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TitreDateDurée
Ep358 – Retreat Roundtable: Feeling Safe with Strangers in the Woods27 Jul 202601:17:33

What is it like to feel safe to speak your mind and explore your emotions? No fear of reaction. No one telling you what to do. Listen to Jen, Nikki, Mike, Tara, Jennifer, and Avia explain the value they find in growing and recovering in a no-judgement zone on this roundtable discussion live from the Echoes of Recovery 2026 summer retreat in the Colorado Rocky Mountains.

Please go to UntoxicatedSurvey.org to better understand the impact of alcohol and/or emotional abuse on you and your family. Whether you are the drinker or the partner, whether you feel a lack of emotional safety or don’t really know what that means, we can help you feel supported. Take the survey and learn more about our Echoes of Recovery and SHOUT Sobriety programs. You’ve got this, and we’ve got you.

Ep357 – Sober Living Roundtable20 Jul 202601:31:43

What is sober living, anyway? If an alcoholic has completed detox and treatment, why do they need a sober living environment? Matt used to think sober living was a sign of weakness, and Sheri thought it was a place where they used nicotine as a wall covering. But once they met Kyle, Rebecca, and Nathan, this episode’s panelists, Sheri and Matt learned the incredible value of sober living for former drinkers and partners. Click here to read Kyle’s full story of hopelessness from 2019.

Please go to UntoxicatedSurvey.org to better understand the impact of alcohol and/or emotional abuse on you and your family. Whether you are the drinker or the partner, whether you feel a lack of emotional safety or don’t really know what that means, we can help you feel supported. Take the survey and learn more about our Echoes of Recovery and SHOUT Sobriety programs. You’ve got this, and we’ve got you.

Exorcising the “F” Word28 May 202600:11:08

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addiction, please go to SoberAndUnashamed.com. We hope you get a lot out of: “Exorcising the ‘F’ Word”

“You don’t need to come. I’m not dying.”

My mom had surgery last week, and that’s what she said when she heard I was flying across the country to help my dad, and to spend time with her, after her surgery.

I think her response is part consideration for my busy life–not wanting to be a burden to her not-close-to-retirement son with a bustling family, and part defiance that the surgery posed any kind of risk for her. I get it.

And she’s right. I am busy. But damn it, I just keep thinking about my understanding of what people say…

If you are ready to consider the impact of alcohol and a lack of emotional safety, on you and your family, as the drinker or the partner of a drinker, please take our brief survey at UntoxicatedSurvey.org so we can share resources, including a free ebook.

Ep304 – Putting Confidence into Action Roundtable14 Jul 202501:18:33

Live from the 2025 Echoes of Recovery retreat along Bear Creek in the Rocky Mountains our roundtable discusses the challenges of putting their confidence that their partners’ drinking is problematic into the right action steps. It is difficult. It is a process. Please listen if you could use some tips on putting knowing into action.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: Do You See What I See?10 Jul 202500:06:23

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Do You See What I See?”

We have published hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to this audio version of our latest written offering titled: “Do You See What I See?”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep303 – Questions for Sheri07 Jul 202501:06:20

Unfiltered and unprepped, Sheri answers a wide range of emotional and tactical questions about how she navigated Matt’s alcoholism and sobriety, and what she might have done if faced with different circumstances. Sheri earns here elite preferred status on this episode.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: Insignificance03 Jul 202500:08:29

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Insignificance”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Insignificance”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep302 – Breathing Room Roundtable30 Jun 202501:29:42

We talked about the decision to stay or to go on Ep69. Ep214 and 217 were both roundtable episodes with people who had separated and divorced. On the flip side, Ep242 and 243 were roundtables featuring people who had decided to stay in their relationships. This episode is a twist on all of those discussions. The Ep302 roundtable tackles the topic of therapeutic temporary separation with the intent of getting back together. In some cases, the time apart helped the relationship, and in other cases, it helped clarify the need to make the separation permanent. For all four of our panelists, the separation helped them make incredible individual progress toward healing.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Ep301 – Foreplay in Alcoholism Recovery23 Jun 202501:13:50

Foreplay is often thought of as erotic touch intended for sexual stimulation. Sheri and Matt have conducted research with thirteen couples recovering their partnerships from alcoholism. The research indicates that establishing emotional intimacy in a relationship might be a much more effective form of foreplay with the potential to improve sexual satisfaction by 40%. That’s a big number.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you are ready to leave alcohol behind and explore growth and recovery with a modern approach to sobriety, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Sober and Unashamed: An Open Letter to My Children19 Jun 202500:14:51

