Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast Heal from Infidelity: Reclaiming Your Peace, Power, and Self-Trust After Betrayal
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| A New Look at Forgiveness with Dara McKinley | Ep #154 | 06 Sep 2024 | 00:46:14 | |
In this episode, Andrea welcomes forgiveness expert Dara McKinley to explore the profound and transformative power of forgiveness. Dara shares her personal journey and professional insights into how forgiveness can liberate us from emotional burdens, helping us to heal and move forward. They discuss the misconceptions about forgiveness, the difference between forgiving and pardoning, and the role of unconditional love. Dara also provides practical advice on how to approach forgiveness, even in the most challenging circumstances, and emphasizes that everyone is inherently capable of this healing process.
Dara McKinley has studied and worked in the realm of spirituality and health for over three decades. In 2012, difficult life circumstances pointed her to forgiveness where she realized that many spoke prolifically about why one should forgive but no one spoke of how. Her background enabled her to successfully create and follow a forgiveness path that worked, but in the years that followed, the experience made her see some significant themes. In particular, she saw how mainstream forgiveness understanding (pardoning, ceasing anger, having compassion, and letting go) was obscuring the forgiveness path. She also saw that people who identified as spiritual-but-not-religious required a forgiveness path that was clear, and logical. This inspired Dara to devote her professional life to understanding forgiveness’ infrastructure and to making forgiveness the practical healing modality it was always meant to be.
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| Spiritual Bypassing | Ep #153 | 30 Aug 2024 | 00:32:48 | |
Today, Andrea dives into the complex issue of spiritual bypassing. She discusses how individuals often use spiritual practices as a way to avoid facing the real issues at the heart of infidelity. Through real-life examples and personal anecdotes, Andrea explains why it's crucial to address the root causes of betrayal rather than masking them with temporary solutions. She also highlights the importance of facing uncomfortable emotions and the potential negative impacts of spiritual bypassing, such as emotional confusion and codependency. Tune in to learn how to confront these challenges head-on and grow into a more authentic and confident version of yourself.
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| Types of Affairs | Ep #144 | 14 Jun 2024 | 00:38:24 | |
For most people, any kind of infidelity or affair is quite a life-changing blow, but the reality is that not all affairs are the same.
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| The Cost of Indecision | Ep #55 | 20 Aug 2021 | 00:30:20 | |
Can you think of a decision you are putting off? Most of us aren’t very good at making decisions. We get in our own way by second-guessing ourselves, doubting our ability to decide, and worry about getting it wrong. In this episode we’ll be diving in to why we drag out decision making, and look at how much it is costing you to put it off. There are many seemingly good reasons we put decisions off, but it always comes at a price to ourselves. You’ll also learn about how to make decisions quickly, and how to support yourself after the decision has been made so you can move forward. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Influence vs. Control | Ep #54 | 13 Aug 2021 | 00:22:12 | |
We all like to know how things will turn out. Our brains crave certainty, and because of this we often believe that if we can control things, we can dictate how they will turn out. But there is a better way, especially when it comes to trying to control other people. We can influence others by how we show up around them, and it is far more powerful (and likely to get us the results we actually want) than trying to control them. In this episode, we’ll talk about the difference (sometimes subtle) between control and influence, and how to tell how you are showing up for those around you. You’ll understand why influence is so much more powerful than control, and how you can become a more influential person in all of your relationships. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Understanding Infidelity with Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife | Ep #53 | 06 Aug 2021 | 00:48:23 | |
This week I am joined by Jennifer Finlayson-Fife to discuss the intricacies of infidelity. There are many misconceptions surrounding infidelity, and those misconceptions can keep you stuck. In this episode, we take a closer look at how infidelity can be the catalyst for growth in both parties, why people engage in infidelity, and how to recover from it. Dr. Jennifer Finlayson-Fife is an LDS relationship and sexuality coach as well as a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor in the state of Illinois. She has a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology. Her teaching and coaching focus on helping LDS individuals and couples achieve greater satisfaction and passion in their emotional and sexual relationships. In addition to consultation with couples and individuals (in-person and online), she teaches online relationship and sexuality courses designed to foster self and sexual development and create happier relationships and individuals. Dr. Finlayson-Fife also offers many live workshops and retreats for couples and individuals. Jennifer is a frequent guest on LDS-themed podcasts and writes articles for LDS-themed blogs and magazines, on the subjects of sexuality, relationships, mental health, and faith. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| When to Leave a Marriage | Ep #52 | 30 Jul 2021 | 00:25:44 | |
