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https://damagedbutdelivered.com

#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting #raisingmen #raisingkids #mantalk 

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting #raisingmen #raisingkids #mantalk 

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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Welcome to another heartfelt episode of The Dear Son, Show where hosts D Johns and Jey Blac engage in meaningful conversations about life through the lens of fatherhood. In this episode, they navigate the exciting and challenging journey of parenting, focusing on significant moments and lessons learned. They discuss their sons transitioning into adulthood, the importance of expressing love and appreciation, and how to prepare them for life's responsibilities. Tune in for a heartwarming and enlightening discussion on embracing fatherhood. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe for more insightful content!

00:00 Introduction to the Dear Son Show

00:19 Hosts Catching Up

00:48 Parenting Updates and Reflections

04:21 Discussing the Joys of Fatherhood

05:47 Children's Humor and Personalities

09:59 Activities and Hobbies

15:52 Lessons Learned from Parenting

21:19 Changing the Tire

21:26 Teaching Life Skills to Kids

22:04 Yard Work Memories

23:18 Bonding with Children

24:41 Caring for Aging Parents

25:10 The Cycle of Life

33:38 Expressing Love to Teenage Sons

36:16 Emotional Intelligence in Parenting

41:43 Pride and Support in Parenting

47:10 Cherishing Parenting Moments

48:31 Conclusion and Gratitude

#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting  

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This is the episode that I have been waiting for. I finally sat down with my father and my sons to discuss the history of fatherhood in my family. “What I wish my father told me” is not an indictment on my father, or on me for that matter. The fatherhood journey is nuanced and more dynamic than static at any stage. For every meaningful lesson that I learned late, I want my sons to learn earlier (from my experience when possible).

We talked through the positive and negative tendencies that have been consistent in my family for generations. While some ideologies continued out of tradition, we found others to be very intentionally passed down for good reason. Everyone had a voice. For context, my youngest son was seven at the time of this recording, and, my father, 74…everyone had a voice. I spent parts of the conversation intrigued, proud, envious, and ultimately grateful. We need more of this. 

My father counseled us on the value of painful experiences. Sometimes these are necessary to develop a man’s character, his sense of worth, and his moral compass. I understand the principle very well, yet I struggle with allowing my sons (or any of my children) to experience hurt when I can prevent it. This is a disservice to them in some regards…I’m working on it.

There’s so much more to say, and that’s what the episode provides. Listen all the way through to get the greatest value. Have you had a conversation like this with your family? If not, what is the roadblock preventing it? As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #grandfather #son

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Dear Son, the streets don’t love you. This message may not be an awakening for you, but so many young men learn this lesson through jail or death (of others). Though the story typically includes at least one of those outcomes, the backstories of these young men are nuanced. For many, their parents (or caregivers) were not aware of their street activity. In other cases, the parents (or caregivers) turned a blind eye because they enjoyed the financial benefit of the street life. 

In this episode, Martez Gurley-El gives us a look into his journey to and through the streets and provides a perspective on what that life cost him personally, financially, and professionally. He is a thriving positively contributing member of his community, a loving husband, and father of four young men. We discussed the parallels of street life and business, and how he has parlayed the objective success principles into a thriving business. 

Marty, as he is most affectionately known, has a passion for people. You can find him sharing his wisdom and experiences with anyone who will listen or working in partnership with multiple non-profit organizations such as People Helping People and The Friendship Lottery. Even when his time and energy are for profit, he approaches business with a strong desire to help his clients identify the best solution and form lasting business partnerships whenever possible. 

You won’t regret the time you invest into this episode. Listen to the full conversation to get the maximum benefit. As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence 

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Parenting is a team sport, even when it isn’t. There’s an infinite number of circumstances that determine why or how a child lands in a single-parent home. While single parenthood is not an indictment on the child’s future, it can present challenges that weigh heavily on the primary custodial parent. How do single mothers navigate that process without losing it? The work is nuanced for every situation, yet the show must go on. 

In this episode, Gelina and Jondrea, hosts of the Queens of Kings Podcast, share their journey to and through single parenthood. Both are raising young black kings. They provide a transparent view of the challenges and heartbreak they experienced in prior relationships, which also yielded their greatest blessings, their sons. We walked through the range of emotions each of them experienced during their healing journeys, and how those lessons inform and empower them today.

We also discussed the importance a positive male influence, be it the biological father or a #FatherFigure, they know their boys need to see certain behaviors and characteristics that a mother just cannot model. How else does a boy learn how to become a man? There are many narratives and agendas that attempt to devalue the importance of two-parent homes or positive co-parenting relationships that are endangering current and future generations. In some instances, boys are unfairly levied with grown man expectations in the absence of a responsible man in the house.

Let’s be clear, Gelina and Jondrea are great mothers. This episode broadened my perspective on how my actions as a father impact how my daughters see and understand men. What has been your parenthood experience? If you could choose one lesson to learn without the pain you experienced while learning it, what would that be?

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #parenthood #singlemom #blackfathers #fatherandson #divorce #lifeafterdivorce #blackexcellence #breakups

Follow Gelina: 

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Fatherhood is a learned behavior. Many of us mimic the behaviors that we saw or experienced growing up...sometimes to a fault. Children are like algorithms that are constantly being updated by some supernatural software.  What worked on us as children isn't guaranteed to work on our children, and, inevitably, there will be a need to reprogram the way we parent. 

In addition to the child evolving, the parent is also evolving. That evolution may have positive and negative phases, which might be processed differently by the child and the parent. These nuances make parenting difficult to navigate, and sometimes we must abandon the default parenting behaviors and reprogram the way we operate.

This episode explores the journey of four fathers from varying backgrounds and highlights several vulnerable moments that changed the way they dad. 

Shawn Serfass is struggled with drug addiction at a young age, which ultimately landed him in prison. He spent the time behind bars working on himself to become a better man and father to the son he left behind. His experiences have fueled his purpose, and today he is a reputable member of society, advocate for at-risk youth, loving husband, and a great father. He's also a successful owner of the "2nd Chance Fitness" brand with two fitness facilities located in Texas (Mansfield and Midlothian).

Follow Shawn: 

https://instagram.com/Shawn2ndChance

Reggie George, the owner of the "Father Figure" brand, shares a riveting testimony of faith. His family experienced unimaginable trauma when his teenage twin daughter was stabbed in the head at school by another male student. The details are too dark to share here...just know that God restores. Through this journey of faith, Reggie identified his purpose of building an international community of father figures to ensure every child has a positive male influence to help them navigate life. This is an ambitious mission; indeed, however, the Father Figure brand is growing at warp speed. All of which, he credits to the Father above.

Follow Reggie: 

https://instagram.com/FatherFigureApparel

James Johnson (co-host) provides a very transparent view of his experience as a father during his first marriage and what he experiences today in his current family dynamic. Divorce hurts all parties involved in some manner. His relationship with the children from the first marriage are strained, and you can see the pain in his demeanor as he talks about it. The lessons learned facilitated his growth as a man, but it is bittersweet at best. "Pay attention," he says. The message is to be mindful of your behavior and how it impacts those around you, especially the children. Don't learn the lesson at the expense of your relationship. 

Follow Shawn: 

https://instagram.com/JeyBlac

Me...well, I get pretty vulnerable as well (per usual). Enough about that though, this is a very meaningful discussion, and I pray that it blesses you. As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #survivor #overcomeaddiction #fatherfigure 

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Finding profit in your purpose is a life hack, but many of us think that these are conflicting principles. For those that are courageous enough to jump into the deep end of the purpose pool with both feet, that leap of faith is also paired with financial frustrations as the money may not flow steadily if at all. Now the reward isn't due simply because the individual went 'all-in,' but there is a reasonable path to finding fulfillment...and funding. 

