How open(-minded) are you, really? And how "free" do you feel?

Our biggest fear is not being loved. And fears keep us stuck in the comfort zone. But what happens when we suspend fear?

While reflecting on our peculiar summer, we explain how openness, curiosity, and feeling comfortable in your own body can bring you a deeper sense of connection and, ultimately, freedom.

There's a different flavour when you meet people who are willing to share themselves and their stories - who are unapologetically themselves and in their body.

If you're one of those people that feel stuck and just dream of being free (from whatever) but don't know how, you might want to listen to this. The whole conversation is a beautiful metaphor for how life can be lived.

!! Don’t miss our book recommendation at the end !!

==

TIME STAMPS

1:32 Our Mission Is To Help People Open To Love

03:04 A Music Festival As An Open Love Experience

03:50 Openness + Nakedness = Freedom

07:11 What You Wouldn't Expect About Being Naked

08:51 Feeling Comfortable vs. Feeling Confident

09:46 It's Not About You, It's About Them

13:10 You Can Be Monogamously Open

15:23 When Your Husband Shows You Support Instead Of Anger

18:22 Yo Gotta Overcome The Fear To Love

19:16 Recommended Light Summer Reading: Wild Nights

==

YOUR GOODIES:

>> FREE GUIDE FOR DOWNLOAD: “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

>> Recommended book: “Wild Nights” by David Deida 

(this podcast is entirely supported by our listeners, so if you buy through this link we may earn a commission, at no extra cost to you - thanks in advance for your support!)

==

Deeper Lovers on the web: www.deeperlovers.com

 

>> Register for Chiara's FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" (limited spots available)

 

>> Register for Chiara's FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" (limited spots available)

 

Communication is THE KEY in enhancing relationships and sexual experiences.

Drawing from our personal and professional experiences, we share practical tips on how you can initiate open dialogues about desires, needs, and fantasies with your partner.

As always we emphasise on creating a safe space for vulnerability, avoiding blame, and using creative alternative methods like scheduled talks, writing sexy emails to each other and, why not, listening to content together.

If you wonder how keep going at this seemingly utopian rate, this is it! Don't miss this episode.

==

TIME STAMPS

02:36 Experience in communicating 04:03 What stops us from sharing dark secrets 06:09 Communicating is hard! 08:18 How to practice "exposing" yourself 09:50 We all have the same fantasy (and the same fear) 12:58 1. Let it flow 14:29 2. Quit the blame 16:07 3. Create a safe space for an intentional conversation 20:19 4. Listen to content together 24:21 5. "Please can you help me to understand..." 26:16 6. Show that you're listening - aka be present with them 27:50 7. Have an "exploratory" vs. a "goal-oriented" conversation 29:05 8. Writing sexy emails to each other is less confrontational 33:01 9. When in doubt, say what's on your mind

==

 >> FREE BONUS: Download our free guide “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

 

Register for Chiara's FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" (limited spots available)

>> Register for Chiara's FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" (limited spots available)

 

Are you longing for deeper, more intimate sexy time?

Today we share our personal journey of learning how to shift boundaries in the ENM and kinky world that we sometimes play in, and draw lessons for how intimacy and sensuality can supercharge connections - in all kinds of relationships.

We talk about how rare it is to find partners who share a similar emphasis on slow, intimate play, and we will provide a few tips on how to communicate  intimacy in your own relationship – monogamous or not - so that you can experience and nurture the power of focusing on the present moment to have mind blowing encounters.

==

TIME STAMPS

02:31 Exploring Intimacy Beyond the Norm

05:16 Personal Boundaries and Evolving Relationships

07:44 The Power of Sensuality

17:55 The Impact of Trust and Respect in Sensual Encounters

22:48 The Essence of Sensuality: Being Present and Connected with Each Other

30:07 Navigating Safety and Comfort

36:56 Is He Worthy Of You?

38:11 Exploring the Paradox of Intimacy in ENM

==

 

FREE LIVE workshop on how to share secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

Contrary to what many people fear, today we talk about how non-monogamy can actually strengthen relationships.

You’ll learn something seemingly counterintuitive: how can adding more “bodies'' into a relationship strengthen a bond? 

We unpack concepts like open communication, trust, honest conversations, respecting boundaries, and navigating complex emotions together. 

Allie shares how she made her man’s fantasy come true by organizing a surprise birthday party in his office… While you might think this is counter-intuitive, her story is actually a great example of how communication and trust made their relationship even stronger.

We’ll give you the ins and outs of how to prioritize the couple’s intimacy, desire, and mutual pleasure while maintaining a strong emotional connection with each other.

We also talk about: personal growth, how sharing fantasies can help you increase trust, how to communicate that there is something wrong by processing information before making a scene, and how to ask for what you need.

=== 

[00:01:29] What is a Unicorn?

[00:02:32] Can swinging strengthen a couple's relationship?

[00:04:01] Allie’s perspective

00:04:01] The power of communication and boundaries in swinging

[00:04:31] Fantasies: a journey of exploration together

[00:04:54] Chiara’s perspective

[00:06:26] A naughty fantasy made come true as a birthday present to your man

[00:14:31] Wills perspective

[00:19:38] Respect is always a must

[00:19:45] How to navigate challenges and emotions in open relationships

[00:24:09] The importance of confidence and teamwork

[00:26:37] Open a relationship may result in massive personal growth

[00:35:01] "Desiring" vs. "needing something in a relationship

===

For more info about the hosts, and to book a free chemistry call, visit deeperlovers.com

===

Follow us on Instagram

===

>> Download our free guide “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

Join Chiara on her next FREE LIVE workshop "How to share secret fantasies" RESERVE YOUR SEAT (limited seats available)

What are the challenges that couples face in maintaining a fulfilling sex life, especially as responsibilities grow and the initial spark fades?

