Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast The Adult Chair Podcast with Michelle Chalfant
| Titre | Date | Durée | |
|---|---|---|---|
| 488: Are Your Angels and Guides Trying to Reach You? | 11 Dec 2025 | 00:30:33 | |
Today, I'm diving into a topic that has touched so many of you and continues to show up in my own life in the most surprising, beautiful ways. We're exploring the signs, synchronicities, and gentle nudges from the universe that remind us we're never walking this path alone. From repeating numbers to feathers, birds, coins, and even unexpected phrases from strangers, signs are everywhere when we slow down enough to notice them. Whether you've been seeing 11:11 on the clock, finding pennies in random places, or simply sensing that something bigger is guiding you, this episode will help you understand how your angels, guides, and loved ones communicate with you and how to trust the messages already showing up around you. In this episode, I share:
Resources from this Episode: The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE! https://courses.theadultchair.com/the-adult-chair-book Live the work. Feel the change. JOIN THE ADULT CHAIR COLLECTIVE: https://michellechalfant.com/collective
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 487: Reclaiming the You Beneath the Conditioning with Anjie Hipple (Part II) | 04 Dec 2025 | 01:15:06 | |
In this powerful follow-up conversation, I welcome Anjie Hipple back to go even deeper into subconscious healing, energetic transformation, and spiritual awakening. Together, we explore how limiting beliefs form, how to clear them, and how to access the higher self for lasting freedom. Anjie shares how repressed emotions and old subconscious "commands" shape our lives until we learn to reprogram them. Anjie also channels Judah and Mary Magdalene, offering wisdom about the rising consciousness on the planet, inner peace amid global change, and the balance of the divine feminine and masculine within each of us. In this episode, you'll hear insights on:
Anjie also shares her guided system, Judah Treats, designed to help reprogram the subconscious in partnership with the higher self.
Resources from this Episode: Anjie's Website: The Judah Channel - With Anjie Hipple Follow Anjie on Instagram: @thejudahchannel Judah Treats Program: Judah TREATS The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE!
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 478: I Swallowed a Screwdriver | 02 Oct 2025 | 00:36:23 | |
Yes, you read that right. In this episode, I share a very real and very unexpected story about what happened when I accidentally swallowed a dental tool, and how I used the Adult Chair model to navigate nine days of fear, anxiety, and uncertainty. What could have been a terrifying and overwhelming experience became a powerful opportunity for me to practice exactly what I teach: grounding, regulating my nervous system, and staying connected to myself no matter what was happening around me. In this episode, I open up about:
This story isn't just about an unusual accident. It's about how we can move from fear to empowerment, from victim to adult, and from disconnection back to our true selves. Resources from this Episode: The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE! Small Group Coaching is Back! Join us beginning October 7th: michellechalfant.com/octoberlive
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 391: 5 Ways To Live From Your True Self | 02 Nov 2023 | 00:21:16 | |
We all have a "true self" – the essence of who we were before the world told us who to be.
We're born with this essence, but over time, we start reacting to the world around us and create a false self out of our wounds, our experiences and our attempts to get our needs met.
The false self isn't bad, but it isn't who we really are – and a lot of the challenges we experience in life, like anxiety and depression, come from living out of alignment with our true self.
Any sort of healing work must begin with cracking open the false self and discovering who we really are.
This all might sound very philosophical, but the good news is that accessing our true selves is shockingly practical.
By using simple tools that we all have access to, we can begin to reconnect with who we really are and live with the peace, balance, happiness and fulfillment that comes from showing up authentically in the world.
In this episode, I'm giving you five simple ways to start living more from your true self. These are all tools that are totally free and available right now, wherever you are!
Listen to discover:
This is a process, but make sure you're taking time to notice even the little wins. As you experiment with these tools, really sit with that wonderful feeling of rediscovering a tiny piece of yourself. Start paying attention and validating yourself for who you really are.
Over time, I think you're going to be really surprised (in a lovely way) when you begin to not only rediscover aspects of your true self, but also start claiming those aspects and living from that place more each day.
"Some of us have a much thicker layer of the false self, and some of us have a thinner layer of the false self. The good news is [that] anyone can learn how to penetrate that false self and rediscover and live from their true self." - Michelle Chalfant
"Getting in touch with our emotions is such a magical thing." - Michelle Chalfant
"We have a lot more emotions than happy, sad, mad, ashamed and glad." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we put ourselves first and practice what we need as far as taking care of ourselves, it's really, really healthy." - Michelle Chalfant
"Self-care is tuning in and asking, 'What do I need right now in order to make myself feel more comfortable, safe, relaxed and de-stressed?'" - Michelle Chalfant
"Self-care activities will promote and help with self-love and self-worth." - Michelle Chalfant
"Breathwork takes you deeper into yourself. It can truly crack you open and help you to get in touch with some emotions that have been trapped or stuck." - Michelle Chalfant
"Journaling takes you on a journey to the depths of your soul." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Join the 30-Day Journaling Challenge https://theadultchair.com/30days
Share the Love - Review The Adult Chair® Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adult-chair/id941317634
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 390: Understanding Psychedelics with Matt Zemon | 26 Oct 2023 | 00:54:14 | |
Everyone seems to have an opinion about psychedelics these days.
Doctors and therapists see them as potential treatments for things like anxiety, depression and PTSD. Spiritual communities believe they open us up to the divine. Politicians debate whether they should be legal or illegal.
I have to admit that when I first heard people talking about them, I was scared.
I'm not a big fan of substance use of any kind, and the idea of a "drug" becoming mainstream concerned me.
But when some respected psychologists and colleagues of mine started talking about the healing power of psychedelics — people who were far from the 1960s "Summer of Love" stereotype — I knew the topic at least deserved my honest research.
As I dug deeper into the science behind psychedelics and understood how they worked in the mind, I began to realize they weren't about escaping but about going deeper into oneself by quieting the ego and opening the door to new parts of our consciousness.
But, I wanted to make sure my opinion was backed up by accurate, science-based, factual research. And there are few people who I've found better informed on this topic than Matt Zemon.
Matt was once a fellow skeptic like me who also became convinced through research and experience that psychedelics can play a positive role in therapeutic and medical settings.
He is one of the most grounded, scientific voices I've heard on this topic — perfect for anyone who simply wants to learn more and see what you think for yourself — and I am thrilled to have him share his wealth of knowledge in this episode.
Listen to discover:
The choice to have a psychedelic experience is very personal, and I would never tell someone they should or should not try a powerful substance like these.
But I do think we should all do our due diligence to research new breakthroughs in healing with an open mind — which I hope this episode helps you do.
Because whether you get there through a psychedelic or not, allowing yourself to see new perspectives and change your mind is how you grow as a human…and that's always a path worth pursuing.
"In that first six- or seven-hour [psychedelic] journey, the entire way I look and interact with the world shifted." - Matt Zemon
"Physically, these substances are relatively safe." - Matt Zemon
"Not all psychedelics are the same, and you don't want to be on certain medications and taking a psychedelic." - Matt Zemon
"The psychedelic process can help us remember a way that we used to think, maybe before we had adopted those behaviors...and from that rememberance, we can then start to take the steps to change our life." - Matt Zemon
"It's not so much that [psychedelics are] a cure...they're really catalysts for change." - Matt Zemon
"It's not a magic pill. None of them are a magic pill." - Michelle Chalfant
"I felt like I was sitting with God each and every time. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever done." - Michelle Chalfant
"The most important thing was the integration. What do you do after you've had this experience and then how do you integrate that into your life?" - Michelle Chalfant
"In the psychedelic experience, a few things are going to happen. Your default mode network...is going to quiet down...Neurons fire together that haven't fired together in a long time...In this process, it's common that you will then feel connected to all things and all people. You'll feel loved. You'll feel enough. And that is, in my opinion, the reclaiming of your true self." - Matt Zemon
"When you know you're enough and you know you're loved, you're starting to take away the masks you've put on and have been put on you." - Matt Zemon
LINKS & RESOURCES
Join the 30-Day Journaling Challenge https://theadultchair.com/30days
Tanasi Use code ADULT to get 25% off your first order
Matt Zemon Website
"Psychedelics for Everyone" (Matt Zemon Book) https://www.amazon.com/Psychedelics-Everyone-Beginners-Depression-Consciousness/dp/B0BCS7NM9H
Matt Zemon Instagram https://www.instagram.com/matt.zemon/
"How to Change Your Mind" Book https://www.amazon.com/Change-Your-Mind-Consciousness-Transcendence/dp/0735224153
Spirit Pharmacist Psychedelic Consultations/Education https://www.spiritpharmacist.com/
"A Really Good Day" Book https://www.amazon.com/Really-Good-Day-Microdosing-Difference-ebook/dp/B01FPH0IUO/
Safe Drug Testing
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 389: Steps for Working Through a Trigger with Angela Johnson | 19 Oct 2023 | 00:43:18 | |
Triggers are a gift.
Yes, you heard that right (and if you've been here for a while, you've heard me say it before) – I LOVE being triggered!
That's not to say it's fun being triggered, but working with triggers has led to some of the most transformational moments of my life.
See, triggers reveal unknown, unconscious beliefs we hold about ourselves – limiting beliefs that cause us pain and hold back in life.
When these beliefs rise to the surface in the form of a trigger, we get the beautiful opportunity to work with them and transform them…not only healing the trigger but helping us get unstuck and change our lives.
One of my Adult Chair® Coaches, Angela, recently had an experience working with a trigger that was so transformational that even she has jumped on the "triggers are a gift" bandwagon.
A tiff with her husband led to a HUGE moment of self-discovery and deeper connection in their relationship, thanks to the trigger tools Angela learned through The Adult Chair®.
I was so proud of the work she did that I invited her to come on the show and share exactly how she took ownership of the trigger (instead of blaming her husband) and then worked with the trigger to discover and heal the surprising belief underneath it — one she would have never recognized without the trigger
Listen to discover:
When we work on our triggers, it is true freedom.
We not only heal the limiting beliefs that hold us back but also find that we get triggered less with time.
This is one of my favorite conversations because it shows this work in action and breaks it down for you in a powerful way. You will discover exactly how triggers work through the lens of The Adult Chair, how to stay regulated and grounded next time you're triggered and steps to work through and heal your triggers for good.
"When we work with ourselves and work on our own healing of our old wounds…it affects so many people around us." - Michelle Chalfant
"Like you said, triggers are a gift. You say it. I don't want it to be true. But I'm learning that it is." - Angela Johnson
"[Triggers] are a gift...You will learn something about a part of you that's been buried for a very long time. And it is an opportunity to look at that and actually transform and bring that part into the light, and then it doesn't trigger you anymore." - Michelle Chalfant
"What we don't understand about this work sometimes, because it feels scary, is that on the other side of it is freedom." - Angela Johnson
"I've lived in that space of letting [triggers] disrupt my life and relationships for long enough that I just don't want to live that way anymore." - Angela Johnson
"When we're in our Adult Chair...we remember that life is a choice, and everything in life is a choice. And we get to choose, "Do I want to stay in victim seat?" or, "Do I want to reach over and be in my empowerment seat?'" - Michelle Chalfant
"Our perspective when we're triggered shrinks way down...what we want to do is broaden your perspective, and then you have all these different choices and options." - Michelle Chalfant
"In the Adult, we live in the moment. We don't drag things from the past into the moment." - Michelle Chalfant
"Freedom is not a quick little pill. It does take a little bit of work. But it's long lasting. This is not a band-aid approach." - Michelle Chalfant
"You don't get activated the same way after you do that work. That's the miracle." - Angela Johnson
LINKS & RESOURCES
Angela Johnson Website https://openhandscoaching.com/ Use code TRIGGER for $25 off a session
Find an Adult Chair® Coach https://theadultchair.com/coaches/
Join the 30-Day Journaling Challenge https://theadultchair.com/30days
Tanasi Code ADULT to get 25% off your first order
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
| |||
| 388: Human Design with Emma Dunwoody | 12 Oct 2023 | 00:41:09 | |
Do you ever wonder why you do what you do…and if it's just you who does it?
Your gifts, your life's mission, how much energy you have, what you need in relationships, how you view money – these are all unique to you.
And according to Human Design, you are the way you are for a special reason.
Unlike personality typing systems based on mental or behavioral patterns, Human Design is a system based on energy and what was going on in the universe when you were born. Though there are five main "types" within Human Design, it's a very dynamic system that will help you understand what makes you you and what you need to thrive.
I've been hearing tons of buzz about Human Design recently, and in this episode, I talk with Human Design coach (and overall delightful human), Emma Dunwoody, about what Human Design is and how it can help us better embrace our true selves.
Not only does Emma answer all my questions about Human Design, but she also helped me decode my chart, and let me tell you – I felt so seen, validated and free to be myself once I understood I'm exactly who I'm meant to be (and you are too!).
Listen to discover:
As you know from The Adult Chair®, we are all a kaleidoscope of parts, talents and experiences.
Human Design is a fun, insightful tool to help us understand a little bit more about who we are — not to put us in a box but to give us permission to embrace and be our true selves.
Because all those things that only you do? They make you uniquely lovable YOU, and the world wouldn't be the same without you.
"With Human Design, we don't go via the mind. We actually go via the energy…It gives us this energetic blueprint. I love to think of it as a treasure map to our authenticity." - Emma Dunwoody
"You don't go into future with this at all. It really is just about who I am today." - Michelle Chalfant
"So many people spend all this time trying to change themselves...With Human Design, it ultimately gives you a permission slip to be you." - Emma Dunwoody
"We think we need to become who other people tell us that we should become...but with Human Design, you really help people to touch their true self." - Michelle Chalfant
"Human Design teaches us that there are actually two different types of burnout...but what we don't talk about is this 'functional burnout.'" - Emma Dunwoody
"There's so many ways that Human Design can really amplify and improve relationships." - Emma Dunwoody
"Actually, what money is all about is being in alignment to your authenticity…When we are free to be ourselves, then we can't help but make money." - Emma Dunwoody
"Our profile really helps us understand how we do life, what people want from us, how we learn." - Emma Dunwoody
"Human Design is basically the science of being unique." - Emma Dunwoody
LINKS & RESOURCES
Emma Dunwoody Website (Get a Free Human Design Chart)
"The Human Design Podcast" (Emma Dunwoody Podcast) https://www.emmadunwoody.com/the-human-design-podcast
Emma Dunwoody Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the_human_design_coach/
Tanasi Code ADULT to get 25% off your first order
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 387: How To Build Trust in Your Relationship | 05 Oct 2023 | 00:22:00 | |
When we think of trust in a relationship, most of us think of broken trust and big betrayals – things like infidelity, addiction and secrets.
But true trust is about the small actions that we take every day. Trust isn't something we have by default unless it's broken; it's something we have to build.
With every interaction, we're either building or whittling away trust – and sometimes the things that break trust are so subtle, we don't even know we're doing them!
