We (Dr. Jess and B writing here!) sincerely appreciate you using our affiliate links and discount code DRJESSVIP — your support sustains this work and allows us to keep creating evidence-based, sex-positive resources for everyone. Thank you so very much! (We receive a small commission and appreciate you for helping us). Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you!   Sex Terms You’ve Never Heard: From CBT to CEI & Beyond 🎧 Prefer to listen? This post is based on a Sex With Dr. Jess podcast episode featuring Sunny Megatron. Scroll down to listen or listen on Spotify or Apple Podcasts. What Counts as a "Normal" Fantasy? What turns someone on might surprise others—but that doesn’t make it wrong. In a world where sexual fantasies are often hidden behind closed doors and filtered out of mainstream studies, a growing vocabulary of kink and fetish acronyms reveals just how varied, creative, and expressive people’s desires can be. While a study out of Quebec found that fantasies such as swinging, BDSM, and threesomes are common and “normal” (with over half of participants reporting them), the reality is that many desires extend beyond the bounds of academic inquiry. That’s where lesser-known acronyms come in. Kink Acronyms 101: From Familiar to Fantastical Sex educator Sunny Megatron recently joined the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast to decode the sex terms that rarely show up in textbooks. From CEI to ASFR, here are a few that stand out: CBT: Cock and ball torture This can include everything from gentle squeezing to bondage, ball stretchers, clamps, and even full-contact ball busting. CEI: Cum eating instruction Often paired with JOI (jack off instruction), usually in a dom-sub dynamic, and frequently rooted in taboo play. SPH: Small penis humiliation Involves psychological play and consensual embarrassment. ABF: Adult breastfeeding fetish Not necessarily about lactation, but more often about the eroticism of care, comfort, and vulnerability. CFNM: Clothed female, nude male An inversion of mainstream objectification that centers the clothed partner’s power and gaze. ASFR: Alt sex robot fetish Sometimes referred to as technosexuality, especially relevant in a world where Bluetooth-connected toys like the We-Vibe Chorus and Lovehoney Sync 2 blur the lines between tech and touch. The Psychology of Kink: Power, Play & Permission Many of these fantasies involve submissive men and dominant women—a dynamic that directly challenges cultural norms of masculinity. Kinks like CEI or CFNM provide a mental reprieve from societal expectations of dominance and emotional suppression. This kind of exploration is not necessarily about the acts themselves, but about rewriting personal narratives around power, control, and vulnerability. For some, it’s healing. For others, it’s just hot. And for anyone looking to explore dominant/submissive roles in a playful way, a toy like the We-Vibe Pivot can be an excellent starting point. It’s discreet, app-controlled, and ideal for giving control to a partner—whether across the room or across the world. Shame, Humiliation & the Erotic Erotic humiliation is another thread running through many of these kinks. It’s not about degradation but about consensual embarrassment—such as being asked to perform a sexy task in front of others or being lovingly teased. These types of fantasies often stem from early experiences or internalized cultural messages. For those looking to process shame through pleasure,

A quick 'Thank You' from Dr. Jess and B (it really is us!) - Every time you shop using our links or the code DRJESSVIP, you’re investing in pleasure, education, and empowerment — and we’re so grateful to have you along for the ride. Thank you again. Your support means a lot to us! Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you!   Considering a Threesome? Start Here: Your Inclusive Guide to Pleasure, Consent & Connection You listened to Part I of our threesome series, and now you’re back for the practical prep. In Part II of our threesome discussion, we share questions and prompts to consider before you have a threesome — for individuals and couples. We also share some of our listeners’ insights on how to prep for a threesome and discuss couples’ privilege. Whether you’re single, partnered, or somewhere in between, use the prompts below to design an experience that feels thoughtful, consensual, and genuinely pleasurable for everyone involved. (If you missed our conversation with Dr. Justin Lehmiller, circle back for the research on who fantasizes, who follows through, and why the numbers don’t always match.) When (and IF) you’re onsidering moving from fantasy to action, check out this post on how to prepare for your first sex party and ease your nerves while maximizing pleasure. Sponsored Resources I’m partnering with Lovehoney, Womanizer and We-Vibe because they carry a wide range of body-safe toys and ship discreetly worldwide. Two personal favorites that are versatile for solo and partnered play: We-Vibe Tango X – a pinpoint external vibe that tucks easily between bodies We-Vibe Nova 2 – a flexible dual-stimulation toy; the external arm stays in contact even as you move. Use code DRJESSVIP at checkout for a site-wide discount. Code DRJESSVIP We-Vibe Nova 2 Save with Discount Code - DRJESSVIP • Dual stimulation with flexible clitoral arm = stays in place as you move & deep rumbly vibes. • App-controlled for solo or partner play from anywhere. • Waterproof & rechargeable — ready for bath, bed, or wherever you'd like. We-Vibe.com Lovehoney.com This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you!   (Affiliate partnerships help keep the educational content free; thank you for your support.) Threesome Preparation Toolkit Below are three sets of questions. Reflect on them solo, discuss with partners, or copy-paste into a shared doc. The goal is clarity—about desire, boundaries, and after-care. 1. Personal Reflection Threesomes: Self-Questionnaire  Why do you want to have a threesome? Where did the idea of a threesome come from? How do you feel about this source? What benefits do you expect to derive from a threesome? What are the perceived risks/costs? With whom would you like to have a threesome? Do you know if they’re open to it? How might your relationship with your threesome mates change post-threesome? What excites you most about a threesome? What motivates you? What concerns you about a threesome? Do you have any hesitations? What emotional elements of a threesome have you considered? How will you manage potentially challenging emotions should they arise? Do you feel comfortable communicating your desires and boundaries? What conditions increase your comfort level with open communication?

Most people fantasize about threesomes, but not many people - actually dive in. In part I of our Threesomes podcast, we dive into the data and get some practical advice from Justin Lehmiller - who answers your questions including: How common are threesomes? What counts as a threesome? How does a threesome affect relationships for couples? Who is having threesomes? How do people find threesomes (e.g. through apps like Feeld)? What’s the appeal of threesomes? Next week, we’ll dive into how to prep for a threesome with prompts, conversations and more! Save with code PODCAST on the Mindful Sex Course on the Happier Couples website. And if you have podcast questions, please submit them here. You can find the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. All About Threesomes Episode 336 [00:00:00] Jess O'Reilly: Hey, hey, we are talking threesomes today and we are doing a throwback to a two part series with Dr. Justin Lehmiller on the doc today, because I received three questions about threesomes over the weekend and I think it's a sign. So here we go. Have a listen to this throwback with Dr. Justin Lehmiller. [00:00:27] Jess O'Reilly: You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. [00:00:38] Brandon Ware: Welcome to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. [00:00:45] Jess O'Reilly: Hey, hey, we are talking threesomes today and it fits that today's episode is brought to you by FIELD. And FIELD is the first dating app for couples and singles. They're a pioneer in allowing couples to kind of explore dating together as a pair, and they're open to all genders, all sexual identities, [00:01:13] Jess O'Reilly: all sexual orientations from basically for anyone who's interested in either ethical non monogamy or alternative relationship structures, or simply those who are curious and looking to kind of dip their toe into the pond. So do check them out. Field is spelt feel and a D so F E E L D and you can download the field app. [00:01:25] Jess O'Reilly: It's free and you create a profile. And once you have liked someone and they've liked you back on the app. You become connections and you're able to chat. And if you want to, you can share photos and they also often offer an upgraded membership option with extra features. And yeah, so do check out FIELD. [00:01:43] Jess O'Reilly: They're one of the largest online communities for fun stuff like this. And it's interesting. I actually came across FIELD in my research a few years ago. when I was prepping a training for therapists on threesomes and ethical non monogamy and they really are the [00:02:00] perfect partner for this podcast because we're talking about threesomes and of course there are people on field looking for threesomes and later we're going to be talking with their expert Dr. [00:02:08] Jess O'Reilly: Justin Leigh. But before he joins us, I wanted to kind of dig into some of the data on threesomes. And later on, I also want to talk if we have time about how to prepare for a threesome, like in terms of communication and reflection and just topics to address before you start exploring. I don't know how much time we'll have. [00:02:27] Jess O'Reilly: I might have to split it into a couple episodes, but we will get there. It's interesting because when you think about. Threesomes. Don't you think porn has kind of made threesomes seem like, like they're the norm. Everybody's doing them. Yeah, I mean when

This week, we share (and try out!) a simple 3-step exercise to reflect upon 2021 and plan for a happy 2022. Coach Sonia Zarbatany also joins us to talk about our new coaching program and share her tips for better dating and happy marriage. Thank you to our sponsors Adam and Eve. You can get 50% off almost any item + get FREE shipping + some Free goodies too if you use code DRJESS Make the most of your relationships in 2022 with our 30-day program! There is no better investment than an investment in connection. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Year-End Reflection Questions for Fulfilling Relationships You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and Relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host, Brandon Ware, here with my lovely other half. Dr. Jess. Happy New Year's Eve. Happy New Year. Yes. Will we make it? Stay awake until midnight tonight? Oh, I don't know, man. I'm up early. You're up early? No, I'm going to make it. I'm going to make it. I'm going to enjoy this evening. I have this silly superstition that whatever I'm doing at midnight sets the tone for the year, which, by the way, lying in bed with you fast asleep wouldn't be a bad thing because I'd like better sleep in 2022, I would be relaxed. Exactly. Yeah. So we'll either be toasting with a bit of champagne and some nice fresh air, or we'll be fast asleep. Can I just say that I would like very much for next year at this point to be raging somewhere. I want to be partying. Yeah, I want to light my pants on fire. You know what? I know that desire has some sort of party going on in Brazil, 20, 22, 23. So let's just hope, sadly, I don't think the world is going to be that far ahead that we're going to want to be partying in Brazil, but hopefully something just a little bit more exciting overall, things can be looking up, and we want them to be looking up, certainly in your relationships, which is something we're going to be talking about today. I think folks know if you follow me and if you listen to the podcast, I have a new program starting in five days, six days. And Sonya, my partner in the program, is going to be joining us to chat a little bit about dating and coaching and the program, and also just her general insight and advice on how to make relationships work. So before Sonya joins us, I wanted to get to one of your questions because this one is about vibrators. So this person says they want to incorporate vibrators into their sex lives. They're really great help for having an orgasm, but they find that their orgasms with vibrators don't always feel good. The ramp up is amazing and feels great, but just at the point when it feels like the orgasm is going to start happening, the sensation suddenly becomes overwhelming and kind of unpleasant if they keep the vibrator right there. So they said they've tried quickly turning down the vibrator intensity right at the point of orgasm. But this can feel jarring and sort of interrupt the sensations. And then if they completely take the stimulation away at orgasm, it doesn't feel good either. And the orgasm sort of just stops. So it sounds like a ruined orgasm, which feels frustrating. So any thoughts on why the vibrations become so overwhelmingly intense at the point of org...