Entrepreneurship is a roller-coaster kind of journey. To be successful you must grow individually, make tough decisions and sacrifices, and (where applicable) keep your personal relationships together. Sometimes the challenge is that the people around you aren't growing, stretching, and changing at the rate that you are. This is especially critical in marriages; more so if entrepreneurship wasn't in the cards when you got married. 

Phillip provides some very practical perspectives about his journey to become a successful small business owner. We also discussed the importance of podcasting to the future of business. The industry is still relatively new, and opportunities abound. As a father transitioning into full-time entrepreneurship, this was an important conversation for me. I want my sons to know that you can be a responsible provider while doing something that you love.

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

#fatherhood #entrepreneurship  #smallbusinessowner #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence

Follow Phillip: 

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Checkout his podcasting course:

http://phillipwashingtonjr.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Many of us take our senses for granted until one of them is compromised. Furthermore, once compromised, how would you respond? Personally, I cannot imagine living life without physical sight (or any sense for that matter), especially as a father with young children. This conversation gives us a bit of perspective on what life is like for the father and the child.

 

Poetré is a rare breed. He’s an artist’s artist. His soul is seasoned, and it shines vividly through his music. This conversation reveals his joyful outlook on life, which can be credited to the example set by his hero, his father. He paints the picture of a loving father, who was always hustling to ensure his family never lacked. A musician as well, his father is a chip off the Stevie Wonder block. His mastery of the keys is the primary qualification for that comparison; however, losing his sight made the parallel more convincing. 

 

Poetré is a gifted writer with roots founded in the spoken word genre. He admired his father from the toddler stage and could be found somewhere nearby playing the drums as his father played the keys. His music has soul…meaning…life! Some songs are heavier than others, but they all seem to just feel good. There just might be a snippet from his next single somewhere in the episode.  There’s so much more to say, but that’s what the episode is for. Grab a snack. This is a good one!

 

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

 

#fatherhood #Gastroparesis #diabetes #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence 

 

Follow Poetré: https://instagram.com/iam_poetre

Consider supporting the By Faith Not Sight non-profit organization: https://byfaithnotsight.org

 

“We aim to support, bring hope, and encourage families and individuals who experience various types of illnesses such as Gastroparesis, Diabetes, and other stress related illnesses.” (Excerpt from website)

 

 

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This episode is the epitome of the platform's mission. In order to bridge the generational gaps, we need to understand perspectives of those that blazed the trail before us. How was fatherhood shaped in the early 1900s? Did the dads of old face similar challenges that are prevalent today?

 

In this episode, Kevin Stalling shares a rich family history of entrepreneurship, business ownership, world-traveling, and, unfortunately, loss. He credits his father for molding him into the successful father and business-owner that he is today, and his big sister for teaching him the ways of the world. 

 

Kevin's fatherhood journey wasn't without hardships. He shared how the initial news that he would be a father was "the worst thing" at the time. Let's be clear, he wasn't on a path to be a deadbeat dad. He just wasn't prepared. That phase didn't last long, and Kevin adapted to his greatest calling in life, fatherhood. I don't consider his story to be the typical experience, but there were many themes that resonated with me.

 

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

 

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence 

 

 

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Sometimes men don't know what they're lacking in life until fatherhood sets in. Ideally, there would be a deep catalog of positive experiences and references to pull from...a how-to manual of sorts. That's extremely aspirational even in the best scenarios. Where do men learn to be men? How does each man learn best? The truth is, a man will learn by what is modeled throughout his life. Good or bad, some version of manhood is being taught everyday.

This conversation with Brandon was therapeutic for me. Our backgrounds are different, but the challenges of fatherhood resonated with me as I'm sure it will with other men. His story is colorful, eventful, and traumatic. He recalls all of it with a smile on his face, masking the hurtful moments that have shaped who is today. Through it all, he has chosen to be better than what was was modeled throughout his life, and strive to give his family gets a better version of him everyday. This is a good one.

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What are we really teaching our sons? Most dads have an immediate response listing all the topics that are most important or memorable to them, but what are the children learning from their actions? They know the difference between their parents’ talk and their walk. We had a deep discussion about teaching them to be tough, choosing friends, music and other cultural influences. 

My conversation counterpart, James Johnson, brought the energy again. I mean, he’s a DSN community fave, and more of a recurring co-host at this point. His perspective on the impact of the circles our sons choose is poignant and quite timely. We covered a lot, yet there’s so much left to unpack 

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

 

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence 

 

Flexxion Chiropractic

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Accountability is the true measure of a man. Oftentimes we search for excuses as to why a man behaves a certain way. Perhaps his father wasn't around; or maybe, his father set a terrible example. I personally believe that there are more great examples of fatherhood than there are of terrible fathers, but that's a conversation for another episode. I am certain that there are men out here defying the odds, working through, and healing from trauma, and generally being the change that they want to see. 

 

This conversation with Forrest Brooks is proof. We discussed somewhat taboo topics like church hurt, abandonment, and what happens when a father starts a new family with someone else. How do you extract the positives from those experiences and live a healthy healed adult life? Jump into this episode to get our perspectives. I'm not suggesting that you will agree, but I'm certain this episode will initiate a conversation in your mind, family, and maybe even your community. Be blessed.

 

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

 

#fatherhood #daddyissues #accountable #blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence 

 

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Welcome to another impactful episode of The Dear Son, Show with Jey Blac and D Johns! In this episode, we dive deep into real-life conversations aimed to guide young men and fathers through the challenges of life. JD shares a moving story about his father's recent health scare, and they both open up about navigating their sons' journeys toward adulthood and independence. Together, they tackle the importance of 'fine-tuning' rather than 'removing' traits in your children, the valuable life lessons learned, and the importance of setting benchmarks for parental involvement. Tune in to hear our take on vital topics like effective parenting, preparing for life's unexpected turns, and encouraging self-awareness in your kids. Don't forget to hit that subscribe button and share your thoughts in the comments below!

00:00 Introduction and Host Greetings

00:17 Personal Stories and Family Health

01:29 Parenting Challenges and Reflections

02:06 Today's Topic: Don't Remove, Fine Tune

02:30 Parenting Styles and Generational Differences

04:21 Navigating Teenage Independence

06:00 Preparing for the Future: Education and Career Choices

10:35 Balancing Guidance and Independence

13:14 Real-Life Parenting Struggles

24:31 Getting the Bread: Job Hunting and Opportunities

25:40 Scooter Dilemma: To Ride or Not to Ride

27:45 Lessons in Confidence and Humility

29:45 Navigating Trade School: Challenges and Strategies

33:21 Parental Guidance: Balancing Support and Independence

46:43 Final Thoughts and Reflections

#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting 

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Dear Son, they're shooting at me! In this episode I caught up with my teenage son to get his perspective on school safety and the dangers of being tough (or at least trying to be). I shared a story about one of my run-ins with gun violence. Some days I'm paralyzed by the thought that my son might, at some point, have a similar experience. 

 

Violence is so prevalent, that it can become numbing to kids, teenagers...and adults. Part of the struggle is navigating what is too much exposure, too soon. Part of me enjoys subscribing to the myth that ignorance is bliss. The rest of me wants to ensure my children know how to fight. The dichotomy. 

