Journalist, author and broadcaster Sarah MacDonald has spent a lifetime telling other people’s stories — but in this episode of Agehood, she shares her own.

Sarah opens up about losing her beloved father, a gentle obstetrician who championed women through birth but didn’t get the gentle death he deserved. She reflects on what it meant to become his advocate in a hospital system that wasn’t prepared to let go, and the lasting impact of that experience.

Now in the thick of the sandwich generation — caring for both her mother and mother-in-law in their 90s with her young adult children living at home — Sarah speaks honestly about what life in the middle looks like.

FIND OUT MORE

If Sarah’s story resonated with you—and you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome to Agehood. The podcast  where we have the conversations that matter most but happen least often. 

Over the next 12 weeks, host Melissa Reader will sit down with some of Australia’s most trusted voices — from beloved broadcasters to leading experts — to talk about caregiving, aging, grief, and the invisible load carried by the sandwich generation.

But before we get to their stories, we wanted to begin with Melissa’s.

In this opening episode, Melissa shares why she started Agehood, the personal story that led her to found Violet, and why it’s time we stop avoiding the last chapter of life — and start preparing for it.

FIND OUT MORE

If Melissa’s story struck a chord—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dad’s had another fall. The kids are out of control. Your boss’s patience is wearing thin. No matter what you do, you feel like you’re letting someone down. And who is looking out for you?

Welcome to Agehood. This is the show for all the people who are caught between caring for ageing parents, raising a family, and managing work—all while trying to live a good life. Listen in as some of Australia’s most trusted voices share their stories of Agehood: the tears, the frustration, the goodbyes, but also the laughs and moments of true joy along the way. Coming soon. 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on Agehood, we’re having the conversation that matters most—but often happens least. Dr Kathryn Mannix is one of the world’s leading voices on dying well. As a former palliative care doctor, she's sat beside thousands of people at the end of their lives—and what she's learned might just change how you live yours.

In this gentle and powerful episode, Kathryn shares the real story of what dying actually looks and feels like—and why our fear is often worse than the reality. We talk about how to begin those difficult conversations, what people really want at the end, and how to support a loved one without losing yourself in the process. She shares the five phrases every family should know, why silence is sometimes the most compassionate response, and how we can turn grief into connection, even before death arrives.

Whether you're supporting ageing parents, caring for a sick partner, or simply curious about how to prepare for what lies ahead, this episode offers comfort, clarity and courage. Because talking about death isn’t morbid—it’s an act of love. And as Kathryn says, the end of life deserves just as much care as every other milestone.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

With thanks to Dr. Kathryn Mannix 

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Author and columnist Nikki Gemmell has never shied away from the hard conversations — and in this powerful episode of Agehood, she turns her lens inward.

Nikki opens up about the painful, unresolved grief of losing her mother by suicide, and the emotional aftermath of not being part of her end-of-life experience. She shares the guilt she still carries, how that moment reshaped her thinking around death, and why she’s determined to approach her own aging differently.

She also reflects on her experience supporting her father through the slow, confronting process of aging — and how witnessing his decline brought clarity about the kind of care, dignity, and control she wants for herself and her loved ones.

This is a conversation about control, courage, and care — and why planning for the end is one of the most radical acts of love.

Just a heads up, this episode deals with the topic of suicide. If you or someone you love needs help call Lifeline on 13 11 14

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

With thanks to Nikki Gemmell

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Australia is on the edge of a demographic cliff — and according to leading demographer Bernard Salt, we’re nowhere near ready.

In this episode of Agehood, Bernard joins host Melissa Reader to unpack the numbers behind our aging population, the rising pressure on families, and the looming care crisis that will land hardest on women in their 50s and 60s.

With his trademark clarity and insight, Bernard explains why the sandwich generation is growing, what the economic and emotional load of caring will look like over the next decade, and how we can start to prepare now — as individuals, families, and a nation.

It’s a wake-up call wrapped in data, empathy and urgency — and a must-listen for anyone navigating aging, caregiving, or planning for what’s next.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

With thanks to Bernard Salt

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Most of us have a conversation we keep avoiding – about ageing, about more help at home, about dying. In this week's episode, recorded live in Sydney, palliative care physician Dr Kathryn Mannix shows us how to have that tender conversation.

Recorded live at our Stay For Supper event, Sarah Macdonald sits down with Dr Kathryn Mannix — global campaigner, author of With the End in Mind and Listen, and palliative care physician — to discuss why these are tender conversations, not difficult ones, and how to start the ones we keep putting off with our ageing parents.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the conversation.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

This Week's Hack: Take the armour off, hand the authority back to your parent ("Mum, can you help me think this through?"), and then be quiet — for longer than feels comfortable.

Send this to: anyone bracing for a hard conversation with a parent, or a sibling who isn't quite there yet.

A moment that stays: Kathryn's "travel" metaphor for the end of life — when a dying parent talks about catching a bus or finding their ticket, go with them.

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader — CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble — Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg — GP and women's health advocate.
Dr Stephanie Ward — Geriatrician helping you understand the ageing brain.
Kerry Milligan — Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty.

Today's guest: Dr Kathryn Mannix: author of With the End in Mind and Listen: How to Find the Words for Tender Conversations. Free animated short, 'A Beginner's Guide to Dying', available at https://kathrynmannix.com. 

Content note: this episode discusses ageing, serious illness, dying and grief. If you'd like to talk to someone — Lifeline 13 11 14; Griefline 1300 845 745; Carer Gateway 1800 422 737.

Find Put The Kettle On – Vera's free guide to the five questions worth asking your mum or dad – at https://putthekettleon.com.au

With huge thanks to Altina Drinks for generously sponsoring our Stay For Supper evening. Visit https://altinadrinks.com.

This episode was supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

This episode was supported by NSW Trustee and Guardian — wills, power of attorney and enduring guardianship, sorted properly, so the people you love aren't left guessing. Search NSW Trustee and Guardian, or call 1300 10 20 30.

Vera is your candid companion as you care for an ageing parent. Have a look at https://vera.guide.

Credits:
Sarah Macdonald — Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader — Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Justin McArthur – Executive Producer.
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our theme music Club Sandwich — hear more at https://seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Dementia is the leading cause of death in Australia, and a lot of what we believe about it is making things worse. This week, meet the man who moved in. Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:
Our youngest guest yet. At 21, Dutch nurse Teun Toebes moved into the locked dementia ward of a nursing home and stayed three and a half years. Sarah Macdonald sits down with him on his first day in Australia to talk about what living alongside 130 housemates with dementia taught him: that the hardest part of the diagnosis is often not the disease, it's the way the world treats you once you have it. We don't lack beds or money, he says. We lack humanity.

