Explore every episode of the podcast 10% Happier with Dan Harris

Plus: why the vastness of the universe should make you feel bigger, not smaller; where the atoms in your body come from; and what Hollywood gets wrong about aliens

Neil deGrasse Tyson is an astrophysicist and the Frederick P. Rose Director of the Hayden Planetarium at the American Museum of Natural History, a post he's held since 1996. His newest book is Lost in Space: 5,000 Facts for Navigating the Universe.

Born and raised in New York City, he attended the Bronx High School of Science. He earned his B.A. in physics from Harvard, an M.A. in astronomy from the University of Texas at Austin, and both an M.Phil. and Ph.D. in astrophysics from Columbia.

He's authored eighteen books, hosted Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey (2014) and its sequel Cosmos: Possible Worlds (2020), and served as Executive Science Editor on the original Cosmos revival, which won four Emmy Awards. He created and hosts StarTalk — an NSF-funded program pairing celebrity guests with science conversation — which runs as both a podcast and a National Geographic TV series.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why knowing his calling at age nine shaped his happiness
• Why seeking discomfort and learning new things keeps you growing
• How to spot online "experts" who are really selling something
• Why the universe can make you feel bigger, not smaller
• Why most elements in your body were made inside stars
• How mirrors left by Apollo 11 track the moon's slow drift
• Why Hollywood's human-looking aliens make no scientific sense

Related Episodes:

• Neil's first appearance on the show

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How a 10-second pause can quiet the urge for more, why contentment comes through subtraction, not addition, and why a gratitude list alone can't fix the feeling.

As a fully empowered Dharma Teacher thru Spirit Rock/IMS, he has taught residential retreats at various centers and currently, leads Spirit Rock's Year to Live course. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why no moment ever feels quite good enough
• Whether you actually need all that wanting to get things done
• How to tell healthy desire from the compulsive kind
• Why getting what you want so rarely delivers
• Why "why am I like this?" might be the wrong question
• How to stop turning other people's joy into a story about you
• Why gratitude lists can still leave you reaching
• How to turn a wandering mind into a ticker tape parade
• Why we dodge the present moment like an old drug dealer
• The ten-second pause you can slip into almost anywhere
• The two-word rule for deciding what to say yes to
• A walking phrase that makes everything feel panoramic
• What to do with the sadness of remembering it all ends

Related Episodes:

• Frank Ostaseski, What Death Can Teach Us About Living

Additional Resources: 

• Vinny Ferraro's 

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Why "how am I feeling?" isn't always the right question, why resilience doesn't mean what you think it means, and how rituals can steady you.

Dr. Suzan Song is a Harvard- and Stanford-trained psychiatrist, humanitarian researcher, and adviser. For more than two decades, she has dedicated her work to building resilience in individuals and communities affected by adversity. She has a private practice in Washington D.C., is a professor of psychiatry at George Washington University, and is a sought-after speaker on the science of healing. Her new book is Why We Suffer and How We Heal: Using Narrative, Ritual, and Purpose to Flourish Through Life's Challenges.

In this episode we talk about:

• How a violent attack on her father shaped her life's work
• Why we recreate the painful situations we swore we'd avoid
• Why chasing stability causes so much of our suffering
• Three tools for hard times: narrative, ritual, and purpose
• How to spot and rewrite the scripts running our lives
• How people heal in countries with almost no therapists
• Why validation has to come before asking someone to change
• Why purpose is about being needed, not achieving more
• Why she thinks we've gotten "resilience" all wrong
  

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Additional Resources: 

• Run, Run Pure Beauty

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Buddhist advice on taking care of yourself so you can take care of the world, including what to do with your outrage, and why looking for the good on purpose isn't denial.

The news is painful right now. And for most of us, the options we reach for — doom-scrolling, rage-posting, or unplugging entirely — don't actually help. Meditation teacher and bestselling author Sharon Salzberg joins Dan to take live questions from the 10% with Dan Harris community on how to find solid ground when the world feels like it's on fire.

In this conversation, Sharon Salzberg and Dan Harris discuss:

• How to feel your anger without being consumed by it — and why that distinction matters
• What's usually hiding underneath the anger: grief, fear, and sadness
• Why action is the antidote to despair — and what actually counts as action
• How civil rights movement leaders sustained their effort in the face of uncertainty
• How to handle guilt about not doing enough
• Why "look for the helpers" is more than a platitude
• Whether meditation can possibly be relevant in a full-blown poly-crisis — Sharon's answer may surprise you
• Sharon Salzberg is one of the most influential meditation teachers in the Western world. She has been teaching for over four decades and is a co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, Massachusetts. She is the author of many books, including Lovingkindness and Real Happiness. Find more of her guided meditations in the 10% with Dan Harris app.

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Buddhist advice on the feeling of "I'm not enough," the voice that says "if I don't do it, no one will," and tolerating uncertainty without impatience.

Santacitta Bhikkhuni trained as a nun in England & Asia, primarily in the lineage of Ajahn Chah and has also received teachings in the Shechen lineage of Tibetan Buddhism. She is committed to Gaia as a living being and resides at Aloka Earth Room, currently in San Rafael, California. She recently co-authored the book What Are You Waiting For? A Conversation about Buddhism between Two Old Friends. You can find more of Ayya's teachings in audio & video format, as well as ongoing events in-person & online.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why self-improvement might be the wrong goal entirely
• The upside of having your heart broken
• Why patience isn't just for old ladies
• How to actually tolerate uncertainty
• The difference between reacting and responding
• What waiting in line can teach you
• The devotional practice missing from Western Buddhism
• What it means to become part of the Earth's immune system

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Winter is coming. The author of Wintering on weathering the cold, dark seasons, literally and otherwise, with rituals, cold-water swimming, reading in the middle of the night, and a lesson from a hibernating dormouse.

Katherine May is the New York Times bestselling author of Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times. She is an internationally renowned writer, podcaster and speaker whose work touches on nature, spirituality, slow living, and neurodivergence; her podcast is The Clearing. Katherine lives by the sea in Whitstable, UK, with her husband, son, and pets. 

In this episode we talk about:

• What "wintering" means, and why hard seasons aren't personal failures
• How trees and a hibernating dormouse model surviving the cold
• Katherine's year of cascading disasters while writing Wintering
• The difference between control and agency when the world feels overwhelming
• How fear spreads online like rabbits fleeing danger signals
• Why rest isn't selfish, and how caregivers are denied it
• Rejecting performative rest, ice-bath bros, and biohacked cold-water swimming
• Simple rituals, "first and second sleep," and reading through insomnia

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Plus: surviving cancer twice, what three divorces taught him, and being a Baptist who owns a bourbon company.