In this episode, I'm giving you six ways to build trust so you can grow your relationship with your partner. These are small, simple actions, but they require awareness, intention and being in your Adult Chair to do consistently.
If you want a long-lasting, deeper connection with your partner, this episode is a must listen!
Listen to discover:
Without trust, we can't have healthy, connected relationships. Trust is an energetic bond that creates safety and allows us to open up, be vulnerable and grow together.
The good news is that it's not about perfection. All of us – including myself – don't get these right all the time.
What's important is what we do when we mess up.
Honesty, presence and the ability to own our mistakes are the ways we as imperfect humans create deep bonds with other imperfect humans and the key to getting the love you want – not the perfect fairy tale, but a beautiful journey of learning and growing together.
"Trust is one of the essential components to a healthy, committed relationship." - Michelle Chalfant
"If we're going to speak something and promise something to our partner, we want to make sure that we are able to line up behind what we're saying." - Michelle Chalfant
"If you are going to speak something into existence, you have to speak it with your full energy and with you behind it…Your actions need to match your words." - Michelle Chalfant
"Owning it does not mean that you're a bad person. You're a human person, and mistakes are gonna happen." - Michelle Chalfant
"If you want to build trust and you're in a committed relationship, apologizing is powerful. It helps to build a connection." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we have important people in our lives, we need to put the phone down, not look at the television, not get distracted by the dog or the cat or the animal in your house. We want to make sure that we're prioritizing our person and giving them our full attention." - Michelle Chalfant
"We need to give our person eye contact when we're listening. Because then they're going to feel seen and they're gonna feel heard, they feel important." - Michelle Chalfant
"You can't put the relationship on the back burner and your person on the back burner and expect [the relationship] to grow and flourish." - Michelle Chalfant
"If you've got friends that are...acting in a way that's disrespectful to your partner, it's your job to defend your partner." - Michelle Chalfant
"Even if the truth hurts, it's better than lying." - Michelle Chalfant
"It feels so good to know that your person has you and you've got them. That's that bond of trust. Trust is like this energetic bond that we form with our partner." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
DOORS OPEN: "The Relationship Reset" Course https://resources.michellechalfant.com/relationships/
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 386: How To Clear Generational Trauma with Emily Blefeld | 28 Sep 2023 | 00:48:29 | |
For millennia, cultures around the globe have known that there's more to us than meets the eye and that our family trees really are a map to ourselves — an energetic portrait of our lives.
Today, epigenetics has proven that what our ancestors experienced can imprint on our genes and impact our lives today in unexpected ways.
That depression, anxiety, stress or limiting belief? It might be from long ago.
And the field of psychology is finally catching up with this.
A new methodology I just discovered (and got the chance to try as a client) is called Family Constellation work.
In this method, we find unconscious experiences and beliefs that we're carrying from our ancestors — including those who we never knew — and work to transform them through awareness and compassion.
On the podcast this week, I talked with my Family Constellation practitioner, Emily Blefeld, about what Family Constellation work is, how our family history affects our lives today and how we can clear blocks and dismantle generational cycles by being bold and brave enough to look at what happened before we were even here.
It's not that different from what we do with parts work in The Adult Chair®, except instead of working with parts of ourselves we're working with parts of our family tree! It's SO freaking cool!
Listen to discover:
The cool thing about epigenetics is that it describes a tendency, not a fate. These experiences don't change our DNA; they change the way our genes express themselves.
That means we get a choice in how these generational traumas will manifest in our lives.
We don't have to agree with the beliefs and experiences of our ancestors. We can look them in the face and decide they stop with us.
And there's no transformation more powerful than that – for ourselves and generations to come.
"We are victim to our lineage." - Michelle Chalfant
"What's unconscious will continue to permeate our lives until it's made conscious." - Emily Blefeld
"We actually carry the victims and the perpetrators in our inherited lineage." - Emily Blefeld
"[Family Constellation work] is predominantly a therapy that looks at the system that we walk around with." - Emily Blefeld
"Constellation work is less interested in what is causing the symptom, and they're more interested in who is the symptom." - Emily Blefeld
"I like to think of it as a family soul on some level." - Emily Blefeld
"There's so much more to us than meets the eye." - Michelle Chalfant
"There are so many different ways to clear our blocks. There's so many different ways to relieve anxiety, depression, feeling not good enough, our inner fraud, all of those things." - Michelle Chalfant
"You'll feel the generations behind heal and the generations following." - Emily Blefeld
"What an awesome thing to hear as a parent, your child thanking you for doing your work. Because it can stop with you." - Emily Blefeld
LINKS & RESOURCES
Emily Blefeld Website https://seeingwithyourheart.com/
FREE MASTERCLASS: How To Heal Your Relationship To Get the Love You Want https://theadultchair.com/healing
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 385: Changing Your Relationships Through Your Primal Question with Mike Foster | 21 Sep 2023 | 00:49:02 | |
What if everything you do in your life is actually driven by one question – a question that is unconscious to you but acts as the command center for how you show up in the world?
That question is what Mike Foster calls your "primal question," and let me tell you, when I discovered mine, it was like my whole life made sense.
Mike developed The Seven Primal Questions system based on his research and work as a coach.
The idea is that we all have a question – like, "Am I safe?" or, "Am I loved?" – that we didn't get answered in childhood and that we continue to ask as adults.
When the answer to this question is "yes," we feel good and become our best selves.
When it's "no," we start scrambling. Our emotional reactions, compulsions, unhelpful behaviors and survival strategies (things like perfectionism and people pleasing) are all attempts to get this question answered in the way we want.
The cool thing? When we understand our primal question and the question of our loved ones, we can change everything about our relationships by healing our wounds, connecting to our gifts and intentionally answering each others' question with a "yes!"
I LOVE this system, and I'm thrilled to have Mike on this show giving us a crash course in it as he breaks down the seven questions, their corresponding "primal truths" and "primal gifts" and how these questions can show up in our lives in different ways.
Listen to discover:
I have a feeling you'll have some lightbulb moments during this show. I also have a link below to help you find your primal question if you're having trouble figuring it out.
This tool is a GAME CHANGER for more consciously relating to ourselves and others, and I'm thrilled to share it with you! It gets down to the core of what makes us tick and shows us how to love ourselves and the people in our life better…and who doesn't want that?
"In our early childhood, we get imprinted with a primal question…The primal question just represents our highest...emotional need." - Mike Foster
"'Am I safe?' is really about survival…where security is really about, 'Am I resourced appropriately to be able to protect myself and sustain myself?'" - Mike Foster
"[That's] what children do, we perceive the world we're in and then we make conclusions about it." - Mike Foster
"The other side of the question is what I call your primal gift, and it's this superpower that every question has." - Mike Foster
"[During the first six years of life] we don't have discernment...we take it on as, 'It's my fault. I did something wrong.'" - Michelle Chalfant
"When we start attuning to our team members' primal question, we can really become a very effective leader with them." - Mike Foster
"What we need the most is what we want to give away to others." - Mike Foster
"Under every behavior is an emotional or feeling driving that behavior. But under every emotion and feeling is an unmet need driving that emotion or feeling." - Mike Foster
"A question being imprinted by trauma is just gonna carry a lot more weight to it than a question just imprinted through confusion." - Mike Foster
"I just see this as such an empowering tool that can help any relationship." - Michelle Chalfant
"I need to be really aware of how my question is showing up in my life." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Mike Foster Website
Seven Primal Questions Assessment https://mikefostercoaching.outgrow.us/mikefostercoaching-2
"The Seven Primal Questions" (Mike Foster Book) https://shop.mikefoster.tv/products/seven-primal-questions-book
Mike Foster Instagram https://www.instagram.com/mikefoster2000/
FREE DOWNLOAD: 5 Healthy Relationship Myths https://theadultchair.com/myths
Green Chef https://www.greenchef.com/60adult Use code 60ADULT for 60% off + free shipping
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 384: Grieving Gracefully with Kris Carr | 14 Sep 2023 | 00:50:15 | |
Grief is a messy, complicated emotion, and very few of us know what to do with it.
We don't want to (or know how to) feel it, and when we're around others who are grieving, most of us freeze.
We feel uncomfortable, so we say nothing or say the wrong thing or stay away, all of which just adds to the pain.
That was me in my 20s and 30s. But when I lost my father, I could no longer avoid grief. He taught me how to grieve…and I found that grief, as painful as it was, connected me to the deeper parts of my soul and made me a more whole-hearted person.
In this episode, I was fortunate to connect with a new soul sister, Kris Carr, about her own journey with grief following the loss of her father.
She experienced a lot of loss — including 20 years of living with Stage 4 cancer — but like me, she had spent her life shoving grief down until her dad passed away.
As she walked with him from diagnosis until his death, she experienced heartbreaking moments, precious moments, joyful moments and spiritual moments that taught her more about being human and opened her up to life.
We talk about how grief can show up in many different ways (not just death), what happens in our bodies when we don't process it, how to support each other through this universal human experience and how to find joy even in a world where pain is part of our reality.
Listen to discover:
This conversation is raw, real and beautiful — it's wisdom earned by being in the trenches, and I hope it helps you get a little more comfortable with the discomfort of grief.
There is no formula for grief. It's something we simply have to be there with.
And when we learn to be there with each other and hold space for it, it can become a sacred moment of deeper connection to ourselves and to each other.
"Grief is such a touchy topic, and sometimes it can be hard to even approach the idea of learning more about it." - Kris Carr
"In many ways, grief is a master healer." - Kris Carr
"I couldn't hold [grief] in any longer and expect to be whole." - Kris Carr
"We don't want to feel [grief]. We don't want to go into the negative emotion zone. If emotions are on that spectrum of love to fear, we don't want to go on that side of the spectrum at all. And grief is sitting right there glaring at all of us." - Michelle Chalfant
"None of us are going to get out this life scratch free and stain resistant." - Kris Carr
"I want to welcome all the parts of me and all the emotions to the table." - Kris Carr
"I don't think the [stages of grief] were ever intended to be linear." - Kris Carr
"There's nothing you can do to make my pain go away. So, it's not your responsibility to fix it. It's your responsibility to be present." - Kris Carr
"There's nothing anybody can say or do to make the grief go away...but showing up with presence is one the best things we can do...As a human being, to feel witnessed is such a healing experience for us." - Michelle Chalfant
"Not only are [our emotions] information, but they're energy. [Crying] is just letting that energy out." - Kris Carr
"While you have the chance to be alive, how can you live as fully as possible, even though you've experienced enormous heartache?" - Kris Carr
LINKS & RESOURCES
Kris Carr Website
"I'm Not a Mourning Person" (Kris Carr Book) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1401970060
FREE DOWNLOAD: 5 Healthy Relationship Myths https://theadultchair.com/myths
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 383: How To Make Peace With Your Past | 07 Sep 2023 | 00:24:39 | |
You're here today, doing the work, living from your Adult Chair, becoming who you want to become.
It feels really good. But as we live and grow and transform, it can sometimes bring up negative feelings about our past.
Whether we made mistakes, missed opportunities, were hurt by someone or experienced a life-altering loss, every one of us has something about our past we wish we could change.
Regret can cut deep – into our very souls – and bring a lot of pain, shame and blame with it.
But whenever we live in regret, it causes us to miss another opportunity: the chance to make the most of the moment we have right now. In this show, I'm giving you three common reasons we get stuck in the past and six ways to make peace with your past and start living in the present moment. You will gain a new perspective on your past and learn to reframe it so you can rewire your brain to live without regret. Listen to discover:
Remember, today will soon become your past. Will you look back and wish you hadn't spent it stuck in regret? Or will you make the most of the moment and use the power you have right now to be who you want to be today?
The present moment is such a powerful reality to live in.
It's here that we find peace and joy. It's here that we have the ability to make this moment one we won't regret.
"The decision that we made in that moment, I don't care how old you were…the person that we were in that moment, we were showing up the very, very best that we could." - Michelle Chalfant
"97% of the time, our assumptions are incorrect." - Michelle Chalfant
"Things that happened in our past, no matter if it's a death or someone has done something to us or we made mistakes, it can be difficult to move on, but it's possible." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we live in the moment, it's a much different reality. It's almost as if the world opens up." - Michelle Chalfant
"Living in the past is like having an anchor tied around our waist trying to move forward." - Michelle Chalfant
"What I'm giving you today are ways to move you forward into the moment." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we don't feel our emotions around something, guess what? It keeps us stuck." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we block our emotions, we're blocking ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant
"Forgiveness releases the hold that the past has on you." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we get in the habit of going back and beating up on ourselves or being mad about someone else…what we do is we form these neural pathways, and they are not healthy. It's like we set the roadmap in our brains to go back and beat up on self." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Podcast #381: Summer Series: How To Get Rid of Negative Emotions https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/381/
A Guided Meditation for Cleansing Relationships and Cutting Cords
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 382: Summer Series: Why Codependency Is Controlling & How To Heal It | 31 Aug 2023 | 00:26:29 | |
Codependency is one of those issues that can often come across as selfless to those around us...in fact, it might even earn us praise because we seem so nice and helpful (although at our own expense).
But what if I told you that codependency was actually a form of control? This episode today was inspired by a very insightful question from one of our listeners who shared his realization that in his codependency, he was being unintentionally manipulative and controlling. He was showing up as the ever-helpful husband, but he was often doing this from a place of trying to get his own needs met (earning his wife's love, support, etc.). Of course, this was not conscious, and once he had his awakening, he wanted to know how to move forward and learn how to be genuinely helpful and healthy.
Codependency is one of my favorite topics to talk about, and in this episode, I'm giving you five simple steps for what to do next when you find yourself asking, "I'm codependent. Now what?"
Listen to discover:
If this is you, the first step is to drop the blame and shame. You weren't trying to be manipulative; you were trying to survive based on what your programming told you to do. Once you realize this, you can step into a whole new chapter in your life...one filled with healthier relationships and a healthier connection to self!
"We're controlling and being manipulative from an unconscious place." - Michelle Chalfant
"We betray ourselves and change who we are in order to make sure other people outside of us are happy and peaceful. That's how it's manipulative and controlling." - Michelle Chalfant
"We need someone who can fact check us." - Michelle Chalfant
"That's why so many codependents are so exhausted, because our energy is going out to others all day, every day." - Michelle Chalfant
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 477: The Power of Reflexology with Suzanne Chilton | 25 Sep 2025 | 00:45:52 | |
In this episode, I sit down with Suzanne Chilton to dive deep into the world of reflexology. Suzanne shares her personal journey from a career in the arts to discovering the healing benefits of reflexology while caring for her husband through invasive cancer treatments. We discuss how reflexology can support self-care, wellness, and health by naturally reducing stress, anxiety, and inflammation. Suzanne explains the interconnectedness of the body's systems and demonstrates practical techniques to relieve tension and promote balance. Whether you're looking for natural ways to enhance your well-being or curious about alternative therapies, this conversation is filled with valuable insights and practical tips to start your reflexology journey. In this episode, you'll hear:
Resources from this Episode: Connect with Suzanne Chilton on Instagram & Facebook @footgurureflexology Suzanne's Website: www.footgurureflexology.com/links (access tutorials, foot maps, online courses, and pro trainings) Special Offer: Foot Map Miracle Mini-Course
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 381: Summer Series: How To Get Rid of Negative Emotions | 24 Aug 2023 | 00:26:11 | |
Grief, anger, sadness, fear…YUCK! I don't know anyone who likes to feel these emotions.
