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TitreDateDurée
Managing High Performers Who Struggle with Team Dynamics: A High-Stakes Conversation15 Oct 202400:52:15

In this episode, we discuss how to handle situations where a high-performing employee or leader is creating interpersonal challenges in the workplace. Whether you're a manager, team member, or leader, dealing with someone who excels technically but struggles with people skills can be tricky. We explore the risks of not addressing the issue, strategies for providing constructive feedback, and how to prepare for these tough conversations. Plus, we roleplay a common scenario to demonstrate key techniques. Join us for practical tips and insights on managing difficult workplace dynamics.

Key Topics:

  • Why interpersonal conflict matters even with high performance
  • Strategies to provide constructive feedback
  • How to prepare for difficult conversations with concrete examples
  • The importance of aligning behavior with organizational culture
  • Roleplay demonstration: How to approach a divisive leader

Takeaways:

  • Preparation and concrete data are key when addressing difficult conversations.
  • Ask the right questions to uncover underlying motivations and behavioral patterns.
  • Don’t avoid the conversation—address it early to prevent larger issues later.

Difficult Conversations Newsletter

Want more updates on how to handle difficult conversations?  Grab your weekly copy here: www.tinyurl.com/leadershippotential

 Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

 

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Helping Husbands Get Through Marital Issues - Interview with Randy Pryor08 Oct 202400:55:57

What can you say if your wife wants a separation? Or a divorce?

 If you’re like most men, you’ll feel blindsided and/or you’ll immediately try to figure out how to solve this problem.  Unfortunately, that’s actually not the right way to approach it at all.

 In this week’s episode, Lucie and Chris talk with Randy, an experienced relationship coach focused on helping separated husbands reconnect with their wives. His faith-based methods center around growing closer to Christ and becoming the best version of ourselves, which provides the greatest chance of reconciling marriages.

 Here he shares his best tips, including:

  Why talking about it may not actually be the best option

  •  How problem-solving approaches don’t work
  •  What it means to actually be a better person, and not just doing it for your spouse.

Randy collaborates with professionals, business owners, and executives. Good men who accept responsibility for their part in the breakdown of their marriage and seek to reconnect with their wives. Through live sessions and actionable strategies, Randy and his coaches support them while holding them accountable, ensuring their relationships improve.

Before coaching, Randy was a professional comedy magician/juggler on cruise ships all over the world. His previous experience in the “funny business” helps lighten the mood when discussing the serious topics of separation and divorce, and helps husbands realize that, with Christ, there is ALWAYS hope.

 Connect with Randy here:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/coachrandypryor/

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@hopeforseparatedhusbands

Website: https://RandyPryor.com or http://SOSRandy.com

 

Difficult Conversations Newsletter

Want more updates on how to handle difficult conversations?  Grab your weekly copy here: www.tinyurl.com/leadershippotential

 Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

 

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

01: How to Negotiate a Raise - the Do's and Don'ts06 Aug 202400:52:43

The Do’s and Don’ts of negotiating a raise

 Summary:

 Being paid fairly for your work is always a hot topic issue.  In fact, if you’ve been at your company for quite a while, you should consider asking for a raise.

 And it’s not just an intellectual exercise.

Not getting a raise can cost you hundreds of thousands of dollars over the course of your career and you might be missing out on valuable buffers against inflation.

 But it’s not about asking for a raise – it’s about learning how to negotiate that raise.  It’s a difficult conversation especially if you are squeamish talking about money or touting your own accomplishments. 

 In today’s episode, Lucie and Chris walk through the Do’s and Don’ts of difficult conversations around negotiating a raise.

 They cover:

  • The importance of research
  • Focusing on value and growth of the company
  • Creating a collaborative environment

 And teach you how NOT to do it, including:

  • Don’t lie/bluff/threaten
  • Don’t talk about fairness

Then they demonstrate how to do the conversation in two different scenarios. 

Let us know what you think – what could Chris have done differently to negotiate his raise?

Resources

Instagram account that Chris referenced around salary transparency – Salary Transparent Street

Info about Mastering Difficult Conversations Course

Contact Us 

Instagram

Youtube

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

34: Personal Conversations Roleplays - Compilation of Season 130 Jul 202402:06:13

Join us for another compilation episode! This time, we put together Season One's most popular roleplay episodes of personal relationship scenarios.

Enjoy!

Do you have feedback or tips for what we could do in season two?

Please let us know!

Connect with us here:

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn: Chris—www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie—www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Want to be a guest on our podcast? Let us know.

33: Compilation of professional relationship scenarios (Roleplays)23 Jul 202401:29:21

Join us for another compilation episode! This time, we put together Season one's most popular roleplay episodes of professional relationship scenarios. 

Enjoy! 

Do you have feedback? Tips what we could do in season two? Please let us know! 

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Want to be a guest on our podcast? Let us know.

 

32: Special Compilation Episode: Most Popular Interviews16 Jul 202402:46:55

Today, we're doing something a little different. Over the past few months, we've had some amazing guests share their wisdom, personal stories, and strategies for navigating tough conversations. As we reach a new milestone and are completing season 1 of our podcast, we wanted to take a moment to celebrate and revisit together the most popular and impactful interviews from season one! And btw, we are already recording some new cool episodes for season two, so stay tuned!

In this compilation episode, you'll hear from:

  • Andrea Horton-Meriçli, who shared about overcoming imposter syndrome, how do you find your own voice and find the confidence to be yourself
  • Steven Farber, where we discussed how knowing different personality styles can make any of your conversations more impactful and effective
  • Tiffany Teng, who explores how cultural and family backgrounds can shape the way we handle conflicts
  • Last but not least, with Tahi Matejko we will explore what you should do first before you even have the difficult conversation with your partner if you want to have a strong and good relationship with them

Do you have feedback? Tips what we could do in season two? Please let us know! 

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Want to be a guest on our podcast? Let us know.

31: Compillation Episode - Strategies for Difficult Conversations 09 Jul 202401:09:53

Join us for the Season 1 Compilation Episode, focusing on several strategies that can make your difficult conversations better and more effective. 

Do you have feedback? Tips what we could do in season two? Please let us know! 

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Want to be a guest on our podcast? Let us know.

 

30: Wrapping Up Season One: Reflections and Future Plans02 Jul 202400:48:58

Join us for the final episode of season one of our podcast! Thank you for joining us on this journey, for all your comments and support, and for your curiosity and commitment to improving your conversations - be it in your personal or professional life. Thank you! 

What do we cover in this episode?

  1. Unexpected Beginnings: Chris and Lucie reflect on how their podcast collaboration started despite never meeting in person and living on opposite coasts.
  2. Gratitude and Growth: Both hosts express gratitude for each other's contributions, highlighting how they kept the podcast structured and moving forward.
  3. Celebrating Milestones: They celebrate reaching over 2000 downloads and the positive impact on their listeners' lives.
  4. Challenges and Lessons: Chris and Lucie share personal challenges they faced during roleplays and how they grew from these experiences.
  5. Future Plans: Exciting plans for Season Two, including combining strategy and roleplay episodes and incorporating guest experts into roleplays.

Do you have feedback? Tips what we could do in season two? Please let us know! 

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Want to be a guest on our podcast? Let us know.

