Low libido is an epidemic and although lots of folks entering midlife report lack of libido as a chief complaint, there are many people, (record numbers actually) in their 20s and 30s with the same complaint.
The fist thing I want to say about low libido is this: don’t attribute it to your age. While your body may be going through a transition, that’s all it needs to be; a transition. It’s not “the beginning of the end.” The third chapter of your life can be the most sensually rich and sexiest chapter of your life. To give you a very personal example: my real sex life began at 40 and 19 years later, at 59, it just keeps on getting better. Prior to menopause, my libido was super low and erratic. I’ve learned a lot since then:)
The second thing I want to say is this: chronic low libido is a wake up call. The stresses of our modern high-tech lifestyle are hard on the nervous system and over time chronic stress depletes our mojo regardless of age.
While it’s natural, healthy and necessary to have periodic dips in libido, when we experience chronic low libido, our body is talking to us. By design we are meant to feel juicy, alive, creative, radiant available for pleasure much of the time. But the realities of stressful lifestyle, unprocessed emotions, stored trauma, digital overload and cultural narratives that shame our sensuality and sexuality can block the flow of our natural turn on. Is it any wonder why low libido is a chief complaint?
The third thing I want to say is this: we don’t need to boost our libido. The word boost indicates a temporary fix, like a double espresso or an energy drink. or any substance (herbal, pharmaceutical or otherwise) that “jacks us up” and creates an artificial surge of energy. We’ve had enough of that. And it’s not working.
What most women I know are craving is authentic, natural, sustainable passion. They want to feel sexy and good in their skin and they want that feeling to come from within; their own, authentic sexual essence. For this we don’t need to boost our libido we need to nourish, rejuvenate and cultivate our libido.
Our libido is the foundation of our health and happiness. To cultivate it we need to switch the focus from temporary hit to practices that promote long-lasting sexual vitality. This of course includes good nutrition, quality supplements (tonics/not boosts), exercise and time in nature. It also includes adopting a mindset and lifestyle of pleasure and practices that rejuvenate and cultivate our natural store of sexual energy from the inside out.
