Blended Family Breakthrough – Détails, épisodes et analyse

You’re the parent, or stepparent, who wants less conflict and more connection. But a child’s resistance, sarcasm, isolation, or hurtful words, such as: “you’re not my dad,” can derail plans and result in hurtful interactions. 

We’ve been there.

In part 2 of this mini-series, you'll discover how to respond well in tough moments of pushback by using John Gottman’s 5 steps of Emotion Coaching. You’ll hear us role-play around real-life pushback when a child is competing for a parent's love, making accusations and threats, and behaving oppositionally toward a stepparent.

We'll offer a better way to manage those moments with words that help kids feel seen, heard, and understood.  We'll also show you the best approach for addressing poor behavior and setting boundaries. 

The plan is simple: notice the emotion, treat it as an opportunity, listen and validate, help label feelings, then set limits while exploring solutions. Practice this, and you’ll be surprised at how you can lower the tension, build relational safety, and strengthen your connection with a struggling child. 

When pushback hits, it is possible to move away from reacting in ways that don't help and instead, create an atmosphere of mutual trust, respect,  and real connection in your home.

You'll Discover:

• The 5 Emotion Coaching steps from John Gottman (with wording you can steal) and why each step matters. 
• How to decode what’s going on underneath pushback and respond in a way that helps your child move through pain, loss, anger, sadness, and confusion. 
• When and how to set behavioral boundaries so that kids are more open to receiving and responding well. 
• A simple script for stepparents to defuse “You’re not my dad/mom” moments while building mutual respect and understanding. 
• When and how to engage in problem-solving with your child and foster real buy-in, confidence, and trust.

Resources from this Episode:

• Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child by Dr. John Gottman
• Episode 222. Step-by-Step Guide: Facing Painful Pushback Without Making Things Worse [Part 1]
• Episode 194.  Powerful Tips for Effectively Connecting with Your Angry or Distant Child [with Dr. Amy J.L. Baker]
• Episode 195.  Connecting with Kim's HARD Child - Facing the Challenges of Parental Alienation
• Episode 210.  Is Your Child Pulling Away?  Here's How to Respond with Wisdom and Love
• Episode 211. 8 Warning Signs Your Ex is Manipulating Your Child's Heart and Mind
• Episode 92.  At a loss and feeling defeated because the kids stubbornly refuse to blend?
• Episode 132. How do loss and grief impact blended family integration?
• Episode 189. Bringing Hope to the Realities of Grief:  A Path to Understanding and Healing [with Krista St-Germain]

Ready for some extra support?   Schedule your free coaching call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

We know that pushback moments can sting. Eye rolls, refusals, accusations, or shutting down are all things kids in blended families can tend to do. It’s easy for parents and stepparents to appease, minimize, deflect, control, try to 'fix-it' or simply avoid pushback (we’ve done it too). 

In this two-part series, we act as your guides and name the real struggle beneath kids' hurtful behavior: loss, grief, and fear that come with blending. Then we introduce a clear plan: Emotion Coaching. 

You’ll hear real-life scenarios, why common reactions backfire, and what to do instead to help your child feel seen and supported. The win? A calmer home,  stronger bonds, and practical steps forward. 

The risk of doing nothing? Escalating conflict, shutdown, resentment, and power struggles. If you’re ready to respond to your child's pushback with calm, clarity, and care, this conversation is for you.

You'll Discover:

• The four common Pushback Predicaments: competing for love, accusations/threats, oppositional attitude, and loss & grief. And what’s really going on underneath. 
• Why appeasing, minimizing, deflecting, defending, controlling, or avoiding often makes things worse, and what kids hear when we react in those ways. 
• How Emotion Coaching helps kids identify and name big feelings, regulate their emotions, and become receptive to changing their behavior.  Plus, the blended-family benefits (safety, trust, and respect). 
• A simple reflection challenge to build awareness around your typical reaction patterns and your child’s reactions to your reactions, so that you can choose a better way to respond next time. 

Continued Learning on this Topic:

• Episode 154. What practical and emotional shifts can you expect as you blend your family?
• Episode 213. Discover How to Better Understand and Connect with Children of Divorce [with Lauren Reitsema]
• Episode 159.  How to Stay Hopeful as a Stepparent When You're Continually Rejected and Hurt
• Episode 37. Why do kids struggle to accept their stepparent?
• Episode 039. How to Create Strong Bonds with Resistant Stepkids

Ready for some extra support

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence, and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Resources

Surviving & Thriving in Stepfamily Relationships by Patricia Papernow

Episode 217. Feeling Overwhelmed and Powerless?  How to Regain Hope with Tools that Heal [with EJ and Tarah Kerwin]

Episode 139. The Most Common, Challenging Pain Point Every Blended Couple Experiences

Episode 206. Avoid These 5 Common Pitfalls to Ensure a Successful Partnership

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question  

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence, and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/free-call

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us to read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Resources from this Episode

Article by Nick Wignall:  What Causes Perfectionism and How to Get Over It
Episode 84. How to Cope with Sadness, Anxiety and Longing While Your Kids are Gone
Episode 81. How a Missing Bio-Parent Impacts Kids in the Delicate Blending Process (Part 1 of 2)
Episode 168. Actionable Steps For Helping Kids Navigate Through Difficult Emotions and Problem Solve  

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question  

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/free-call

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Have you ever felt like the holidays in your blended family are fraught with more challenges than there should be?

It might seem like when the holidays hit, you get bombarded with chaotic schedules and difficult negotiations with Exes.  The kids have high expectations and so do you — which just adds to the pressure. 

