In this special episode of Therapy Works, we're joined by Dr. Sheila Redfern, a clinical psychologist with 30 years of experience working with young people and their families. Sheila discusses the challenges and intricacies of parenting adolescents, particularly focusing on understanding behaviors through the lens of mentalization. Sheila's new book, 'How Do You Hug a Cactus?' provides practical and insightful guidance on maintaining close relationships with teenagers. Explore how mentalizing can transform parent-teen relationships, the importance of self-reflection for parents, and how to navigate the complexities of a child's inner world. Show Notes: If you found this topic interesting, you’ll love Sheila’s book, “How Do You Huge a Cactus” If you’d like to get in contact with Sheila, you can find out more on her website - https://redfernpsychology.org On the topic of parenting, I’ve been writing some articles about parenting adult children over on my Substack. If this subject interests you, I think you might be interested in these as well - https://juliasamuel.substack.com/p/parenting-adult-children If you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week's episode of the Therapy Works podcast, we sit down with Mimi Kwa, an Australian presenter, broadcaster, and author of 'House of Kwa'. Mimi opens up about her journey through familial challenges, including being sued by her own father in the Supreme Court, dealing with her mother's undiagnosed schizophrenia, and her path to mindfulness. We explore the impact of intergenerational trauma, the process of forgiveness, and her experiences across three different homes. Mimi's story is a testament to resilience and the power of inner healing. Don't miss this profound conversation, rich with insights on culture, family dynamics, and personal growth. Show Notes: You can find Mimi's book, "House of Kwa" here - https://amzn.eu/d/cRyOK3h And you can learn more about her on her website - https://www.mimitv.com.au/ Also, in the Mother/Daughter section, Emily mentions the Forgiveness Project. Check it out here - https://www.theforgivenessproject.com If you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Join us for today's episode where we discuss life after chronic illness recovery. We discuss the emotional and psychological transitions involved, especially in terms of trust in this new change. We'll also discuss practices on how to feel safe in this new stage of life, and how to embody the change. Let us know what you think! If you have dealt with long term illness, and were able to get to a place of recovery, what was that transition like for you? Have you been able to connect with a sense of safety? What has changed for you, in terms of how you process the world and your experience of it? Show Notes: I mentioned Deb Dana’s Glimmers. I write more about them in this week’s newsletter, and the five steps to a Glimmer Practice, so you can really saturate in them more. Check it out here - https://juliasamuel.substack.com/p/developing-your-glimmer-practice Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Susannah Constantine is a former TV fashion guru (one half of the eponymous What Not To Wear duo), TV presenter and author. This conversation is full of therapeutic light bulb moments where Susannah begins to see something familiar in a new way. As you also might expect like anything with Susannah, it’s also full of laughter, wisdom and humanity.  Topics we discuss include: What we inherit from our parents. The difficulty of ‘putting on a show’ and how it blocks you from truly knowing yourself. How fear can hide behind a bravado and that sometimes the fear needs to be anaesthetised because it isn’t faced.  The journey to recovery from alcoholism. The harm that lies do to us personally and how they start to create disconnection with others.  The challenge of talking honestly to our children, wanting to both protect them from ‘our own stuff’ and also protect ourselves from their judgement – but it only builds up the walls between us.  Important links: Susannah’s new book: https://amzn.eu/d/6TVR51Y  Website: https://susannahconstantine.co.uk/  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/susannahconstantine/?hl=en  Support links:  Alcoholics Anonymous: https://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/  Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ A big thank you to Drowsy for sponsoring this episode. If you're in need of the best night's sleep ever, then head to www.drowsysleepco.com and use the code JULIA for a very generous 25% off. A big thank you to Youth & Earth for sponsoring this episode. Head to www.youthandearth.com now and take advantage of a very generous 25% off when using the code JULIA25 on your first order.  Produced by Georgie Rutherford Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Andrew G. Marshall is a well known marital therapist and I sat down with him to discuss the grief he felt following his father’s death. His understandings are rooted in his decades as a therapist and have a particular clarity I think many of you will find helpful. In this episode, we discuss: How the death of a parent in old age is still a big psychological event and brings up many related losses which are often unrecognised.  The power of the unconscious, how we can limit who we are and how we are in the world when we only focus on our conscious lives.  For those with parents who are still alive, this episode is a timely reminder to have those important conversations before they die - don’t pretend they are immortal.  Be patient with friends and family - allow time, space, commit, endure and try again if they are resistant.  The power that rituals hold and how they can help us to move through the pain. Finally how, despite our fear, when we walk towards our pain that is when we can heal. It takes courage, but fear is exhausting and pervasive and this is a route to releasing yourself from it.  I won’t spoil the drama in this episode but suffice to say there are some big surprises - to do with wolves, rituals and tattoos…!  Support links: Grief Works app: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 Grief Works book: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/books/grief-works Feel The Fear and Do it Anyway book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Feel-Fear-Anyway-Indecision-Confidence/dp/0091907071 Find Andrew G. Marshall: Website: https://andrewgmarshall.com/ Podcast: https://andrewgmarshall.com/podcasts/ Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ A big thank you to Youth & Earth for sponsoring this episode. Head to www.youthandearth.com now and take advantage of a very generous 25% off when using the code JULIA25 on your first order.  Produced by Georgie Rutherford Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

*Trigger warning - includes references to racial abuse that some listeners might find distressing* This is a fast moving energetic conversation which will at times stop you in your tracks. Trisha Goddard is an extraordinarily successful actress and television presenter. In this deep and emotionally revealing interview, Trisha takes us on a ride with courage and honesty. You will discover how she overcame enormous adversity and how she has finally found love and happiness at the age of 65 years old.  There is so much you will relate to. We discuss: How an intelligent woman who has tremendous insight and instinct professionally can be blind to red flags in her personal relationships due to early attachment issues.  The racist abuse she experienced, which is both internalised and normalised in much of her life.  How the political and social movement, Black Lives Matter, transformed Trisha’s own understanding of racism. How formative her schooling was. Education, reading books, and a couple of excellent teachers was her salvation.  The emotional cost of the breakdown of her 20 year marriage. How her relationship with her two daughters after years of complexity evolved to be one of healing and closeness. They discovered the power of honesty, that the truth, as hard as it is, is curative.  And finally the heart-warming story of how she found love and her list of 20 questions she asked him before she agreed to date him. What would your 20 questions be? Important links:  Ten critical questions before embarking on a relationship: https://www.exeter.ac.uk/news/research/title_672700_en.html Therapist Uncensored Podcast referred to by Sophie in episode; https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/therapist-uncensored-podcast/id1146941306?i=1000593377798  Explanation of Dialectical behaviour therapy: https://www.verywellmind.com/dialectical-behavior-therapy-1067402  Black Lives Matter UK: https://blacklivesmatter.uk/ Find Trisha: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therealtrishagoddard/?hl=en Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ A big thank you to Youth & Earth for sponsoring this episode. Head to www.youthandearth.com now and take advantage of a very generous 25% off when using the code JULIA25 on your first order.  Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is an episode you need to listen to if you want to understand the experience of suffering mental illness. Yvette, as one of our unheard voices describes with stigma blowing clarity what it is like to live with mental illness. She suffers from bipolar disorder, depression and binge eating.  The first thing you will realise is that suffering from a mental illness is very different from having difficult feelings. It is a serious, life changing and often misunderstood condition that can be managed but takes a huge effort to do so.  In this conversation, we touch on:  The mood swings of bipolar disorder, how seriously unwell it can lead someone to be and the scary nature of a manic episode. The way bipolar and binge eating influence each other. Yvette goes into detail about eating all her strong feelings - and how she expresses her anger.  On how depression ‘tells you lies’. If you have suffered depression, or are close to someone with depression you will find Yvette’s description of depression illuminating.  How being a young person entering a mental health unit can be thought of as shameful but how Yvette felt there was a fellowship and it was an important space outside of home that was curative.  How ’suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem’. This is truly something to hold onto and we should use to influence ourselves and the other. Her story gives us all hope when life gets terrifyingly dark. Finally how choirs should be an NHS prescription and how curative singing can be to lift spirits and connect with others. Yvette’s wisdom from facing such huge challenges comes from a deep knowing. She acknowledges that you don’t have to fix everything at once but just focus on one day at time. If you are suffering from similar feelings, just remember feelings are not permanent and you won’t feel like this forever.  Support links: BEAT: https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/ MIND: https://www.mind.org.uk/ Rethink Mental Illness: https://www.rethink.org/ Bipolar UK: https://www.bipolaruk.org/ Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapy works and get on your way to being your best self. A big thank you to Youth & Earth for sponsoring this episode. Head to www.youthandearth.com now and take advantage of a very generous 25% off when using the code JULIA25 on your first order.  Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There is so much to tell you about this fantastic conversation with Bryony Gordon. You will love it. I was gripped by her. She is a headlining journalist, with a column and features with notable public figures. She has written many brilliant books charting her life and in the process showing us what it is to be diagnosed with OCD, depression and addiction.  We discussed a feast of topics including: The pressure of expectations. We are expected to live happily ever after, and that in itself can set us up for failure. We looked at an alternative view of expectations during our conversation.  The irony that successful people are often troubled, and how the push to succeed often means shrinking one’s true self. (I warned you we got deep!) We discussed how our childhood’s shape us, but that is not the end of the story, and nor is blaming. With the right tools and attitude we really can change our response to our childhood and vitally the way we parent.  How hard it is to feel like you belong, how vital it is and how we can find our tribe in unexpected places.  The madness of trying to have control, and the peace that surrender brings in so many aspects of life, addiction being one. The idea of perseverance is powerful. You fall, you get up you go again. It is in effect the definition of resilience, and acknowledges that piece we often forget, we all fall but it's the getting up and going again that’s difficult and vital.  And finally how baffling life is but we can find strength in knowing ourselves, and having the courage to turn to ourselves with kindness.  There are so many layers to this conversation and I’m sure everyone will take away something valuable from this conversation. I’d love to hear your thoughts so please message me on instagram @juliasamuel or email therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com.  Support links: OCD Action: https://ocdaction.org.uk/ Mental Health Mates: https://www.mentalhealthmates.co.uk/ Heads Together: https://www.headstogether.org.uk/ Beat: https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/ Find Bryony: Column: https://www.telegraph.co.uk/authors/b/bp-bt/bryony-gordon/ Books: https://www.waterstones.com/author/bryony-gordon/55496 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bryonygordon/?hl=en Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this profoundly moving episode, Suzanne opens up about all the challenges that surrounded her mother’s death during Covid-19. Covid was an incredibly difficult time for all of us but the greatest challenge had to be the heightened complexity of a Covid death. Many of you will resonate with Suzanne’s moving story and the psychological difficulties the Covid restrictions imposed on all of us. In this episode, we discuss:  The heightened complexity of a Covid death and the mental toll caused by the restrictions. How we grieve for the future as well as the past. When anger contaminates all your feelings, you should turn to a 4 step tool to help you release it. Why it’s never too late to have rituals when someone has died - nor is it ever too late to mourn. Grief is held in the body and often feels like fear.  While we internally acknowledge that we are mortal, we never acknowledge that we will all be bereaved at some point in our lives. Support links:  Cruse Bereavement Support: https://www.cruse.org.uk/ Grief Works App: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 Grief Works Book: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/books/grief-works Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dr. Rangan Chatterjee is a medical doctor who has translated his learnings from decades of experience as a GP into 5 best-selling books and his No 1 Health podcast Live Better Live More. I am a huge fan of Rangan and was lucky enough to be a guest on his podcast and can now call him a much-respected friend.  This wonderful conversation takes us into the personal process of Rangan the man whose biggest achievement is his unique journey which has now led him to pursue a more joyful and vibrant life.  You will find many ideas and concepts in this conversation that will expand your awareness of how you engage with your life, and with it, the possibility of positive change. In this conversation, we discussed:  The burden and intensity of being a carer in the family How authenticity and the intention with which we respond to events – by duty or genuine choice - has a huge impact on our emotional cost.  How a desire to be the best can influence us and how being the child of immigrants who experienced racism informs our response and the need to perform.  The radical concept of conflict as an opportunity to grow; to explore what is really going on and learn more about oneself. The foundation of which is trusting that we are innately enough.  What triggers us as humans and how we react in the moment. Why do we take offence or choose not to take offence? Support links: Carers UK: https://www.carersuk.org/ MIND UK: https://www.mind.org.uk/ Find more information on Dr Rangan Chatterjee: Website: https://drchatterjee.com/ Podcast: https://drchatterjee.com/blog/category/podcast/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drchatterjee/ Find Julia: Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ This episode is sponsored by by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapy works and get on your way to being your best self. Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today’s special reflection episode, we discuss our experience of working together as family and as therapists. As in all things therapeutic it is important to reflect on what we’ve done - good and bad so we can continue to learn and grow for the next season.  