I get emails from you guys all the time asking how to get rid of "negative" emotions like these.
But are these emotions really negative? Or do they serve a purpose in our lives?
While some emotions might feel more unpleasant than others, I personally don't believe any emotion is negative. All emotions are part of the human experience and carry information for us.
However, they can create negative experiences in life when we get stuck in them.
The problem isn't the emotions; it's that we don't know what to do with them!
In this show, I'm teaching you how to work through the full range of emotions you were designed to experience as a human and how to get unstuck if you find yourself lost in anger, grief or fear.
You'll discover practical steps for feeling your emotions in a way that allows them to move through you, no matter how you saw emotions modeled growing up.
Listen to discover:
Emotions are simply energy that moves through our body and creates sensation. And on the spectrum of emotions from love to fear, some feel better than others…but because they are energy, they can ALL move through us (and move through us quickly).
Problems arise when emotions come up that we don't want to feel. We avoid them and shut them down, which makes us more likely to get stuck in these "negative" experiences.
That's why we have to start going INTO our emotions, no matter how uncomfortable it might feel. When you do this, you'll be surprised how quickly they move through you...and what powerful insights they might hold for you.
"We're human, and humans were created to have emotions. We were created to have a range of emotions." - Michelle Chalfant
"There's an energy to emotions that rises up and passes through us." - Michelle Chalfant
"I don't even like to call emotions on the fear end of the spectrum 'negative.'" - Michelle Chalfant
"Anger propels us forward." - Michelle Chalfant
"Energy is always in motion, and emotions are energy." - Michelle Chalfant
"Something that keeps emotions stuck is a story." - Michelle Chalfant
"Just let it go and be present with whatever is coming up." - Michelle Chalfant
"When you put pen to paper, you're tapping into your unconscious world." - Michelle Chalfant
"There's power when someone is witnessing what's going on in our inner world." - Michelle Chalfant
"If you feel the energy of peace, it's neutral." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Green Chef https://www.greenchef.com/adult50 Use code ADULT50 for 50% off + free shipping
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 380: Summer Series: A Holistic Approach to Anxiety with Dr. Ellen Vora | 17 Aug 2023 | 00:59:35 | |
Our society today is facing an epidemic of anxiety. Despite technology that promises to make our lives faster and easier, it seems that we're more anxious than ever. In 2020, Google searches for "anxiety" reached an all-time high.
We have to look beyond the diagnosis of anxiety and seek to find the root cause of why so many people are living with such high stress and dysregulation that are creating anxiety. There is something bigger going on here.
And since we're whole humans, we need to look at the whole picture – mind, body and spirit – when thinking about how we heal and manage anxiety.
My guest on this show, Dr. Ellen Vora, is a psychiatrist who takes a functional medicine approach to anxiety, looking at mental health factors and physical health factors, such as sleep, digestion and blood sugar, that can add up to throw us out of balance and contribute to feelings of anxiety.
She also helps us to distinguish between feelings of anxiety that come from a physical imbalance vs. true anxiety, which comes from our inner compass telling us something truly isn't ok.
Listen to discover:
We need to start taking a "layered" approach to treating and managing anxiety by looking at the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual elements of our lives and how they work together to create stress or health. This hopeful approach to anxiety empowers us all to make choices that support our well-being, even in the face of real personal and mental health challenges.
"I was sort of taking the temperature of our society, and the temperature right now is anxiety." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"False anxiety is anxiety that is not our true essence." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"It's not just one thing that we have to look at." - Michelle Chalfant
"Genes plays a role, but that keeps a lot of us feeling stuck and feeling destined to be anxious....it's more dynamic than we appreciate." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"Our problems, our stressors are still valid. It's just that if we had a snack and our blood sugar was more stable in that moment, we would be more resilient in the face of our stressors." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"Our mind is the consummate meaning maker." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"It's not like we have to dramatically change everything that we do, but we just want to make informed choices." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"We don't get to gluten free or decaf coffee our way out of our true anxiety." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"I would have my clients sit in their bodies and feel what was going on, and their physical symptoms would start to change." - Michelle Chalfant
"[Anxiety] is the physical manifestation of unfelt emotions." - Michelle Chalfant
"It's our body that's able to listen and really dial in and tap into a deeper knowing." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"It's turning toward the anxiety instead of turning away from." - Michelle Chalfant
"We reach outside of ourselves to 'fix us'…and it doesn't end it. We've gotta get to the root." - Michelle Chalfant
"We need to change our narrative of what is materially possible." - Dr. Ellen Vora
"We're never stuck. We are never broken." - Dr. Ellen Vora
LINKS & RESOURCES
Dr. Ellen Vora Website
Dr. Ellen Vora Instagram https://www.instagram.com/ellenvoramd/
"The Anatomy of Anxiety" (Dr. Ellen Vora book) https://www.amazon.com/Anatomy-Anxiety-Understanding-Overcoming-Response/dp/0063075091
The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 379: Summer Series: Enmeshment, Codependency & Boundaries with Dr. Ken Adams | 10 Aug 2023 | 00:56:10 | |
Do you ever feel like you're being disloyal to your family for having your own life? Or do you feel like you're second fiddle to your partner's parents?
If so, you or your partner might come from an enmeshed family: a system of relating to each other that is based on dependency, guilt, obligation and too much closeness (yes, that can be a thing!).
In today's episode, I'm bringing back one of your favorite guests, Dr. Ken Adams, to talk about the important topic of enmeshment – and let me tell you, he is SUCH a wealth of knowledge!
When I knew we were bringing Dr. Adams back, I asked The Adult Chair® community what you wanted to know about enmeshment, and I was flooded with questions! So, I used this time with Dr. Adams to ask him YOUR questions – everything from the difference between codependency and enmeshment to what to do if your spouse is enmeshed with his or her family to how to let go as an enmeshed parent.
I know you guys are so excited to have Dr. Adams back and to get your questions answered, and I am too!
Listen to discover:
The key to recognizing enmeshment is to understand that it's a connection bound by guilt. It goes beyond being caring and even beyond being codependent to the point of obligation, anger and being accused of disloyalty if you don't follow the family system. These feelings of guilt can make it difficult to set boundaries, but if you stay in your Adult, sit with your emotions and hold those boundaries, freedom – and possibly a much healthier family overall – is waiting for you on the other side. "In those enmeshed systems, dependency is built on obligation and loyalty is driven by guilt." - Dr. Ken Adams "Autonomy and separateness feel like disloyalty." - Dr. Ken Adams "Sometimes outsiders are viewed suspiciously, which includes your spouse." - Dr. Ken Adams "Both partners are responsible for keeping out intrusions". - Dr. Ken Adams "Sometimes the guilt is a representation that you're doing the right thing." - Dr. Ken Adams "You don't let the guilt stop you from continuing the boundaries in that relationship." - Michelle Chalfant "It's really building up self-worth around who am I now…who am I really underneath these masks that my parents put on me." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Dr. Ken Adams Website https://www.overcomingenmeshment.com/
Episode #256: Understanding Enmeshment with Dr. Ken Adams https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/256/
Episode #276: Raising Teens from The Adult Chair® with Dr. Pam Staples https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/276/
Find an Adult Chair® Coach https://theadultchair.com/coaches/
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 378: Summer Series: Healing Your Abandonment Wound with Susan Anderson | 03 Aug 2023 | 00:51:53 | |
Rejection is one of the greatest fears we have as humans. Even simple rejections like not making the team or being chosen for a job – things we know aren't personal – still sting deeply. Why does rejection seem to hit at the core of who we are?
Susan Anderson began asking this question when she went through a personal experience of abandonment. The love of her life left her suddenly for another woman, and although she was a practicing psychotherapist with immense knowledge of the human mind, she still found herself in emotional crisis and doubting herself and her worthiness.
As she dug more into this topic, she discovered that we as humans have a primal abandonment wound – a universal experience that begins when we are born and go from deep union and connection with our mother to a feeling of being separate. This creates deep shame and causes us to search for belonging and worthiness throughout our lives.
And this is why rejection hurts so much: it triggers this deep fear that we might not belong and we might not be worthy.
In this fascinating and important episode, Susan shares her discoveries on the topic of abandonment, why we experience it the ways we do and how a whole host of other issues in our lives can stem from this wound. We discussed why healing abandonment trauma looks different from healing other traumas, the five stages of healing and the tools (all of which are part of The Adult Chair® model) that can heal it.
Listen to discover:
The primal wound of abandonment is also an opportunity for primal healing. When we learn to love and accept ourselves as worthy and recognize how deeply connected we truly are, we not only heal our abandonment wound, but we can change almost anything in our lives. "The loneliness is sort of a secondary feeling. The primary is the primal fear and the shame of maybe never being worthy of keeping someone." - Susan Anderson
"The personality itself is a defense against the shame." - Susan Anderson
"When we look at a relationship that ends, it is a retraumatization of what we experienced as a child." - Michelle Chalfant
"The history that leads to a strong reaction in adulthood to abandonment could be very subtle." - Susan Anderson
"You have to take this step, and you go through it...The pain is there, but you go through it, and you get to the other side." - Michelle Chalfant
"Your adult self can now develop an intense, loving, reassuring relationship with your inner child." - Susan Anderson
"It turns this awful emotional crisis that's so painful into an opportunity for something that's probably long overdue, which is self-love." - Susan Anderson
"Doing these steps, you will become an even better, stronger, more self-loving person on the other side of it...even stronger than you were prior to this abandonment wound." - Michelle Chalfant
"The kind of self-love that we're developing is deeper, more mature self-love...the kind of love you give yourself because you respect yourself so much." - Susan Anderson
"We have to stop looking outside of self and turn our attention inward. That's where healing, that's where love, that's where hope, that's where peace, that's where all the things are that we're looking for outside of ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant
"When the adult gets strong and is in command, it limits all of this self-sabotage." - Susan Anderson
LINKS & RESOURCES
Susan Anderson Website https://abandonmentrecovery.com
"The Journey from Abandonment to Healing" (Susan Anderson book) https://www.amazon.com/Journey-Abandonment-Healing-Surviving-Recovering/dp/0425273539
Green Chef https://www.greenchef.com/adult50 Use code ADULT50 for 50% off + free shipping
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Join the 2024 Waitlist! https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 377: Summer Series: Why and How To Feel Your Emotions | 27 Jul 2023 | 00:29:40 | |
In my 25 years of private practice, the #1 issue I worked on with clients was feeling their emotions. Whether someone was anxious, reactive and raging or numb to the world, the question they were all asking was, "What the heck do I do with these emotions?" I've been there too. And it breaks my heart, because experiencing emotions is one of the gifts of being human. But the good news is that all of us can reclaim this part of ourselves and learn to feel our emotions. And when we do, it unlocks all kinds of possibilities in life! In this episode, I'm breaking down why it's so important that we learn to feel our emotions and some practical ways to do that. I'm also addressing some of the common fears and discomfort around feeling emotions (like, "What if I get stuck in this emotion?") and helping you understand why this is your birthright – and how it can improve your relationships, your intuition and your life! Listen to discover:
No one is born without emotions, but along the way, we learn to suppress them – and in turn, disconnect from who we really are. Feeling emotions is the key to connecting back to yourself and one of the foundational pillars of being a healthy adult. I hope this episode helps guide you back to this essential part of you. "We'd have a completely different world if we were all able to tune into what our emotions are." - Michelle Chalfant "We become whole humans when we feel our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "We're all born to feel emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "When we feel our emotions, it is a gateway into our intuition. We have enhanced intuition when we are in tune with and know what we are feeling emotionally." - Michelle Chalfant "Instead of asking yourself, 'What do I think?" ask yourself, "What do I feel?'" - Michelle Chalfant "Empathy is when we're able to tune into another person and feel what they're feeling. It's a beautiful skill to have." - Michelle Chalfant "Connecting with the inner child is simply activating an energy." - Michelle Chalfant "There's so much power in feeling our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Free Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 376: Summer Series: "I Feel Like a Fraud!" Overcoming Imposter Syndrome | 20 Jul 2023 | 00:20:32 | |
You landed the dream gig, got the promotion, submitted your book for publishing, had an amazing first date. So, why do you feel so insecure, unsure and even unworthy? Hello, imposter syndrome! Imposter syndrome, or feeling like a fraud, is something that everyone struggles with from time to time — yep, even those super successful people you look up to. It's that feeling that you don't really deserve the recognition or opportunities you've earned or you worry you're not really good enough for them. It often sounds like, "If they only knew…" Imposter syndrome can pop up when something good happens in our life or it can hold us back from ever going after our dreams. In this episode, I'm breaking down exactly what imposter syndrome is, where it comes from and the concrete steps you can take to work through it and overcome it! Listen to discover:
Feeling like a fraud is part of the human experience. But because this feeling causes us shame, we hide it and then end up thinking we're the only ones. It's time we talk about it openly — and talk about what you can do so it doesn't hold you back any longer! I hope the steps in this episode are steps you can turn to anytime you feel imposter syndrome creep up. "If you feel this way, don't feel like you're the only one." - Michelle Chalfant
"It's the feeling that you're a fraud, that you don't deserve compliments, praise or success that you rightfully earned." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we have imposter syndrome, we feel like our success happened by chance or by luck." - Michelle Chalfant
"It's like we're carrying around this big, dark secret that we want no one to know about." - Michelle Chalfant
"It's critical to have self-worth. This is one of the ways that we work ourselves out of feeling like a fraud or an imposter." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we can become witness to it, we give ourselves another perspective." - Michelle Chalfant
"Don't let your rouge thoughts run your life." - Michelle Chalfant
"When we change our thoughts into positive, conscious thoughts about who we are, it feels better." - Michelle Chalfant
"What we're not great at doing is accepting and owning our accomplishments." - Michelle Chalfant
"These are your accomplishments. They're yours. Claim them. Be proud of them." - Michelle Chalfant
"Self-worth is key to changing your mindset about being a fraud." - Michelle Chalfant
"Self-worth is all about value." - Michelle Chalfant
"Imposter syndrome is much more common than you would think." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Green Chef https://www.greenchef.com/adult60 Use code ADULT60 for 60% off + free shipping
The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ \
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 375: Summer Series: A Raw Conversation About Sobriety with Laura McKowen | 13 Jul 2023 | 00:57:05 | |
Cheers. Salud. Skol.