Today we have a very open and honest discussion about the importance of creating time for intimacy and sensuality - which is not just having “sexual intercourse” as your main goal.

We share our own experiences and learnings, such as how we communicated in tricky situations, how we made ourselves vulnerable and how to create a safe space for each other.

We also discuss how non-monogamy might be an option for some, as a catalyst for deeper connection and exploration beyond what traditional society teaches us.

===

02:16 Welcome to Our Sensual Journey

03:07 Reflecting on Past Relationships and Sexual Fulfillment

04:50 The Common Struggle of Maintaining Intimacy

06:46 Prioritizing Your Relationship Amidst a Busy Life

10:50 The Importance of Quality Over Quantity in Sexual Relationships

15:43 Exploring Non-Monogamy and Its Impact on Our Relationship

22:18 The Role of Inner Work in Enhancing Sexual Connection

37:38 Advice for Couples Struggling with Intimacy

 

Welcome to Deeper Sex, a podcast about connection, exploration, and adventure.  

 

ABOUT WILL

Psychologist, journalist, entrepreneur, spin doctor, executive advisor and father. For two decades his passion was the world of words and stories. He reported from wars and riots. He wrote communication strategies for governments and prime ministers. He coached CEOs and rocket scientists. He built companies and made his fortune, changed track, reinvented himself, and refocused his energy on inner meaning.

Today, Will works as a coach and retreat facilitator, following his vocation to help others unblock their lives and find meaning and happiness. He is fascinated by the power of love, intimacy and sexual liberation to forge profound relationships with others and unlock healing forces within ourselves.

Will is married to Chiara and could not possibly be happier.

 

ABOUT CHIARA

ICF-certified professional Co-Active Coach® with a masters in business communication. Ex director for a tech pioneer where she led sales teams for 15 years. Communicating and helping others perform were her daily bread. Finding herself successful but unfulfilled, she left her first marriage, quit the corporate world and embarked on a new journey – first to reinvent herself and then to help others chart their own path of purpose. She learnt to channel her energy from masculine overachiever to feminine goddess turned (self)-love mentor.  She reconnected with her body and learned to receive true love.

Today Chiara runs deep intimacy experiences and programmes for men and women who are keen to grow together, exploring deeper ways to connect. She helps people find their voice and feel safe to talk about their desires and fears, without shame or drama.

 

Free resources + next steps for your sexual healing journey:

• Download the free guide: “10 phrases to start deeper conversations with your partner”
• FREE LIVE WORKSHOP "How to share secret fantasies without shame or fear" - REGISTER NOW (limited spots available)

For more info, visit www.deeperlovers.com

Jealousy can serve as a useful tool in relationships when rooted in objective facts: it can be a sign of real issues, but also a reflection of deeper insecurities. How do you know?

In this episode we cover the various sides of jealousy, how to understand when it is keeping you safe, vs. when it’s signalling that there’s something deeper to look into – your body generally knows best.

We look at jealousy in the context of ENM couples, tho the same concepts can equally be applied to monogamous relationships.

The importance of a strong relationship foundation, open communication, and setting flexible ground rules are what will make you feel safe, confident, and ultimately set you free. Embracing jealousy can be a tool to deepen intimacy – believe it or not.

If you've ever struggled with jealousy or just want to understand it better - this episode is for you.

 

SHOWNOTES

01:47 I Am So Jealous!

04:55 How To Have Difficult Conversations With Your Partner

05:27 Keep The Dialogue Open And Ask With No Expectations

14:54 Embracing Jealousy Can Keep You Safe

16:00 Your Body Has All The Answers Inside

==

The sensual surprise Chiara arranged for Will’s birthday (E7): Listen on Apple or Listen on Spotify

==

FREE BONUS CONTENT:

- Download our free guide “10 prompts to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

- REGISTER NOW: FREE LIVE WORKSHOP with Chiara "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" (limited spots available)

Have you ever dreamt of joining a threesome but never dared ask your partner? It’s a universal fantasy, and one that can become reality with trust and good communication.

In this episode, we share a very intimate experience where we pushed our boundaries further than ever before: for the first and only time in our life, Chiara is "lent" for the night as a Unicorn to Allie and her husband, while Will is away on an expedition.

He talks vulnerably about his internal struggle between a positively erotic idea and the negative social conditioning around masculinity and ownership that would mark this as incredibly wrong and dysfunctional. 

He also explains the strong bond he created with Allie’s man, the complete trust and clear communication that they have, highlighting the significance of male, brotherly energy and trust.

Our goal in sharing this story is to show you what’s possible when the bond in a couple is so strong, and complete trust has been achieved: we would have not been able to do this before our deep inner work and sexual deconditioning journey! 

Our intention is to purely inspire you to embrace sexual liberation by learning how clear communication, vulnerability and boundaries work Even within the boundaries of your monogamous relationship, there's plenty of things you can try out!

===

02:56 What is a Unicorn 05:11 Trust, Desire, Fantasies And Open Communication 07:27 Healthy Management of Emotions: Thrill or Jealousy? 12:51 A Strog Secure Bond Can Take You To Depths You Can't Imagine 13:40 The Potential Risk of Damaging a Relationship 14:24 What It Feels Like to Join Another Couple as a Unicorn 14:57 Only When You Feel Safe You Can Relax 15:47 Conditioning: Shall We Listen To It? 17:01 Protect What's Precious 19:13 Giving vs. Taking Attitude in Bed 22:35 Is There Such A Thing As "Too Much"?