We discuss: The importance of stories and having a narrative in therapy.  Why like therapy, it is a mutual benefit because we’ve gained and learned a lot from our guests.  How we’ve been so blown away by our guests who have allowed us to have these private even intimate and therapeutic conversations in public.  We explored the concept of self compassion as a resource to turn to when we are suffering as opposed self criticism which came through every episode. As Emily said ‘Don’t beat on yourself when life is beating you.’  How much we value the relationship with our listeners and how thrilled we are that you are building a relationship with us.  We are so grateful to you for listening and hope you will all join us for season 2 launching in January!  Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Christmas can be tricky even when we aren’t facing a particular challenge. And it can be extra hard when you’re grieving or going through other personal difficulties.  In today’s episode, the three of us discuss: Acknowledging that Christmas is always intensified as there’s always pressure to have to a perfect time.  Why we all need to be realistic and recognise that not everyone is going to be happy all the time and that’s ok. It’s important to take the pressure off. Children have more feelings - tantrums as well as joy and why you should ride the waves of emotion.  Allowing for difference - if you have new family members or friends joining you for Christmas then allow each person to introduce their own Christmas tradition.  Why Christmas can be challenging in blended families and why great communication and clear planning can help. Grief at Christmas can be very hard - we discuss ideas to help support you through it. Tips on what to do if you’re spending Christmas alone  We hope that whatever you might be doing this Christmas, that it’s as happy as it can be and that you all have a brilliant end to 2022! Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Because her edict was to find that pocketful of happiness in each day. Feeling no guilt seems an incredibly generous and welcome gift to have been unexpectedly given by her." Richard E. Grant is an actor, author and director who has appeared in over 80 films and television programs, such as Withnail And I, Star Wars and was previously Oscar nominated for his supporting role in Can you Ever Forgive me?. His beloved wife Joan died in September 2021 after a battle with lung cancer and in September 2022 he released a memoir called A Pocketful of Happiness mostly written in the last year of his wife’s life.  In this episode we discuss: How grief is influenced by the circumstances of death and how not having regrets is an important factor that makes the difference between a good and bad death.  Recognising that the process of grief is an oscillation between loss orientation and restoration orientation. Why it’s important we update our understanding of grief, it isn’t about forgetting and moving on but remembering and connecting, sometimes with the pain.  How the love for the person who you’ve lost never dies. Why you can experience guilt in grief and allowing yourself a pocketful of happiness can protect you against guilt.  We discuss how men and women grieve differently, and explore the possibility of new relationships after a partner has died.  We discuss the parent/child relationship, touching on boundaries, connection and what might be ok and not ok to share.  How much of life is down to luck and the power of our attitude in our outcome; when we manifest and believe in ourselves and see the negative as a challenge to be overcome rather than something that defeats us.  How important it is for friends to support us in pre-bereavement, when we are bereaved and how distressed one becomes when close friends don't show up.  Find more information on Richard:  Website: https://www.richard-e-grant.com/ Instagram: @richard.e.grant Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Pocketful-Happiness-Richard-Grant/dp/1398519472  Support Links: Cruse Bereavement Support: https://www.cruse.org.uk/ Good Grief Festival: https://goodgrieffest.com/ Grief Works app: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 Join a mission to transform one million lives and become a money coach: https://octopusmoneycoach.com/become-a-financial-coach A big thank you to our sponsor, Athletic Greens. Athletic Greens is offering Therapy Works listeners a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com/therapyworks. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, we are honored to have Christiana Figueres, an internationally recognized leader on climate change and former executive secretary of the UNFCCC. Christiana shares her insights on the importance of balancing awareness of climate challenges with a sense of agency and optimism. We discuss her personal journey, the impact of impermanence on her life, and how love and courage can drive effective climate action. In the Mother/Daughter section, we explore our own experiences and discuss practical steps and emotional strategies for engaging with climate issues in a meaningful way. Resources: For starters, find out more about Christiana Figueres over on her website - http://christianafigueres.com/ You can find her podcast, Outrage and Optimism here - https://www.outrageandoptimism.org/episodes And her book, The Future We Choose, is available here - https://www.globaloptimism.com/the-future-we-choose In the Mother/Daughter part of this episode, Sophie shares how she’s going to be writing a series of newsletters on Substack about how to talk about the Climate Crisis with your children.  It’s aimed to be released in September.  Until then, you can find our newsletter here - https://substack.com/@juliasamuel Christiana was very inspired by Plum Village and Thich Nhat Hanh.  You can find out more about their message here - https://plumvillage.uk Here’s the episode Sophie mentioned with Krista Tippett and Christiana Figueres - https://onbeing.org/programs/christiana-figueres-ecological-hope-and-spiritual-evolution/ And here’s the other episode she mentioned from Therapist Uncensored - https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/therapist-uncensored-podcast/id1146941306?i=1000626570204 Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Claire’s son Chris was 13 when he was accidentally hit by a car on his way home from school which left him quadriplegic and unable to speak. This is a story that is both hard to hear, because we prefer to keep the reality of these devastating events out of mind, but also inspirational. Despite this tragic accident, Claire shows how it’s changed her perspective on life and taught her to appreciate what really matters. In this episode we discuss:  The importance of communication, of not struggling alone. It’s vital to allow yourself to feel and ask for help. People don’t know what you need unless you tell them. Why love is the strongest medicine. Claire’s love for Chris and the love she shares with her husband enabled them to build resilience personally and collectively as a family. The recognition that hate is a heavy contaminating burden to carry and how voicing her anger and resentment releases this. How we have the power to choose the attitude we take, despite being powerless in what happens to us.  A severe life changing injury to someone in our family is devastating. It is a painful road to come to terms with such a massive loss. Whilst allowing the feelings we have in the present, it is helpful to acknowledge that feelings change, what we feel now doesn’t predict how we will feel in the future.  How there are often other casualties in a family when tragedy strikes.  The assumptions we make about disability and what life could be like can be turned on their head. We learn that Chris has a meaningful, important and worthwhile life despite his profound disabilities.  Why faith can keep us grounded and that looking towards a higher power for answers can give us strength and meaning.  How we can find strength despite enormous loss and how we will never know how strong we are until we are forced to discover it.  Child Brain Injury Support links: https://childbraininjurytrust.org.uk/ Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe If you'd like to get in touch with the Therapy Works team, please contact us on therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com. A big thank you to our sponsor, BetterHelp. If you’re thinking of giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It’s not only convenient and can be done from the comfort of your own home, but it’s also affordable. All you have to do is fill out a quick survey and you’ll be matched with a therapist!  