Wherever you are in the world, it seems like alcohol punctuates every celebration.
But have we stopped to ask if alcohol is really good for us? Or have we paused to get curious about why we drink – and when it moves from genuine enjoyment to unhealthy numbing out?
Recently, I've noticed more people having conversations about sobriety, from giving up drinking entirely to swapping a few cocktails for mocktails, and I thought it was time we talked about alcohol through the lens of The Adult Chair®.
In this episode, I'm chatting with Laura McKowen, who has written extensively about getting sober and runs a global sobriety support community. She openly and vulnerably shares her story of using alcohol to numb her emotions, why and how she got sober and what her life looks like now.
We talked about how our culture normalizes excessive drinking, all the emotions that come up when getting sober and ways to tell if you might have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. If you're at all "sober curious," you're going to love hearing her perspective! Listen to discover:
Like everything in The Adult Chair, we aren't talking in terms of "do" or "don't" or "good" or "bad," but about bringing consciousness into the decisions we make.
My goal for this show is not to tell you to stop drinking, but to encourage you to take a closer look at when you drink, why you drink and how you drink so you can truly live life to the fullest: present, awake and alive!
"I knew I liked to drink a little too much. I loved it a little too much." - Laura McKowen
[When offered a drink after a bad day] "I don't want a glass of wine. I would like to come talk to you about my emotions though." - Michelle Chalfant
"We end up recreating our life in a way that decenters alcohol...my life is still my life." - Laura McKowen
"When you are drinking even a little more than you want to, it keeps you from facing the truth." - Laura McKowen
"Alcohol provides a really great shield to just sort of skim across the top of life." - Laura McKowen
"I was in a lot of emotional pain. I know that's exactly why I reached for alcohol." - Michelle Chalfant
"We don't get away with not feeling things. It goes somewhere." - Laura McKowen
"Shame disconnects us from our humanity and the humanity in other people." - Laura McKowen
"The not drinking wasn't the cure....it was actually connecting with other people in a meaningful way and healing in relationship with people that allowed me to heal." - Laura McKowen
LINKS & RESOURCES
Laura McKowen Website
Laura McKowen Instagram https://www.instagram.com/laura_mckowen/
"Push Off From Here" (Laura McKowen Book) https://www.lauramckowen.com/books
The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 374: Summer Series: Balancing Your Hormones for a Healthier Life with Candace Burch | 06 Jul 2023 | 01:10:13 | |
There are so many different aspects of being an emotionally healthy adult. We're complex, connected beings, and our bodies, our minds, our emotions, our spiritual lives…they all play a role in how we feel every day. It all matters! One of the areas we don't talk about enough is our hormones. Hormones impact SO many of our bodily and mental functions, and we've been kept in the dark about them for too long! Everyone deserves to understand this part of themselves! In this episode, I talk to hormone health educator Candace Burch to help us understand all things hormones…and wow, is she a WEALTH of information! We talk about how hormones impact our lives from our teenage years all the way through menopause, the symptoms of hormonal imbalances and all the related topics when it comes to hormones: birth control, fertility, anxiety, acne, PCOS, stress and SO much more. You will walk away with a much better understanding of the role of each hormone in your body and the empowered choices you have when it comes to balancing your hormones. Listen to discover:
This show focuses on female hormones since they are so complex, but I hope it is helpful for all of us to recognize that our internal chemistry and the cyclical nature of our bodies are not to be ignored. When we learn to work with our bodies, trust our intuitions and get support when we're feeling out of balance, we can take more ownership of our health through every stage of life. "Painful periods are not normal." - Candace Burch "So many women are not aware of the symptoms or they become their symptoms." - Candace Burch "The whole concept of hormone imbalance is relatively new." - Candace Burch "Ovulation disruption is one of the big reasons people become hormonally imbalanced." - Candace Burch "When you talk about health or hormonal health in any case, it's always about nutrient dense proteins, good nutrition." - Candace Burch "That's key: keeping blood sugar stable." - Candace Burch "There's this inevitable road to hormones shifting, but they shouldn't be shifting like a roller coaster." - Candace Burch "I think a lot of people don't even know how to relax anymore." - Candace Burch "The adrenals are key to everything really." - Candace Burch "There are not a lot of studies with intermittent fasting with women." - Michelle Chalfant "Progesterone is the great balancing hormone." - Candace Burch "Estrogen has so many functions. We need it." - Candace Burch "I'm a fan of hormone replenishment when testing takes place first, in measured doses." - Candace Burch "High cortisol at night is really problematic." - Candace Burch "I think most PCOS is very much linked to insulin resistance and an imbalance of blood sugar." - Candace Burch "Anyone that has PCOS doesn't need to feel helpless and hopeless." - Candace Burch "I think women have to trust their intuition." - Candace Burch LINKS & RESOURCES Candace Burch Website https://www.yourhormonebalance.com/ Your Hormone Balance Instagram https://www.instagram.com/yourhormonebalance The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy Build Your Own Rebalancing Package https://www.yourhormonebalance.com/b-y-o-rebalancing-package?ref=48199-The-Adult-Chair-Podcast Use code ADULTCHAIR50 for $50 off MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 373: Drama Addiction with Dr. Scott Lyons | 29 Jun 2023 | 00:56:53 | |
You see their name pop up on your phone, and you immediately notice yourself feeling stressed. It's that friend who always seems to be in crisis, who always calls to gossip or vent. We all know that person…many of us ARE that person. It's called drama addiction, and there's a part in all of us that is drawn towards chaos and stress. Sometimes this shows up in big, dramatic ways, and other times, it's subtler, like our need to always be busy, doom scroll through the news or argue with someone on social media. My brilliant guest today, Dr. Scott Lyons, is a trauma expert who has studied what is really going on in the brain and body when we're addicted to drama. He breaks down what trauma does in our body, why addiction forms in response and what exactly is happening in our nervous system when we seek out stress, busyness and drama. Dr. Lyons also helps us navigate situations where others are pulling us into their drama (including news and social media), explaining why we do this, how it affects our nervous systems and the boundaries we can put in place to protect ourselves. This episode is full of major "aha" moments that will help you better understand trauma and how stress affects you, whether you are addicted to drama or know someone who is. Listen to discover:
We all unconsciously do the things that make us feel safe, accepted, loved and alive. If we grew up in a chaotic or dysregulating environment, drama feels safe to us, and that's why we seek it out. Understanding your nervous system and how your experiences have shaped it is so empowering and will greatly increase your compassion for yourself and others. This show is a must listen! "We all know someone addicted to drama." - Dr. Scott Lyons "The first part of a stress response is a release of endorphins, is a release of pain relief…So, we become attached, dependent on wanting hits of things that give us essentially that constant stream of pain relief." - Dr. Scott Lyons "In our nervous systems, our exaggerated responses are justified if we're addicted to drama." - Dr. Scott Lyons "Self-regulation is the ability to know how much energy, attention and emotion to utilize in our system to properly adapt to a stimulus." - Dr. Scott Lyons "An addiction to drama looks different on the outside than what it feels like on the inside." - Dr. Scott Lyons "I've noticed with people in my life that are chronically busy, when there's a space of downtime, boom, it's filled right away." - Michelle Chalfant "That tornado of chaos that we all know so well, that we've either created ourselves or been pulled into, that is a sad cry for a sense of connection." - Dr. Scott Lyons "I would think as soon as the internet was created that [drama addiction] became a bigger addiction for most people." - Michelle Chalfant "The ways in which media, and social media specifically, operate have replicated the conditions of an addiction to drama, but on an endemic scale." - Dr. Scott Lyons "We live in a stress economy." - Dr. Scott Lyons "Negative information — fear, anger, sadness — will be more capturing of our attention than positive news…We are more likely in watching the news to believe bad things will happen to us." - Dr. Scott Lyons "The most contagious state is a stress state." - Dr. Scott Lyons "We want the drama." - Michelle Chalfant "I did so much nervous system work with myself for so many years, and I'm finally in this place of much more balance…now I protect myself from drama." - Michelle Chalfant "That is the curative to an addiction, and it is belonging. And when we belong to ourselves, we can start to lower the drawbridge and feel intimacy, the safety for intimacy and belonging to other people." - Dr. Scott Lyons LINKS & RESOURCES Dr. Scott Lyons Website Dr. Scott Lyons Instagram https://www.instagram.com/drscottlyons/ "The Gently Used Human" (Dr. Scott Lyons Podcast) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-gently-used-human-with-dr-scott-lyons/id1685789759 "Addicted to Drama" (Dr. Scott Lyons Book) https://www.amazon.com/Addicted-Drama-Healing-Dependency-Yourself/dp/0306925834 The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 372: Emotional balance with food and fitness with Brian Keane | 22 Jun 2023 | 00:51:12 | |
Trigger Warning: This episode discusses topics such as exercise, relationship with food and body image. Though the intent is to promote a conscious and healthy mindset around these topics, please use caution in listening if you have a history of an eating disorder or body image disorder. Summer is here…and with it, thousands of messages about diets, weight loss and fitness. There is so much pressure from society to look a certain way, and these messages can be so harmful to our mental and emotional health. At the same time, movement and nourishment are vital parts of both physical and mental health, and many people have positive fitness goals for themselves: being able to participate in a sport they love, having more energy to play with their kids or staying active as they get older. We need a more conscious approach to the conversation around fitness and nutrition – one where we learn to tune out the voices of our society and tune into ourselves instead: our why, what we really want and what we uniquely need to be healthy. Brian Keane is a personal trainer who helps his clients approach fitness from a more holistic perspective, bringing mindset, motivation and emotional well-being into the fitness journey. He realized that clients would come to him saying they wanted their bodies to look a certain way, but what they really wanted was to feel a certain way: secure, confident, peaceful. Now as part of his training, he helps people identify their why, connect to their emotions, evaluate their relationship with food and exercise and look at the whole picture of well-being – sleep, stress, connection, etc. In this episode, Brian breaks down his holistic approach to fitness, walking us through how to navigate diet claims, find inner strength while remaining self-compassionate, tap into the power of motivation and make small, lasting changes in any area of life. Listen to discover:
Our bodies are part of the self, and all parts of us are interconnected. Our emotional health impacts how we treat ourselves physically, and how we care for ourselves physically impacts our emotional well-being. The key is to find a balanced approach to fitness that incorporates the whole self. Whether you're someone who can't wait to get to the gym, someone who wants to start exercising more or someone learning to treat your body more kindly, it's all about tuning out the noise, the pressure and the cookie cutter images of beauty and doing what works for YOU! "I help [clients] rewire their relationship with food and rewire their relationship with fitness so that they can take that holistic approach so that it's serving their life and not taking from it." - Brian Keane "Everything that happens to us happens to us for a reason. What's meant for you won't pass you as long as you listen." - Brian Keane "In their mind, they think that if they look this specific way, it will remove this feeling that they have." - Brian Keane "When you take a holistic approach to fitness, all those other areas of your life can improve." - Brian Keane "It's always an internal job." - Michelle Chalfant "So many of us, we use food to numb out our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "With food being 'good' and 'bad,' that's more a projection that we as humans are putting on the food." - Brian Keane "Your body knows what it wants you to eat." - Michelle Chalfant "It's all about balance." - Michelle Chalfant "Motivation is just a state change." - Brian Keane "Everything is difficult when you try to change it first. But...if you persevere and you're consistent with it and you make it a daily habit, eventually it becomes your new normal, and then it becomes easy." - Brian Keane "Too many changes too soon is a recipe for failure." - Brian Keane "The small things done consistently well lead to extraordinary results over time." - Brian Keane "I don't like that word, 'diet,' but I do like having this goal of just being healthy." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Brian Keane Website https://briankeanefitness.com/ "The Fitness Mindset" (Brian Keane book) https://briankeanefitness.com/fitness-mindset/ "Rewire Your Mindset" (Brian Keane book) https://briankeanefitness.com/rewire-your-mindset/ Crisis Text Line for Eating Disorders https://www.crisistextline.org/topics/eating-disorders/#what-is-an-eating-disorder-1 The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 476: How to Find Your Passion (Even If You Feel Completely Stuck) | 18 Sep 2025 | 00:17:56 | |
Have you ever asked yourself, "What am I really here to do?" If you feel stuck, unfulfilled, or unsure about your purpose, you are not alone. I hear this question all the time, and I've been there myself. In this episode, I'm sharing a fresh way to think about purpose. It's not something you have to go out and chase, it already lives inside of you. The real work is learning how to align with it. In this episode, I'll walk you through:
Resources from this Episode: The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE!
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 371: 5 Ways To Navigate a Relationship That Feels Stuck | 15 Jun 2023 | 00:20:06 | |
There's someone in your life you love, but the relationship just isn't working.
Despite your best efforts to communicate and try to work things out, nothing is changing. This person seems totally uninterested in listening to you or working on the relationship.
You've hit a wall, and the relationship feels stuck.
This can be so maddening, frustrating, disappointing and painful! You wouldn't be trying to make it work if you didn't care for this person, but you can't make them change…and you're hurting in the meantime.
I hear from listeners all the time who find themselves in this situation, with a romantic partner, a friend, a family member or a colleague. They want to know: How do you approach this with an Adult Chair perspective…not just for the relationship, but for yourself?
In this episode, I'm giving you five steps to take when you feel stuck or at an impasse with someone in your life. These are all things YOU have the power to do, no matter the other person's response, and they will help you find new clarity, perspective and ideas for navigating this situation.
Listen to discover:
Relationships can be beautiful, hard and everything in between.
It's ok – and even expected – that certain people will come and go throughout our lives. Perhaps you've learned what you're meant to learn and it's time to let go, or perhaps there's something for your soul to learn by working through this difficult process together.
Whether you want to keep fighting for a relationship or you know it's time to end it, the steps in this episode will help you stay in your Adult Chair, control what you can, let go of what you can't and take care of YOU, so you can live with peace and hope no matter what happens with the relationship.
"Have you considered that the reason that you're with this person…is because you needed to learn, grow, transform or find something about yourself?" - Michelle Chalfant
"Acceptance and liking are two very different things." - Michelle Chalfant
"When you're able to accept somebody for who they are, there's almost like a release that happens. There's a detachment that happens." - Michelle Chalfant
"People are not going to change until they're ready and willing to change." - Michelle Chalfant
"Just because the relationship needs to be shifted, it doesn't mean it has to end." - Michelle Chalfant
"We cannot go around our pain. We go through our pain, and we are stronger on the other side." - Michelle Chalfant
"Emotions are meant to be experienced, felt and processed, or metabolized, through the body and the energy field. And if we don't build a story around what we're feeling…those emotions move through us." - Michelle Chalfant
"Boundaries are not confrontational." - Michelle Chalfant
"To let go is to truly detach from [the] outcome, and we let go of our expectations as well." - Michelle Chalfant
"It's beautiful when we are able to look at our lives and ask, 'What do I need?'" - Michelle Chalfant
"Relationships can be beautiful, but they can also be really hard…and they can also be somewhere in the middle." - Michelle Chalfant
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 370: End Your Ruminating Thoughts With Parts Work | 08 Jun 2023 | 00:26:39 | |
"I'm such a horrible person." "I can't believe I did that…I'm so stupid." "I'm not good enough."
