Do you ever shrink, freeze, or overreact with authority figures? 

It could happen with a boss, a professor, or even a doctor. 

Your heart races, your thoughts scramble, and afterward you think, Why did I react like that?

You are not alone. 

For many women, interactions with authority can trigger strong emotional responses that may not make sense in the moment. 

Today, we are breaking down why this happens, how it shows up, and the practical steps you can take to change the pattern.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/780

You keep attracting the same relationship patterns and don't know why. Psychotherapist Jessica Baum explains it's not your fault—your body remembers childhood dynamics through implicit memory and unconsciously recreates them in adulthood. Insecure attachment lives in your nervous system, not just your mind.

Discover why healing happens through safe relationships (not isolation), how to develop "earned security" even if your childhood was chaotic, and why depending on healthy people is the counterintuitive path to inner safety. True healing is somatic, body-based, and possible at any age.

Connect with Jessica Baum on Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. Also, here is the freebie link that Jessica mentioned in the episode.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/779

Discover how childhood trauma and C-PTSD shape our ability to form healthy connections, set boundaries, and rebuild self-trust. In this episode, Anna Runkle, creator of the "Crappy Childhood Fairy," shares her journey, therapeutic writing tools, and insights from her book Connectability.

We explore emotional regulation, nervous system healing, and how to move from isolation to authentic connections. If you're interested in self-help and personal growth, this conversation offers guidance for creating deeper, lasting connections after trauma.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/770

Are you overly invested in the feeling states, situations, careers, circumstances, and relationships of the people in your life, to the detriment of your own internal peace?

So invested, that setting and maintaining boundaries feels selfish or impossible?

If so, you're not alone, and this episode is for you. I'm looking at the Boundary Boss Bill of Rights from my first book, but through the lens of high-functioning codependency because that's what my newest book, Too Much, is all about! 

For high-functioning codependents (HFCs) who are used to giving, setting boundaries can be challenging, but they're essential to our relationships. These boundary rights can serve as transformative tools for breaking free from the cycle of over-giving, people-pleasing, and self-abandonment so prevalent in HFCs.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/680

Today John and I are doing something new for the show– We're both interviewing each other for our own podcasts, at the same time! We jam on how breakups create the perfect conditions for reflection, how high-functioning codependency interferes with healthy relationships, and the ultimate purpose of love. Plus, I share some details about how I turned to the web to help more people over a decade ago!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/679

Are you tired of being the one doing all the things for all the people?

Are you the point person for everything in your family life?

Does it feel like you're the only one who can reliably get things done?

Then this episode is for you because I am talking about a common relational dynamic I see in high-functioning codependents (HFCs): how one person over-functioning causes the other to under-function. 

To illustrate this dynamic, I'm sharing an excerpt and case study from my newest book, Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency. You'll learn how this dynamic impacts us, examples of how it shows up in our relationships, and how you can stop over-functioning.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/678

Today, I'm sharing a chat with Katie Bramlett about her perfectionism, self-acceptance, and rejecting messages from society that harm our mental wellness. She tells us how questioning the toxic nature of the fitness industry led her to co-found WeShape, a fitness app focused on emotional safety and self-acceptance. Plus, how listening to and reconnecting with your body can help your mental health!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/677

How do you relate to time? 

Are you someone who's always late or meticulously early? Do you schedule yourself within an inch of your life? Do discrepancies in your relationship with time ever create conflict with others?

If you're nodding your head, then this episode is for you, my friend. I'm breaking down time boundaries and how they can become disordered. You'll also learn how to better negotiate time boundaries with yourself and others for a more harmonious relationship with time (seeing as how it IS just a construct in our minds!)

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/676

On today's episode, I'm chatting with Andrea Owen to explore the journey of self-discovery, the nuances of personal growth, and the vital role of vulnerability in relationships. Andrea shares how the re-release of her book, 52 Ways to Life a Kick-Ass Life, addresses personal growth, toxic positivity, and the role of shame in our unwanted behavior patterns. Plus, she tells us how we can use genuine vulnerability to get the help and connection we need!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/675

Physical and verbal abuse are not the only kinds of childhood trauma that can impact us in our adult lives. Though often overlooked, childhood emotional neglect from parents who were overbearing, overly lax, absent, or dismissive can lead to adult difficulties with self-esteem, emotional literacy, and boundaries. Today I am helping you determine whether you might have experienced childhood neglect and guiding you through some steps you can take to heal now that you are grown up.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/674

On today's episode, I'm so stoked to talk to Dr. Sara Gottfried, a medical doctor and hormone expert whose work I really connect with. We talk about one of my favorite subjects: The gender gap in healthcare and how we can help women navigate big hormonal changes like menopause. She also shares a more holistic and effective perspective on treatment for autoimmune disease, and tells us about her own personal boundary struggles!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/673

Is the way you care for people in your life more like codependency than real, authentic love? It's scary to think about, I know. But if you are codependent, recognizing that fact is the first step toward expressing the healthy, reciprocated care you really want to share with the people in your life.