Visit betterhelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“The shortest distance between two people is laughter" My next guest is award-winning actress, Helena Bonham Carter. She is a total original, funny and wise, thoughtful, irreverent and utterly herself. In this joyous, meaningful and wide ranging conversation which had moments of great humour it was Helena’s inspirational wisdom that ran through it most profoundly. In this conversation, we discussed: The big dilemma we all face in finding our purpose and the complexity of what makes us human How Helena won’t let difficult events defeat her but she “will make music of what remains” How we are all a multiplicity of beings and why it helps us to choose life and joy and not take ourselves too seriously The painful consequences of divorce, what helps and how it takes proper time to process these big life changing events  The wisdom of the Victorians to wear black at painful times to honour the loss and let the world know “I am not my normal self”  How singing can be a marvellous antidote to self criticism and shame Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe If you'd like to get in touch with the Therapy Works team, please contact us on therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com. A big thank you to our sponsor, BetterHelp. If you’re thinking of giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It’s not only convenient and can be done from the comfort of your own home, but it’s also affordable. All you have to do is fill out a quick survey and you’ll be matched with a therapist!  Visit betterhelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“Until you’ve been there, you don’t know what war is." Yeva Skalietska is an unusual guest for this podcast, being a 12 year old school girl - but she has already had to experience many things that no child ever should. At a time when there may be Ukraine fatigue, this is a conversation that we all need to hear.  On this podcast you will hear how each therapy session has its own character, and this is an example of me not being my best self. I was uneasy and tried too hard which meant our connection was not optimum. However, above all you will takeaway:  How important it is to be grateful for the things in life we take for granted. How hard it is for so many of us to picture the real horror of war.  The curative power of journalling that both enables us to process terrible experiences and support ourselves to have a clear narrative of what seems chaotic.  How one person can change the course of our life by making the right decisions for the right reasons. How we are at the mercy of forces beyond us, both good and bad.  How faith and the belief in God can be sustaining and give us hope when our world is being destroyed.  The difficulty of the meaning and word refugee, which can be imbued with shame and objectification.  The power and vital importance of the place we call home which we may take for granted.  Yeva’s Book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/You-Dont-Know-What-War/dp/152665993X  Refugee Support: Red Cross: https://www.redcross.org.uk/get-help/get-help-as-a-refugee/help-for-refugees-from-ukraine#Emotional%20support Refugee Council: https://www.refugeecouncil.org.uk/our-work/mental-health-support-for-refugees-and-asylum-seekers/ Donate to support Ukrainian Refugees: https://www.actionaid.org.uk/changelives/rg/donate-to-help-refugees?gclid=Cj0KCQiAyracBhDoARIsACGFcS522gzkWUKhEvUmDMghlyBSgwUkDhWtr7_5fZ79dYkUxadGACT475IaArAKEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds  Join a mission to transform one million lives and become a money coach: https://octopusmoneycoach.com/become-a-financial-coach A big thank you to our sponsor, Athletic Greens. Athletic Greens is offering Therapy Works listeners a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com/therapyworks. --- Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

*Trigger warning - this episode may make references to depression, drugs and suicide.* “I was dealing on and off with very bad depression, which I think in the early days leading up to my breakdown, I dealt with through drink and then I dealt with through this obsessive need and desire not to drink, which I probably replaced with an obsessive need and desire to work all the time.” We learn most from hearing the truthful stories of others. We learn even more about what it is to be human when we get beneath someone's external performative self and learn what they actually feel on the inside. Alastair Campbell is a remarkable example of someone who has been powerful at the heart of the political world as the former Director of Communications and Strategy at 10 Downing Street and also owned and expressed his inner mental health challenges.  In this remarkably open and illuminating episode you will learn: The confusion between mental and physical illness. Because mental illness is invisible, unlike physical illness we find it harder to legitimise our mental states. How mental health isn’t separate from the system and society within which we live. The link between depression and addiction, and how it can be inherited. Why a breakdown can be incredibly painful, it might be the route to a break through and will allow you to develop better coping mechanisms for life’s difficulties.  Why it’s incredibly painful to witness our adult children suffer and being powerless to help. The dilemma and boundary we face between self-care and selfishness.  The wonderful illustration of the jam jar which triggered my Freudian slip and includes tools for wellbeing that holds back malevolent depression. The dilemma and boundary between self-care and selfishness.  Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe If you'd like to get in touch with the podcast team, please contact us on therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com. A big thank you to our sponsor, BetterHelp. If you’re thinking of giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It’s not only convenient and can be done from the comfort of your own home, but it’s also affordable. All you have to do is fill out a quick survey and you’ll be matched with a therapist!  Visit betterhelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

*Trigger warning* - This episode includes references to suicide and physical abuse. "I grew up around men that, you know, kind of spoke with the hands and not with the mouth." In this incredibly powerful and moving conversation, David reflects on hitting rock bottom and finding hope in the darkest of times. Topics discussed in this episode include:  How he overcame a violent childhood when one’s parent used aggression rather than words How hard it can be to be an authentic sensitive man when surrounded by toxic masculinity The idea that the cards we are dealt when we are born is down to luck but how we play them is shaped by our choices and decisions. Why the question is not why the addiction - the question is what is the source of the pain it is anaesthetising? Why we are constantly on the hunt for more and don’t know what we have to be grateful for until it’s taken away. — Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe Grief Works app: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 If you are in need of support please visit:  https://switchback.org.uk/ - London based prison rehabilitation charity  https://www.hardmantrust.org.uk/directory/ - finds support services for prisoners A big thank you to our sponsor, Athletic Greens. Athletic Greens is offering Therapy Works listeners a FREE 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit athleticgreens.com/therapyworks. --- Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"Would they prefer a gay son or a dead son was genuinely a question that went through my mind more than once a day." In this week's episode, I am speaking to the wonderful Mohsin Zaidi about the importance of belonging and the bitter struggle he encountered with his identity. We explore: The tension that arises when our core identities are different from what we believe they should be Why courage is something we must grow and it may take years to find the courage to be true to oneself How expanding our external world expands our internal world and may enable ourselves to inhabit ourselves more fully How secrets and lies can poison and destroy you When you despair, it's important to remember to be patient and to not put too much pressure on oneself Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe Read Mohsin's book here: https://www.mohsinzaidi.com/ Important Support: Stonewall - Support for LGBTQ+: https://www.stonewall.org.uk/ Mermaids - Helping gender diverse kids and their families: https://mermaidsuk.org.uk/ It Gets Better - A project to uplift and empower LGBTQ communities: https://itgetsbetter.org/ If you'd like to get in touch with the podcast team, please contact us on therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com. A big thank you to our sponsor, BetterHelp. If you’re thinking of giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It’s not only convenient and can be done from the comfort of your own home, but it’s also affordable. All you have to do is fill out a quick survey and you’ll be matched with a therapist!  