This week! Uncle Mark thinks we need to take a long, hard look at Medusa, Uncle Doug tells us about the most hopeless Pope with Clement VII, and we break the news about a much-needed break.

This week! Uncle Mark can't see too good with the Urim and Thummim, Uncle Doug chooses to slow rather than fast with Ramadan, and Uncle Dan cracks all things chiropractic. 

This week! Uncle Mark gazes into the past to find someone that could not see the future, Uncle Dan sends your Valentine a drunk naked bouquet, and Uncle Doug thinks the dead deserve to be remembered for who they were in life.

This week! Uncle Mark looks at the moon and wonders what's inside, Uncle Dan commands the healer to heal himself, and Uncle Doug puts Dan through the worthiness paces and finds him wanting.

This week! Uncle Mark finds the tragic in magic, Uncle Dan takes an extraterrestrial joy-ride, and Uncle Doug is looking for somebody to take care of something for him, no questions asked, must be discreet.

This week! Uncle Mark finds a book so full of true and good things he nearly had an aneurysm, and Uncle Dan finds out what the Bible has to say about abortion (and it's not what most people think). 

This week! Uncle Dan explains beard electricity, Uncle Doug wants you to meet his mother and Uncle Mark is lost in allegorical gore. Come join the fun!

This week! Uncle Doug lampoons a laughable linguistic leap, Uncle Dan guides us to derp into black helicopter country, and we discuss the Bible's most stupid math-tastrophe.

This week Uncle Mark meets a girl the Devil swallowed whole and Phil Ferguson joins us to help us How-To money!

This week! Your Uncles report from the psychiatric ICU about their lost weekend in the Creationist hellscape of Northern Kentucky and their terminal mental Banana poisoning in the form of Ray Comfort. Pray for us.

This week! Uncle Mark has a weird case of the Mondays, Uncle Doug discovers the only Christian hypocrite ever, and Uncle Dan serves a light buffet lakeside.

This week! Uncle Mark dances as fast as he can, Uncle Doug talks shit about a dead guy who richly deserves it, and Uncle Dan ponders how much religion is too much religion in the workplace. 

This week! Uncle Doug runs out of ammo and then shit gets sad, and Uncle Dan tells us the weirdest ‘fish bites man’ story that people actually believe. 

This week! Uncle Doug tells us the sad story of a very lonely island with Makemake, Uncle Dan takes us Christian shopping, and Uncle Mark sets sad sail to the Goa Inquisition.

This week! Uncle Mark introduces us to an unchosen chosen one and Dr. Darrel Ray of Recovering From Religion and The Secular Therapy Project joins us to talk about getting out and getting good!

This week! Uncle Dan throws us a curve (hurling) ball and Michael Marsh from the Be Reasonable podcast joins us to explain the impossibility of his continued sanity, despite the odds.

This week! Uncle Doug explores job opportunities for ancient bigots, Uncle Dan takes us to a very weird war, and listeners join Uncle Mark to help send a terrible idea to the hell it deserves!

This week! Uncle Mark thinks it’s getting hot, Uncle Doug rests his weary head, and Dr. Christoper Stroop helps us expose Christian Schools!

This week! Uncle Dan prepares us for a naked eternity, Uncle Mark digs deep and comes up with nothing, and Uncle Doug thinks there's an upside to being nice? Whatever. 

This week! Uncle Mark pussyfoots around portraiture, have you been diagnosed with - anything? Uncle Dan has a pill for that and Uncle Doug makes us Square that Circle for cash or prizes!

This week, Uncle Dan has a genealogical catastrophe, Uncle Mark shows us the world's deadliest ball game, and Uncle Doug sells us all out then falls over and explodes. 

This week! Uncle Doug gets forceful, Uncle Mark describes a Pope on the ropes and Uncle Dan fails to make a name for himself.

This week! Uncle Mark seriously bums us out, Uncle Doug gives us a hydrology report, and Uncle Dan asks us to just accept him.

This week! Uncle Mark gives the Space Force its first assignment, Uncle Doug boldly breaks with himself, and Uncle Dan Prays for us to agree with him.

This week! Uncle Mark asks "what's in the box?" with Orgone Energy, Uncle Dan puts 3rd Nephi out of our misery, and Uncle Doug makes us all want to jump off the edge of the flat Earth!

This week! Uncle Mark introduces us to a boy with a simple dream to fly an arena into space, and Uncle Dan gets circumspect about mutilating babies for no reason.

This week! Uncle Mark knocks everybody down for money, Uncle Dan gives up all his passions forever, and Uncle Doug explores the fount of eternal sadness that is Mitt Romney.

This week! Uncle Doug shows us that cities are for closers, Uncle Dan gets his wands in our cups, and Uncle Mark sloth shames us.

This week! Uncle Mark introduces us to some very peculiar bird watchers, Uncle Dan discovers the origins of truck nutz, and Uncle Doug curses Uncle Dan’s slovenly ways in-studio! Remember 20% of all Dec Patreon donations go to the @FFRF !!

This week! Uncle Dan serves up a weird-ass McRib and Uncle Mark tries to figure out How-To atheist. And don’t forget, 20% of all December Patreon dollars go to the Freedom From Religion Foundation!