In this episode I will guide you through the signs and symptoms that might indicate codependency in all different types of relationships: romantic, work, parent-child, and friendship. I also share what it looks like to be in recovery from codependency, so you know what to look forward to if you do think you might be codependent and you want that to change.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/672

Today, I'm sharing a chat with my new-old friend Britt Frank– We met so recently, but it feels like we've known each other forever!

We talk about getting unstuck, the importance of mind-body connection in personal growth, and how anxiety can act as a map for navigating stuckness.

Plus, Britt shares some tips and tools for overcoming fear and doubt from her new Getting Unstuck Workbook.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/671

Have you ever been in a meeting where someone suddenly calls your name and you freeze? Your mind goes completely blank, your body tenses, and even though you know the answer is in there somewhere, you cannot find the words. Or maybe you are in a heated conversation, someone accuses you of something unfair, and instead of speaking up you go silent. You just freeze.

If this has happened to you, you are not alone. Freezing in the moment is incredibly common. From CEOs to public speakers, from parents to teenagers, many of us have experienced the silent freeze. For some, it happens only occasionally. For others, it is almost chronic, showing up whenever they feel put on the spot.

In this episode of The Terri Cole Show, I am breaking down why we freeze, what it really means, and most importantly, what you can do to work with your body and mind to move through it. The good news is that there are many strategies you can practice to expand, regain your voice, and communicate more effectively.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/769

When you have a rough interaction with someone, a disappointing outcome, or you get bad news, what do you do to help yourself feel better?

Do you have a couple of drinks? Maybe smoke a little weed? Or eat a tub of ice cream? No judgment here, but I want to invite you to think about it because many of us confuse self-numbing with self-soothing. 

In this episode, you'll learn my favorite self-soothing tips, healthy ways to support your nervous system and emotional wellbeing, plus how to create your own self-soothing and stress relief toolkit. 

Learning how to effectively self-soothe can be life-changing!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/670

I am thrilled to welcome my pal, author, podcaster, and teacher, Cathy Heller, to the show to talk about her new book, Abundant Ever After: Tools for Creating a Life of Prosperity and Ease, because who doesn't want that?!

We talk about creating what you want and the resistance we feel toward that, abundance, being afraid and putting things out in the world anyway, our inherent oneness, and feeling unworthy of ease and prosperity. 

Cathy breaks all of this down in an accessible and practical way, and I know many of you will resonate with what she shares here.

Read the show notes for terricole.com/669

How much anxiety and fear are you walking around with on a daily basis? 

If you struggle with worry, fear, or anxiety consistently thrumming in the backdrop of your mind, it is worth it for you to take a look at where the roots of these thought patterns lie. 

In this episode, you'll learn simple shifts you can make to better manage anxiety so you can have less stress and more joy in your life!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/668

I am so excited to have my new pal, Cheryl Burke, on the show to talk all about why she's passionate about mental health and what got her here.

You might be familiar with Cheryl if you're a Dancing With the Stars fan, as she appeared on 26 seasons of the show and retired two years ago. 

In this conversation, she shares beautifully and candidly about the difficulties of her career, the freedom she's found in being single, and what she has learned in her six years of sobriety. 

This was such a heartfelt (new) girlfriend jam and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

*TW: sexual abuse and abuse in relationships is mentioned throughout the conversation. Please skip if these are sensitive topics for you!*

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/667

Do you find yourself doomscrolling more than ever?

Does the news of what's happening in the world negatively impact your mental state?

Do you focus more on what's wrong, making you feel like nothing is right?

Whether you're looking at the whole world or your corner of it, if the answer is yes, this episode is for you.

I'm talking all about the transformative power of gratitude, how it can impact what happens in your life, and some strategies you can use to create more of it.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/666

I am so excited to welcome psychotherapist and author Israa Nasir to the show to talk about her new book, Toxic Productivity: Reclaim Your Time and Emotional Energy in a World That Always Demands More. If you're a high-functioning codependent, tune in, because I think we tend to struggle with this! 