This Week's Hack: Take them out, and keep showing up. Your parent may not remember the visit, but they remember the feeling. So do the drive, the cup of tea, the trip to the shops, even when it feels pointless. And when you don't know what to say or do, be okay with not knowing. Caring for someone with dementia is a shared job, not a solo one.

Send this to: Send this to your sibling, or to anyone who has stopped visiting because "they won't remember anyway." This is the episode that gently puts that one to bed.

A moment that stays: Teun takes his housemate Ellie to her son Marcel's house. She walks in, bursts into tears, and says, "Now I finally know where my son lives." She couldn't have told you the address. But she felt it.

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader — CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble — Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg — GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward — Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan — Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
- Why a 21-year-old nurse moved into a locked dementia ward, and what three and a half years taught him
- The "code of freedom": being the only resident who can open the door
- Why the stigma hurts more than the disease
- Identities change with dementia, but they are not lost
- The language problem: "brain gymnastics," "the restaurant of mistaken orders"
- How to be with a parent who has dementia, even when you don't know how
- Guilt, and why caring for someone with dementia is a shared responsibility
- "They remember the feeling, not the visit"
- Opening the locked doors: how 500+ Dutch care homes did it
- Over-medicalisation: thickener, walkers, hip airbags and protein drinks by default
- Quality of care vs quality of life
- "Use it or lose it": real knives, real plants, real dogs, real campfires
- Why one nursing home spent 10,000 euros a year on plastic plants
- The hospital-bed problem and the cost of standardising care
- Dementia as Australia's leading cause of death, and why that framing can backfire

Mentioned in this episode:

• Human Forever — Teun Toebes and Jonathan de Jong's award-winning documentary, touring Australia. Tour dates: 11 JUNE – MELBOURNE, 12 JUNE – BANGALOW, 13 JUNE – BRISBANE. To find out more, visit https://human-forever.com/join-the-movement/
• The Housemates — Teun's bestselling book about life on the ward.
• Teun's new book with Jonathan de Jong — out September 2026.

Credits:
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone.

This episode was supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.
This episode was supported by NSW Trustee and Guardian — wills, power of attorney and enduring guardianship, sorted properly, so the people you love aren't left guessing. Search NSW Trustee and Guardian, or call 1300 10 20 30.
Vera is your candid companion as you care for an ageing parent. Have a look at https://vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald — Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader — Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Justin McArthur – Executive Producer.
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our theme music Club Sandwich — hear more at https://seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Worried about an ageing parent ending up in hospital? Caring from another city or another country? In this episode, Sarah Macdonald and Matt Preston talk about dementia, sibling guilt, hospital overwhelm, aged care delays, and why the smartest move is to plan earlier than feels necessary. Matt also reflects on the personal experience behind his current TV work on dementia: supporting his mum through the disease before she passed away.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Matt Preston unpack what families need to know about geriatric wards, dementia, long-distance caring, and the emotional and practical load of caring for ageing parents. They also connect Matt’s current TV work on dementia with his own experience of supporting his mum through dementia before she passed away.

This Week’s Hack: Start the conversation before it is urgent. Ask about wishes early, get assessments underway early, and do not wait for a fall or hospital stay to force decisions.

Listener Letter: This episode speaks directly to the clubber juggling kids, work and ageing parents, especially if you are carrying the emotional load from a distance or trying to get siblings on the same page.

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when old becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:

• dementia is more than memory loss
  - what geriatric wards are really like
  - why older people are safer at home when possible
  - bed block, aged care waits and hospital stress
  - long-distance caring and fly-in guilt
  - sibling conflict and how not to make it worse
  - advanced care wishes and hard conversations
  - how to keep connection with a parent living with dementia
  - why women still carry most of the caring load
  - Matt Preston on ageing, fear and making the most of the years ahead

This episode was supported by Australian Unity, home health and care services. Proactive local care that helps your parents live well at home, less stress for them, less worry for you, and more time for the good stuff. Visit australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Find it in the show notes or at vera.guide.

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you do not have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If your parent is ageing and still saying “I’m fine”, this episode is your nudge to stop waiting for crisis. Sarah Macdonald and Gogglebox's Kerry Milligan talk about the conversations families avoid until it is too late: downsizing, wills, advanced care directives, aged care, death planning and the cost of denial.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode

The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Kerry Milligan dive into what it looks like to get on the front foot with ageing, and why future planning can make life easier for both parents and kids.

This Week’s Hack:

Do one piece of future planning this week: check your will, sort your advanced care directive, or get yourself into the aged care system before you urgently need it.

Hack #2:

Kerry reveals she already got herself assessed and into the aged care system after shoulder surgery, so support would be there if she needed it again.

Meet the regular Clubbers

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specializing in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when “old” becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode

Why 2026 is a turning point for Boomers and Gen X
Why denial makes ageing harder
Downsizing before the family home becomes a burden
Why Kerry says she will not live with her daughter
Wills, advanced care directives and making your wishes clear
Getting into the aged care system before crisis hits
How to make ageing less chaotic for your kids
What a death cafe is and what a death doula does
Why Boomers may need to reinvent aged care
Why asking for help actually makes things easier

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Australian Unity. Visit AustralianUnity.com.au/ClubSandwich

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera.guide, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don’t have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Feeling guilty all the time? Guilty you are not doing enough for your parent. Guilty you are not present enough for your kids, your partner or your job. Guilty for wanting a break. Guilty for even thinking this is all too much.

In this episode, Sarah Macdonald is joined by clinical psychologist Jo Lamble to tackle one of the biggest emotional burdens of sandwich generation life: guilt. They unpack the difference between guilt and remorse, why women are especially vulnerable to it, how guilt can morph into resentment, and the unspoken thoughts carers often feel ashamed to admit.

This is an honest, practical conversation about how to stop punishing yourself and start responding with more self-compassion.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:

The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Jo Lamble unpack why caregiving guilt feels so constant when you are caring for ageing parents, juggling work and family, and trying not to disappear yourself.

This Week’s Hack: Catch the guilt early and ask yourself: what would I say to a friend in this exact situation? Then say that to yourself.

Listener Letter: The unspoken question underneath this episode is brutally familiar - how do I know what I should feel guilty about versus what is just breaking me?

Hot Mess Moment: The guilt spiral that starts with one missed call or one hard thought and turns into feeling like a bad daughter, bad mother, bad partner and bad person.

Meet the regular Clubbers

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.

Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.

Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.

Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when “old” becomes a crisis.

Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics Covered in this episode

- guilt vs remorse

- caregiving guilt and the sandwich generation

- guilt about work, family and not doing enough

- self-care guilt

- guilt about moving a parent into aged care

- the taboo thought that you wish it would all end

- women, motherhood and why guilt hits harder

- parents who use guilt trips

- resentment as guilt’s best friend

- CBT, self-talk and self-compassion

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Australian Unity. Visit AustralianUnity.com.au/ClubSandwich

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera.guide, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don’t have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer

Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber

Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer

Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group

Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When your mum or dad insists everything is fine, but you can see the fall risk, the spoiled food, the missed cues and the slow slide, it can make you feel like you’re losing your mind. This episode is for the daughter who’s being called bossy when what she really is, is exhausted, worried, and carrying too much.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Dr Stephanie Ward dive into denial, resistance, dignity, autonomy, cognitive change, and how to help an ageing parent who refuses support.

This Week’s Hack: Don’t try to fix everything at once. Pick one concrete safety issue, revisit it gently, and frame support as something that helps you too: “Would you do this one thing for me?”

Listener Letter: Anjali, 58, is caring for her 84-year-old parents. Dad has had a fall. Mum can barely see the stove. Their house feels unsafe, but every suggestion of help is met with “No, we’re fine.” She wants to know how to face reality without destroying their dignity.

Hot Mess Moment: You’re over there four times a week, finding wilted food, mildew in the washing machine, and signs things are slipping, while the interstate sibling visits for a roast and says, “They seem fine to me.”

Meet the regular Clubbers:

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specializing in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when “old” becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humor and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered this episode: ageing parents in denial, refusing help, loss of independence, dignity of risk, cognitive change, dementia concerns, My Aged Care, caregiver burnout, sibling denial, safety at home, autonomy, how to talk to resistant parents

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Australian Unity. Visit AustralianUnity.com.au/ClubSandwich

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera.guide, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don’t have to do it alone. Download Vera's free "home is where the heart is: how to keep them there - practical field guide to navigating aged care" at clubsandwich.community/resources

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

They want to stay home. The hard part is making that possible.

In this episode, Sarah Macdonald and Melissa Reader talk about one of the biggest questions families face: how do you help an ageing parent stay at home for as long as possible, without waiting for a fall, a hospital stay or a full-blown crisis? They cover the emotional pull of home, the practical reality of care, and the steps that matter most if you want to plan early instead of scrambling later.

Home is where their heart is: access Vera's Field Guide for the Sandwich Generation here.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:

The Conversation:
Sarah Macdonald and Melissa Reader dive into what it really takes to help ageing parents stay at home longer, and how to start planning because “ageing happens slowly… until it doesn’t.”

🔧 This Week’s Hack:
Be there for the assessment, tell the truth, and make sure you’re registered as your parent’s support person.

💌 Listener Letter:
How do I help my parent stay in their own home without waiting for a crisis to make the decision for us?

🔥 Hot Mess Moment:
You don’t want to be in a hospital corridor at 2am discovering there’s a huge wait for care and no plan in place.

Meet the regular Clubbers:

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.

Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.

Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.

Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when “old” becomes a crisis.

Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
staying at home, ageing in place, My Aged Care, aged care assessments, Support at Home, CHSP, home modifications, family planning, denial, care at home, older parents, sandwich generation

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Australian Unity. Visit AustralianUnity.com.au/homehealth

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera.guide, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don’t have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If you’re caring for ageing parents and quietly thinking “I cannot keep going like this”, you’re not imagining it. Sometimes burnout is not a mindset. It’s your body calling in the debt.

Ageing Parents? You've got them, we've got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:

The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Dr Ginni Mansberg (GP and women’s health advocate) get brutally practical about what “real self-care” looks like in the sandwich years, and why midlife bodies hit a tipping point.

🔧 This Week's Hack: The minimum viable self-care reset:

1) Book a GP check-up and rule out the basics (iron, thyroid, sleep apnea, anything fixable).

2) Reset your sleep expectations and take snoring seriously (it can be a health issue, not just annoying).

3) Build one steady routine and a doable nutrition baseline (protein, fibre, calcium) without becoming a full-time meal-prep influencer.

💌 Listener Letter: Sharon asks how to spot burnout when her body has started rebelling after years of 10-hour days and caring for everyone else.

🔥 Hot Mess Moment: Sleep in your 50s, teeth grinding, snoring orchestras, and the myth that “good sleep” means eight perfect uninterrupted hours.

Meet the regular Clubbers:

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.

Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specializing in guilt and family dynamics.

Dr. Ginni Mansberg - GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.

Dr. Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand how we age.

Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:

- Carer burnout and the “body tantrum” warning signs

- Menopause, inflammation, and why midlife health can suddenly slide

- Cortisol myths, chronic stress, and what burnout can look like physically

- Sleep in your 50s: what’s normal, what’s not, and when to investigate sleep apnea

- Hypervigilance and insomnia (and why your brain won’t switch off at 3am)

- Real self-care basics: check-ups, routines, food, movement, and asking for medical help

- Brain health: routine plus novelty (learning new things without blowing up your life)

- A gentle nudge to rethink alcohol as “the only off switch”

Episode sponsor:

Altina Drinks - non-alcoholic craft wines for the end-of-day ritual. 15% off with code CLUBSANDWICH at altinadrinks.com

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life, so you don't have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer

Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber

Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer

Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group

Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ageing in an ageist society can feel confronting, especially when you are caring for older parents while navigating your own changing body, identity and future.

In this episode of Club Sandwich, Sarah Macdonald and Clubber Kerry Milligan (Gogglebox) explore how to age in an ageist culture, why invisibility can feel painful but also freeing, how body image and confidence shift over time, and how lived experience can become a source of strength. They also talk about age discrimination, mortality, proactive health, and the freedom that can come with getting older.

Kerry brings humour, honesty and hard-won perspective to a conversation that will resonate with women in midlife, carers, and anyone trying to age well without buying into fear, shame or impossible beauty standards. It is candid, warm and deeply relatable, with plenty of laughs, including Kerry’s very real “whisker watch” moment.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

Join the Club at clubsandwich.community
Send us your question: hello@clubsandwich.community

This episode of Club Sandwich is sponsored by Altina Drinks.

If you’ve been quietly reassessing your relationship with alcohol — not quitting, not announcing anything — just noticing… you’re not alone.

So many of us in midlife are realising it’s not even the alcohol we love — it’s the ritual. The glass at the end of a long caregiving day. Something that feels grown-up. A marker between chaos and rest.

Altina creates complex, layered, non-alcoholic drinks designed for adult palates. They feel special. They feel intentional. They feel like a proper pour.

You can explore Altina’s range at altinadrinks.com.

Topics include ageism, ageing women, ageing naturally, menopause, body image, visibility and invisibility, confidence in midlife, caring for ageing parents, mortality, proactive ageing and ageing well.

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you do not have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald is Host and Executive Producer.
Melissa Reader is Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer and Clubber.
Rachel Fountain is Executive Producer.
Audio and video edits by Fountain Media Group.
Theme music by Sean Wayland.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If you’re the sibling holding the whole system in your head and everyone else is “right behind you”… this episode is your permission slip and your playbook.

