We’ve all got secrets...and with the cover of anonymity, ClosetEd invites you to listen in as other people divulge their juiciest ones. We live in a prescriptive society. We’re told what to wear, who to love, how to be “normal." But behind closed doors—let’s be honest—we’ve all got freak flags to fly. Join host Samia Mounts as she uncovers the joy, the pain, the relatable, and the sexy-as-hell, in her conversations with anonymous guests about their shocking and salacious adventures. Turns out the closet is a lot bigger than we thought.

You can listen to ClosetEd on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Liz has the perfect life: gorgeous husband and kids, big house in the suburbs, a successful career, a white picket fence. You’d never know looking in from the outside that she and her husband, Dex, have never been monogamous.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mina is a young South Korean woman who lives with her parents and knows how to fit in to conservative Korean society…but in her private life, she spends plenty of afternoons and evenings in love motels with her menagerie of lovers.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Katie is a 50-something twice-divorced mother of adult children who works as a teacher and loves helping her students reach their highest potential. You’d never know from her clean-cut look and wholesome vocation that she has threesomes with her friends in her free time, and that she never wants another live-in partner again. In this cultural moment, perimenopausal women shedding the chains of male-centered relationships are in the spotlight, and Katie is living her happiest life and feeling free to be herself for the first time. Season finale.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

A between-seasons announcement from ClosetEd host, Samia Mounts. 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Luna Robbie is an artist, podcaster, sex worker, and magical enchantress who had me charmed from the very beginning of our delightful hour-long conversation. Her podcast, Sex Stories, is a deep dive into the naughtiest secrets of her anonymous guests and has been releasing episodes for seven years, and her work as a courtesan at Sheri's Ranch in Nevada has helped inform (and finance) her mission to use judgement-free, sex-positive conversations to spread "ripples of love" throughout the world. In this interview, we discuss Luna's origin story of feeling rejected and confused about sex, how she once shaved her head and traveled in South America for six months to figure out why she was so unhappy, why she eventually started her podcast, and how getting the gig at Sheri's Ranch was something she and her BFF did together on a whim. Check out Sex Stories and all things Luna at www.sexstoriespodcast.com.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Kathy Kay is the anonymous host of the Strictly Anonymous Podcast, where anonymous guests call in and reveal their sexiest secrets, and she is an absolute delight to talk to about all things sex. I frickin' love herrrr! In this episode, we talk about Kathy's origin story and how she grew into the sex-positive, non-judgemental vixen she is today, her take on what is actually normal in human sexuality (hint: there IS no normal!), and we dive into some of the wildest stories from her new book, Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers, available for purchase wherever books are sold (link to purchase on Amazon below).

Follow her on Instagram at @strictanonymous.

Buy Kathy's book on Amazon: https://a.co/d/f14QDRu 

Subscribe to the Strictly Anonymous Podcast: https://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com 

Follow ClosetEd wherever you get your podcasts! Links to major platforms here: www.linktr.ee/samia.mounts ClosetEd on Instagram: @closetedwithsamia Samia on Instagram + TikTok: @samia.mounts

Love ya, pinecones. :)
xoxo,Samia

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Hey hey, pinecones, Samia here. I've brought you so many stories from other people's lives, but haven't shared that much with you about my own life. This cannot stand! Nay! In order to correct this tragic imbalance, here is the first in a mini-series in which I'll be sharing with you bits and pieces of my own personal origin story. Enjoy, and let me know if you have thoughts or questions by emailing me at closetedpodcast@gmail.com.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Amanda Dames is a certified sex and relationship coach who specializes in helping couples navigate kink dynamics within their relationships. She's also a prolific content creator, with a Substack, popular accounts on Instagram and TikTok, and a podcast of her own, The Kink Consultant, available wherever you get your podcasts. In this bonus episode, we discuss Amanda's origin story, from her days working on Wall Street while moonlighting as a professional dominatrix, to her decision to leave corporate America to pursue sex and relationship coaching full time. We talk about how big the umbrella of kink really is, and how many common sexual practices and desires fall within it. She gives us a primer on different styles of kink, and finally, we discuss how aftercare can be a healing way to come out of any sexual encounter, not just kinky ones. Amanda is a DELIGHT! I hope you enjoy listening to this conversation as much as I enjoyed having it.