Israa shares practical strategies we can use to stop feeling like we need to do it all. We also touch on what healthy productivity looks like, signs you might be falling into toxic productivity, the dangers of running on autopilot, and feeling like you have to prove yourself.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/665

Do your friendships feel unbalanced? 

Are certain friendships draining?

Do your friends disrespect or trample on your boundaries?

Or do your friends bring you down rather than lift you up?

If the answer is yes, this episode is for you because it's all about assessing friendships: why we stay in unhealthy dynamics, what unhealthy friendships look like, and how to figure out what you want from friendships and what you can change.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/664

Have financial boundaries been hard for you?

Do you tend to spend more than you make?

Does "budgeting" sound unappealing?

Then you're in the right place, because I am talking with Jill Sirianni, co-author of Buy What You Love Without Going Broke: Transform Your Spending and Get More of What Money Can't Buy and co-host of the @FrugalFriends podcast. 

The book is all about connecting with your values and ensuring your financial life aligns with them. Jill is also a licensed clinical social worker and speaks to how finances affect ALL areas of our life.

I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/663

When something good happens for you, do you ever think, "Wow, I hope I don't get found out!" or, "I don't deserve this"?

Do you start doubting yourself? Do you think it must have been a mistake?

If you're nodding your head, this episode is for you because I'm talking about imposter syndrome, how to navigate it, and how to boost your confidence. 

Imposter syndrome is fresh in my mind as I ran into it writing my newest book, Too Much: A Guide to High-Functioning Codependency. I hope hearing about my experience can normalize it for you and give you some ideas on how to deal with it.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/662

When something good happens for you, do you ever think, "Wow, I hope I don't get found out!" or, "I don't deserve this"?

Do you start doubting yourself? Do you think it must have been a mistake?

If you're nodding your head, this episode is for you because I'm talking about imposter syndrome, how to navigate it, and how to boost your confidence. 

Imposter syndrome is fresh in my mind as I ran into it writing my newest book, Too Much: A Guide to High-Functioning Codependency. I hope hearing about my experience can normalize it for you and give you some ideas on how to deal with it.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/662

Emotions are not the enemy, they are the doorway to being present. In this episode with Josh Pais, we explore how emotions guide us back to being present and how embracing all emotions allows deeper self-growth.

Discover simple tools to accept emotions, stop resisting, and practice being present every day. If you're curious about emotions, mindfulness, and the freedom that comes from being present, this episode is for you.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/768

Do you ever get so close to achieving a goal, and then something stops you from achieving it?

Do you find yourself getting in your own way and self-sabotaging?

Then you'll want to tune in because I have Dr. Sophie Mort on the show talking about her newest book, (Un)Stuck: Five Steps to Break Bad Habits and Get Out of Your Own Way, which I think we could all use!

We talk about all the ways you can get unstuck and shift from feeling disempowered to empowered, the reasons why changing habits is hard, the compulsion to repeat our past, and the drama triangle (which can explain a lot about the ways we relate to others).

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/661

Do you feel heard in your relationships with your spouse, kids, colleagues, friends, and family?

Do you find you get the results you're seeking when talking to people?

Do you feel understood? 

If the answer is no or sometimes, this episode is for you. I'm covering what effective communication is, what it looks like, how to get better at it, and giving you scripts to use to be more accurately understood.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/660

I am so excited to share this conversation about building epic love with my pal, psychiatrist and relationship expert Dr. Ish Major. 

We met at the Real Love Ready Relationship Summit in Vancouver only to realize we were both heading to LA after to the set of Nick Cannon's Counsel Culture. 

We talk about how Dr. Ish's interest in psychology came to be and how his childhood experiences impacted him, and then the conversation turns to codependency in relationships. 

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/

Dr. ish says he was a "card carrying captain of team codependence" for the first 40 years of his life, which I think a lot of us can relate to! He shares the lessons he learned and he offers so much wisdom in really simple, accessible terms. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/659

Are there people in your life who are conflict connoisseurs? People who really love stirring the pot, who are addicted to drama?

In response to you being upset, these types of people might rile you up or suggest you should be angrier rather than talking you off a ledge.

I know many of you are not into stirring the pot but find yourselves with high conflict lovers in your life, which can be stressful. That's why I'm talking about high conflict versus healthy conflict, how to identify high-conflict people and protect yourself from them, and steps for more constructive ways to manage conflict.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/658

I am thrilled to have Dr. Mindy Pelz back on the show in celebration of her new book, _Eat Like A Girl: 100+ Delicious Recipes to Balance Hormones, Boost Energy, and Burn Fat._ Who doesn't want that?!