Terry Bradshaw is one of America's best-loved sports figures. As quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers, the Hall of Famer led his team to four Super Bowl victories. Since retiring from football, Bradshaw has become a celebrated sportscaster, actor, and entrepreneur. "Pappy" Bradshaw and his wife Tammy live in Texas near daughters Rachel, Lacey, and Erin, and their families. His new book is Looking for Terry: A Memoir.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why Terry spent years not knowing he had clinical depression
• The day he broke down sobbing on the field mid-game
• Why men resist asking for help, and what they do instead
• How his wife naming his depression "Roy" makes it more manageable
• His lifelong struggle to win his mother's approval
• What three divorces taught him about himself and marriage
• Squaring his Christian faith with owning a bourbon company
• Surviving two cancers in one year
• Loving life at 78

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We live as if we'll live forever, then die as if we've never lived. A Zen nun and MD on the daily practices that break that pattern.

Sister Dang Nghiem, MD, has a new book called Live Beautifully, Die Beautifully: Field Notes from the Edge of Impermanence.

Sister D was born in 1968 in Vietnam during the Tet Offensive, the daughter of a Vietnamese mother and an American soldier. She lost her mother at the age of twelve and immigrated to the United States at the age of seventeen with her brother. Living in various foster homes, she learned English and went on to earn a medical degree from the University of California – San Francisco. After suffering further tragedy and loss, she quit her practice as a doctor to travel to Plum Village monastery in France, founded by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh, where she was ordained a nun in 2000.

Sister D is the author of a memoir, Healing: A Woman's Journey from Doctor to Nun (2010); Mindfulness as Medicine: A Story of Healing and Spirit (2015); Flowers in the Dark: Reclaiming Your Power to Heal from Trauma with Mindfulness (2021); and The River In Me: Verses of Transformation, Collected Poems (2024).

In this episode we talk about:

• The Buddha's Five Daily Remembrances, and why you'd want to practice them
• Why our denial of aging and death causes far more suffering than aging or death
• How thanking your changing body can turn dread into gratitude
• Thich Nhat Hanh's wisdom of "the non-toothache moment" and hidden everyday happiness
• Treating despair and negative self-talk as small deaths we can release
• Why it's natural to fear death, and how to fear it less
• Why grief has no finish line, and the cost of rushing through it

Related Episodes:

• Buddhist Strategies for Reducing Everyday Addictions
• Your Negative, Ruminating Mind: Here's Your Way Out
• This Episode Will Make You Stronger
  

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Additional Resources: 

This episode is sponsored by:
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Plus: how to actually change a habit, how to get distance from negative thoughts, why the spark fades, and whether what doesn't kill you really makes you stronger.

Jonathan Haidt is a social psychologist at New York University's Stern School of Business and the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Anxious Generation.

He is also the author of the recently re-released The Happiness Hypothesis, and of The New York Times bestsellers The Righteous Mind, and The Coddling of the American Mind (with Greg Lukianoff). He has given four TED talks and been named a TIME100 Health leader.

In this episode we talk about:

• A two-word Stoic mantra that keeps you from suffering twice
• Why willpower alone won't change your habits, and what will
• Tricks for getting distance from negative thoughts
• Why the spark fades, and what actually makes love last
• Whether Buddhist non-attachment can be squared with loving your family
• The growing bipartisan backlash against smartphones, social media and AI
• Whether what doesn't kill you really makes you stronger
• Why ancient wisdom matters more in an age of uncertainty

Related Episodes:

• Jonathan Haidt's first appearance on the show

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Additional Resources: 

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Plan for the worst without spiraling, catch trouble early, and turn bad news into fuel.

Dr. Raj Panjabi, MD is the author of Safer: A Playbook—Turning Fear into Action and Crisis into Community. He served as Senior Director for Global Health Security and Biodefense at the White House National Security Council (2022-2023) where he co-led the largest vaccination campaign in history against COVID-19 and U.S. responses to other public health crises, including mpox, influenza and Ebola.

A Harvard Medical School physician, Dr. Panjabi is the co-founder and former CEO of Last Mile Health, which has trained thousands of community health workers to bring care to communities beyond the reach of any health system. One of TIME's 100 Most Influential People in the World and TIME's 50 Most Influential People in Healthcare, twice named to the FORTUNE World's 50 Greatest Leaders list, and to FORBES 250 Most Successful Immigrants, Raj has received the TED Prize, Clinton Global Citizen Award, and World Economic Forum's Social Entrepreneur of the Year award.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why denial is hardwired: the evolutionary roots of normalcy bias
• How pre-mortems and Stoic "premeditation of evils" calm the nervous system
• Setting triggers in advance to avoid both overreacting and underreacting
• Missing his infant daughter's heart failure, and what it taught him
• Fleeing Liberia's civil war
• The three circles of community
• Curiosity over control: asking "what's in the way?" instead of blaming
• Holding your purpose tightly and your plans loosely, especially in a disrupted economy
• Why to embrace uncertainty, and how to come out of it stronger

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Why it's OK to go to bed angry, be awkward, and not like your coworkers. Plus, the three kinds of friends you need and the one-line script that makes hard feedback land.

Adam Grant is an organizational psychologist at the Wharton School, where he has been the top-rated professor for seven straight years. His new book is Vibe: The Secrets of Strong Connections in a Lonely World.

Adam's books have sold millions of copies, he's one of TED's most popular speakers, and his podcast Re:Thinking has over 100 million downloads. He's been recognized as the world's second-most influential management thinker and one of Fortune's 40 Under 40.

In this episode we talk about:

• The four kinds of relationships, and which ones most people are missing
• How to stop replaying awkward conversations in your head
• Why men struggle to make friends
• Turning a pal into a companion, including the haunted house trick
• How to give feedback without putting people on the defensive
• Why "agree to disagree" keeps relationships from handling friction
• Why it's OK to go to bed angry
• Why great teams don't require liking your coworkers or daily office time

Related Episodes:

• Adam Grant on Perfectionism and Procrastination
• Adam Grant on the Science of Potential and Achievement
• Adam Grant on Languishing

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Additional Resources: 

• Hidden Potential
• Think Again
• Originals
• Give and Take

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Plus: the only two things you really take with you when you leave a job, why following a great boss beats chasing a hot company, and why she thinks "I've missed the boat" on AI is a lie.

Molly Graham is the host of TED's WorkLife podcast, co-founder of the leadership communities Glue Club and the Guild, and writer of Lessons on Substack.