Here are links to find all things Amanda Dames:
Book a session with Amanda: www.amandadames.com
The Kink Consultant Podcast on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3psOpSZMQQYm2cN69bIKwc
The Kink Consultant Podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-kink-consultant/id1766435920
Listen to Episode 15 featuring Amanda's mom: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6OLd924TDNXOlmvg7o68N1?si=qgoJ2UH8SB20yqwwP6GcZA

Subscribe to Amanda's Substack: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/

Follow Amanda on Instagram and TikTok: @the_kinkconsultant

I'll be back next Wednesday with another saucy drop! Follow me on IG and TikTok @samia.mounts and the show on IG @closetedwithsamia, and please oh please let me know your thoughts and wishes and dreams in comments and DMs, or email me at closetedpodcast@gmail.com. I read and respond to every comment and email myself and I love hearing from you!
xoxo,Samia

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Because I'm a curmudgeon who hates Christmas, here is something to tickle your earholes that has nothing to do with any of the winter holidays! An audio essay about why I identify as nonbinary, for your listening pleasure.

If you'd like to see the written version, check it out on my Substack:
https://samiamounts.substack.com/p/why-im-nonbinary-and-you-can-too

And while you're there, subscribe to my Substack! Get in now while it's still 100% free!

Happy unspecified winter holiday to all of you saucy little pinecones!
xoxo,Samia

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Just dropping into your feed right quick to wish all you sexy babies a very happy and safe New Year's celebration! I'll be back next week with another yummy interview, but for now, party well, don't drink too much (it's bad for sex!) and enjoy the chillest week of the year. I hope you're all surrounded by loved ones, laughter, and deliciousness!

xoxo,Samia

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

This week, I bring you my fascinating conversation with the adult sex educator, Kenneth Play, whose Beyond Satisfied Pro video course I've been advertising on this show since the beginning. Kenneth is the real deal: attuned, curious, determined, and passionate, he's made being a good lover his life's work, and he wants to help you have more earthshattering experiences, too. In this interview, we discuss Kenneth's origin story, some of his best pro tips for toe-curling sex, and his openly polyamorous marriage to his wife, Karen, and navigating her having a child with her other husband, Geronimo. It's juicy, thought-provoking stuff, pinecones!

For all things Kenneth: www.kennethplay.com (warning: not suitable for work!)
Get a 15% discount on Kenneth's Beyond Satisfied Pro course: www.kennethplay.com/closeted
Follow me on Instagram and TikTok @samia.mounts
Follow the show on Insta @closetedwithsamia
Watch video episodes on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@closeted-with-samia

Thank you as always for your support! None of this would be possible without you.
xoxo,Samia

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Jason is a devout Christian, a loving father and husband, and a registered Republican who works in constitutional law. He’s also polyamorous, loves his girlfriend, and has a deep bond with his wife’s boyfriend.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

This week, I'm bringing you my feisty, flirty, rambly conversation with comedian and podcaster Billy Procida, host of the Manwhore Podcast, in which he has vulnerable, funny, sex-positive conversations with all sorts of fascinating people. I have become a devoted listener. Billy also hosts the Naked Comedy Show, which is exactly what it sounds like and has monthly shows in Brooklyn (next one is February 12, 2026), as well as upcoming shows in LA (Jan 17, 2026) and Philadelphia (Feb 14, 2026). More info and tickets available at manwhorepod.com.