In this episode, I share my thoughts on when it may be time to consider ending a marriage. Although in truth we can leave a marriage whenever we want, there are a few specific questions to evaluate within yourself and your spouse that will ultimately serve you in the future after the decision is made. While divorce can be a very hard thing to consider, let alone go through with, if one leaves for reasons they feel solid about, it sets them up for healing and a positive outcome on the other side of divorce. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Knowing Yourself | Ep #51 | 24 Jul 2021 | 00:23:26 | |
Do you know who you are? When is the last time you answered that question? Most of us go through life thinking that who we are is what others define us to be. Knowing ourselves is the most important work we will ever do. The more we learn who we are, both strengths and weaknesses, the more we are able to accept all of us and challenge ourselves to grow. This in turn allows us to show up in relationships the way we want to, not the way we feel pressured to or expected to. Listen to this episode to learn more about why it is crucial to know yourself, and how to get to know yourself better. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Finding Safety in Your Body with Sariah Bastian | Ep #50 | 16 Jul 2021 | 00:57:19 | |
Most of us don’t know how to feel. We find all kinds of creative ways to block our emotions, mostly because we weren’t taught how to feel, or were shut down when we did express a feeling. In this episode, guest Sariah Bastian will share her story of going from years of unhealthy marriages and being cut off from herself to becoming an expert in finding safety inside her own body. Sariah is a betrayal trauma expert, as well as a master yoga instructor. With over 15,000 hours of instruction helping women heal, she has learned many important truths about healing that she will share in this episode. Don’t miss it! I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Attachment Theory | Ep #49 | 09 Jul 2021 | 00:36:57 | |
We all deal with problems in different ways, but attachment theory can shed some light on why you do the things you do, and why infidelity has affected you in the way that it has. In this episode, you’ll learn what attachment theory is and the three different types of attachment. You’ll also learn how to develop into the kind of attachment that will help you show up in your intimate relationships the way you want to and that will have the most impact. Most of all, you’ll learn how to have compassion for where you are, and an understanding of how you can help yourself feel more secure and safely attached. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Abundance vs Scarcity | Ep #48 | 02 Jul 2021 | 00:32:02 | |
If you listen to podcasts and read self-help books, you have probably heard the terms “abundance mindset” and “scarcity mindset.” However, in this episode I will be talking about each of those things and how they pertain to you and your life. There are four areas where we experience abundance and scarcity (time, money, relationships and health). When we learn how to experience abundance in one area, it often trickles to the others. It is a way of being and thinking. When you understand what kind of mindset you are coming from and what you can do about it, suddenly possibilities open up to you that you thought were just for other people. You learn to create the life you want rather than “taking what you can get.” Listen to this episode to gauge where your mind is, how to identify if you are in abundance or scarcity, and how to create more abundance into your life. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Navigating Changing Relationships | Ep #47 | 25 Jun 2021 | 00:22:09 | |
To truly move forward from infidelity, internal changes need to be made. When we change on the inside, it becomes impossible to be the same as we were on the outside. It is very possible that our changes become uncomfortable for others to be around, which can make us second guess ourselves and our growth. In this episode, you’ll hear about 3 different clients and how I helped them navigate the changes they experienced in their families, whether they chose to stay married or not. Understanding how our own changes can be uncomfortable for others helps us grow our own tolerance for their discomfort. We stop trying to make others feel better at our own expense. We understand that it is ok for them to be wrong about us, and let go of the painful assumptions we may be carrying about what others think. Allowing for changes in relationships is part of moving forward. Listen to learn how to navigate those changes with more grace, compassion for self and others, and resolve to let others see you. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| The Gift of Pain | Ep #46 | 18 Jun 2021 | 00:26:58 | |
Most of us don't look forward to pain. We often resist it, run away from it, or go into painful experiences with dread and fear. In this episode, I’ll shed some light on how our most painful moments can become the most useful, and even sacred experiences we draw from. Whether it is emotional or physical pain, we can use the power of our minds to not only help us manage our pain, but to make it a powerful experience for us. Although pain is a part of the human condition, seeing it through the lens of something useful and resilience-building can make it almost sweet. Listen to understand how you can use your current pain to serve you in your life. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Lessons from a Renovation | Ep #143 | 31 May 2024 | 00:24:43 | |
Join me this week as I share a personal experience of taking on a major project. You’ll hear some of the obstacles that made me want to quit, and the reasons why I kept going.