We’re doing it again! There is almost nothing better than sharing how you feel about your partner, and this “dating profile” gift is a simple, powerful gift that keeps on giving. Jess’ cousin Annabella & her cousin-in-law Denise (Anna’s mom) join us to share this homemade, no-cost, gift: a thoughtful and simple dating profile written for a loved one. Jess also shares one she wrote for her Mom, and Brandon and Jess share one another’s. We encourage you to try this one yourself and let us know how it goes! Huge shout out to our sponsor, AdamAndEve.com — You can get 50% off almost any item + get FREE shipping + some Free goodies too if you use code DRJESS If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. The Best Gift Ever! Its Free & Last-Minute Friendly You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess Podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight! Hey! Hey! Happy Holidays. Hope they are going well. Hope you're hanging in. Hope they're fairly harmonious and joyful and healthy and delicious if you... If you love to eat and are celebrating. It's so weird to think that the holidays are already upon us. Because I think back to December 2020 and I think about where I was and what we were doing. And whom we were with. If feels like. It feels like five years ago honestly, but at the same time it feels like this year has kinda flashed by in the blink of an eye. I know everyone is talking about this concept of time both zooming and standing still. And you know when I think about the holidays, I I feel that. I feel that so much. And our plan was to produce a new episode on The Best Gift Ever. So this gift that I just... I think is so incredible for all relationships. And so I went back and listened to last year's version with my cousin-in-law Denise and my cousin Anna. And has I was listening and I was just like Oh I wanna listen again. Love hearing them. Uh. I love the experience for myself and so I decided we're just we're gonna run it again. Because, honestly I just love it and I feel good about it. And I... you know I don't always feel good about every piece of content I produce. But I feel pretty good about this one. So, without further ado. Here she is. The Best Gift Ever 2020 version. You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the ex. Doctor just podcast. I'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half doctor jess this is pretty much the the last one of the year. I guess we have on next week. But i don't know christmas for me. Always feels like the end of year. I would agree. i mean. there's a wrap up vibe. That's going on right now. Yeah but a weird year where we almost don't even know what's coming right. People are asking for meetings for january. And i'm like january. That feels so long ago. But i guess it's here again now it's the end of the year and there is no better time to check in with your health so our partner. Let's get checked. Lets you do all of your health testing from home from hormones to thyroid to. Sgi's to cholesterol. Iron lime disease test from home send it in and get secure results online go to. Let's get checked dot com and please use code dr jess to save and to let them know you heard about their services here now babe last year around this time we did an e...

How do you know if opening up is right for you? How do you tell your partner that you’re interested in ethical/consensual non-monogamy? What’s the difference between swinging and polyamory? What if you want a different ENM arrangement than your partner (e.g. they want to swing and you want to explore polyamory) Sex Goddess & Erotic Educator Taylor Sparks joins us to share her experience and advice. She is the founder of Organic Loven, the largest BIPOC owned online organic intimacy shop & works to improve sex lives around the world. You can check out her YouTube channel and follow Taylor on her Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter accounts. We're also excited to announce a new program for 2022: 30 Days to Master Your Relationship! 4 Group coaching sessions Week 1: Relational Values & Blueprint Week 2: Emotional & Relational Communication Week 3: Bedroom Mastery Week 4: Re(Ignite) The Spark + Ladies Night Event in Montreal If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Ethical Non-Monogamy & Open Relationships You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess's podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your cohost, Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half. Dr. Jess, how are you doing? I'm really good. Why is that? I don't know. I like the Christmas tree in my house. I'm just really liking the way my house looks this week. I will say that the Christmas tree smells great. It smells so good. And I was reading this is not a purposeful segue, but I was reading that more couples are now putting their Christmas trees in their bedrooms. Really? Yeah. Because it gives it does surprise me. It's the glow and the smell and all the health benefits of feeling like you're in a forest. Yeah, that's what it is. I'm serious. I feel like you're in a forest. I think it just has to do with it. All of our houses are getting so much smaller and there's nowhere to put, like, the Christmas tree takes up like a third of our living room. Yes, it does. It's blocking the whole patio door. It's a great third, though. It looks really good. It does look really good. Yeah. So I'm in a good mood and we're going to be talking to my friend Taylor Sparks from Organic Lovin in just a moment. Yes, I'm looking forward to it. It should be a good chat. Absolutely. I think we're going to talk about she sent me so many topics, but we're going to talk about non monogamy and get some perspective and personal experience on that. And before Taylor joins us, I wanted to chat to folks for a moment about a new course I have coming up. It is a group coaching course for 30 days. It's a four week program to master your relationships in 30 days. And so this is for the New Year. I'm really hoping folks will either sign up as singles or as couples and jumpstart the new year focusing on relationships because so many of our resolutions really center on. I think the body and habits. And I think it's actually really cool. I love the New Year. I love the idea of a reset. It's the same reason I love Mondays. Really? You love Mondays? For that reason, you feel like it's a reset. Yeah. I'm just like, okay. This week is going to be the week I start working out. Or this week is going to be the week that I get a better night's sleep.

We’re answering your questions this week including: Can you please talk about fart fetishes? Should I be worried that my new boyfriend finds pleasure in pain? Can you share some embarrassing ways people masturbate? How do I clean my vagina? We're also excited to announce a new program for 2022: 30 Days to Master Your Relationship! 4 Group coaching sessions Week 1: Relational Values & Blueprint Week 2: Emotional & Relational Communication Week 3: Bedroom Mastery Week 4: Re(Ignite) The Spark + Ladies Night Event in Montreal Use code* DRJESS25 to save 25% off on even the higher-end toys on TSC's Intimately You website. Code is still valid for another week! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Fetishes, Pleasure In Pain & Masturbation You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and Relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your cohost, Brandon Air here with my lovely other half. Dr. Jess. How's it going? I'm good. We're on an early early morning this morning for the podcast. Has the caffeine kicked in? Oh, well, I didn't sleep much last night and I'm actually having a caffeinated coffee, which, for me, is rare, which means everybody better hold on. This unfiltered version of jets. No, I literally just drink it. It's going to be people in an hour who have to deal with me. Okay, where I'm like, let's do this. We can build an airplane. I can improve upon airplane. That's my dream. I have some exciting stuff to announce today, starting with a contest that we're running over on Instagram. I don't know if you know about it. It's called Mask and Masturbate. Do I know about Instagram? Yes. Instagram is a social media platform where you can post your photos and it's worth billions of dollars. It's actually part of the Metaverse. Don't mess around. I'm venturing down the rabbit hole. Okay. All right. So I'm running a contest called Mask and Masturbate in partnership with Consonant and Consonant on Instagram is Consonant Life. They were started locally, I believe. Here in Canada. They are a queer owned brand. My mom has been shopping at Concentrate for a while, which I have to say is the greatest testament to their products. Because my mom,

This week we discuss therapy and emotional expression with the mental health practitioner and author of Man, Just Express Yourself, James Harris. He shares advice for those who are resistant to therapy, as well as tips for opening up and getting your loved ones to do the same. You can order your copy of "Man, Just Express Yourself" and the Cheesy Date Board Game. You can find James' book and board game on his website. And follow his Instagram and YouTube channels to stay up to date with James. Holidays are coming up, and TSC's Intimately You has holiday prices going on. And you can get an additional 25% off with my code* DRJESS25 - Toys from Lelo, We-Vibe, Romp, and so much more. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! https://happiercouples.com/wp-content/uploads/James-Harris-Promo.mp4 *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Emotional Expression: How To Open Up Participant #1: You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and Relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host, Brandon. We're here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Hello. Hey, how are you doing? I'm good. How are you feeling today? I feel good. Is there something you want to add to that? Well, we're going to be talking about emotional expression and specifically men expressing themselves emotionally interesting. But all people. Yeah. I mean, I think talking about men expressing themselves is interesting because growing up, I didn't express myself very much. And even now, I don't know that I express myself the way that I should with other men in my life. Do you feel like you express yourself to me? I think I do. And then I have these moments where I think I should tell you what I'm feeling. And maybe I'm just feeling super emotional. I had a moment the other day when I was just wanting to come up and tell you how much I care about you and how much I love you and what you mean to me and how much you do for me. And you know what? I didn't do it. I'm telling you that I thought about it then. So you're listening now. But in the moment, I didn't think about that. Now I have so many opportunities to tell you that, whereas with because I'm always because you always. But with the friends, the men in my life, the male presence in my life.