 

As always, I welcome your feedback and perspective. It takes a village.

 

#blackfathers #fatherandson #blackexcellence #entrepreneurship #toughguy

 

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Mr. JB the Barber is a multi-faceted young entrepreneur with an old soul. He owns a successful barber shop filled with expressive art and hair artists that have become a staple in the community. Growing up, he was inspired by his father, also a barber, to take business ownership seriously, and he has become a savvy people leader in the process. 

We talked about his early days growing up in Pine Bluff, AR where he recalls life in the hood being fun as a child, but he later understood the dangers of that environment. His family ultimately settled in the DFW metroplex by way of Bellevue, NE. DFW is where he formed the friendships and relationships that have significantly shaped his life. He gives us a peak into his relationship with the mother of his child and a with a friend that was murdered over a very trivial matter.

Fatherhood has been one of his most rewarding roles in life. His daughter is a brilliant and beautiful artist in the making. Though they are no longer a couple romantically, he speaks highly of his daughter's mother, and they work harmoniously to raise babygirl. The loss of his friend; however, clearly impacted him during the conversation. Their friendship created a brotherhood, and a collective of artists formed around that, Top Off Entertainment. He stepped away from the music business after losing his brother but has found the inspiration to rap again lately. His barbershop is named Top Off Cuts to honor the legacy. 

Success looks different for many people. Most of us have a tendency to judge someone's character by what we immediately see. That's just human nature to a large degree. However, for those of us that mature beyond that, we're able to find the beauty in the journey and celebrate individuals for who they are. This conversation broadened my perspectives on a younger generation and gives me hope that they'll be just fine. 

#fatherhood #blackfathers #blackartist #blackexcellence #entrepreneurship #dfwbarbers #barber #dallastx 

Be sure to follow JB: https://instagram.com/mrjbthabarber

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https://linktr.ee/djohnslive

Do you know the vibes that resonate throughout your family? As fathers we are responsible for demonstrating manhood (amongst other important characteristics) in the home, which requires us to be mindful of our internal frequency. Don’t get tripped up on the wording, I’m just keeping it on par with this episode. Essentially, there is a tone that we set whether intentionally or unintentionally. It’s like the age-old parent-to-child [threatening] question: “Do you have an attitude?” Of course! Everyone always has an attitude. Typically, the inference is that the child is demonstrating some negative behavior at the time, and the parent wants them to “act better.”

In this conversation with Phillip, he challenged my thought pattern to consider how my actions resonate within my household, and whether I’m really in tune with how everyone in my household is feeling. Phillip has always been aware of his inner-spirit and is very open about being sensitive to that voice throughout his life. Society often pairs sensitivity with weakness, which is often a gross misrepresentation of the individual’s emotional state. Embracing this gift propelled Phillip to increasing levels of personal, financial, business, and familial success throughout his life.

Deep into the conversation, we began processing our thoughts on religion, God, and what this current life means. There are several points that require way more conversation to understand the full perspectives; however, I am always encouraged when men can intelligently discuss differences without judgement, anger, or any other unproductive result. We’ll continue the dialogue on a future episode. In the meantime, I challenge you to process your internal responses and why you believe what you believe. The end goal is not to change your mind, but you should be certain about your beliefs, and unbothered by those that believe otherwise. Be blessed.

#fatherhood #blackfathers  #thoughtleader  #blackexcellence   #fatherandson #spiritual 

Learn more about Phillip's business:  https://stonehillwealthmanagement.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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There's trauma on the yard! Many of us (parents) considered the school to be one of the safest places to send our children at one time. Over the past decade or so, the senseless attacks on our babies may have caused a heightened sense of awareness for some, paranoia for others, and perhaps even panic for a few. How would your life change if your child was the victim of a violent act at school? That's an unfair question to those who've never experienced it, and I pray that it is a question you'll never be able to answer from experience. 

Unfortunately for the George family, they will have to live with such an experience forever. Reggie George is a loving husband, father, and father figure. One routine morning he dropped his twin daughters off at a Mansfield ISD (TX) public school not knowing that his life, his twin daughters’ lives, and his wife's life would pivot within hours due to a cowardly, horrific event at the school. 

The scenario is too graphic to type here, but one of the twins was a approached and stabbed...which landed her in an 8.5 hour brain surgery fighting for her life. This episode connects the dots from that eventful day to the Father Figure movement that was birthed through Reggie's healing process, much of which he credits to an evolved relationship with God. 

This testimony will rock your spirit, but, more importantly, will bless you. 

#fatherfigure #fatherhood #blackfathers #blackexcellence  #fatherandson #schoolviolence #girldad #childhoodtrauma 

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Which comes first, black, or blue? Is there even a line between the two for police officers of color? Lieutenant Yowman gives us a peek into the everyday life and psychology of an officer, and how his journey to the force evolved. It all started in Port Arthur, TX, where Adrian grew up with his younger sister and single father in the home. He credits his father's drill sergeant background for the strict tone of the house. Adrian understood responsibility and leadership early as he was charged with overseeing his sister, ensuring that she handled her household chores and was safe and protected outside of the house. 

At a young age, Adrian spent time riding along with his uncle, also a police officer, and knew immediately that he wanted to follow in his footsteps. Even after his uncle's untimely death while on the job, Adrian's desire to join the force never wavered. At the time of this recording, Adrian is thirteen years in, and provides a real-world perspective of what his priorities are as a black husband, father, and cop. We talked about the challenges with inadequate training and expectations of the average police officer. Does more need to be done to qualify and place officers? Are there still traces of racism and discrimination in the police system? Watch the full episode to gain a broader perspective, and then sound off in the comments, respectfully. 

#blackandblue #blackfathers ##blackexcellence #stepdad #stepfather #stepmom #blendedfamily #fatherandson #dadhacks #emotionalintelligence

Follow Adrion: https://facebook.com/adrian.jamar.75

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You've just entered the no step zone. For some, there isn't much thought given to the term step as applied to familial relationships. Stepmom, stepsister, stepbrother...stepdad. I'll agree that the word prefix doesn't seem all that powerful, but does it impact how the individuals act in those relationships? On the one hand, we consider it a mere technicality... a lack of a biological connection. On the other hand, treating someone like a stepchild has been a dismissive insult (or assault) for as long as I can remember. 

In this episode, James and I share the vulnerabilities we've experienced from both sides of non-biological fatherhood. Our stories are nuanced as is every fatherhood journey, but there are many core principles we share. Parenting in general is a very rewarding gift; however, do we really treat biological and non-biological children equally? If you just answered this question in your head, immediately share your thoughts in the comment section. You'll see how we answered this question by the end of the episode. I hope this blesses you where you are.

#blackparents #blackfathers ##blackexcellence #stepdad #stepfather #stepmom #blendedfamily #fatherandson #dadhacks #emotionalintelligence

Follow James: https://instagram.com/jeyblac

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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My son thinks I'm a whole person, and I think he is amazing. We spent some time catching up on what's going on in his 14 yr-old life. He chronicles his bout with COVID and how it impacted him. I don't take anything my children say for granted as they are dealing with a different pace of information and emotional distress has many flags that are often unrecognized or ignored. I am grateful that he is in a good headspace all things considered.

He also manages to take control of the conversation with a few questions for me. I wasn't shocked by the depth of the questions, but admittedly didn't think he would ask a couple of them on camera. The point of this channel is to expose our journey to a healthier relationship. I'm becoming a better man in the process. Hopefully, this blesses you where you are. 