Visit betterhelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. If you'd like to be unknown voice on Season 2, please send in a one minute video about a challenge you've faced to jsamuelpod@gmail.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“I know a few women, even in my circle, have survived sexual trauma. And they all go back to the same thing and they talk about the moment where they changed. It's not to do with what somebody did to them physically is to do with they they know when they when their sense of self shattered.”  Today's episode is both heartbreaking and heartwarming. I am joined by single mother, Jess, who opens up about her own turbulent childhood. This therapy session definitely brought up a lot of different issues surrounding family, the complexities of motherhood and the scarring impact of sexual abuse. In this episode we discuss issues around:  The impact of our parents choices on our mental health The devastating life shattering impact of sexual abuse and how the focus culturally has been the physical event but it can come in many forms How sexual abuse isn't always physical and can be subtle and can be harder to recognise The joy and complexity of having a baby and how it inevitably brings up our own issues The importance of community and how there are many diverse ways people can make a family Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe Important links: Support for people who are estranged: https://www.standalone.org.uk/ Support for sexual abuse victims: https://safeline.org.uk/ --- If you are an unheard voice and want to share your story, please email jsamuelpod@gmail.com. Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“I feel like I always kind of longed for that family set up and I've got it. But although I feel loved and and I love my family, I've also kind of fallen into being a stepmum where I also sometimes feel that it's not my family.” In this moving and revealing conversation Kate Ferdinand opens up on subjects that affect us all. This conversation explores:  • How her childhood shaped her and in particular her relationship with her father • The complexities and joys of being a stepmother and we can have multiple loves all at the same time • How love for those that have died lives on in the family, becomes part of the family and needs to be integrated by those joining them • The difficulties of social media and why comparison is the direct route to misery • Her own experience of miscarriage and why she needed to be open about it  • How she has had to learn that expressing difficult feelings can release her from old, hardwired patterns • The notion that love is the strongest medicine — Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe Grief Works app: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 If you'd like to get in touch with the podcast team, please contact us on therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com. If you are in need of bereavement support please visit Cruse: https://www.cruse.org.uk/ A big thank you to our sponsor, BetterHelp. If you’re thinking of giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It’s not only convenient and can be done from the comfort of your own home, but it’s also affordable. All you have to do is fill out a quick survey and you’ll be matched with a therapist!  Visit betterhelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

(Trigger warning: this episode contains mentions of illness and includes references to bereavement) “A bomb hit us and yeah. I can't even remember really stuff before that, that was then and and this is now and that was a real turning point in our in our lives.”  In this searingly honest episode Geraint explores how to ‘carry on’ being a dad, a business owner and manage the day to day whilst Debbie, his beloved wife, is in hospital with stage 4 cancer.  We discuss the searingly difficult topics of: That seismic moment when your life changes forever The hard part of wanting to protect your children but learning how to have difficult conversations Knowing how to implement good coping strategies but learning how to admit to feeling helpless Learning how to appreciate the happy times despite the difficulties and how to survive when in the middle of a roller coaster life crisis Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe Grief Works app: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/grief-works-self-care-love/id1558867513 Important links: If you are in need of bereavement support please visit Cruse: https://www.cruse.org.uk/ Please visit Child Bereavement UK if your children are in need of support: https://www.childbereavementuk.or --- Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

“Life is an oscillation between being very hard and very good.” In this first ever episode of Therapy Works, Julia Samuel is joined by Minnie Driver who touches on some fundamental challenges we all face in life and gives a fascinating insight in how to manage them. In this conversation we explore:  What we inherit from our parents and how that can impact our choices and outcomes How we can learn to live with our wounds but can never erase them How the loss of Minnie’s beloved mother has changed her outlook towards life The crucial importance of hope and how that tiny flicker of light that can help us survive when we feel we can’t Julia’s Website: https://juliasamuel.co.uk/ Julia’s Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe A big thank you to our sponsor, BetterHelp. If you’re thinking of giving therapy a try, BetterHelp is a great option. It’s not only convenient and can be done from the comfort of your own home, but it’s also affordable. All you have to do is fill out a quick survey and you’ll be matched with a therapist!  Visit betterhelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. If you'd like to get in touch with the podcast team, please contact us on therapyworkspodcast@gmail.com. Produced by Georgie Rutherford Edited by Nick Kingswell Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of the Therapy Works podcast, I speak to Kate Silverton, a renowned broadcaster turned child therapist. We delve into a deeply personal and intimate conversation about navigating public and personal lives, overcoming complex childhood traumas, and the transformative power of therapy. Kate shares her journey from experiencing severe trauma in childhood to finding peace and healing through therapy. She discusses the challenges and triumphs of her career, her significant relationships, and her mission to break the cycle of trauma for future generations through her work with children and her books. We also explore the importance of self-soothing, emotional regulation, and the impact of healthy relationships. Show Notes: Find out more about Kate Silverton and her work over on her website - https://www.katesilverton.com And find her on Instagram here - https://www.instagram.com/katesilverton Find her books: https://linktr.ee/theresnosuchthingasnaughtybook Here’s the podcast Em mentioned - https://drchatterjee.com/how-our-childhood-shapes-every-aspect-of-our-health-with-dr-gabor-mate/ And here’s the Therapy uncensored podcast Sophie talked about - https://open.spotify.com/show/2Cv0V85tssliSL8wz7gVWm Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This is Therapy Works: the podcast where Julia Samuel helps her guests confront life's biggest challenges. Launching on Wednesday 19th October 2022. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week's Agony Aunties episode, we address a heartfelt question from a viewer struggling with divorce grief five years after the fact. The viewer shares their deep regret after leaving their son's father for someone they now realize was not right for them. This decision has brought financial difficulties and emotional pain for themselves, their son, and their. Despite wishing they could turn back time to make different choices, they're seeking advice on how to cope with their current situation. Tune in for a compassionate discussion on navigating the tumultuous emotions of regret and finding a path forward. We’re going to talk about self-compassion, and about acknowledging that our choices were the best ones we could make at the time.  