  Want to give a hotter hand job? Check out our quick tips, and then join us as we switch gears and have a candid discussion with a Hotwife couple, John & Tiffany. They talk about their story -- from high school sweethearts to the parents of two teens — to a very happy couple in the Hotwife lifestyle. They share how they got started and explain why they find Hotwifing so fulfilling — and why you might too! To stay up to date with Tiffany and John's hotwife lifestyle and with them. You can follow their Instagram. Thank you for engaging with our content and tuning into the podcast! We’re so grateful to connect with curious minds and listeners. From both of us — Dr. Jess and B — we appreciate you. You can support our work (and your pleasure) by browsing our favourite sexual wellness products and using the code DRJESSVIP to save when checking out. Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! Hotwife Lifestyle & Hand Job Techniques: Exploring Intimacy, Pleasure & Partnership Let’s be honest — hand jobs often get a bad rap. But done right, they can rival (or even outdo) a mouth, a toy, or a full-body session. We open this episode with a simple, powerful technique I call The Claudia: two hands, interlaced fingers, more lube than you think you need, and firm pressure on the lower third of the penis. Add some rhythm, a twist at the head, and breathy encouragement? You’ve got yourself a solo or partnered experience that’s deeply connective, intensely pleasurable, and wildly underestimated. And let’s not forget: if you’re keen to explore the sensual spectrum with extra support, tools like the We-Vibe Melt or the We-Vibe Touch add suction or vibration to elevate your stroke game. Code DRJESSVIP We-Vibe Melt Discount Code - DRJESSVIP •Pleasure Air™ tech mimics oral with touchless suction. •App-controlled & Whisper-quiet - for hands-free, long-distance, or partner play. •Dr Jess Says - The technology is really unique and blends pulsing, sucking and vibrating all in one toy. We-Vibe.com Lovehoney.com This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! Hand play can also be the perfect segue into fantasy talk — and in this episode, we make that transition with a real-life story from Tiffany and John, high school sweethearts turned happily married parents who’ve been exploring the Hotwife lifestyle for over a decade. What Is the Hotwife Lifestyle? While definitions vary, Tiffany explains that in their relationship, the “hotwife” arrangement means she engages in sexual encounters with men outside their marriage — with John’s enthusiastic support. Sometimes he watches. Sometimes she dates solo. What’s constant is their communication, mutual consent, and shared joy. This isn’t cuckolding. It’s not coercion. It’s not rooted in deficit. As John beautifully puts it, “She was a hotwife before we ever heard the term.” They share their story — from their first unexpected encounter with a tennis player while on vacation, to their first experience with another couple at Desire Resorts. “How Do I Convince My Partner?” is the Wrong Question Every week, we get messages asking how to “convince” a partner to try non-monogamy. The truth? If your partner isn’t into it, that’s okay. Desire must be mutual — and not manipulated. As John says: “Don’t go to the internet first. Start with a conversation.

What does it mean to be non-binary? How about gender fluid? And queer? Why does language matter? How can we reconnect with our bodies? How can we liberate ourselves from gender roles in the name of more pleasure? How can we effectively communicate our needs to partners? Non-Binary Gender & Sex Therapist-Turned Coach, Rae McDaniel joins us to answer these questions and more. Be sure to follow Rae's Instagram and Facebook accounts. As well, check out the Gender Fck for more information. And take advantage of holiday pricing and discount code* DRJESS25 at TSC.ca where you can shop for: High On Love The Minis Pleasure Collection Romp Toys We-Vibe Moxie Chrystalino Glass Dildo If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! https://happiercouples.com/wp-content/uploads/Rae-McDaniel-Promo.mp4 *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Finding Pleasure in Liberation: Gender, Body Image & Communication 0:05 You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. 0:15 Welcome to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon. We're here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. 0:22 Hey, today we are talking about gender. So we're going to go over some terminology talk about gender roles and how they affect pleasure and sex and relationships. And so a lot of pressure right around gender, I would think kind of growing up you had expectations as a boy what you're supposed to do what you're not supposed to do, even as a man, you're an adult man now, right, 0:41 right. Yeah, I've been told I'm physiologically an adult man. Yeah, you're still a boy. 0:46 Okay, but so much pressure. I didn't I mean, certainly for women. I just feel like the pressure kind of comes from all angles. And it you know, it happens in the bedroom, in the living room, in the boardroom, all across the board. And so we're going to be talking with Ray McDaniel, who's going to just help us to unpack some of the the messaging and maybe make some small changes for happier lives and better sex and before we welcome ray to the conversation, I want to give a big shout out to TS see and intimately you so intimately you is the show that I host in partnership with TSC it airs on Citytv Fridays at midnight in Canada and if you'r...

What is pegging, and how do you get started? How do you choose the right harness and strap-on? What are the best positions for pegging? Why do you lose your erection during butt play? What are the best toys for all types of orgasms? What is the difference between a fetish and a kink? Luna Matatas joins us to answer these questions and much more as she walks us through sex across Canada — from Charlottetown, PEI to Lions Bay, BC. Check out our recommendations below, as well as Lovehoney’s Sex Map of Canada: Best quiet toy (oral simulator): Womanizer Premium  Best quiet toy (newcomer): Ioba OMG Best Clone-A-Willy: Lovehoney Best Stroker: Lovehoney Blowmotion Real Feel — Save 25% this month with code* DRJESS25 Best Advanced Penis Toy: ArcWave Ion Follow Luna on her Twitter and Instagram accounts. As well, check out her website and her podcast, The Plug. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! https://happiercouples.com/wp-content/uploads/Luna-Matatas-IG-video.mp4 *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Pegging, Fetishes & Sex Toys 0:05 You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the sex of Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon. We're here with my always lovely other half to Dr. Jess. Hello. How are you? 0:23 I'm amazing. I'm kind of like I'm on top of the world because my work is getting back to normal. I got to host a couple's retreat last weekend over in the UK. And that felt so damn good. I mean, you were there. You know, you weren't at the retreat. But you were at the bar after with me. 0:39 Yeah, and you were definitely in great spirits. And I got to walk around London, which was amazing. Because London is an amazing city. 0:46 It really is a cool city. All the Marvel they took from all over the world made it a beautiful beautiful place a story for another day. But yeah, I'm feeling really good. It feels just I'm sure everybody's having kind of small victories as we slowly very very slowly inch our way back to some normalcy depending on where where folks are living. And yeah, I guess we probably get these glimmers of hope or excitement and then I'm sure there are of course setbacks as well. But I'm also off to Boston tomorrow, or Harvard sex week. 1:18

Harper The Fox joins Jess & Brandon to share her story — 2 weeks postpartum. She talks about her work in camming, cartoon cam models, working on OnlyFans and Chaturbate while pregnant & the importance of supporting mental health for sex workers. Check out Jewelry.sex if you'd like to support Harper and, even better, support Pineapple Support. All 2021 profits will be donated to help provide free and low-cost mental health support to any and all active sex workers with the therapists at Pineapple Support. And to stay up to date with Harper, follow her Twitter, and learn more about when her new book, "The Grateful Winter" (working title), comes out, get notified from HarperTheFox Books. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Camming, Mental Health & Motherhood 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight in welcome to the sex with dr podcast. I'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess. Hey how are you feeling feeling all right. Pretty good getting back into the groove of things. Yeah and today. We're actually going to be chatting with harper. The fox awesome name. Es and you weren't here. The last time harper was on the program but harper is a performer and digital entrepreneur and her unedited sex tapes feature her having real loving sex with her partner of a boat. I think ten years. Now 'cause i think it was around seven years the last time we talked. And i definitely recommend you go back and listen to the old episode with harper. Because in our last conversation she shared like just kind of really unique sites into camping into porn. She's also a poet. I think she talked about how to use toilet. Paper rolls sex dolls. There was a lot of a lot of conversation there. So she's she's coming back to update us on her work post pregnancy because she just had a baby like two weeks ago. I'm very intrigued on multiple levels here. I'm still going back to thinking about the sex dolls toilet paper rolls. So i will need to revisit dot podcast so Before harper joins us. I wanted to talk about a topic. That has come up in a couple of my recent interviews and then when i've posted about it i've received a lot of what would be the word passionate response from folks around going to bed angry. Well told me more. I'm not really sure where to take this charles so basically we started with this conversation around. Is there any truth to the phrase never go to sleep angry at your partner or is it a myth and so thinking about our relationship. We've definitely gone to bed angry. You try not to go to feel. We've i've tried to rectify an issue. But i still am angry when i go to. Bed doesn't happen very often but it more but i think back. We used to fight at night. Do remember that we still do fight. It just tends to happen and actually. That's something i should probably reflect on. Why do i start fights. Or why do i get into arguments late at night and don't feel like it happens as much as of late but i remember like a time where it would be an i mean i know why i. I don't know why. I think. I know why we fought at night. That's when you come together it will only time. We have privacy right downstairs in the living room. My dad's the dining room. It adds to the office.

We love hearing from you, and this week, we answer your sex and relationship questions including: How do I help my partner relax and enjoy hotter sex? Should we open our relationship up to swinging? How do I deal with my friends shaming me for making porn? Should I share my secret erotica with my wife? To learn more on the Mindful Sex Course mentioned in the podcast, check it out here. https://happiercouples.com/wp-content/uploads/Womanizer-Premium-Eco.mp4 You can save 25% off all sexual wellness products (including the high-end brands!) at TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou using *code DRJESS25 Includes whole suite of products from Womanizer including the Premium Eco and the Arcwave Ion (the penis version). The code also works on the Tightra, a device that helps you work on incontinence, bladder control, lubrication, and sexual functions. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How To Seduce & Make Sex More Pleasurable 00:00:05 - 00:05:16 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast. i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess willow. Hello how're you doing. Good how about you. I'm great thanks for asking Angry because today we're doing a qna. And i get to read a bunch of questions and put you on the spot as to what the answers are gonna put you on the spot. I i know you are. We've been receiving so many questions and so many emails. And i want to quickly note to folks that if you can send them the our website that's easier for me than through instagram. I tried to get to the ones on instagram. But sometimes they get lost. And i can't always get to them. So if you sent your questions and we haven't gotten to them please feel free to resend them via the website. Because i do try and get to them. And even if i can't answer them here i try and send you links and stuff like that. But i've been having trouble keeping up with instagram. And it's funny. Because i don't know where this message went but somebody wrote me a message and i can't find it. Now so this is you please resend it about how i guess. I said something about not writing a five paragraph essay.