#blackparents #blackfathers #blackexcellence #fatherandson #dadhacks #emotionalintelligence

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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“Better Man. Better Father.”

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My father taught me everything by telling me nothing. That may sound farfetched to some; however, this will make perfect sense as you progress through this conversation. Jermaine Lewis, Sr is an accomplished writer, business owner, community leader, husband, and father. In this episode he shares several poignant views from his philosophy on male leadership in the household.  These views include allowing children to explore, obedience, family finances, and mutual submission between spouses. I'm certain that you'll leave with an expanded and enriched perspective on the importance of fatherhood, and what family leadership looks like. I pray that it blesses you where you are. 

Connect with Jermaine and support his projects via https://jermainelewis.com

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#blackdoctors #blackfathers #blackexcellence #fatherandson #menshealth

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Leave a legacy of compassion. Dr. Eric Yancey is a general surgeon, and by many standards, is wildly successful. In this episode, he shares the experiences along the road through medical school to establishing medical practices and the how it intersected with parenthood and his relationship with God. Of course we'll get the backdrop of his childhood and relationship with his father for proper context, but you may be surprised by the one thing he wishes he'd done better sooner during his journey.

There are so many practical and informative lessons woven throughout that you'll probably pickup a new one each time you watch or listen. When you're done, be bold enough to share this with someone who needs it.

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#blackdoctors #blackfathers #blackexcellence #fatherandson #menshealth

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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"My dad will never know why his mom didn't want him." David Jones is a well-respected, well-educated business professional with an uncanny ability to see simple solutions amidst seemingly big problems. That's his gift as it pertains to business, but how does that translate into his personal life? Carefully.  High level conversations aside, his fatherhood journey is fascinating, and I left the conversation inspired. 

First, to clarify, David is not yet a father in the traditional sense; however, he processes life through a lens significantly influenced by the relationship he has with his father, and further, how his father's journey progressed. David spent much of his younger years with his great grandmother in Arkansas. She raised his father as well. While this isn't uncommon, I've never considered the commonalities that may (or may not) exist between a father and a son raised by the same woman. Though he recalls the time spent under his great grandmother's care with fondness, there's another side of the coin that reflects the pain that his father endured. 

His father's parents weren't actively involved in his father's life, which resulted in a feeling of emptiness. Thankfully, David's father was determined to break that cycle, and he poured into David the best way he knew how.  He was determined to always be there for his children. David is now a proud husband and family leader, and this conversation challenged him to take more introspective look at what fatherhood means. Let's see if practical business logic can also solve matters of the heart.   

#blackfathers #blackexcellence #fatherandson

Follow David:

IG: https://instagram.com/coahcdavejones

Twitter: https://twitter.com/coachdavejones

Business: https//4ward.Solutions, Inc.: 

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Welcome to another meaningful episode of The Dear Son, Show, where hosts D Johns and Jey Blac dive deep into the life lessons and challenges faced through the lens of fatherhood. This episode tackles critical topics such as choosing friends wisely in adulthood, the acceptability of allowing your friend circle to discipline your child, and the essential nature of having a trustworthy village to help raise your kids. Not only will we explore the importance of these discussions, but we'll also delve into real-life examples and personal stories that illustrate the impact of these decisions. Don't miss this candid and insightful conversation. Like, comment, and subscribe to never miss an episode!

00:00:00 Introduction to the Dear Son Show

00:00:18 Summer Adventures and Content Creation

00:01:24 The TikTok Experience

00:01:56 Disciplining Children: Trust and Boundaries

00:02:46 Generational Differences in Discipline

00:05:16 The Importance of Communication in Discipline

00:09:42 Respect and Consequences in Public Behavior

00:19:20 The Role of Community and Authority

00:24:37 Choosing Friends and Their Impact on Family

00:25:26 Navigating Adult Friendships

00:25:58 Defining Trust and Boundaries

00:26:24 Evaluating Character and Trustworthiness

00:27:24 The Importance of Family and Close Circles

00:28:01 Guarding Your Inner Circle

00:29:52 Teaching Children About Relationships

00:32:07 Life Lessons and Friendships

00:34:25 The Impact of Friends on Life Choices

00:36:13 Support and Loyalty in Friendships

00:37:56 The Role of Village in Parenting

00:45:06 Closing Thoughts and Reflections

#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting  

Follow James: https://instagram.com/jeyblac  

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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This is what protection really looks like. As men we are often challenged to protect our families from harm in all forms, but what does that really look like in the average relationship? Sometimes we don't want to be the voice of reason. Sometimes we just need a reason...I digress. This conversation was inspired by the 2022 Oscars, but we don't say their names. Honestly, the event that trended worldwide sparked a different conversation with me and the guys. We take inventory of what we will and won't do for our families when it comes to protecting them. 

Do you know what your 'line' looks like? You need to have a healthy understanding of what is off limits, and what you're willing to do about it before you're presented with a well-timed, unexpected sla....

Ok...ok...we've all had enough of the word, the reference, and all the Monday-morning quarterbacking that always ensues. This conversation is rich with three varying perspectives from successful black men. I welcome your feedback on the discussion as well as the look and feel of this episode. This has been a journey and I'm enjoying the process. Be blessed.

Follow James:

IG: https://instagram.com/jeyblac

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Follow Anvalon:

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FB: Anvalon Elliott

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

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I lost my dad and found me. Loss is hard. Multiple losses at a young age is even harder. Can you imagine holding a loved one in your arms as life leaves their body? Now, can you imagine taking on this life altering responsibility at the age of 12? Deborah was introduced to heartbreak at a very young age, and the thread continued throughout her early adulthood. 

In this episode we discuss the process of losing her father, and how that reshaped how she saw the world and herself in it. Deb's relationship with her father was somewhat complicated. As a Vietnam vet, he struggled with various vices due to PTSD. She vividly recalled a time when her father would lock himself in the closet with guns and struggles with alcohol. In addition to the loss of her younger sister (referenced above), her parents experienced the lost of Deb's older sister before Deb was born. I cannot imagine that level of pain as a father or a sibling. 

Deb's father was diagnosed with cancer and later passed away in 2016. She had 18 months with him from the time he was diagnosed and shares how their relationship transformed during that period. They connected on a deeper level and Deb found purpose in the process. There's so much more to the story, and this episode fills in the blanks. I am grateful for her transparency, honesty, and courage to reveal some of her past and present traumas, and her continued passion to help others heal.

#teenagemom #abuse #overcomer

Be sure to follow Deb via the social media platforms below:

IG: https://instagram.com/faith100578

IG: https://instagram.com/theXchangeplace

YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCF6oWbPe4uc3E3WJq2wbcIA

The DSP: https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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Dear Dad, you hurt me. For some, being hurt is just a natural part of life. We've all experienced hurt, and likely, have been the source of others' pain. One thing for certain is that none of us can tell another person how to process their pain, grief, or trauma. As a 17-year-old mother to be, Cleo had seen and experienced a lifetime of traumatic events. She vividly recalls a story of police drawing guns on her, her mother and sister, and how she couldn't understand why it was happening in the moment, yet it also seemed to be the norm for her underserved neighborhood in Nashville, TN. 

Her relationship with her father has been strained for most of her life. There were brief glimmers of hope that he would show up for one important life event or another, but ultimately, she had to accept that the relationship she longed for would never be. The void he created impacted how she would see and interact with men throughout her life. Guarded. 

