You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for the…

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Does Your Parent Mean to Hurt You? Why Intent Doesn’t Matter (and What Actually Does)

mercredi 1 avril 2026 • Durée 14:39

When you grow up with an emotionally unpredictable or narcissistic parent, it’s easy to get stuck trying to figure out their intent especially when there were both good and painful moments.

In this episode, we’re breaking down why that question keeps you stuck and what actually matters when it comes to healing and setting boundaries.

Because the truth is, it’s not about whether they mean to hurt you. It’s about what they continue to do and how it impacts you.

Show Notes:

Get a free sneak peak into The Cycle Breaker's Vault (use code VAULT50 until 4/9 to get $50 off the entire course): https://www.confidentboundaries.com/offers/dWG3vaJd/checkout

Subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Learn more about therapy with Torie:
https://toriewikselltherapy.com/

Follow Torie on Social:
https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist
https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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Why You Intellectualize Your Feelings (and Why It’s So Hard to Stop)

mardi 24 mars 2026 • Durée 16:11

In this episode, I’m talking about why that happens and why “just feel your feelings” isn’t actually helpful for most people who grew up in chaotic or emotionally unpredictable family environments.

When you grow up with a parent who lacks emotional regulation skills, you learn to analyze, anticipate, and problem-solve. Not because something is wrong with you, but because it helped you function in an environment that didn’t feel safe.

In this episode, we’ll get into:

-Why intellectualizing your emotions is a learned survival response
-Why feeling your emotions can feel unsafe or inaccessible
-The role safety plays in being able to process emotions
-Why you might feel stuck even if you want to heal

Healing isn’t about forcing yourself to feel more. It’s about creating enough safety to feel brave enough to feel.

Subscribe to You're Not Crazy: The Private Feed:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Learn more about therapy with Torie:
https://toriewikselltherapy.com/

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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Forgiveness Is Overrated: What Actually Helps You Heal from a Toxic Parent

mardi 17 mars 2026 • Durée 23:12

In this episode, we’re talking about:

Why forgiveness is often misunderstood
Why you don’t need to forgive your parent to heal
How focusing on forgiveness can actually keep you stuck
The difference between forgiveness and healing
Why acceptance is what actually helps you move forward
What “radical acceptance” looks like in real life

Listen to learn more about the fallacy of forgiveness and what it actually takes to heal from growing up within a dysfunctional family system.

Interested in therapy with Torie?
If you’re an adult living in California, Oregon, or Washington and are interested in working together in therapy, you can learn more and schedule a free phone consultation here:

https://toriewikselltherapy.com/schedule

Support the show and get more episodes
Join the private podcast feed for access to bonus episodes, archived episodes, and ad-free versions of all new episodes:

https://www.confidentboundaries.com/youre-not-crazy-podcast

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

The Basic Needs Cycle Breakers Often Ignore (And How This Wrecks Your Mental Health)

mardi 10 mars 2026 • Durée 17:53

In this episode, we’re going back to the basics and talking about why things like staying hydrated, eating enough, sleeping, and moving your body matter far more for your mental health than most people realize.

We cover:

• Why cycle breakers often disconnect from their own needs
• How dysfunctional family dynamics train you to ignore your basic needs
• The mental health impact of dehydration, hunger, and exhaustion
• Why boundaries are often required just to take care of yourself
• Simple ways to start prioritizing your basic needs again

Sometimes prioritizing your healing means something as simple as drinking enough water.

Interested in therapy with Torie?
If you’re an adult living in California, Oregon, or Washington and are interested in working together in therapy, you can learn more and schedule a free phone consultation here:

https://toriewikselltherapy.com/schedule

Support the show and get more episodes
Join the private podcast feed for access to bonus episodes, archived episodes, and ad-free versions of all new episodes:

https://www.confidentboundaries.com/youre-not-crazy-podcast

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

I Could Win a Gold Medal in Overexplaining Myself: Growing Up With a Narcissistic Parent

mardi 3 mars 2026 • Durée 20:57

When you spend your childhood being misunderstood, projected onto, or told who you are instead of being seen for who you actually are, it makes sense that you carry that fear of being misunderstood into adulthood.

In this episode, I talk about:

• Why adult children of narcissistic parents often overexplain themselves
• What it feels like to grow up being constantly misunderstood
• Why this pattern tends to show up more when you’re overwhelmed or depleted
• What real healing actually looks like when these habits still pop up

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Support the podcast + get access to bonus, archived, and ad-free episodes: Join You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed to support the growth of the show and get access to bonus episodes, the entire archive, and ad-free new episodes each week! Join here:

https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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The Guilt Trap: How This Tricky Emotion Keeps Cycle Breakers Stuck

mardi 24 février 2026 • Durée 20:35

In this episode, we explore:

Why guilt feels so overwhelming for adult children of emotionally immature and narcissistic parents
How dysfunctional family systems train you to equate guilt with being a bad person
The difference between healthy guilt and manipulative guilt
Why avoiding guilt keeps you stuck in the toxic cycle
How to approach difficult decisions without avoiding or agreeing to things beyond your capacity

Learning to sit with guilt instead of immediately jumping into avoidance or problem-solving mode is a skill that many of us cycle breakers were never taught. Listen to this episode to learn more about building the healthy skills necessary to confidently navigate guilt as a cycle breaker.

