) Launching OCD & Anxiety Colorado, neurodivergent-affirming family-inclusive IOPs, & creating the resources that she once needed Connect with Alie!
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| 41. Mapping The Bipolar Brain: Emerging Biomarkers, New Brain Regions, & Lived Experience in Research with Dr. Maya Schumer (pt. 2) | 26 May 2025 | 02:04:53 | |
On episode 41 of A Chat with Uma, we pick up right where we left off with Dr. Maya Schumer—a psychiatric neuroscientist who studies bipolar disorder, the very illness she lives with. In Part 2, Maya walks us through her PhD and Postdoc research thus far: the largest functional-MRI meta-analysis ever published at the time, 3 independent risk-cohort replications, and analyzing first-episode mania datasets. We dig into the honest reality of doing cutting-edge science while your brain is the very object of study—managing chronic suicidality, navigating disclosure, unlearning internalized (& reinforced) stigma, and redefining resilience beyond survival. Dr. Maya Schumer is a psychiatric neuroscientist & postdoctoral researcher who studies—& has lived experience with—Bipolar Disorder. Maya received her PhD in neuroscience from the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine in 2023 mentored by Dr. Mary Phillips, where she used task-based functional neuroimaging & coordinate-based meta-analysis to identify reproducible & replicable neural network markers of bipolar disorder risk. Currently, Maya is a postdoctoral fellow at McLean Hospital, an affiliate of Harvard Medical School. Mentored by Dr. Dost Öngür, Maya examines resting-state functional connectivity patterns & neural network dynamics across different stages & mood states in bipolar disorder, with an overall goal to model its dynamic nature. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Welcome back to Maya! Quick recap of Part 1 & why you need it for context! LISTEN HERE (00:09:20) How Maya survived a PhD while in hell: mentors, support, and scope-control (00:11:00) fMRI 101—bold signals, task vs. resting state, and default-mode rumination (00:14:58) The heterogeneity problem: why three decades of bipolar imaging rarely replicate (00:17:30) Building a 205-study meta-analysis & finding new network players in the neurobiology of bipolar disorder (00:24:46) The shocking shortage of mania/mixed-state scans—and why it matters for biomarkers (00:26:56) Young-adult risk cohorts & the 169-item Mood Spectrum Self-Report (00:29:54) Replicating mania- vs. depression-specific connectivity across three datasets (00:33:00) Maya’s postdoc research: first-episode mania, mixed states, & siblings at risk (00:41:36) Discovering a stigma-smashing research environment at McLean (00:44:24) From patient to PI: lining up K-award goals while battling urgency & perfectionism (00:59:00) Compliance vs. acceptance: managing stability without pathologizing every human feeling (01:05:50) Internalized ableism, masking mania, & the myth of “functional” bipolar (01:14:06) Time lost to our illnesses, managing the standards of academia, & recalibrating worth (01:20:00) When the work keeps you alive but the workload can kill you (01:38:00) How our illnesses are simultaneously sensationalized AND stigmatized (01:44:50) Final reflections: will to live, redefining resilience, & building a new future for our field Connect with Maya
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| 40. Why Is My Brain Trying To Kill Me?: Living With Bipolar 1 Disorder & Chronic Suicidality with Dr. Maya Schumer (pt. 1) | 19 May 2025 | 02:12:31 | |
On episode 40 of A Chat with Uma, I sit down with my dear friend Dr. Maya Schumer—a psychiatric neuroscientist who studies bipolar disorder, the very illness she lives with. She shares her full experience across 3 decades: growing up with a father with bipolar 1 disorder, how her own bipolar 2 diagnosis morphed into bipolar 1, several hospitalizations, her relationship with lithium, chronic suicidality, metabolic psychiatry, IV ketamine, TMS, & redefining "stability." If you've ever struggled with chronic suicidality, felt the weight of stigma in academia, or questioned what makes life worth holding onto—this conversation is for you. Maya’s story is one of survival, honesty, & the power of turning pain into purpose. Dr. Maya Schumer is a psychiatric neuroscientist & postdoctoral researcher who studies—& has lived experience with—Bipolar