New from Sober and Unashamed: “An Open Letter to My Children”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “An Open Letter to My Children”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep300 – Hummingbird Ninjas Reunion Roundtable16 Jun 202501:35:19

The Hummingbird Ninjas are the OGs of the Echoes of Recovery program – our support group for the loved ones of alcoholics. This reunion roundtable episode is an update on their progress in growth and discovery since their attendance at the first ever Echoes of Recovery live retreat in the summer of 2022 where they recorded Ep150. The changes are amazing. These women are thriving – some in relationships in recovery, and some leading their best lives post-marriage. Listen to their answers when asked at the end of the episode if they would come back together for a week in the mountains.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: Dance Like Everybody’s Watching12 Jun 202500:12:35

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Dance Like Everybody’s Watching”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Dance Like Everybody’s Watching”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep299 – A “Living Amends” is Total Crap09 Jun 202500:55:59

Doing the hard work of recovery, for the former drinker and the partner, is how we reduce anxiety, regulate our nervous systems, start to rebuild trust, and grow to our potential. There is no bigger gift to our families than to prioritize our recoveries. Sheri and Matt discuss things that do not prioritize recovery work, and are, therefore, total crap. They also talk about ear hair and porn and Sheri’s cat’s popularity on YouTube, so hang on for twists and turns.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Ep349 – Emotional Safety and Raising Kids25 May 202601:21:22

When it comes to parenting, there is no shortage of generational trauma cycle breaking to be addressed. Sheri and Matt talk about the two-generation cycle breaking they are working on with their kids, to implement 100% emotional safety after years of alcoholism, emotional abuse, and Matt’s mindset that it was his job to make his kids tough and resilient. They also talk about cats and Hawaiian shirts and grad parties.

Please go to UntoxicatedSurvey.org to better understand the impact of alcohol and/or emotional abuse on you and your family. Whether you are the drinker or the partner, whether you feel a lack of emotional safety or don’t really know what that means, we can help you feel supported. Take the survey and learn more about our Echoes of Recovery and SHOUT Sobriety programs. You’ve got this, and we’ve got you.

Sober and Unashamed: Cabbage Overdose05 Jun 202500:10:27

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Cabbage Overdose”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Cabbage Overdose”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep298 – Defining You with Kathy and Nikki02 Jun 202501:12:10

Kathy and Nikki have lived through the trauma and chaos of alcoholism. With both of their husbands now years into sobriety, Kathy and Nikki are evolving their recovery work into continued growth and self care with the Defining You podcast and facebook page. Are you curious about what’s next beyond recovery? Kathy and Nikki explore challenges and interests that might challenge and interest you, too.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: An Evolving Tradition29 May 202500:09:17

New from Sober and Unashamed: “An Evolving Tradition”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “An Evolving Tradition”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep297 – Time Makes Recovery Three Dimensional26 May 2025

For a long time – through early sobriety and years into growth and recovery – Matt shared the blame for his addiction with his father, with Big Beverage, with AA, and with other societal influences. He shared the blame because he couldn’t carry the stigma and burden himself. Only through the powerful recovery dimension of time can Matt own the blame for his addiction and peacefully release the people and institutions who served a vital role in helping him get over the guilt and shame.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: Who the f&@% is this guy?22 May 202500:11:57

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Who the f&@% is this guy?”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Who the f&@% is this guy?”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep296 – Sexual Desire Discrepancy is a Cause and Result of Alcoholism19 May 202501:11:00

Sheri and Matt share findings about sexual desire discrepancy in relationships impacted by alcoholism from a year-long study of 13 couples now in recovery. Matt shares an unnecessarily large amount of data which Sheri tempers with eye rolls you can actually hear through your speakers. The bottom line: Alcoholism both exacerbates and results from sexual desire discrepancy, and the solutions are empathy, understanding, communication, and emotional safety.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: Accumulation15 May 202500:12:48

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Accumulation”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Accumulation”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep295 – The Empty Path with Billy Wynne12 May 202501:18:39

Billy Wynne has been a student of Buddhism and mindfulness for 30 years, and he teaches and is on the board at the Zen Center of Denver. Billy joins Sheri and Matt to talk about the philosophies and lived experiences featured in his new book, The Empty Path: Finding Fulfillment through the Radical Art of Lessening. Billy’s pursuit of material success conflicted with his Buddhist practices, and led him to medicate his stress and lack of fulfillment with alcohol. Now alcohol-free, he is the perfect ambassador of this relatable and compassionate message about gaining so much by letting go.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Sober and Unashamed: Momentum07 May 202500:11:23