===

Free resources + next steps for your sexual healing journey:

• Download the free guide: “10 phrases to start deeper conversations with your partner”
• Chiara’s FREE LIVE WORKSHOP on how to share secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

ALERT: FREE workshop on how to share secret fantasies (Live with Chiara): RESERVE YOUR SEAT

Are you “vanilla” or “spicy”? Are you into ENM? Are you not? Are you curious? How much should you share about this with your friends? And should you drag them into this exploration with you?

These are all themes we discuss in this episode, focusing on the importance of respecting the boundaries of people around you.

While we could not wish for deeper connections and the personal growth that we've gained from exploring ourselves the Ethical Non-Monogamy world (ENM), we understand this might not be necessarily everyone's cup of tea.

Our objective is, as always, to demystify society’s misconceptions, promoting open mindedness and sexual liberation, as this is THE SECRET recipe to a great sex life - whether you choose to have one or multiple partners.

If you’re looking for practical advice on how to navigate challenging but genuine conversations about your curiosity and interest in adding more people to your romantic situation, this is it!

==

>> Link to our OG episode: how Will and Chiara got over conservative backgrounds and sailed for sexual liberation: Listen on Apple or Listen on Spotify

==

Join The Waitlist for our Signature Sensuality Workshop

==

TIME STAMPS

01:12 Are Alternative Forms Of Relationships An Option?  05:51 Be Yourself But Respect Others' Boundaries 08:39 The Highest Form Of Sexual Liberation 18:16 Build Strong Relationship Foundations and Create Deep Emotional Bonds 19:25 Coming Out Can Be A Challenge 24:21 Superficiality or Depth? 25:41 What You Didn't Know About Playing With Others As A Couple 27:14 What We Love About The Openness Of Relationships 27:53 How To Manage Jealousy 33:42 Should We Try To Fuck Our Friends Then?

Free resources + next steps for your sexual healing journey:

 

- Download the free guide:

“10 phrases to start deeper conversations with your partner”

 

- Will & Chiara’s mini-course: “How to talk to your partner so they actually see you” - Join the waitlist

 

- Will & Chiara’s 1:1 monthly mentorship - Apply here

 

Deeper Lovers on Instagram

For more info, visit www.deeperlovers.com

 

Have you ever experienced how sensuality and soft touch can 10x your sexual encounters? 

Listen to the sensual birthday surprise that Chiara arranged for her husband Will: beyond the sexiness of it all, you’ll learn how embracing sensuality, soft touch, and vulnerability can positively impact your intimacy - and your relationship overall.

Will describes his struggle to relax and surrender to receiving attention from his woman, and how releasing the pressure of a “goal” can unlock new depths of pleasure and connection.

You will also learn how understanding and embracing your desires can be a powerful way to strengthen your bond and experience intimacy in a way you never have before.

If you’ve felt blocked, ashamed of not knowing what to do, or unsatisfied in your sex life, you don’t want to miss this episode.

==

SHOWNOTES

01:23 Beyond Sex As The Goal

02:17 Our Signature Sensuality Workshop

03:17 A Sensual Surprise: What Chiara Planned For Will's Birthday

07:45 Learning to Receive As A Man

10:54 The Dom/Sub Relationship Parallel

13:02 Mindfulness Technique: How To Drop Into The Receiver Mode

15:21 How To Receive By Staying In Your Masculine

19:48 Exploring Sensuality Beyond the Bedroom

20:17 Inside Our Sensuality Signature Workshop: What to Expect

24:29 The Fantasy Game: Learn To Verbalise Fantasies and Tell S*xy Stories

28:13 Sensuality Workshop: Join The Waitlist

==

Listen to how you can talk about your sexual fantasies with your partner, how to share them with confidence and overcome taboos:

Listen on Apple 

Listen on Spotify 

==

Deeper Lovers on Instagram

==

FREE BONUS CONTENT: Download our free guide “10 prompts to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

 

For more info on how the hosts can help you deepen your own romantic relationship, visit deeperlovers.com

FREE LIVE workshop with Chiara: "How to share secret fantasies without shame or fear" BOOK NOW (limited seats available)

Almost everyone carries with them a sexual fantasy they don’t dare to share. We hesitate to reveal our desires, even to a loving partner, out of shame or fear of judgment.

Some fantasies are scenes you might like to live out for real. Others will remain sexy movies that we play just for ourselves. Either way, fantasies are erotic fuel – and their power multiplies if you find courage to voice them.

In this super-sexy episode, we made ourselves vulnerable by sharing with each other some fantasies that we had never revealed before. We explore what makes it hard to express desires that our conditioning labels weird or dirty. We reflect on how liberating it feels to take that leap of faith and be rewarded with love.

We hope that listening to us might inspire you or trigger a spicy conversation or two with your partner.

===

SENSUALITY SIGNATURE WORKSHOP: Join The Waitlist

===

01:17 What Are The Collective The Unspoken Desires?

03:58 Fantasy 1: Being Taken

04:58 The Stigma Around Expressing Sexual Fantasies: It's Shameful!

05:37 Conditioning of Female S*xuality: Why Can't I Be A Slut

07:14 Fantasy 2: Group Play

08:14 70 Virgins or 7 Sluts?

10:49 We All Have A Masculine And Feminine Side

14:48 It's Important For A Woman To Feel Respected And In Control

15:06 Fantasy 3: Anonymous S*x In Public

19:17 Fantasy 4: Eye Contact with Stangers

19:43 Fantasy 5: Dirty Talk

21:01 Tip 1: use your voice

21:26 Tip 2: suspend the conditioning

22:10 Tip 3: set boundaries

22:39 Tip 4: eye contact game

23:10 Try our 10 prompts for free

This is our Origin Stories episode. Hear about the journeys that brought Allie, Will and Chiara from conservative childhoods, breakdowns, divorces and body shame to happiness and the strongest relationships of their lives.