Sarah Macdonald and clinical psychologist Jo Lamble unpack sibling dynamics when you’re caring for ageing parents, including why one person becomes the default carer (and why it stays that way).

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

🔧 This Week’s Hack:
Stop the vague “I need help” plea. Use the specific ask script:
“I’m feeling overwhelmed and alone. Can you do [one clear task] on [day/time]?”
Then follow up with: “What can you realistically take on?”

💌 Listener Letter:
“The seating chart that broke me” - a listener plans a dementia-friendly family lunch, a sibling rearranges everything, Dad gets confused, and then she gets blamed. How do you manage family gatherings when some people live the daily reality and others only drop in?

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr. Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr. Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when “old” becomes a crisis.
Kerry Silbury (Gogglebox) - bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
Sibling conflict, finding an ally, delegation that actually works, the “capable one” trap, the critic sibling, the busy sibling, emotional overwhelm, dementia and family gatherings, unpaid labour, money conflict, carer burnout, self-care that isn’t a vanilla candle.

Credits
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don’t have to do it alone.
Sarah Macdonald: Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader: Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain: Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

One minute you’re living your life, and the next, you look at your parents and realise everything has changed. Whether it’s a sudden health event or a slow "crumble," navigating the aged care system while holding down everything else - work, kids, grandkids, or just your own sanity - is the hardest job you’ll ever do.

In this debut episode, host Sarah Macdonald is joined by geriatrician Dr. Stephanie Ward (Old People’s Home for 4-Year-Olds). They dive into the visceral reality of being "squashed" in the middle, the physiological changes our parents face, and why the Silent Generation and Baby Boomers present unique challenges for the Gen X carers looking after them.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode, we discuss:

• The "Squishy" Middle: Transitioning from the mosh pit to the layers of responsibility.

• Why Geriatrics? Dr. Stephanie explains the holistic "safe port" for older Australians.

• The Rumble: Understanding biological ageing and why it feels like it happens overnight.

• Ageism as Prejudice: Why we need to stop being patronising to our elders.

• Parenting in Reverse: Navigating the grief of shifting roles.

• Self-Care Corner: Sarah’s "funnel web" hospital trip and Dr. Stephanie’s double bass.

Meet the regular Clubbers:

• Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
• Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specializing in guilt and family dynamics.
• Dr. Ginni Mansberg - GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
• Dr. Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
• Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humor and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life — so you don't have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer

Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber

Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer

Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group

Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Caring for ageing parents and quietly thinking “Something’s gotta give”? Welcome. 

Because you’ve got them - and we’ve got you.

The Sandwich Generation is finally getting the conversation we deserve.

Club Sandwich is the community for those caring for ageing parents while juggling work, kids, relationships, and sanity. This is your tribe when family doesn't get it - or just isn't enough.

Hosted by veteran broadcaster Sarah Macdonald, Club Sandwich features clinical psychologists instead of life coaches, GPs instead of gratitude journals, and honest conversations about the relief-guilt paradox nobody else will touch.

Follow Club Sandwich on Apple and Spotify. Subscribe on YouTube. And send us your questions via email to hello@clubsandwich.community

Episodes include:
🔧 This Week's Hack - Actionable strategy you can use today
💌 Listener Letter - Real questions from Clubbers like you
🔥 Hot Mess Moments - Stories that make you feel less alone

🛠️ What We're Using - Resources and tools that actually help

Meet the regular Clubbers:

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera aged care platform (vera.guide) and expert on Australia's ageing crisis and system failures.

Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specializing in guilt, family dynamics, and the impossible decisions when every option has a cost.

Dr. Ginny Mansberg - GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight about what caregiving does to your body.

Dr. Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician and consulting expert for ABC's Old People's Home for 4 Year Olds, helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis—and when it doesn't.

Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox Australia star bringing humor, honesty, and hard-won perspective to impossible family situations.

No bubble baths. No bullshit. Just expert-led, community-first support for people who don't need another thing to feel bad about not doing.

Club Sandwich is more than a podcast - it's a movement. Join our private Facebook community, attend live events across Australia, and access free downloadable resources with every episode.

New episodes every Thursday.

Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe.

Topics covered: Caregiver guilt, sibling conflict, dementia care, financial planning, legal issues, family boundaries, burnout prevention, end-of-life decisions, self-care that actually works, navigating aged care systems, and the emotional toll of caring for ageing parents.

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life — so you don't have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald | Host + Executive Producer

Melissa Reader | Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber

Rachel Fountain | Executive Producer

Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group

Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sarah Macdonald and Bianca Dye on caring solo for a mum with dementia when you have no kids and no siblings to share the load – and why "I don't have children" doesn't disqualify you from the sandwich generation.

This week Sarah Macdonald is joined by broadcaster Bianca Dye: an only child, with no kids of her own, and the sole carer for her 81-year-old mum, who has Alzheimer's-form dementia.

Bianca keeps apologising for "complaining" because she doesn't have children, and Sarah sets her straight early: you don't need a kid to be in the sandwich generation. It's about layers of life – work, care, your own health – all squeezing at once. The two ex-radio women cover the lumpy, chunk-by-chunk reality of a parent's decline, the guilt of being away for work, the small daily battles (the stains, the moved pills, the TV remote), and the army of friends who keep Bianca standing.

There's a real hack in here too: you can be right, or you can be kind. Plus the practical lifelines – the Carer Gateway, Dementia Australia, home-care packages and the gap before they kick in, and looking at aged care before it becomes an emergency. And the part that will land hardest for a lot of our listeners: what it's like to nurture a parent who didn't fully nurture you, and how that can, strangely, heal something.

Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you.

Content note: This episode includes frank discussion of dementia and of a parent expressing suicidal thoughts. If you need support, Lifeline is on 13 11 14 and the National Dementia Helpline is 1800 100 500.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

This Week's Hack: "You can be right, or you can be kind." Bianca's friend gave her this line and she leans on it constantly with her mum. With a parent who has dementia, winning the factual argument (which song came first, whether there's a stain) costs you the relationship and changes nothing. Let it go.  

Some practical advice:
- use music as connection (people with dementia often light up and remember lyrics);
- carers can get their own free counselling through the Carer Gateway;
- call Dementia Australia (National Dementia Helpline 1800 100 500);
- start touring aged-care homes early so it's not a crisis decision (do the "sniff test" — see our aged-care episode);
- get a Vera guide for a human to walk you through the maze.