New from Sober and Unashamed: “Momentum”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Momentum”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep294 – The Two Requirements for Successful Recovery05 May 202501:07:04

Lasting sobriety and recovery from alcoholism requires both commitment and a plan, and the role of the partner in the recovery of the drinker is quite limited. On this episode, Sheri and Matt go into detail, and share lots of options, for what will, and will not, meet these two requirements leading to successful recovery.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Humans. Am I Right?21 May 202600:13:44

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addiction, please go to SoberAndUnashamed.com. We hope you get a lot out of: “Humans. Am I Right?”

Humans.

We humans do some really strange things. Am I right?…

If you are ready to consider the impact of alcohol and a lack of emotional safety, on you and your family, as the drinker or the partner of a drinker, please take our brief survey at UntoxicatedSurvey.org so we can share resources, including a free ebook.

Sober and Unashamed: Numbers30 Apr 202500:06:55

New from the “Underlying Issues” series on Sober and Unashamed: “Numbers”

Maybe you are unaware of our hundreds of essays on alcoholism, recovery, sex and intimacy, underlying issues, growth and progress. Or maybe you love to read, but just don’t seem to find the time. We hope you’ll listen to our latest written offering titled: “Numbers”

To read this and much more, check out or Sober and Unashamed Blog.

Ep293 – How Work Plus Time Equals Progress with Lori28 Apr 202501:09:52

Lori is a five-time guest on the podcast for very good reason – she brings a fresh an intelligent perspective to every conversation. On this episode, Lori explains the emotional safety she is experiencing in her marriage, and how replacing bad memories with good combines with her faith, and her own person trauma and resentment processing work, to bring her joy and peacefulness. She does the work, and she lets time in sobriety work on her marriage.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Ep292 – The Fog of Chronic Addiction21 Apr 202500:53:58

Acute addiction gets all the headlines – when the drinker drinks too much and creates chaos and trauma. But the fog chronic alcoholism rolls into the spaces between drinks – when the alcoholic is temporarily sober but operating with a warped mind. The fog of chronic alcoholism impacts the loved ones and the drinker in different ways.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Ep291 – Nervous System Leads the Way with Rose14 Apr 202501:09:16

Rose stayed in her alcoholic marriage until she could stay no longer. The impact on her nervous system made her methodical and planned decision to separate her only choice. Listen to Rose reflect on the turning points she experienced as she felt her nervous system heal.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Ep290 – Alcoholic Gaslighter’s Top Ten List07 Apr 202501:07:18

Sheri and Matt run through the top ten things alcoholics say to their partners. Do you recognize your relationship in their conversation?

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org.

Ep289 – Tied to No Particular Outcome with John Olander31 Mar 202500:55:59

Trigger warning: Domestic violence is discussed

John Olander has a network of relationships all over Denver, and he is as tenacious as he is inspiring. But John experienced 20 dark years, crossing over the line from high-functioning alcoholism into self-inflicted, alcohol-fueled legal issues which led to homelessness and isolation. But he bounced back, and his is a true success story of letting go and leaning into community.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you are open to the possibilities of what sobriety can offer, without being tied to any particular outcome, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep288 – Blame24 Mar 202501:08:08

Blame serves a purpose when trying to heal from alcoholism as the drinker or the partner. But there are areas where blame does not belong. In this episode, Sheri and Matt break down the impact of blame, and discuss the foundational elements of recovering from the blame of addiction.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep287 – Focus for More Impact with Ayla Fleming17 Mar 202501:02:16

Ayla Fleming is a licensed clinical social worker and telehealth therapist practicing in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and New York. Since specializing in helping individuals, couples, and families recovering from codependency related to addiction, her personal well-being, and that of her clients, is surging. To contact Ayla, please check out her website. And for more on Bowen Family Systems Theory, please click here.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep286 – Identity as a Cause of Addiction10 Mar 202501:11:27

Drinkers often becomes aware of the loss of identity associated with sobriety, but on this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the role of varying categories of identity as a cause of addiction. Sheri reveals her love of smiting people, and Matt explains his eagerness to meet in Topeka at 8am Monday morning.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep285 – Sober Sex in Relationships Roundtable03 Mar 202501:27:33

