“Be nice, be kind, share, smile, try to be as pretty as possible and don’t possibly age... This is how we’ve been trained.” – Michelle Minnikin, Psychologist & Author
"When did ‘nice’ ever get us a pay rise?" – Jo Phillips, The Woman Behind The Women
In this episode of The Chat Womb, Jo Phillips is joined by Michelle Minnikin, psychologist, coach, and author of Good Girl Deprogramming, to dismantle the covert rules and expectations that keep women small.
From childhood, women are conditioned to be agreeable, seek approval, and play by the rules, but where does that leave us? Michelle breaks down how society’s invisible coercive control keeps women in line, why so many women feel stuck in their careers, and—most importantly—how to break free from the ‘Good Girl’ mould and reclaim your power.
If you’ve ever felt pressured to play nice, stay quiet, or make yourself smaller, this episode is for you.
Episode Highlights
(02:10) – Introducing Michelle Minnikin: Psychologist, coach & author of Good Girl Deprogramming
(05:00) – The cult of ‘Good Girl Conditioning’—how women are programmed to comply
(07:15) – What society really teaches women: Approval = Worth
(12:30) – The workplace was built for men—how women lose confidence when they enter it (20:10) – The self-worth crisis: Why women lose belief in their own success
(25:00) – How to find your tribe and build a support system that lifts you up
(30:45) – The #1 thing every woman needs to unlearn: Being ‘nice’
(35:20) – Michelle’s advice to her younger self: Be less nice. You don’t need to be liked to succeed.
About Our Guest: Michelle Minnikin
Michelle Minnikin is a psychologist, coach, and author of . With a background in organisational psychology, Michelle helps women unlearn the societal expectations that hold them back and rebuild their confidence, boundaries, and self-worth.