29 How Authenticity Can Give You Courage to Speak Up25 Jun 202400:26:27

In this episode, we sit down with Aries Yeo, a former banking executive turned leadership coach, to discuss how her cultural background and upbringing make it often difficult for her to speak up. She provides insights into how her value of authenticity gives her the courage to overcome these cultural barriers and personal fears and enables her to engage in meaningful dialogues.

Key Takeaways:

  • Being authentic involves self-awareness and respect for others.
  • Cultural and personal backgrounds shape how we handle conversations.
  • Authentic communication requires acknowledging and embracing differences.
  • Self-love and self-acceptance are fundamental to being true to yourself.
  • Effective dialogue often begins with understanding others’ viewpoints.

Can you relate to her experience? What gives you the courage to speak up even when you as a child were discouraged to? How did you learn to find and own your voice?

If you have a personal story you would like to share with us, let us know

Connect with Aries: 

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

 

 

 

28: How to Ask Your Partner to Keep the Place Clean (Roleplay) 18 Jun 202400:31:22

Join us this week to explore how to talk with your partner (spouse) about household chores and responsibilities.

In this episode, Chris Wong and Lucie Tesarova role-play a couple: one is a bit messier, and the other would prefer to have the household cleaner. See what mistakes Chris made in the first scenario, and what he did differently in the second take of this roleplay. 

What could you take away from these conversations about how to have or not have these types of conversations in your personal life? Let us know!

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Want to be a guest on our podcast? Let us know.

 

27: How to Validate Others to Make your Communication More Effective & Relationships Stronger 11 Jun 202400:13:23

Summary:

In this episode, Lucie explores the transformative power of validation in communication. Learn how validation can break the cycle of miscommunication, reduce conflicts, and foster deeper connections in both personal and professional relationships. By the end of the episode, you’ll understand what validation is, why it’s crucial for effective communication, and how to apply it in your daily interactions.

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

🤝 If you have questions or want to share your experiences, feel free to reach out. We’re here to support your journey towards healthier connections.

#Podcast #PersonalDevelopment #CommunicationSkills #Relationships #communication 

26: Don't have difficult conversations unless you do this - Interview with Relationship Coach Tahi Matejko04 Jun 202400:57:25

In this episode of the Art and Science of Difficult Conversations, we have a special guest, a performance and relationship coach, Tahi Matejko.

In this interview episode with Lucie Tesarova, Tahi is sharing not only lessons learned from growing up in a multicultural environment and how it aided in making the difficult conversations better in her family, but also tune in to this episode to find out how you can make your relationship conversations with your partner more effective and loving.

Connect with Tahi:

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

🤝 If you have questions or want to share your experiences, feel free to reach out. We’re here to support your journey towards healthier connections.

#Podcast #PersonalDevelopment #CommunicationSkills #Relationships #communication 

How to deal with interruptions01 Oct 202400:41:55

In this episode, Chris and Lucie discuss what to do when someone keeps interrupting you while you speak, or, when you are the one who keeps interrupting others and want to stop :)

Key Takeaways:

Reasons for Interrupting:

  • Having lots of ideas and wanting to share them.
  • Reacting emotionally (anger, upset) and wanting to defend yourself.
  • Feeling a need to show expertise or control the conversation.

How to Stop Interrupting Yourself:

  • Self-awareness: Notice how often you interrupt.
  • Note-taking: Jot down ideas as the other person speaks to come back to later.
  • Calming Techniques: Use grounding tools (rock, deep breaths) to manage anxiety.
  • Listen to Understand: Focus on truly understanding the other person's perspective.

How to Deal with People who Interrupt:

  • Have a conversation with them 1:1 and communicate the impact the interruptions have on you/team and without blame, ask, e.g., 'In our next meeting, what could we do to make sure your points get heard, and also I get to finish what I want to say first?"
  • Think about Ground Rules: E.g., establish agreements on taking turns or focusing on one point at a time.
  • Muting Yourself (Online): If triggered, mute your microphone to avoid interrupting unintentionally. (Not applicable in person)

Any other ideas, what has worked for you?

Let us know!

Contact Us

Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

 

25: How to deal with a guilt-tripping friend (Roleplay)28 May 202400:29:44

🎙️ Navigating Difficult Conversations: Setting Boundaries with Empathy 🎙️

In our latest podcast episode, Lucie and Chris dove deep into a scenario many of us can relate to – setting boundaries with a friend who tends to guilt-trip. 🛑

Boundaries are essential for maintaining healthy relationships, yet many struggle to assert them without feeling guilty or aggressive. Here's a quick recap of our role-play and the key takeaways:

🔍 Scenario: Chris had to cancel plans with Lucie, a friend of 30 years, due to unforeseen family circumstances. Lucie felt hurt and expressed this in a confrontational manner.

🙌 What Worked:

  • Empathy and Validation: Acknowledging the other person's feelings can significantly reduce conflict.
  • Alternative Solutions: Offering a different plan shows commitment to the relationship despite setbacks.
  • Focusing on Personal Impact: Sharing how actions affect you personally helps maintain a respectful conversation.

What to Avoid:

  • Defensiveness: It often escalates the situation and prevents resolution.
  • Assumptions: Assuming the other person’s intentions can lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Setting boundaries doesn’t have to be confrontational – it can be a pathway to deeper understanding and respect.

🔗 Resources: We've created a "Difficult Conversation Checklist" as a part of our "How to prepare effectively for difficult conversations webinar" to help you navigate these tough talks.  

Remember, healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and clear communication. Let's strive to create more of these in our personal and professional lives.

🤝 If you have questions or want to share your experiences, feel free to reach out. We’re here to support your journey towards healthier connections.

#Podcast #PersonalDevelopment #CommunicationSkills #SettingBoundaries #EmpathyInAction #ProfessionalGrowth

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

24: On Guilt-Tripping and How to Deal With It21 May 202400:27:48

In this episode of the "Art and Science of Difficult Conversations" podcast, we tackle the challenging topic of setting boundaries around guilt-tripping. Lucie delves into identifying guilt-tripping behaviors, understanding the difference between healthy (constructive) and unhealthy (destructive) guilt, and exploring why guilt-tripping happens so that we can show empathy towards ourselves and others. Learn practical steps to recognize guilt-tripping phrases and behaviors, and discover how to set and communicate effective boundaries to improve your well-being and relationships.

Key Points:

  1. Understanding Guilt Tripping: Learn to identify guilt-tripping behaviors in yourself and others and why self-awareness is essential.
  2. Healthy (Constructive) vs. Unhealthy (Destructive) Guilt: Distinguish between guilt that promotes positive change and guilt that leads to excessive self-blame and emotional manipulation.
  3. Recognizing Guilt Tripping: Examples of common guilt-tripping phrases and internal signals that indicate you might be experiencing or inflicting guilt tripping.
  4. Why Guilt Tripping Happens: Explore the underlying reasons for guilt tripping, including control, insecurity, and learned behaviors.
  5. Steps to Set Boundaries:
    1. Self-Awareness: Identify your values and the type of relationships you desire.
    2. Recognize Guilt Tripping: Notice guilt-tripping behaviors and your emotional responses.
    3. Empathy and Compassion: Practice empathy for yourself and others involved.
    4. Identify Boundaries: Determine what boundaries are necessary to maintain your well-being.
    5. Communicate Boundaries: Effectively communicate your boundaries with others.

Questions? Comments? What did we do well? Where should we get better? Suggestions for our next roleplays? 

Let us know! :)

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

23: Talking about body image - Interview with Laura Conley14 May 202400:43:48

How do we have conversations about body image?