Before we begin... (Dr. Jess and B here). We want to express our thanks and gratitude to you for reading and engaging with our site. We sincerely appreciate it, and you! Without any pressure, if you feel inclined to use our affiliate links, please enter the discount code DRJESSVIP at checkout. You’re not just getting a deal — you’re helping us keep the pleasure-positive content flowing (we receive a small commission). Thank you! Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! Pleasure, Spanking & Masculinity: A Conversation with King Noire King Noire is an accomplished and award-winning writer, porn performer, artist, Master Fetish Trainer, MC, and global activist using the proceeds of his album Music Is My Weapon™ to build a school, freshwater well, and medical clinic in West Africa. He raises consciousness around kink safety for people of color, provides lectures on the decolonization of sexuality, and offers sex education to audiences ranging from college students to medical providers. Check out King Noire's website here, and follow him on his social media accounts - Instagram and Twitter. Thank you for reading and engaging with our content. Your support means the world to us. If you're shopping for pleasure products, please consider visiting our affiliates (here) and use our discount code DRJESSVIP to save when checking out — your clicks help support our site and the free content we create (we receive a small commission). Redefining Masculinity, Spanking with Intention & Ethical Porn The inimitable King Noire shares his perspective of pleasure, pansexuality, performance and much more in this candid conversation with Jess & Brandon. King Noire — an award-winning performer, master fetish trainer, music artist, and educator joined us for an unfiltered conversation live from Sex Down South in Atlanta. We explored everything from pansexual performance and impact play to somnophilia, ethical porn, and raising sons with care and intention. What is a Master Fetish Trainer? King and his partner Jet Setting Jasmine coined the term to reflect their work supporting folks as they discover and embody their fetishes safely. Whether you’re learning to flog, exploring choking and breath play, or simply figuring out what turns you on, their work is grounded in safety, education, and consent. And if you’re new to spanking? King offers this tip: Start slow and sensual. Build intensity over time, alternate sensations, and never assume your partner wants to be hit hard just because they say they’re into impact. Communication is king. And so is practice.   If you're ready to explore sensation and power play, a great first step could be incorporating a dual-purpose vibe like the We-Vibe Sync 2, or try the We-Vibe Touch to blend sting and sensuality in foreplay. Code DRJESSVIP We-Vibe Sync 2 Discount Code - DRJESSVIP •  Adjustable Fit: Customizes to your shape for comfort and targeted pleasure. •  Dual Stimulation: Vibrates against the clitoris and G-spot during penetration. •  Remote + App Control: Perfect for play across the room — or across the world. • Dr. Jess says: "I recommend Sync 2 for couples who want to stay connected through every pulse and position.” Shop at We-Vibe.com Shop at Lovehoney.com This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you!

Sex educator Justine Ang Fonte joins us to talk about porn literacy, how parents can talk to kids about pleasure, and how we can set boundaries with friends, loved ones, and partners. She shares the three things parents should consider when talking to kids about sex and online content as well advice on how to get over our discomforts talking about sex. She also walks us through some challenging scenarios and provides scripts for saying no and asking for what you want. If you need help setting a boundary, DM @_good.byes, and Justine will do her best to help you out! And be sure to follow Justine on her Instagram and Twitter accounts! And if you have any questions about sexual health, be sure to tune into Tightra’s Facebook Live on October 27th at 8 pm ET. Tightra is an at-home device to improve urinary incontinence and improve sexual functioning. Learn more here and use code* DRJESS25 to save. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! https://happiercouples.com/wp-content/uploads/IY-S2-E1-Tightra-Social.mp4  *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Porn Literacy, Communication & Setting Boundaries With Loved Ones 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight! Welcome to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co-host Brandon Ware, here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Hello today. We are going to be talking ghosting and boundaries and porn literacy and much more with the lovely Justine Ang Fonte. Are are you good at boundaries. Not good at all boundaries really. Think you're good at boundary. I'm terrible but i think you're much better than me like i guess next to a f- student like me. If you're a see that that looks pretty good. You look like a bar is low. I've got a. I've got a low bar. I mean in some ways and with some people. I'm getting better. But i find that if i've if i've been poor at setting boundaries for awhile. It's hard for me to start them whereas in newer relationships. I can be a bit better. So we're going to have to get into. It would just dean but before she joins us. I wanna let you know about an online event. I have coming up with tight tightrope by silken so. This is on october twenty seventh so this coming wednesday at eight pm.

Dr. Sonjia, the author of the best-selling book Sex in South Beach, joins us to talk about the intersection of sexuality and medicine, how to have better sex, and the ultimate date night indulgence. Follow Dr.Sonjia on her Twitter and Instagram accounts to stay up to date. And to learn more about her practice drop by her website and listen to her podcast, Sex in South Beach. Check out our amazing sponsor Ioba Toys for their OhMyG and OhMyC toys! The OhMyG (G-Spot massager) and the OhMyC (clitoral massager) fit in the palm of your hand and are both super silent. Don't forget to use my discount code DRJESS to get 30% off. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Date Night Special & Sex In South Beach 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight the podcast. I'm your host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half. Dr jess you've been. Mia i have been in a long time. Since i've heard you say you're the i don't even know what you say you're the co host the co-pilot i i'm here back and today. We're gonna be talking about some interesting topics at the intersection of sex and medicine. What makes sex good. What makes a date night. Successful this also. I'm very interested in what makes sex good. I really miss that. Will what makes good to you. Who excitement while. That's so vague. I know you're put me on the spot. I think it kind of just depends how i'm feeling. Sometimes they want you to do new things sometimes what you do the same things. So what determines like whether sex was good or bad we've had sex in the last week and you know one time was good and one time wasn't as good. What's the difference. I'm trying to think so for me. It's just being in the right mindset being relaxed in one time there. I find the sex a whole lot more intense like i find. I can really zone in so for me. It doesn't sound sexy at all but what makes sex is just being in the right head space like being present. Yeah being present. And being into the moment because i find what undistracted i just don't enjoy sex's much will you say it doesn't sound sexy but that's a lot of what the data says right is like good lovers good. Lovers are present in the moment and not thinking about performing yet. And i think people want i mean i talk to people and i think they're hoping for a magic pill. If you do this everything will always be awesome. And just like the arch position. Please tell me. I have this Press up out right now. I have to respond. To and it's about how to do the arch position so for the arch position I guess person okay. So one person does a bridge like you know like they put their hands already. Hurt myself so i don't even know what breast gymnastic bridge not like the yoga bridge. Okay beginning this wrong so please. Don't you talking about a back bridge back. Bend liquid hanan. I do on the paddleboard. So folks you imagine you're standing straight up and you're standing with your feet on the ground and then you lean back and put your hands on the ground. Of course you can do it from lying on your back as well. It's like a backwards. You yes yes. So you're like a rainbow so is descriptive people. But the rest. Because i feel like. I've already pulled my penis points so you would get into a back...

What is a trauma trigger? How does it show up in the body? How can you recognize your triggers and communicate your needs to your partner? As the partner of someone who has experienced trauma, how can you be more supportive? Therapist Anna Baxter joins us to share their knowledge about therapy, trauma, working with couples, and more. They’ve also kindly shared this resource to help you communicate your needs to your partner. Follow Anna on their Twitter and Facebook accounts to stay up to date. Check out the Love Positive Counseling website to learn more! And don’t forget to check out Intimately You With Dr. Jess — Fridays at midnight on CityTV presented by TSC. You can save 25% off all sexual wellness products (including the high-end brands!) at TSC.ca/IntimatelyYou using *code DRJESS25 If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Trauma Triggers In Relationships 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice. You can use tonight today. We are talking about trauma and how it affects sex and relationships and i am by gender and relationship therapist ana baxter thank you so much for being here very welcome now. You work with folks in relationships singles groups all of the above. What have you been seeing over the last little while any shifts in challenges or reasons why people are coming in. oh yeah with the pandemic. We've had so much more. Just general depression and anxieties and stuff like that And lots of relationships who are starting to realize like. Oh when i'm trapped in a house with somebody Necessarily work anymore. And i'm to try this poly-amorous thing but she didn't know how it goes. When people try us. Paul pauline marie to fix broken relationship. Yes and is is it often one person hoping to. Yeah yeah what do you do when one partner really wants to open up. Especially when they started as monogamous and the other partners not so keen. We usually start with kind of understanding that. Paul amory's a valid option. And then we kind of get into a little bit of education about neurological change of thoughts and feelings. Is that sort of thing to kind of support the partner who's not early thinking about all.

Superstar Tyomi Morgan shares her advice and insights on Authentic Tantra and how you can integrate the practice into your life for more pleasure and connection — in and out of the bedroom. To learn more about Tyomi, follow her on her Instagram and Twitter accounts. And don’t forget that TSC’s Intimately You With Dr. Jess is launching for season 2 on CityTV tonight (October 1, 2021) at midnight. Tune in for a great discussion on sex and aging with Dr. Jessica Shepherd. And if you’re shopping for sexual wellness products at TSC.ca, be sure to use DRJESS25 for a deep discount!* If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! *Promo Code DRJESS25 is valid from September 29, 2021 at 10:00pm ET – December 18, 2021 at 11:59pm ET. Promo code may be redeemed on regular purchase price, This Visit Only Price, Event Price and Blockbuster Price before S&H charges and taxes on products as identified on Intimately You with Dr Jess (tsc.ca/intimatelyyou). Promo code cannot be redeemed on our TODAY’S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer, Encore TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ offer or Exclusive For You TODAY'S SHOWSTOPPER™ Presale offer, or redeemed for cash, or used towards payment of the TSC Credit Card. Offer cannot be combined with any other offer or discount (including Rogers employee discounts). All "Last Chance Price Final Sale" and "Clearance Price Final Sale" purchases are final, no returns or exchanges. Offer subject to change without notice. To redeem your Promo Code when making a purchase online at tsc.ca, enter it into the PROMOTIONAL CODE area upon checkout. If shopping by phone call 1-888-2020-888 and quote the Promo Code to the Customer Care Representative. ©2021 Rogers Media. Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Tantra with Tyomi 00:00:05 - 00:05:04 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Hey hey it is a good day for me today. I hope it's a good one for you as well. I even though i'm without brandon. Today i'm about to be joined by superstars sexologist model instructor sex educator tie you mean morgan who is just honestly so incredible. And i think you're really going to going to enjoy this conversation and we're gonna be talking about touch and taunt tra and breath and so much more and also really excited. Because i have some really good news october first so for many of you. That's today is the launch of season. Two of intimately you dr just presented by tse and it is a tv show on city tv across canada fridays at midnight and you can also watch the replay from anywhere in the world that tse dot ca slash intimately you which of course is quite the mouthful. Maybe not good kind of full. So i'll definitely put the lincoln the show notes. It's also you can always get these key links. My instagram bio. We've got all of those there if you wanna check them out anyhow with the show i'm going to be hosting weekly discussions exploring a bunch of exciting and also explicit topics related to relationships and sex and intimacy with some really incredible experts and medical professionals. And this week's episode is all about sex post menopause so we're going to be talking. Menopause menopause postmenopausal with the fabulous. Dr jessica shepherd a friend of mine so do please make sure you tune in and every week to catch new episodes on just a a broad range of themes.

