Growing up in St Kitts & Nevis, Alexander Hayden never questioned whether he was gay because, as he explains, “I didn’t know the closet existed.”
In this episode of Queer Talker, Alexander shares what it was like growing up in the Caribbean, where same-sex relationships were illegal, moving to boarding school in the UK, and slowly discovering who he really was.
We talk about code-switching between two versions of himself, the emotional moment he returned home after the law changed, living with a visible difference, and why representation matters for LGBTQ+ people growing up in countries where acceptance is still a work in progress.
Alexander also takes us behind the scenes of I Kissed A Boy, reveals what it was really like arriving as the final bombshell, reflects on the show’s cancellation, and explains how the experience changed his life.
This is an honest conversation about identity, confidence, belonging and learning that you don’t have to hide who you are.
Chapters
00:00 Introduction and Queer Panic
04:58 Growing up in the Caribbean and cultural identity
07:02 Discovering the queer community and first experiences
10:11 Coming out and self-acceptance journey
14:55 Decriminalization in Nevis and returning home
16:59 Using platform to support Caribbean LGBTQ+ communities
20:46 Dealing with visible differences and confidence
24:56 Joining 'I Kissed a Boy' and show experience
29:51 Lessons learned from the show and personal growth
36:00 Advice to younger self and LGBTQ+ community
Connect with Ben Cicchetti:
Website - https://www.queertalker.com
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