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| Letting Go of the “How” | Ep #45 | 11 Jun 2021 | 00:27:30 | |
As humans, we love certainty. We want to know all the details of exactly how things are going to transpire. Because we are not always privy to that information, we tend to talk ourselves out of goals, desires and dreams. What if the “how” is none of our business? Are you willing to release yourself from needing to know all the details? In this episode, you’ll learn why letting go of the how will open you up to the magic that happens when we decide we want something and go for it. You’ll learn 3 concrete steps that will give you strength and courage to run towards the things you want, even if you don’t know how you’ll get there. Needing to know how is just a stumbling block, keeping you from the life you want most. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Your Future Self | Ep #44 | 04 Jun 2021 | 00:27:27 | |
It makes perfect sense that our brains scan for things we know. But it can be very misleading. All the best things are in front of us. When we look to the past, we miss out on the opportunity to create the life we want. We have so much capacity to grow, to become, to create. But if we don’t know how to envision it and go after it, we fall back into old patterns. In this episode, I will teach you how to tap into possibility. Every human has unlimited potential that can not be quantified, measured, or capped out. Listen to understand how to tune into yourself and where you are meant to go. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Regret | Ep #43 | 28 May 2021 | 00:18:21 | |
Regret is an emotion that we all feel, but that we will do almost anything to avoid. The fear of regret can keep us stalled out, not taking the actions that will create the life we want. In this episode, you’ll learn why you don’t need to be afraid of regret. You’ll understand how regret can be both useful and harmful, and how to leverage it for your good. When we stop fearing emotions, we are willing to take bold actions, knowing that we will be able to handle whatever comes. If you want to move forward in your life without fear of regret, or want to learn how to let go of past regrets, be sure to listen to this episode. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Self-Esteem | Ep #42 | 21 May 2021 | 00:23:39 | |
Who are you? What do you think of yourself? When is the last time you really asked yourself those questions? Where do you go for the answers? Your own thoughts or what you think others believe of you? Most of us look outside ourselves to determine our self-esteem and self worth. It then becomes a moving target - as long as people tell us what we want to hear we’re ok, but when they stop, then what? In this episode, you’ll learn some concrete practices and exercises that will help you develop your own sense of self. There is nothing more important to work on than this as what we believe about ourselves sets the stage for everything we allow and don’t allow in our lives. Don’t miss this episode! I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| What I Know | Ep #41 | 14 May 2021 | 00:22:24 | |
When life throws us unexpected trials and curve balls, it can be easy to slip into doubt and fear. We can forget the hard-won lessons we have learned, become overwhelmed and lose sight of who we are and where we are going. In this episode, I’ll share five things that I know for sure. These five things have helped me throughout my life to navigate those times where everything seems upside-down. My five truths have reminded me what matters, and encouraged me to keep going, no matter how desperate I may feel in the moment. My hope is that my five truths will help you remember the things you know for sure. Those things can become the anchors that you live by - your constants that never fail you. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Victim Mentality | Ep #40 | 07 May 2021 | 00:29:29 | |
Do you ever cringe when you hear that someone is being “such a victim”? We often carry such harsh judgement around this way of being, although most of us slip into it throughout our lives. In this episode, I’ll explain what victim mentality really is and all the various ways it shows up. It can be sneaky and seem very justified, but in letting it stick around can cause all kinds of unnecessary pain and suffering. While many of us have been victimized at some point in our lives, we can use the feelings we experienced then to re-create suffering now. It pretends to be useful and true, but is hurting you more than anyone. Tune in to see if you sometimes experience victim mentality, and learn how you can get yourself back to the powerful person you are. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Values | Ep #39 | 30 Apr 2021 | 00:24:09 | |
Do you know what your values are or why they matter? We often hear of companies having values but skim over the importance of knowing and living by our own. In this episode, we’re going to dive in to what values are and how they can help guide decisions, know what to say yes and no to, and set parameters around where you will let your mind wander to. Knowing your values is crucial as you create a future you love. It becomes bigger than you - you are part of a vision. Listen, to understand how to identify what your values are and how they can help you move forward from infidelity. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Clean Pain, Dirty Pain | Ep #38 | 23 Apr 2021 | 00:15:41 | |