In this interview, we discuss Billy's origin story as a kid who got bullied a lot and how he grew up to be a guy with enough confidence to do stand-up comedy naked and show up regularly to sex parties. We discuss body image, consent issues and the gray areas that can arise in sexual encounters when consent isn't properly sought out, nonmonogamy and polyamory, what can go very right (and very, very wrong) at a fully naked comedy show, and lots, lots more. It's a fun convo and I hope you dig it, pinecones.
For all things Billy Procida, go to manwhorepod.com.
xoxo,Samia

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

This week, I bring you another snippet of my origin story, with the sordid tale of the first time I confronted my own feelings of rage-y, crazy jealousy in my very first healthy, functional nonmonogamous relationship. The number one question people curious about nonmonogamy ask me is, "How do you deal with your jealousy?" This story answers that question and also gives you some insight into how to navigate jealousy in your own relationships, whether or not they are monogamous. Enjoy, pinecones! And as always, let me know your thoughts, send me your requests for advice, and send over your own anonymous confessions to closetedpodcast@gmail.com. I LOVE hearing from you.

Watch the video version of this bonus episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/FatznKzHClE

Follow the show on Instagram @closetedwithsamia, and follow me on Instagram and TikTok @samia.mounts.

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Okay, pinecones, I am getting real personal with you in this bonus interview! Adam Darrow is a man of many extreme talents - house-building, extreme sports including free solo rock-climbing, tankless scuba diving, and BASE jumping, and you know, running tech companies, whatevs, no big deal - and he recently published a memoir about his foray into extreme non-monogamy with a woman named Jane, who told him up front that she has LOTS of casual sex and never plans to change that for any relationship. The book is called Seek the Risk, and in it, Darrow provides the most clear-eyed perspective I've ever encountered on the struggles that men face in nonmonogamous relationships with sexually voracious women...women like, oh y'know, ME. We have a fascinating conversation in which I reveal some intimate details from my own life, and Adam dispenses wisdom that is invaluable to anyone who's curious about the pleasures and pitfalls of nonmonogamy.

Learn more about Adam and buy the book: www.seektherisk.net

If you are a Spotify subscriber, the audiobook of Seek the Risk is free with your subscription!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Get 30 days of BetterSleep FREE with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

I am tha-rilled to bring you my looooong, super-chatty, unfiltered conversation with Mattie Jo Cowsert, an actor and author based in New York City. Mattie Jo wrote a memoir called God, Sex, and Rich People, in which she documents her deconstruction from evangelical Christianity and purity culture to become the most wholesome sex-positive activist you've ever encountered. Her pitch of a TV show version of her book won the Audience Choice Award at the Yale Innovation Summit (!!!) and she's now developing it into a one-woman theater piece as an artist in residence at Collective Connecticut. This woman is a powerhouse! And damn funny to boot!

In this episode, we discuss:

1. Mattie Jo's origin story as a born theater kid with a pastor dad in a heavily evangelical community.
2. How her sex education consisted mostly of scare tactics but her parents were a little looser about it than the community around them.
3. How making gay friends at theater camp made her question the existence of Hell.
4. Her move to New York City, and why having Jewish and Muslim friends blew open her worldview and made her leave evangelicalism for good.
5. Her "Rubble Years" and the bad experiences she had when she finally made her sexual debut without any idea of how to handle things.
6. How she eventually developed her own sexual ethic and value system around sex and relationships and wrote an amazing dang book about all this! I just love her.

Buy God, Sex, and Rich People and learn more about Mattie Jo here: www.mattiejocowsert.com

Subscribe to Mattie Jo's Substack: https://mattiejocowsert.substack.com/

Follow MJ on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mattiejocowsert/

Follow MJ on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mattiejocowsquirt

That's it for this week! Love ya, pinecones!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get 30 days of BetterSleep FREE with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Get into this sassy, sexy, totally unfiltered conversation about sex toys and personal sex stories that I had with the fine and fabulous April & Amy of the Shameless Sex podcast! PINECONES!!! These ladies give LIFE. We had so much fun chatting it up that we ended up recording for double the length of time we meant to, soooo this baby is a two-parter. I'll be releasing part 2 next week! Enjoyyyyy and find all things April & Amy below.