Especially in a culture where a high premium is placed on how we look and how much we weigh, it’s hard to find confidence in our own bodies.

Today, Lucie and Chris interview a special guest, Laura Conley who experienced her own journey to being comfortable, both in her own skin and with talking with others about it.

Laura is a Certified Life + Weight Loss Coach. She helps mamas who have been painfully struggling with diet drama (+ who have tried EVERYTHING) to lovingly lose weight for the last time and free themselves from food forever. She is on a maniacal mission to do this so that her clients can pass down a beautiful legacy to their children around food and bodies, weigh what they want, and live the life they have always dreamed of without the weight and drama in the way. She does this by coaching her clients on how to balance their hunger hormones, rewire their brains, handle hard emotions, take daily accountability, and become their own bestie.

Website: www.lauraconley.com

IG: @‌lauraconleycoaching

Podcast: https://www.lauraconley.com/podcast ‌

DISCOUNT on the Yummy Mummy Experience: U

se code BESTIE to get $500 off The Yummy Mummy Experience: 6 months of group coaching, coursework, and a private community guaranteeing you lose weight for the last time. The cohorts start in January, April, July, and September! ‌ ‌

FREE OFFER: As a listener of the show, you get "The Create Your Perfect Weight Loss Plan, PLAN: Lose 10 pounds in 30 days" for FREE with this special link: https://portal.lauraconley.com/offers/2TeoQUtC?coupon_code=CHRISWONG

Questions? Comments? What did we do well? Where should we get better? Suggestions for our next roleplays? 

Let us know! :)

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

22: How to Deal with Staff Member Pushing Back on Delegation (Roleplay) 07 May 202400:18:13

Episode Overview: In this role-play episode, Lucie and Chris delve into a common workplace challenge: managing delegation effectively, especially when team members resist added responsibilities.

They simulate a scenario where Lucie, the manager, tries to delegate tasks left by a departed colleague to Chris, who is hesitant to take on more work. Through their discussion, they explore different strategies for approaching such situations, emphasizing the importance of empathy, communication, and teamwork.

Key Takeaways:

  1. Empathy is Crucial: Lucie's initial approach lacks empathy and understanding, leading to resistance from Chris. The conversation highlights the importance of managers showing empathy and validating team members' feelings and concerns.
  2. Clear Communication: Effective delegation involves clear and open communication, where expectations are set realistically and discussions about job responsibilities are held transparently.
  3. Team Collaboration: Instead of imposing tasks, inviting team members to co-create solutions can lead to more amicable and productive outcomes. This approach fosters a sense of shared responsibility and problem-solving.
  4. Adapting to Changes: The discussion underscores the need for flexibility in management, especially when unexpected changes occur, such as a team member leaving.

Reflection Prompts for You:

  • Think about a time you had to take on unexpected responsibilities. How did you feel, and how did your manager handle it?
  • Reflect on your current approach to delegation. Are there aspects you could improve to foster better teamwork and less resistance?
  • Consider how you can apply the principles of empathy and collaboration in your daily work interactions to enhance team dynamics.

If you found this episode insightful, don’t forget to subscribe for more discussions on enhancing workplace dynamics. Your feedback is invaluable, so please leave us a review or share your thoughts and experiences related to today's topic.

Questions? Comments? What did we do well? Where should we get better? Suggestions for our next roleplays? 

Let us know! :)

Connect with us here: 

Email: tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

LinkedIn:  
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

21: Strategy - What NOT to say, part 230 Apr 202400:12:06

Even more things NOT to say in hard conversations

In this strategy episode, Chris walks through 12 instinctual communication habits that almost all of us use without realizing it.

And most of the time, it’s not a big deal – but in difficult conversations, it can really make a HUGE difference. Hint – some of them will surprise you:

  1. Ordering
  2. Warning
  3. Moralizing
  4. Advising
  5. Using Logic
  6. Criticizing
  7. Praising
  8. Labeling
  9. Analyzing
  10. Reassuring
  11. Questioning
  12. Avoiding

 Any on that list seems like it shouldn’t get in the way of communication? 

Take a listen to today’s episode and hear why and how they actually get in the way of creating dialogue in high-stress conversations.

Want to stay in the loop?  Did you know there’s a weekly newsletter that also shares specific strategies to walk through specific hard conversations?

Get your copy here

--

Questions? Comments? What did we do well? Where should we get better? Suggestions for our next roleplays? 

Let us know! :)

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

20: How to find confidence in being your authentic self. Interview with Andrea Horton-Meriçli23 Apr 202400:39:23

What does it mean to grow up in different cultural settings?

How do you find your own voice and find the confidence to be yourself?

In this episode, Chris interviews Andrea Horton-Meriçli, Founder of Diversifuse DEI Consulting Services, about her experiences growing up mixed-race in Texas and how, as a first-generation college student, she found confidence in her history and talents to succeed in college and professionally.

Andrea also shares about her journey to overcoming imposter syndrome.

Learn more about Andrea here:

My journey is deeply rooted in my intersectionality as a mixed-race Latina, the daughter of a Mexican immigrant, a military brat, an individual from a low-income background, and the partner of an immigrant. With a career spanning over two decades in the nonprofit sector, I amassed a wealth of experience and expertise in various domains, including K-12 education, adult education, the medical field, career services, workforce development, project management, working with immigrants and refugees, and diversity initiatives. My journey was shaped by the challenges of growing up in a low-income, bi-racial household while navigating the complexities of being a military brat, moving frequently, and adapting to new environments. Growing up, I was passionate about technology and innovation, so I started university by majoring in electrical engineering. As a minority woman in a male-dominated industry, I often felt like I didn't belong. As a first-generation working college student, I didn’t know where to go for help and support. Despite my talents and ambitions, self-doubt crept in, holding me back from fully embracing my potential...and I ended up changing universities and majors. However, deep down, I knew there was more to my story than fear and insecurity. Despite facing systemic barriers and stereotypes, my resilience, determination, and unwavering passion for having my voice and others like mine be heard, propelled me forward. Driven by my lived experiences and a desire to create positive change, I founded Diversifuse, a platform dedicated to fostering diversity and inclusion with a niche for advocating for immigrants and language learners in organizations. Through Diversifuse, I am on a mission to dismantle systemic inequalities, empower underrepresented individuals, and cultivate a culture of belonging and equity in the community at large. My intersectional identity and unique perspective serve as a driving force for change, inspiring others to embrace their own stories, challenge societal norms, and create a more equitable and inclusive world.

Connect with Andrea here:

Email: andrea@diversifuse.com

Website: https://diversifuse.com/

LinkedIn Personal Profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andreahortonmericli/

LinkedIn Company Page: https://www.linkedin.com/company/diversifuse/

Facebook (Diversifuse): https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61551500632190

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/diversifuse/

YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3JWfkOJ2OwudZsQ8iSyc5A Get Diversifused Podcast on ouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Diversifuse/podcasts Get Diversifused Podcast on Spotify: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/andrea79366

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Questions? Comments? What did we do well? Where should we get better? Suggestions for our next roleplays? 