Maggie (our student intern), interviews Dr. Ryan Conrad, an activist, artist, and scholar. They discuss activism within academia, issues within queer politics, radical openness, sex work, and more. Dr. Conrad shares insight on his contradicting feelings related to academia, gay marriage, and intersectional versus co-constituted identity. And of course, Dr. Conrad shares his career story and advice for those looking to work in the field of sexuality. To see more of Dr. Conrad’s work, check out https://www.faggotz.org. Thank you to our sponsor, AdamAndEve.com — use code DRJESS for 50% off almost any item + FREE shipping + FREE gifts today! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Maggie (00:00): Hi everyone, my name is Maggie, I’m a student at Concordia University in the Simone de Beauvoir institute, and I’ve been working as Dr. Jess’ intern over the summer. I initially started this mini podcast series initially to explore different jobs in the sexuality field, as a resource for people who might be interested in a career in sexuality. However, during my interviews I found that much more interesting topics came up, like sex education, “sexperts,” racial and social justice, sex and disability, activism in academia, sex and substance abuse, sex and cancer, queer and sex worker politics, prison abolition, health care, and a whole range of topics related to sex and sexuality. So in this podcast, I’ll be speaking with Dr. Ryan Conrad, who I know because he was my first professor within the sexuality program. And Dr. Conrad is really interesting because he is both an anarchist and an academic. He’ll be talking about some really important issues like queer politics, activism in academia, sex worker research, and more. Hi, Ryan, thank you for talking to me today. How are you?   Dr. Ryan Conrad (01:10): Hi, Maggie, I'm doing well.   Maggie (01:12): That's good to hear. So jumping right in, on your website, you describe yourself as an activist, an artist, and an academic. Can you briefly go over some of the work that you do?   Dr. Ryan Conrad (01:20): Yeah, so I sort of go by all of those titles, when it's useful to be one of them, if that makes sense, in terms of making oneself legible in certain situations. So sometimes I'm an activist, sometimes an artist, sometimes a scholar or an academic, and sometimes all three at the same time. But I'm very much by any medium necessary, if that makes sense. So depending on the goal of what I'm doing, I'm more of an activist or an artist or a scholar. And so I work sort of at the intersections of sexual liberation, queer politics, sex worker politics. And I do everything from teaching in sort of more academic settings, to running workshops and stuff in more community based settings, as well as making cultural production or cultural work, whether it's film or video or performance, sometimes just visual art. So maybe what I'm trying to say is I'm a multidisciplinary, interdisciplinary kind of person, and depending on what the goal of a particular event or situation or experiences I engage in, in different forms, different practices, to sort of make things happen, so to speak.   Maggie (02:26): I love that. And I think those three titles, you know, academic, artist,

Can you handle rejection? Have you practised this essential life skill? What can you learn from rejection? And how can you check your avoidance behaviours? Couples and Intimacy Therapist, Brittanni Young, joins us to share her powerful insights on rejection, expectations, avoidance, and more. Follow Brittanni on her Twitter and Instagram accounts to stay up to date with her work. To learn more about the Sex Down South Conference held in Atlanta, GA, check out their website for past guests and workshop information. And follow their Twitter and Instagram! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How To Manage Rejection 00:00:05 - 00:05:06 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. Hey hey and welcome. This is jess all my lonesome. Because i am down at sex down south in atlanta. And if you're not familiar with sex down south it is the sexuality conference to attend. It's run by my friends. Marlene stewart and the lovely tm. Marie and it is a life changing conference for so many of us in terms of its capacity to build a really special community to make connections to make space to hold space to even galvanize movements and honestly so much more. I was learned so much. Not only in the sessions and keynotes but also just in the conversations in the hallways and the after hours dance parties and i just really highly recommend it for anyone who has any interest in sex. It is is really just a must attend if you're working in the field or thinking about it and i really believe it's just as meaningful if you're not and of course. It costs money to attend conferences. But they do have scholarships available for those in need. And i'm also happy to support with some additional scholarships if you're someone who has financial barriers and you do want to attend in the future so start by following along to see what sex down south is about and see what they're doing next. It is on instagram. They are s. d. s. con like sex down south conso. Sds khan and it's sex down south everywhere else. And yeah i just really wanna thank sex for bringing me back welcoming me back kind of i just feel like they very quickly welcomed me into the fold and a had a lot of my. I hear one thing i think about is my first crying in public strangers. Because i was just honestly so moved i think by the feeling of being cared for and feeling safe and even fitting in which is A little bit hard for me. So i really hope to be coming back every year. Because it's just. I don't know such a special place so do check them out. And now we're gonna talk about a topic that super important topic that they are covering at the conference today. We are talking about rejection. Would it is what it feels like some of the evolutionary holdovers how to handle it how to respond how to even lean into rejection and practice being rejected and really how to learn from it and this is such an important life skill. I'm just. I'm so glad we're talking about it because i personally. I know i have so much to learn here joining me. Now is britney young couples and intimacy therapist. Is that how you describe yourself. i'd say so. It covers the basis. All right and so. You see primarily couples. Do you also see individuals or triads or anything like that.

Feeling tense or distracted? Looking to feel more connected to your body and/or more present in the current moment? Carve out a few minutes to reset with our guided body scan from our Mindful Sex course. The Body Scan: A Mindful Practice for Pleasure & Presence Thank you for engaging with our work and for tuning into our podcast. We appreciate you. If you’re shopping for intimacy tools or toys, feel free to browse our affiliate links, and use code DRJESSVIP to save at checkout. Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! How a Simple Body Scan Can Shift Your Mood, Mindset & Pleasure Potential Feeling tense, distracted, or disconnected from your body? You’re not alone. Whether you’re responding to the daily grind, grappling with stress-induced irritability, or simply feeling off-centre, your nervous system might be asking for a reset. In this episode, I (Dr. Jess) flew solo to offer a practice from our Mindful Sex course—a guided body scan designed to help you slow down, breathe more deeply, and root yourself in your physical sensations. The benefits aren’t limited to the bedroom (though that’s a lovely bonus). Grounding practices like the body scan can enhance everyday emotional regulation, increase body confidence, and support more intentional intimacy—solo or partnered. This practice is simple, accessible and doesn’t require any fancy gear (though if you’re in the mood to pair presence with physical pleasure, we’ve got you covered below). What Is the Body Scan? At its core, a body scan is a mindfulness practice that invites you to gently observe your bodily sensations from head to toe (or feet to head, depending on your vibe). You don’t have to change or fix anything. You’re simply tuning in, noticing, and making space for whatever comes up—tension, ease, warmth, stillness, even numbness. And yes, this too can be erotic. As you become more familiar with how your body feels, you can become more attuned to how you want it to feel. When Life Gets Loud, Slow Down As I shared on the podcast, my tolerance for stress has felt especially low lately. I’ve been snapping at things that usually wouldn’t phase me (looking at you, closet door). My routine has been a bit chaotic, and I haven’t been doing the things I know help me feel grounded—like movement, mindful practices, and time offline. So instead of berating myself, I’ve been trying to return to basics. One of those basics is this body scan, which focuses on breath and bodily sensation in a calming, accessible way. If you need a quick pause to breathe, feel, and re-centre, this one’s for you. Your Guided Body Scan In under ten minutes, this guided exercise will help you: Breathe with more awareness  Tune into tension and ease without judgment  Gently increase body awareness  Begin (or continue) your journey toward sensual, mindful connection  You’ll explore physical sensations from your feet up to your jaw, without needing to “do” anything. There’s no goal other than to notice and be present. And yes, this presence can spill into more pleasurable, connected sex—but it starts with your own breath. Expand Your Practice with the Mindful Sex Course If you find the body scan grounding, you might love our full Mindful Sex course. It includes over 20 video/audio guides and dozens of strategies to help you slow down, communicate with confidence, and savour every last touch. The goal? To help you feel more present, more connected to your body, and more attuned to pleasure—however you define it.