Pain is a natural part of life. We all experience loss, grief, and transitions. Suffering, however, is optional. In this episode you’ll learn the difference between the natural pain that comes with life events, and suffering that comes from our thoughts about those events. A great predictor of the experience of one’s life is how well they learn to manage their mind around their circumstances. The more the mind is kept in check, the more peaceful life will be. In this episode, you’ll have an understanding of what kinds of suffering we cause ourselves, why we do it, and how to clean up your thinking to have a more peaceful experience with life. I'd really appreciate it if you would click the like button above and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you! More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Boundaries | Ep #37 | 16 Apr 2021 | 00:23:42 | |
Boundaries are often misunderstood. Many view them as a means to control another person, a way to gain power over someone, or as something that will hurt the relationship. The truth is that a properly set boundary invites intimacy and trust. In this episode, I will be clearing up exactly what a boundary is, and what it isn’t. You will understand:
You’ll come away from this episode empowered with the ability to more clearly see boundaries that need to be strengthened, and how you can step into a more honest version of yourself by honoring those boundaries. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Forgiveness | Ep #36 | 09 Apr 2021 | 00:23:38 | |
Forgiveness can be a touchy subject. Why should we forgive someone who has caused us so much pain? I get it. In this episode, I’ll shed some light on how forgiveness is not actually for them- it is for you. I’ll go over what forgiveness is, and what it isn’t. Some of the ideas people believe about forgiveness are faulty and create additional pain. We’ll uncover those and learn what forgiveness really is about and why it’s such a gift to give ourselves. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Who Should I Tell? | Ep #142 | 17 May 2024 | 00:20:03 | |
A question I get asked a lot is, “Who should I tell?"
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| Thriving After Infidelity | Ep #35 | 02 Apr 2021 | 00:25:38 | |
Marriages can survive infidelity. But can the couple really thrive? This is a question I get asked a lot, and in this episode you’ll understand why the answer is a resounding YES! Rebuilding a marriage after infidelity requires some specific tools and mindset shifts. It requires resiliency, curiosity, and a determination to change the narrative surrounding the infidelity. In this episode, you’ll learn what these tools and skills are, and how to implement them. You’ll be able to identify what areas you are stuck in and concrete solutions to truly moving forward and building a marriage that is stronger and more intimate than what you had before. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Pornography and Trust with Lindsay and Danny Poelman | Ep #34 | 26 Mar 2021 | 00:51:42 | |
Pornography in marriages can feel threatening, shameful and impossible to overcome. In today’s episode, guests Lindsay and Danny Poelman share their story of overcoming the grip of pornography and creating a marriage much stronger than the one they had before. For so many, porn use can feel crippling. Many men (and women) feel intense shame around porn use which ultimately keeps them stuck. In this episode, you’ll learn how changing the narrative around porn use and empowering the individual can transform a marriage. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Jealousy | Ep #33 | 19 Mar 2021 | 00:17:37 | |
Frequently called “the green-eyed monster,” jealousy is an emotion we don’t often want to admit experiencing. We judge ourselves for feeling it, as we wonder what is wrong with us, and wind up in all kinds of painful mind drama. After experiencing infidelity, jealousy can feel like a constant companion. Those pesky intrusive thoughts that creep in? The images you see? The incessant thoughts about “the other woman”? These are all normal to experience after a betrayal, but are rooted in fear and doubt. In this episode, you’ll learn how envy and jealousy are different emotions, with different fear meanings attached to them. When you understand the root cause of jealousy and envy, you’ll know how to help release yourself from their grip. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Buffering | Ep #32 | 12 Mar 2021 | 00:24:53 | |
Most of us have been conditioned our entire lives with the messaging that we should just be happy and filled with pleasure at all times. When we don’t feel happy all the time, we avoid the negative emotion by buffering from what is actually real. In this episode, you’ll learn the real reasons why you buffer, and what it is costing you. When we buffer, we give ourselves a false sense of safety and security, but we are missing the opportunity to understand why we are buffering in the first place. We miss what the uncomfortable emotion is that we are avoiding, and why it keeps showing up. Learning to stop buffering is where life becomes really good. You stop needing false pleasure because you know how to create it with your mind. You aren’t afraid to feel any emotion. You stop hiding from yourself and start creating the life you actually want. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Perfectionism | Ep #31 | 05 Mar 2021 | 00:30:38 | |