Let us know! :)

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

19: Managing Up Roleplay - Career Conversation with Avoidant Boss16 Apr 202400:22:29

Ever found yourself in a sticky situation with your boss or a colleague where you just couldn't express your needs effectively? 🤔 Tune into our latest episode of "The Art and Science of Difficult Conversations," where we explore practical strategies for managing up and steering tough discussions toward productive outcomes. Don't miss these invaluable insights! 🎧 #Leadership #Communication #Podcast

 Key Takeaways:

  1. Understanding Dynamics: The episode explores the dynamics between a high-performing employee and a busy manager, highlighting the importance of clear communication.
  2. Strategies for Effective Communication: Listeners learn how to manage up by using strategies that include preparation, clarity in conversation, and setting realistic expectations.
  3. Role Play Insights: Through role-play, the hosts demonstrate both ineffective and effective ways to navigate difficult conversations, providing listeners with practical examples.
  4. Emotional Intelligence: The importance of tone, empathy, and understanding in communication is discussed, emphasizing how these factors can defuse potential conflict.
  5. Actionable Tips: The episode concludes with actionable advice for listeners on how to apply these techniques in real-life scenarios to foster better understanding and cooperation.
Optional Reflection Prompts for You:
  1. Reflect on Past Conversations: Think about a recent difficult conversation at work. What would you change about your approach if you could do it over?
  2. Empathy Exercise: Consider a time when your boss or a colleague seemed dismissive. How could understanding their perspective better have changed the outcome?
  3. Future Strategies: What are some specific strategies you can adopt from this podcast to improve your next challenging workplace conversation?

Questions? Comments? What did we do well? Where should we get better? Suggestions for our next roleplays? 

Let us know! :)

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

18: What NOT to say, Part 109 Apr 202400:09:15

Communication is really hard; good dialogue is even harder. 

The essence of good communication and good dialog is being able to say what you want to say and create an environment where the other person is also willing and open to share.

In this episode, Chris walks through common things we all say that actually get in the way of good conversations.

Take a listen and let us know - do you do or say any of these?

 Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

17: Interview with Jack Skeels on His Leadership Journey02 Apr 202400:30:13

Everyone’s leadership journey is different, but have you ever: 

-        Been told you were not a good leader

-        Set out to prove them wrong

-        Realize they were right all along?

That’s Jack Skeels story - he joined us today to talk about his own leadership journey, including one of the hardest parts of being a leader: 

Getting feedback we don’t agree with

 In fact, that was the inspiration behind the book he researched and wrote: Unmanaged: Master the Magic of Creating Empowered and Happy Organizations

Listen to hear his journey and pick up a copy of the book here!

Jack is a two-time Inc. 500 award-winning entrepreneur, consultant, and former management sciences researcher at the think-tank RAND Corporation. A noted author, expert, and speaker, he has been published and featured over 35 times, including Ad Age, Entrepreneur.com, Business Horizons, Wall Street Journal, Training, and many other publications.

 You can follow him here:

Thoughts? Questions? Let us know! We would love to hear from you, your feedback matters to us. 

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

16: Talking to a stubborn parent who needs living assistance (Roleplay) 26 Mar 202400:39:19

In this thought-provoking episode, hosts Chris Wong and Lucie Tesarova delve into the complexities of navigating emotionally charged discussions within family dynamics. Using a role-playing strategy, they explore the difficult conversation about suggesting assisted living to an elderly parent. This episode touches on cultural sensitivities, shows the importance of empathy and validation, and explores strategies for maintaining connection while addressing challenging topics.

Key Takeaways:

  1. Cultural Sensitivity: Understanding and respecting cultural backgrounds is crucial in conversations about elderly care. For instance, in many Asian and European cultures, the idea of assisted living is less common, and family care is preferred.
  2. Approach with Empathy: Demonstrating empathy and concern, rather than dictating solutions, can lead to a more productive dialogue. It's about creating a space where the elderly family member feels heard and valued.
  3. Strategic Listening: Active and strategic listening plays a significant role in understanding the concerns and fears of the elderly. Asking thoughtful questions and really listening to the answers can uncover underlying issues and lead to mutually acceptable solutions.
  4. Maintaining Connection: Keeping the dialogue open and ongoing is essential. Acknowledging that there may not be an immediate solution but being willing to continue the conversation can strengthen familial bonds.

Optional Reflection Prompts:

  1. Reflect on your own experiences: Have you had a similar conversation with a family member about aging or assisted living? What strategies worked for you, and what would you do differently?
  2. Consider the role of culture: How does your cultural background influence your views on elderly care and family dynamics? Share your thoughts and how they might differ from or align with the discussion in this episode.

Thoughts? Questions? Let us know! We would love to hear from you, your feedback matters to us. 

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

S2E8 How to talk about politics at work24 Sep 202401:28:53

Navigating Political Conversations at Work

Politics can seem super divisive.  And really, how do we talk about it in the workplace? 

In this episode,  We talk with Chris, a diversity, inclusion, and belonging expert at Navy Federal Credit Union about the challenges of navigating political conversations in the workplace, particularly during a charged election season.

 Here are some key takeaways from the episode:

  • Should we talk about politics at work?
  • Prioritize Relationships Over Winning
  • Seek Consent and Be Mindful of Boundaries
  • Practice Self-Awareness and Disengagement
  • Focus on Shared Values and Common Ground
  • Lead with Curiosity and Vulnerability

Chris Geggie is a leadership development coach whose passion is helping people discover their authentic voice. Drawing from his experience as a teacher and community organizer, Geggie has coached electoral candidates and business leaders to guide themselves and others toward ethical decision making and the strategic execution of their vision, mission, and goals. He is currently an internal business consultant with Navy Federal Credit Union’s Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging team and lives with his partner and dog in Baltimore, MD.

 

Connect with Chris Geggie here:

Linkedin - Www.LinkedIn.com/in/chrisgeggie/

 

Contact Us

Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

 #difficultconversations #politics #talkingaboutpolitics #howtotalkpoliticsatwork

15: Advanced Listening Skills19 Mar 202400:09:38

There is no shortage of seminars, books, and trainings out there that focus on active listening skills.  But even if you get good at them, what are you even listening for? 

In this episode, Chris walks through just exactly WHAT you should be listening for in hard conversations.  Because, at the end of the day, good listening skills really focus on bringing what's unsaid to the surface. This includes:  

  • underlying emotions
  • the other person's worldview/point of view
  • their values
  • their interests/motivations
  • opportunities to strengthen the relationship  

Listen in to figure out how to take your listening skills to the next level.  

 

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

14: How Knowing Different Personality Styles Can Help You in Your Conversations (Lucie Tesarova with Steven Farber) 12 Mar 202400:37:27

This episode features Steven Farber discussing with Lucie Tesarova the critical role of communication in solving workplace issues and improving personal relationships.

Tune in to learn: 

- how empathy & understanding of the other can help in having better personal and professional conversations

- how introverts and extroverts may communicate differently and what kind of challenges that can create in our conversations 

- why self-acceptance is important for our personal growth, including learning to communicate better

- how video games can be similar to our life stories, and what we can learn from them

And more! 

 

Connect with Steven Farber: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stevenfarber/

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/
Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

 

13: Managing up to a micromanager (Roleplay)05 Mar 202400:21:12

Summary: 

Have you ever had that frustrating experience of working with a boss who keeps criticizing you and micromanaging you? Or, maybe you are a team leader who works with team members that you don’t trust that they can get the job done right, and your 1:1s are not going anywhere, as the team members don’t seem to take any responsibility and the same issues continue to happen? 

Whether you’re a team leader, a team member, or anyone who’s ever found themselves thinking, ‘There has to be a better way to handle this,’ this episode is for you. 