Board-certified gynecologic surgeon and author of This Is How You Vagina, Dr. Nicole Williams joins us to share her knowledge and wisdom on the following questions and more. What makes discharge normal? How can you tell if something is awry? What myths hold us back from loving our vaginas? Why might your vulva be itchy? How do fibroids affect sex and pleasure? Follow Dr. Nicole on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and The Gynecology Institute of Chicago website. And don’t forget to check out our awesome video course, Mind Blowing Oral: Clitoral Edition. Use discount code PODCAST for 25% off! And if you love a penis, you can use the same code to save on the Penis Pleasure version as well. If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Happy Vaginas, Fibroids & Discharge 00:00:05 - 00:05:04 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice. You can use tonight. Welcome to the second doctor. just podcast. i'm your co host brandon. Where here with my lovely other. Half dr jess hey. I'm ready to talk vaginas. Are you ready to talk vaginas. I'm ready to talk vaginas and learn about vaginas. Did you learn about vaginas. Growing up. In what i learned in school. Which which probably everyone learned that was about it. Okay what did you learn in school. Specifically about vaginas. What did you learn. I can't remember what. I just remember basic sexual anatomy so what it was what its purpose was and we definitely didn't learn about any pleasure. Okay so what did they teach. You was the purpose. Well there was babies. Which i know not in the vagina per se and then obviously other anatomical functioning. I mean if you had you know that you re thrown going p but that was a bit okay so they actually taught you that there was a separate whole to piazza. Yes i recall that. Yep because we didn't. I don't think i learned that. Like i think i kind of for longtime thought the vagina and the youth for with the same interesting. No i do remember it being separate. Because i remember you learning about the you. Re threat for penises as well okay. So let's talk names. did you have like. What did your parents call the penis. I only remember it being called the penis. I can't remember if i was a kid if it was called something else when i was a little little kid i mean maybe my pb or something like that. But i never. It was never called anything else and did your parents use the word penis freely. Like i can't picture your dad's saying penis. I definitely wouldn't say that it was used freely but when we had to address it if there was something it was what it was. Which was the penis. Okay okay. now i'm thinking about my childhood. My parents call. I guess the vagina the pongy. So pongy i. I don't know if it's from the jamaican side. It could be the chinese side. Or probably some combo of chinese jamaican it was always called the pongy And i can't for the life of me. Remember when i learned that it was actually called vagina or vulva volvo. I learned when i was in. I think university. But i did have a book called. Where do i come from. Which was this cartoon illustrated book out how babies are made so pongy was the word. I'm wondering if anybody else's parents called it the pongy like i'm saying oh maybe it was for my jamaican side. Maybe it was chinese jamaican.

Are you holding onto resentments? Is resentment holding you back from being present and full of joy? Do you have difficulty expressing how you feel or do you feel confined to specific roles? Tune into this conversation with psychotherapist Roxanne Francis as she guides us through: How resentment builds How to let go of resentment in relationships How resentment is tied to avoidance and vulnerability Techniques to move through the process of managing resentment — from both sides Ways to process emotions constructively Keep up to date with the registered social worker and psychotherapist Roxanne Francis through her website or on her Instagram and Twitter accounts. This episode is brought to you by AdamAndEve.com — use code DRJESS to save 50% on almost any item + get free shipping and some extra free gifts too! If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How To Let Go Of Resentment 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight. We'll come to the doctor jazz. Podcast i don't know i'm singing. You just wanted to change it up a little. Yes are you taking requests. Absolutely not but i am going to throw a karaoke party wants to do it. What i am in iraq out kariuki is the last thing to come back because of all of the screaming into the night. There is no singing. It is just screaming and spitting everywhere. I would like to hear return of the mack. I'm a throw some d's on it is what i'm gonna do okay. Fine fine today. We're not talking karaoke. We are talking resentment We're gonna talk about what it is how to let go of it. And we're about to joined by the roxanne francis an award-winning registered social worker and psychotherapist at consultant and speaker. She has been working with companies and people all over the world to achieve their mental health goals for over a decade. She is the owner of francis psychotherapy and consulting services where she provides psychotherapy to individuals in the community. She also does clinical supervision for other therapists and does a whole bunch of consultation with organisations around mental health in the workplace around diversity equity and inclusion around burnout who a lot of us are feeling that right. Now around children's mental health around parenting. She's also a media mental health expert. Which is how. I got to know her. And you'll see her on newscasts and print and online publications. Pretty much everywhere. How did she find time for this podcast so busy i know. I just forced my way in their into her. I g fox in joins us. I want to send a huge shout out to our sponsors adam and eve who have yet extended their promo for fifty percents off almost any item plus free shipping and a whole series of free surprise gifts with code dr jeff so be sure to check them out at adam and eve dot com. I was actually online shopping. And i noticed a bunch of their lingerie and hot fetish wear is on sale right now so i have my eye on something called the scandal. Full length bodysuits or brennan. You should actually go check it out. I know you're none of them in my size. Probably that would be amazing. Look great at it. I mean. I know you're not a shopper. By the talking about for me you know the last time you bought me closed remember.

This week, we flip the scripts and our intern, Maggie Lee, interviews Jess about her journey into the field of sexuality. They talk education, equity, the business of sex and Jess shares her insights for the next generation of sexuality professionals. Womanizer and We-Vibe is having a sale! Use code DRJESS to save a few extra from products such as the Starlet to the Wish. And do check out the latest book by Jess and Marla Stewart, "The Ultimate Guide to Seduction & Foreplay," right here. If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. EPISODE 1 Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. This week, we’re doing something a little different. Our lovely intern Maggie, who is studying Sexuality at Concordia University, is doing a series of interviews on working in the field of sexuality and I was her first interviewee, so we’re going to share that conversation with you. Before we dive into that, I want to shout out the Womanizer & We-Vibe sales. We-vibe has my favourite toy, The Touch on sale as well as a number of others like the Wish, and the Tango at We-Vibe.com and Womanizer also has a few products on sale including the Starlet, which is under $50 at Womanizer.com - please use code DRJESS to save a few extra $ and to let them know that you heard about them here. I told you last week about all the positive feedback I’ve been receiving regarding the Womanizer Starlet from online messages to people stopping me in the airport, so do check it out at Womanizer.com Alright, without further ado, let’s get to our interview. In this conversation, I talk about my personal journey into the sexuality field, the challenges, the rewards, how I carved my path, what I’ve learned and what I foresee for the future. Check it out. Here’s Maggie taking over the mic... Maggie: The first person I'm going to be interviewing is Dr. Jessica O'Reilly, otherwise known as Dr. Jess. She's a sexpert, a media personality, the host of the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, she’s an author and educator, amongst other things. So Hi, Dr. Jess, thanks for chatting with me today. How are you? Dr. Jess: Great. Thanks for having me, happy to be chatting. Maggie: Happy to have you. So because we're talking about careers, I'm going to start with, what is it that you actually do for a living? Could you please describe your professional work in the sexuality field? Dr. Jess: Absolutely. So I'm a speaker and an educator. So I work with groups, primarily adults, and primarily couples, who want to work on their relationships, want to enhance their sex lives, want to improve their communication skills, their intimacy, their connection. And my work really entails traveling to host a range of different workshops. So I'm not really seeing people one on one, it's all group work. Sometimes it's what we call a brief intervention, or I guess they're all fairly brief interventions for hours, maybe a couple of days, and we work through the group process. So that's what the bulk of my work entails. And then I support that work, and I suppose promote that work via the media side. So I host a television show. I have, of course my podcast, the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast, I write for publications, and I contribute to mainstream media publications on a daily basis. Maggie: That's so interesting. Thank you for that.

  How do you cultivate deeper connections through communication? How can you summon compassion in the heat of conflict? How do you define non-violent communication? What is polyvagal theory? Sander T. Jones joins Jess and Brandon to explore these questions and share additional concepts from their book, Cultivating Connection: A Practical Guide for Personal and Relationship Growth in ethical non-monogamy.  Sander is a licensed clinical social worker, certified hypnotherapist, and author in Atlanta, Georgia with over a decade of experience working with people in ethically non-monogamous relationships, people in the kink/BDSM/Leather communities, LGBTQ+ communities, and people doing voluntary sex work. As a relationship therapist they have taught hundreds of people the steps and principles for repairing relationship bonds and then deepening those bonds through collaborative communication, respecting the rights and autonomy of themselves and their partners, being aware of interpersonal power, and avoiding the abuse of that power when it arises in our relationships. You can contact Sander at SanderTJones.com and following on Facebook and Instagram.   Save with code PODCAST on the Mindful Sex Course on the Happier Couples website. And if you have podcast questions, please submit them here. You can find the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. A Guide to Compassionate Communication Episode 334 [00:00:00] You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice. You can use tonight [00:00:15] Jess O'Reilly: here in Atlanta at sex down south. And the reason you know, we're at six down south is that I have no voice left. [00:00:21] Brandon Ware: I was going to say, you got your sexy voice going on. [00:00:23] Jess O'Reilly: Oh my dear God. And it's not from being in the dungeon. [00:00:25] Jess O'Reilly: It's not from doing anything fun. I think it's just from dry air. [00:00:28] Brandon Ware: You should have said it was something fun. [00:00:29] Jess O'Reilly: I know. I know. I wish it was something more fun, but we are having a great time. And if you've ever listened before and heard me talk about Sex Town South, I think it's the most brilliant sex conference. [00:00:39] Jess O'Reilly: It is my absolute favorite. Uh, I'm such a massive fan of Marla and Tia, the founders. Marla, of course, is the coauthor of our latest book. And, uh, among the brilliant minds who are presenting here in Atlanta, we have with us right now, Sander T. Jones, a licensed clinical social worker, certified hypnotherapist. [00:00:55] Jess O'Reilly: Ooh, I want to ask you about that. author. Uh, you're located in Atlanta. You have over a decade of experience and you've recently released Cultivating Connection, a practical guide for personal and relationship growth in ethical non monogamy. Thank you for chatting with us. [00:01:08] Sander T. Jones: Thank you so much for having me. [00:01:10] Sander T. Jones: It's really an honor to be on your show. [00:01:11] Jess O'Reilly: Oh, well, we're, we're so appreciative. I'm excited to learn from you. I've looked over all of the wealth of info. in your latest book, Cultivating Connection. I think it's your first book, right? It is my first book. Yes. Congrats on that. Well, first and foremost, tell us about you. [00:01:24] Jess O'Reilly: Tell us a little bit about your background, professional, personal, anything you feel like sharing. [00:01:27] Sander T. Jones: Okay. Professional background.