Cleo's story; however, is one of triumph, success, and incredible joy, primarily derived from the relationship she has developed with her daughter. She is an incredible mom, business owner, speaker, and overcomer. She looks nothing like what she has been through. There's so much more to say about this phenomenal woman, and that's what this episode is for. Open your mind and heart as you consume this one, and I'm sure you'll come out of it blessed. 

#teenagemom #abuse #overcomer

Be sure to follow Cleo on the social media:

IG: https://instagram.com/cleoyogfinance

TikTok: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZTdPKLMxf/

YouTube: https://youtube.com/c/CleoYogaFinance

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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3. Help through telling stories of it all

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My dad chose me. This is a perspective that many of us never had to consider. However, many men decide to fill a biological gap for one reason or another. Sometimes it is due to the intentional absence of the birth father, the intentional actions of the birth mother, and a host of other reasons that aren’t germane to this episode. Instead, we celebrate the courage and commitment of my wife’s father to ensure she had a present and accountable father throughout her life.

LaKisha (Kisha) is the oldest of three children and grew up in a modest household with both parents in Hampton, VA. Her fatherhood story begins just a couple years after birth. Her mother and father knew each other from high school, but their love story began years after, also after Kisha was born. While it isn’t clear exactly why her birth father wasn’t around, she made it abundantly clear who her father is. He saw enough in her and her mother to make the investment beyond marriage and adopted Kisha at a very young age. She recalls with fondness the quirky things that her father did to create meaningful experiences for the family, and also touches on how she didn’t always feel like she fit in.

Kisha and her father share the bond of adoption as he was adopted at an early age as well. This gave him a unique, personalized insight on what is important to a child that didn’t have a biological parent in their life. He was her protector, advisor, counselor, and pastor at various stages of her life. As life often does for most of us, Kisha’s firstborn (our oldest) entered the world in somewhat similar circumstances. We discussed those challenges and how they impacted our family along the way. This conversation gave me a new perspective of my life partner, and I’m beyond proud and honored to share a portion of her story with the world. I hope this blesses you. 

#daddysgirl #herodad #adoption

Be sure to follow Kisha on social media and YouTube: 

IG: https://instagram.com/love_kishaj

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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3. Help through telling stories of it all

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My dad is my hero. Those four words bring so much joy to my heart, not only as a father, but as a man that admires strong father-daughter relationships. This is the bond that sets the tone for how women value the relationship with a man, and also teaches men way more about themselves than they may expect. In part two of this series focusing on the woman's perspective of fatherhood, Gia Jordan graciously relives many fond moments of her fatherhood journey.

Gia's father was her superhero as she grew up, and she still sees him through that lens today. She recalls the challenges he faced growing up in Panama as a child with learning disabilities that the educational community of that time wasn't prepared to support or manage. They simply called him dumb. Throughout his life he was told no and discouraged from achieving anything great. Gia also struggled with a learning challenge as a child, and luckily, she had the benefit of her father's triumph as a reference on how to overcome it. He condensed the years of his painful experiences into sound guidance, encouragement, and motivation, which propelled Gia to become successful in school and life.

These are the stories that we need to see and hear about regularly. There is no substitute for a great father-daughter relationship. I truly hope this conversation empowers men to be or stay present in their daughters' lives, and encourages women to treasure and protect these relationships where possible. 

#daddysgirl #herodad #Panama

Be sure to follow Gia on social media and YouTube: 

IG: https://instagram.com/kaizenmindpodcast

YT: https://youtube.com/channel/UC_pmyiYX7f0m7Dbt96hkbYw

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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A woman's perspective on fatherhood is oftentimes dismissed because 'they can't be fathers.' I understand the sentiment, but the value is misplaced. This 5-part series will explore how the fatherhood journey impacts women. We have to acknowledge the cycle; the woman has a father, some choose men to partner with in life, and a subset of that population may birth a baby boy at some point. That boy will grow into manhood and he may choose a woman to partner with in life. Of course, there are many off-ramps and differing scenarios that impact the story, but I think the point is clear.

This is part one of a 5-part series, and my first conversation counterpart did not disappoint. Sade Benson is a loving mother, wife, podcaster, entrepreneur, and owner of a couple successful businesses. SHOP HER KOLLECTION BELOW. Accolades aside, she is a woman with a traumatic story. She is human. Humans hurt. We walked through some of the bitter parts of her past, and how therapy assisted in the overcoming process. The odds were stacked against her, but you wouldn't know it, not at face value anyway.

She lost her mother tragically, became a pseudo caregiver for her younger siblings, and has spent most of her life trying to navigate the relationship with her father after finding out that he wasn't biologically responsible for her existence. This description cannot not do this conversation justice, let alone convey the incredible person that she is. Luckily, you can press play to dive deeper. I pray that you do so and receive this dialogue with an open heart and mind. I hear to help.

Grab a snack and mentally prepare for this one. I’ll meet you in the comments.

#childabuse #molestation #overcoming #blackmenheal #howtoheal #seektherapy

Be sure to follow Sade on social media: 

IG: https://instagram.com/the_storybehindtheceo_podcast

IG: https://instagram.com/KrownMeKollections

Shop the Kollection: https://krownmekollections.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

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2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

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Dear Son, I work hard to create options for you. It is a common theme for many parents to work hard in hopes of providing a better life for their children. For the few radicals, entrepreneurs, that journey can be extremely difficult, frustrating, and unrewarding most of the time. In this episode, I sat down with Joshua (Josh) Wilson to understand how journeys of ‘husbandhood,’ fatherhood, and business builder is intersected, and how he manages through it all when times get rough. 

Josh's story is one of humble beginnings. His biological father was around for the first several years, but that relationship left a lot to be desired. His parents divorced while he was a young boy, and he vividly remembers the pain it caused the family. His mother later remarried and experienced a much more fulfilling relationship, but there was still a void that only a father (or father figure) could fill. He shares some of the painful memories of those times and credits his mother with providing him the unconditional love he needed to get through life. 

Some are frustrated by the pains of the past; others are fueled by those experiences. Josh has developed a rare degree of grit and determination that have propelled him into successful entrepreneurship and, more importantly, business ownership. There's a difference. He credits his wife, Devin, with believing in him (and them) when times got rough, and maintaining order in the home when the tables turned. There's a theme of a woman always being key to his success in life. Of course, there is way more to this story, and you'll get your attention's worth out of this episode.   

Grab a snack and get into this one. I’ll meet you in the comments.

#daddyissues #entrepreneurship #overcoming #fatherhood #howtoheal #seektherapy #offleash #dogtrainer #k9 #doglover #bigdogpodcast

Be sure to follow Josh on social media: 

IG: https://instagram.com/that_dog_trainer

FB: https://www.facebook.com/joshuawilson

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, you can tell me anything, but that! Many fathers and generally 'good' parents across the world live in a fantasy world believing that their children can talk to them about anything. Oftentimes that definition of anything excludes very real topics like rape, molestation, or sexual promiscuity. See, it's much easier to adopt the 'not my child' mentality because it makes us feel good about where we've failed as parents. 

In this episode, Joevan Palmer braves the elements and helps us understand what life was like as a child dealing with molestation, and as an adult that decided to do the work to overcome his childhood traumas. Most importantly, Joevan has dedicated his life to helping others avoid and/or overcome the pain that he has endured. This is truly a redemptive and cinematic story. The more compelling part of the conversation is the expression of how Joevan will impact the world. I'm a believer, and I'd love to hear your feedback once you've watched. This is the first installment of many, and I look forward to watching and contributing to his growth. 