In this episode, we dive into a tense workplace scenario between a micromanaging and critical team lead, Lucie, and Chris, a team member who made a mistake. Both of them are experiencing frustration and miscommunication around job expectations and performance, specifically focusing on a recurring issue with the unfortunate "line number 13."

Through the roleplays and debriefing after, we explore themes of trust, micromanagement, and effective communication strategies in resolving workplace conflicts. The episode concludes with practical steps both parties can take to improve their working relationship and overall team dynamics.

Key Takeaways:

  1. The importance of pausing and reflecting in heated conversations
  2. Strategies for acknowledging and addressing micromanagement
  3. The role of trust and validation in workplace communication
  4. Practical steps for conflict resolution and improving team dynamics

Next steps: 

  • Subscribe to our podcast for more insightful episodes on effective communication.
  • Share your thoughts or your own experiences with difficult conversations on our social media platforms.
  • Check out Chris's course on Difficult conversations! https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/ 

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

PS – did you know we have an upcoming webinar on how to prepare for hard conversations?  Come and leave with practical tools and strategies so you can feel confident about your upcoming difficult conversation.  Save your spot here - https://www.mindfittery.com/difficult-conv-webinar

12: When it is time to call it quits27 Feb 202400:07:46

When is it time to call it quits?

A question we’ve been getting more and more recently is “when is it time to call it quits”?  

And it’s a fair question, because drawing the line in hard conversations is more than just ending emotional outbursts.  It means setting healthy boundaries, recognizing when the conflict is no longer productive, or at worst, noticing when it’s becoming more disrespectful and potentially causing harm.

In today’s episode, Chris walks through two major points:

1. Signs it’s times to end the conversation
2. How to end the conversation well

Typically, if you notice any of these, it means it’s time to end the conversation:

- Personal attacks or disrespect
- Emotionally becoming overwhelmed
- Violation of your core values
- The conversation is going in circles
- Concerns about your emotional or physical safety
- Potentially crossing legal/ethical boundaries

Chris also talks through HOW to end the conversation, including:

- Being clear and direct
- Taking a break
- Seeking a neutral mediator
- Setting ground rules and referring back to them

Have you had to end a hard conversation?  What’s been your strategy of choice? Continue the conversation on our socials or share this episode with your thoughts.

Connect with us here:

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

PS – did you know we have an upcoming webinar on how to prepare for hard conversations?  Come and leave with practical tools and strategies so you can feel confident about your upcoming difficult conversation.  Save your spot here - https://www.mindfittery.com/difficult-conv-webinar

11: Interview by Chris Wong with Mikel Wisler, an award-winning filmmaker and author20 Feb 202400:35:57

In this week's episode, we interview Mikel Wisler, an award-winning filmmaker and author.  He is a big fan of science fiction and helping others find meaning through stories (in all forms).  In this episode, we talk about:

- The vulnerability that comes with putting yourself out there and how to handle feedback/criticism

- How leaders can take their storytelling to the next level to motivate and inspire

- the importance of stories in our lives

And if you listen to the whole thing, you may even hear which actor Chris would want to portray him in a biopic of his life.

 

Connect with Mikel here:

Website: www.mikelwisler.com

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mikelwisler/

Instagram: @mikelwisler

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/
Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

 

Sign up for updates and weekly communication tips here: www.tinyurl.com/leadershippotential

10: Roleplay: How (not) to speak to someone about breaching your trust 13 Feb 202400:27:32
Podcast Summary:

In this rolepay episode of our podcast, we delve into the delicate matter of emotional boundaries and trust within personal and professional relationships. We roleplayed a situation in which Chris shared with a third party something that Lucie shared with him in confidence. Lucie found out about it. Tune in to find out how she addressed it with Chris. 

The first scenario we roleplayed leads to increased conflict and the potential end of a friendship, and another paves the way for understanding, healing, and possibly mending the damaged relationship.

Key Takeaways:
  1. The Impact of Breached Trust: Sharing something in confidence only to have it disclosed can lead to feelings of exposure, hurt, and betrayal, highlighting the importance of respecting emotional boundaries.

  2. Navigating the Aftermath: The episode emphasizes the significance of addressing breaches of trust thoughtfully, showing how different approaches can lead to vastly different outcomes.

  3. Constructive Communication: Through the roleplay, listeners learn valuable strategies for constructive communication, including the importance of calmness, clarity, and empathy in repairing relationships.

  4. Setting and Reaffirming Boundaries: The discussion sheds light on the critical role of setting clear emotional boundaries and the steps one can take to reaffirm or redefine these boundaries after they've been crossed.

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

9: How to ask good questions (Strategy) 06 Feb 202400:11:19

Are questions really that important?    

Yes!    

In fact, asking good questions may be the single best tool you have to get unstuck in hard conversations.  But good, powerful questions are easier said than done. 

In this week's episode, Chris walks through:  

  • The benefits of asking good questions
  • The ingredients of what makes a question powerful
  • Why closed-ended questions may actually be good to use sometimes
  • Why you shouldn't ask too many questions and what to do instead.  

In the episode, Chris also mentions a book "Questions are the Answer".  You can find that book on Amazon here   Next week, we role-play how to approach someone who has crossed an emotional boundary; see you next week!  

 

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

8: How to use your story to empower others: Interview by Chris Wong with Special Guest Heidi Lee30 Jan 202400:45:06

How to use your story to empower others

In this week’s podcast episode, we interview a very dear friend, Heidi Lee. Chris has been friends with her for many years, and Heidi has worked for years in the Boston area as a treatment case manager, harm reduction specialist, and peer support specialist with vulnerable and underserved populations. 

Her motivation? 

She also experienced really difficult situations throughout her life and has learned to use her own experiences with the mental health care system in Massachusetts to help others who also struggle.

It’s not easy to be vulnerable in sharing your own story, let alone sharing the areas you struggled with and the loss you’ve experienced.  But today, she shares: 

-        Her own history of abuse and recovery from mental illness

-        How to find purpose and make meaning

-        How to find power in your own story and use it to have an impact in the world

We’re very grateful for Heidi and her courage to share her story and we look forward to continue seeing her have an incredible impact in the world.

You can follow Heidi at:

Linkedin - https://www.linkedin.com/in/heidi-hyunjin-lee-25566919/

Instagram - @heidi.hj.lee1231

Email Heidi at heidi.hj.lee@gmail.com   If you're interested in learning more about the NAAPIEN that Heidi mentions, it's now named "National Asian American Pacific Islander Mental Health Association," and you can learn more at their website here: https://www.naapimha.org/ 

 

7: Roleplay: How (not) to have a cross-department collaboration 23 Jan 202400:25:55

 

Show Notes for the Podcast Episode:

Have you ever been in a situation where you needed to collaborate on a project with someone outside your department or team? 

It can be either a mutually enjoyable experience or one that you tell your coworkers about with anger and frustration in your voice. 

Join us today for a roleplay podcast episode, where we demonstrate two versions of cross-department collaboration and debrief after each with key lessons on what makes these conversations challenging and what you can change to make conversations and collaborations more productive and successful. 

Introduction:

  • The episode begins with a realistic roleplay of a challenging conversation between two colleagues, Chris and Lucie, addressing workload issues, deadlines, and team dynamics in a high-pressure environment.