We explain how we discovered ENM (ethical non-monogamy), survived novice mistakes and navigated the circus, but also how we learned to communicate to each other fearlessly, established trust and practiced standing up for ourselves, over and over again.

Perhaps you can’t picture yourself in an Eyes-Wide-Shut party - just yet or ever - and that’s fine, every relationship is beautiful and unique as is. We just want to use our unconventional and “a little out there” stories to help you explore what’s possible, providing ideas that can empower everybody.

Our recommendation is: take what resonates and works for you, and leave out the rest!

==

TIME STAMPS

02:10 You Should Listen If...

02:33 How Will Started Exploring Unconventional Relationships

05:37 Chiara's Journey From Her Catholic Roots

08:21 From Fantasy To Reality

09:53 Always Communicate Clearly

11:37 Sexperts Night

13:15 Visiting Fun4Two Swingers Club

14:14 The Dark Room

15:58 The Hot Tub Incident

18:50 Allie's Journey From Small Town Girl

21:47 If We Cheat We Cheat Together

23:09 An Eyes Wide Shut Party Gone Sideways

27:30 Connecting With Others - Together - Could Strengthen Your Relationship

32:12 Play Parties Can Enhance Your Body Confidence

33:49 Tips On How To Test The Waters In Sex Positive Spaces

34:42 Is It for Everyone?

36:49 The Thrill of Exploration: Keeping the Spark Alive

41:15 What We Learnt

==

>> Sensuality & Soft Touch Workshop: Join The Waitlist

==

FREE DOWNLOAD: “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

==

>> Follow us on Instagram

==

For more info about the hosts, and to book a free chemistry call, visit deeperlovers.com

Body image is a very common problem for both men and women. Today we discuss how negative perceptions can impact intimacy and relationships, and how healing and personal growth can transform your sex life and deepen your connection.

Women in particular often feel negatively about their appearance due to societal standards, so Chiara vulnerably shares her journey back to loving her body.

We also explore how the lens of positive self-perception can boost sexual confidence: deeper sexiness comes from feeling confident and comfortable in one's skin, rather than conforming to external beauty standards.

For those that might be curious, you’ll also hear how non-monogamy and swinging can be platforms for receiving genuine feedback from others that don’t necessarily have a vested interest in just giving you a compliment - like a husband or friend would do.

==

Sensuality & Soft Touch Workshop: Join The Waitlist

==

Send us your questions here

==

Book a free chemistry call here

==

Follow us on Instagram

==

For more info on how the hosts can help you deepen your own relationship, visit deeperlovers.com

==

>> Download our free guide “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

FREE LIVE workshop on how to share secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

Guess what! We’ve been live for 6 months already, and we have a big surprise coming up for you!

We are closing out Season 1 of the Deeper Sex Podcast to come back with Season 2 and offer something even more exciting and useful to you and your lover, in and out of the bedroom.

We believe that sex should not be the driver of arguments and unhappiness for a couple. Nor should it be taboo. 

We have witnessed, tried and tested on our own skin how it can be used to heal from trauma, fears, and to grow. 

What's coming:

We are taking the intimacy and sacred sexuality practices that have completely revolutionised our way of loving, and are putting them into very simple practical terms for you so, that everyone can apply and practice them in their own bedroom.

If this is calling you, join our next workshop.

==

Meanwhile, don’t miss:

 

>> Our fav books

• “50 Misconceptions Of Sex” by Alexa Vartman
• “Wild Nights” by David Deida

(this podcast is entirely supported by our listeners, so if you buy through this link we may earn a commission, at no extra cost to you)

 

>> Catch up on these episodes

 

13: How To Be Sexually “Open” Even If You’re Monogamous | Feeling Free

Learn more about what we mean by “Openness” at 360 degrees and how that can 10x the relationship with your partner. Listen on Apple or Spotify.

 

6: There’s No Shame In “Dirty” Fantasies: How Speaking Them Out Loud Can Transform Your Taboos into Passion

Learn about how to share sexual fantasies with your lover, overcoming fear, shame and taboos. Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

5: From Failed-Marriage Misery to Cosmic Sex: How we did it (via ENM and sex positive spaces)

Learn more about the hosts’ conservative backgrounds and how they “fell” into the amazing, sexually liberated world of Consensual Non Monogamy. Listen on Apple or Spotify

==

Download our free guide “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

==

TIME STAMPS

01:54 You Helped Us Grow

03:25 Deeper Sex Content In Season 2

04:16 Sex At the Intersection Between Sexuality, Curiosity, Healing And Personal Growth

05:25 A Surprise For You

07:52 10 Prompts To Start Deeper Conversations With Your Partner

08:15 Your Reading List to Get Ready For Season 2

www.deeperlovers.com

Next FREE LIVE workshop on sharing secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

Will and Chiara are interviewed by Human Design coach Adriana to explore how they transformed their lives through sexual exploration and liberation. 

They’ve made intimacy coaching their life’s purpose, because there’s so much fun and sex to be had in life, that everyone should be able to experience it! 

They talk about their journey of following their hearts and intuition, instead of conforming to what others expected. They highlight how their union is always of the utmost priority, above and beyond anything and anyone else.

On a spontaneous trip, they discovered the world of New Tantra and realized that that was “the code” - the language - for how they had been connecting all along. They found themselves into deeper and deeper sexual connections and an incredibly fulfilling sex life that massively influenced their business and their daily life… from miserable to super fun and exciting.

The secret to all this? Curiosity and… well, tune into the episode to find out!

Whether you’re a man or a woman wondering if there’s more to coupledom, or maybe bored in a sexless marriage, you too can go from an average relationship and a “middle-aged” sex life to an incredible connection with your partner, having mind-blowing, hours-long orgasmic marathons.