Grab a snack and mentally prepare for this one. I’ll meet you in the comments.

Be sure to follow Joevan on social media: 

IG: https://instagram.com/joevanjpalmer

FB: https://www.facebook.com/joevanjpalmer

Twitter: https://twitter.com/joevanjpalmer

The DSP: https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, listen to your elders. There's such a wealth of information housed in prior generations that, too often, goes unsought. Sure, the world's perspective has and is ever evolving, but sound guidance from an era you never experienced is invaluable. Tim Allston brings decades of experience as a published author, public relations expert, educator, and public speaking professional to this week's show, and this conversation will not disappoint. 

We discussed the lows of the high. In Tim's case, the 'drug' was the command of the room as a public speaker. He references a quote from Johnny Carson, "I am impressive in front of 10 million, but I am horrible in front of 10." What is the real value of the world knowing your name when your family can't stand you? Now, I'm not suggesting that Tim's family wanted to kick him to the curb at times, but I know what it is like to have all of the confidence to communicate to a room full of strangers, and yet struggle to put a coherent string of sentences together at home. I'm willing to bet that several of you can relate. As usual, there's layers to the conversation that you'll only understand through consumption. I'd love to hear your perspective after digesting the whole episode. 

This is a good one. Grab a snack. Meet me in the comments.

The DSP: https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, I am not your father. I’m sure most of us have witnessed this conclusion being sensationalized on a late 90s midday talk show, but can you really put yourself in the shoes of a son hearing this for the first time at the age of 27? I’ve tried, but my imagination doesn’t roam that freely. Unfortunately, this was (and is) the reality for my conversation counterpart, Lamont Moore, on this episode. Several thoughts immediately ran through my head while trying to process the information in real time, but I simply couldn’t imagine what kind of man I’d be today if this were my truth.

Growing up in Shreveport, LA, Lamont was the default role model for his two younger brothers. He resented the role at times but understood the value of setting the right example later in life. He valued the relationship he had with his father growing up, even though they didn’t reside in the same home. Lamont gives us a peak into a few very pivotal moments in his life; his mother’s passing, learning that the man he knew as his dad most of his life really wasn’t his father, and becoming himself. The story about his father’s identity unfolded almost as if it was a movie script. See, it all started when he met this girl in high school…

Grab a snack and mentally prepare for this one. Tag the podcast when you share your thoughts on social media!

Be sure to follow Lamont on social media: 

IG: https://instagram.com/castredale?utm_medium=copy_link

FB: https://www.facebook.com/lamont.moore.50

The DSP: https://thedearsonpodcast.com

Support the podcast by supporting our sponsors: 

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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In this insightful episode of The Dear Son, Show, delve into meaningful conversations about life, fatherhood, and personal growth with host and special guest Quintin Harris. Through compelling dialogue, they explore the nuances of fatherhood, the importance of being present, and navigating the intricacies of marriage. Discover how personal experiences and shared wisdom shape their journey, and gain practical advice on effective parenting and relationship building. Tune in for an episode rich in life lessons and heartfelt moments. Don't forget to subscribe for more engaging conversations.

00:00:00 Introduction to the Dead Sun Show

00:00:17 Meet Quentin Harris

00:00:25 The Brotherhood at Concord

00:01:38 Quentin's Role at Concord

00:03:04 Family Dynamics and Challenges

00:05:15 Growing Up in Baton Rouge

00:07:08 College Life and Lessons Learned

00:21:48 Marriage and Personal Growth

00:28:40 Realizing Insensitivity in Relationships

00:30:01 The Impact of Fatherhood

00:36:04 Corporate Life vs. Home Life

00:41:14 Marriage Challenges and Solutions

00:49:45 Parenting Wisdom and Reflections

01:00:37 Final Thoughts and Future Plans

#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting  

Follow James: https://instagram.com/jeyblac  

Also, if you've made it this far, don't forget to:

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5. share this content with someone who needs it.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

The Dear Son, Network ®

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Dear Son, build a business for your family. We live in a world where the rich get richer, and the poor continuously get the short end of the stick. For some, apathy is the hurdle, and others just can't seem to connect with the right information that can change their lives. The pressure of maintaining adequate finances can be debilitating for some men. On this episode, Chris Williams lets us in on his fatherhood journey that pushed him to overcome the dark shadows of his past and create multiple successful side businesses that have helped position his family to live the life that they desire. 

Though rewarding, the road traveled wasn't all glitz and glamour. He recalls early life in Gainesville, FL and a pivotal tragedy when his brother and Chris' best friend were involved in a car accident that resulted in his brother's death. Chris' best friend was physically injured as well, but the mental trauma far exceeded any of the physical pain. Chris was the youngest of six boys and credits his vantage point as a benefit to see what behaviors he did not want to mimic. 

His life changed when the family relocated to Atlanta, GA. This was the restart he needed, as he navigated his teenage years through sports, entertainment, and a new circle of friends. Today he is a loving husband to one wife, and the proud father of two teenage boys. He has a passion for helping men gain control of their finances through building side businesses. There are so many more layers to Chris, and that's exactly what the full episode reveals. Grab a snack and enjoy this one. If you're inspired to learn more about building a successful side business of your own, contact Chris via the information immediately below. I'll meet you in the comments.

Be sure to visit The World According to Chris: https://twac.live/podcast and follow him on IG: https://instagram.com/thechristopherwilliams

The DSP: https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, I couldn’t coach my way out of this one. Sports is a way of life for many children and adults alike. Many have the love, but not the skill. Then there are those that have both, and a few of them mature into coaching once their playing days are done. George Massenburg’s journey was a pleasure to unpack. As the son of a military father, he knew early on the importance of discipline and reliability. Both are critical traits of any successful athlete, and he credits his father for setting these expectations, not just for sports, but for life. After playing for the greatest high school and arguably one of the greatest high school football team’s ever, the 1996 Hampton Crabbers (Hampton, VA), George went on to play at Virginia State University, and later became a football coach at his former high school and later served as the head coach for Heritage High School (Newport News, VA).

His life experiences on and off the field gave him the tools to be a successful coach. He was able to relate through his struggles with the scholastic and athletic demands of a college athlete, challenges post college as he entered the ‘real world,’ and the humility of having to start over when life didn’t work out as planned. George lets us in on some of the lower points in his life and how therapy helped him manage and, ultimately, overcome those dark phases. It’s beautiful. 

Today, as a public school administrator, he revels in his passion for education and desire to impact students. His proudest accomplishment by far; however, is the relationship he has with his 13-year-old daughter. I mean, he couldn’t hide the joy in his face or tone when speaking about her. His best friend, as she is credited, is his biggest supporter, encourager, and source of purpose. George has so many layers and I’m grateful that he gave us a peek into a few of them during this conversation. Grab a snack and enjoy this one. I’ll meet you in the comment section and/or on any of the DSP social media platforms below.

Be sure to follow George: https://instagram.com/1_lovechasers and his fiancé https://instagram.com/OshiCouture

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, be emotionally fit above all. Sure, we've progressed a bit in recent years by 'allowing' men to feel their feelings, but that isn't enough. Today's guest, Rod, is no stranger to the gym, and has a passion for physical fitness. He has literally dedicated this phase of his life to helping and encouraging men to invest in their physical health and appearance. His approach is not exactly the norm, at least in my experience. He invests more time and energy into transforming the way and what his clients think about themselves. Through this empowering approach, many men credit Coach Rod with the collateral benefit of weight loss. He has the receipts.