Key Topics Discussed:

  1. The Initial Confrontation:

    • Lucie approaches Chris with an urgent request for a slide deck, bio, and pictures for an upcoming recruitment fair, highlighting the importance of meeting tight deadlines.
    • Chris expresses his overwhelming workload and inability to meet the immediate request, leading to a tense exchange.
  2. Stress Factors and Organizational Changes:

    • Discussion of additional stress factors, such as company reorganization and covering for absent colleagues.
    • The conversation sheds light on the impact of organizational changes on individual workloads and team dynamics.
  3. Communication Breakdowns and Pressure:

    • Analysis of how both parties communicated under pressure, including instances of talking over each other and competing over who was more overwhelmed.
  4. Lack of Empathy and Understanding:

    • Insight into how the lack of empathy and understanding can escalate workplace tensions.
    • The conversation pivots to finding a resolution and exploring how each could have approached the situation differently.
  5. Alternative Approaches and Solutions:

    • A second roleplay shows a more empathetic and collaborative approach to the situation.
    • Exploration of alternative solutions, including delegating tasks, repurposing existing materials, and adjusting project quality expectations.
  6. Importance of Active Listening and Collaboration:

    • Emphasis on the significance of active listening, acknowledging each other's challenges, and working collaboratively towards a solution.
    • Discussion on how a change in approach can lead to more productive outcomes and preserve professional relationships.
  7. Long-term Impact on Team Dynamics:

    • Examination of how such interactions can affect long-term team dynamics, trust, and collaboration.
    • Strategies for maintaining a positive and supportive work environment amidst challenges.

 

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

6: How to deal with someone who gets defensive or angry16 Jan 202400:09:33

In this week’s podcast, Chris answers the age-old question:

“How do I deal with a person that gets defensive or gets emotional or angry?”

The good news – there are simple, proven techniques that can help in the moment.

Even better news?

There are two things you can do to prepare so that you can minimize the intensity of that behavior. In this short strategy episode, Chris goes over:

- How to start the conversation off well to minimize the intensity of defensive behaviors or emotional outbursts

- How summaries, when used correctly, can guide the conversation in a specific direction

- How to reframe your mindset around the fear of getting a reflection or summary wrong

What other strategies do you have in hard conversations? Join us back next week when we role-play how to navigate a conversation between departments.

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/
Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

S2E7 How to deal with a parent that bad-mouths your partner17 Sep 202400:50:47

Setting boundaries with our family members might be the most difficult thing for many of us, yet not doing so might be very detrimental to our well-being and other relationships.

Imagine that your parent cannot stand your spouse and is very vocal about it. What do you do in that situation? How do you address it?

Tune in today's episode and see what from we share resonates with you.

 Have you faced that situation in your family? How did you address it? What worked for you, what didn't? Let us know! Let's learn together, have better conversations and better relationships, and ultimately, a better quality of life.

Sign up for the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

Contact Us

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova #difficultconversations #settingboundaries #boundariesinrelationships #relationships #communicationskills #impactfulconversations

5: Interview by Chris Wong with Special Guest Tiffany Teng09 Jan 202400:31:45

Episode Overview:

Have you ever found yourself avoiding tough conversations, whether at work or in personal relationships? Do you want to know how cultural and familial backgrounds shape the way we handle conflicts? How can that play out in your life and what it takes to transform from a conflict-avoider to a confident communicator in difficult situations?

 Join us for another episode of The Art and Science of Difficult Conversations, this time listen to a conversation between Chris Wong and our special guest, Tiffany Teng to learn answers to these questions and. more! 

Tiffany Teng, is a FinTech executive with a rich background that intersects personal growth, cultural influences, and professional development. Listen as Tiffany shares her insightful journey from navigating familial and cultural communication barriers to mastering the art of difficult conversations.

Key Highlights:

  1. Tiffany's Roots and Career Evolution:

    • Background as a child of Asian immigrants and growing up in an Asian church alongside Chris.
    • The transition from studying neuroscience and psychology at Stanford to a business career focusing on consumer decision-making.
  2. Overcoming Cultural Communication Barriers:

    • Discussing the challenges faced due to her family and cultural background in handling difficult conversations.
    • The impact of suppressed emotions and conflict avoidance in her personal and professional life.
  3. Professional Challenges and Growth:

    • Tiffany's early career experiences, including co-founding a startup and managing workplace conflicts.
    • The journey of acquiring conflict mediation certification and leadership training for effective conversation and feedback.
  4. Personal Development Through Therapy:

    • A decade of therapy aiding in personal growth and changing communication styles.
    • Shift from a fixed to a growth mindset and its significance in personal relationships and professional interactions.
  5. Strategies for Difficult Conversations:

    • Emphasis on using "I" statements instead of "you" statements to avoid defensiveness.
    • The role of meditation and mindfulness in managing stress and emotions during conflicts.
    • Adapting communication styles in different cultural contexts, including family and workplace.
  6. Sensitive Topics and Family Dynamics:

    • Insights into handling conversations about race, politics, and racial justice.
    • Tiffany's experiences with changing family communication patterns post-therapy.

Key Takeaways:

  • The importance of understanding and adapting to cultural and familial influences in communication.
  • The transformation from conflict avoidance to effective conflict resolution.
  • The role of self-awareness, therapy, and continuous learning in mastering difficult conversations.

Up Next:

Stay tuned for our next episode, where we'll dive into "How to Respond to Angry Behaviors in Hard Conversations."

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/
Connect with Tiffany Teng: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tiffanyjaneteng 

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

4: Roleplay: How (not) to give a constructive feedback (From manager to a team member)02 Jan 202400:25:52
Show Notes: How (not) to give constructive feedback. 

Are you struggling with giving negative feedback to your team members? Join us for this roleplay episode, and take it as an opportunity to review or learn some tips to make giving constructive feedback better for everyone involved. In the bonus resource to this episode, you will find a summary of key takeaways and a few other coaching prompts to help you prepare for your future constructive feedback sessions. 

In today's roleplay scenario, Lucie, the employee, is confronted by Chris, her manager, about consistent issues with late paperwork submissions and inaccuracies. You will get to experience two versions: one shows how constructive feedback is done in an ineffective way, and the second shows how to do it a bit better. 

We debrief after each version and share with you key takeaways and action steps that you can implement in your future conversations. 

Download a bonus resource here

 Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

 

3: What makes difficult conversations so difficult26 Dec 202300:08:10

Why are difficult conversations so difficult?

In this episode, Chris walks through just what exactly makes difficult conversations so difficult.  Because knowing what makes them difficult can help us put in the right strategies to make them less stressful.  In this episode, Chris walks through:

  1. How the fight/flight/freeze response affects the conversations
  2. Why caring about both the relationship and outcome makes a difference.
  3. How emotions are hard for most people
  4. The importance of feeling prepared

As well as some quick tips around each of these.  

Do these resonate with you?  Is there something else that makes difficult conversations hard for you?

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

2: His Story & Her Story - Why Do They Care About Difficult Conversations So Much? 19 Dec 202300:36:01

Why do Lucie and Chris care about difficult conversations so much?

In this episode, Lucie and Chris each share about why they care about this topic and what it’s meant for them to become more comfortable with difficult conversations. 

Listeners will hear how Chris’ immigrant and refugee parents had a “ignore at all costs” approach to difficult conversations and how he was forced to adapt and become comfortable with hard conversations.

Lucie shares her own immigration story and how her culture’s blunt approach to conversations and own experiences meant that she had to learn how to inject empathy into her difficult conversations.