Do these types of thoughts sound familiar? If so, you're not alone.
As humans, we can be so mean to ourselves. We make a mistake and beat ourselves up for hours. We look in the mirror and are met with a barrage of negative self-talk. Sometimes these thoughts come at us relentlessly, like a flood.
But these thoughts are not the truth about who we are. They come from an inner part or voice inside of us that is actually trying to keep us safe.
And when we have the tools to work with these parts of self, we can stop these critical and ruminating thoughts in their tracks – and transform so many of the struggles that come with them, like depression, low self-worth and overwhelm.
In this episode, I'm sharing the story of a friend who came to me for help with critical thoughts that she couldn't shake. I walk you step-by-step through the parts work method I used with her and the process she went through that stopped those thoughts almost instantly.
Then, I explain why parts work is so powerful, how it works in our unconscious mind and exactly how you can use it to work with your own critical parts – or any other part of yourself for that matter! Listen to discover:
The amazing thing about parts work is that you don't have to spend years working with a part or even be in a coaching or therapy session to do this work. My friend's transformation happened during a casual conversation we had after work. And as I share in this episode, I use parts work when I'm out for a walk or in the middle of the day. This is an empowering tool we ALL need in our toolbox!
At the heart of parts work is giving ourselves what we needed but didn't get when we were young. As a healthy adult, you now get to be that strong, caring adult for your younger self – and when you do, you will be amazed at the deep inner healing that takes place.
"I started doing parts work when I was 30 years old, and I changed my life." - Michelle Chalfant
"Not everybody's visual, so please don't think there's something wrong if you [don't visualize a part]." - Michelle Chalfant
"I always thank these parts because they are doing such a good job at keeping me safe." - Michelle Chalfant
"This is what I love about the unconscious mind…they pull things out of left field." - Michelle Chalfant
"When you are hearing these voices in your head, the ruminating thoughts, the beating up on self…start asking yourself this question: 'Who is saying that?'" - Michelle Chalfant
"I really think you are going to be amazed at the different parts of yourself that you will start to discover." - Michelle Chalfant
"This is how we really experience more of who we are, and this is the journey we are on in order to rediscover and live from our true self." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Share Your Love: Review The Adult Chair® Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adult-chair/id941317634
The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 369: Your needs are your superpower with Mara Glatzel | 01 Jun 2023 | 00:46:45 | |
As humans, we all have needs. From the time we're babies, when we literally need someone to feed us and take care of us, to adults who need connection, safety and belonging, our wants and needs are part of our inner world and part of ourselves. But somewhere along the way we start to feel ashamed of these needs, believing we're "too much" or "weak" or too "needy." But I believe being able to acknowledge and ask for what we need is actually a superpower! My guest today, Mara Glatzel, is a coach who helps people stop self-abandoning and start taking ownership of their needs. She digs into the many different dynamics of what it means to be a human who has needs and how we can better take care of ourselves as we navigate this world. We talk about the most common human needs, why we tend to judge and suppress our own needs and how it's when we suppress them that our needs come out sideways (as anger, resentment, unrealistic expectations or disconnecting from self). Mara shares how to build a practice of connecting with self to check in with your needs on a regular basis, how to reclaim your sense of self if you've lost it and how to start validating and taking care of your needs…the true definition of self-care. Listen to discover:
The Child Chair (or inner child) is where we are connected to our true needs – physical, emotional and spiritual. As healthy adults, we know how to advocate for our needs by using the power of choice and boundaries to protect ourselves, as well as asking for what we need while honoring others' boundaries. I hope this episode helps you start owning your needs as a strength, so instead of shaming ourselves for having needs, we can become people who support ourselves and others in healthy ways. "The reality is that our needs are a fact and not a flaw." - Mara Glatzel "A need is whatever it is that you require in order to exist and survive." - Mara Glatzel "I think we need training to tap into ourselves so we can identify what our needs are." - Michelle Chalfant "So many of us are working so hard to belong to the world around us at the cost of belonging to ourselves." - Mara Glatzel "Taking responsibility for your own needs is an essential part of self-leadership." - Mara Glatzel "The self-care that we often see and that we're often sold is prescriptive in nature...I have a lot of clients who come to me burnt out on self-care." - Mara Glatzel "When you take a moment and slow down and really tune in and ask yourself, 'What do I need?'...it changes things." - Michelle Chalfant "It's a beautiful form of self-care to just check in with self." - Michelle Chalfant "If we don't check in, then we might be living our lives on autopilot in so many ways." - Mara Glatzel "I think anything other than a full-throated acceptance of your needs is self-abandonment." - Mara Glatzel "To learn how to be our best advocate and ask for what we need is powerful." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Mara Glatzel Website "Needy" (Mara Glatzel Book) https://www.maraglatzel.com/book/ Mara Glatzel Instagram https://www.instagram.com/maraglatzel/ Free Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 368: Relationship Essentials with Dr. Stan Tatkin | 25 May 2023 | 01:19:51 | |
Watch any rom-com or fairy tale and they'd have you believe relationships are as simple as meeting someone and falling in love. But is love really all it takes to have a healthy relationship?
Though we often think of relationships as a matter of the heart, the truth is there's a whole world of chemistry happening in your body and brain that has more impact on your relationship than you realize, such as:
Dr. Stan Tatkin, who looks at relationships through a biological and psychological lens, is back on the podcast this week talking about the relationship essentials that lead to not just long-lasting relationships but happy relationships.
He breaks down what's really going on under the surface in different relationship situations (like conflict or betrayal), the critical role our threat response plays in building or damaging connection and how to consciously create more secure functioning based on principles like fairness, justice and mutuality.
Listen to discover:
We must have safety in order to have connection. Dr. Tatkin says the goal is to learn how to remove interpersonal stress and feelings of threat in relationships, which lead to not just relationship health but mental, emotional and physical health for everyone in and around the relationship. The next time you meet a new love interest or the next time you and your beloved are having a conversation, don't just ask how you feel about the situation – also pay attention to how your nervous system is reacting and what your body is telling you. This awareness is key to picking the right partner, creating more emotional safety and building more life-giving, long-term partnerships. "[One reason relationships fail is] the manner in which all of us will interact when one or both of us is under stress. And this has to do with threat...where our brain changes and we start to, on some level, believe that the other person is not an ally." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"Everything is about relationships and how we navigate our way in those relationships." - Michelle Chalfant
"Learning about ourselves is intertwined with learning about another person." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"The only remedy to automation...is presence and attention. We have to build things in that ensure we're in love or in respect." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"When we are in an argument with our beloved, it's so important to give them something while we are in process." - Michelle Chalfant
"Quick repair actually saves us downstream...the smart thing to do is to fix things now so that we don't end up spending all of our time in the junkyard, not living life but sorting out everything we did wrong." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"The main problem with most issues around affairs, cheating is the lying...the biggest damage is the reveal of information that, if I had known, would have changed everything for me." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"Everybody has a different way of determining what is happy for them." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"It goes back to open, honest, raw communication, no matter what kind of relationship you're in." - Michelle Chalfant
"This whole thing about, 'I can't quit you,' isn't a rational drive, but it is powerful as hell." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"The secret to longevity, happiness, mental health, physical health is the presence of at least one secure functioning relationship in your life." - Dr. Stan Tatkin
"I think we need to start taking some risks of just inviting people over for dinner or out to coffee or go to lunch...start taking that risk and be brave and start connecting more. We need in-person connection." - Michelle Chalfant
LINKS & RESOURCES
Dr. Stan Tatkin Website https://www.thepactinstitute.com/
"In Each Other's Care" (Dr. Stan Tatkin Book) https://www.amazon.com/Each-Others-Care-Relationship-Conflicts-ebook/dp/B0B19FWBXL
Episode #328: Understanding And Improving Your Relationship With Dr. Stan Tatkin https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/328/
Find an Adult Chair® Coach https://theadultchair.com/coach
Share Your Love: Review The Adult Chair® Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adult-chair/id941317634
Headspace Try it free for 30 days https://www.headspace.com/adult30
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 367: Change Your Mindset & Change Your Life with Michael Hyatt | 18 May 2023 | 00:54:07 | |
There's something in your life you want to change. Where do you start? My friend, business coach and wildly successful entrepreneur, Michael Hyatt, says there's one thing we can change that transforms everything else: our minds. Our thoughts drive our actions, and our actions drive our results, which is why if we want different outcomes in life – whether in our relationships, our business, our finances or our happiness – we have to start by looking within. In this episode, Michael explains the inner narrator we all have, a part of us that seeks to make meaning of our lives by interpreting and telling stories about the things that happen to us. The problem? These stories are often untrue or rooted in fear, which creates limiting beliefs that hold us back. Michael shares his three steps for working with the inner narrator and how to choose a more empowering mindset that leads to a life of agency, choice and power. We talk about how to get out of victim, why adversity can open up new possibilities in our lives and how to avoid getting sidetracked by triggers, fear and grief while still being radically honest about our emotions and reality. Listen to discover: ● Why mindset affects everything about our lives ● How to reframe our stories and choose more empowering thoughts ● Michael's three steps to challenging our inner narrator ● How adversity can open up new possibilities in our lives ● Understanding intuition vs. fear ● What triggers are and how not to get sidetracked by them ● The power of taking breaks ● Choosing imagination over worry ● Why failure can be our greatest teacher One of the pillars of being a healthy adult is busting stories and living in fact and truth, which is the key to an empowered mindset. And as Michael shares, even when we have a challenging set of facts, we can still choose the most empowering story for ourselves, reframing adversity and believing in possibilities – and ultimately, in ourselves. "Success begins with your thinking…Getting your thinking right is about 90% of anything. If you have the right thinking, you'll eventually take the right actions that lead to better results." - Michael Hyatt "If you don't like your reality, you have to look at your thinking." - Michelle Chalfant "As long as I was the victim, I was powerless. Once I could stop being defensive and accept the fact that I had agency in the midst of this situation...all the power came back, and it gave me a whole range of options." - Michael Hyatt "Our brains are meaning-seeking machines. We can't live without meaning." - Michael Hyatt "Everything that's happened to you is in the past. You can't change any of it. All you can change is how you interpret it." - Michael Hyatt "The greatest advances in my life have been on the heels of some adversity. I had to have a breakdown to have a breakthrough." - Michael Hyatt "I realized that nothing can trigger me. Only I can trigger me." - Michael Hyatt "Triggers are a gift, because when we're triggered, it's a way for us to uncover an unconscious limiting belief that we have about ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant "Stress is antithetical to good creative thinking." - Michael Hyatt "To take a break can be life changing." - Michelle Chalfant "Worry is basically a distortion of imagination." - Michael Hyatt "Experience is our greatest teacher." - Michelle Chalfant "There's no failure. There's only feedback." - Michael Hyatt LINKS & RESOURCES Michael Hyatt Website "Mind Your Mindset" (Michael Hyatt Book) https://mindyourmindsetbook.com/ Full Focus Planner Michael Hyatt Instagram https://www.instagram.com/michaelhyatt/ Michael Hyatt LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/michaelhyatt Find an Adult Chair® Coach https://theadultchair.com/coaches/ Share Your Love: Review The Adult Chair® Podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adult-chair/id941317634 MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 366: Empaths, Energy and Near Death Experiences with Sarah Weiss | 11 May 2023 | 01:04:39 | |
It's easy to think everyone processes the world the same way we do. After all, we're all born with a mind that is here to help us make sense of our human experience. But what if there is actually a huge range of ways we each make sense of reality – and superpowers to be found in our ways of processing the world?
Empaths are people whose nervous systems are wired with the ability to mirror others around them; in other words, they can actually feel the experiences of others in their own bodies. This is a beautiful gift to offer the world – and it can also present its challenges for empaths who might find themselves exhausted or disconnected from self because of the environment around them.
In this episode, the ever-wise Sarah Weiss breaks down what an empath is, signs you might be an empath and steps you can take to find grounding and peace as an empath. We also explore why our culture needs to do a better job nurturing these types of abilities in people and the clues that reality is bigger than just the physical world we can see – from fascinating stories about near-death experiences to the path of a soul's spiritual growth.
Listen to discover:
As we learn more about consciousness and the complexity of the mind, it's an invitation into the sacred. Mind-expanding experiences, whether a near-death experience or the way your empathetic brain is naturally wired, give us the opportunity to ask bigger questions about God, soul, the universe and our purpose. The fact that we have the consciousness to ask these questions is a gift – a gift that points to a reality bigger than ourselves.
Let this episode expand your mind and take you on an adventure of asking big questions to understand yourself and the world better!