His fatherhood story; however, wasn't comprised of all high fives and celebratory fist bumps. As a Bay Area native (Richmond, CA to be exact), he experienced various traumas that shaped his childhood. Just outside of his doorstep awaited gangs, drug dealers and users, drive-by shootings, and inside his home he experienced the heartache of his parents' divorce. His mom ensured he was rooted in faith and kept him in church most days of the week. Rod became an athlete very early in his childhood, ultimately excelling in baseball and football, which afforded him a full college scholarship.

I could write several more paragraphs about this phenomenal man, but that's what the podcast is for. Grab a snack. This is gonna be a great one!

ROD'S OFFERING THE DSP FAMILY AN EARLY BIIRD SPECIAL!

Click the link below for details on how to register and receive your FAST ACTION BONUS with crazy incentives! The challenge starts on January 31, 2022.

https://potential4performance.mypthub.net/3/p/162214

Missed the challenge? Checkout https://4fitfatherhood.com to see his current offerings and also find his podcast.

You can find the rest of Rod's offerings via the link below:

https://linktr.ee/ucancallmecoach

The DSP: https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, I need you back in my life. Many relationships begin with the best of intentions. The air smells sweeter, the flowers are bloom-ier, and all  seems right with the world. Then, as with any relationship, problems arise and character is revealed. Add children to the mix and it becomes more than some can or prefer to handle. James has experienced the hurt as a child and as an adult, and the impact at each stage is damaging. 

In this episode, we conversed about his humble beginnings as a child growing up in Shreveport, LA. Though he will forever regard it as his home with fondness, there were several memories that were painful to replay from his life there. Primarily raised by his mother and aunt, he recalls the financial hardships, constant moves, and the resulting school fights because he was the new guy. In middle school, he lost his big brother, who was his best friend, and essentially his identity. Anything big bro did, he wanted to do, and they spent everyday together until his big brother's untimely death. Compound these challenges with a pervasive gang culture right outside of his front door, and you'd potentially have.a recipe for disaster. 

Fortunately, James' story is one of overcoming. He survived the streets and navigated his way through early adulthood by way of college and the military. A tumultuous relationship yielded heartache and distrust, but also blessed the parents with three beautiful children. He later found love again with his current wife and was blessed with three more children. Life still hurts at times because he longs to have a relationship with his oldest son from the first marriage. He manages to wear a smile through that pain, and channels his energy into mentoring boys and young men to help them cope with and make better decisions in life. As he referenced, "he's lived 31 lives," and I'm grateful that he stopped by to share a few highlights with us.  Be blessed, Fam. I'll see you in the comments.

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, you were just too different to love. Imagine being the youngest child and watching your siblings receiving love from the family differently. No explanations given, just different treatment. Compound that with being called ‘weird’ or worse, just because as a young boy you prefer to be in the band vice being an all-star athlete. This is sadly the case for many children, and it is especially painful for your young boys who want nothing more than to be validated by their fathers. Conversely, many fathers from generations past weren’t equipped with a high level of emotional intelligence or provided an example of fatherhood beyond being a provider. It’s easy to stand on one side and cast blame on the other, but that’s not what this platform is about. 

In this episode, Anvalon shares with us how similar circumstances impacted his life at an early age, and later played out negatively in his adult years. The story doesn’t end there, thankfully. He has learned to turn those painful years and negative behaviors into an uncanny level of self-awareness and desire to help others through sharing his journey. I’m grateful that he chose this platform as part of that process. I urge you to listen attentively as I’m sure there will be at least one truth that will resonate with you. If only we all could walk in truth daily. Be blessed, Fam. I'll see you in the comments.

#fatherhood #blackmenheal #fatherandson

Dear Son, you were just too different to love.

I'll see you in the comments. 

Follow Anvalon to keep up with his story:

https://instagram.com/iamanvalon

https://twitter.com/iamanvalon

https://facebook.com/anvalonelliott

#blackmenheal #overcomingtrauma

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

Support the pod by supporting our sponsors: 

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Dear Son, I woke up on a park bench. What would be a humbling, better yet humiliating experience for most didn't brake Jaraud's spirit. At one of his lowest moments, he found himself taking shelter on a park bench in the Algiers area of New Orleans. Not sure where he'd find his next meal, he found the courage to will (and work) his way out of those circumstances. Not once did he blame others or feel sorry for himself. He simply "figured it out." This became a them throughout the phases of his life that he shared during this conversation. When life gets hard, he finds.a way. Now that he is a father, Jaraud has some very tough decisions manage. He is extremely passionate about changing the world and mapped out plans to do so. Then he became a father unexpectedly. Of course this changes everything, but does that mean he has to abandon his goals and purpose? There's one sure way to find out. Grab a snack and enjoy.

Follow Jaraud to keep up with his story:

https://instagram.com/iam_kingmac7

https://instagram.com/royalknowledgepodcast

#blackmenheal #overcomingtrauma

https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, prison walls can’t separate us. Imagine being separated from your father at the age of two…for any reason. For some, this could be the start of a miserable life filled with anger, sadness, and regret (and understandably so). That’s not at all how this story plays out. Although he certainly felt the pain of his father not being around physically, Derrin was consumed with love from his family that eased the pain. Most notably, his mother poured into him beyond measure, and protected…no, promoted the relationship between him and his incarcerated father. They both waited patiently, believing daily that the family be would physically be reunited. After serving 27 years, Derrin’s father was released from prison, and they picked up continued the relationship he’d longed for his entire life.

Derrin is a mild-mannered, respectful man, husband, and father. He made a conscious choice throughout his life to focus on the good. Even when presented with examples of what his character shouldn’t be, he chose to find the lesson in what not to do. He is mature beyond his years and revels in the joy of fatherhood. “I just want to be a great father,” he confessed during our conversation. I think he’s closer to greatness that he even knows. Give this one your full attention and let me know your thoughts in the comments (YouTube) or via social media if you prefer. There’s also an option to leave a voice note (link below), if you really want your voice heard. Be sure to follow him on social media and buy his merch if you’re also 2Stubborn2Fail.

#fatherhood #blackmenheal #fatherandson

Derrin’s Info:

https://2stubborn2fail.com

https://instagram.com/2stubborn2fail

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Dear Son, let that rage out! I had the pleasure of catching up with one of the legends from my hometown, Hampton, VA (757). Ahmad put on a show every time he touched the football field. His sports highlights can easily be found with a quick Google search, and would keep you glued to the screen for hours upon hours even if you’re not a football fan. What won’t be so obvious in the search results are the trials and challenges that riddled his life from a very young age. He opens up about his relationship with his father, [literally] fighting through life in elementary and middle schools, being envious of the spotlight in high school, making tough mental adjustments in college. See, his father and big cousin, Sean Hamlet instilled the discipline and toughness he needed to be great on the field, but he struggled with anger and managing his emotions off the field. It isn’t all doom and gloom though. The story pivots beautifully, and we get to know the mature professional athlete, loving husband, devoted and caring father, and community enthusiast that answered the call to inspire greatness through running the streets of Charlottesville, VA. While I’m not qualified to summarize his life in just a few paragraphs, I can say that I walked away from this conversation inspired. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below via the social media platforms below.   