This week we share our relationship check-in -- short(ish), sweet and unscripted. Most couples invest in the start-up phase of their relationships (e.g. the wedding and honeymoon) and then they set themselves on autopilot without formally discussing their feelings, desires, goals and needs — until something goes wrong. By scheduling weekly or monthly check-ins, you can reduce tension, improve understanding and nip issues in the bud before they erupt into bigger problems. Relationship check-ins do not need to follow a specific format. They can be semi-formal (e.g. a conversation with notes over brunch) or more casual (a text chain you update every afternoon). It’s up to you to decide what works for you knowing that the more you talk about your feelings, needs and concerns, the more likely you will be to meet one another’s expectations. You might start with these three simple prompts: How are you feeling right now? How are you feeling in this relationship? How can I support you at this moment in time? Or you can take a little more time to delve into some additional topics: 1. How are you feeling today? This is your opportunity to let your partner know where you’re at emotionally. This can help set the tone for the meeting, so be honest so that your partner understands how you’re feeling and responds with support. 2. How are you feeling about our relationship? This is also an important question to ask yourself. Consciously consider how you feel about the relationship so that you can make changes and requests as needed. With kids, work and other commitments, we don’t have the time to resolve every conflict, discuss every moment of discomfort or talk about every concern. 3. Is there anything on your mind that is bothering, worrying or stressing you out? Because you have your own life outside of the relationship, your partner may not know what’s going on with your work, business and friendships. 4. Is there anything you’re working on that you’d like to discuss? This question might relate to health or fitness goals, something your therapist suggested you work on or a desired mindset. 5. What is on the horizon for the next week/month? This is an opportunity to ensure you’re both on the same page. You might discuss schedules, workloads or family responsibilities. Planning ahead is essential to happy, harmonious relationships. 6. What can I do to support you? The previous questions focus on how you’re feeling, and this one allows you to shift the focus to your partner. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and be as specific as possible when making requests. 7. How are you feeling about our sex life? Most people don’t talk about sex until something is wrong, but couples who make sex talk a habit have more frequent and satisfying sex. When they run into sexual challenges (e.g., lack of desire or a decline in frequency), they’re equipped to work through the issue, as sexual communication is the norm, not an exception that becomes associated with problems. If this broad question feels too daunting, consider an alternative: What did you like about the last time we had sex? And we can't forget about our sponsors, save 50% off almost any item in the store at Adam & Eve. PLUS free shipping PLUS a bunch of little free gifts this week use code DRJESS. Or check out Womanizer and We-Vibe with code DRJESS to save a little more on their products! Pre-Register for the Couples Master Class: 50 Exercises For Successful Relationships. The course designed to increase passion, boost communication, heighten intimacy and spark eroticism within your relationship. Get 50% off this course when you pre-register! If you’ve got questions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean,

Letting Go of Shame & Embracing Pleasure In this episode of the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast, Dr. Jess and Brandon explore your questions on ruined orgasms, sleep climaxes, vaginal taste, and even the topic of tasting your own ejaculate. Thank you so much for listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast and engaging with our content! Your clicks and support help us keep this free content flowing, and when you shop with our affiliate partners you’re supporting our work. Thank you (for real)!   Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! What is a Ruined Orgasm? A ruined orgasm isn’t necessarily a failed orgasm. It’s a deliberate (or sometimes accidental) disruption to your climax. It may occur inadvertently due to distractions or intrusive thoughts. Alternatively, it may be an intentional part of BDSM or dominant/submissive dynamics. In this context, stimulation is often stopped just before orgasm, resulting in physical release without the typical wave of pleasure. Ruined vs. Forced vs. Edging Here’s how they differ: Ruined orgasms: Climax is interrupted or diminished, often intentionally. Forced orgasms: Repeated or continuous stimulation, often without rest. Edging: Building to orgasm and stopping intentionally to enhance climax later. If ruined orgasms have piqued your interest and you want to dig deeper into orgasm control, check out our detailed post on ruined orgasms: techniques, psychology, and benefits. Sleep Orgasms Are Real — And Yes, They Can Feel That Good Wet dreams aren’t reserved for teen boys. People of all genders can experience sleep orgasms, also known as nocturnal orgasms. These may be spontaneous or linked to dreams. Theories suggest they are tied to the body’s ability to relax and let go of inhibitions while asleep. Although more commonly reported by cis men, people of all genders may experience them but might be less likely to notice. We often eroticize emotional sensations like shame or embarrassment because the dominant culture denies us the right to feel them without stigma. Translation? You might dream your way to orgasm because your brain finally gets to let go. What About Taste? Diet, Vaginas & Ejaculate Let’s get to the juicy stuff: taste. There is no definitive research that links specific foods to vaginal taste. However, anecdotal evidence suggests that fruits and vegetables may contribute to a sweeter taste, while coffee, cigarettes, and asparagus might lead to a more bitter profile. A healthy diet can support overall vaginal health, but individual differences apply. And yes, you can taste yourself. If you're curious — explore. Shame-free. People with penises and vulvas can both benefit from dropping the taboo. As Brandon shares in the episode, “I think growing up... there was shame around masturbating and coming... the idea of tasting your own cum just seemed weird." Toys to Explore Orgasm Control & Solo Tasting Want to explore orgasm control solo or with a partner? Try a toy with precise pressure and targeted stimulation. The We-Vibe Touch is one of Dr. Jess’s faves — ideal for edging and building up arousal. If you're curious about playing with climax, try the We-Vibe Melt, a couples’ toy that lets you pause, tease, and build waves of intensity together. And if you’re on a taste adventure, the Mini Wand makes solo exploration simple, playful, and portable. Code DRJESSVIP We-Vibe Melt Discount Code - DRJESSVIP

Thank you for being here and exploring with us. If you’re looking to treat yourself (or your partner) along the way, check out our affiliate links and save with our discount code DRJESSVIP at checkout. We appreciate your support! Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! Penis Size, Pleasure & Confidence: Let’s Talk About It Does size matter?? I receive so many messages and they often open with questions that dive straight into penis size, frequency of masturbation, and a plea for reassurance. And my response is almost always the same: You’re fine. You’re more than fine. We live in a world obsessed with comparison and false benchmarks. Penis size is one of those cultural yardsticks, and for many, it’s a source of unnecessary shame and silence. But let’s be clear: Bigger is not better. Better is better. And better is about connection, pleasure, presence, and feeling good in your own body. Brandon and I sat down to talk about the social pressure around penis size, locker room awkwardness, middle school posturing, and the assumption that bigger automatically means better in bed. Spoiler: It doesn’t. The Social Side of Penis Size: It’s Not About Sex Let’s talk about locker room syndrome. There’s real research, like the multi-country study by Annabel Chan, that shows most people with penises aren’t concerned about size in the bedroom. They’re worried about what other people (especially other men) think outside of it. Penis size has become a bizarre social status marker and a way to signal masculinity, not necessarily to enhance sex. And the data backs this up: while over 85% of women say they’re happy with their partner’s penis size, only 55% of men say the same about themselves. That gap isn’t based on pleasure, it’s based on social messaging. Positions, Pleasure & Personal Preference If you’re wondering whether you need to adjust your sexual positions based on penis size, the answer is: not really. There’s no universal rulebook. For some, shallower penetration can be more pleasurable. Reverse ride, lap dance grind, vibrating penis rings, these can all enhance sensation regardless of size. If you’re worried about going “too deep” and hitting the cervix in uncomfortable ways, look into options like a penis bumper, a stackable buffer that allows for full thrusting with a shallower feel. Pleasure doesn’t come down to length, it comes down to care, communication, and creative curiosity. Penis Anxiety Is Real, But It’s Not Inevitable One listener messaged to say he was afraid to reenter the dating world after a breakup, not because of emotional baggage, but because of his penis size (about 4.8 to 5.3 inches erect, well within the “average” range). His ex affirmed and adored him, but the broader cultural messages were undermining his confidence. If this sounds like you, know that you’re not alone. Penis insecurity is common and culturally reinforced. But you deserve confidence and pleasure without having to compensate, perform, or apologize for your body. Condom Fit: Where Size Actually DoesMatter While penis size doesn’t dictate your worth or your pleasure potential, it does matter when it comes to condom fit. Milla Impola is the Director of Marketing at ONE® Condoms, a brand of premium condoms and lubricants. ONE® is passionate about sexual health education and innovation. ONE® also launched the myONE® brand of 60 condom sizes. Knowing proper condom fit is key for pleasure and confidence in your condom, myONE helps resolve issues such as condom slippage, squeezing,

Urologist, Dr. Denise Asafu-Ajei, joins us to answer your questions about erections: How can you prevent erectile dysfunction? How do you treat erectile issues? How do you know if erectile issues are psychological or physiological in nature? What can you do if you lose your erection? How do you manage anxiety to reduce negative feedback loops? Dr. Denise Asafu-Adjei is a urologist with subspecialty training in sexual dysfunction and male infertility. She completed a Fellowship in Andrology at University of California Los Angeles (UCLA). She will be joining the Urology Department at Loyola University in Chicago as the Medical Director of Male Reproductive Medicine. She completed her Urology residency at Columbia University Irving Medical Center and received her M.D. from the University of Michigan Medical School. She obtained an MPH in Health Policy and Management from the Harvard School of Public Health and a Bachelor of Science from Carnegie Mellon University. In the future, she aims to utilize clinical research and physician leadership to help healthcare systems achieve access to equitable and high quality healthcare for sexual dysfunction and male reproductive services. Follow Dr. Denise's Instagram and Twitter. Be sure to check out our sponsor, Lovehoney, as they’re having a big sale this week and you can save a little extra with code DRJESS10 If you want to enter our contest to win the awesome We-Vibe Touch, be sure to leave us a review on any of the podcast sites and then email us at info@sexwithdrjess.com so we can be sure to enter your name in the draw. We’ll choose (and notify) the winner August 2nd and announce on the podcast on August 6th. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Better Boners: Erection Facts, Fiction & Advice 00:00:05 - 00:05:01 You're listening to the sax with dr jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr jazz. Podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half doctor jess how you doing. I'm great today. we are. we're talking boehner's love me again boehner. Sometimes i love a good. Sometimes i can live without it. Yeah we're talking directions and we're going to be answering a listener question. That is a little bit similar to last week's but from this side of the person with the penis and of course there's no one better to weigh in on erections than our guest today. Urologist dr denise software agyei the incoming director of male reproductive medicine at loyola university in chicago Her resumes too impressive. She went from carnegie mellon to the university of michigan to harvard. To columbia to ucla. And she's going to help us. Better understand erections erectile dysfunction and discuss some preventative measures since erections tend to subside with age. And of course. You don't need a raging like joke about taking it or leaving it but the reality is there are so many ways to enjoy pleasure insects without a boehner as well i agree and i. I couldn't agree more that that c. I mean there's no one better to talk about this. Dr tennessee absolutely. I mean we won't say boehner doctor because it's much much more than that. Her specialties are run. Quite deep including male fertility so really looking forward to that conversation an...