"You're usually born an empath, and then from the very beginning, you don't understand that you are processing the world in a completely different way than most other people are." - Sarah Weiss
"An empath is someone whose nervous system and brain have a certain physiological configuration...that makes us able to mirror how someone else feels physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually." - Sarah Weiss
"I really believe that empaths are a preview of the future human...it's actually an advanced spiritual quality." - Sarah Weiss
"You do have to learn how to ground yourself and find the definition of your being so you actually have a clear understanding of who you are." - Sarah Weiss
"I just don't see how people can really develop their boundaries without learning about energy." - Sarah Weiss
"There is a wounded child inside most empaths." - Sarah Weiss
"It's not a matter of...'I didn't protect myself enough. I was too overly empathetic.'...Is it just that we just need that alone time to recharge?" - Michelle Chalfant
"I really think that we are severely lacking in the understanding around birth and death and...how important it is to understand, to frame this lifetime, to put it in context." - Sarah Weiss
"There's documented research on [near-death experiences] that's out there." - Michelle Chalfant
"As we develop as human beings, we go through natural initiations...If we were living in a culture that honored and recognized these, then we would derive tremendous meaning from them." - Sarah Weiss
"[The dark night of the soul] is there for a reason, and there are lessons to learn and always something to gain. It's hard though, when you're in the middle of it." - Michelle Chalfant
"I have seen profound healing [through plant medicine]. I've witnessed it... But what's so important is that you do it with a skilled practitioner…The integration is where the greatest healing happens." - Michelle Chalfant
"I think being an empath takes you into the sacred. I think the deep meaning of life gets felt by an empath." - Sarah Weiss
LINKS & RESOURCES
Sarah Weiss Website https://www.spirithealonline.com/
Episode #21: Grounding and the Energy of the Earth with Sarah Weiss https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/21-grounding-and-the-energy-of-the-earth-with-sarah-weiss/
Episode #135: The Enlightened Empath with Sarah Weiss https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/135-the-enlightened-empath-with-sarah-weiss/
MORE ADULT CHAIR
The Adult Chair® Website
The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/
The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification
STAY CONNECTED
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/
The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/
| |||
| 365: How to stay connected to your true self | 04 May 2023 | 00:25:20 | |
I believe that we are born as beautiful, pure beings, connected to God/Source and full of love – our true selves. Though we never lose our true essence, throughout our lives, we have experiences that wound us and we put on masks to feel safe in this world. This creates a sort of "false self" that covers up who we were really meant to be. But I believe all of us can reconnect with our true selves – our Adult Chairs – and in doing so, live more authentic, peaceful and intuitive lives. This is the heart of The Adult Chair® model and a conscious choice we must make every day! In this episode, I'm sharing some practical ways you can live connected to your true self, including how to notice and work with the challenges that try to disconnect you from who you really are. Listen to discover: ● What connection to self means ● Why staying connected to the true self is so important ● The things that disconnect us from our true self ● The power of feeling our emotions and working with triggers ● The way our daily choices impact our connection with self As I share in a personal story in this show, there will always be someone or something that triggers us, distracts us or tries to pull us away from ourselves. But staying connected to self is a choice! We can decide that no one will take us away from us. And as always, remember this is a journey, and each moment of challenge is an opportunity to notice where you are on your path and how far you've come. You've got this! There really is no better way to live. "At the root of The Adult Chair is our true self." - Michelle Chalfant "Your true self is underneath all these masks, these limiting beliefs." - Michelle Chalfant "When I'm connected to my true self, I'm connected to my inner compass." - Michelle Chalfant "When I'm connected with my true self, I have a connection with God, Source." - Michelle Chalfant "Every time that you sit and work with these triggers and you don't let them take you down, every time you work with them, that trigger begins to lose its power." - Michelle Chalfant "When we're triggered, there's something in it for us." - Michelle Chalfant "A trigger is something we carry with us." - Michelle Chalfant "Holding that connection to the true self, which means staying in our Adult Chair no matter what, is the healthiest place for us to live. It's the most authentic place to live. And it takes work." - Michelle Chalfant "I am not allowing anybody to disconnect me from myself." - Michelle Chalfant "The world reflects where we are. The world is our mirror." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Summer 2023 Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Doors Close Soon! https://theadultchair.com/certification Episode #364: How To Work With Triggers and Parts https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/364/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 364: How To Work With Triggers and Parts | 27 Apr 2023 | 00:30:47 | |
Guess what? I got triggered this week. AND I was able to work through the trigger and meet the most beautiful younger part of myself using the tools in The Adult Chair® model. In this episode, I'm letting you guys in on exactly what happened and walking you step-by-step through how I transformed this trigger — and how you can use the exact same process the next time you're triggered. It all started with a relatively simple interaction with my husband, Graham. Though we didn't have a fight, this interaction brought up feelings of anger and rage in me. As I dug into those feelings, I found that a 10-year-old part of me was feeling really scared and unsafe because the interaction reminded her of an unpredictable situation from childhood. And what happened afterwards was SO POWERFUL that it still gives me chills! Listen to discover: ● What triggers are and where they come from ● Why triggers are a HUGE opportunity to heal ● The step-by-step trigger tool I used to transform my trigger ● A powerful script for working with younger, scared parts of self ● How working with triggers can lead to healthier relationships The really cool thing is that instead of letting my anger create a fight between Graham and me, we were able to have a really authentic conversation about what happened, and I left feeling seen and supported. This is the power of doing our work! I wanted to openly share this story to not only equip you with the tools to work through a trigger, but also to show you that the goal isn't to "arrive" or "stop getting triggered." The goal is to do the lifelong work of turning inward to get to know and transform ourselves so we can connect more deeply with self and others. "There are tools within this model that help us to heal and transform whatever is going on in our lives." - Michelle Chalfant "We have so many parts that are within us. So, when you get triggered, remember, it's an unconscious belief that's rising up inside of [you]." - Michelle Chalfant "Triggers are an opportunity for us to see what is unknown within ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant "Oftentimes anger and rage...it's a defense against a more vulnerable emotion." - Michelle Chalfant "Our emotions oftentimes are stacked." - Michelle Chalfant "Nobody can make you feel anything. How you feel is already within you." - Michelle Chalfant "Working with triggers is such an important thing to help us to heal and live with emotional balance…Working with triggers is a way to stay connected to yourself." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Summer 2023 Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Doors Now Open! https://theadultchair.com/certification MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 363: Creating Healthier Relationships with Linda and Charlie Bloom | 20 Apr 2023 | 01:07:49 | |
Are you ready to have all your relationship questions answered by not one, but two couples therapists…who also happen to be a couple themselves? Linda and Charlie Bloom are psychotherapists who have been married to each other for more than 50 years, and in this week's episode, they're spilling all their secrets about how to have healthy relationships – secrets from both their clinical training and their personal experience of building their marriage. This discussion is like getting weeks of counseling in just one hour! We cover topics like: the role of self-worth in a relationship, how our partners can help us heal childhood wounding, the importance of asking for what we want and need, how to navigate conflict in a healthy way, what to do and not do during an argument, how to repair broken trust, what to do when your partner doesn't want to work on the relationship and the underutilized habits that create great relationships. Though this is PACKED with information, we don't just talk about concepts but give you practical advice on what to do in these situations, from how to hack your brain for more productive conflict to how to appeal to your partner's self-interest to get the relationship you want. Listen to discover: ● The surprising connection between self-worth and healthy relationships ● Why some people have trouble receiving love ● The importance of asking for what we want and need ● Why we marry people like our parents ● How to have healthy conflict in your relationship ● The three words you should never say in an argument ● How to get out of threat and fear states during conflict ● What "committed listening" is and how to show up with more presence ● What is required to rebuild trust when it's been broken ● What to do if your partner doesn't want to work on the relationship ● The most underutilized practice in relationships My favorite takeaway from this episode is that the key to having better relationships is believing it is possible. It's so easy to get caught up in frustration, resentment and conflict and give up on a relationship that has potential (did you know most couples divorce without ever seeking therapy?). But we have so much power in our hands to change the dance of our relationships and make them work. Though it takes two to tango and some relationships do end, Linda and Charlie give hopeful advice that will help you fight for your relationship instead of fighting with your partner – grounded in their own story of healing conflict and growing their love year after year. "We can never give any more acceptance and appreciation to somebody else than we can give to ourselves...We can't give that experience of worth to another person if we haven't internalized it within ourselves." - Charlie Bloom "We learn to love ourselves through relationships." - Charlie Bloom "Don't expect [your partner] to know what's going on with you emotionally. That's your job to share with them what you need." - Michelle Chalfant "When I grew some courage and started to ask [for what I wanted], I got loved in the way I wanted to be loved." - Linda Bloom "There's a part of us that I think is innate within all human beings to want to feel whole, to want to feel integrated." - Charlie Bloom "If we can appeal to the other person's self-interest, that sometimes helps them to get over their conflict phobia." - Linda Bloom "One-hundred percent of the time, defensiveness is activated by fear." - Charlie Bloom "Starting a conversation or an argument with 'you, you, you,' I call it throwing the shield up...That's not a conversation. It's defensiveness." - Michelle Chalfant "A lot of people, they think good communication is required for a good relationship. But they think about speaking. They don't think about the other side and how important the listening is." - Linda Bloom "One of the statistics that breaks my heart is that most people who get divorced never go to one couple's counseling session." - Linda Bloom "If you can respect your partner and what their path is, then all is well." - Michelle Chalfant "Of course we're going to have differences, but they don't have to turn into arguments and conflict." - Linda Bloom LINKS & RESOURCES Linda and Charlie Bloom Website "An End to Arguing" (Linda and Charlie Bloom Book) https://www.amazon.com/End-Arguing-Valuable-Lessons-Relationships/dp/1646638085 Linda and Charlie Bloom Facebook https://www.facebook.com/lindaandcharliebloom Linda and Charlie Bloom Instagram https://www.instagram.com/linda_charlie_bloom/ Summer 2023 Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Doors Now Open! Use code SUMMER2023 to save $1,500 by April 23 https://theadultchair.com/certification Headspace Try free for 30 days MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 362: Guiding Your Kids Into Their Adult Chair with Blake Chalfant | 13 Apr 2023 | 00:58:23 | |
One of the things I get asked about the most is how parents can help their children grow up to be healthy adults. How do you set your kids up to naturally slide into their Adult Chair, while they are still literally children and adolescents? I decided to put myself out there and talk with my son, Blake – who is now a young adult and coaching clients of his own – about his experiences growing up and what he believes is most important in helping kids get into their Adult Chairs. In this vulnerable and authentic conversation, we talk about both of our experiences during Blake's childhood, from the work I had to do around my own triggers and codependency to the delicate dance parents need between boundaries and allowing their children to have experiences and make mistakes that shape them. Blake also shares that most of the young people he works with feel isolated and like they're not enough, leading them to look for external validation. He talks about how, through honesty, safety and unconditional love, parents can help kids navigate the unique cultural challenges of their time and address the most common questions in every human's heart: "Who am I?" "Am I loved?" "Am I enough?" Listen to discover: ● The balance between surrender and boundaries in parenting ● How to encourage your kids to talk to you and open up to you ● Demonstrating unconditional love, even when you have to discipline your kids ● The common thing all young people (and humans) struggle with ● The greatest gift you can give your kids ● How to help your kids feel their emotions ● Some of the unique challenges that kids today are facing, including porn and technology Blake was growing up during my years of private practice and working with The Adult Chair® model, so I think this is a beautiful story of what happens when parents and children are willing to learn and grow together. I'm so proud of who Blake is today, and I hope this encourages you that you don't have to be a "perfect" parent or have "perfect" kids to raise children who become healthy adults – all you need to do is show up with presence, a lot of love and your own Adult Chair. "Most of the time, people really don't want advice, but what you can do is just offer what you have to say without an expectation." - Blake Chalfant "The culture that we're raising kids in today is scary in some ways. And is not healthy." - Blake Chalfant "We have to surrender, but there has to be a balance of boundaries as well." - Michelle Chalfant "There's a very fine line between things that are gonna really come back to bite them in the ass and then your own projections of how you think they should be." - Blake Chalfant "No one feels like they're enough from a very young age, and we spent the rest of our life trying to fill that void with external validation." - Blake Chalfant "I think that's important too: owning your mistake, apologizing, cause you're modeling that for the kid." - Michelle Chalfant "These beautiful children are with you for a reason." - Michelle Chalfant "You can unconditionally love and support your kids while having extremely firm boundaries." - Blake Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Blake Chalfant Website Blake Chalfant Instagram https://www.instagram.com/blake.chalfant Blake Chalfant YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@BlakeChalfant11 Summer 2023 Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Doors Now Open! https://theadultchair.com/certification MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 475: The Healthy Way to End a Relationship | 11 Sep 2025 | 00:20:53 | |
Not every relationship is meant to last forever. Friendships, partnerships, even family or work connections can shift. Sometimes the healthiest choice is to let them go. But how do you do that with compassion, clarity, and grace? In this episode, I'm sharing how to recognize when a relationship has run its course, what it means from a soul-growth perspective, and how to navigate endings without blame, shame, or judgment. You'll also learn how to move forward with self-compassion and confidence, even when grief arises. In this episode, I cover:
Resources from this Episode: The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE! Join me LIVE in Boone, NC, at The Art of Living Retreat Center. Click here to learn more!
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 361: Healing Trauma and Re-awakening Your Soul with Dr. Elisa Hallerman | 06 Apr 2023 | 01:07:52 | |
We know that trauma and addiction affect the brain and body in so many ways. But when Dr. Elisa Hallerman overcame addiction and began working with others in recovery, she realized there was something big missing in the conversation about trauma and addiction: how it affects the soul. This inspired her to create a new paradigm for talking about sobriety called "Soulbriety," and it's changing the game for how people heal. In this episode, Dr. Hallerman shares all about what the soul is and how we can heal it from trauma, how she worked through her pain (and how you can too) and how to navigate a "dark night of the soul" to bring greater healing and wisdom into our lives. She also talks about the different types of trauma, how they affect the body and brain and what trauma healing modalities are most effective for different situations. This episode is PACKED with practical information about healing trauma and addiction along with beautiful explanations of how our souls work and the journey each soul takes to grow in wisdom and maturity. Listen to discover:
If you have experienced trauma of any kind or find yourself in a difficult season of growth, this episode will give you hope, a higher perspective and helpful next steps to turn pain into purpose.