This week! Uncle Mark introduces us to the mother of all pretenders, Uncle Doug is surprised by Thursday, and Patrick Elliot from the Freedom From Religion Foundation joins us to talk about building that wall!

Watch the BBC documentary on Mother Teresa here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NJG-lgmPvYA

And help support the work of the Freedom From Religion Foundation here: https://ffrf.org/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIhM-3---T3wIVCRBpCh0YTQwWEAAYASAAEgJD6PD_BwE

https://howtoheretic.com

https://www.patreon.com/howtoheretic

This week! Uncle Mark shows us some junk in a magic trunk, Uncle Dan tries to scare us with a silly chicken-man devil, and Tony McAleer from Life After Hate joins us to talk about how to leave hate behind!

Find Tony McAleer and his amazing organization here:

https://www.lifeafterhate.org

@mcaleer

This week! Uncle Dan casts a hard glance at some very old dumb, Uncle Mark deserts the Army, and Uncle Doug lures us into a laughable legend!

This week! Uncle Doug serves up vodka and applesauce, Uncle Dan shows us you can’t spell pilgrim without ‘grim’, and Professor Nathan tries to get us to change over time.

This week! Uncle Mark has a nose made of bone, Uncle Dan gets buried alive, and Uncle Doug brings us the torturous conclusion of the Book of Revelation.

This week! Uncle Dan gives us the damage report with 3rd Nephi part 2, Uncle Mark wonders how many atoms your gold has with the Anunnaki, and Uncle Doug ruins a perfectly good time with Project Blitz. 

This week! Uncle Mark shows us it’s not always good to be King, Uncle Dan introduced us to the Lord of the Incels, and our Irish correspondent Rudy gives us reason to hope against long odds.

*Special announcement, Heretics! Your audio uncles will be joining the gangs from The Scathing Atheist and Cognitive Dissonance this month for the annual Vulgarity for Charity fundraiser - once again raising money for Modest Needs. It's a great cause and a lot of fun, so check out the link below to participate! You do something nice and we'll do something mean! How fun is that?

https://scathingatheist.com/2018/11/01/vulgarity-for-charity-2018/

This week! Uncle Mark pushes your planchette, Uncle Doug serves us a tiny sandwich at the weirdest possible moment, and we get caught up on all the good Patron love!!

This Week! Uncle Dan asks ‘what’s the frequency, Peter?’, Uncle Mark warns us about a hole new level of crazy, and we have the first of many How-To’s about getting more comfortable the bees and the birds!

(Important Patreon note!! A scheduling issue made us record VERY early this week. It has been an incredible week for your Patronage, but please know new patrons will not be included in this week's show. We WILL acknowledge all of you next week! We swear! And THANK YOU!!!)

This week! Uncle Mark introduces us to a weird old lady, Uncle Dan gets spooked by two little girls in a hallway, and our friend Tori Williams Douglass joins us for a How-To call to arms!

This week! We celebrate one of history’s greatest monsters (for some reason), we cast an old spell on Uncle Mark, and Uncle Doug really DOES not like Oaks.

This week! Uncle Doug Haunts our Heavenly Father, Uncle Dan tries to not touch us, and Uncle Mark finds a thing that is not theology but it’s not philosophy and there will be moon-monkeys.

This week! Uncle Dan asks us to hold his can, Uncle Mark takes us boating, and we begin to explore How-To push back against those who are used to doing all the pushing unopposed. 

This week, Uncle Mark takes us below the surface, Uncle Dan promises us brandy but brings some weird milk instead, but luckily Uncle Doug brings a little something unexpected to the party. Won’t you come dumb with us!

This week! We have an all 9-11, all the time-themed show! How fun is that? Uncle Mark once again proves the worst ideas come out of the desert and Uncle Doug gives us another reason to cry about a no good, terrible day.

This week! Uncle Mark sets a bloody tone, Uncle Doug shows us 3 billboards outside of a discernible point, and Uncle Dan tells us about a new job in a very old company that no sane person is gonna want to take. 

This week! Uncle Dan makes the Book of Mormon seem kinda dumb with 3rd Nephi part 1, Uncle Mark thinks the story of Saint Bartholomew the Apostle should be rated R, and Uncle Doug does a Q with no A with Heretics in the news!

This week! Uncle Dan tells us about Onan, the reason nobody ever masturbates, Uncle Mark helps us all place the blame squarely where it belongs with The Protocols of the Elders of Zion, and Uncle Doug makes sure we do not A.C.E. the test. What a mess.

This week! Uncle Mark dips us into a seven layer heaven, Uncle Doug has some kind of attitude issue, and Uncle Dan introduces us to a god that wasn’t but now kind of is. There’s a lot to unpack here. 

This week! Uncle Dan asks why almighty God couldn’t create an editor, Uncle Mark ventures to the Moons, and the delightful David Ellis Dickerson put’s us through our Biblical 3:16 paces. Come join us, won't you?

Some of David Ellis Dickerson’s fantastic storytelling:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MnCjpw7iBI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSZRXs6l4Z8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JuVg2uxOn24