Dr. Mindy and I talk about everything from why we struggle to lose weight with age, our philosophies on aging, how to eat for the stage of life you're in, and how to produce GLP-1 hormones naturally within your own body. 

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

Read the show notes about today's episode at terricole.com/657

Are there couples who make you think, what do they know about love that I don't? How do they do it?

Or do you see couples on TV and wonder, how can I get that kind of love? Where can I even find it?

If so, this episode is for you because I am sharing reflections from 25 years of marriage (I can't believe it!) to my one and only, Vic, about how we've kept it good, and how to apply these lessons to your relationships.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/656

I am so excited to welcome my pal Tamsen Fadal back to the show to talk about her new documentary, The M Factor: Shredding the Silence On Menopause. It's available to stream right now on PBS! 

Tamsen is an award-winning news anchor and menopause advocate, and she combined her skills and passion to create this amazing documentary. 

During our conversation, Tamsen and I talk about our experiences with perimenopause and menopause, the lesser-known symptoms many women have, how the documentary came about, the hope Tamsen has for how it will impact the healthcare we receive as women, and so much more.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/655

How do you react to seeing a friend, sibling, or partner having a rough time? 

Not how do you respond, but how do you react?

Do you immediately jump to share ideas or thoughts to try to fix their problem? 

Or do you inadvertently invalidate their feelings by saying, "Hey, it's not so bad. It'll be better tomorrow"? 

If you're nodding your head, this episode is for you. I am talking about the transformative power of learning to sit with emotional discomfort, why you may feel compelled to avoid it by taking action, and what you can do instead.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/654

I am so excited to welcome Emily Sadri to the show to talk all things perimenopause! She's a Board Certified Women's Health Nurse Practitioner, Certified Nurse Midwife, and hormone expert who's helped thousands of women through this journey. 

Emily is amazing at breaking down complex topics and making them accessible, and we got into the weeds on weight loss, insomnia, and how and why the loss of estrogen affects us so deeply.

If you want more info, join the summit for free! I'll be speaking there:  https://perimenopauserevolution.com/?orid=16

North American Menopause Society: https://www.menopause.org/ (referenced during the interview)

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/653

Do you tend to lose yourself in relationships?

Are you a people pleaser who prioritizes others above yourself?

Do you look outside yourself for validation?

If you answered yes and you're tired of these relational dynamics, you're in the right place because I'm talking all about self-abandonment: what it is, why we do it, the signs, and how you can move into self-consideration instead.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/652

Sobriety doesn't have to come from rock bottom, it can be a conscious choice for self-growth and mental freedom. In this episode, author Suzanne Warye shares her journey from "mommy wine culture" to reclaiming her clarity, health, and purpose.

Discover how reframing sobriety can transform your relationship with yourself, break free from limiting beliefs, and empower you to outgrow what no longer serves you. This conversation is for anyone questioning alcohol and seeking a path of conscious living.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/767

I am so thrilled to have my pal, embodiment expert and author Elizabeth DiAlto, back on the show! 

We talked about Elizabeth's new fiction book, Dark Healing, and why she wrote it, as well as the differences between being triggered and activated, how embodiment can help us get out of our minds and into our body, the spiritual aspect of embodiment, and so much more. 

I hope you enjoy this girlfriend jam as much as I did!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/651

How do you feel about asking others for help?

Are you good at it, or do you avoid it because you don't want to 'owe' anybody anything?

Do you find it difficult to believe other people will show up for you the way you show up for them?

Or does being vulnerable scare you?

If you're nodding your head, this episode is for you. I am talking all about hyper-independence: what it is, why it matters, what causes us to act this way, signs to help you identify whether this is you, and how to shift into healthy independence and interdependence.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/650

I am so excited to welcome my science girl crush, Leah Elson, to the show to talk about a variety of things: her book, There Are No Stupid Questions in Science, why she's so passionate about being a public science communicator, her pivot from sportscasting into this field, and how she is working to give herself more grace and place less pressure on herself. 

If you're a fellow high-functioning codependent, I really think this is one you'll relate to!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/649

Do you believe that setting boundaries means being confrontational?

Do you wish you knew how to cut someone off nicely, especially if it involves a professional relationship?

Are you tired of confiding in others only for them to make your own pain into something about them?

Or have you wondered if it's ever okay to "jump in and fix things" for someone who is struggling?

These are just some questions I'm answering about boundaries and high-functioning codependency in this episode. Let's dive in.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/648

I am so excited to have my pal, best-selling author and speaking expert, Ashley Stahl back on the show to talk all things public speaking!