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader. CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble. Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg. GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward. Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan. Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
- Why you don't need kids to be in the sandwich generation — it's layers of life, not just children
- Being an "only child" in caring, even when you have siblings who've stepped back
- Friendship as chosen family — the army of friends who fill the gap
- A mum's Alzheimer's-form dementia diagnosis, and reading the geriatrician's letter
- "You can be right, or you can be kind" — letting go of being right
- Music as a way in for people with dementia
- When a small argument becomes a "trauma dump" — history surfacing under pressure
- Caring with your own load: perimenopause, ADHD, executive dysfunction ("I can't human for two")
- The guilt of being away for work and relying on neighbours and friends
- Decline in chunks, and how moving a parent can trigger a sharp drop
- ACAT assessment, the new home-care package levels (Level 8), and the gap before care starts
- Looking after a parent's mental health, while protecting your own
- Caring for a mum who wasn't always there for you (callback to the Mother's Day episode with Jo Lamble)
- The decision about residential aged care, and touring homes early (the "sniff test")
- Carer Gateway counselling, Dementia Australia, and getting a Vera guide

Credits:
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

This episode is supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care. Proactive local care that helps your parents stay independent and living well at home. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Discover more at https://vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald – Host and Executive Producer.
Melissa Reader – Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer and Clubber.
Justin McArthur – Executive Producer.
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Theme music 'Club Sandwich' by Sean Wayland. Hear more from Sean at https://seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Sandwich Generation is finally getting the conversation we deserve.

If you're feeling the squish, our new podcast Club Sandwich is for you.  It's the community for those caring for ageing parents while juggling work, kids, relationships, and sanity. This is your tribe when family doesn't get it - or just isn't enough.

And the best news is, Agehood host and Vera.guide CEO Melissa Reader is a Clubber too - and she's handing over the reins to Club Sandwich host, veteran broadcaster Sarah Macdonald.

Club Sandwich features clinical psychologists instead of life coaches, GPs instead of gratitude journals, and honest conversations about the relief-guilt paradox nobody else will touch.

Make sure you're following the podcast in your favourite app, and if you know someone going through it, grab their phone and sign them up too! Episodes will be here in your feed every Thursday from February 12.  More information coming very soon!

Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe.

Topics covered: Caregiver guilt, sibling conflict, dementia care, financial planning, legal issues, family boundaries, burnout prevention, end-of-life decisions, self-care that actually works, navigating aged care systems, and the emotional toll of caring for ageing parents.

Credits

Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life — so you don't have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer

Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber

Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer

Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group

Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Most of us know we should talk about the end of life - but almost none of us know where to start.

In this episode, Melissa Reader is joined by Dr Ira Byock, one of the world’s leading voices in palliative care, to explore how we can live and love more fully by facing what we often avoid. A physician, author, and global advocate, Ira has spent decades reminding us that illness and dying are not just medical experiences, they’re deeply personal ones.

Together, they unpack the four simple phrases that can transform our relationships - “Please forgive me. I forgive you. Thank you. I love you.” - and discuss why planning for life’s later chapters should come from trust and love, not fear.

This conversation also marks the launch of Violet’s Care Compass, a simple values-based tool designed to help families start these conversations early - around the kitchen table, not in the hospital corridor.  Because it’s never too early to talk about the end.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air - you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Dr Ira Byock

Executive & Audio Producer: Madeline Joannou - Mylk Media

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

For more information about Dr Byock's books, visit his website here.

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What does it take to face fear, to lead with love, and to truly care for others at their most vulnerable?

In this episode of Agehood, Melissa speaks with Professor Steve Robson - former President of the AMA, doctor, and son - about the lessons he’s carried from rural Queensland to the frontlines of Australian medicine. Steve shares what jumping out of planes taught him about fear, the Christmas conversation with his mum he’ll never forget, and why love should sit at the heart of every medical decision.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air - you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Steve Robson

Executive & Audio Producer: Madeline Joannou - Mylk Media

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When former NSW Minister Victor Dominello helped build Service NSW, he made government simpler for millions. But when his mum was diagnosed with dementia, he discovered just how broken the system still is.

In this powerful conversation, Victor shares the reality of being a son and brother in the thick of caring, the toll it’s taken on his family, and his vision for a future where bureaucracy doesn’t break us—but actually carries us. It’s personal, it’s political, and it’s a glimpse at what “Government 3.0” could mean for every family.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Victor Dominello

Executive & Audio Producer: Madeline Joannou - Mylk Media

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What happens when you get the call - the one that changes everything?
Author and journalist Casey Beros found out when her dad was diagnosed with mesothelioma. Overnight she became organiser, advocate, and round-the-clock carer, all while parenting two young kids.

In conversation with Melissa Reader, Casey talks about the heartbreak and humour of those years, the gaps in our health system, and the unexpected strength she discovered. Her book Next of Kin captures it all and offers hard-won guidance for anyone who will one day walk a similar path.
Her book Next of Kin is part love story, part survival manual. Whether you’re already caring for someone you love or see that chapter ahead, this episode is a guide and a companion.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Casey Beros

Executive & Audio Producer: Madeline Joannou - Mylk Media

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au and violetcares.com for the Care Compass.

For more information about Next Of Kin visit https://www.caseyberos.com/nok-book

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kate Carnell has seen ageing and end-of-life care from every angle – as a pharmacist, as Chief Minister of the ACT, as a founding voice of Beyond Blue, and now as chair of Violet, the organisation behind Agehood. But this conversation isn’t just about policy or health systems – it’s about families, choices, and the very human side of planning for the end of life.

In this episode, Kate shares why even the most capable families can find themselves unprepared, what she learned when her own parents reached their final chapter, and why the sandwich generation is under more pressure than ever. It’s a candid, practical, and compassionate look at what happens when love, logistics, and reality collide – and how we can do it better.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Kate Carnell

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When someone we love dies, our world shifts in ways we can’t always name. Too often we’re left to navigate grief without a guide, unsure of what to say, how to feel, or even what’s expected of us. Dr Emily Musgrove is a clinical psychologist who specialises in grief, loss and trauma — and while her expertise is invaluable, what makes her work so powerful is her deep understanding of our need to connect, to make meaning, and to be witnessed in our hardest moments. You may know Emily from The Imperfects podcast or her book Unstuck: A Guide to Finding Your Way Forward to the Life You Want to Live, where she brings warmth, clarity and compassion to a subject so many of us struggle to face.

In this conversation, Emily explains why grief isn’t something to be “fixed,” how ritual can help us honour what we’ve lost, and why there is no such thing as a hierarchy of grief. She shares insights on parenting through loss, holding space for others, and the quiet power of simply showing up. Whether you are grieving, supporting someone who is, or trying to understand this part of life a little better, this episode offers comfort and perspective — and above all, a reminder that none of us are truly alone in our grief.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Dr. Emily Musgrave

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Holly Ransom is best known as a globally recognised speaker, strategist, and CEO of Emergent — the woman who’s interviewed the Obamas, led a G20 Taskforce, and worked with some of the world’s biggest companies. But in this deeply personal conversation, she opens up about the loss of her beloved grandmother Dorothy — and how grief, for the first time in her life, brought her to her knees.