==

To learn more about what we mean by “Openness” at 360 degrees and how that can 10x the relationship with your partner, check out our episode on Apple or on Spotify.

And… don’t miss this book on the topic! “Wild Nights” by David Deida 

(this podcast is entirely supported by our listeners, so if you buy through this link we may earn a commission, at no extra cost to you)

==

To learn more about how you can work with and accept your body image, check out this episode on Apple or on Spotify

==

TIME STAMPS

01:18 Meet Adriana, our Human Design Coach

02:26 Download Our Free Guide

03:02 How Will and Chiara Help Clients Have Better Romantic Relationships

06:22 How The Power of Intuition Got Chiara The Amazing Husband She Has

09:55 Why Intimacy Coaching

14:32 Why We Decided To Explore Ethical Non-Monogamy

18:59 This Could Be Your Community Too

21:29 The Deeper Sex Podcast In The Making

22:42 We Explored The Swinging Community But It Was Not For Us

24:04 From Swinging to New Tantra

25:26 Fantasy vs. Reality

25:50 Are You One Of The People We Can Help?

26:13 Who We Want To Help: Meet Our Friends John And Jane

34:45 Accepting Yourself And Your Body Image

40:43 How To Use Curiosity To Overcome Fear

==

 >> FREE BONUS CONTENT: Download our free guide “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

>> FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" << REGISTER HERE

This is a must-listen for both men and women looking to feel more, longer and better orgasms.

Today’s episode will completely transform your understanding of what “coming” is:

Did you know that there are many types of orgasms for women?

And did you know that men can orgasm without ejaculating… and vice versa?

Love and intimacy coaches Will and Chiara challenge common beliefs around clitoral stimulation and vibrators, sharing their personal experience and tantric journey towards full body orgasms that can last for over 10 minutes – for both men and women.

Got your attention? Press play to learn a few tricks you can use in your next intimate encounter to give and experience a level of intimacy (and pleasure) that you didn’t think possible.

 

TIME STAMPS

01:00 Let's talk about orgasms

01:22 How many types of orgasms are there?

04:34 Female orgasms

07:12 The "spasm orgasm" is the enemy

08:17 Leave the clit alone!

09:55 Vibrators simply desensitize you

11:33 What are you doing to me?

13:52 How true presence gives a massively enhanced sexual experience

17:23 You DON'T NEED to give an orgasm to each other

18:50 The trick is to NOT THINK about what happens next

21:22 Best practices for men

21:36 The non-ejaculatory practice

22:45 How men can achieve longer, deeper orgasms

25:40 The secret to satisfy a woman in bed

26:18 Your sexual energy is the Life Force that drives your life

26:37 What is our primal need?

28:01 How you can support each other and both feel more pleasure

29:37 The secret club of pleasure

32:45 Remember to give yourself some slack

33:21 The 21 days challenge

34:16 Do this to cure premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction

35:46 What to do when he wants more sex than her

37:11 If you are her

37:28 If you are him

37:51 How you can better communicate your needs

40:14 I feel pain during intercourse

42:02 How to get a mind-blowing orgasm (recap)

42:24 1. Stop stimulating the clit

42:32 2. Stop ejaculating (or practice separating it from your orgasm)

42:56 3. Try the 21 days challenge

43:21 4. Drop the blaming

==

Get the book: 50 Misconceptions Of Sex by Alexa Vartman

==

The 21 days challenge by The New Tantra

==

Free guide download: “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

==

Send us your questions here

Download our free guide: “10 phrases to help you start deeper conversations with your partner”

 

Changing gears with Season 2, love and intimacy coaches Will and Chiara explain in very simple terms the concept of relationship Polarity, and the importance of balancing the masculine and feminine energies that you input in a relationship - regardless of your gender.

They show how a polarity imbalance often leads to conflict, blaming, and general relationship unhappiness and unease.

In this episode, they offer insights and provide practical tips for how couples can bring harmony back to their relationships. By stepping back, showing vulnerability, and understanding each other's perspectives, couples can navigate their differences and bring back the “Lover’s Energy” that initially brought them together.

==

TIME STAMPS

00:34 What We Prepared For You In Season 2

01:38 Let's Talk About Polarity in Relationships

02:31 What Women Blame Men For

03:38 What Men Blame Women For

06:27 Often Men Feel Powerless

10:36 Do We Both Have Masculine and Feminine Traits?

13:41 Both Partners Need To Contribute To The Masculine/Feminine Balance In The Couple

15:25 How Do We (Re)establish Polarity?

17:55 Restore The "Lover's" Energy

24:20 Why It's So Important To Show Vulnerability To Your Partner

25:06 What Goes Wrong In Relationships When You Hide Your Vulnerable Side

28:31 What He Needs To Do To Make Her Feel Safe

32:38 What Is Real Masculinity Today?

36:40 It's Difficult To "Just Receive"

38:13 Connect With Your Feminine Side (regardless of your gender)

43:00 How Do We Connect Deeper?

43:17 1. It's A Dance For Two

43:37 2. Listen To This With Your Partner

44:47 4. Acknowledge That All Emotions Are Valid

45:17 5. Temporarily Suspend Your Belief

45:38 6. Ask Yourself: What Am I Really Yearning For?

46:00 7. Make Space To Receive From Your Partner

46:44 8. Don't Apologise For Your Emotions

==

Link to Alexa Vartman’s book that we recommend on the show - “50 Misconceptions Of Sex”

==

Next FREE LIVE workshop on sharing secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

>> Register for Chiara's next LIVE WORKSHOP for free: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear"

To celebrate our podcast 1st anniversary, we address our clients’ most common questions in a live Q&A - from jealousy to sexual dynamics and open relationships.