At least, that’s what’s alive in us as we’re discussing this question.  What do you think?  How does this question resonate with you?  Do you think about any decisions that you regret making? Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s episode of Therapy Works, we’re speaking with Becky Excell, a gluten free influencer, as she opens up about her eating disorder, how it impacted her friends and family, and what it took to finally get her to change.  We’ll discuss how some approaches of help actually caused more harm, how the expected norms of university life can lead to challenges, and how Becky has found a path forward that helps people who also have challenges with food, even though it’s coming at a new cost.   When we get to the Mother/Daughter section of the episode, we’ll talk about how we as a family experienced eating disorders as well, and what helped us tremendously during this time.  We mentioned that we’ll be sharing resources in the show notes, so if you’re at all interested, do check out: Beat Eating Disorders - https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk SWEDA - https://swedauk.org The Maudsley Model - https://www.eatingdisorderhope.com/treatment-for-eating-disorders/therapies/maudsley-method Young Minds - https://www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-a-z-mental-health-guide/eating-disorders/ And here’s the book Emily talked about - https://amzn.eu/d/00gVlWXz Along with a list of other books you might find useful - https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/about-eating-disorders/downloads-resources/helpful-books/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's Agony Aunties episode, we explore a recurring theme in relationships where one often feels they give more than they receive. We’ll delve into the emotional pain that stems from a consistent sense of not being seen and receiving less than what one asks for. We’ll also look into whether this pattern might be rooted in past experiences and how to address these deep-seated feelings by examining our subconscious mind. Let us know what you think!  Have you noticed any recurring patterns in your relationships?  And if you have a question you’d like us to cover for Agony Aunties, we’d be happy to hear them. Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s episode of Therapy Works, we’re speaking Esther Stamp, whose husband Darren was falsely accused of inappropriately touching a student, and who has been found not guilty in a court of law. Esther shares her story about the whole process, what happened to her and her family and children. She shares a story about the beautiful power of a caring community in such a touching way, and talks about the support of a community coming together for someone in need of help. She’ll also talk about the trial process for Darren, and what life is like now afterwards, and how - sadly - there’s still a lot to go before the dust settles. I fund Esther’s story very moving. How did you feel hearing it? What are your thoughts? Do let me know in the comments below. Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s Agony Aunties, we’re talking about how to relate to our inner Shitty Committee, when we have some thoughts in us that are self-critical, or just not in alignment with our values.  While the question didn’t necessarily ask about how to relate to the Committee, but asked more about how to silence them, we’re talking about a different way to approach these thoughts, with some more curiosity, some more acceptance, with viewing them as part of our Internal Family System. If you have a different way that you relate with your inner thoughts, please do share!  And if you have a question you’d like us to cover for Agony Aunties, we’d be happy to hear them. Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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In this week's episode of Agony Aunties, we're addressing a listener's heartfelt question about re-grieving her father's death after hearing news about the contaminated blood inquiry, which her father received and passed away from. We'll explore the psychological impact of triggers, the importance of expressing anger, how when we pay attention to something we find it popping up more often in our lives, and ways to take care of oneself while processing deeply personal and painful experiences. Join us as we navigate the complexities of grief, trauma, and finding a path forward. P.S. In these answers we are sharing what’s top of mind for us. We would love to keep the conversation going. Have you had any experiences similar to what Emily mentioned, where what you’re thinking about a lot lately you happen to see around you more often? Do share! And if you have any questions you’d like us to tackle for the next Agony Aunties, do share! Resources If you’re dealing with grief, I created a program that I really put a lot of effort into, and one that I think really can help. Hopefully, you find it useful - https://illumeapps.com/griefworks/ Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It seems like the world is falling apart, and we’re destroying the climate. Is it responsible for us to still have children? For this week’s Agony Aunties,, we take on this question from a listener inspired by our podcast with Christiana Figueiras. We’ll dive into this existential dilemma, exploring the balance between the responsibilities and joys of parenthood versus the potential environmental impact and uncertain future. We’ll discuss the importance of acknowledging the real fear and anxiety the younger generation feels, the need for a mindset shift towards abundance and creativity, and the significance of making decisions from a place of security rather than fear. The conversation also touches on broadening the concept of family and considering various ways of being a parent. At least, these are our thoughts. How does this resonate with you? How do you feel about bringing children into this world? This seems to be a question that people regularly ask, and were asked after the great wars as well. And so, if now’s not the time to have children, then when? If you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We're starting off Season 6 of Therapy Works with a wonderful talk with Jake Humphrey. Join us as we explore Jake's varied career as a sports presenter, businessman, and podcaster. Through this enriching conversation, Jake shares insights on balancing success with personal life, family values, and his mental health journey. We dive into the beauty of ordinary life, the importance of vulnerability, and finding joy in simple moments. Discover how sharing our deepest fears can lead to healing and connection, and learn from Jake's experiences of resilience amidst life's pressures. Resources If you found this conversation interesting, you can find Jake Humphrey’s work in many places, including: Twitter/X - https://x.com/mrjakehumphrey High Performance Podcast - https://podfollow.com/highperformance Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jakehumphrey/ Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, we’re addressing a listener's question about the fear of their child, particularly during the teenage years.  We’ll discuss the power dynamics between parents and children, the emotional challenges of parenting, and strategies for maintaining calm and establishing boundaries. We’ll also dig into how personal childhood experiences can influence parental fears, as well as the importance of repair and trust in parent-child relationships.  Tune in for an insightful discussion on the complexities of parenting and overcoming fear. As well, we’re only sharing what’s top of mind for us in these answers, and we’d love to keep the conversation going.  Do you have any frameworks you use, perhaps similar to Sophie’s, in how you show up for your children?  I’d love to know.  And if you have any questions you’d like us to tackle for the next Agony Aunties, do share! Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s bonus episode of the Therapy Works Podcast, we’re featuring psychotherapist and founder of Brown Girl Therapy, Sahaj Kaur Kohli. In this episode, Sahaj delves into her journey as a daughter of Indian immigrants in the United States, her professional and personal challenges, and the cultural straddling that influences her work with clients. She shares insights on navigating mental health, identity, and transgenerational trauma while discussing her new book, 'But What Will People Say?' and the importance of healing through cultural sensitivity and curiosity. Discover how Sahaj blends her bicultural experience in her therapeutic practice and offers invaluable advice for children of immigrants and their families. Dive into the conversation and explore Sahaj's story and expertise, filled with relatable experiences and professional wisdom Resources You can learn more about Sahaj Kaur Kohli, and get her book, on her website - https://sahajkaurkohli.com/book For those of you on Instagram, check out her profile over at - https://www.instagram.com/browngirltherapy/ Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's episode of Agony Aunties, we're addressing a listener's question about not feeling anything. We'll discuss the potential link between numbness and depression, recommend ways to explore and understand this emotional state, and emphasize the importance of professional help. We'll also talk about holistic lifestyle changes and the value of communicating your feelings to those close to you. Resources: I mentioned that I’ll be sharing an online test, for those of you who are interested in their emotional wellbeing.  You can find it here - https://checkwellbeing.leadershipacademy.nhs.uk/ Otherwise, if you have any questions, send me a message on my Instagram - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ For more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this very engaging conversation, Jonathan Haidt, Professor of Ethical Leadership at the Stern School in New York, discusses his latest book “The Anxious Generation” where he goes into the significant impact digital devices and social media have on the younger generation, particularly the broader implications of technology on children's development, mental health, and social interactions. Highlighting four foundational rules for healthier childhoods, Haidt emphasizes the urgent need for collective action among parents, schools, and governments to mitigate the adverse effects of a digital upbringing and restore a play-based, real-world childhood that fosters resilience and social competence. Resources: For starters, you’re going to love “The Anxious Generation” - https://www.anxiousgeneration.com If you’re interested in taking action, we mentioned a few websites you can check out, namely:  http://letgrow.org http://anxiousgeneration.com http://smartphonefreechildhood.co.uk http://delaysmartphones.org Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s Agony Aunties, we address a listener's concern about feeling numb after the recent death of their mother. We’ll talk about the stereotypes of what people think grief looks like, and then address the shock and emotional numbness that often follows sudden loss, along with the adaptation process during mourning, and when it might be necessary to seek professional help. We’ll also talk about the importance of proper support systems, the timing of therapeutic interventions, and accessible resources for those dealing with grief. Resources: I’ve created an app to help people navigate Grief, called Grief Works. I think it can be very useful in helping work through grief and its many stages. Please find a link to download it here - https://illumeapps.com/griefworks/ Please follow me on Instagram - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ For more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

While we’re preparing for Season 6 of Therapy Works, we have a special expert episode we wanted to share between Emily and Satya Doyle Byock, a psychotherapist from Portland and author of the book 'Quarter Life: The Search for Self in Early Adulthood.” Satya explains the concept of the 'quarter life' phase, identifying it as the first stage of adulthood between adolescence and midlife, and discusses the unique challenges faced during this period. She shares her motivation for writing the book, rooted in her personal struggles and professional experiences, which I’m sure many of us can relate to as well. The conversation delves into the societal expectations, psychological development, and family dynamics that impact individuals in their twenties and thirties, and also discusses how we usually talk about this stage of life, which - oftentime - isn’t met with a lot of compassion or patience. Emily and Satya also discuss the importance of ritual, and the role of therapy in navigating this critical life stage, and the importance of understanding and supporting this majorly transformative phase of our lives. 00:00 Welcome and Introduction to Doyle Byock and His Book on Quarter Life 00:39 Defining Quarter Life and Its Importance 01:26 The Struggles of Quarter Lifers and the Lack of Societal Language 03:20 Generational Perspectives and Misunderstandings 05:05 The Four Pillars of Growth in Quarter Life 12:05 The Meaning vs. Stability Framework 20:03 The Role of Parents and Society in Navigating Quarter Life 24:21 The Power of Therapy and Self-Exploration 26:39 Closing Thoughts and the Impact of Supporting Quarter Lifers Resources: If this conversation resonated with you, and you’d like to find ways to understand the quarter-life experience from a different angle, check out Satya’s book “Quarter Life: The Search for Self in Early Adulthood” - https://satyabyock.com  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, a listener is asking us for healthy ways to move forward after the early death of a brother, who died from addiction, and whose death caused major challenges for the entire family. Let’s begin by saying that there are no quick and easy ways to answer this in a video. This is a profound, life changing challenge, and we really encourage seeking individual therapy, and to explore how the addiction impacted everyone’s relationships, as well as discussing these difficult topics with children to help them understand and process their feelings. We’d also like to emphasise self-compassion here, to cope with shame and self-judgment, as there is a major stigma around dying early from addiction, and processing it is not going to be easy. We also go on to suggest that connecting with groups and others who have gone through similar losses can aid in the healing process. Thank you to whoever sent this question in. We’re so sorry to hear about the challenges you’re going through, and we’re really happy that you reached out to speak about it. We hope this helped, in some small way. Thank you for submitting your questions, and for giving us a chance to help provide some advice. If you have a question, please DM me at @juliasamuelmbe or email jsamuelpod@gmail.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s episode of Therapy Works, we’re having a special talk about Mental Health Awareness Week, which - this year - is focusing on the theme of movement and its significance in mental health. We have a lot to say on the subject, including some of the language we want to share around Mental Health awareness, and how people are identifying with different states of mental health. If describing the state of our mental health is difficult to verbalise, writing can reveal to us the parts that we keep hidden and unvocalised. On the theme of movement, we’ll talk about how it can unlock one of the most powerful medicines, as well as making sure we explore our relationship with movement overall. If we’re avoiding it, why is that? And if we’re exercising in order to avoid something else that we’re trying not to feel, that’s something to bring awareness to as well. Also we all find excuses to not do any movement, but it doesn’t have to be high intensity exercise, it can be as small as little walks to break up the day or as Sophie says a little boogie when doing the washing up! Resources: To learn more about Mental Health Awareness Week, check out - https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/our-work/public-engagement/mental-health-awareness-week Otherwise, if you’re in London and want to dance, here’s Pineapple Studios - https://www.pineapple.uk.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, we’re answering a question from someone struggling after a recent breakup and full of fear of relapsing into a previous nervous breakdown. If we go through a really challenging ordeal post breakup, it would make sense that we’d be afraid of how we will be in the future, if another breakup occurs. What’s important to note is that we’re all different people now than we were before. And so, how you’ll process a future challenge isn’t the same way you’ve handled a past challenge. With that being said, we’d also like to acknowledge grief as a natural process, which often involves the full spectrum of emotions. For future challenges, we recommend practicing self-care in many forms, such as seeking therapy, journaling, and spending time with loved ones who provide positive reflections of ourselves. We’ll talk about all of this and more in this week’s episode. Thank you for submitting your questions, and for giving us a chance to help provide some advice. If you have a question, please DM me at @juliasamuelmbe or email jsamuelpod@gmail.