Whether you want to give keynote speeches, give a presentation at work, or pitch a crucial project, Ashley's tips will help you shine. We talked about the aspects of viral speeches, from the title to the opening and structure, as well as stage presence and the power of pausing.

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/647

Does it feel like if you don't fix problems or move things forward, no one will?

Do you feel overly responsible, like everything will fall apart if you don't do all the things?

Do you just find yourself saying, "It's just faster/easier/more efficient if I do it myself"?

If you're nodding your head, this episode is for you because I am talking about the five traits of high-functioning codependency (HFC), the cycle of codependency I often see my clients go through, and how to shift from over-doing and over-giving into more balance and less exhaustion.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/646

I am thrilled to welcome world-renowned grief expert, David Kessler, to the show to talk about his new workbook, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief Workbook: Tools for Releasing Pain and Remembering with Love.

Unresolved grief is so common, and I love the way David makes this topic so accessible. During this conversation, we talk about ALL kinds of grief, because it's not just about losing someone you love. It's also about endings and abrupt changes. 

David is such a kind soul and no matter what loss you've experienced, I think you'll find comfort and hope in his message.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/645

Do you automatically accommodate others because it's the "nice" thing to do?

Do you consistently overthink how your actions will impact others?

Are you always on the lookout for how you can help people or solve problems?

If you've ever wondered where the line is between codependent, caring, or controlling behavior, this episode is for you. 

I'm breaking down the distinction by discussing a little-known aspect of codependency, sharing real-life examples to clarify, and providing tips on how to shift from codependency to healthy giving.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/644

I am so thrilled to welcome Hospice Nurse Julie to the show to talk to us all about end-of-life care: what to expect, what actively dying looks like, why it's so important to normalize discussing death, and what inspired Julie to start posting on TikTok and write her book, Nothing to Fear: Demystifying Death to Live More Fully.

If you're afraid of dying, or even thinking about death, this conversation might just be the one you need to hear. Julie's content went viral on TikTok just after 4 days which speaks to the need for education around death and dying. And getting educated often reduces our fear around it, so I hope you enjoy this conversation with Julie as much as I did.

CW: a large portion of this conversation focuses on death and dying, and Julie talks about what actively dying looks like at the 22 minute mark. If you're sensitive to this, please consider skipping that section or this conversation.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/643

Do you find it hard to open up to people, especially when you're struggling?

Is it hard for you to ask for or allow help?

Have you ever had a crisis where you kept what was happening to yourself because you didn't want to worry anyone? 

If you're nodding yes, today's video is for you because I'm sharing the high-functioning codependent (HFC) behaviors I noticed in myself as I navigated a recent health scare. 

I'm also talking about the hidden cost of not asking for help. 

By sharing my story, I hope to inspire you to care for your health and let other people show up for you.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/642

For many of us, emotional security is the missing piece in our relationships. It's subtle, but its absence is exhausting. Without it, love feels like walking on eggshells, never fully able to relax into who we are.

This week on The Terri Cole Show, I share what emotional security really means, why it matters so much, and how to start cultivating it in yourself and with the people you love. Because when it's missing, everything is more challenging than it needs to be. But when it is present, everything becomes easier and more transparent.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/766

I am so excited to have my pal and one half of The Astrotwins, Ophira Edut, back on the show to talk about her and Tali's new book, The Astrology Advantage: Use Your Horoscope for Personal and Professional Success. 

It's a new way of looking at your birth chart to figure out which archetype you are: Innovator, Authority, or Maven. Ophira dives into what each type does best (we're both Innovators!) and how she and Tali created it. 

We also talk about how Ophira got into astrology, how she got me into it, and how it can be a useful tool in your life.

I hope you enjoy this girlfriend jam as much as I did!

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/641

Have you ever wondered whether you're too close with your family of origin?

Does it feel like your life kinda revolves around them?

Or are you guilted and shamed by them for wanting to pursue your own thing?

Then this episode is for you because it's all about family enmeshment: what it is, five signs to identify whether you grew up in this type of family system, the impact it has on us as adults, and how to begin thinking about setting healthy boundaries with your family.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/640

I am so excited to welcome my new pal, author Najwa Zebian, to the show to talk about her newest book, The Only Constant: A Guide to Embracing Change and Leading an Authentic Life.

We cover so much, from feeling like an outsider to setting boundaries with friends (and social media followers), to navigating change that we didn't choose and how to come into acceptance, and so much more. 

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/639