Holly shares the powerful lessons Dorothy taught her — about empathy, leadership, and doing the right thing, even when no one’s watching — and how those lessons are helping her navigate the complexities of midlife, caregiving, and the systemic gaps we face as our population ages. From grief and memory to workplace disruption and policy reform, this episode is a reminder that the most important leadership often starts at home.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Holly Ransom

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Zenith Virago is a death walker — someone who walks alongside people as they approach the end of life. For more than three decades, she’s supported individuals and families through death, grief, and everything in between — from the bedside to the burial, from the paperwork to the heartbreak. In this powerful and moving conversation, Zenith invites us to see death not as a medical event, but as a human one — something to be approached with presence, love, and participation.

Together, we explore the practical and emotional realities of end-of-life care, what it means to reclaim dying as a natural part of life, and how the “sandwich generation” can begin preparing — for our parents, for our children, and for ourselves. If you’ve ever felt unsure about what to do or say when someone is dying, or how to honour them when they’re gone, this episode is full of clarity, comfort, and unexpected strength.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Zenith Virago 

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Geraldine Doogue is one of Australia’s most respected journalists and broadcasters. And in this episode, Geraldine reflects on losing her husband, Ian Carroll, in 2011 — and the reality of walking beside someone you love through their final chapter. She talks openly about the moments of courage, the guilt that lingers, the memories that endure, and the relief of honouring Ian’s wish to die in hospital, not at home.

This is a conversation about love, loss, and the gift of presence. It’s also a reminder that the best death isn’t about where it happens — it’s about giving someone the dignity to choose.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Geraldine Doogue

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you.

This week Sarah Macdonald is joined by Dr Joanne Bennett from the Australian Catholic University, designer of the upcoming 'Thriving Without Driving' program, to unpack one of the most loaded conversations in the sandwich generation: taking the keys.

Together they map the three kinds of older drivers (the acceptors, the reluctants and the resistors), why stopping driving is associated with measurable spikes in depression, social isolation and cognitive decline, and why the conversation has to start years before there's a near miss – ideally in your parents' sixties, not after the dings on the bumper.

Practical hacks include: how to use the doctor as your ally, how to discreetly notify your state's licensing agency, when an occupational therapist driving assessment is worth the ~$800, how Uber Senior, taxi vouchers and community transport can keep your parent independent, and why grandkids might be the unsung heroes of the public transport transition.

Plus: the listener question from EJ, Sarah's "lost car at the shops" moment, and the dad-at-the-pub anecdote that captures the impossible tightrope every adult child is walking.

This one is for anyone white-knuckling the passenger seat.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:
This Week's Hack: "Use the system, don't be the system." You don't have to be the bad guy who physically takes the keys. Every state and territory has a licensing-agency helpline where you can report a driver you're worried about; they'll trigger a medical assessment. Pair that with a GP visit (you can ask to be in the room) and, where the verdict is contested, an occupational therapist driving assessment (~$800) that goes well beyond the 20-minute on-road test. Bonus hack: open an **Uber Senior** account – larger font, family can book and track rides.

Hot Mess Moment: Sarah's friend whose dad, after the keys were finally taken, made her drive him to the pub each week – then loudly introduced her at the bar as "my daughter, the one who stole my car and took away my life." She just smiled: "Hi everyone, call me Jane."

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader. CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble. Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg. GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward. Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan. Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
- Why 'taking the keys' is one of the hardest conversations in the sandwich generation
- The three kinds of older drivers: acceptors, reluctants, resistors
- License loss as grief (dual-process model of coping with bereavement)
- The health cost of stopping driving: depression 2x more likely, social isolation, cognitive decline
- Why to start the conversation early – in your parents' sixties, not after a crash
- Gateway conversations: triggers, near misses, "what does unsafe driving look like to you?"
- Self-regulation strategies: no night driving, shorter distances, familiar routes
- Newer, simpler cars with advanced driver assistance systems (ADAS)
- When your parent lacks insight
- Links to cognitive decline / dementia 
- Working with GPs and being in the room for the medical assessment
- How to discreetly notify your state's licensing agency
- Occupational therapist driving assessment (~$800) when the standard test is too easy
- Practical alternatives: Uber Senior, taxi concession vouchers (My Aged Care), community transport, on-demand public transport
-Why men in older generations often find license loss hardest
- Grandkids as the secret weapon for public transport and tech transition
- Dr Joanne Bennett's 'Thriving Without Driving' program (ACT Government-funded, with the website launching later in 2026)

Credits:
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

This episode is supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care. Proactive local care that helps your parents stay independent and living well at home. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Discover more at https://vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald – Host and Executive Producer.
Melissa Reader – Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer and Clubber.
Justin McArthur – Executive Producer.
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Theme music 'Club Sandwich' by Sean Wayland. Hear more from Sean at https://seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on Agehood, we’re diving into one of the biggest, hardest, and most universal experiences we’ll ever face: death. But not in the way you might expect.

Dr Hannah Gould is a cultural anthropologist and researcher at the University of Melbourne’s DeathTech Research Network who is reimagining how we mourn, memorialise, and find meaning in the end of life. Drawing on both her academic work and personal experience of losing her father at 23, Hannah brings a compassionate, curious, and refreshingly honest lens to the conversation.

If you’ve ever wondered what a “good death” looks like, or felt that our grief rituals aren’t quite enough, this conversation is a starting point.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Dr Hannah Gould 

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When Alex Lollback received a string of anxious late-night texts from her mum, she had no idea it would mark the beginning of a year that would upend every part of her life. As the executive producer of Ladies We Need To Talk and a mother of two, Alex was already stretched — but when her mum’s physical and mental health rapidly declined, she found herself thrust into the thick of the sandwich generation: raising young kids while becoming a full-time carer for a parent in crisis.

In this raw and generous conversation, Alex shares what it’s like to be “everything to everyone” — the living grief, the system failures, the burnout, and the impossible decision to move her beloved mum into residential care. If you’re quietly carrying it all, this episode will make you feel seen.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Guest: Alex Lollback from Ladies We Need To Talk 

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on Agehood, we’re joined by Kerry and Isabelle Silbery — the mother–daughter duo you’ll know from Gogglebox Australia. For eight seasons, they shared their lounge room (and lives) with the nation, alongside beloved family matriarch Emmie.

A few weeks ago, Emmie passed away following a long journey with dementia. In this deeply personal conversation, recorded shortly before her death, Kerry and Izzy reflect on what that journey has looked like — from the first signs of Emmie’s decline to the complex emotions of caregiving, the overwhelm of navigating aged care, and the grief that arrives long before goodbye.

Kerry speaks candidly about becoming Emmie’s primary carer, while Izzy shares what it’s been like raising young children in the midst of such profound change. Together, they offer a moving and honest look at love, loss, and the reality of ageing within a modern family.