Relational tension and stress seem all too common as blended families struggle to cope with holiday hang-ups and disappointments.

But that's not the whole story…

…it's also possible to experience fun, connection, and joy through the holidays.

In this episode, you'll hear from our friends Rich and Stacy who have been blending their holiday experiences for 12 years.  They'll share a few of their highs and lows and how they've learned to navigate the challenging dynamics of blended family holidays.

Rich and Stacy offer some real-life strategies and mindset shifts that will help you to intentionally prepare for the holiday season with greater understanding, realistic expectations, flexibility, and the right perspective — without sweating the small stuff or getting hung up on having to get everything perfect!

You'll Discover:

• What it takes to navigate the holidays well and experience more fun, connection, and joy.
• Proactive strategies and mindsets that foster success leading up to - and during - the holiday season.

Resources from this Episode:

• Episode 151. What Has The Potential to Steal Your Joy - And How Can You Hold Onto It (Part 1 of 2)
• Episode 150. The Highs and Lows of Our Family's Holiday Experiences - with Special Guests: Our Kids
• Episode 149. How to "Blend" Holiday Traditions and Create Meaningful Connections This Season
• Episode 148. 5 Tips to Negotiate Holiday Plans and Avoid Scheduling Conflicts with the Ex
• Episode 118.  Meaningful Insight and Practical Strategies to Help Your Blended Family Navigate Holiday Challenges
• Episode 71. How to Help Kids Cope with Painful Holiday Disappointment
• Episode 12. 4 Meaningful Insights for Budgeting Your Happy Holidays
• Episode 10.  8 Practical Tips for a Successful Holiday Season

 Ready for some extra support?

 We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

As I mentioned in this Simple Step, we encourage you to head back to Episode 67 to dive into more ideas on how to live out this simple strategy in your co-parenting dynamic.  Here's the link:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/podcast/067

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question  

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/free-call

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

You probably know that kids moving between two homes thrive when all the adults — in both homes — cooperate to create stability and peace.  

That's absolutely true.  

It's also true that the adults (both bio and step-parents) thrive when trust and consideration exist between homes and tension is low.

But when it comes to the art of healthy co-parenting, talk is cheap.  

Misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and communication breakdowns are hard to avoid.  And they tend to shatter the peace for kids and adults in the delicate dynamics of co-parenting.

We all need more than just talk — or information about co-parenting.  What we really need is transformation.  

And the great news is that transformation is possible!  

A few simple strategies and a little mindfulness go a long, long way in reducing drama and cultivating peaceful cooperation. You can proactively avoid and recover from the most common co-parenting pitfalls.  

In this episode, we share some helpful tips for both bio and step-parents to improve co-parenting relationships so that everyone can enjoy more cooperation and peace!

You'll Discover:

• Practical strategies for both Step and Bio Parents to help avoid the pitfalls of milestone mishaps and cultivate more cooperation, trust, and peace between homes.

Resources from this Episode:

• Episode 112. 3 Dangerous Dynamics That Can Destroy Co-Parenting - and Hurt the Kids
• Episode 113. How to Respond When You're Being  Disregarded, Devalued and Dismissed by Your Former Spouse
• Episode 131. Why is Trust Important in Your Co-parenting Relationship

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Resources for this Episode

Episode 169. Real Insight and Advice for Remarried Parents AND Their Concerned Adult Children

Episode 147. Do sensitive conversations end up creating conflict in your relationship

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question  

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/free-call

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Stepfamily expert Ron Deal says, "Never mind that your children are adults, this is a hard transition for them because it comes at a great cost".

In this episode, we'll uncover the challenging family issues that often come up when a parent with adult children chooses to remarry or become romantically involved.  

We'll explore these sensitive issues from two unique perspectives.  The perspective of the parent who is struggling to understand why their adult child is reacting emotionally to their decision to remarry…

…AND…

…from the perspective of the adult child who could be experiencing painful emotions as they struggle to accept their parent's remarriage.

This episode is an opportunity for parent and adult child to help ease tensions, preserve your relationship, and take a step forward as a family.

You'll Discover:

• Valuable insight and understanding around the perspective of everyone in your family
• Practical tips for communicating,  maintaining connection, and moving beyond the tension

Resources from this Episode:

• Episode 168. Actionable Steps For Helping Kids Navigate Through Difficult Emotions and Problem Solve
• Episode 72.  The Best Way to Create Healthy, Bonded Relationships 
• Episode 140. Blending with Adult Children - One Couple's Story of Heartache and Triumph
• Episode 118. Meaningful Insight & Practical Strategies to Help Your Blended Family Navigate Holiday Challenges
• Book by Lauren Reitsema:  In Their Shoes - Helping Parents better understand and connect with children of divorce

 Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!

Suggest a Topic or Ask a Question  

Would you like us to discuss something specific or answer your question on the show?  Let us know!

We've made it easy.  Just click here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/share

Ready for some extra support?

We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help.  You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence and connection in your home.  Schedule your free call here:  https://www.blendedfamilybreakthrough.com/free-call

Subscribe or Follow the Show 

Are you subscribed or following the podcast yet?  If not, we want to encourage you do that today so you don't miss a single episode.  

Click here to subscribe in Apple Podcasts

Click here to follow on Spotify

Leave a Review in Apple Podcasts

If you’re feeling extra helpful, we would be so grateful if you left us a review over on Apple Podcasts too. Your review will help others find our podcast — plus they’re fun for us read too! :-)  Just click here to Review, select “Ratings and Reviews” and then select “Write a Review” — let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is.  Thank you, we really appreciate your feedback!