What is YOUR story or challenge with difficult conversations? Let us know! We would love to hear from you. 

Follow us on social media:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

 

1: How to handle hard family conversations during the holidays12 Dec 202300:20:11

How to handle stressful conversations with family during the holidays?

In this special holiday episode, we delve into the art of navigating challenging conversations at the Thanksgiving table. Through roleplaying scenarios, we explore both the ineffective and more effective ways to handle difficult family discussions.

Key Takeaways:

Roleplaying the Ineffective Way: We simulate tense family dialogues, highlighting common pitfalls such as interrupting, dismissive attitudes, and confrontational behavior. (Topic: gun ownership)

Recognizing Communication Breakdowns: Understanding how ineffective communication can escalate tension and hinder meaningful dialogue, impacting relationships.

Roleplaying the More Effective Way: We demonstrate strategies for effective communication – active listening, empathy, and respectful responses – fostering understanding and connection.

Tips for Productive Conversations: Practical guidance on initiating discussions, setting boundaries, and redirecting topics to maintain a positive atmosphere.

The 'Why' Behind Effective Dialogue: Briefly touching the psychological and emotional impact of respectful communication on family dynamics and relationships.

Conclusion:

By dissecting these roleplaying scenarios, we provide actionable insights into transforming challenging conversations over the holidays into opportunities for connection, understanding, and growth.

Additional Resources:

Connect with Chris Wong: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc/

 

Connect with Lucie Tesarova: 

https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova/

 

#Thanksgiving #Holidays #difficultpeople #DifficultConversations #gunownership 

Welcome to the Podcast! 21 Sep 202300:01:03

Do you love having difficult conversations?

Chances are not so much!? Maybe you even hate having them?

We get it! We didn't love them either! But we decided to get better at them, and now we help our clients gain more ease, clarity and confidence in their own difficult conversations. We believe in growth, and our mission is to help you improve your relationships, communication skills, and, ultimately, your results. Tune in to "The Art and Science of Difficult Conversations" and transform your interactions for the better.

When we communicate better, we live better.

Let's get started! :)

Chris & Lucie

S2/E06: How to trust our instinct - Interview with Emily Aarons10 Sep 202400:44:50

Sometimes, the hardest conversations we need are with ourselves.  

Mainly, how do we find confidence in what we’re doing, even in the face of adversity?  And more so, how do we build supports around us that inspire and move us, rather than pull us down?

 Today, we interview Emily Aarons, a leading educator to spiritual entrepreneurs, renowned energy healer, and business coach.  She shares about her journey and struggles in building a business and the often-difficult conversations that are needed internally to grow and learn.

 We talk about:

-        What it’s like to create a path with no prior example of what that path looks like

-        How to build confidence in our own skills and talents

-        How to learn to listen to our intuition

With over two decades of experience blending spirituality and business, Emily’s mission is to help outstanding practitioners to build a successful and sustainable business. Her dedication to excellence is setting the gold standard to see leadership as a spiritual practice. 

If you’re a budding entrepreneur, a small business owner, or just looking to better trust your own gut instinct, listen to this episode!

 

Connect with Emily here:

Https://emilyaarons.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/emilyaarons/

Podcast - https://emilyaarons.com/podcast/

Email – emily@emilyaarons.com      

 

Contact Us

Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

 

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

05 How to Deal with Employees Resisting Change03 Sep 202400:52:20

In this episode of "The Art and Science of Difficult Conversations," hosts Chris Wong and Lucie Tesarova dive deep into the complex issue of managing resistance to change, especially when it comes to implementing new technologies in the workplace.

Resistance to change is a common challenge in organizations of all sizes. Whether it’s introducing new software, processes, or policies, getting everyone on board can be tough. Chris and Lucie discuss why employees might resist changes, especially technological ones, and explore the underlying psychological factors contributing to this pushback.

Through an engaging conversation, Chris and Lucie share practical strategies for leaders and managers to navigate these tough conversations effectively. They role-play real-life scenarios, offer insightful tips, and discuss best practices for fostering a culture of openness and collaboration. You'll learn how to communicate change effectively, maintain employee morale, and ensure a smoother transition.

Key Takeaways:

  • Understanding the root causes of resistance to technology and change
  • Effective communication strategies for leaders and managers
  • Role-play demonstration on handling employee pushback
  • Balancing empathy with accountability in the workplace
  • Common mistakes managers make and how to avoid them
  • How to get employee buy-in and support during transitions

Who Should Listen:
This episode is perfect for HR professionals, managers, team leaders, and anyone looking to improve their leadership and communication skills. If you're interested in navigating difficult conversations and managing change more effectively, this episode is for you!

Contact Us

Sign up for the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

 

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

04: How to talk about Money and Death27 Aug 202400:39:08

Summary:

You know what’s hard?  Talking about money with your partner or family.

 You know what’s even harder?

Talking about money and estate planning and death.

 With over two decades in the financial services realm, Christopher Hensley's journey has been driven by a singular passion: helping individuals navigate the intricate paths of finance to achieve their life aspirations. His dedication isn't just rooted in numbers and strategies; it's about making genuine connections and empowering people with the knowledge they need for a secure future.

 Today, Christopher joins us to share his tips from decades in the work, how to navigate difficult conversations around finances and death. 

 He truly helps demystify:

 -        How the legal and financial documents seem daunting, but are actually easier than you think

-        The importance of having these conversations in case something happens

-        How to navigate complicated family dynamics so you can honor your family’s legacy

 Christopher's foundation in the industry is robust. He's collaborated with Fortune 500 frontrunners like Merrill Lynch and UBS Financial Services and has made significant contributions to non-profits, notably with MMI-Consumer Credit Counselors Southwest. His credentials, including licenses from FINRA and designations like the Retirement Income Certified Professional® and the Certified Estate and Trust Specialist™, speak volumes about his commitment to professional growth and expertise.

 But beyond the certificates and affiliations, what truly sets Christopher apart is his ability to communicate. For a decade, he's been the voice behind the radio/podcast show “Money Matters” on KPFT Houston, demystifying complex financial concepts for a broad audience. His insights have been sought after by platforms like Wall Street Journal Radio and 1110 KTEK Business Builders Network Radio, and he's provided expert commentary on market trends in renowned publications.

 Christopher's community involvement further underscores his dedication. As the former President of the Houston Midtown Chapter of the Society for Financial Awareness, he's delivered financial literacy seminars across Houston and the Gulf Coast. He's also been an active voice in Houston Money Week since 2008, currently holding a leadership position.

 

What difficulties have you had around these conversations with family?

 Connect with Christopher here:

www.houstonfirstfinancialgroup.com

www.moneymatterspodcast.com 

 Email - christopher.hensley@cambridgesecure.com

 

Contact Us

Sign up for the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

 

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

03: How to Deal with People Who Go Off on Tangents - strategy and roleplay20 Aug 202400:52:39

In this episode of "The Art and Science of Difficult Conversations," Chris and Lucie tackle a common challenge in both professional and personal settings: dealing with tangents during difficult conversations. They explore strategies for keeping conversations on track, maintaining focus, and setting boundaries without dismissing the other person's perspective.

Key Takeaways:

1. Preparation is Key: Start by understanding the goal of the conversation. Preparation helps in staying on track, especially when the other person goes off-topic.

2. Empathy with Boundaries: Acknowledge the other person's feelings and situation, but gently steer the conversation back to the main point. It's about balancing empathy with the need to stay focused.