Partner communication, establishing trust, and addressing underlying issues in a relationship are some of the things we are experts on, and our goal is to provide you with practical tips that will enhance your romantic connections.

If you feel even a little curious but shy, this is the episode for you.

==

TIME STAMPS

01:38 Q1. My Partner Does Not Want To Have Sex: Should We Open The Relationship?

02:48 The Risks of Opening a Relationship

06:09 Work On Your Own Relationship First

07:49 Q2. How Do I Know If My Partner Is Into Kinks?

11:09 Q3. I am So Jealous! How Do I deal With Jealousy?

18:48 Embracing Jealousy Can Keep You Safe

19:51 Your Body Has All The Answers

21:53 Q4. Am I Bi-Curious?

25:46 Q5. How Can A Man Stay Confident During Sex When Another Man Is In The Room?

29:23 It's All About Boundaries

29:59 Sexual Conditioning: What Is (Not) Doing For You?

==

YOUR GOODIES:

>> FREE DOWNLOAD: “10 phrases to start deeper conversations with your partner”

>> Send us your questions here

==

Deeper Lovers on the web: www.deeperlovers.com

 

Next FREE LIVE workshop on sharing secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

Secret Fantasies FREE LIVE workshop ALERT!

Threesomes are one of the most common fantasies - yet only few people have the courage to act on them. Is it something you should try, or is it better left as a fantasy?

In this episode, Will and Chiara explore the psychology behind group sex, the gap between fantasy and reality, and how to decide whether a threesome is right for you.

They go over the key conversations couples need to have before inviting a third person in, including the emotional impact, managing expectations, and how to navigate jealousy - often the biggest deal breaker.

They also explore how to test the waters with your partner - through dirty talk, fantasy role-play, or watching certain types of content together - to see if the idea is genuinely exciting or just intriguing in theory.

For those considering taking the next step, they share practical guidance on finding the right third, whether through dating apps, social circles, or more curated experiences like sex-positive events. They also explain the difference between FMF (two women, one man) and MFM (two men, one woman) threesomes, how to avoid common pitfalls, and why communication is essential at every stage.

Whether you're simply curious or seriously planning your adventure, this episode helps you explore your desires and possibility with clarity, awareness, compassion and respect for your relationship.

==

TIME STAMPS

00:00 Why is a threesome the most common fantasy? 03:29 Fantasy vs reality: why so many people regret it 04:09 Is your relationship ready for this? 07:21 Libido imbalances and why threesomes won’t fix them 09:19 How to start the conversation with your partner 11:25 Dirty talk as a way to explore the fantasy safely 17:24 What to expect emotionally before, during, and after 19:18 Finding a third: friends, strangers, or dating apps? 23:25 The risks of inviting someone from your social circle 26:00 Compersion: when watching your partner turns you on 30:42 FMF vs MFM: which is right for you? 33:00 Why many men find MFM threesomes easier 35:42 What women should know about MFM dynamics 37:45 Handling unexpected emotions in the moment 44:21 If you’re single, should you join a couple? 46:56 The biggest mistake couples make

==

If you want to learn more about sexual fantasies:

>> Don’t miss our previous episode on Apple or Spotify: There’s No Shame In Dirty Fantasies: How Speaking Them Out Loud Can Transform Your Relationship

 

>> Join Chiara's free live online workshop "How to share your fantasies without fear": register here

==

About Deeper Lovers: www.deeperlovers.com

>> Register for Chiara's next LIVE WORKSHOP for free: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear"

Will and Chiara tackle another taboo topic that many men (and their partners) struggle with, but rarely discuss openly: erections.

From performance anxiety to the pressure of always staying hard, they explore how much of the struggle is psychological rather than physical.

They discuss how shame, unrealistic expectations, and overthinking can interfere with arousal, and share practical ways to overcome these challenges. From breaking free of the traditional sex script to exploring the benefits of unconventional practices like non-ejaculation, they offer unusual yet groundbreaking perspectives on male sexual confidence.

You’ll also hear how women often feel responsible for their partner’s arousal, why they may misinterpret erection issues, and how couples can learn to have open, reassuring conversations that remove pressure.

Whether you’ve felt anxiety around performance or simply want a more relaxed, fulfilling intimate life, we guarantee this episode will change the way you think about erections and intimate connections.

 

TIME STAMPS 

00:00 When Did Your Dick Stop Working?

00:48 Let's Talk About Erections

02:11 The "Erectile Dysfunction" Label Does Not Serve You

03:07 Level 1 of "Mind-Fucking"

05:55 What About Cialis or Viagra?

08:40 More Pressure On The Man

09:44 You Naturally Have Things On Your Mind

11:28 The Mojo App for Erectile Dysfunction (20% off code: DEEPERSEX20)

12:44 Cock Rings Can Help With Performance

15:17 Do Women Like Cock Rings?

16:02 How To Talk About Cock Rings

18:43 Mind-Fucking Is The Problem

19:32 I'm Not Hard: How To Address The Elephant In The Room

20:26 10 Prompts To Start Difficult Conversations

21:02 Never Say "I'm Sorry If I'm Not Hard"

21:58 Have Some Fun With Sex Toys

22:46 Are You Saying I Shouldn't Ejaculate? Ever...?

23:25 Benefits of Non-Ejaculation: Increased Libido

24:35 Overcoming The Initial Resistance to Non-Ejaculation

24:58 Coming Is Not The Best Bit!

25:59 What Women Think Of Non-Ejaculation

26:25 The Pleasure Of Giving Pleasure

26:52 Benefits of Non-Ejaculation: Higher Sensitivity

27:42 Soft Dicks Are Nice!

28:46 Have You Tried A Tantric Massage?