FIND OUT MORE

If you’re caring for aging parents, navigating your own next chapter, or just trying to keep all the balls in the air—you’re not alone. At Violet, we offer free tools and support to help families navigate the last stage of life with care and confidence. Visit violet.org.au to start the conversation.

If you're supporting someone with dementia who is experiencing behavioural changes, you can also contact:

Dementia Support Australia

• Phone: 1800 699 799
  
  
• Availability: 24/7, 365 days a year
  
  
• Website: dementia.com.au

CREDITS 

Host: Melissa Reader

Executive Producer: Lize Ratliff

Find out more about Violet at violet.org.au

Agehood is the podcast that finally says what we're all thinking but rarely saying out loud. Hosted by Melissa Reader, CEO of Violet, we have the conversations that matter most: watching our parents age, being everyone's go-to person, the mess of love and duty, what it really takes to care for those we love, and yes, death, dying, and loss.

You'll hear Australia's most trusted voices, from beloved broadcasters to respected experts, vulnerably sharing their own stories alongside practical guidance that actually helps. This isn't about having all the answers—it's about asking the right questions and knowing you're not alone.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Former NSW Premier Bob Carr on losing his wife Helena, and the year of grief that followed. A long, honest conversation about bereavement.

Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you.

In 2023, Bob Carr's wife Helena died of an aneurysm in his arms in Vienna, after a night at the opera. She'd been his constant companion for more than 50 years. The former NSW Premier and Foreign Minister has written about it in his book, Bring Back Yesterday. This week Sarah Macdonald sits down with Bob for a long, honest conversation about losing a life partner. What grief actually feels like. Why it comes in waves, not stages. And what to do if you're caring for a parent who's just been widowed.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:

This Week's Hack: There's no time limit on grief. If you're caring for a widowed parent, your job is to be present. Get them talking. Listen for the stories you didn't know. Sit with the photograph albums. And pay close attention to what their partner did. The cooking. The driving. The banking. The washing machine. The second unmooring after a death is practical, not just emotional.

Listener Letter: Send this to a friend whose parent has been recently widowed, or to a friend in their own grief. No commentary needed.

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader. CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble. Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg. GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward. Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan. Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
- The pharmacy in Vienna, and being "banished to the world of bereavement"
- Who Helena was. Her career running a security printing business. Her smile. Her quiet strength.
- The night at the opera in Vienna, and the aneurysm
- Coming home alone with her ashes, and the year Bob walked the city
- Why grief comes in waves, not stages
- The empty house. The jar of honey in the fridge. The objects without animating force.
- What Helena did. The cooking, the driving, the internet banking, the washing machine.
- A metallic taste in the soul. C.S. Lewis on grief as slight concussion.
- The patience grieving people need, and the friends who expect you to "get on with it"
- Writing the book, and C.S. Lewis's fear of "snow piling on top of her"
- The books that helped: Joan Didion, Geraldine Brooks, Julian Barnes, Gabriel García Márquez
- Recruiting friends. Filling the diary as a survival tactic.
- For anyone caring for a widowed parent. Get them talking. No time limit. The photograph albums.

Mentioned in this episode:
- Bring Back Yesterday by Bob Carr
- The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion
- Memorial Days by Geraldine Brooks
- A Grief Observed by C.S. Lewis
- Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
- Levels of Life by Julian Barnes

Credits:
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

This episode is supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care. Proactive local care that helps your parents stay independent and living well at home. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Discover more at https://vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald – Host and Executive Producer.
Melissa Reader – Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer and Clubber.
Justin McArthur – Executive Producer.
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Theme music 'Club Sandwich' by Sean Wayland. Hear more from Sean at https://seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

86% of us never have this conversation with our ageing parents. So we built you a way in. Free guide at https://putthekettleon.com.au — and a podcast episode to walk you through it. Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:
The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Kerry Milligan model the five Put The Kettle On questions live — what makes a good day, what independence looks like, who can help with decisions, the life-matters stuff (will, advance care directive, power of attorney, enduring guardianship), and the story you'd want remembered. Then clinical psychologist Jo Lamble debriefs the conversation — where Sarah pushed too hard, where Kerry blanched, and how to keep it a kindness instead of an interrogation when you do it at home.

This Week's Hack: Start with the good. "Tell me what a good day looks like for you." Don't open with the will, the aged-care plan, or what they want at the funeral. Open with the bit they want to keep. The rest gets easier when they're already leaning in.

Listener Letter / Send-this-to: Send this to your siblings. Before any of you turn up at the kitchen table, agree which one of you is going to lead the conversation. Five voices around the table is an intervention. One voice with a cup of tea is a chat.

Hot Mess Moment: Kerry's idea of a good day — start in bed, swim, dance class, walk the dog, coffee with the girls, and then the "fancy man" for "a bit of horizontal tango." Sarah: "Probably too much information if you're doing this with a child." Kerry: noted.

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader — CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble — Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg — GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward — Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan — Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
- Why 86% of us never have this conversation — and why 70 is a good time to start
- The five Put The Kettle On questions, walked through live
- What makes a good day — and what your parent would hate to lose
- Independence, driving, and the dings on the car that tell you it's time
- Showering, toileting, packaged dinners and who you'd let help
- Who could speak for you when you can't speak for yourself
- Wills, advance care directives, power of attorney, enduring guardianship — the bits everyone skips
- The "I don't feel old enough yet" block — why even the most organised among us put one thing off
- Forever-young baby boomers and the trouble with imagining yourself at 87
- Why one sibling, not all of them, should lead the chat
- Reading the room — when to push, when to put another kettle on
- A free guide so you can do this at home — https://putthekettleon.com.au

Mentioned in this episode:
Put The Kettle On — free guide at https://putthekettleon.com.au
Stay For Supper with Dr Kathryn Mannix — Tuesday 2 June, Sydney. Tickets at https://clubsandwich.community or search "Stay For Supper" on Humanitix.

Credits:
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

This episode was supported by Australian Unity Home Health and Care — proactive local care that helps your parents stay independent and living well at home. Visit https://australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Sometimes you need a debrief. And sometimes you need a plan. Vera is your candid companion as you care for an ageing parent — turns the system into a few clear next steps, and walks beside the conversations that are hardest to start. No forms. No pressure. Just plain words and a steadier next step. Have a look at https://vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald — Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader — Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Justin McArthur — Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich — hear more from Sean at https://seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Sandwich-generation carers don't get a holiday — not even on Mother's Day. Ageing parents? You've got them. We've got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:
The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and clinical psychologist Jo Lamble unpack the relationship shift nobody warns you about — when your mum stops worrying about you and starts needing you. They cover role reversal, unfiltered comments, re-triggered old wounds, the sibling who flies in like royalty, caring for mums who weren't there at all, and the long tail of Mother's Day grief.