The recovery community is full of resources about sex after alcohol for singles, but sober sex in relationships is a topic that has been ignored…until now. Nicole, Tess, and Alan are featured on this episode with input from eight people in recovery who have faced a variety of challenges with sex in sobriety.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep348 – Ask Lara for Her BEST Relationship Advice18 May 202601:32:37

Lara Hammock is back for another quarterly segment full of probing questions and thoughtful, helpful, well illustrated advice! Lara is a mental health therapist and the host and producer of The Illustrating Therapist YouTube Channel. She shares her all-time best piece of marriage advice, dispels the myth of a bunch of gaslighting evil geniuses, brings comfort to the idea of overfunctioning, and provides a great visual for communication in a romantic partnership. Most importantly, Lara accepts Matt’s invitation to his rolling birthday ice cream extravaganza.

Please go to UntoxicatedSurvey.org to better understand the impact of alcohol and/or emotional abuse on you and your family. Whether you are the drinker or the partner, whether you feel a lack of emotional safety or don’t really know what that means, we can help you feel supported. Take the survey and learn more about our Echoes of Recovery and SHOUT Sobriety programs. You’ve got this, and we’ve got you.

Ep284 – Sexual Violations in Alcoholic Relationships24 Feb 202501:01:57

Trigger warning: sexual assault and violence

Unconsented sex occurs in relationships impacted by problematic alcohol consumption at a rate 18 times more frequently than in general population relationships. Sheri and Matt discuss this and other tragic statistics, and the implications for partnerships in recovery, as well as for our broader alcohol culture.

If you would like to support the Untoxicated Podcast with an monthly tax deductible $10 donation, please go to SupportUntoxicated.org

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep283 – Kelly on Thriving when the Marriage Does Not Survive17 Feb 2025

It was not her choice. Kelly shared with her husband what she needed from the marriage, and he asked for a divorce. Sometimes boundaries and detachment are not enough for the drinker to seek recovery. But Kelly is working hard on her growth and recovery plan, and she is finding relief and peacefulness in a house free from the pain of addiction.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep282 – Reconnecting after Detachment10 Feb 202501:05:52

Attachment and connection are not the same thing. Detachment in a healthy relationship in recovery from alcoholism is a permanent state. If done with respect, consistency, and emotional safety, choosing times and topics for connection can help a partnership thrive.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

And if you live in the Boston area, please join Sheri and Matt for a slice of pizza on Friday, February 21st at 6pm EST at Papa Ginos at 74 Main Street in Medway, MA 02053.

Ep281 – Live Roundtable from the Bahamas03 Feb 202501:14:15

You can almost hear the turquoise Caribbean waves lapping in the background of this conversation recorded live from the annual Marriagevolution retreat, this year in the Bahamas. Hear how things change over time, both in relationships and in families, as individual recovery progresses for former drinkers and their partners. Listen to Jenn talk about no longer feeling compelled to, “move around the words,” of her husband as he talks to their children. As a bonus, see if you can answer the Bahamian food and culture trivia, and learn a little Bahamian slang.

To join the conversation and be a part of the Marriagevolution for couples in relationship recovery from alcoholism, please click this link.

Ep280 – Moving Beyond Eggshells with Marjorie27 Jan 202501:15:08

Marjorie is certified in trauma and addiction support, and she is a leader in our Echoes of Recovery program. On this episode, she helps Sheri and Matt understand that, “You can’t think your way out of emotions.” She also shares her sacred boundary that, “Kindness is something that I won’t negotiate.” Listen for these and other profound signs of growth, and learn the two meanings of the eggshells referenced in the episode title.

If you would like to learn more about our SHOUT Sobriety program for high functioning alcoholics seeking sobriety, or our Echoes of Recovery program for the loved ones of alcoholics, please join us for a free, no-strings-attached information and Q&A session this Thursday, January 30th at 6pm MST. To request the ZOOM link, please send an email to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com.

And if you live in the Boston area, please join Sheri and Matt for a slice of pizza on Friday, February 21st at 6pm EST at Papa Ginos at 74 Main Street in Medway, MA 02053.

Ep279 – Why Men are Failing20 Jan 202501:13:43

The industrialized world is experiencing an epidemic of men who are unemployed or underemployed, not married or dating, living with their parents, and suffering deaths of despair. And the gender gap in higher education is greater than anyone ever imagined. The experts on the subject point to economic factors for the failure of men, but Sheri and Matt think the experts are missing a critical emotional piece of the puzzle they are trying to solve. Sheri and Matt are both huge, active supporters of the advancement of women, but believe helping men is in the best interest of all humans.