Shameless Sex on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ShamelessSexPodcast/featured

Shameless Sex on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/shameless-sex/id1242394336

Shameless Sex on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ZdhZeupiXtBZxCeI7jkEk?si=f029bbc2dd5d4381

Buy Shameless Sex the book: https://purepleasureshop.com/products/shameless-sex-1

Follow Amy & April on socials:

https://www.instagram.com/shamelesssexpodcast/

https://www.tiktok.com/@shamelesssexpodcast?_t=8eoekGR2KqZ&_r=1

https://www.facebook.com/shamelesssexpodcast

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/

Follow ClosetEd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closetedwithsamia/

Stay tuned for the second half of this feisty, flirty convo next week!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Darla is a happily married freelancer who provides for her aging parents and spreads joy and sunshine everywhere she goes. She also turns to sex work when finances are tight…and she and her husband, Leo, just don’t talk about it.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Connor and Willow are a happily married military couple who had always been monogamous…until an older military couple introduced them to swinging and changed their lives forever.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Ray is a straight, classically masculine Black man working in the entertainment industry…who since his teenage years has been secretly sleeping with trans women while only dating cisgender women publicly.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Youngho looks like a very normal Korean man with a very normal wife and a very normal life. Except he and his wife Jiyoung have regular adult play dates with their close circle of friends, and no one else in their life has a clue.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Andrea is a successful entrepreneur working in corporate America with happy kids and a handsome husband who made it clear from the get that he never wanted to be monogamous…which led to her discovering that she’s not straight, and this could actually work for her.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

CJ is a Korean American adoptee and actor who lets people assume he’s gay or straight depending on the context they meet him in…but in reality, he’s a bisexual, BDSM-loving undercover freak. And barely anyone knows.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Troy is a Black man with a big extended family working a blue-collar job in the American Midwest. He lets people assume his sexuality, but he never talks about it, never dates or has sex, and hasn’t for years…since a terrifying diagnosis turned his life upside down.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Get into PART 2 of this sassy, sexy, totally unfiltered conversation about sex toys and personal sex stories that I had with the fine and fabulous April & Amy of the Shameless Sex podcast! PINECONES!!! These ladies give LIFE. We had so much fun chatting it up that we ended up recording for double the length of time we meant to and I am not sorry. Enjoyyyyy and find all things April & Amy below.

Shameless Sex on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ShamelessSexPodcast/featured

Shameless Sex on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/shameless-sex/id1242394336

Shameless Sex on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ZdhZeupiXtBZxCeI7jkEk?si=f029bbc2dd5d4381

Buy Shameless Sex the book: https://purepleasureshop.com/products/shameless-sex-1

Follow Amy & April on socials:

https://www.instagram.com/shamelesssexpodcast/

https://www.tiktok.com/@shamelesssexpodcast?_t=8eoekGR2KqZ&_r=1

https://www.facebook.com/shamelesssexpodcast

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/

Follow ClosetEd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closetedwithsamia/

SUPPORT ME FINANCIALLY, my sweet pinecones! I need your helpppp to keep making this show!

Subscribe to my Substack and make a pledge for a monthly or annual subscription: http://samiamounts.substack.com/

Venmo me: https://account.venmo.com/u/samia-mounts

CashApp me: https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

I love you all so much!

xoxo,

Samia

Thank you to all the listeners who sent in questions for my advice series! Here is the very first one I've chosen to feature on this series, mostly because it's a really common question I've heard from folks who are questioning whether some form of nonmonogamy might be right for them. Listener Preston* asked:

My wife and I are in an interesting part in our relationship that we both consider monogamous. After being intimate with just each other for 13 years, we have started talking more openly about our desires. We fell into a "normal" rhythm when it came to our sex life. Opening up about other desires, seemed dangerous, and specifically on my end, felt like they coild shatter the relationship. However, after having honest conversations, I found that she had surprisingly been open to just about all ideas. One we talked about was inviting another person in to bed for us to enjoy mutually.

What is your take on the healthiness of this and the sustainability of it for a relationship such as ours?

How would you go about setting healthy ground rules that makes us all feel comfortable including the potential third person?

How do you open conversations with people about this?