In this episode we talk about:

• What a flock of starlings can teach you about your career
• Why not having a long-term plan might be your secret advantage
• How to navigate your career when you don't have a map
• Why joy at work might not be a luxury after all
• The simple calendar exercise that reveals what's quietly draining you
• Why being great at something doesn't mean you should keep doing it
• The career currency most of us chronically undervalue
• Why you should follow people instead of rocket ships
• How to spot a "LinkedIn crush" before it steers your next move
• The kind of fear that's actually a green light
• Why your calendar is a war zone of unfortunate yeses
• Molly's antidote to the doom narrative around AI at work
• Why it's not too late to get comfortable with AI

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This episode is sponsored by:
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A tongue-in-cheek jaw release, a 30-second shake-off, and a two-finger trick that tells your body it's safe. Plus: why scrolling feels relaxing but isn't.

Nadia Narain and Katia Narain Phillips are the authors of the international bestsellers Self-Care for The Real World and Rituals for Every Day. Their most recent book, Glimmers: Tiny Moments to Transform Your Life, was published in January 2026.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why staying calm all the time isn't actually the goal
• The sneaky state that masquerades as rest
• How to find glimmers in even the most ordinary moments
• Why glimmers turn out to be contagious
• The odd little trick for releasing tension you didn't know you carried
• What animals know about stress that we've forgotten
• How your field of vision talks to your nervous system
• Why your chores might be a secret meditation practice
• What rushing does to even the best of intentions
• Why leaving dishes in the sink can be a sign of progress
• The overlooked basics behind so much everyday stress
• Why rest isn't one-size-fits-all
• What it means to reparent yourself

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Why tensing against pain makes it worse, the difference between acceptance and passivity, and how to plan for the future while staying present—from two of Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh's senior students.  

Brother Thích Chân Pháp Dung is a Vietnamese American Buddhist monk ordained in 1998 and a Dharma Teacher in the Plum Village tradition, founded by Zen Master Thích Nhất Hạnh. He currently practices and teaches at Deer Park Monastery in California and is the founder of the Thích Nhất Hạnh School of Interbeing.

Kaira Jewel Lingo is a senior Dharma teacher in Thich Nhat Hanh's Plum Village Zen lineage who also teaches Vipassana in the Insight tradition. After 15 years as an ordained nun in Thich Nhat Hanh's monastic community, she now teaches internationally, integrating mindfulness with creative expression, social and racial justice, and care for the Earth. She is the author of We Were Made for These Times and co-author of Healing Our Way Home: Black Buddhist Teachings on Ancestors, Joy, and Liberation. You can also read Kaira Jewel's essays on Substack. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why we need to hear the same teachings over and over
• What it means to be alive while you're alive
• The hidden gifts of turning toward difficulty
• How to plan for the future without leaving the present
• The one sentence legendary teacher Thich Nhat Hanh said summed up all his teachings
• Where our true home really is
• How to accept things without becoming a doormat
• The difference between surrender and giving up
  

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This episode is sponsored by:

Northwest Registered Agent: Visit northwestregisteredagent.com/HappierFree and start using free resources to build something amazing.
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Tonal: Right now, Tonal is offering our listeners $200 off your Tonal purchase at tonal.com with promo code HAPPIER. 

Additional Resources: 

More offerings from Kaira Jewel:

• Beloved Community information (Monastery & Buddhist-Christian meetings)
• On-demand course with Sangha Live: Growing the Good, Cultivating Courage, Clarity and Care
• Insight Timer course: We Were Made For These Times: 10 Lessons In Moving Through Change, Loss & Disruption
  

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The liberation that comes from realizing that you're never going to get everything done.

Oliver Burkeman is the author of the Sunday Times bestselling Four Thousand Weeks, The Antidote, and most recently, Meditations for Mortals. His work has also appeared in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Psychologies and New Philosopher. He has a devoted following for his writing on productivity, mortality, the power of limits, and building a meaningful life in an age of bewilderment. 

This episode originally appeared in April 2024. 

In this episode we talk about:

• What the term "imperfectionism" means
• The illusion of reaching a point where "everything's done"
• Why there's liberation in seeing how finite we are 
• Why small, imperfect actions are more valuable than perfect plans
• Why overplanning is a kind of avoidance
• How to make decisions 
• The importance of finishing things
• Who you should develop a taste for problems
• Why effort doesn't always equal value
• Why we need to stop protecting other people's feelings
• And the paradox of mattering immensely and not at all

Related Episodes:

• The Power of Negative Thinking 
• Time Management for Mortals
  

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This episode is sponsored by:

BetterHelp: BetterHelp works with more than 125 health plan networks, and eligible members have an average copay of just $23 per session with insurance. Visit betterhelp.com/happier to explore your payment options.

Instant Hydration: For a better way to stay hydrated, go to instanthydration.com/10HAPPIER and use my promo code 10HAPPIER for over 40% off your first subscription order - it's Instant Hydration's best offer available.

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You don't get to choose what's thrown at you — only how you respond. Karma as a tool for agency, attention sovereignty as a political act, and what to do when you feel completely helpless.

The news is a lot right now. And for most of us, the usual options — doom scroll until midnight, or unplug entirely — don't actually help. Meditation teacher Pascal Auclair joins Dan for a live community conversation on how to stay engaged with what's happening in the world without letting it wreck your nervous system, your relationships, or your sleep.

In this conversation, Pascal Auclair and Dan Harris discuss:

• Why reading the news can be reframed as an act of love — and why that changes everything
• What Buddhism actually says about karma, and whether the bad guys get theirs
• How to balance staying informed with protecting your mental health
• The difference between passive equanimity and wise, engaged action
• How much news is too much — and why the answer is different for everyone
• Why attention itself has become a battleground, and how mindfulness is your best defense

Pascal Auclair has been immersed in Buddhist practice and study since 1997. He was mentored by Joseph Goldstein and Jack Kornfield at IMS and Spirit Rock, where he now teaches retreats. He is a co-founder of True North Insight and one of its Guiding Teachers. Find more of his guided meditations in the 10% with Dan Harris app.

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Which conflict style are you? Plus: avoiding the "trance of nice," walking the high wire, and an uber-hack for getting over irritation.

devon + nico hase serve as guiding teachers of the online dharma community Refuge of Belonging. They teach at the Insight Meditation Society, Spirit Rock, and other centers, offer online and in-person retreats, and speak with students in one-on-one sessions. They are the co-authors of How Not to Be a Hot Mess and the new This Messy, Gorgeous Love: A Buddhist Guide to Lasting Partnership. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why friction in relationships is a feature, not a bug
• The three directions of listening
• Why joy isn't a nice-to-have
• How contemplating death can dissolve everyday irritation
• Whether you're a volcano, a diplomat, or a dodger
• How to rupture like a pro
• Why real patience has teeth
• What it means to walk the high wire in a conflict

Related Episodes:

• The Sex Episode

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Six archetypes: Which one are you? Plus, a simple question to help you distinguish real, current fears from old, outdated ones.