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Support the podcast + get bonus episodes: Join You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed to support the growth of the show and get access to bonus episodes, the entire archive, and ad-free new episodes each week! Join here:

https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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When Parents Say They’re “Walking on Eggshells” Around You: The Truth About Power, Boundaries, and Gaslighting

mardi 17 février 2026 • Durée 16:38

If you grew up with a parent who had narcissistic or borderline traits, you may have heard this when you started setting boundaries, going to therapy, or naming the dysfunction in your family.

In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we unpack:

Why “walking on eggshells” is not the same thing in a parent-child relationship
The lifelong power imbalance that doesn’t magically disappear when you turn 18
Why toxic parents often say this when you stop being compliant
How this narrative twists reality and creates a false “both sides” story
The subtle gaslighting behind “I have to walk on eggshells around you, too”

When a parent says this, it often isn’t about your behavior. It’s about their discomfort with accountability. It’s about losing control of a dynamic where you were expected to stay small, agreeable, and emotionally accommodating.

If you’ve started therapy, begun setting boundaries with a toxic parent, or noticed pushback when you stop playing your assigned role in the family, this episode will help you understand what’s actually happening.

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Support the growth of the show and get access to bonus content by joining You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed.

Plus, you'll get ad-free versions of all new episodes when you join:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

When Dysfunction Is “Normal”: Subtle Emotional Abuse in Toxic Families and Why It’s So Damaging

mardi 10 février 2026 • Durée 18:56

In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, therapist and boundaries coach Torie Wiksell breaks down common behaviors that toxic families often label as “normal,” but that are actually deeply damaging and abusive. We talk about why these dynamics are so confusing, why they impact you as deeply as they do, and why your reactions are not a personal flaw.

You’ll learn:

Why emotional and psychological abuse in families is often minimized or dismissed
How power and control shape parent-child dynamics, even in adulthood
Why stonewalling, silent treatment, shaming, and gaslighting are not “just family stuff”
How abuse creates confusion, self-doubt, and emotional exhaustion over time
How naming abuse accurately can be a powerful step toward clarity and healing

If you’ve ever questioned whether it was “really that bad,” struggled to trust your own emotional reactions, or felt drawn to content about toxic parents while doubting your experience, this episode offers grounding, validation, and context.

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

Love the podcast? Support the show (and get access to bonus content)

Get ad-free episodes, bonus content, and access to archived episodes by joining You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed.
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Schedule a Therapy Phone Consultation

If you’re interested in talking about working with Torie in therapy, use the following link to schedule a free phone consultation. Must be located in CA, OR, or WA.

https://toriewikselltherapy.com/schedule

Why Setting Boundaries With Toxic Parents Is So Hard (And What Most People Get Wrong)

mardi 3 février 2026 • Durée 16:26

In this episode of You're Not Crazy, I walk through the most common reasons boundaries fail with narcissistic, emotionally immature, and toxic parents. Not because you did it wrong, but because most people are taught a version of boundaries that doesn’t account for manipulation, emotional dysregulation, guilt, or the survival responses cycle breakers carry into adulthood.

We talk about:

-Why using the word “boundary” often backfires with toxic parents

-What a boundary actually is (and why it’s about your behavior, not controlling theirs)

-How toxic parents escalate when they feel dysregulated or lose access to you

-Why guilt, panic, and urgency show up after you set limits

-How not enforcing a boundary teaches your parent to push harder

-Why boundaries without an enforcement plan almost always collapse

This episode is especially for adults who intellectually understand boundaries but still find themselves caving when their parent panics, guilt-trips, or emotionally escalates. If you’ve ever thought, “I know what I should do, but I can’t seem to follow through,” this conversation will give you clarity and language for what’s really happening.

This is also why boundary work with toxic parents requires more than scripts or one-off advice. It requires understanding the family system, the manipulation tactics, and your own nervous system responses so you can follow through without self-abandoning.

Follow Torie on Social:

https://www.instagram.com/cyclebreakertherapist

https://www.tiktok.com/@cyclebreakertherapist

And if you want access to more episodes of the podcast, sign up for You'll be supporting the growth of the show while getting access to archived, bonus, and ad-free episodes of You're Not Crazy:

Why This Feels So Familiar: Toxic Parents, Abuse, and What’s Happening in the U.S.

mardi 27 janvier 2026 • Durée 19:02

The gaslighting, denial, deflection, and rewriting of reality mirror the dynamics many adults grew up with in toxic or narcissistic family systems. Torie explains how ongoing trauma impacts emotional capacity, why trauma that is still happening cannot be healed (only coped with), and how the pressure to respond perfectly often leads to paralysis.

For listeners who feel overwhelmed, stuck, and at a loss for how to move forward right now, this episode provides context, validation, and grounded perspective.

Support the podcast and listen ad-free
Join You’re Not Crazy: The Private Feed for bonus and archived episodes plus ad-free listening:
https://www.confidentboundaries.com/private

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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