* Name has been changed.

Thank you, Preston for this wonderful question! I did my best to answer it, and I want to open this up to my amazing audience of listeners. If you have a response to Preston that I didn't cover in this bonus episode, please oh please send it to me as a comment on social media, a DM, or in an email to closetedpodcast@gmail.com, and I'll include it in an upcoming bonus episode!

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/

Follow ClosetEd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closetedwithsamia/

If you are getting something valuable out of this show, please consider SUPPORTING ME FINANCIALLY, my sweet pinecones! I need your helpppp to keep making this thing!

Subscribe to my Substack and pledge a monthly or annual subscription: http://samiamounts.substack.com/

Venmo me: https://account.venmo.com/u/samia-mounts

CashApp me: https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

That's all for now! See ya next week, pinecones.

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

In this episode, I ask myself why, oh whyyy, am I so weird with women? I love them, I've known I'm attracted to them both sexually and romantically since I was a kid, and yet I've only managed to have one relationship with a woman that only lasted six weeks in college and otherwise have been a massive failure in the lady-dating department.

And I'm not alone. I've heard lots of bisexual girlies talking about how they don't even feel like they can claim the bisexual label because they almost exclusively date and sleep with men. Most of the bi women I know feel they aren't "bi enough."

In this episode:

• I’ve wanted women my whole life—and stayed silent
• One intense, six-week relationship that blew me open…and shut me down
• Why men feel “easier” (and what that says about me)
• The part I hate admitting: I’m the one getting in my own way
• Is this a me problem…or a bi girl problem?
• And the twist I did NOT see coming

Read the original essay on my Substack: https://samiamounts.substack.com/p/why-am-i-so-weird-with-women

Screen For Years to Come: https://james-patrick-nelson.com/for-years-to-come

SUPPORT THE SHOW, CUTIE PATOOT!

Become a paying Substack subscriber: https://samiamounts.substack.com

Venmo Samia: @Samia-Mounts / https://account.venmo.com/u/Samia-Mounts

CashApp Samia: $SamiaMounts / https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

Thank you, pinecones! See ya next week.

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Fox is a happily married parent with a normal work and home life...and a spicy social life with his kinky friends. Ooh la la!

In this audio-only episode with Happy Slut's very first anonymous guest, we get into what happens when a self-described “regular Joe” follows his curiosity into the world of kink play and wildly honest connection—and finds out it sets him free.

We talk about:

• The super-slow, podcast-fueled awakening that led him into kink
• How rope nights and kink clubs can foster community
• The surprisingly complex question: what even counts as sex?
• How he navigated opening things up with his wife (without blowing up his marriage)
• Why “you don’t have to have sex” was the gateway that made everything possible
• The ethics of play: communication, consent, and not being an absolute menace
• Having multiple play partners…and realizing you can actually do something about your crushes
• The joy of helping people live out fantasies they never thought they’d get to experience
• Why exploration, curiosity, and emotional safety matter way more than labels

This one is funny, thoughtful, unexpectedly wholesome, and just the right amount of chaotic.

Basically: what if you could look like a regular person on the outside…and still be out here living your weird little dream life?

Oh wait...that's you? Yeah, baby pinecone, that's ALL of us.

Mentioned in this episode:

Pink Kink Podcast: https://pinkkinkpodcast.com/

The Kink Consultant Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-kink-consultant/id1766435920

SUPPORT THE SHOW!

Subscribe to Samia's Substack: https://samiamounts.substack.com

Venmo Samia: @Samia-Mounts / https://account.venmo.com/u/Samia-Mounts

CashApp Samia: $SamiaMounts / https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

I love you with the power of a thousand magic wands!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Callie Little is a polyamorous, pansexual witch who illustrated and co-authored my favorite tarot deck, Every Little Thing You Do is Magic, and its incredible companion book, which offers readers the opportunity to deepen their relationship with the cards and their own intuition. I reached out to them to replace two cards my dog had chewed up and they responded saying they checked out the pod and wanted to come on if I'd have them. IF I'D HAVE THEM?! I melted and exploded and said absolutely yes, thank you, Universe, and the results were glorious.