Dr. Galit Atlas is an internationally renowned psychoanalyst and leader in relational psychoanalysis. She teaches at NYU and Columbia University and lectures internationally on sexuality, desire, and emotional inheritance. Her latest book is Come Closer. You can also read her essays on Substack, Wild Analysis with Dr. Galit Atlas.

In this episode we talk about:

• The six childhood archetypes that quietly run your adult relationships
• Why the version of you that felt too big or too small never actually grew up
• A simple question to ask yourself the moment old fear takes over
• The surprising link between blame and a feeling you'd rather not name
• What separates jealousy from envy — and why it matters more than you think
• The phrases people use when they're secretly telling you the opposite
• Why setting boundaries feels like betrayal if you were raised a certain way
• The real reason acceptance has to come before change, not after

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What kids can teach you about how to handle anger, being uptight, and rejection, according to the creator of Recess Therapy.

Julian Shapiro-Barnum is a comedian, writer, and interviewer known for Recess Therapy, Celebrity Substitute, and Outside Tonight. He's won seven Webby Awards, was named to the Forbes 30 Under 30, and received a Family Entertainment Award from Variety. His first book is How to Grow Up Without Becoming a Grown-Up.

In this episode we talk about:

• The playground question kids ask that adults are too scared to say out loud
• Why Julian stopped calling it your "inner child" — and what he calls it instead
• The trick for making feelings pass in minutes instead of weeks
• How breaking a rule on purpose can loosen something bigger in you
• The childhood habit that makes rejection sting so much less
• What growing up with five parents taught Julian about talking to anyone
• A tiny physical habit that can snowball into real change
• Why the most viral moment of his career wasn't about wisdom at all

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The famed exoneree on making life worth living every day, flipping the narrative on the bad things, and the ancient Japanese practice of kintsugi.

Amanda Knox is an exoneree, journalist, comedian, and bestselling author of Waiting to Be Heard and FREE: My Search for Meaning. She hosts the podcast Hard Knox and advocates for criminal justice reform and media ethics.

In this episode we talk about:

• The one question Amanda Knox asks herself whenever something bad happens
• Why understanding someone who wronged you can matter more than forgiving them
• What a centuries-old Japanese art form taught Amanda about coming back from being broken
• The mindset shift that got her through years in prison, one day at a time
• Why accepting your life exactly as it is might be the first step to changing it
• The hidden trap inside feeling like a victim
• Why other people's version of you was never actually yours to carry

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Additional Resources: 

• Amanda's Resilience series on Waking Up (plus her affiliate link).
• Dan's affiliate link for Waking Up.

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Plus: why being your 'best self' isn't about being nice or passive, why regulation starts before things go wrong, and how 'polyregulation' can help you up your game.

Marc Brackett, Ph.D. is the author of Dealing with Feeling: Use Your Emotions to Create the Life You Want and the bestselling Permission to Feel. He is the founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and a professor in the Child Study Center at Yale University. You can watch Marc's podcast interviews here. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why your "true self" might be the worst version of you
• The five-step process for catching yourself before you explode
• What to tell yourself in the doorway before you walk into a hard moment
• Why breathwork alone won't fix everything you're feeling
• The simple fix for total disengagement in your next Zoom meeting
• Why your best self should never be a doormat
• How to repair after you say the nastiest thing you've ever said
• How to build a go-to strategy before you even need it

Related Episodes:

•  The Science of Emotion Regulation: Strategies for When You're Anxious, Angry, or Comparing Yourself To Others | Marc Brackett

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Plus: Why acceptance isn't the same as resignation, a trick for gaining perspective, and the role faith plays in his life.

Josh Johnson is an Emmy-nominated writer, stand-up comedian, actor, and NAACP award-winner from Louisiana by way of Chicago. He was just named as the newest correspondent on Comedy Central's Emmy & Peabody Award-winning program The Daily Show, where he was previously a writer for the past six years. Johnson is also a former writer and performer on NBC's The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, where he made his late-night debut in 2017. In addition, he is Comedy Central's 'most watched comedian ever' with 40M+ views to date across their platforms. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The difference between accepting a problem and simply giving up
• Why some anxiety is a rational response, not overthinking
• How he manages anxiety while covering the news every day on The Daily Show
• A simple trick for judging whether something is actually worth your worry
• What it's like growing up in church (and questioning parts of it as an adult)
• Why he thinks comedy helps people face hard realities instead of avoiding them
• The habit behind posting a new hour of comedy every single week for three years
• Why he believes AI's promised breakthroughs haven't actually shown up
• Why he thinks the public still has power to reject where AI is headed
• The advice about finishing your work that changed how he creates

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A simple daily check-in you can do anywhere, a four-part practice for handling hard emotions, and a new way to relate to negative judgments. Plus, why transcendence is more accessible than you think.

Diana Winston is the Director of UCLA Mindful, with three decades of experience teaching mindfulness for health and well-being. She has authored three books, including The Little Book of Being, and has taught at Spirit Rock Meditation Center for 25 years. A founder of the International Mindfulness Teachers Association, she continues to guide individuals and organizations in cultivating awareness and presence.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why we keep making the same mistakes even after years of practice and therapy
• Four different ways to understand what "awakening" actually means
• A three-part check-in for resetting into the present moment
• A four-step practice for working with a difficult emotion in real time
• How judgment can become a doorway to deeper self-understanding
• Why self-compassion is the foundation of loving anyone else well
• How to access little tastes of transcendence in ordinary daily life

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A surprisingly uplifting conversation on aging, sickness, and death. Plus: why you get happier as you get older, hard-earned tips for handling tough diagnoses, and how to think about AI in your health care.

Atul Gawande, MD, MPH, is a surgeon, author, and public health innovator. He holds the Fish Chair in Surgery at Brigham and Women's Hospital. He is the Samuel O. Thier Professor of the Practice of Surgery at Harvard Medical School and Professor of the Practice at Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health. 

Dr. Gawande was Assistant Administrator for Global Health at USAID from 2022-2025. He is a longtime writer for The New Yorker and has written four books: Complications, Better, The Checklist Manifesto, and Being Mortal.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why the best doctors ask patients what matters before choosing treatment
• The simple question that reveals what makes life worth living
• Why patients who get less aggressive care sometimes live longer
• His father's answer to "what's worth living for" changed three times
• Why staying independent and staying safe often pull in different directions
• Research showing people get emotionally calmer, not sadder, as they age
• What happened when the U.S. shut down its global health aid programs
• Why he sees AI as a helpful second opinion, not a replacement, for doctors

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Additional Resources: 

• Being Mortal, the book
• Being Mortal, the documentary

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The legendary comedian says you don't have to be tortured to be an artist, he doesn't need an index card of achievements in his pocket anymore, and even the bad trips have led to good destinations.