If you would like to learn more about our SHOUT Sobriety program for high functioning alcoholics seeking sobriety, or our Echoes of Recovery program for the loved ones of alcoholics, please join us for a free, no-strings-attached information and Q&A session Thursday, January 30th at 6pm MST. To request the ZOOM link, please send an email to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com.

And if you live in the Boston area, please join us for a slice of pizza on Friday, February 21st at 6pm EST (keep tuning in for more details).

Ep278 – Sex Talk with Nikki13 Jan 202501:16:57

Nikki speaks boldly and vulnerably about a wide variety of taboos sex subject. From sex-drive discrepancy after childbirth to feelings of sexual brokenness to the sloppy disconnected sex of active addiction to arguments that always seemed to come back to sex, Nikki’s experiences have something to which all of us can relate. Listen to Nikki tell the beautiful love story of the epiphany that got her and her husband back on track both emotionally and sexually.

If you would like to learn more about our SHOUT Sobriety program for high functioning alcoholics seeking sobriety, or our Echoes of Recovery program for the loved ones of alcoholics, please join us for a free, no-strings-attached information and Q&A session Thursday, January 30th at 6pm MST. To request the ZOOM link, please send an email to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com.

And if you live in the Boston area, please join us for a slice of pizza on Friday, February 21st at 6pm EST (keep tuning in for more details).

Ep277 – “Freeze” as a Defense Mechanism06 Jan 202500:58:39

Nervous system activation is often described as one of these four reactions: fight, flight, freeze or fawn. Sheri used all four tools to protect herself in her marriage to Matt during and after his active alcoholism. On this episode, the couple talks about how Matt misinterpreted Sheri’s reluctance to engage as a sign that she was waiting for his enlightened epiphanies. They also talk about steaming tomatoes and wind gusts in church.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep276 – Despair and Hopelessness of the Week Between30 Dec 202401:01:21

The week between the holidays carries with it a cascade of emotions for people in a relationship experiencing active addiction or recovery. Sheri and Matt talk about the baggage this one-of-a-kind week used to carry with it, and the relative calm of lasting recovery. They also talk about antiquated payment methods, and a history of New Year’s Eve plans that will have you feeling good about your celebrations.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep275 – Self-Control and Detachment from Family at the Holidays23 Dec 202400:56:02

Is self-control detachment? Sheri and Matt might debate the definitions, but they agree on the value of controlling the controllables around family at the holiday season.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

This Is Why She Doesn’t Trust You14 May 202600:11:11

This is the latest essay from our Untoxicated Blog. To read our hundreds of essays on drinking, emotional safety, and the underlying issues of addiction, please go to SoberAndUnashamed.com. We hope you get a lot out of: “This Is Why She Doesn’t Trust You”

Serving as the facilitator for our Echoes of Recovery group has been the single greatest learning experience of my life. Below are the most important lessons, addressed to people like me. Below the list is how I gained this knowledge.

She loves her kids more than she loves you.

The lying is worse than the drinking.

Broken promises are lies.

The sound of your vehicle pulling into the driveway…

If you are ready to consider the impact of alcohol and a lack of emotional safety, on you and your family, as the drinker or the partner of a drinker, please take our brief survey at UntoxicatedSurvey.org so we can share resources, including a free ebook.

Ep274 – Spiritual Curiosity with David Bird16 Dec 202401:28:35

David Bird is a spiritual explorer with stories to tell about the hopelessness and lack of control of addiction, and the peace and freedom of knowing everything is going to be OK. Through major health scares and a variety of addictive substances, David has been through it all, and maintained humility despite so much interesting growth.

If you are interested in engaging in conversations like this one with other people seeking the self-control of sobriety, please consider joining our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep273 – Is Sex All You Think About?09 Dec 202401:08:20

Do you say or hear this question in your relationship? Sheri and Matt break down how sex drive fluctuates in both a short-term and long-term way, and discuss the impacts of addiction and recovery on the fluctuation. They also talk about navigating the fluctuations with mutual respect.

Sheri and Matt talk about the comment on Matt’s new  blog post, “I Might Be Getting Fired.”

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep272 – No Longer Normalizing with Tess02 Dec 202401:16:10

Tess has experienced a lot of intolerable alcoholic behavior. But like so many of us, Tess was conditioned to accept the unacceptable, and now she is fighting her way back. Tess is an outstanding mother and great storyteller who blesses us with some really relatable and heartbreaking experiences.

If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

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