Disorder. Maya received her PhD in neuroscience from the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine in 2023, where she used task-based functional neuroimaging & coordinate-based meta-analysis to identify reproducible & replicable neural network markers of bipolar disorder risk. Currently, Maya is a postdoctoral fellow at McLean Hospital, an affiliate of Harvard Medical School. Mentored by Dr. Dost Öngür, Maya examines resting-state functional connectivity patterns & neural network dynamics across different stages & mood states in bipolar disorder, with an overall goal to model its dynamic nature. Maya’s passion for research is informed by her own lived experience. In her role as a researcher with lived experience, she aims to address & dismantle the stigma surrounding serious mental illnesses (SMIs), make academia & research environments more inclusive & accommodating for those with disabilities; & advocate for meaningful co-production between individuals with lived experience & scientists. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & welcome to Maya! Connect with Maya
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| 39. What If I’m A Murderer?: 29 Hospitalizations, Taboo OCD Themes, & the Recovery Lifestyle with Tracie Ibrahim, LMFT, CST | 12 May 2025 | 02:17:51 | |
On episode 39 of A Chat with Uma, I invite my dear friend Tracie Ibrahim, LMFT, CST to tell her full survivorship story of 29 psychiatric hospitalizations, misdiagnoses of schizophrenia & homicidality, childhood abuse, & a mental-health system that nearly killed her—until she learned the name of the monster (OCD) & fought back with exposure & response prevention. Tracie’s journey, like her, is messy, punk-rock, & heartbreakingly human, all at once: sneaking out of locked wards, filing her own writ of habeas corpus at 15, raising three kids while “raw-dogging” her mental health, & finally transforming the shame of harm, suicidal, & contamination OCD into a career as NOCD’s Chief Compliance Officer & the Instagram beacon “@TabooTracie." If you’ve ever felt defective, dangerous, or beyond help, this episode is a hug, a battle cry, & a masterclass in radical self-acceptance. Tracie Ibrahim, LMFT, CST, has 20+ years of experience in providing mental health services. Her specialization is treating OCD, anxiety & related disorders & depression, alongside a spectrum of issues affecting the LGBTQIA+ community, & issues with sexual health & functioning. Her expertise has been utilized to create high-quality programs addressing the increasing need for evidence-based counseling interventions. Currently serving as NOCD's Chief Compliance Officer, Tracie focuses on creating & implementing evidence-based treatment & compliance programs. Her passion for OCD treatment & advocacy work stems from managing her own OCD for 40+ years & raising children with OCD, anxiety, depression & neurodiversity. Topics Discussed (+ Timestamps): (00:00:00) Introduction & welcome to Tracie! (00:10:06) “Who is Tracie behind the titles?”—hover-mom, punk soul, universal acceptor (00:15:00) The first cracks: magical-thinking OCD at age 4, nightmares, divorce (00:20:00) Abuse, police indifference, & a 10-year-old’s first involuntary hold (00:26:00) Cutting, suicidal rituals, being considered homicidal, misdiagnosis of schizophrenia (00:31:00) Oppositional defiance label → transfer to county lockdown (00:37:00) Life inside Camarillo State Hospital with a roommate who’d murdered her family (00:43:30) Filing a writ of habeas corpus—& winning her own release at 15 (00:51:00) Surviving residential care, starting community college (00:56:30) Discovering ERP & real OCD on Google, self-experimenting with money exposures (01:03:00) Turning pain into purpose: training clinicians, supervising interns (01:10:30) From therapist to NOCD’s Chief Compliance Officer—scaling ethical care (01:19:00) TabooTracie is born: why she tackles pedophilia, harm & suicide themes online (01:24:00) Living proof: managing daily suicidal OCD while medication-resistant (01:30:40) Reconciling with grief, advocacy as turning pain into purpose, & raising children (01:37:50) The differences between pedophilia OCD vs. true pedophilia (01:46:30) The anatomy of intrusive thoughts, urges, and compulsions in plain language (01:52:00) Closing reflections, rapid-fire questions Connect with Tracie!
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