Perfection is a myth, yet so many of us think that we should be perfect to be acceptable and loveable. We can easily fall into being over-achievers or under-achievers, both as veils to hide our perceived insecurities and flaws. This kind of thinking stifles our own development, and keeps us from developing real, vulnerable relationships with others where we allow ourselves to be seen. We may also block our own ability to really see others as they are. In this episode, you’ll learn if you are a perfectionist (you may be surprised by some of the ways perfectionism rears its head!), how it is affecting you and your loved ones, and you'll be provided clear tools that will help you grow in your capacity to love yourself in your imperfections. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| When You Feel Betrayed by God with David Butler | Ep #30 | 26 Feb 2021 | 01:01:28 | |
When life doesn’t go the way we thought it would, it can be easy to blame God. Sometimes in our darkest moments we can wonder if He abandoned us. In this episode, guest David Butler and I will be discussing ways to cope with this painful experience. David Butler is a best-selling author, co-host of the acclaimed “Don’t Miss This” podcast, and educator. His unique view on God and scripture brings insight to this topic that will help listeners understand that they are not alone. In this episode, you’ll gain a greater understanding of how transactional relationships can hurt us, how Jesus Christ is the perfect example in all things, and why we are sometimes left seemingly alone. You’ll know how to turn back to God, and heal the trust that has been lost. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| All or Nothing Thinking | Ep #29 | 19 Feb 2021 | 00:24:20 | |
In this episode, I’ll be diving into why it is worth leaning into the “cognitive dissonance,” or the space in between black and white where things feel a little more fuzzy. It is in this space that we grow. We try on new ideas, understand others on a deeper level, and create a safe place for ourselves, even when we don’t have all the answers. Even more importantly, when we can allow the discomfort of the gray area, healing takes place. If we can believe that someone who hurt us is both good and bad, it becomes possible to heal the relationship, and to give ourselves that same consideration. Listen to gain a deeper understanding of where you may be stuck in all-or-nothing thinking, and what you can do to broaden your view. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Using Feelings As Fuel | Ep #28 | 12 Feb 2021 | 00:25:26 | |
Thoughts create our feelings, but feelings are the fuel that create our experience with life. When we learn to leverage the power of feelings, there is nothing you are unwilling to do, because you will be willing to feel any emotion in service of the result you want most. In this episode, you will learn specific tools that will help you create the emotion that you want, and have an understanding of why both positive and negative emotions can be useful. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Discomfort Tolerance | Ep #27 | 05 Feb 2021 | 00:23:51 | |
When faced with an uncomfortable situation, our natural tendency is to get out as quickly as possible. Sometimes we physically or emotionally check out in an attempt to avoid pain. In today’s episode, you’ll learn why your greatest growth comes from increasing your tolerance to discomfort - not avoiding it altogether. By paying attention to what we want most in life, our willingness to allow discomfort will grow. When there is an understanding that the discomfort is in service of your ultimate goal, we are more willing to lean into the growth. The more we grow, the more bold we become in the conversations we are willing to have, and in the things we try. We go after our dreams. We allow ourselves to mess up. We give permission to others to mess up. We become the most honest versions of ourselves. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Anchoring to What You Know | Ep #26 | 29 Jan 2021 | 00:24:17 | |
When faced with decisions, our brains automatically point out all the things we don’t know, all the reasons it won’t work, and why we should be afraid. In this podcast, you’ll learn why starting with what you do know will help you solve what you don’t. For as long as humans have existed, our primal response to any kind of threat or danger is to get defensive, confused, and go looking for safety outside ourselves. Although this has kept us alive, it is outdated and does not ultimately help us create the kind of life we want on purpose. In this episode, you’ll learn in more depth why your brain automatically takes you to negative thinking, and how to override it with thoughts and beliefs that help you move forward. Remembering what you know first helps bring the brain back to a grounded, calm place, and can serve as a filter for all of the fears and doubts that follow. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Your Wounded Child | Ep #141 | 03 May 2024 | 00:29:45 | |
As children raised by imperfect parents, we all have “core wounds” that inform much of our life. We may have had experiences we did not know how to process, and therefore made up stories of what those things meant that we still carry with us today.