Neal Brennan is a three-time Emmy-nominated writer, director, producer, and standup comedian known for his critically acclaimed Netflix specials 3 Mics, Blocks, and Crazy Good and for co-creating Comedy Central's iconic Chappelle's Show. He also hosts the hit Blocks podcast, where he talks with guests about their own personal blocks.

In this episode we talk about:

• Talking back to your inner critic
• Why the worst psychedelic trips might do more good than the beautiful ones
• The myth that comedians have to be miserable to be funny
• The "decoy" that keeps smart people chasing validation forever
• Why achievement became Neal's most embarrassing addiction
• What Neal wants now that success wasn't enough

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How to understand your tendencies and identify what's keeping you stuck. Plus: advice on treating resistance as data, reclaiming time affluence, and avoiding "procrasticlearing."

Laurie Santos is the Chandrika and Ranjan Tandon Professor of Psychology at Yale University. In addition to her work on the evolutionary origins of human cognition, Laurie is an expert on the science of happiness and the ways in which our minds lie to us about what makes us happy. Her podcast, The Happiness Lab, is a top-3 Apple podcast which has attracted 150+ million downloads since its launch.

Gretchen Rubin is one of today's most influential and thought-provoking observers of happiness and human nature. She's the author of many bestselling books, such as The Happiness Project, Better Than Before, The Four Tendencies, and Life in Five Senses which have sold millions of copies in more than thirty languages. Her most recent book is Secrets of Adulthood. She's also host of the popular podcast, Happier with Gretchen Rubin.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why your intuitions often make stuckness worse, not better
• The difference between mindless drift and mindful, deliberate delay
• How to treat resistance as useful data instead of laziness
• Kristin Neff's three-part framework for practicing real self-compassion
• Gretchen Rubin's Four Tendencies and how they shape what gets you unstuck
• Why clearing physical space creates a felt sense of agency
• The "liking gap" and why reaching out matters more than you think
• How to satisfice instead of optimize when a decision feels stuck

Related Episodes:

• Past appearances of Gretchen and Laurie

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Additional Resources: 

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Plus: the benefits of a "reverse bucket list"; clear formulas for happiness, enjoyment, satisfaction, and purpose; and how to engage in the world's problems without being miserable.

Professor and writer Arthur Brooks on his recent book (co-authored with Oprah Winfrey): Build The Life You Want: The Art and Science of Getting Happier. Arthur has seen the themes of this book play out in his own life. He started his career as a classical French horn player, then got his PhD in public policy analysis, and went on to run a think tank called the American Enterprise Institute. He is currently a professor at the Harvard Kennedy School and Harvard Business School. He also does work with The Atlantic, where he writes a column and hosts a podcast called How to Build a Happy Life. Arthur was formerly on Ten Percent Happier to discuss his book From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness, and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Myth busting about happiness
• The three macronutrients of happiness
• The perils of pursuing pleasure
• How to be effectively and wisely ambitious
• How to ascertain if you have meaning in your life
• How to manage your emotions
• The difference between healthy and unhealthy envy 

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A podcast pioneer on failure, resilience, luck, work/life balance, and the power of questions.

Guy Raz has been instrumental in creating some of the most iconic podcasts in the world, including Wondery's How I Built This, Wow in the World and TED Radio Hour. The New York Times has described him as "one of the most popular podcasters in history." 

We talk about:

• The challenge – and gift – of failure
• Getting comfortable with discomfort and risk
• The notion of luck 
• The balance between your relationships and your work 
• Why scale isn't always the answer 
• Success vs. happiness 
• And much more

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How the people, places, and things around you can bring out your best. Plus, why willpower is unreliable, why AA works for so many people, and where to put your phone. 

Angela Duckworth is the Rosa Lee and Egbert Chang Professor at the University of Pennsylvania and co-director of the Penn-Wharton Behavior Change for Good Initiative. She is the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance and the recently released Situated: Find the People and Places That Bring Out Your Best.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why willpower alone rarely creates lasting behavior change, and why changing your situation is often the better move
• The Gallup study showing where teens keep their phones predicts their grades
• How to identify what's actually within your control versus truly fixed
• Angela's own marriage crisis during the 2008 financial collapse, and what saved it
• Why "trying harder" can sometimes make a bad situation worse, not better
• One reason Alcoholics Anonymous works for so many people in recovery
• How reaching out to strangers for advice can change your entire career path
• Why surrounding yourself with the right peers matters more than we admit
  

Related Episodes:

• Angela Duckworth's first appearance on our show

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Additional Resources: 

• Angela's new book Situated

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There's a three-part framework for analyzing, breaking, or building any habit. There's also a simple way to identify which ones might be "keystone habits" for you. And the surprising discovery of the GLP1 "habit window" suggests that some people may be benefiting more from the drugs than others.

Charles Duhigg is a Pulitzer prize-winning journalist and the author of The Power of Habit, which spent over three years on bestseller lists and has been translated into 40 languages; Supercommunicators, also a bestseller published in 2024; and Smarter Faster Better, a third bestseller. Mr. Duhigg writes for The New Yorker magazine and is a graduate of Yale University and the Harvard Business School. He previously wrote for The New York Times, and is a frequent contributor to CNBC, This American Life, NPR, and Frontline. He was also, for one terrifying day in 1999, a bike messenger in San Francisco.

In this episode we talk about:

• The cue-routine-reward framework that underlies every habit, good or bad
• The "golden rule" of habit change
• What "keystone habits" are and how to identify them in your own life
• Charles's 45-pound weight loss on a GLP-1 and what it revealed about "food noise"
• The GLP-1 "habit window," and why some people may benefit from GLP-1's more than others
• Kitchen-sinking: the habit where a fight about one thing becomes a fight about everything
• Meta-conversations: asking your partner what they actually need before you respond

Related Episodes:

• The Science of Effective Communication | Charles Duhigg
• Weighing The Extraordinary Benefits And Disturbing Risks Of The New Weight Loss Drugs | Johann Hari

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Additional Resources: 

• The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg
• Supercommunicators by Charles Duhigg

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Plus: her complicated relationship with antidepressants, weathering fertility struggles, and aging in public.

Sara Bareilles joins Dan to discuss her new album Good Grief, a record she made after losing three close friends — Chad Joseph, Gavin Creel, and poet Andrea Gibson. The conversation covers grief as a transformative force, medication and mental health, fertility struggles and miscarriage, the creative process as spiritual transmission, aging without intervention, and patriotism as grief. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Grief is a shortcut to the truth — it strips away distraction and forces presence
• "Name it to tame it" — putting feelings into words reduces their power
• Sara's fear that medication would suppress her artistry turned out to be the opposite: Lexapro felt like "a return to herself"
• The creative process as clearing a channel rather than owning the output — music arrives, it isn't manufactured
• "Nothing to fix" — acceptance as a countercultural act in an era of optimization
• Acceptance isn't resignation — you can surrender to what is and still take compassionate action
• Grief of country: loving America and mourning what it's becoming aren't mutually exclusive
• Social media distorts your experience of reality — have your experience of the world in the world

Sara Bareilles is a two-time Grammy winner and Tony-nominated composer whose music and lyrics powered the Broadway hit Waitress — a role she later performed herself, both on Broadway and in London's West End. On screen, she earned an Emmy nomination for Girls5eva and for her performance as Mary Magdalene in NBC's Jesus Christ Superstar Live! She has sold over three million albums and 3.5 billion streams worldwide.