• going from “I’ll try anything once” to… wait, I actually have standards now??
• why you don’t have to earn your desires or make them make sense to anyone else
• the difference between real connection and just doing what you think you’re supposed to do
• the subtle ways patriarchy trains you to give up your autonomy and call it love
• that moment when something clicks and you’re like… oh, this isn’t a choice, this is a cage
• how to stay open without ignoring every red flag in front of your face
• a definition of cheating that might rearrange your brain a little
• what it actually looks like to be yourself first, even in a long-term relationship
• how to stop spiraling in shame and start getting curious instead
• why you keep wanting people who aren’t that great for you (and what that’s really about)
• building relationships based on choice instead of fear, obligation, or habit
• a recurring theme: you’re allowed to want what you want. yes, even that.

• tarot as a tool for figuring your shit out (more useful than you think)
• book recs that will absolutely mess with your understanding of love in a good way

It's SO GOOD, pinecones!

FOLLOW CALLIE:

Callie's Instagram: @goshcallie

Callie's Substack: The Village Witch

Callie's podcast: The Pocket Coven (apologies for calling it the Pocket Oracle in the episode!)

Purchase the Every Little Thing You Do is Magic Tarot Deck and Companion Book

Book Callie for tattoo work

All things Callie: www.callielittle.com

Book & Substack recommendations in this episode:

The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

Matriarchal Blessing on Substack by Celeste Davis

Spells for Transmuting Limerence Into Liberation by Yumi Sakugawa

Love in a F*cked Up World by Dean Spade

Polysecure by Jessica Fern

Polywise by Jessica Fern

Open Deeply by Kate Loree

Adult Braces by Lindy West

SUPPORT THE SHOW!

Subscribe to Samia's Substack

Venmo: @Samia-Mounts

CashApp: $SamiaMounts

Love ya, pinecones!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Her Confidant is Australia's only female-led male escort agency, serving all of Australia and now expanding to the United States. Owner Anna Grosman and anonymous escort Hudson chat with me about how therapeutic their clients find their services and how fulfilling it is to be a part of someone's most pleasurable moments.

We cover:

• A 43-year-old virgin makes her sexual debut with Hudson in a hotel suite...and afterward, begins dating for the first time in her life.
• A couple rediscover their spark...by inviting Hudson and his girlfriend Sage to spend an evening with them getting naked under the stars.
• Hudson's tragic back story, and how he used it as a catalyst for his own authenticity and growth.
• Anna's deeply hot back story, and how she realized not everyone was getting down with their spouses the way she was, and the women of hte world needed help!
• What a difference it makes when a man is able to be fully present with a woman, to really listen to her and attune to her emotions. It is, literally, what will get you laid. Andrew Tate's got it ALL WRONG.

This is a really fun convo, pinecones! I hope you dig it! Send me an email at happyslutcast@gmail.com if you have comments, questions, or concerns. I love to hear from you.

Visit herconfidant.com.au for more on Her Confidant.

See Hudson's profile on Her Confidant. It's SO good. *fans herself*

Follow Samia on Instagram @samia.mounts

Follow Happy Slut on Instagram and Tiktok @happyslutcast

Email your comments, questions, dreams and wishes to happyslutcast@gmail.com

SUPPORT THE SHOW WITH YOUR CUTE LITTLE SLUTTY DOLLARS!

Venmo: @Samia-Mounts

CashApp: $SamiaMounts

Mentioned in this episode:

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Dixie De La Tour has been facilitating joyful sexual experiences for most of her life, and you'll be shocked at the early life experiences that made her who she is today. She's the creator and host of the exuberant, wacky live show, Bawdy Storytelling, which features stories about sex, kink, gender, and body image and just celebrated its 20-year anniversary! She's also a self-proclaimed wild slut...but even sluts have dry spells, and in this episode, you'll hear all about how Dixie came back from eight years of no sex and is now ready to fuck like her life depends on it.