30:37 The Secret of "No Goals" During Intercourse

32:57 The Importance Of Feeling Safe

34:19 Become A Better Lover

36:42 For Women: Tell Your Man You Like His Dick!

==

About Deeper Lovers: www.deeperlovers.com

==

YOUR GOODIES:

>> Get 20% off your Mojo membership – forever – using our discount code: DEEPERSEX20 | Sign up for the Mojo App

 

>> FREE DOWNLOAD: “10 phrases to help you have deeper conversations with your partner”

 

>>Next FREE LIVE workshop on how to share secret fantasies: RESERVE YOUR SEAT

>> FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" << REGISTER HERE

Most of us were raised to believe that sexual fantasies are shameful - or just plain wrong. But what if those forbidden desires weren’t signs that something’s broken?

In this episode, we get to the bottom of why so many people are turned on by taboos, what that says about our emotional wiring, and we share practical strategies to discuss fantasies with your partner in a way that builds trust, safety and - more importantly - turns them on, rather than scares them off.

We also openly share some of own fantasies and struggles with taboos, as well as real-life stories from our clients, from threesomes and being dominated, to consensual non-consent, emphasising the significance of curiosity and trust in deepening sexual and emotional connections.

If there’s something you’ve secretly desired but never dared to say out loud, today’s episode is your “how to” permission slip to get curious and start that super-hot conversation that you’ve always wanted to have.

==

TIME STAMPS

04:55 Your fantasies are actually normal

06:45 Why do we avoid talking about taboos?

13:58 Stay curious

17:03 Should I "request" or "propose" a kinky fantasy?

23:34 How to suggest a fantasy to your partner

24:39 Domination fantasy

27:16 Masculine and Feminine in all of us

30:03 Slutty and proud

31:36 Consensual non-consent fantasy

33:29 Rape play fantasy

36:26 Sex in public fantasy

36:58 Threesome fantasy

37:22 Dirty talking fantasy

38:34 10 prompts for deeper conversations

==

Free resources + next steps for your sexual healing journey:

 

>> Download the free guide:

“10 phrases to start deeper conversations with your partner”

 

Listen to E16 on masculine/feminine polarity in relationships: on Apple or Spotify

Listen to E19 on threesome fantasies: on Apple or Spotify

 

For more info, visit www.deeperlovers.com

>> FREE LIVE WORKSHOP: "Finally Share your Secret Fantasies without Shame or Fear" << REGISTER HERE

Most people think the key to better sex and exciting relationships is learning the right moves or finding "The One".

In an interview with one of our teachers, Will and I talk about why the patterns that hold you back in bed are the same ones that limit you in life. Why lack of intimacy isn’t about the other person, the sex positions, or your performance. And why feeling stuck, unseen, or frustrated in your relationship often has deeper roots that go far beyond your partner’s behaviour.

Puja Lepp is an internationally sought after psychotherapist, retreat leader, and teacher. For over 30 years she has been supporting people through deep emotional healing and transformation. She is the founder of the Primal Childhood Deconditioning retreat, a seven-day immersive process designed to help participants access and release unprocessed emotions, break free from old survival patterns, and reconnect with their authentic selves.

In this episode she shares the powerful truth we’ve seen again and again in our own journey and with our clients: you can’t separate your relationship struggles from your personal healing. But when you start doing the work on yourself—when you drop the mask and learn to show up fully—that’s when everything begins to change.

==

TIME STAMPS

04:03 How Inner Work And Sexual Healing Are Deeply Connected

08:32 Is This Type Of Work For You? The Impact on Romantic Relationships

12:26 Is "working on yourself" really harder than "pretending" and wearing masks of perfection?

13:27 We All Fear Not Being Loved

16:13 We can't Force Our Partner To Do The Work

19:07 Why Feeling Safe Is Key For a Successful Relationship

19:42 How To Help Your Parter Feel Safe With You

22:38 "Doing The Work" Has a Domino Effect On Your Life as A Whole

23:46 Healing As a Lifestyle

24:12 Start By Changing 1% a Day

==

Resources and next steps for your relationship healing journey:

 

>> FREE DOWNLOAD: “10 phrases to start deeper conversations with your partner”

 

>> Apply to join our next retreat with Puja: https://www.pujalepp.com/  

 

Join Chiara's next live workshop "Finally share your secret fantasies without shame or fear"

 

 

What’s the thing that scares the shit out of most couples? Being seen for who they really are. And in sex? Sharing their fantasies.

What’s the one thing that sits underneath every fantasy, every risk, and every deeply connected relationship? It’s TRUST.

Most of us simply don't trust what will happen when we share ourselves completely.

So, today’s episode is all about helping you doing exactly that. We cover:

• the difference between fantasy and action
• the reasons why "convincing" your partner never works
• why a hard "no" today doesn't mean no forever
• how to talk about what turns you on without pressing your partner
• how the nervous system needs to hear something a few times before it stops treating it like a threat

The best relationships are not built on playing safe. They’re built on the kind of trust that lets two people tell the truth, stay close, explore, and grow together.

If you've been sitting on a sexy fantasy for a while but haven't found the way in yet, this episode is the conversation you need to hear – make it a date night to listen to it with your partner!

For more info, visit www.deeperlovers.com

==

TIME STAMPS

02:00 Free Fantasy Live Workshop Invitation

02:23 You Don't Know What You Don't Know

06:29 Challenging Times In A Relationship Don't Have To Be The End Of It

07:46 Trust Is What Changes Everything

10:01 What Are You Scared Of?

11:40 What Are They Going To Think?

13:08 How Chiara Felt Safe To Talk About Her Threesome Fantasy

14:42 The Secret Fantasies Workshop You Don't Want To Miss

15:19 How Do You Create Safety?