Related Episodes:

• Sara Bareilles: Anxiety, Anger and Art (2021)
• How To Find Joy In an Anxious World (Sara Bareilles and Dacher Keltner, 2025)

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Additional Resources: 

Check out Sara Bareilles' website, including links to her new album Good Grief, and more info about the Good Grief documentary. 

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Will AI take our jobs? Kill us? This episode provides both fact-checking and a psychological survival guide.

Cal Newport is a Professor of Computer Science at Georgetown University, where he is also a founding faculty member of the Center for Digital Ethics and the inaugural Director of the Computer Science, Ethics and Society academic program. He is the New York Times bestselling author of eight books, including, most recently, Slow Productivity, A World Without Email, Digital Minimalism, and Deep Work. Newport is also a long-time contributing writer for the New Yorker and the host of the Deep Questions podcast.

Matthew Brensilver, MSW, PhD teaches retreats at the Insight Retreat Center, Spirit Rock Meditation Center and Insight Meditation Society. Before committing to teach meditation full-time, he spent years doing research on addiction pharmacotherapy at the UCLA Center for Behavioral and Addiction Medicine. Each winter and summer, he offers a four-month online Buddhist Psychology Training through Spirit Rock integrating Buddhist wisdom with modern psychotherapy. Matthew is the co-author of two books about meditation during adolescence and continues to be interested in the unfolding dialogue between Buddhism and science.

In this episode we talk about:

• What really happened when an AI agent hacked a company while running a test
• Why one Silicon Valley belief system may be fueling AI panic more than the tech itself
• Why senior programmers are quietly going back to writing code by hand
• Where Cal draws the line on using AI to help you write versus write for you
• Why Matthew worries AI could quietly replace the ordinary, unfinished parts of daily life
• Buddhist advice on being with this unprecedented moment
• How stabilizing your mind makes acceptance possible, and how to do it
• Why calming the sense of emergency doesn't erase uncertainty, but makes it easier to face

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Insights from the places on the planet where people apparently live the longest and healthiest lives. 

Dan Buettner is an explorer, National Geographic Fellow, and journalist. He has written a series of bestselling books, including The Blue Zones of Happiness and The Blue Zones Kitchen: 100 Recipes for Living to 100. He is also the host of the Netflix show, Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones.

In this episode we talk about:

• The origin story of the Blue Zones
• The nine common denominators, or Power Nine, to longevity.
• The surprising information about much maligned foods such as pasta and bread
• Why trying to pursue good health can actually work against you
• Why the single most important factor in longevity isn't advertised on instagram 
• Tips for integrating Blue Zones wisdom into your daily life, including designing a life where you move more naturally
• And some of the critiques and controversies surrounding his work

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Additional Resources: 

• Link to Buettner's collaborators' response on demographics: https://academic.oup.com/gerontologist/article/65/12/gnaf246/8381533?login=false
• Saul Newman's critique of Blue Zones methodology:
  https://www.biorxiv.org/content/10.1101/704080v3

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An investigative journalist on why reincarnation, ghosts, and unexplained phenomena deserve more scrutiny; plus, why our need to believe in something bigger isn't something to be embarrassed about.

Miguel Sancho is an Emmy Award–winning television producer and author. He is a veteran of ABC News, where he helped run 20/20, and he is now the executive producer of The Proof Is Out There on the History Channel. His latest book is Evidence of the Extraordinary: Discoveries from the Series The Proof is Out There.

In this episode we talk about:

• How to walk the line between skepticism and credulity
• Why most UFO footage falls apart under scrutiny
• The scientific case for Bigfoot
• Why kids who remember past lives are hard to dismiss
• How to spot a fraudulent psychic
• Pascal's "God-shaped hole"
• What unexplained ancient rock structures reveal about our history

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Plus: Why you're a "mystic" even though you don't know it, how to find the "magic" in meditation, and the power of simple apologies (and cleaning the dishes).

Susan Piver is a 30 year student of Tibetan Buddhism, New York Times bestselling author, and founder of The Open Heart Project, an online meditation community with close to 20,000 members. Her latest book is Inexplicable Magic: Meditation for Mystics. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why meditation's real payoff can't be explained
• The crucial difference between mindfulness and awareness
• Why you can't think your way into oneness
• The seven daily habits of a modern "mystic"
• Why boundaries are essential to a spiritual life
• Susan's unglamorous trick for building real confidence
• Why trying to fix yourself backfires
• The secret to attracting inspiration
  

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Why the five stages of grief are a myth, a go-to phrase for when everything's falling apart, and three steps for getting through loss.

Dr. Lucy Hone is an adjunct fellow at the University of Canterbury and a sought-after professional speaker, a bestselling author, and an award-winning internationally published science educator. She is regularly featured in international media, including in The Guardian, Hidden Brain, and The Washington Post. Dr. Hone is a columnist for Psychology Today.

In this episode we talk about:

• A three-step recipe for getting through any major loss
• Why the five stages of grief are a myth
• The surprising research on who supports grievers best (hint: pets)
• Living losses vs. death losses — and why ranking grief doesn't help
• What it means to have your "assumptive world" shattered
• Rebuilding identity after loss: answering "who am I now?"
• Finding self-compassion through "real, not perfect," not perfectionism

Related Episodes:

• Cody Delistraty
• Sloane Crosley
• Sam Sanders

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Additional Resources: 

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Writing can reduce overthinking, rumination, and anxiety. Here's what the researcher who pioneered the science suggests.

James Pennebaker is Professor Emeritus of Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. He is known for his early research on expressive writing and health. More recently, he has pioneered ways to study people's personalities and behaviors through the analysis of their language use. His text analysis program LIWC is used across disciplines. Author of over 300 scientific articles and 8 books, his research has affected our understanding and treatment of mental and physical health of people dealing with upheavals in their lives.

This episode first aired in November 2024, and is co-hosted by Dr. Bianca Harris.