NOTE: This episode contains frank discussions of sex and mentions of sexual assault. Listen with care.

For all things Dixie De La Tour, head to www.bawdystorytelling.com.

BUY TICKETS to Bawdy Storytelling live in San Francisco on May 15: https://events.humanitix.com/bawdy-storytelling-s-the-big-comeback

Follow Dixie on Instagram @bawdystorytelling

Following Samia on Instagram @samia.mounts

Follow Happy Slut on Instagram and Tiktok @happyslutcast

Email your comments, questions, dreams and wishes to happyslutcast@gmail.com

SUPPORT THE SHOW WITH YOUR CUTE LITTLE SLUTTY DOLLARS!

Venmo: @Samia-Mounts

CashApp: $SamiaMounts

I love you, pinecones! More next week!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Listen for a major announcement about the future of ClosetEd! Gahhhh I'm excited about this one, pinecones.

Watch all video episodes on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@closeted-with-samia

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

This week, I take a listener advice question from Ben (not his real name), who asked if he's a "sick freak" because he felt arousal instead of jealousy when he caught his ex-wife cheating with his best friend. Oh Ben! My heart! I hope my answer helps you, you sweet, sweet man.

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/

Follow ClosetEd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closetedwithsamia/

SUPPORT ME FINANCIALLY, my sweet pinecones! I need your helpppp to keep making this show!

Subscribe to my Substack and make a pledge for a monthly or annual subscription: http://samiamounts.substack.com/

Venmo me: https://account.venmo.com/u/samia-mounts

CashApp me: https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

See ya next week, pinecones!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

I am extra excited about this week's interview, mostly because it was the result of me literally fangirl-ing my way into Charlotte Shane's DMs after reading her incredible memoir, An Honest Woman: A Memoir of Love and Sex Work. Her book tells the story of her years working as a high-end escort in nuanced and poetic detail, and in this interview, we chat about what gave her the courage to pursue sex work at age 20, why she loved it so much she kept doing it well into her 30s, and her unique insights on humanity, sex, relationships, and what is actually "normal" for human beings. I'm SO proud of this interview. Enjoyyy, and get Charlotte's book! Links below.

BUY An Honest Woman: https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/An-Honest-Woman/Charlotte-Shane/9781982126865

Check out Charlotte's website: https://www.charlotteshane.com

Follow Charlotte on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/charoshane

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/

Follow ClosetEd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closetedwithsamia/

SUPPORT ME FINANCIALLY, my sweet pinecones! I need your helpppp to keep making this show!

Subscribe to my Substack and make a pledge for a monthly or annual subscription: http://samiamounts.substack.com/

Venmo me: https://account.venmo.com/u/samia-mounts

CashApp me: https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

See ya next week, sexy things!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.

Get 30 days of BetterSleep FREE with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!

Use code CLOSETED at check-out.

Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted

This week, I bring you my very explicit conversation with the most sex-positive doctor you'll ever meet, Dr. Elliot Justin, founder of FirmTech. FirmTech is a sex tech company, and they make a cock ring, called the TechRing, that give you valuable data on your sexual and cardiovascular health! Whaaaaaat. So cool.

Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products using discount code CLOSETED at check-out! Head over to www.myfirmtech.com to shop now.

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/

Follow ClosetEd on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/closetedwithsamia/

SUPPORT ME FINANCIALLY, my sweet pinecones! I need your helpppp to keep making this show!

Subscribe to my Substack and make a pledge for a monthly or annual subscription: http://samiamounts.substack.com/

Venmo me: https://account.venmo.com/u/samia-mounts

CashApp me: https://cash.app/$SamiaMounts

See ya next week, sexy things!

xoxo,

Samia

Mentioned in this episode:

Beyond Satisfied Pro Video Course

Get 15% off the Beyond Satified Pro video course from Kenneth Play and take your sex life to a whole new level: www.kennethplay.com/closeted

BetterSleep FREE Trial

Get 30 days of BetterSleep for free with link www.bettersleep.com/closeted.