LINKS & RESOURCES Dr. Elisa Hallerman Website Dr. Elisa Hallerman Instagram "Soulbriety" (Dr. Elisa Hallerman Book) The Adult Chair® Live – April 14-15, 2023 MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 360: Listening to Your Heart to Find Out Who You Are with Dr. Jeremy Goldberg | 30 Mar 2023 | 01:01:13 | |
Throughout our lives, we hear so many voices of others telling us who and how we should be. Societal norms, our parents, our partners…it can feel like everyone wants something for us and from us. To cope with this, we develop limiting beliefs, survival strategies and masks that we wear. We start to think these things are really who we are, and they become our roadmap for life…unless we find the courage to look within and discover who we really want to be. In this episode, I talk with fellow life coach and kindness curator, Dr. Jeremy Goldberg, about how we can break out of the boxes that the world tries to put us in, find what we want in life and create a new reality of kindness on the planet. We talk about how to listen to your "heart whispers" instead of fear, what intuition does (and doesn't) sound like, the role of the ego and the one thing you can do today to break through limiting beliefs. Jeremy is a master of making these big concepts simple through great metaphors and analogies that will help you find more authenticity and peace within. Listen to discover:
Being human is hard, and we're all trying to figure it out one day at a time. When we take the brave step to find our true self, live with compassion and treat our fellow humans with kindness, we not only change our lives…we can change the world! "I believe that beliefs are choices." - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg "People may not know who they are, but they do know that they're not living the life that makes them peaceful. They know that they're not living from their true self." - Michelle Chalfant "We're all human, and we all have the same exact problems." - Michelle Chalfant "Sometimes if we're unclear about what we do want, we can approach that same thing from the opposite trajectory, which is, 'What do you NOT want?'" - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg "It's really hard to change the picture when you're living in the frame." - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg "Heart whispers, and fear shouts." - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg "The mind is really loud. Our brains are megaphones of fear, comparison, criticism and judgment. And so, my advice would be to get still and feel God." - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg "Intuition doesn't come at you with all this fear and screaming at you." - Michelle Chalfant "It's undeniable that your upbringing affects your life. It affects your nervous system. It affects the way that you see the world around you." - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg "I think a lot of people chase happiness instead of allowing wholeness." - Dr. Jeremy Goldberg LINKS & RESOURCES Dr. Jeremy Goldberg Website https://www.longdistancelovebombs.com/ Dr. Jeremy Goldberg Instagram https://www.instagram.com/longdistancelovebombs/ Long Distance Love Bombs Podcast (Dr. Jeremy Goldberg Podcast) https://www.longdistancelovebombs.com/podcast "It'll Be Okay, and You Will Be Too." (Dr. Jeremy Goldberg Book) https://www.amazon.com/Itll-Okay-You-Will-Too/dp/0692624724 The Adult Chair® Live – April 14-15, 2023 Attend in-person in Charlotte, NC or Virtually https://theadultchair.com/charlotte/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 359: Why and How To Feel Your Emotions | 23 Mar 2023 | 00:32:28 | |
In my 25 years of private practice, the #1 issue I worked on with clients was feeling their emotions. Whether someone was anxious, reactive and raging or numb to the world, the question they were all asking was, "What the heck do I do with these emotions?" I've been there too. And it breaks my heart, because experiencing emotions is one of the gifts of being human. But the good news is that all of us can reclaim this part of ourselves and learn to feel our emotions. And when we do, it unlocks all kinds of possibilities in life! In this episode, I'm breaking down why it's so important that we learn to feel our emotions and some practical ways to do that. I'm also addressing some of the common fears and discomfort around feeling emotions (like, "What if I get stuck in this emotion?") and helping you understand why this is your birthright – and how it can improve your relationships, your intuition and your life! Listen to discover: ● Why it's so important to feel your emotions ● Why most humans struggle with this ● Four practical ways to feel your emotions ● How to connect with your inner child ● How to overcome blocks in feeling emotions No one is born without emotions, but along the way, we learn to suppress them – and in turn, disconnect from who we really are. Feeling emotions is the key to connecting back to yourself and one of the foundational pillars of being a healthy adult. I hope this episode helps guide you back to this essential part of you. "We'd have a completely different world if we were all able to tune into what our emotions are." - Michelle Chalfant "We become whole humans when we feel our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "We're all born to feel emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "When we feel our emotions, it is a gateway into our intuition. We have enhanced intuition when we are in tune with and know what we are feeling emotionally." - Michelle Chalfant "Instead of asking yourself, 'What do I think?" ask yourself, "What do I feel?'" - Michelle Chalfant "Empathy is when we're able to tune into another person and feel what they're feeling. It's a beautiful skill to have." - Michelle Chalfant "Connecting with the inner child is simply activating an energy." - Michelle Chalfant "There's so much power in feeling our emotions." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Free Inner Child Resource https://theadultchair.com/innerchild BRAND NEW: The Adult Chair® Live – April 14-15, 2023 Attend in-person in Charlotte, NC or Virtually https://theadultchair.com/charlotte/ Headspace Try it free for 30 days https://www.headspace.com/adult30 MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 358: Creating a Healthy Blended Family with Amber Jones | 16 Mar 2023 | 00:55:38 | |
You just met the new love of your life, and after a season of single parenting, you're so excited to build a life with your new partner and create a beautiful blended family. But you don't just have yourself to think about. Between their kids, your kids, exes and in-laws, forming new bonds and creating healthy dynamics can be, well, complicated. Not only do you want to be a great parent or stepparent to your blended family, but you're also navigating brand new territory with your partner, from different parenting styles to setting healthy boundaries. Certified Adult Chair® Coach, Amber Jones, has lived this as a mom and stepmom to a blended family of six children, and in this show, she drops a wealth of wisdom on how to create connected blended families from your Adult Chair. We talk about the nitty gritty of boundaries with exes, building relationships with stepchildren, parenting roles, when to introduce your children to a new partner, and how to deepen your relationship with your partner. And, like everything in The Adult Chair®, we know that the true work happens within, so Amber also walks us through how to work with our own triggers, the importance of self-worth and why navigating blended family dynamics can be such a beautiful opportunity to work on ourselves. Listen to discover:
Amber is a wonderful relationship coach, and whether you're part of a blended family, considering dating again, dating someone with children or just looking to strengthen your relationship, kids or no kids, this episode is for you! "We both really believe that the relationship is the foundation of the whole family." - Amber Jones "You have to be a unified front." - Michelle Chalfant "Your self-worth has to be very intact. You have to know that you're worthy and that your partner loves you and that you're good enough." - Amber Jones "I think that when it comes to exes, it's really the responsibility of the partner whose ex it is to manage and handle the ex. " - Amber Jones "You've got to be #1 on each other's list." - Michelle Chalfant "The biggest problems that I see are because of other people outside of the relationship causing issues within the relationship." - Amber Jones "I think there's so much power in those words of just saying, 'I believe you. I believe your experience.'" - Amber Jones "Triggers are a gift because they show us our inner beliefs about ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Amber Jones Website https://www.amberjonescoaching.com/ Amber Jones Instagram https://instagram.com/amberjonescoaching/ Episode #98: Transforming Triggers https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/98-transforming-triggers/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 357: 5 Steps to Empathy with Rob Volpe | 09 Mar 2023 | 00:40:21 | |
We've all felt it: the extra tense political discussions, the harsh climate on social media and the overall division between people. It often feels like half the planet is living in a different world and we just can't seem to understand each other. This isn't just in our heads. Studies show that empathy has declined 40% since 1979, and today, one third of people say they can't easily see the point of view of somebody else. We have to learn how to listen, hear and respect each other again. The good news is that we can all learn empathy! My guest today, Rob Volpe, has mastered the art of empathy both in his personal relationships and through his work in market research. Since his job is all about listening to people and creating connections, he's learned to identify the specific attitudes and behaviors that help people hear each other and feel heard – and he's here today to empower us with five simple steps to building more empathy in our life and world! Listen to discover: ● What empathy actually is ● The wonderful things empathy can fuel in our lives ● The difference between emotional empathy and cognitive empathy ● What to do if you have a partner who doesn't have a lot of empathy ● The difference between empathy and agreement ● Shocking stats about the decline in empathy ● The factors driving our current empathy crisis ● 5 steps to build more empathy today Empathy is something we talk a lot about but have trouble defining and practicing. We also tend to think it's a quality someone either has or doesn't – when in reality, we are all capable of empathy, and we all need to consistently practice our empathy skills. You don't have to naturally feel the emotions of others to be empathetic. By setting aside our judgments, asking good questions and listening with curiosity, we can stop talking past each other and learn how to really love each other, even when we disagree! "Empathy as it's defined is about connecting with other people on either an emotional or a cognitive level to understand the lived experience of somebody else as if you were them." - Rob Volpe "Empathy is needed for healthy relationships." - Michelle Chalfant "We just want to be seen, heard and know that we're enough." - Rob Volpe "It's not about agreeing. It's about witnessing and really seeing and hearing them." - Michelle Chalfant "One third of adults could not easily see the point of view of other people." - Rob Volpe "We're living what I call 'chin up'...and when we're chin up and living in the head space, we're ready to defend. We're not listening." - Michelle Chalfant "We just need to take the time to listen to one another and hear what the other person is saying and not be so defensive." - Rob Volpe LINKS & RESOURCES Rob Volpe Website https://www.5stepstoempathy.com/ "Tell Me More About That" (Rob Volpe book) https://www.amazon.com/Tell-More-About-That-Conversation/dp/1774580896 Rob Volpe Instagram https://www.instagram.com/empathy_activist/ Rob Volpe TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@empathyactivist The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 356: A Raw Conversation About Sobriety with Laura McKowen | 02 Mar 2023 | 00:56:04 | |
Cheers. Salud. Skol. Wherever you are in the world, it seems like alcohol punctuates every celebration. But have we stopped to ask if alcohol is really good for us? Or have we paused to get curious about why we drink – and when it moves from genuine enjoyment to unhealthy numbing out? Recently, I've noticed more people having conversations about sobriety, from giving up drinking entirely to swapping a few cocktails for mocktails, and I thought it was time we talked about alcohol through the lens of The Adult Chair®. In this episode, I'm chatting with Laura McKowen, who has written extensively about getting sober and runs a global sobriety support community. She openly and vulnerably shares her story of using alcohol to numb her emotions, why and how she got sober and what her life looks like now. We talked about how our culture normalizes excessive drinking, all the emotions that come up when getting sober and ways to tell if you might have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. If you're at all "sober curious," you're going to love hearing her perspective! Listen to discover: ● Laura's story of getting sober and why she chose to stop drinking ● How drinking culture normalizes excessive drinking ● Busting health myths about alcohol ● The connection between alcohol and anxiety ● How Laura's life got better when she got sober ● The way we use alcohol to numb our emotions ● How to develop a healthier relationship with alcohol, whether you choose to cut it out completely or enjoy it in moderation Like everything in The Adult Chair, we aren't talking in terms of "do" or "don't" or "good" or "bad," but about bringing consciousness into the decisions we make. My goal for this show is not to tell you to stop drinking, but to encourage you to take a closer look at when you drink, why you drink and how you drink so you can truly live life to the fullest: present, awake and alive! "I knew I liked to drink a little too much. I loved it a little too much." - Laura McKowen [When offered a drink after a bad day] "I don't want a glass of wine. I would like to come talk to you about my emotions though." - Michelle Chalfant "We end up recreating our life in a way that decenters alcohol...my life is still my life." - Laura McKowen "When you are drinking even a little more than you want to, it keeps you from facing the truth." - Laura McKowen "Alcohol provides a really great shield to just sort of skim across the top of life." - Laura McKowen "I was in a lot of emotional pain. I know that's exactly why I reached for alcohol." - Michelle Chalfant "We don't get away with not feeling things. It goes somewhere." - Laura McKowen "Shame disconnects us from our humanity and the humanity in other people." - Laura McKowen "The not drinking wasn't the cure....it was actually connecting with other people in a meaningful way and healing in relationship with people that allowed me to heal." - Laura McKowen LINKS & RESOURCES Laura McKowen Website Laura McKowen Instagram https://www.instagram.com/laura_mckowen/ "Push Off From Here" (Laura McKowen Book) https://www.lauramckowen.com/books The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 355: Cultivating Friendships as an Adult with Dr. Marisa G. Franco | 23 Feb 2023 | 00:42:40 | |
There is an old Irish proverb that says, "A good friend is like a four-leaf clover; hard to find and lucky to have." While some people thrive in a big group and others prefer to have a few close friends, there isn't a human on the planet who doesn't need friends! But making friends seems to get harder as we get older. Gone are the days of finding a BFF because you happened to sit next to each other on the school bus. Friendship in adulthood takes intentional effort. In this episode, I talk to psychologist and friendship expert, Dr. Marisa G. Franco, about how to create deep, meaningful relationships as an adult. We talk about why love is so much more than just romantic partnerships, how our attachment style impacts our friendships and the "recipe" for a deep friendship. Dr. Franco shares lots of practical tips on how to feel more confident in social situations, places to make new friends, conversation starters and how to get over the fear of rejection. Listen to discover: ● The importance and power of friendship ● How your attachment style impacts how you make friends ● How to make friends as an adult ● The ingredients required for organic friendships to form ● The "liking gap" and how it impacts the way we show up with others ● A method for initiating conversation ● Why you shouldn't fear rejection Though busy schedules, family commitments and adult responsibilities can make friendship more difficult, connection really boils down to two things: repeated interactions and shared vulnerability. When we understand this, along with our own attachment style, we can take conscious steps to find our people – no matter where we are in life. "How we've connected has shaped who we are...then who you are affects how you connect." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "Research finds, for example, that even learning about attachment theory shifts your attachment a bit." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "Being secure is not about never feeling insecure. It's about having an alternative secure voice too and leaning into or buying into the more secure side of you." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "That's one of my biggest tips when it comes to making friends: assume people like you when it's ambiguous." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "When we really work with our attachment styles, it can really just change the whole way we see the world." - Michelle Chalfant "If you're an adult and you don't have that [infrastructure for meeting new people] anymore, you can't assume it's going to happen organically. You have to try." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "Find a community that's going to give you repeated unplanned interaction and shared vulnerability." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "You also have to overcome covert avoidance. And covert avoidance is our tendency to show up physically but check out mentally." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "People are less likely to reject you than you think." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "It's not so much about what you say. It's about the fact that you are opening up conversation." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "Rejection is just part of the process of connection." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "I think we need to remind ourselves too that if someone doesn't like us, it might have nothing to do with us." - Michelle Chalfant "I think there are so many ways that sometimes what we think is a rejection, the other person is actually thinking of as consideration." - Dr. Marisa G. Franco "Oftentimes, it's not about us. It's about something that other person is going through." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Dr. Marisa G. Franco Website "Platonic" (Dr. Marisa G. Franco book) https://drmarisagfranco.com/about/platonic-the-book/ Dr. Marisa G. Franco Instagram https://www.instagram.com/drmarisagfranco/ The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy HelloFresh Use code ADULT65 for 65% off + free shipping MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 354: Balancing Your Hormones for a Healthier Life with Candace Burch | 16 Feb 2023 | 01:08:30 | |