In this episode we talk about:

• The specific form of journaling, called expressive writing or therapeutic journaling, that
  he invented and studied.
• Other kinds of journaling such as to-do lists and gratitude lists.
• Why writing things down helps shift our perspective on our stress or trauma.
• How that can lead to a cascade of benefits, from improved sleep to improved working memory
• And why Pennebaker, who's a very laid-back dude, is so laid-back about how often we need to journal in order to derive its benefits

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How elite athletes use visualization to improve performance, why visualization can turbo-charge physical recovery, and the mental trick that can make your nervous system feel safe.

Cassi Vieten, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and director of research at the Arthur C. Clarke Center for Human Imagination at the University of California, San Diego, where she also directs the Center for Mindfulness. She is the author Imagine That: Transform How You Think, Feel, and Live with the Science of Imagination.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why imagination is the oldest human technology
• The VISTA method for training your imagination
• Why manifestation isn't as crazy as it sounds
• How to talk yourself out of catastrophizing
• Why conflict is really a clash of two imaginations
• What glimmers are
• How to use imagination to dial down physical pain
• What years of hidden alcoholism taught Cassi about a narrowed imagination

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Ben Rein, PhD is a neuroscientist who studies the biology of social behavior and explains the brain to an audience of over 1.2 million people online. He serves as Chief Science Officer of the Mind Science Foundation, Head of Science Communication at ResearchHub Foundation, and teaches at Stanford University. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Distinguishing between science and online "neurobullshit"
• Three research-backed ways to protect your brain health and boost social connection, even for introverts
• Why isolation shows up in the body like a low-grade injury
• The real difference between loneliness and isolation, and why we rarely recognize either in ourselves
• The power of pets in reducing stress and inflammation
• Whether sugar is really more addictive than cocaine (short answer: no, and here's why)
  

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Additional Resources: 

• Why Brains Need Friends: The Neuroscience of Social Connection

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Dan doesn't usually sit in the interviewee's chair — but when journalist and author Allison Gilbert invited him to speak at the 92nd Street Y as part of their Connected Lives series, he said yes. What followed was one of the more wide-ranging conversations Dan has had about his own practice, his own anxieties, and why he's become convinced that inner work divorced from relationships is just selfishness dressed up as self-care. The evening also included a guided loving-kindness meditation — metta practice — that Dan led live with the audience.

They talked about:

• Why Dan thinks the meditation world's PR problem has shifted — it's no longer "this is weird hippie stuff," it's "I get it, but I personally can't do it"
• The upward spiral: how taking care of your mind improves your relationships, which improves your inner weather, which improves your relationships further — and the "toilet vortex" that runs in the opposite direction
• Free-range mindfulness: why brushing your teeth or standing in a grocery line can rewire your brain just like formal seated practice
• The self-compassion toolkit — Kristin Neff's three-step practice, distanced self-talk, and why putting your hand on your heart is "cheesy as f*ck" but actually works
• Joseph Goldstein's single best question for breaking an anxiety loop: "Is this useful?"
• Why micro-interactions — with your doorman, your barista, a stranger on the elevator — are one of the most underrated sources of happiness

Allison Gilbert is a journalist, author, and the creator of The Joy of Connections, a book and companion app designed to help people build more meaningful relationships. She writes and speaks about human connection, grief, and resilience. Learn more at allisongilbert.com.

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Additional Resources: 

• Check out Allison's new app at beingmoreconnected.com

This episode is sponsored by:
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How to calm down fast with an 'inventory' practice, how to build 'resources' you can call on anytime, and why 'healing' might be the wrong goal to chase. Plus, living with autoimmune disorder, writing as a practice of embodiment, and why white-knuckling isn't worth it.

Johanna Franzel is a teacher, somatic practitioner, educator, and author of the new book Write Yourself Home: A Creative Guide for Living Well in the Body You Have Through Embodied Writing and Movement Practice. She brings both professional expertise and the lived experience of navigating chronic illness for more than two decades. She also writes a Substack called Permission Slips. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why your nervous system stays on high alert for threats that aren't actually there
• The three-step "inventory" practice for finding calm in your body, right now
• Why calling to mind a "resource" can genuinely shift your physiology
• "Presence without scrutiny": the difference between being with someone (or yourself) and staring them down
• Why Johanna doesn't love the word "healing" and the word she prefers instead
• How to turn your most embarrassing memories into material, not shame
• Why the way you talk to yourself matters more than you think
• What over two decades with Crohn's disease taught Johanna about self-advocacy and knowing your own margins
  

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Plus: how to build a village, why your attachment style isn't your destiny, and a two-step method for asking for help that actually works.

Nedra Glover Tawwab is a licensed therapist and the author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace, an instant New York Times best-seller translated into over 35 languages worldwide. In addition, she has authored seven other books, including Drama Free and, most recently, The Balancing Act. A sought-after relationship expert, she has practiced relationship therapy for almost 20 years.

In this episode we talk about:

• The difference between healthy dependency and full-blown enmeshment
• Why your attachment style is useful information, not a life sentence
• Wise compassion versus what Buddhists call "idiot compassion" 
• Why you can't force someone else to change, but your own change might be contagious
• The "silent agreements" we make in relationships without ever saying them out loud — and how they quietly build resentment
• Why over-considering everyone else's needs backfires, and how to actually advocate for your own
• How to stop dragging old relationship trauma into brand-new relationships
• What to actually do if you feel lonely, or like you don't have enough friends

Related Episodes:

• How to Handle Family Drama | Nedra Glover Tawwab
• That Rut You're In – This One Word Could Pull You Out | Nedra Tawwab

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Join Dan, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18. Grab your in-person spot here, or sign up to livestream here!

This episode is sponsored by:
Tonal: Get $200 off your Tonal purchase with promo code HAPPIER at tonal.com.
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Plus: The "hard yes" list, the intentional pursuit of being bad at things (and how that opens doors you didn't know were closed), being "on intimate terms with catastrophe," and optimism as a daily practice. From How To Be A Better Human.

Today we're sharing an episode from another show we love: How to Be a Better Human, hosted by Chris Duffy. In this conversation, Chris talks with actor Yara Shahidi — known for Black-ish and Grown-ish, and now host of The Optimist Project podcast — about what she's learned from building a career and an identity at the same time. Yara explains why she thinks of optimism as a daily practice rather than a fixed personality trait, how a "year of no" eventually led her to build a "hard yes list" of things that reliably bring her joy, and why she's been deliberately pursuing things she's bad at — cartwheels, crochet, the glockenspiel — as a way of staying curious and connected.

It's a thoughtful conversation about purpose, identity, and how to keep growing once you've already achieved the thing you thought you wanted. If you like what you hear, check out How to Be a Better Human wherever you get your podcasts.

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Join Dan, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18. Grab your in-person spot here, or sign up to livestream here! 

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The legendary dharma teacher on self-acceptance, the two-sentence trick she uses on her own anger, and what actually makes her happy after 90 years of living.