This Week's Hack: Compartmentalise. Have shower time / scream time. Acknowledge the pain. Then close the box and be the person you want to be.

Listener Letter / Send-this-to: Send this to a sibling — let Jo Lamble say what you've been trying to say for months. Or send it to a friend who's about to have a hard Mother's Day.

Hot Mess Moment: Sarah's mum at the eye doctor announcing — loud enough for the whole shop — that "we got that thing because we were r*ped by Vikings."

Meet the regular Clubbers:
Melissa Reader — CEO of Vera and expert on Australia's ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble — Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg — GP and women's health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward — Geriatrician helping you understand when "old" becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan — Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode:
- The sudden shift from being cared for to caring
- Role reversal — doing up your mother's seatbelt
- When personalities harden (or soften) with age
- The lucky few — when your mum was your rock
- When caring re-triggers old wounds and old patterns
- Compartmentalising — shower time, scream time
- When your mum loses her filter
- When she rewrites your history
- The sibling who flies in like royalty
- Caring for a mum who wasn't there for you
- Why Jo Lamble hates the word "boundaries"
- Mother's Day grief that doesn't end
- Making Mother's Day about you too — even just for 20 minutes

Credits:
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don't have to do it alone.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Discover more at vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald — Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader — Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Justin McArthur — Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by P. Zinner Podcasts (https://pzinner.com.au)
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich — hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If a glass of wine has become your shortcut from caregiving stress to “I can finally exhale”, this episode is for you.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.

SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode:

The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Melissa Reader talk honestly about alcohol in midlife, especially for women caring for ageing parents while juggling work, family, stress and the mental load of everyone else’s needs. They unpack why alcohol became such a normal coping tool for Gen X, why it can stop working in midlife, what it does to sleep, and how to build new rituals for the hardest hour of the day.

This Week’s Hack: Replace wine o’clock with time o’clock. Build a deliberate non-alcoholic ritual for the hardest part of the day, whether that is a proper mocktail, a walk, exercise, or something else that genuinely helps shift your energy.

Hot Mess Moment: Melissa shares the family gathering that went pear-shaped, and the two strong gin and tonics that followed.

Meet the regular Clubbers
Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specializing in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when “old” becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humor and honesty to the sandwich generation.

Topics covered in this episode
* midlife women and alcohol
* caring for ageing parents and stress
* why Gen X grew up drinking this way
* wine o’clock and the sandwich generation
* alcohol, hormones and sleep
* why alcohol can stop working in midlife
* ritual, habit and stress relief
* non-alcoholic alternatives
* mocktails and replacement rituals
* how to slow the day down without a drink

This episode was supported by Australian Unity, home health and care services. Proactive local care that helps your parents live well at home, less stress for them, less worry for you, and more time for the good stuff. Visit https://www.australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Credits
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you don’t have to do it alone.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit https://clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when old becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

This episode was supported by Australian Unity, home health and care services. Proactive local care that helps your parents live well at home, less stress for them, less worry for you, and more time for the good stuff. Visit https://www.australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Discover more at https://vera.guide.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Trying to work out aged care in Australia before you are forced into it? This episode is your practical starting point. Sarah Macdonald and Linda Mellors break down how aged care works, what My Aged Care actually does, when to start, what home care packages mean, and how to make early decisions that can save families stress later.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

In this episode
The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Linda Mellors unpack aged care in Australia, from My Aged Care and assessments to home care packages, aged care at home, and how families can start planning before crisis hits.

JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

Melissa Reader - CEO of Vera and expert on Australia’s ageing crisis.
Jo Lamble - Clinical psychologist specialising in guilt and family dynamics.
Dr Ginni Mansberg - GP and women’s health advocate who tells it straight.
Dr Stephanie Ward - Geriatrician helping you understand when old becomes a crisis.
Kerry Milligan - Gogglebox star bringing humour and honesty to the sandwich generation.

This episode was supported by Australian Unity, home health and care services. Proactive local care that helps your parents live well at home, less stress for them, less worry for you, and more time for the good stuff. Visit australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Discover more at vera.guide.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Are your parents living longer, but not necessarily living well? In this episode, Sarah Macdonald talks with author Lucinda Holdforth about the private thoughts many carers have but rarely say out loud: what happens when old age stretches on, frailty deepens, dementia changes the person you love, and the caring role starts to swallow your own life.

Ageing parents? You’ve got them. We’ve got you.

Join / contact
JOIN THE CLUB: Visit clubsandwich.community to join the tribe, access resources, and find our private Facebook community.
SEND US YOUR QUESTION: hello@clubsandwich.community

In this episode
The Conversation: Sarah Macdonald and Lucinda Holdforth unpack the emotional, practical and political reality of longer lives: dementia, chronic illness, caregiving overload, driving, advance care directives, assisted dying, and the urgent need to move from life at all costs to live well and die well.

This Week’s Hack:
Do the advance care directive early, but do not stop there. Make sure your family knows what it says, where it is, and how it will actually follow your parent into hospital or aged care when a crisis hits.

Listener Letter:
This episode speaks directly to the clubber who loves their parent deeply but is quietly wondering how much longer they can keep doing this, or who has heard Mum or Dad say “I’m done” and had no idea what to say next.

Hot Mess Moment:
Your parent is back in hospital after another fall. You are exhausted, scared, trying to make sense of medical language, and having the thought you feel ashamed to say out loud: are we helping them live, or just helping them go on?

Topics covered in this episode

• why Australians are living longer and what that means for families
• the 12-year burden of chronic illness and disability
• dementia, frailty and the long goodbye
• the emotional toll of years of caregiving
• the administrative burden of advocating for ageing parents
• when driving becomes dangerous and taking the keys feels impossible
• ageism versus the structural tilt of wealth and policy
• whether sandwich generation women ever get to “live their own life”
• assisted dying, a “completed life”, and end-of-life choice
• why advance care directives often fail in practice
• how hospitals default to treatment and intervention
• the case for moving from “life at all costs” to “live well and die well”

Sponsored by:
This episode was supported by Australian Unity, home health and care services. Proactive local care that helps your parents live well at home, less stress for them, less worry for you, and more time for the good stuff. Visit australianunity.com.au/clubsandwich.

Need more clarity at 3 AM? Vera gives you a structured 15-minute voice conversation to help you understand where your parent stands and what to do next. Find it in the show notes or at vera.guide.

Credits
Club Sandwich is brought to you by Vera.guide, helping families caring for ageing parents navigate this stage of life so you do not have to do it alone.

Sarah Macdonald - Host + Executive Producer
Melissa Reader - Commissioning Editor, Executive Producer + Clubber
Rachel Fountain - Executive Producer
Audio + video edits by Fountain Media Group
Thanks and kudos to Sean Wayland for our awesome theme music Club Sandwich - hear more from Sean at seanwayland.com

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.