3. Using Names for Focus: Addressing the person by name can be a powerful tool to regain their attention and refocus the conversation.

4. Setting Ground Rules: For recurring conversations, setting clear boundaries and expectations beforehand can help manage tangents effectively.

5. Handling Emotional Responses: If emotions run high, suggest taking a break to regroup and return to the conversation with a clearer mindset.

Roleplay Demonstrations: Chris and Lucie provide practical examples through roleplay, showing how to handle tangents in both professional and personal scenarios

#DifficultConversations #CommunicationSkills #Podcast #ConflictResolution #Focus #empathy

How do you manage these situations with colleagues, friends, or family? Leave us a comment, email, or message with your thoughts and questions!

Contact Us

Sign up for the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

 

02: Finding the courage to speak up in high stakes meetings13 Aug 202400:46:12

Title: Finding the courage to speak up in high stakes meetings

Summary:

Conflict in high stakes meetings is inevitable.  Whether it's a board meeting, a roundtable discussion, or a workgroup tasked with solving complex issues, the mix of opinions will always lead to debate.  

 When done well, it can spark new ideas and create an inclusive process where people feel invested in the outcome.  Done poorly, you risk alienating everyone in the meeting.  

But how do you find the courage to speak up in these types of meetings?  Especially if you're a newer person or maybe even underrepresented, so you're not feeling confident in voicing your opinion?

In our first interview of season 2, we interviewed Elise Woodworth, president of Woodworth Enterprises. She helps nonprofits, and specifically their boards, reach their full potential.

Elise talks about:

  • The power of questions to frame the conversation
  • How to find the courage to speak up as an underrepresented person in the meeting
  • The importance of preparing for difficult meetings
  • Why nonprofits and their board structure doesn't always encourage open discussion of issues.

As a best-selling author Elise made a name for herself in the world of nonprofit management. With her book "Business Not Battle for Nonprofit Boards" as a guide, she has helped many organizations thrive. Elise's expertise in leadership, governance, and team building shines through in her frequent speaking engagements. Her role as a member of the Virginia Military Institute’s Foundation’s Board of Trustees and as a volunteer with other organizations further showcase her commitment to service and excellence, making her the perfect choice for your next event.

Elise is a former US Air Force Logistics Officer with an MBA from Capella University and a Bachelor of Science in Biology from VMI. With her unique blend of military experience and business acumen, Elise delivers powerful messages that are sure to leave a lasting impact on your audience.

Let us know what you think – What other strategies have you used to speak up in high stakes meetings?

 Resources

Elise's website: www.elisewoodworth.com

Elise's Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elisewoodworth/

Get her book ["Business, not Battle"] here: https://a.co/d/7AbkEov

Info about Mastering Difficult Conversations Course

 

Contact Us

 Instagram

Youtube

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

 

 

 

How to deal with a high performer who got promoted and is now slacking12 Nov 202400:44:10

What To Do When a High Performer Slacks After a Promotion?

Today’s episode is a deep dive into the complexities of leadership. Chris and Lucie tackle a challenging scenario where a top performer begins to drop the ball after a recent promotion. They discuss ways to understand underlying issues—whether insecurity, new role challenges, or overconfidence—and provide practical guidance for supporting employees while upholding performance standards.

Topics Discussed:

  • Identifying causes behind declining performance
  • Coaching strategies for new role adaptation
  • Balancing support with accountability
  • Roleplay: Manager-employee discussion

Any other ideas, what has worked for you? Let us know!

Contact Us
Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

How to prepare for difficult conversations webinar (and the checklist) https://bit.ly/TASWeb01

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos
Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Family Conversations That Can Change Your Life - Interview with Becky Ellis05 Nov 202400:49:15

Whether you’re interested in understanding family dynamics, navigating generational trauma, or fostering connection through meaningful conversations, this episode offers powerful insights and practical takeaways.

Today’s special guest is Becky Ellis, author of her debut memoir, Little Avalanches. In our conversation, Becky shares how tough yet healing discussions with her father, a WWII veteran, transformed her life. We explore what made these conversations both challenging and healing, and how empathy emerged through deeper understanding. Join us as we dive into themes of vulnerability, authenticity, courage, and the healing impact that difficult conversations can have.

About Becky:
Becky Ellis is a Timberwolf Pup. The daughter of a highly decorated World War II combat sergeant, she is a veteran of a war fought at home. She earned a BA in English Literature at UC Berkeley and has over twenty years of experience in the publishing industry. Her writing has appeared in Psychology Today, Northwest Review, The Ethel, Best Small Fictions, and The Rudder. She teaches writing in Portland, Oregon, where she lives, plays, and has raised three daughters. Little Avalanches is her debut memoir. You can find more about her at beckyellis.net

Connect with Becky:
Website: beckyellis.net
Instagram: @beckyellisauthor
Facebook: becky.ellis.9081
Linkedin: becky-ellis
YouTube: @beckyellisauthor
Newsletter: https://beckyellis.net/connect-1

Connect with us:
Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com
Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc
Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Difficult Conversations Newsletter

Want more updates on how to handle difficult conversations? Grab your weekly copy here: www.tinyurl.com/leadershippotential

Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

Navigating Holiday Decisions: Whose Family Do We Spend It With? #difficultconversations29 Oct 202400:44:08

Navigating Holiday Decisions: Whose Family Do We Spend It With?

In today’s episode, Chris and Lucie dive into a common holiday dilemma many couples face: deciding whose family to spend holidays with. They explore the complexities of family dynamics, travel, and emotions, offering strategies for managing these conversations without compromising relationships. They roleplay a discussion between a married couple working through holiday plans, highlighting how empathy, emotional intelligence, and creative problem-solving can lead to more harmonious decisions.

Key Takeaways:

  • Setting feeling-based goals for the holidays
  • Balancing competing family dynamics and expectations
  • Navigating family guilt and boundary-setting
  • The importance of creative problem-solving in relationships

Have you faced a similar situation? How do you navigate holiday plans with family? Share your thoughts in the comments, and don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave us a review!

Difficult Conversations Newsletter

Want more updates on how to handle difficult conversations?  Grab your weekly copy here: www.tinyurl.com/leadershippotential

 Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

 

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

Is there a such thing as too much communication?22 Oct 202400:54:24

We love communication here at the Art and Science of Difficult Conversations.  In fact, that’s our tagline, “Communicate better, live better”.  But in the pursuit of more open and transparent communication, does the pendulum swing too far in the opposite direction?  Are there times when we don’t need to communicate about a topic?

 That’s our focus today, when we have a lively dialogue with Ahad just about that topic, are there times we should hold off on communicating? 

 Ahad is originally from Pakistan and currently lives in the Netherlands as a data consultant working with organizations to get more intentional and persuasive with their data to make decisions.  He also hosts his own podcast, The Weekly Vasl.

 Follow Ahad here:

 

Difficult Conversations Newsletter

Want more updates on how to handle difficult conversations?  Grab your weekly copy here: www.tinyurl.com/leadershippotential

 

Check out the Mastering Difficult Conversations Course https://leadershippotential.teachable.com/p/mastering-difficult-conversations-how-to

Instagram - http://www.instagram.com/tas.difficultconvos

Email – tas.difficultconversations@gmail.com

Chris – www.linkedin.com/in/chriswonglmhc

Lucie – www.linkedin.com/in/lucietesarova

 

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