Sylvia Boorstein, PhD, LCSW is a co-founding teacher of Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Woodacre California and the author of five books on Buddhism, Mindfulness, and particularly That's Funny, You Don't Look Buddhist: On Being a Faithful Jew and a Passionate Buddhist. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why turning 90 makes the Buddha's teachings on impermanence feel real instead of theoretical
• The line Sylvia repeats to herself that's become the antidote to ill will and anger
• Why "there's always a hand to hold" might be the whole point of being alive
• The four (or three) noble truths, reworked in Sylvia's own words
• A grocery store treat that turned into an unexpected lesson about where happiness actually comes from
• What she says to people who are dying, and why it's not a lie
• And much more
  

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An MIT/Harvard negotiation expert on the two types of "no," the FBI hostage negotiator trick you can use with anyone, and the rhetorical move that improves outcomes for women.

John Richardson teaches negotiation at MIT's Sloan School of Management, and previously at Harvard Law, and was an associate at the Harvard Negotiation Project. He was coauthor with Roger Fisher and Alan Sharp of Getting It Done and Negotiation Analysis with Howard Raiffa and David Metcalfe. He is also a graduate of the Massachusetts Firefighting Academy. His latest book is Never Settle, co-written with Attia Qureshi.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why lying in a negotiation is tactically stupid, not just morally wrong
• The "give them a sandwich" trick FBI hostage negotiators use, and how to steal it for everyday life
• The difference between healthy manipulation and the harmful kind
• A simple word that can pull someone's brain out of fight-or-flight mode mid-argument
• Why knowing your alternative matters more than knowing your ask
• When saying no is actually the smartest move in the room
• And much more
  

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Move on from the inner critic and beat perfectionism without lowering your standards.

Dr. Ellen Hendriksen is a clinical psychologist who helps people calm their anxiety and be their authentic self. She serves on the faculty at Boston University's Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders (CARD) and is the author of HOW TO BE ENOUGH: Self-Acceptance for Self-Critics and Perfectionists and HOW TO BE YOURSELF: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety. You can find her on Substack at How to Be Good to Yourself When You're Hard on Yourself. This episode originally aired in 2025. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The relationship between perfectionism and anxiety
• The definition of perfectionism––and why the word is actually a misnomer
• Dr. Hendriksen's own struggles with perfectionism, and how they manifested physically
• The difference between healthy perfectionism and unhealthy perfectionism
• Changing your relationship with your inner critic 
• Shifting from rigid rules to flexibility
• Keeping high standards while making room for mistakes
• Overcoming procrastination
• Navigating social comparison
• And much more
  

Related Episodes:

• Strategies for Social Anxiety | Ellen Hendriksen
• The Voice in Your Head | Ethan Kross 
• How To Move Into The Future With Optimism Instead Of Anxiety | Frederik Pferdt

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Join Dan, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18. Grab your in-person spot here, or sign up to livestream here!

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Plus: How your envy can be useful, why you're an unreliable narrator of your own life, and why you keep choosing partners who echo the unfinished business of your childhood.

Lori Gottlieb is a psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, which has sold over three million copies and has been translated into over 30 languages. In addition to her clinical practice, she writes The New York Times "Ask the Therapist" advice column and is co-host of the popular "Dear Therapists" podcast and the advice podcast Since You Asked. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why insight alone doesn't change anything, and what "idiot compassion" gets wrong
• Whether you actually need to like your therapist
• Why there's no such thing as a hierarchy of pain
• How to spot a help-rejecting complainer, including in yourself
• What envy is actually trying to tell you
• Why a real boundary is a bid for connection, not a cutoff
• Why we're all unreliable narrators, and how to edit the story you tell about yourself
• Why we keep choosing partners who echo our unfinished business

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Additional Resources: 

• Maybe You Should Talk To Someone Workbook
• Maybe You Should Talk To Someone Journal

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18. Grab your in-person spot here, or sign up to livestream here!

This episode is sponsored by:
Function Health: Join at functionhealth.com/happier or use the gift code HAPPIER25 for a $25 credit toward your membership.

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Why optimization is a joy blocker, how to find the 'yes' inside the 'no,' and why that restless ache you can't shake is actually your compass.

Kate Bowler, PhD is a four-time New York Times bestselling author, award-winning podcast host, and an Associate Professor of American Religious History at Duke University. She studies the cultural stories we tell ourselves about success, suffering, and whether (or not) we're capable of change. Her newest book is Joyful, Anyway.

In this episode we talk about:

• The dangerous difference between joy and happiness
• Why optimization and self-mastery are quietly killing your capacity for delight
• How to find the "yes" inside every "no" (even when things are genuinely terrible)
• The ache and restlessness you can't shake—and why it's actually your compass, not a problem to solve
• What grace actually looks like when control disappears
• How to stop trying to improve your way into joy
• The "assignment" that changes how you show up for other people
• Why survival isn't the point—living is

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Additional Resources: 

• Everything Happens for a Reason (and Other Lies I've Loved) 
• No Cure For Being Human (and Other Truths I Need to Hear)
• Have a Beautiful, Terrible Day!

Join Dan, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren for Meditation Party, a 3-day immersive retreat at the Omega Institute in Rhinebeck, NY, October 16–18. Grab your in-person spot here, or sign up to livestream here!

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What a fake guru discovered about genuine connection, why ancient wisdom survives even the most rigorous skepticism, and the real reason humans crave spiritual authority.

Vikram Gandhi is an award-winning and boundary-pushing director of fiction and non-fiction film and television. Vikram most recently co-directed The Man Will Burn — a five-part HBO Original Documentary Series on the full arc of Burning Man, from its countercultural roots in San Francisco to the 80,000-person desert event it's become.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why an experiment built to reject capitalism ended up swimming in it
• What playing a fake guru taught him about how belief actually works
• Why people are often more comfortable opening up to a stranger than to those closest to them
• What religion, cryptocurrency, and Burning Man all have in common
• How to find meaning in ancient wisdom without needing to belong to anything
• And much more

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This episode is sponsored by: 
Jiyu Skin: Our listeners can now get an additional 20% off plus free shipping with our code HAPPIER at jiyuskin.com.
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Simple practices for not believing everything you think, becoming less reactive, and handling whatever life throws at you.

Joseph Goldstein is a cofounder of the Insight Meditation Society and the Barre Center for Buddhist Studies, both in Barre, Massachusetts. He is the author of many books including, most recently, Dreamscapes of the Mind. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why your thoughts have so much power over you — and how to take it back
• A surprisingly funny technique for dealing with self-judgment
• Why trying to get rid of an unwanted thought often makes it worse
• The difference between recognizing an emotion and actually being mindful of it
• Why sadness and unhappiness aren't the same thing
• And much more

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