16:50 Is This A Relationship Worth Saving?

17:54 How To Know If You Should Turn Your Fantasy Into Reality

18:59 "I want to convince my partner to..."

22:09 Your Answer: Nervous System + Play

24:59 How To Find Your Voice

26:01 What Sops You From Sharing Fantasies

28:15 The Leap Of Faith To Trust

30:04 Ask Yourself This Question

==

More content about Sexual Fantasies:

>> E6 | There’s No Shame In “Dirty” Fantasies: How Speaking Them Out Loud Transforms Taboos into Passion – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E19 | Threesome fantasy? How to talk to your partner about it (and make it happen) – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E22 | How to share secret sexual desires and why we're turned on by taboos – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

JOIN CHIARA'S NEXT LIVE WORKSHOP: "How to share your secret fantasies and upgrade your sex life"

Save your spot: https://chiarahardie.com/secret-fantasies-workshop-signup

Most people fantasise about being with someone other than their partner. That’s normal. The question is what you do with it.

In this episode, we get into one of the most common — and least talked-about — sexual fantasies: desiring variety in sexual partners.

We cover what ENM (Ethical Non-Monogamy) looks like in practice – with all its various flavours - and how monogamous couples can safely explore this territory without anyone doing anything with anybody else. This is one of the many things that become possible when you learn to share fantasies with each other.

We also end up in a surprisingly good conversation about "having a type" — where it comes from, why biology explains far less of it than you'd expect, and what you might be missing out on if you keep yourself constrained to a rigid checklist of qualities to tick off.

==

TIME STAMPS

00:00 E25 Non-monogamy fantasy - having variety

01:25 Partners variety (ENM) is amongst the most common sexual fantasies

03:59 ENM structures: dating separately

04:32 ENM structures: dating together as a couple >> shared experience

05:08 ENM structures: polyamory

05:19 Fantasies as a tool to explore ENM for monogamous couples

07:15 How To Share Your Secret Fantasies - live workshop

08:32 Why variety is important

09:24 Is "having a type" blocking or expanding your relationship potential?

12:16 Why do we have "a type"?

15:31 Become aware of your own conditioning to access a wider dating pool

18:57 Awareness is key

25:20 Listen to your dreams

For more info, visit www.deeperlovers.com

==

Curious about better expressing and making your sexual fantasies happen? Don’t miss these episodes:

 

>> E19 | Threesome fantasy? How to talk to your partner about it (and make it happen) – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E22 | How to share secret sexual desires and why we're turned on by taboos – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E23 What's Really Cockblocking Your Wildest Fantasies (And How To Stop That) – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E24 Why Suppressing Your Fantasies Is Counter Productive – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

Book your free spot: Chiara’s Live Online Workshop “How To Share Your Secret Fantasies” – limited seats available

⚡️Join us live: Free Online Workshop “How To Share Your Secret Fantasies” - Limited spots available⚡️

What if the fantasy you've been hiding is the exact thing your relationship needs?

Most of us treat our desires like secrets — something to protect our partner from.

Today we are joined by Paris, a longtime tantric practitioner and facilitator who went from completely frigid to living out every fantasy she's ever had. She is one of Will and Chiara's main teachers.

In this episode we discuss:

🩶 why suppressing your fantasies makes them more obsessive, not less

🩶 how jealousy can turn into compersion (the opposite feeling to jealousy) — and what it takes to get there

🩶 the orgasm myths that's keeping millions of men and women from the best sex of their lives

🩶 tantric practices to expand genitals sensitivity and presence

🩶 how you transform your relationship when you start sharing out loud your desires

🩶 why men exploring their feminine side might be the sexiest thing you've ever witnessed (and how to get started)

🩶 the 21-day challenge that rewires how your body experiences pleasure

Sharing and going after your desires doesn't damage a relationship. It deepens it. Listen to this incredible episode to know how.

==

TIME STAMPS

02:57 It's Time To Normalise Fantasies

03:42 Free Fantasies Live Workshop Invitation

04:41 Do You Know Where The Man's G-spot is?

05:47 Why It's Important To Live Out Your Fantasies

07:50 Serving vs. Taking

09:10 We Are Wired To Be Attracted To Others!

10:29 Jealousy vs. Compersion

11:05 Deal With Your Childhood Issues First!

11:57 Jealousy Is About YOU, Not Them

12:20 Jealousy Is Often FOMO

14:24 Try This   Biohack For Porn Addiction

16:53 How To Stop Your Sexual Obsessions

18:11 Why Suppressing Your Sexuality Is Counter Productive

20:24 Find A Tantric Community Near You...

21:26 ...Or Get Really Good At Communicating

24:28 Let's Normalise Sexual Language

25:26 Embrace The Slut Within You (for men and women)

26:54 How To Experience More Pleasure ( Debunking Orgasm Myths)

29:07 How To Improve Your Sex Life

34:17 The 21 Day Challenge

35:06 The Allowing vs. Forcing Principle

37:51 Exploring Fantasies As A Doorway To Deeper Connection And Trust

44:47 Bi-curiosity And Shame

46:46 Threesomes As Doorways To Brotherhood

48:29 Our Top Tips For Today

==

For more info, visit www.deeperlovers.com

Paris & The New Tantra school: https://thenewtantra.com/

==

More episodes on the same topic:

 

>> E17 | How to get 10-minute long orgasms (for both men and women) - Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E19 | Threesome fantasy? How to talk to your partner about it (and make it happen) – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E22 | How to share secret sexual desires and why we're turned on by taboos – Listen on Apple or Spotify

 

>> E23 What's Really Cockblocking Your Wildest Fantasies (And How To Stop That) – Listen on Apple or Spotify