There are so many different aspects of being an emotionally healthy adult. We're complex, connected beings, and our bodies, our minds, our emotions, our spiritual lives…they all play a role in how we feel every day. It all matters! One of the areas we don't talk about enough is our hormones. Hormones impact SO many of our bodily and mental functions, and we've been kept in the dark about them for too long! Everyone deserves to understand this part of themselves! In this episode, I talk to hormone health educator Candace Burch to help us understand all things hormones…and wow, is she a WEALTH of information! We talk about how hormones impact our lives from our teenage years all the way through menopause, the symptoms of hormonal imbalances and all the related topics when it comes to hormones: birth control, fertility, anxiety, acne, PCOS, stress and SO much more. You will walk away with a much better understanding of the role of each hormone in your body and the empowered choices you have when it comes to balancing your hormones. Listen to discover:
This show focuses on female hormones since they are so complex, but I hope it is helpful for all of us to recognize that our internal chemistry and the cyclical nature of our bodies are not to be ignored. When we learn to work with our bodies, trust our intuitions and get support when we're feeling out of balance, we can take more ownership of our health through every stage of life. "Painful periods are not normal." - Candace Burch "So many women are not aware of the symptoms or they become their symptoms." - Candace Burch "The whole concept of hormone imbalance is relatively new." - Candace Burch "Ovulation disruption is one of the big reasons people become hormonally imbalanced." - Candace Burch "When you talk about health or hormonal health in any case, it's always about nutrient dense proteins, good nutrition." - Candace Burch "That's key: keeping blood sugar stable." - Candace Burch "There's this inevitable road to hormones shifting, but they shouldn't be shifting like a roller coaster." - Candace Burch "I think a lot of people don't even know how to relax anymore." - Candace Burch "The adrenals are key to everything really." - Candace Burch "There are not a lot of studies with intermittent fasting with women." - Michelle Chalfant "Progesterone is the great balancing hormone." - Candace Burch "Estrogen has so many functions. We need it." - Candace Burch "I'm a fan of hormone replenishment when testing takes place first, in measured doses." - Candace Burch "High cortisol at night is really problematic." - Candace Burch "I think most PCOS is very much linked to insulin resistance and an imbalance of blood sugar." - Candace Burch "Anyone that has PCOS doesn't need to feel helpless and hopeless." - Candace Burch "I think women have to trust their intuition." - Candace Burch LINKS & RESOURCES Candace Burch Website https://www.yourhormonebalance.com/ Use code ADULTCHAIR50 for $50 off hormone testing Your Hormone Balance Instagram https://www.instagram.com/yourhormonebalance The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Michellechalfant
| |||
| 353: How To Empower Yourself To Set Healthy Boundaries: Rebecca's Story | 09 Feb 2023 | 00:35:30 | |
When it comes to standing up for ourselves and setting boundaries, there are few places where this is tougher than with our family of origin. Family brings a whole different dynamic to the table: our foundational attachments, our childhood programming, group expectations and our natural loyalty to our parents. The most successful and strongest people I know can still fall into old patterns or feel like younger versions of themselves around their parents and family. In this episode, I'm talking to my friend, Rebecca, whose family would often criticize her when she would set boundaries. Despite being a successful adult and parent herself, Rebecca often felt small and at the whim of her parents' emotions. After a conflict around this issue, Rebecca was invited to a holiday gathering with her mom and dad, and she decided it was time to take empowered steps to change her family dynamics. She turned inward and got clear about what her boundaries were and her plan in case her boundaries were crossed – and she had an entirely different experience at that get together! She connected to a deep sense of self-worth, power and her ability to take care of herself that still radiates from her today. In this show, she's sharing how she did it using The Adult Chair® model and how you can do it too! Listen to discover: ● How Rebecca learned to stand up for herself and change her family dynamics ● The inner work Rebecca did to get clear on her boundaries ● What an embodied boundary feels like ● Why taking care of ourselves and setting boundaries can lead to healthier relationships What I love about Rebecca's approach is she didn't just ask herself what her boundaries were; she asked herself how she wanted to feel. This helped her stay connected to herself, and it gave her an embodied sense of strength and power. You can feel her grounded energy just listening to this conversation, and she has so many amazing takeaways to share with us – this one is a must listen! "I didn't know what a true boundary was before all of this." - Rebecca "My parents never respected me as an adult." - Rebecca "If they were happy, I was happy." - Rebecca "I don't like labels, but it does help us to understand why people show up the way they do." - Michelle Chalfant "I need to take care of myself because no one will take care of me." - Rebecca "We can't set effective, strong, clear boundaries if we don't know what we value inside and who we are on the inside." - Michelle Chalfant "No one is going to make me feel any other way than how I want to feel. And if they do, it's not selfish to not want to be here." - Rebecca "I hear someone that is choosing their reality versus allowing others to dictate their reality." - Michelle Chalfant "I have the power to change this. I just have to work. That's the thing – you have to work." - Rebecca "Words are powerful...I want my children to understand your words can take you places and can move mountains and can make you feel amazing, if you know how you want to feel." - Rebecca "Unless you have the energy within, then you can't set a firm boundary." - Michelle Chalfant "What's ok for you doesn't have to be ok for anybody else." - Rebecca LINKS & RESOURCES The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 352: A Holistic Approach to Anxiety with Dr. Ellen Vora | 02 Feb 2023 | 01:00:50 | |
Our society today is facing an epidemic of anxiety. Despite technology that promises to make our lives faster and easier, it seems that we're more anxious than ever. In 2020, Google searches for "anxiety" reached an all-time high. We have to look beyond the diagnosis of anxiety and seek to find the root cause of why so many people are living with such high stress and dysregulation that are creating anxiety. There is something bigger going on here. And since we're whole humans, we need to look at the whole picture – mind, body and spirit – when thinking about how we heal and manage anxiety. My guest on this show, Dr. Ellen Vora, is a psychiatrist who takes a functional medicine approach to anxiety, looking at mental health factors and physical health factors, such as sleep, digestion and blood sugar, that can add up to throw us out of balance and contribute to feelings of anxiety. She also helps us to distinguish between feelings of anxiety that come from a physical imbalance vs. true anxiety, which comes from our inner compass telling us something truly isn't ok. Listen to discover:
We need to start taking a "layered" approach to treating and managing anxiety by looking at the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual elements of our lives and how they work together to create stress or health. This hopeful approach to anxiety empowers us all to make choices that support our well-being, even in the face of real personal and mental health challenges. "I was sort of taking the temperature of our society, and the temperature right now is anxiety." - Dr. Ellen Vora "False anxiety is anxiety that is not our true essence." - Dr. Ellen Vora "It's not just one thing that we have to look at." - Michelle Chalfant "Genes plays a role, but that keeps a lot of us feeling stuck and feeling destined to be anxious....it's more dynamic than we appreciate." - Dr. Ellen Vora "Our problems, our stressors are still valid. It's just that if we had a snack and our blood sugar was more stable in that moment, we would be more resilient in the face of our stressors." - Dr. Ellen Vora "Our mind is the consummate meaning maker." - Dr. Ellen Vora "It's not like we have to dramatically change everything that we do, but we just want to make informed choices." - Dr. Ellen Vora "We don't get to gluten free or decaf coffee our way out of our true anxiety." - Dr. Ellen Vora "I would have my clients sit in their bodies and feel what was going on, and their physical symptoms would start to change." - Michelle Chalfant "[Anxiety] is the physical manifestation of unfelt emotions." - Michelle Chalfant "It's our body that's able to listen and really dial in and tap into a deeper knowing." - Dr. Ellen Vora "It's turning toward the anxiety instead of turning away from." - Michelle Chalfant "We reach outside of ourselves to 'fix us'…and it doesn't end it. We've gotta get to the root." - Michelle Chalfant "We need to change our narrative of what is materially possible." - Dr. Ellen Vora "We're never stuck. We are never broken." - Dr. Ellen Vora LINKS & RESOURCES Dr. Ellen Vora Website Dr. Ellen Vora Instagram https://www.instagram.com/ellenvoramd/ "The Anatomy of Anxiety" (Dr. Ellen Vora book) https://www.amazon.com/Anatomy-Anxiety-Understanding-Overcoming-Response/dp/0063075091 The Self-Worth Meditation Bundle https://theadultchair.com/worthy MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 474: From Empty Nest to New Beginnings | 04 Sep 2025 | 00:23:01 | |
When our kids leave the nest, we're left with a house that feels quieter, emptier, and sometimes unbearably still. This transition can stir up grief, loss, and confusion about who we are without the daily role of being "mom" or "dad" at the center of our lives. In this episode, I'm talking about the very real experience of empty nest syndrome and how to navigate it with compassion and consciousness. No one prepares us for this season of life, but it can also be an opportunity to reconnect with ourselves, process our emotions, and step into a new chapter with purpose. In this episode, I cover:
Resources from this Episode: The Adult Chair book is NOW AVAILABLE! Join me LIVE in Boone, NC, at The Art of Living Retreat Center. Click here to learn more! Get 20% off at Aquatru.com with promo code: MCSHOW
MORE MICHELLE CHALFANT Website: https://www.michellechalfant.com Membership: The Academy of Awakening Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair | |||
| 351: Perfectionism and People Pleasing Broken Down with Amy Green Smith | 26 Jan 2023 | 00:48:46 | |
Do you envy people who can speak up for themselves easily – without stress or guilt? Or do you wish you could go through life with more freedom – not always worried about what others think or if you're getting it right, being able to make mistakes and move on? If you struggle with perfectionism and people pleasing, this type of life might feel like just a dream. But the truth is that perfectionism and people pleasing are just parts of you – parts that have a good reason for being there. And when you understand how they got there, the role they serve and the attention they need, you can transform them…and live that free, bold, courageous life you long for! In this episode, I'm chatting with life coach Amy Green Smith about her journey of overcoming people pleasing and perfectionism, building self-confidence, learning to speak up for herself and creating a life filled with joy! Amy breaks down why perfectionism and people pleasing are both survival strategies that we learned to keep us safe and how they are connected to beliefs about ourselves. We talked about practical ways to start shifting these beliefs, set boundaries, cultivate more authenticity and boldly stand up for ourselves with kindness! Listen to discover:
I love the way that Amy connects all of the topics in this episode back to self-worth. Boundaries, accepting compliments and true connection with others are all important because they are part of our self-worth. She also models how standing up for ourselves isn't confrontational and can be done with radical acceptance…even with people we strongly disagree with. If you're ready to understand why you people please or why you feel like you have to be perfect – and what you can do to begin to shift these patterns in your life – press "play" now for a fun, insightful show! "Both perfectionism and people pleasing are symptoms. They're manifestations of a deeper-seated belief about self." - Amy Green Smith "People pleasing is genuinely anytime we are so highly invested in the opinions of other people that we actually shapeshift, twist and contort at a cost to self." - Amy Green Smith "It's rooted a lot in us just genuinely wanting to take care of ourselves." - Amy Green Smith "One of our primary human needs is for one of belonging." - Amy Green Smith "We have emotional feelings that don't feel great, we try to rectify them with physical feelings." - Amy Green Smith "People pleasing is actually a defense mechanism. It's an iteration of our fawn response." - Amy Green Smith "Do not let your silence make you a liar." - Amy Green Smith "Is there anyone that I'm always frustrated with, that I'm always upset about, that I'm building a story about, but have refused to talk to them about it? That is usually a people pleasing dynamic that's happening." - Amy Green Smith "Boundaries can be set with anger and rage...[but] they're not healthy boundaries." - Michelle Chalfant "If it's worth complaining about, then it's probably worth taking action on." - Amy Green Smith "Every time you choose to silence yourself...you send a subconscious message to your mind that your wants, opinions and needs just don't matter as much as someone else's." - Amy Green Smith "You can respect one another without agreeing." - Amy Green Smith "You don't have to agree. Just respect me." - Michelle Chalfant "You can have two completely different opinions about something and still be in relationship with that person." - Michelle Chalfant "It's hard for us to actually be with the goodness in our life." - Amy Green Smith "The receiving piece is huge." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES Amy Green Smith Website Amy Green Smith Instagram https://instagram.com/heyamygreensmith The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 350: "I Feel Like a Fraud!" Overcoming Imposter Syndrome | 19 Jan 2023 | 00:20:43 | |
You landed the dream gig, got the promotion, submitted your book for publishing, had an amazing first date. So, why do you feel so insecure, unsure and even unworthy? Imposter syndrome, or feeling like a fraud, is something that everyone struggles with from time to time — yep, even those super successful people you look up to. It's that feeling that you don't really deserve the recognition or opportunities you've earned or you worry you're not really good enough for them. It often sounds like, "If they only knew…" Imposter syndrome can pop up when something good happens in our life or it can hold us back from ever going after our dreams. In this episode, I'm breaking down exactly what imposter syndrome is, where it comes from and the concrete steps you can take to work through it and overcome it! Listen to discover:
Feeling like a fraud is part of the human experience. But because this feeling causes us shame, we hide it and then end up thinking we're the only ones. It's time we talk about it openly — and talk about what you can do so it doesn't hold you back any longer! I hope the steps in this episode are steps you can turn to anytime you feel imposter syndrome creep up. "If you feel this way, don't feel like you're the only one." - Michelle Chalfant "It's the feeling that you're a fraud, that you don't deserve compliments, praise or success that you rightfully earned." - Michelle Chalfant "When we have imposter syndrome, we feel like our success happened by chance or by luck." - Michelle Chalfant "It's like we're carrying around this big, dark secret that we want no one to know about." - Michelle Chalfant "It's critical to have self-worth. This is one of the ways that we work ourselves out of feeling like a fraud or an imposter." - Michelle Chalfant "When we can become witness to it, we give ourselves another perspective." - Michelle Chalfant "Don't let your rouge thoughts run your life." - Michelle Chalfant "When we change our thoughts into positive, conscious thoughts about who we are, it feels better." - Michelle Chalfant "What we're not great at doing is accepting and owning our accomplishments." - Michelle Chalfant "These are your accomplishments. They're yours. Claim them. Be proud of them." - Michelle Chalfant "Self-worth is key to changing your mindset about being a fraud." - Michelle Chalfant "Self-worth is all about value." - Michelle Chalfant "Imposter syndrome is much more common than you would think." - Michelle Chalfant LINKS & RESOURCES The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||
| 349: Breaking Down Astrology with Rachel Lang | 12 Jan 2023 | 00:41:42 | |
At the start of a new year, we all wonder what the year will hold for us. Even with the resolutions and intentions we set, there's also that element of uncertainty around the things we can't control. What will come our way? What will shift for us? This goes beyond just us as individuals. Our planet also goes through shifts and transitions with the rhythms of nature and the universe – and on this show, I'm talking with astrologer Rachel Lang to learn more about what might be coming for all of us here on earth in 2023 and beyond. Before giving her predictions for 2023, Rachel breaks down what astrology is and why it's so much more than what many people think. She helps demystify some of the thought processes and patterns behind it and explains some of the shifts that could be coming in the universe. And, to help illustrate just how complex and deep astrology charts can be, I'm putting myself out there and letting her read my chart on air. Curious to find out what might be going on in my life this year? Listen to find out! Listen to discover:
Astrology is much deeper than just your birthday or your horoscope in the newspaper. It's about the rhythms of nature and the patterns we see in the heavenly bodies – and what that can mean for trends in the universe and in each of our lives. Whether you love astrology or are a self-proclaimed skeptic, this episode will give you some interesting things to consider and some insights into what this year might hold for you. "Any time we open ourselves up, we have the opportunity to really help others." - Rachel Lang "It is the least woo woo of all the things that are considered woo." - Rachel Lang "It's a study of archetypes." - Rachel Lang "Everything has some kind of symbolic resonance." - Rachel Lang "You can use astrology for just about everything." - Michelle Chalfant "If we would work with the cycles of nature instead of against them, then I think personally we wouldn't have a lot of the problems that we have right now." - Rachel Lang "Everything affects everything else." - Rachel Lang "It's about space, but ultimately, it brings us to a place of presence on the earth." - Rachel Lang LINKS & RESOURCES Rachel Lang Website https://rachellangastrologer.com/ Episode #94: An Astrologer's View of New Year Transitions with Rachel Lang https://theadultchair.com/podcasts/94-an-astrologers-view-of-new-year-transitions-with-rachel-lang/ The Adult Chair® Private Facebook Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ MORE ADULT CHAIR The Adult Chair® Website The Adult Chair® Events https://theadultchair.com/events/ The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification https://theadultchair.com/certification STAY CONNECTED Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/themichellechalfant Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheMichelleChalfant/ The Adult Chair® Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/theadultchair/ | |||