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week’s episode of Therapy Works, Martine Wright, MBE, shares her incredible journey of resilience and transformation, from surviving the 7/7 London bombings to becoming a Paralympian.  Martine recounts the day that changed her life, her struggles in the aftermath, and the unwavering support from her family and guardian angels. She opens up about how she found new life and meaning through sport, and emphasizes the importance of kindness, support, and a positive mindset in overcoming trauma.  It’s truly amazing how glass-half-full Martine’s experience has been.  Join us as we dive into her lessons of courage, hope, and the unexpected gifts that come from facing life's extreme challenges. Show Notes: You can find out more about Martine and her story over on her website - https://martinewright.co.uk And you can read her book, Unbroken, here - https://amzn.eu/d/bWD6R7W In the Mother/Daughter section, Emily mentioned the Moth Podcast.  You can find it here - https://themoth.org/podcast Otherwise, if you’d like to connect, I post regularly on Instagram, with more thoughts and some Monday Top Tips - http://instagram.com/juliasamuelmbe/ And for more info, check out my website - https://juliasamuel.co.uk Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As we’re preparing for Season 6 of the Therapy Works podcast, I wanted to share a special episode here where I spoke with Rahul Jandial, famous Neuroscientist, speaker, author, and friend. Rahul is a dual-trained neurosurgeon and neurobiologist, and the author of “This is Why You Dream” which is what we spend most of our time discussing. We get in depth about how dreams reflect our waking life, the interconnectedness of dreams, creativity, and the human brain. Rahul shares insights on the science of dreaming, its effects on problem-solving and creativity, and the impact of dreams across various stages of life including the significance of erotic dreams and nightmares. The conversation also touches on the exploration of the dreaming brain's activities, the interpretation of dreams, and the profound relationship between dreaming and death. This conversation was so delightful to have. Being able to talk for so long about the importance of dreaming was utterly fascinating for me, and I hope you find it fascinating as well. Apologies for the audio quality, as we faced considerable technical difficulties. If you’re interested in the topic of dreaming, I know you’re going to love Rahul’s new book “This is Why You Dream,” which you can find here:- https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/454635/this-is-why-you-dream-by-jandial-rahul/9781529909449 This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/therapyworks today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp.com/therapyworks. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

For this week’s Agony Aunties episode, we were asked how to handle mood swings. And to answer that, as usual in these episodes, we have a few different angles to approach. The first thing we suggest is to bring awareness to the sympathetic and parasympathetic systems within us, and to ground our approach towards mood regulation in the physical. If our bodies and nervous systems are dysregulated, we can experience a range of affective states, both positive and negative, and so finding ways to regulate ourselves first - be it through rest, diet, or exercise - is one approach to settle the body and to manage these mood swings. We also recommend a sense of self-compassion here, as there are negative connotations to mood swings, and we hope that you don’t adopt any self-blaming language while trying to regulate your nervous system, but to approach your needs with a sense of softness and care. And, as always, we thank you for your questions here and for your prompts to these conversations. We really enjoy exploring these topics with you, so do please keep sending in your questions, and we’ll do our best to answer as many of them as we can. Please email your questions to jsamuelpod@gmail.com or DM Julia on her Instagram @juliasamuelmbe. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As we just wrapped up Season 5, and we’re ramping up for Season 6, I’d like to share with you a bonus episode with you all this week. Emily speaks to Josephine Hughes, who shares her deeply personal experience as the mother of two transgender daughters. She discusses the initial shock and adjustment period after her daughters came out, the challenges they faced, and the broader societal reactions. Josephine emphasises the importance of parental support and understanding through this transformative journey. She also touches on the misconceptions and struggles associated with transgender identity and how it affects both the individual and their family. Through her narrative, Josephine provides insight and guidance to other parents navigating similar experiences, advocating for acceptance and informed support. Resources: Josephine’s Podcast - https://gloriouslyunready.com And here’s the handout she mentioned in the episode:- https://gloriouslyunready.com/transgender/ DISCLAIMER: We are psychotherapists and are not in the position to provide medical advice. If you require support for you or your children, please find more advice here: https://www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/sex-relationships/gender-identity/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week’s episode of Agony Aunties, a new therapist asks how she can help her clients develop more self-esteem. And while the three of us practice differently with our clients, what we all agree on is the importance of exploring the client’s relationship with their self-esteem. Where does that struggle with come from? Adding some context to the moments of struggles with self-esteem, especially through practices of mindfulness and journaling, can be helpful for us to notice when our esteem is suffering, and - moreso - when these challenging thoughts arise, we can also choose to not overly identify with them.We’ll talk about this and more in this week’s episode. I hope you find it helpful. If you have any questions you’d like us to answer, please do send them over, as we love taking on your suggestions and seeing what the three of us come up with. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this special episode, I’m delighted to be speaking with Caitlin Moran seeing as my daughters and I are huge fans of her writing. In this episode, she reflects on her tough upbringing and speaks about the power and joy she found with words. She also shares her opinions on masculinity and the challenges men face in society. With her characteristic humour and sharp wit, Caitlin discusses the cultural and personal implications of men's roles, offering a fresh perspective on what it means to navigate manhood in today's world. Key Points Discussed: The Power of Words: As Caitlin is a very skilled and prolific writer, she shares her love of writing, the power of writing, and how us finding the language to express ourselves can impact the world. The Language We Use Around Children: Caitlin offers her thoughts on how younger generations are facing challenges, especially after hearing how the adults around them speak about the state of the world. Masculinity in Crisis: Caitlin explores the crisis of masculinity, noting how societal expectations and traditional roles can lead to emotional suppression among men, resulting in a range of mental health issues. Impact of Feminism on Men: She discusses the impact of feminism on men, arguing that while feminism has empowered women, it has also inadvertently highlighted the lack of emotional tools available to men, contributing to a generational disconnect. I really enjoyed this conversation and found myself laughing a lot with Caitlin. I hope you enjoy this episode as much as I did!  Resources: Get Caitlin’s new book, now in paperback: “What About Men?” - https://amzn.eu/d/cSlWgWt American Institute for Boys and Men - https://aibm.org Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices