As we announced last week, this is the last episode of Tell Me Something True. Today, Laura walks through why we made this decision (it’s all fine, nothing is wrong!) 

A thing worth celebrating is that, over 67 episodes, nearly a quarter of a million adventurous, curious people said YES and pressed play over 600,000 times. Holy cow…that’s A LOT!!!!! 

The numbers only matter because they’re the mirror of how much YOU - and thousands of folks like you - said yes to falling in love with the mystery of life again. With every episode we asked, “how can this help someone to have a better next week?” We’re so grateful that you have been interested in going on this adventure with us. All of the episodes will stay up and we hope you’ll share them and return to these shows as you’re looking for inspiration, comfort, new tools, and new ideas. 

And we hope you’ll lease keep in touch! 

If you have a passionate idea for a show, or a message that absolutely MUST be heard, give Mikel a holler here: https://www.liminahouse.com/

Laura’s site (https://www.lauramckowen.com/) and her IG are the best way to say hey (https://www.instagram.com/laura_mckowen/) and pre-orders for her new book, Push Off From Here are happening! (https://www.lauramckowen.com/books/push-off-from-here)

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/67-laura-mckowen-on-why-we-are-wrapping-tmst

Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/07kXA2JZj7QaprV563Wfvj

Here’s the transcript: https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/laura-on-why-were-wrapping-tmst-BVRgiJfS/transcript

TMST Members - We will take care of canceling the membership program and you will not see any new charges. It’s impossible to say how much we appreciate your support of the show. You made a difference and we are forever grateful.

Melissa Urban is one of the few people we’ve asked back to the show and there’s a reason for that. She’s got such a unique, magnetic energy and this strong, no-nonsense, yet compassionate way of showing up in the world. 

And now, she’s written The Book of Boundaries: Set the Limits That Will Set You Free and, can we get a hell yes? We need this in our lives.

Melissa walks us through why boundaries are one of the most important life skills one can have, common pitfalls, why she wrote a specific section for mother-in-laws, and so much more. Friends, we are not overstating it when we say it’s hands-down the best book on boundaries EVER.

Also, we have an announcement: we’ve decided to bring TMST to a close, and this episode will be our second to last. Laura will have a lot to say about what went into this decision next week, in her final solo episode. 

Melissa Urban’s site: https://www.melissau.com/

Melissa’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/melissau/

The Book of Boundaries: https://www.melissau.com/boundaries-book/

 

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/66-melissa-urban-on-how-boundaries-will-set-you-free 

Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5fhCRmsIQewGFB5b1Qz9fd

Here’s the transcript: 

https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/melissa-urban-on-how-boundaries-will-set-you-free/transcript

 

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Being human means sometimes we feel deeply alone. Cut off from other people. For most people, it passes quickly.

For others, especially those who also suffer from addiction, that feeling of isolation is persistent. It’s a low hum that follows a person everywhere. Part of the reason why some drink is to numb that feeling and turn down the voices that whisper why we’re alone.

Chris Marshall knows these feelings well and he’s here today to share how listening to those voices have almost killed him on several occasions. And how he’s developed a support network to make them less loud. Chris learned how powerful the experience of connection can be and it, literally, helped to save his life. It led him to create Sans Bar, a community connection space that specializes in serving extravagantly amazing, zero alcohol cocktails.

You may know Chris if you’re a member of The Luckiest Club, the sobriety support community Laura founded where he’s one of the meeting leaders.

BONUS: Chris and Laura recorded some material just for TMST Plus members. Become a TMST Plus member to hear some of his top tips and secrets for creating an inclusive space, his favorite drink for the hottest summer day and the TWO WORD genius answer to “Do you want a drink?” and “Why aren’t you drinking?”

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/57-chrismarshall-on-how-connection-can-save-your-life

Spotify playlist for this episode: 

Here’s the transcript: https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/chris-marshall-on-how-connection-can-save-your-life/transcript

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

====

TMST is hosted by Laura McKowen, the bestselling author of We Are The Luckiest and founder of The Luckiest Club. Follow the show and Laura on Instagram.

HANDS UP if knowing what you want, and standing up for it, has not always been welcome.

Imagine being hit with that - and you’re America’s top-selling female group of all time!

Marissa Moss has a lot to say about powerful women, making their own rules, and finding solidarity when the world is pitting them against each other. This TMST is a  conversation about how women are being true to themselves and reshaping culture, while building huge, diverse audiences. 

In the book, “Her Country: How the Women of Country Music Became the Success They Never Were Supposed to Be,” Moss weaves together The Chicks, Shania and Loretta, and the new generation like Maren Morris, Kacey Musgraves and Mickey Guyton.

The stories she shares in our conversation are gripping, and gut churning. And…. she’s going to explain to us the veiled threat that still exists today - you don’t want to get Chicked, do ya?

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/56-marissa-moss-on-not-getting-chicked

Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0hJwhPHQzuqT9OgiAnpAhQ

Here’s the transcript: https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/marissa-moss-on-not-getting-chicked/transcript

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

====

TMST is hosted by Laura McKowen, the bestselling author of We Are The Luckiest and founder of The Luckiest Club. Follow the show and Laura on Instagram.

When was the last time you got real about jealousy or envy?

In this episode, Laura brings the heat, digging into how jealousy and envy have shown up in her life. She explores the ways they’re different and the ways we use them to blow ourselves up.

This is no trail of tears, though! We’ll take a look at what social psychologists and researchers have identified as the purpose of these emotions. And then we explore ways to help work through these feelings when they rise up and want to take charge of our lives.

If you’re a TMST Plus member, the members-only episode features a bonus conversation Laura had with her friend Christie Tate, the NY Times Bestselling author of Group, which was about her experience in group therapy. The two of them have spent a lot of time delving into these gross, uncomfortable feelings, and you can be a fly on the wall as they explore it.

SUPPORT: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

====

TMST is hosted by Laura McKowen, the bestselling author of We Are The Luckiest and founder of The Luckiest Club. Follow the show and Laura on Instagram.

You can find the transcript for this episode here.

We are never more than one connection away from a veteran or first responder.

They are the ULTRA helping professions. During the pandemic, many were the first line of protection and care. Over 20 years of The Global War of Terror, many have experienced repeated deployments with an anodyne “thank you for your service” and a bad country music song as their only Thank You.

But how many of us have asked how we can be part of THEIR solution network?

Meet Dr. Kate Pate, a neurophysiologist who is looking at the ways our brains impact our bodies, and how we heal both in harmony. Kate is laser-focused on the health and healing needs of our veterans and first responders, which means she’s focused on matters that impact our entire society.

Her perspective is grounded in healing and is relevant to all of us because we’re connected to these folks or need similar healing. She gets the role recovery plays in the equation and she brings true illumination to things like, “what’s a trigger?” and “is this PTSD?”

Dr. Kate Pate is one of the most impressive and insightful people we’ve ever met and you are going to love her.

 

Dr Kate Pate’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/doc.pate/

Episode link:  https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/54-dr-kate-pate-vets-first-responders-being-triggered

Transcript: https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/dr-kate-pate-on-vets-first-responders-and-why-being-triggered-is-more-complicated-than-you-think/transcript

Spotify playlist for this episode:

 

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

====

TMST is hosted by Laura McKowen, the bestselling author of We Are The Luckiest and founder of The Luckiest Club. Follow the show and Laura on Instagram.

Rollercoasters are a fun diversion, but they’re no way to live. That’s why the whipsaw experience of being on an emotional rollercoaster is one of the things folks are most happy to see leave their life. Those radical highs and lows aren’t confined to the times when people are using - they often extend well into sobriety. Usually driven by hyper-sensitivity and, to be honest, a lot of self-absorption.

And that’s where today’s guest comes in…. As we mark the beginning of Year Two for Tell Me Something True, we’re revisiting a conversation with Veronica Valli on emotional sobriety.

We get into how emotional sobriety does and doesn’t relate to abstinence from substance or process addictions. What emotional sobriety actually means, why it’s something everyone has to do (not just people in recovery) if they want healthy relationships, because no matter what, “the hardest thing any human being has to do is deal with other people.”

In addition to being a dear friend, Veronica is a woman in long-term recovery, a therapist, a sobriety coach, founder of the Soberful program, a co-host of the Soberful podcast, and the author of three books, the most recent of which, Soberful: Uncover a Sustainable, Fulfilling Life Free of Alcohol.

Veronica has genuine encouragement to share about the comfort and relief that comes from living an integrated life. As happens every time we talk, after this conversation, we felt more grounded, clear, and hopeful, and hope this has the same effect for you, too.

• Veronica’s website
• The Soberful podcast

SUPPORT: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

====

TMST is hosted by Laura McKowen, the bestselling author of We Are The Luckiest and founder of The Luckiest Club. Follow the show and Laura on Instagram.

Brianna Madia’s journey as a vagabond lifestyle influencer was extraordinary. It was her, her van, her dogs and, for a time, her husband. And according to her it was really good. Until it wasn’t. And then, it got really scary. Brianna takes us behind the curtain of the IG influencer life - and then we go 100 levels deeper. While the world was fixed on her very attractive-appearing life, she was living with a slow, gnawing truth that was killing her. When she came clean, the geyser of vitriol was horrific. The extreme shaming she received after admitting that she made some, admittedly, desperate life choices - was topped only by the brutality she inflicted on herself. A brutality that had her considering some irrevocable actions. Brianna is able to talk about some big truths and hard things - and yet it never feels like trauma porn. There’s no voyeuristic charge to her story, so you’re left being able to see where we’ve all made choices we wouldn’t want to repeat - and where we go from there. Brianna’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/briannamadia/ Brianna’s site: https://www.briannamadia.com/ Her book, Nowhere For Very Long: https://www.briannamadia.com/nowhereforverylong Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/52-brianna-madia-on-surviving-the-lie-that-was-killing-her Spotify playlist for this episode: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

An insatiable need for romantic attention and love. Periods of overeating or starving. Using alcohol, food, or over-working to numb out. A pattern of unstable and painful relationships. Does this sound painfully familiar? Kelly McDaniel is a trauma therapist who saw these traits over and over in clients who felt trapped in cycles of harmful behaviors and were unable to stop. In 2008, she coined the term Mother Hunger as a way to describe this pattern and has since helped countless women. In this conversation, Kelly and Laura talk about: – What Mother Hunger is – How Mother Hunger shows up in our relationship to food – The three critical elements of mothering and what happens when those needs aren’t met – What Mother Hunger looks like in other relationships, like friendships and at work – The link between food and unstable relationship patterns – The concept of “frozen grief” – The double-bind women face when it comes to sexual expression – How to begin to heal Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/51-kelly-mcdaniel-on-mother-hunger Show notes: Ready to Heal book Mother Hunger book Kelly’s website: https://kellymcdanieltherapy.com/ Kelly’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kellymcdanieltherapy/ Spotify playlist for this episode: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free. ==== TMST is hosted by Laura McKowen, the bestselling author of We Are The Luckiest and founder of The Luckiest Club. Follow the show and Laura on Instagram.

What could be heavier than the secrets we carry? The constant vigilance and concealment can be exhausting. But can you tell the difference between what’s a secret and what’s being kept private? Michael Slepian does and he can back it up with research. Slepian studies the psychology of secrets and, as he’s discovered, the real problem with keeping a secret is not that you have to hide it, but that you have to live with it, and think about it. But here’s the trick - we confuse secrets, lies and privacy all the time! And we hurt ourselves in the process. Slepian helps us figure out where we’re hurting ourselves -and where we can give ourselves a break, drop the guilt and free up some mental space! Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/50-michael-slepian-knowing-difference-between-secrets-lies-privacy Spotify playlist for this episode: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Every day, every hour, every minute, there’s a request. More time. More attention. More engagement. More space in our brains and our lives. Laura feels the pinch like everyone and she frequently fields questions on how she allocates her time, attention and life passion. In this solo episode, Laura shares how she found inspiration in the way the comic Whitney Cummings thinks about it - ENERGY DOLLARS. We aren’t infinite people (no matter what society and our conditioning tells us.) For all the things that energize us and fill our tank, we also have to come to terms with how much each demand, activity, and engagement asks us to spend our energy dollars. Laura brings her experiences as a mom with an increasingly independent kid, who is facing a new summer rhythm. A creative person who has to feed that glorious beast. And as… a human, who values her sobriety relationships and sense of peace and is making choices every day, every hour, every minute, just like you, to make it work as well as she can. Whitney Cummings on Energy Dollars: https://www.instagram.com/tv/CdvxYFuFbZY/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/49-laura-mckowen-protecting-your-energy-using-energy-dollars Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6jmNE9jae75RGE48ClC6tb?si=676137eadeac4017 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Everyone has a day, or week, go sideways. What happens when life hits the blender - and it goes on for years? Shauna Niequist has a lot to offer because she’s lived it. Her latest book, I Guess I Haven’t Learned That Yet, covers a time in her life when Every. Single. Thing. was, as she says, tossed in the blender. Family. Vocation. Faith. Sense of belonging. And then, also… menopause. Shanua has the rare gift of being able to inspire while never getting saccharine, to be honest without overexposing, to impart wisdom without being preachy. She came ready to talk and even if you feel like you know her through her previous books, Cold Tangerines, Bittersweet, Bread & Wine, Savor, and Present Over Perfect, we promise you - you are going to discover a whole new side to the amazing Shauna Niequist Shauna’s site: https://www.shaunaniequist.com/ Shauna’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/sniequist/ Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/48-shauna-niequist-thriving-after-life-goes-in-the-blender Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6uFlQPrp0NvBiJkmw6DpXl Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Tell the truth - how many times does the phrase “I’m so burned out?” show up around you?

Burnout is both more than we think it is, and much more insidious. Burnout has been defined by the World Health Organization as a workplace-centered phenomenon, and they calculate that it’s killing +750,000 people a year!

Jennifer Moss has dedicated a large part of her career to researching, writing about, and educating people on burnout. She is going to get us on the same page so we can understand EXASCTLY what it is, how it’s measured, and its real-world impacts. 

Jennifer is a journalist, former start-up founder, and brilliant thinker on how our workplaces and our society is failing us. Her book, The Burnout Epidemic, is an excellent deep dive into the topic and, like so many of us, she came to this topic through her own experience of burning out.

Jennifer Moss’ site: https://www.jennifer-moss.com/

The Burnout Epidemic: https://www.jennifer-moss.com/books

If you care about these kinds of conversations, we hope you’ll become a TMST Plus member.  

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/65-jennifer-moss-on-the-burnout-epidemic

Spotify playlist for this episode: 

Here’s the transcript: 

https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/jennifer-moss-on-the-burnout-epidemic/transcript

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

Support TMST and keep it ad-free: 

https://tmst.supercast.com/

Let’s be real. The words “Love Addiction” can trigger a massive eye roll. Jodi White gets it and she’s here to show us that it’s real and a lot more common than we think. Jodi draws on the groundbreaking work of Pia Mellody and builds on it in a way that is comforting, clarifying and hopeful. Jodi is open about the ways SHE’s struggled in this area and we talk about what it’s like to be love anorexic (yes, that’s a thing). We dig into Mother Hunger and some of the other behaviors that prime us for love addiction. Wondering if this is for you? The three primary symptoms of love addiction are: assigning too much time and value to another person, neglecting ourselves while in relationships, and expecting unconditional positive regarding from partners. This is one of those you may need to listen to a few times. There’s a lot in it and it’s packed with goodness from Jodi. Don’t forget…there’s a Spotify playlist that accompanies this episode and if you haven’t become a paid subscriber, we hope you’ll do that. The support of all of you who get something out of these conversations keeps them going. It matters. Jodi’s site: https://www.jodiwhitelpc.com/ Jodi’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/jodiwhite_/ Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/47-jodi-white-love-addiction-mother-hunger-codependency Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3extzRzZ2Xvy5rAq9aZAvt Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

When Ana Marie Cox said, “I can’t wring self-worth out of the universe,” we felt that hit like a mountain. Ana spent the better part of two decades as a political columnist and culture critic. She started the political blog Wonkette in 2004, and worked at outlets like The New York Times, Time magazine, GQ, Air America, and The Guardian. After living behind a professional persona for a long time, Ana started to talk about more personal parts of her life publicly, like being bi-polar and struggling with alcohol addiction. She moved away from politics and we talk about why, as well as what getting sober was like for her, but not just from alcohol. We talk about breaking the addiction to productivity, busy-ness, approval, and co-dependency. Ana has some VERY poignant things to share about mother / daughter relationships, forgiveness, and real recovery. As you’ll hear, Ana is willing to get very real and we get an inside view into her Sober Questioning column in The Cut, where she answers readers’ questions about drinking — and not drinking — every other week. Sober Questioning: https://www.thecut.com/tags/sober-questioning/ Ana’s site: https://www.anamariecox.com/ Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/46-ana-marie-cox-trusting-the-process Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6XvGaYQMoLmVZLmsUGOhh2 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Wes Hurt is the founder of Sparkling Yerba Mate CLEAN Cause, a beverage company donating 50% of its net profits to funding sober living scholarships; Jason Isbell is a Grammy Award-Winning singer/songwriter; and Jan Rader, Director of the Mayor’s Council on Public Health & Drug Control Policy for Huntington, WV, who was also named to TIME Magazine’s 2018 Top 100 Most Influential List, star of the Emmy Award winning film Heroin(e), first female fire chief, and lead witness in the Landmark Opioid Trial.

Jason Isbell's Instagram

Wes Hurt's Instagram

Jan Rader's Instagram 

Official site for Heroin(e) documentary featuring Jan Rader.

TMST Show website.

Spotify playlist for this episode.

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community.

Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura, and help keep TMST ad-free. 

Follow the show and Laura McKowen on Instagram.

Laura mines more gold from the TMST community this week with a MUCH requested topic: Imposter Syndrome. Hands up - who doesn’t face some version of this, and would we want to hang with someone who doesn’t??? In this episode, Laura leaves us with three key ideas to help us deal with Imposter Syndrome and we close the show with a note for people who are looking for more recovery support. Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What do you do when a friend tells you he’s just gone through his worst year? Well, when he’s a brave and bright light in the world, and he’s Mishka Shubaly, you invite him on the podcast! Seriously, Mishka Shubaly is a brilliant writer, a profound soul and the owner of one of the darkest senses of humor EVER. As he says early in our conversation, “I'm here to bring you the inspirational message that there's always a fresh hell available to you.” And…somehow, it’s a laugh line! Alternating between raw, courageous vulnerability and pungent insight, this conversation with Mishka reminds us that getting clean, looking inward, and being committed to the well being of others doesn’t make you exempt from the pain - but it does give you a place to stand when the world goes upside down. Mishka’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/mishkashubaly/ Mishka’s linktree: https://linktr.ee/mishkashubaly Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4r1RHnqkMeTri5FbZVTXwB Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/43-mishka-shubaly-on-getting-through-your-worst-year Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Peter Rollins is back! Our first return guest to TMST, we asked Peter back to talk about how we contend with uncertainty (e.g. life). If you don’t know Peter, he’s an Irish theologian, philosopher, author, and speaker who got an international reputation for turning traditional ideas of religion on their head. As is typical with Peter, the conversation went down many useful tangents. We started by talking about the role of liturgical structures in our lives, what they mean and why we need them (they’ve got nothing to do with religion, by the way) and then wove our way into talking about anxiety, trauma, and so much more. Peter is one of those people who makes us feel hopeful, inspired, and challenged by life at the same time. He’s a joy to talk with and listen to and we’re so happy to have him back on the show. Peter’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/peter_rollins Peter’s website: https://peterrollins.com/ Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/42-peter-rollins-on-grappling-with-uncertainty Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3SmmkLmuNLi0FGSay6Mt5r?si=d2a3a4e44ce44723 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

When the world is screaming “It’s all black or white,” how do we remember that we mostly live in the grey area? Brenda Davies might be onto something. She’s the author of “On Her Knees: Memoir of a Prayerful Jezebel,” which chronicles the pendulum swing experienced as she left Christian purity culture and then embraced LA’s hook-up culture. She’s also the creator of In The Grey a Youtube channel and podcast that “champions curiosity, sex positivity, compassion & healthy debate.” Whether it’s with religion, or sex, or our relationships, Brenda is encouraging us to open up our thinking. We get into the ways we disconnect from our bodies during sex - and disconnect from our intuition when people want us to adopt an ideology that may not serve us. This is a fast, fun conversation and we’re excited for you to meet Brenda. Show notes: Brenda’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/godisgrey/ Brenda’s YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/GodisGrey Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/41-brenda-davies-purity-hook-ups-and-life-in-the-grey Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7FOeISM1Ots0yBnQc1Dg3p Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if there’s more to our collective struggle to FOCUS than we’ve considered? And what do we have to do to regain what we’ve lost? Those are the questions Johann Hari is exploring in his new book, “Stolen Focus: Why You Can’t Pay Attention - and How To Think Deeply Again.” It’s a surprising look at how our struggle with attention isn’t just about tech. In this conversation, Johann brings the same inquisitive, roving gaze that led him to observe, “the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety - it’s connection.” When he dropped that nugget in his legendary TED Talk (link in the notes below,) he articulated something that we didn’t know we had been searching for. While the statement isn’t totally accurate - most of us know addiction is more complicated than one thing – it still illuminated something fundamental about the misunderstanding our society has had about addiction forever. Johann’s view on our individual power to address the collective fog that has enveloped us around the pandemic is empowering and worth our time. Show notes: Johann Hari: https://johannhari.com/ Johann’s TED Talk: Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/40-johann-hari-regaining-our-ability-to-focus Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4h6931YcA4D0Ax080zerkL Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

“Nothing is personal” is easy to say, but our adult friendships can truly test our ability to hold on to that vital lesson from Don MIguel Ruiz. In this AMA Laura takes on two different questions from listeners about how we navigate adult friendships. How do things change when one friend gets sober? How do we navigate the reality that we can grow apart as friends, just as we can in a romantic relationship? How do our patterns in friendships mirror our patterns in family dynamics and in our love life? What do we even WANT from our adult relationships? We don’t talk about this enough and we were so glad when we saw these questions come in. As usual, the TMST community brings the good stuff and we love making this show with you! Show notes: Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/39-laura-mckowen-ask-me-anything Spotify playlist for this episode: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if one of the most powerful things we can say is, “I don’t know?” Sharon McMahon came to our attention through her hugely popular @sharonsaysso Instragram account. Sharon’s ability to share clear, relevant and non-partisan facts about the US government and democracy with her followers has built one of the few sane, healthy communities on the internet. More than anything, Sharon is SUCH a clear thinker on why we need to have more places in our lives to say those three magical words: “I don’t know.” And to give ourselves permission to say, “I need to think about that. Let me get back to you.” Or to even give ourselves permission to say - or post - nothing at all. Laura and Sharon sat down Tuesday afternoon and we’re getting the conversation in your hands at top speed. We know there’s a real hunger for reliable information in the world, so we wanted you to meet her (if you hadn’t discovered her already) and take advantage of what she’s doing. It’s an unedited, fast-moving, fun conversation. Show notes: Sharon McMahon: https://www.sharonmcmahon.com/ Sharon’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/sharonsaysso/ Episode link: https://tmstpod.com/episodes/38-sharon-mcmahon-the-power-of-saying-i-dont-know Spotify playlist for this episode:https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3BG8Wt5ROREYtUpNfY3ESv?si=PWHyWgXTSdio7YC4FRKioA&nd=1 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Ali Shapiro arrives with a mountain of good news!

We don't have to evade our relationship with food.  We don't have to be ruled by stories that shame us and keep us stuck. Most importantly, those stories don't have to contribute to hating ourselves.

Ali is the creator of the Truce with Food Program, which combines how we think - and feel about - food and the stories we tell ourselves. She’s bridging psychology and behavioral change so we can break all the absurd, dangerous and shaming ways we approach food and our bodies. 

Ali’s a holistic nutritionist, integrated health coach and a total straight-shooter who’s not afraid to call BS on the insanity of diet culture. Her approach is truly a breath of fresh air; she’s one of the only people we'd have this kind of conversation with.

Ali’s site: https://alishapiro.com/courses/truce-with-food/

If you care about these kinds of conversations, we hope you’ll become a TMST Plus member.  

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/64-ali-shapiro-healing-our-relationship-to-food-weight-and-body-image

Spotify playlist for this episode: 

Here’s the transcript: https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/ali-shapiro-on-healing-our-relationship-to-food-weight-and-body-image/transcript 

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

Support TMST and keep it ad-free: 

https://tmst.supercast.com/

This week, we’re revisiting one of our most discussed and asked-for topics: BURNOUT. Caroline Dooner’s first book, The F*ck It Diet: Eating Should Be Easy is a massively popular and influential book for good reason. It’s that helped so many of us reframe diet culture and to finally drop the 10,000 lb gorilla that is our obsession with food. After several years of feeling the effects of her work, and the way she approached her life and success, Caroline is back with a second book - Tired as F*ck: Burnout at the Hands of Diet, Self-Help, and Hustle Culture This is the conversation we NEED and Caroline is the perfect person to get us going. She doesn’t sit on high and issue pronouncements about how we’re supposed to live. Her work is very personal and, as she says, she uses her stories as a cautionary tale. Show notes: Caroline Dooner: https://carolinedooner.com/ Caoline’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/thefuckitdiet/ The Fuck It Diet: https://thefuckitdiet.com/ Episode link: Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2MMf9BdRlYSWoXc1T2s0Eg?si=6a479752967e4994 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

How many of us have the courage to face the friction that comes when we need to grow, but people want us to stay the same? You’ve built an audience as a “truth-teller,” but then what if your understanding of the truth changes? When you’re an author, artist and performer like Jill Louise Busby, creative growth is essential, but the community that first delivered your moment of “micro-fame” might not be on board. It’s a life challenge we all face, even if we don’t all do it publicly. Laura gets into all that and a whole lot more in her darkly funny and thoroughly revealing conversation with Jill. Then, we REALLY want you to check out Jill’s debut book, Unfollow Me: Essays on Complicity. It’s an intimate, impertinent, and incisive collection about race, progress, and hypocrisy, and was released in September, 2021 by Bloomsbury Publishing. Show notes: Jill Louise Busby: https://jilllouisebusby.com/ Jill’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/jilllouisebusby/ Jill’s book: https://amzn.to/352QlUX Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/36-jill-louise-busby-on-being-unfollowed Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7KI7qvvyINKOjyOqcjtszZ Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

The TMST community takes center stage again as Laura tackles some universal questions on facing down shame and regret. In this episode, we explore the ways our mistakes, our successes, our disappointments and our growth can’t be compartmentalized if we’re going to be free. It’s a VERY hopeful and energizing AMA. We’re continually blown away by the candor and courage TMST listeners bring to this space. And THEN…we have a major show announcement to share, plus a taste of next week’s guest - the brilliant and witty Jill Louise Busby. Show notes: TMST LIVE at SXSW site: https://schedule.sxsw.com/2022/events/PP1140837 Jill Louise Busby: https://jilllouisebusby.com/ Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/35-laura-mckowen-ask-me-anything Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6n0cP0PuSjGh0IW5tF9VOk?si=47f8ccf2da064067 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

This week, we asked a big question... what can Timothée Chalamet’s character in “Don’t Look Up” teach us about finding faith in tough times? No, seriously… we dig into it in a real way and Nadia Bolz-Weber is exactly the person to explore what we can take away from what she admits is a “deeply cynical movie.” Nadia is an ordained Lutheran pastor, the New York Times best selling author of three memoirs including Pastrix and Accidental Saints; Finding God In All The Wrong People, and a woman in long-term recovery. She’s an example of the ways faith can exist without dogma, exclusion, or shaming. She speaks candidly and generously as a woman with decades of sobriety and a life spent as the person who “always sits in the corner with the other weirdoes.” In this conversation, Nadia urges us to take a breath and step forward into life with courage, an open heart of acceptance, a hell of a lot of humility, and especially, a sense of humor. Show notes: Nadia’s site: https://nadiabolzweber.com/ Episode link: https://tmstpod.com/episodes/34-nadia-bolz-weber-how-we-are-really-doing Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3dhzKN3INZTtRg6TQkPuSr?si=a0a9ae43b3674c23 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Janet was right. It’s all about CONTROL. Amanda White has some wise, and life-earned, things to say about the illusion of control. If we’re honest, our desire for control is inseparable from all of our motivations, and can lead us to extreme places. Amanda is a therapist, a woman in recovery from both disordered eating and alcohol, and she’s the author of NOT DRINKING TONIGHT, a terrific book that is a huge contribution in the sobriety space because it bridges the gap between memoir and clinical programming. Amanda breaks down important and often misunderstood topics like self-care, boundaries, reparenting, and trauma, as well as diving deep into WHY we drink. Whether or not alcohol is a thing for you is pretty much irrelevant to this conversation, because almost anyone can relate to issues of control: over our surroundings, other people, and especially our feelings. Show notes: Not Drinking Tonight: https://amandaewhite.com/book Episode link: https://tmstpod.com/episodes/33-amanda-white-our-desire-for-control Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1VgaPAppho7DouFQd8CcEz Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

How would you approach change if you saw it as BOTH a practice AND mindset? Katy Milkman has researched this and it’s clear she’s on to something. In today’s conversation and in her bestselling book, How to Change: The Science of Getting from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be, Katy Milkman shows us how change is BOTH a combination of acquiring practical skills AND a rewiring our brains through new behaviors. Katy Milkman is a Professor at The Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania and ALSO holds an appointment at Penn’s Perelman School of Medicine. Her research uses psychology and economics to explore how we can change for the good. Katy has an accessible, practical demeanor and she’s able to distill complex bodies of research into easy to digest insights and she’s refreshingly honest about her own struggles with change. This episode is full of practical tools and helpful insights, and she also talks about how she’s learned to be more confident and assertive in the male-dominated world of higher education, and science. She’s also one of those people you meet in life and talking with them is this lovely ride. And when you’re done you realize - HEY…I just learned A TON and that was really fun, too! Show notes: How To Change: The Science of Getting From Where You Are to Where You Want To Be: https://www.katymilkman.com/book Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2kjrnKaHpWmwmPJra47fjW?si=dae22796abb64144 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

We promised more AMAs, so let’s go! This week, Laura answers three questions that interlace around the topics of infidelity, trust, intimacy, divorce, addiction, forgiveness, and the complex reality of life and love. We are so grateful for the courage and trust our listeners place in us when they call in and share themselves in such generous ways. Trust us, their words and their voices will stick with you and add to your day. Submit a question for a future episode: https://www.tmstpod.com/question Show notes: The State of Affairs by Esther Perel: https://amzn.to/3AdvTvK Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7yWLC9O1WCpXdaqYArvedI?si=e740532b6dd64878 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Purity culture isn’t a thing that happens to OTHER people. The tendrils of sexual repression have insinuated themselves into all of our lives. In the second half of our conversation with Jamie Lee Finch, we see how evangelical Christianity’s restrictive approach to sex, sex education and owning your body and desire isn’t that different from what so many of us experienced. It’s a shocking and bracing discovery that has profound implications for our lives. This conversation is funny and weird and dark. We get into why so many pastors can’t stop talking about their “smoking hot wife” and how missionary work might be completely inseparable from sexual sublimation. Jamie Lee Finch is the author of You Are Your Own: A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity. Make sure you check out the first half of our conversation from last week! Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2LdiPlkf5XqJiNPr8yKqD2?si=a7a9878a8eb845a4 Episode link: Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if your body was your closest friend instead of…whatever it is now? Jamie Lee Finch is a wise guide for so many women who are asking - what would a healthy relationship with my body look like? In this conversation we go deep into why we need to relate to our bodies like A PERSON and the healing that can come as a result. Virtually NONE of us are free of body issues, whether they’re around our shape, or desire, or how we change with aging. Jamie’s unwavering stance for our health, wholeness and living an integrated life is the message we need to hear right now. Jamie is also the author of You Are Your Own: A Reckoning with the Religious Trauma of Evangelical Christianity. Next week, in the second half of our conversation, we’ll explore what it’s been like to deal with the lasting effects of having been raised in purity culture and so much more. Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2LdiPlkf5XqJiNPr8yKqD2?si=a7a9878a8eb845a4 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Our final episode for 2021 is a harvest of hard-earned wisdom to launch us into 2022. You’ll hear from Peter Rollins, Annie Grace, Rob Bell, yung pueblo, and africa brooke. They share so much on how to slow down, trust ourselves, get our focus on what we truly need and, most of all, have fun while doing it! We are SO GRATEFUL for all of the support and encouragement that has come our way in these first six months since we launched TMST. We can’t wait to get at in the New Year! Super deluxe +2 hour Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2QDWiNjDf9i5DDWZ3Smk9t Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

On TMST we’ve been open about our conflicted relationship with technology and social media. And you’ve heard many of our guests recount their mixed feelings, as well.

Today’s guest takes all of that and turns it up to 11.

In 2018, Larissa May (who goes by Larz) spoke out about her struggle with depression on social media. The post and hashtag that emerged around it was called #HalfTheStory - and it sparked a global conversation about the relationship between technology and emotional wellbeing. 

Having just turned 28, Larz holds a unique place in our culture. She’s a part of society that has had their adulthood defined by social media AND, she’s also just about as old as you can be and still be able to talk to Gen Z as something like a peer. She’s doing that through workshops, and creating screenless experiences, and nature immersions. 

Today, Larissa is asking us to consider what we get out of being the guinea pigs in Mark Zuckerberg’s experiments in the metaverse. 

Or getting us to become aware of how prevalent the drug trade is on the social platforms - and how they’re not doing a whole lot to crack down. 

She’s is exactly the kind of person who we love to welcome to Tell Me Something True and we’re excited for you to meet her today.

Larissa’s site:  https://www.livinlikelarz.com/

Larissa’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/livinlikelarz/

#HalfThe Story: https://www.instagram.com/halfthestory/

If you care about these kinds of conversations, we hope you’ll become a TMST Plus member.  

Episode link: https://www.tmstpod.com/episodes/63-larissa-may-and-our-journey-to-digital-wellness

Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1T8Wqk3beLx3f8BTaIAtXx

Here’s the transcript: https://tell-me-something-true.simplecast.com/episodes/larissa-may-and-our-journey-to-digital-wellness/transcript

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

Support TMST and keep it ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if you could step off the rollercoaster of emotional highs and lows? What if the pain that comes with taking everything personally could taper and largely disappear? THAT’S the promise of emotional sobriety, and Veronica Valli is one of the most steady, sane, helpful voices when it comes to that murky topic. Veronica is a woman in long-term recovery, a therapist, a sobriety coach, founder of the Soberful program, a co-host of the Soberful podcast, and the author of three books, the most recent of which, Soberful: Uncover a Sustainable, Fulfilling Life Free of Alcohol, will be published on January 25. On this episode of TMST, we get into how emotional sobriety does, and doesn’t, relate to abstinence from substance or process addictions. What emotional sobriety actually means, why it’s something everyone (not just people in recovery) has to do if they want healthy relationships, because no matter what, “the hardest thing any human being has to do is deal with other people.” Veronica’s site: https://www.veronicavalli.com/ The Soberful podcast: https://soberful.com/ Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2loOl3NNSDWcCu4P2eiYJL?si=8037f210931b423d&nd=1 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

John Richards is the morning drive host at KEXP, Seattle. For decades, he’s been the soundtrack to the lives of people starting their day, handpicking every record and building a global fanbase. The thing to understand about John is that he’s on a mission than transcends playing cool tunes. John and KEXP are using their collective platform to carry the message that we’re not alone. That we are loved. That there’s a reason to get up every day. He is charming and funny, even when sharing about his battles with anxiety and depression. I think he’s a powerful role model for how our struggles don’t define us - and that we can put the hard times to good use. John’s site: https://djjohnrichards.com/ The Dr. & the DJ podcast: https://thedrandthedj.com/ Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2KC79Kr9eZ24TVXrwnBL7E Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What would life be like if we could identify ALL the emotions happening in and around us and have empathy for it all? Sharon Adams has a few ideas on how we can get there. Sharon’s a master trainer and facilitator in workshops around emotional intelligence and conflict resolution. She’s also someone who has profound insight into the lived reality of unconscious bias and inclusion and the stories she shares are super relatable. This episode of TMST is for everyone who has worked or lived with someone who isn't present to their emotions - or have struggled themselves. Deep down, we know that developing our emotional intelligence HAS to be at the center of everything we do. It’s foundational to our success as human beings. As Sharon makes clear, emotional intelligence is the Swiss army knife of relationships. And understanding how to use all the tools in it is a key to enjoying a peaceful life. Workplace Climate (Sharon’s firm:) https://workplaceclimate.org/ Sharon’s training programs: https://workplaceclimate.org/training-descriptions Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1w4SWXCviVjpahK1Bz1DR1 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if life wasn’t an endless series of zero-sum, high stakes experiences? Leonard Perlmutter is asking these and many other questions, and he's doing it in a lovely, humble way. He’s a meditation teacher, an author, and has a unique ability to make complicated things clear. He founded the American Meditation Institute in Albany, New York in 1996, and in the years since they've touched tens of thousands of lives through their classes and meditation, yoga and integrated health. Don’t be fooled by his easy-going, humble manner - Leonard drops solid gold every few minutes. This is an episode that you’ll go back to several times to wring out all of the goodness. Why Meditate?: https://americanmeditation.org/why-meditate/ The American Meditation Institute: https://americanmeditation.org/ AMI’s Foundation Meditation Course: https://americanmeditation.org/ami-meditation-course/ Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3lOKGXLAL42y5rnEI606zF Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

Laura offers two poems today: one of her favorites, one of her own. Happy Thanksgiving to those of you who are celebrating. And to all, a big heap of gratitude and mystery from all of us at Tell Me Something True. The Sleepless ones by Lawrence Tirnauer https://drkarinlawson.com/the-sleepless-ones/ You could be soft instead by Laura McKowen https://www.lauramckowen.com/blog/2019-3-11-you-could-be-soft Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

This week, we turned it over to you! In the first Ask Me Anything (AMA) episode, Laura answers four questions from our listener community. She talks about why she does this show, whether or not she’d ever do another sobriety-specific show, how to choose creative projects, the truths and fallacies of the whole “you must love yourself before you can be loved by others” saying, talking about new sobriety and the importance of choosing who you tell, and making friends as an adult, especially a sober one! This was really fun and we’ll do it again. Ira Glass on creativity: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbC4gqZGPSY 650 Prompts for Narrative and Personal Writing: https://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/20/learning/lesson-plans/650-prompts-for-narrative-and-personal-writing.html Submit a question for future episodes by becoming a member: https://tmstpod.circle.so/c/submit-qs-for-laura/submit-a-question-to-be-answered-live-on-the-show Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2bhVj8EF02STFdwCLBHpGO?si=3xkOkJrHQ2CcPsgzYhKiuQ Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What would you do if someone said you could “find comfort for the most vexing questions in our digitized lives in the wisdom of 19th c. European philosophers”? Sara Kuburic has taken up that challenge. Through her online persona as The Millennial Therapist and in private practice, Sara’s training as an existential psychotherapist integrates modern mental health knowledge with some of the most complex Western thought. Sara’s work provides a thrillingly lucid, concise and grounding response to The Big Questions. Bonus… she’s funny, engaging, and our time together flew by! You can find Sara here: https://www.sara-kuburic.com/ The Millennial Therapist IG account (a must-follow:) https://www.instagram.com/millennial.therapist/ Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4KkM9nu9EV2Jhe9SHbcusX?si=a9550c0642444b87&nd=1 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if the hard thing you didn’t want to share was also the thing that made you most human and brought people closer? Anna Sale knows A LOT about this. Anna is the creator of Death, Sex & Money, a podcast about “the things we think about a lot and need to talk about more.” She is also the author of Let’s Talk About Hard Things, which is an invitation to discuss the tough topics that all of us encounter. The New Yorker said it’s “like a good conversation with a friend” and we agree! Anna has this calm, resolute quality that zeroes in on what matters and then the patience to let some magical moments rise to the surface. In this episode, Anna and Laura talk about working through issues around money, how we see ourselves after divorce, and the power of going first. If you haven’t already, please make sure you check out Death, Sex & Money and enjoy! You can find Anna here: https://www.annasale.com/ Get your Death, Sex & Money here: https://www.wnycstudios.org/podcasts/deathsexmoney Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/09ooYTs6KWhpuZpbsQZeYL Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

When was the last time an artist took you by the hand and said, “Here, let me show you how the world looks through my eyes”? Frank X. Walker is Kentucky’s former poet laureate and one of the co-founders of the Affrilachian Poets - a grassroots group of poets of color living in the Appalachian region. Thirty years after their founding, the Affrilachian Poets continue to dismantle the idea that Appalachia is a white region, devoid of literature and the arts. For decades, Frank’s work has embodied a deeply personal approach and challenged us to see poetry as an urgent voice that can touch on our experience of living in a way other written works can’t. Today, Frank is the Director of the MFA program of the University of Kentucky and he’s mentored hundreds of artists along their path. He’s the author and editor of a dozen books of poetry and, as you’ll hear, Frank is a lovely, thoughtful, and really cool guy. You can find Frank here: http://frankxwalker.com/index.html Check out his books here: http://frankxwalker.com/books.html Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0djkPzw8PWwpv9qaixNZkX Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What if social media scrolling was the latest version of the mythical Labyrinth? An elaborate, confusing structure intended to keep the Minotaur (you) from escaping. Jane Clapp is a Toronto-based Jungian Somatics teacher who left social media because she knew it was making her sick. Her answer to the question “WHY is it making me sick?” tapped the deep wisdom of concepts like archetypes, complexes, and the collective unconscious. That twitchy anxiety we feel from all the FOMO and YOLO isn’t an accident. It’s proof that technologists and advertisers are succeeding in tapping our deepest desires to keep us trapped in the labyrinthine scroll. This one went to places we weren’t expecting and we can’t wait to hear what you think! You can find Jane here: https://www.janeclapp.com/ Jane has a pre-recorded webinar “Social Media: Your Body and Your Psyche:” https://www.janeclapp.com/products/socialmedia Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0Dzi40SHcEcFobVrw3ZPBe Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

We don’t like to admit it, but there are a hell of a lot of scripts that run us. They’re the “shoulds” - ideas so woven into our lives that we don’t even know they exist.

For virtually all women - the scripts around motherhood are the most pernicious. They load us down with self-doubt, bake in unattainable expectations, and set us up for a life where we’re always defined in relationship to others, our kids, or lack of kids.

Erin Lane has spent most of her life challenging these scripts. Her latest book, “Someone Other Than a Mother” tears up the shaming social scripts that are bad for moms and non-moms alike. When we hear things like “Motherhood is the toughest job…” or  "You don't know love until you become a mother" we’re encountering the social scripting that defines what’s “normal” for the majority of American women.

This conversation with Erin is equal parts liberating and bracing. She’s cracking something that we need to discuss in specific, urgent ways and we’re thrilled to have her as our guest on Tell Me Something True.

Resources:

Erin’s site:  https://www.erinslane.com/

Her book - Someone Other Than a Mother

If you care about these kinds of conversations, we hope you’ll become a TMST Plus member.  

Episode link: 

Spotify playlist for this episode: 

Here’s the transcript: 

Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Become a TMST member today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free.

Support TMST and keep it ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

erin s. lane, mother hunger, adoption, motherhood, parenting, codependency, christianity, biblical womanhood, someone other than a mother, laura mckowen, we are the luckiest

How would your life look if you arranged it so you could do what you love? Rob Bell has one of the most pure, electric, inspiring and infectious energies for life. He’s truly engaged in the mystery and is such a model for doing things your own way. A former megachurch pastor, who is the New York Times bestselling author of “Love Wins” and ten other books has been encouraging us to engage in the joy of life for many years. In a time of “influencers,” cheap fixes, social media narcissism, hustle culture, self-improvement by meme, and increasingly shallow teachers, he’s a rare example of someone who walks the talk. He’s far more interested in remaining curious than appearing to have all the answers and we love that about him. Rob Bell: https://robbell.com/ Rob’s Everything Is Spiritual Tour: https://robbell.com/event/all-new-everything-is-spiritual-tour/ Rob Bell: An Introduction to Joy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sA7LmEn3xyc Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/63nPvfLdS50UjcXlc3N2jZ Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

This week, Laura takes the mic solo to reflect on hitting seven years of sobriety. She goes deep on four ideas that feel most important now as she looks back - ideas that are both urgent and grounding, timely and timeless - whether you’ve struggled with addiction or not. Since Laura got sober in 2014, cultural ideas and discussions around sobriety and addiction have massively changed. A “condition” once cloaked in anonymity and dark church basements has become both vocal and visible as more and more people choose to recover out loud, new recovery modalities surface, and movements like #sobercurious #oneyearnobeer #soberoctober and #dryjanuary have brought alcohol-free experiments and lifestyles into the mainstream, Amidst this shift, Laura encourages us to play the long game. She touches on the many layers of her sobriety from quitting Ambien to body issues, money, emotional sobriety, relationships with men, and finally quitting social media, and how the work of recovery is an ever-evolving, mysterious and life-giving process. ‘How I Knew I Needed to Quit Instagram’ (New York Times) https://www.nytimes.com/2021/10/01/well/mind/instagram-quit.html Laura’s book: https://www.amazon.com/We-Are-Luckiest-Surprising-Magic/dp/160868654X/ The Luckiest Club: www.theluckiestclub.com Laura’s Website: www.lauramckowen.com Spotify playlist for this episode: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/478iRwMKSjbPbLBaJQaHsy?si=845f0479f47c4342 Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

How many times have you looked at your relationship partner and wondered, “Why do they do that?” Have we got an episode for you! Julie Menanno’s “The Secure Relationship” (@thesecurerelationship) Instagram account is a touchstone for many folks in the TMST community. In a sea of glib, pop psychology, and low nutrition, feel-good content, she's taken her work as a couple’s therapist and scholar and turned it into a feed that’s operating at a much higher level. In recent years, the concept of attachment styles - anxious types, avoidant types - has crept into our consciousness. Julie brings these concepts, and other ideas like attachment needs, emotional safety, and healthy vulnerability, to life in a smart, accessible way for almost half a million followers. Her first book, The Secure Relationship, and her latest, Secure Love, are shining a light on ways we can be more centered in our relationships - and how we can enjoy them more. Julie Menanno: https://www.thesecurerelationship.com/ The Secure Relationship IG account: https://www.instagram.com/thesecurerelationship/ Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST today so you can hear the uncut interviews, attend private events with Laura and help keep TMST ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/

What would life be like if we gave ourselves PERMISSION? Permission to truly chill, to feel deeply, to open up and express ourselves in ways that serve us - and others? Kristoffer “KC” Carter has A LOT of ideas about this. He’s the exact opposite of aspirational hustle culture and warmed over self help -- and he’s Laura’s coach! In this episode, Kristoffer shows us what happens when a disaffected sales dude goes deep into the world of meditation and spirituality and emerges as a Fortune 100 executive coach and unwavering advocate for every. single. one. of us. Have a pen and paper handy for this one, because the wisdom is flowing. The Four Permissions: https://www.thisepiclife.com/manifesto/ KC’s Book Permission To Glow: https://www.thisepiclife.com/book/ Meet KC: https://www.thisepiclife.com/about/ Tell Me Something True is a 100% independent podcast. There are no corporations or advertisers backing this community. We are 100% funded by the TMST community. Support TMST, hear uncut interviews, and keep it ad-free: https://tmst.supercast.com/ Join our free online community (it’s not a Facebook group!): https://www.tmstpod.com/