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| Accepting What Is | Ep #25 | 22 Jan 2021 | 00:26:23 | |
When it comes to healing from infidelity, acceptance is key to moving forward. This does not mean agreeing with it, liking it or not being sad about it. Acceptance means acknowledging that it happened instead of arguing with it. When I first start working with new clients, they generally switch back and forth between making themselves wrong for the infidelity, or making their spouse wrong. Both stories have the potential to bring up strong emotions, and they often use those emotions against themselves instead of processing them. In this episode, you’ll learn the 3 stages of growth and how acceptance is a key ingredient to moving forward. You’ll learn what acceptance is, and what it isn’t. You’ll understand the freedom that emerges when we let our thoughts be just thoughts, and aren’t threatened by our own feelings. As we allow ourselves to just be, we create a safe place to feel, process, and ultimately create the life we really want. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Post Traumatic Growth with Krista St-Germain | Ep #24 | 15 Jan 2021 | 00:44:25 | |
If you’ve been listening to the podcast for awhile, you know how much I talk about the growth that can happen following a life-changing (and un-asked for) event. In this episode, I talk with my first podcast guest, Master Coach Krista St-Germain, all about post traumatic growth. Krista is very familiar with grief, loss and having plans change. In this episode, she’ll share her own story of loss and how it propelled her into challenging her beliefs, leaning into future possibility, and ultimately helping others grow after loss. If you’ve ever wondered how you can be even stronger after infidelity, this episode is for you. You’ll hear us talk about grief, loss, post traumatic growth, and how to manage regret. You’ll leave with new hope for what is possible in your life. You don’t want to miss it! To learn more from Krista, you can check her out here:
More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| Allowing Yourself to Be Wrong | Ep #23 | 08 Jan 2021 | 00:31:05 | |
For most of us, being wrong feels like a threat. If we are wrong, what does it mean about us, our judgement, and our ability to make wise choices in the future? In this episode, you’ll learn why it’s actually good news that you could be wrong. When we give ourselves permission to be wrong about our assumptions of ourselves and others, it makes space for other thoughts and emotions. We can get curious about new possibilities. We can challenge thoughts we’ve had about ourselves that feel factual but cause a lot of pain. In this episode, you’ll hear various examples of how allowing yourself to be wrong can be the tool that helps you move forward. From thoughts about yourself, thoughts about others and what you are capable of achieving, you’ll learn how to talk to yourself in a way that allows for error and helps you change the narrative. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2021 Andrea Giles | |||
| How to Set Goals | Ep #22 | 01 Jan 2021 | 00:20:16 | |
It’s the beginning of a New Year, and for many of us it means setting goals for 2021. Statistically, even the most well-intentioned goals often fizzle out and we end up feeling like we failed. Today, you’ll learn how to make goals that actually stick. Most of us have been taught to go after goals that scare us, but our brains are naturally inclined to run from things that feel hard. That is why most people quit. In this episode, you’ll learn exactly how to set goals that are both challenging and doable. Goals that keep you progressing, but also feel accomplishable. You’ll also understand why it can be very healing to work towards something that helps you get out of “survival mode” and start thriving. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| Preparing for Hard Days | Ep #21 | 18 Dec 2020 | 00:24:40 | |
All of us have days when we may feel anxious anticipation, but sometimes those days can become more frequent after infidelity, divorce, or other life-changing events. This episode will dive into how to prepare for hard days. Whether it is a custody situation, an anniversary, or being around people who may ask tough questions, it is possible to not let those events de-rail you. Listen to understand how to best prepare for those days so you can set yourself up for success. You’ll know how to handle your emotions, how to be the best version of yourself, and how you can create the outcome in your mind before the day happens. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| Learning to Trust, Part 2 | Ep #20 | 11 Dec 2020 | 00:22:30 | |
On last week’s podcast, you learned about the different kinds of trust and how to build trust in yourself. In this episode, you’ll learn some of the pitfalls to building trust and what you can do to create a more trusting environment for yourself and others. You’ll learn how we can mis-read disappointment as a betrayal, and why it is important to learn to differentiate between the two. You’ll also understand the importance of cultivating an environment of trust in your relationships, whether you are staying married or not. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| Learning to Trust | Ep #19 | 04 Dec 2020 | 00:23:19 | |
One of the most common questions after experiencing infidelity is, “Can I ever trust again?” In this episode, we’ll explore different kinds of trust and how to build the most important kind of trust, a trust in yourself. When faced with infidelity, the foundation of trust can be broken, and it takes time to repair it. In this episode, you’ll learn how to make “temporary” fixes, and how to make more lasting, solid repairs that will lead to the most fulfilling relationships. Learning to trust is a process that requires patience, but ultimately allows the betrayed partner to fully engage in the relationship, and learn to trust themselves, no matter what choices anyone else makes. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| Journaling | Ep #18 | 27 Nov 2020 | 00:20:27 | |
You may have heard that journaling can be a healing process, but there are benefits you may never have thought about. In addition to being a healing tool to our physical bodies, journaling is proven to be an emotional regulator and healer as well. In this episode, I will share how impactful journaling has been for me, how to journal, and why I encourage you to make it a part of your daily practice. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| What It Takes To Heal | Ep #17 | 20 Nov 2020 | 00:25:42 | |
Healing from infidelity can seem so overwhelming, undefined and unattainable. In this episode, I’ll share 6 things that help in the process of healing. In a simple online search, you can find many varying opinions about how healing actually happens after infidelity. Can it actually be done? Yes. Listen to understand why some traditional views on healing (such as the saying, “Time heals all wounds”) aren’t necessarily true if we don’t know what to be actively doing with that time. You’ll learn how valuable self-compassion is, and more tools to help you process your emotions as you move forward. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| The 50/50 Rule | Ep #16 | 13 Nov 2020 | 00:25:32 | |
Do you ever wonder if you can just feel "good"? In this episode, you'll learn why we aren't programmed to feel good all the time, and why it's actually a positive thing. Most of us spend our life feeling just a few main emotions, and wonder why we keep getting the same results. When you learn that life is best when we allow both the positive and the negative, doors open up that were once closed. There is literally nothing you won't do if you know you can handle any emotion. Listen to understand how some of your emotions may be holding you back, how even negative emotions can serve you, and how to feel more of what you want. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| Three Myths and Three Truths About Infidelity | Ep #140 | 19 Apr 2024 | 00:29:56 | |
In this episode, I cover 3 common myths circulating about infidelity, and 3 truths to counter them.
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| Changing Your Past | Ep #15 | 06 Nov 2020 | 00:22:30 | |
If I were to ask you who you are, you would probably answer with some information from your past. Most of us go through life not really challenging our stories - we believe them as fact. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ | |||
| The Manual | Ep #14 | 30 Oct 2020 | 00:28:40 | |
Most of us have long, detailed “scripts” of how others should behave, and when they don’t, we get upset. We expect others to follow the script, even if they don’t know it exists. This is not only frustrating for the people in our lives, but very frustrating for ourselves because of what we make it mean that they didn’t do what we wanted them to do. Listen to this podcast to understand the difference between making requests of others and having your own back whether they agree or not, and turning all of our emotional well-being over to others. You’ll understand the freedom that comes from actually allowing people to be who they are rather than who we want them to be so we can feel better about them and ourselves. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||
| How To Have Difficult Conversations | Ep #13 | 23 Oct 2020 | 00:25:05 | |
Join me on this podcast to learn what keeps us from telling the hard truth in conversations, and why it is actually not only hurting you, but the relationship itself. How many times have you avoided a conversation because you know it may get tense and uncomfortable? In this podcast I’ll teach you why that tension is actually not a problem, and how allowing yourself to sit in that tension creates the space to problem solve and get what you actually, truly want. More information at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/ © 2020 Andrea Giles | |||