#UVA #wahoo #HamptonHigh #ColoradoCrush 

Web site: https://ahmadhawkins.com

IG: https://instagram.com/iamballhawk

shop: https://sthujuice.com

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Dear Son, I'm afraid to heal. This was a very sobering topic for me to address. I had to admit that not only was I broken in many ways, but I was comfortable in that state because I was afraid of what healing required from me. Selfish? Most certainly. However, I don't think that I'm the only man that has some aversion to the healing process. I do not like the unknown. I do not like not being in control. I do not like changing while it feels like the world is watching. But change, I must. Do you embrace change in general? More specifically, how eager are you to heal when it requires some uncomfortable work to get there? These are my top 10 reasons why I'm afraid to heal. I'd love to know if any of them resonate with you. Feel free to leave a voice note via the link below, or comment on a related IG post (see below).  #blackmenheal 

Top 10 Reasons Why I'm Afraid To Heal:

1.  Healing requires me to be honest about parts of me that I’ve tried to hide from myself.

2.  Healing exposes feelings that I’m not currently equipped to manage. Sometimes those feelings weren’t nurtured as a child.

3.  Healing makes me uncomfortable.

4.  Healing removes excuses that once allowed me to operate at my lowest frequency (lower self).

5.  Healing hurts those around me.

6.  Healing looks silly to others, and I’d rather be cool than be complete.

7.  Healing takes a commitment that has no specific duration (

8.  Healing requires me to surrender control.

9.  Healing brings clarity, and I may not like what I see.

1. Healing raises the standard by which I must abide in all areas of my life.

https://thedearsonpodcast.com

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The three pillars of the DSP Community?

1.  Reveal trauma

2.  Heal from trauma

3.  Help through stories

“Better Man. Better Father.”

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Dear Son, time heals nothing. This perspective contradicts what most of us have been fed our entire lives, “time heals all wounds.” While there is merit to being sensitive to the timing of the necessary actions, the actions are necessary. Today’s conversation with Dr. Yardan Shabazz prompted me to take an inventory of my relationships and how I value them based on my actions. I realized how good I was at leaving things to chance. Sure, if there is a financial outcome or professional recognition attached, I’ve historically been more attentive to these things. Relationships though…I could take or leave some of them because my pride was bigger than my heart.

This conversation with Dr. Shabazz is riveting to say the least. As his name may suggest (to some) his family has a very rich, deep history with several iconic figures that shaped this nation’s history. His life what not a cakewalk by any stretch, and he provides insight to the economic, social, and political challenges that his family endured. His fatherhood story is riddled with tough love, rejection, and pain, all of which fueled him to be a successful educator, author, business owner, husband, and father.

This conversation was a joy, and it was also heavy. Dr. Shabazz and I had meaningful revelations that prompted us to take actions after. For him, the action was to engage with his father as their communication had deteriorated over the years. It proved to be a very timely engagement as his father passed away a few days later. He agreed to move forward with airing this episode as it is part of the testimony (his and this platform’s) and may help someone as God designs. Time heals nothing. Action does.

My condolences are extended to the Shabazz family. May Minister James Shabazz rest in peace.

IG: https://www.instagram.com/dr.shabazz/

www.thedearsonpodcast.com

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In this captivating episode of The Dear Son, Show, hosts Jey Blac and D Johns dive deep into the realm of double standards. Designed to provide young boys and men with wisdom they can use today, this conversation addresses the real-life implications of double standards across parenting, relationships, and societal expectations. Discover Jay Black's and D John's personal experiences and candid thoughts on subjects such as the differing rules for sons and daughters, the unique dynamics in marital relationships, and the societal pressures young men face today. Don't miss out on this engaging discussion that offers both heartfelt advice and relatable anecdotes. Subscribe now to stay updated with our insightful conversations!

00:00:00 Introduction and Greetings

00:00:28 Parenting Challenges and Curfews

00:02:41 Double Standards in Parenting

00:04:23 Curfews and Responsibilities

00:06:29 Gender Roles and Expectations

00:10:40 Teaching Life Skills

00:14:09 Balancing Discipline and Freedom

00:25:38 Navigating Double Standards in Relationships

00:26:05 The Unspoken Rules of Marriage

00:28:14 Personal Experiences and Lessons Learned

00:30:47 The Consequences of Double Standards

00:41:42 Parenting and Double Standards

00:47:50 Final Thoughts and Reflections

#Raisingboysandgirls #FamilyTalk #singleparents #adultchildren #Parenting  

Follow James: https://instagram.com/jeyblac  

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The Three Foundational Pillars of the DSP Community

1. Reveal trauma 

2. Heal from trauma

3. Help through telling stories of it all

“Better Man. Better Father.”

The Dear Son, Network ®

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Dear Son, I've had one too many. Can you imagine having to explain that to your oldest son (or any family member for that matter)? Rudy's story is riddled with highs and lows, and his transparency is sure to help someone. Ultimately, he beat the odds and has reclaimed his greatness through overcoming alcoholism, restoring family relationships, and ultimately becoming the man he and his family can celebrate with pride. This is a must listen for anyone who has struggled with, seen, or simply is compassionate toward that struggle with addictions. I was truly blessed by this conversation, and I pray that you will gain something from it as well. 

www.thedearsonpodcast.com

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Dear Son, I'm listening. No really, I hear you. This will forever be the most meaningful conversation I have on this platform as it is reflection of how the podcast was birthed. See, I wasn't great at communicating important life lessons to my son. Heck, I'm still a work in progress. The articulation has never been my challenge, but great articulation does not a great communicator make (at least not that alone). This journey is about overcoming the fears, the inadequacies, the shortcomings of being father. I am convinced that we can shift the trajectory of the next generation of fathers through vulnerable, transparent conversations about fatherhood. Me and my lofty dreams....I get it. This is the cause, my hill if you will, upon which my life's work will be built. Legacy.

The condensed version is that I love my sons (and daughters equally), and will invest in them daily to ensure they are prepared for the world that awaits. Grab a snack and enjoy. This is going to be a great one! Be blessed, fam.

#fatherhood #blackfathers #breakingnegativecycles #iloveyouson

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Dear Son, save your community. In this episode of The Dear Son, Podcast, we take a journey with community advocate, Tracey Parker, as he reveals the why behind his mission. He chronicles his life’s challenges and triumphs. The Newport News (VA) native learned the importance of ‘the village’ concept very early as he depended on friends and extended family members to fill the void of his biological parents not being in his life consistently. Tracey excelled in sports during his adolescent years, and found a father-figure in a high school coach. His life has been a roller coaster of highs and lows, but he found purpose when he met his Queen (Joy) who showed him unconditional love and ultimately challenged him to be a better man. Today, Tracey’s mission is to save everyone, literally. Lofty? Perhaps. His innate desire to help so many is reflective of the pain he experienced throughout his life. He simply doesn’t want others to experience it. There’s so much more to glean from this conversation, and I sincerely hope that you give it the attention due. The Friendship Lottery: The Friendship Lottery, founded by Tracey Parker and Noelle Parker, is a 501c3 non-profit organization on a mission to empower and educate our communities through outreach, partnerships with other non-profits, advocacy and financial blessings http://thefriendshiplottery.com/ info.thefriendshiplottinc@gmail.com instagram.com/thefriendshiplottery www.thedearsonpodcast.com Support the pod by supporting our sponsors: Johns & Co Apparel: www.johnsandcompany.co Love Kisha J Studios: www.etsy.com/shop/LoveKishaJStudios Let’s connect socially: www.instagram.com/thedearsonpodcast www.twitter.com/dearsonpodcast www.facebook.com/thedearsonpodcast --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app

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