This podcast is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app for couples and singles where they're a pioneer in allowing couples to explore dating together as a pair. Feeld is for everyone from the experienced to the curious. Jess & Brandon answer listener questions related to erection loss, anxiety, libido, social norms and how to start difficult conversations. This episode is brought to you by Lovehoney. They’re having a summer sale and you can save a little extra with code DRJESS10! Here is a sampling of the questions we address: #1. My partner is able to get and retain a really bangin' erection and can reliably orgasm during any type of penile stimulation (hand jobs, oral, even just putting lube on my body and rubbing himself back and forth on me), but he quickly and consistently loses his erection during penetration. The only time he is able to maintain an erection during PIV sex is in roleplay situations where I'm pretending to be someone other than myself. Logically I know this issue isn't caused by anything I'm doing or not doing. We also have an amazing relationship and a strong emotional connection. But as this continues to happen it's starting to erode my self esteem--a nagging voice tells me that he's bored of having sex with me and doesn't want to make the effort unless I jump through hoops to make it extra exciting for him. I'm wondering what exactly is really going on here, how I can bring this up to him without making him feel like there's something wrong with him, (I don't want to make the problem worse by adding extra anxiety to him), and what we can do to help him maintain his erection during PIV sex. #2. Hi Dr.Jess, I’ve been listening to your podcast for a couple months now and I have a question dating focused: do you think leagues are a thing? Like when someone says “they’re out of their league” or “dating or marrying up” or “you’re a 5 and they’re a 10”. Although sometimes this refers to socioeconomic divides in terms of education, income rather than just physical attractiveness alone. But I wanted to know your thoughts on how you think these divides can be overcome as I hear this enough or have seen it sometimes get in the way of my friends’ relationship. #3. Firstly thank you for all you do. Your podcast is a huge source of comfort, inspiration and knowledge for me and I am excited every Friday to listen! I'm 27, my boyfriend is 26. We've been together for 7 months. He recently told me that he fantasizes about being dominated. Other than the occasional light choke or spank, I have not taken on that role before. I tend to prefer to be dominated, too, so while I'm happy to try it out, I am unsure how to begin and how to feel confident doing so. Separately, we are working on our communication in sex but I still struggle with initiating sex and talking about it for fear of rejection or being humiliated. I've been feeling like I want sex more than him but, because I don't know how to start it, I end up waiting for him to be in the mood. I end up feeling unattractive, like I'm unable to seduce my boyfriend. Even though logically I know that he sometimes might just be tired or not in the mood, and that's OK. Last week, after months of my internal agonizing, he brought up the subject and asked how I would describe my libido. He told me his was "changeable" and that sometimes he can tell I'm trying to make it happen but he just doesn't feel like it. He suggested I try telling him that I want him and that can sometimes get him in the mood, too. I now feel pressure to assert myself in a way I feel uncomfortable doing. I feel very vulnerable stating that I want sex, especially since I know that if he wanted it he would have initiated it already! I told him once that I felt the patriarchy made me less sexually assertive, because woman are taught to be passive, and he told me to stop blaming my problems on external factors. Any advice on both of these topics would be VERY much appreciated!

Most people fantasize about threesomes, but not many people actually dive in. In part I of our Threesomes podcast, we dive into the data and get some practical advice from Justin Lehmiller who answers your questions including: How common are threesomes? What counts as a threesome? How does a threesome affect relationships for couples? Who is having threesomes? How do people find threesomes (e.g. through apps like Feeld)? What’s the appeal of threesomes? Next week, we’ll dive into how to prep for a threesome with prompts, conversations and more! Justin Lehmiller the Scientific Advisor to Feeld, and host of the Sex and Psychology Blog and Podcast. To stay up to date with The Kinsey Institute research fellow, follow his Instagram and Twitter! Feeld is the first dating app for couples and singles. They're a pioneer in allowing couples to explore dating together as a pair -- from ethical non-monogamy to alternative relationships and everything in between. Feeld is for everyone from the experienced to the curious. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 220: Threesomes: Who, What, Why & How?  (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:15): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:22): Hey, hey. We are talking threesomes today. And it fits that today's episode is brought to you by Feeld. And Feeld is the first dating app for couples and singles, they’re a pioneer in allowing couples to kind of explore dating together as a pair. And they're open to all genders, all sexual identities, all sexual orientations, basically for anyone who's interested in either ethical non monogamy or alternative relationships structures, or simply those who are curious and looking to kind of dip their toe into the pond so do check them out. And you can download the Feeld app, it’s free, and you create a profile and once you have liked someone and they've liked you back on the app, you become connections and you're able to chat. And if you want to you can share photos and they also often offer an upgraded membership option with extra features and yeah, so do check out Feeld. They're one of the largest online communities for fun stuff like this. And it's interesting, I actually came across Feeld in my research a few years ago, when I was prepping a training for therapists on threesomes and ethical non monogamy. And they really are the perfect partner for this podcast, because we're talking about threesomes. And of course there are people on Feeld looking for threesomes. And later, we’re going to be talking with their expert Dr Justin Lehmiller, but before he joins us, I wanted to kind of dig into some of the data on threesomes. And later on, I also wanna talk if we have time about how to prepare for a three some, like in terms of communication and reflection and just topics to address before you start exploring. I don't know how much time we'll have. I might have to split it into a couple episodes, but we will get there. It's interesting because when you think about threesomes, don't you think porn has kind of made threesomes seem like the norm? Everybody’s doing them.

Sydney Rae Chin joins us to share her personal experience as a closeted queer woman who grew up Chinese-American-Catholic. She shares some really valuable advice on how to navigate emotional consent and leaves us with tools for navigating boundaries and honouring our own values. They dive deep into conversation around polyamory, monogamy, and coming out to their family answering these questions and more! Can you have monogamous relationships as a polyamorous person? Can polyamory & monogamy co-exist in a relationship? How do you cultivate emotional consent and communicate emotional boundaries? How do you come out to family — as polyamorous or queer? How do culture and gender intersect with experiences of polyamory? To stay up to date with Sydney, check out her website and follow her on Instagram. Our wonderful partner Adam & Eve has extended their promo. Use code DRJESS to get 50% off almost any item including shipping PLUS a bunch of free goodies. Take this opportunity to save and try something new tonight! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 219: Polyamory, Coming Out & Emotional Consent  (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:17): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half, Dr Jess, who is currently squeezing my nipple. Dr. Jess (00:26): I just wanted to see if he could keep going, and he did. Brandon (00:28): I did, I threw you a curve ball by telling everybody what you were doing at the beginning. Dr. Jess (00:34): How you doing today babe? Brandon (00:36): I'm great my nipples little sore. But otherwise I'm great. Thanks for asking, how are you? Dr. Jess (00:41): I’m good. I feel like your nipples have played a prominent role in the podcast the last few weeks. Because you were talking about I don't know, pinching nipples on my instagram and people were having a good time with that. I think my family unfollowed us, but we're okay with that. And I don't know, I feel like things are going really well right now because life is getting back to normal here in Canada. They're opening up some restrictions. Or I guess they're loosening the restrictions around travel. We are fully vaccinated, you and me. I got a pinch in my vaccination. The pharmacist pinched my arm and said “I like to pinch,” then she pinched my arm and then she gave me the jab. And I'm unclear as to whether or not she liked to pinch for the sake of the vaccine or she just generally liked to pinch and took the opportunity to pinch me, but either way I'm happy because I'm vaxxed. Brandon (01:29): Got my jabs in, and it feels so good. Dr. Jess (01:34): Anyhow, lots going on, just wanted to mention that my new show on CityTV presented by TSC is still running Friday nights here in Canada at midnight on CityTV. And it's called Intimately You With Dr. Jess and we’re already, I don't know almost two thirds through the season. We're at least halfway through season one and it's going pretty cool. I think it's so much fun to get to hawk sex toys on national TV. And I've got honestly, we have the coolest guest tonight. We're joined by Shanae Adams,

Are you comfortable talking dirty? Do you feel silly trying new lines, approaches and scenarios? You’re not alone. Jess and Brandon share their struggles (while sharing a few laughs) and offer guidance & strategies for all types of dirty talk from sweet and romantic to naughty and kinky. They try out dozens of lines that you can practice on your own and share with a partner (or two!). Want to learn more about dirty talk? Check out The Ultimate Guide to Seduction and Foreplay co-authored by Marla Renee Stewart. And check out  IOBAToys.com for the OhMyC, a silent clitoral massager that fits in the palm of your hand. Use code DRJESS to save 30% off! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 218: Master Dirty Talk: 60+ Tips & Examples (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:16): Welcome to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:23): Hey, hey. Brandon (00:24): How are you? Dr. Jess (00:25): I'm fine. I want you to talk dirty to me. Brandon (00:28): I want you. I want you right now. You smiling and laughing at me doesn't help with the confidence here. Dr. Jess (00:36): I’m not laughing, I was just smiling at you. What do you think I want to hear in bed when I say talk dirty? Brandon (00:43): I think you want to hear that I want you that, I can't stop thinking about you. Dr. Jess (00:49): You never say that. If you know I want to hear that Brandon (00:51): I know it, it doesn't mean it’s what I say. Dr. Jess (00:54): So why don't you say that? Brandon (00:55): Because I feel stupid. Talking dirty, I feel dumb. Dr. Jess (01:01): Perfect setup for this episode. Brandon (01:03): Is it really? Dr. Jess (01:04): I think so, because we're going to be talking about dirty talk. And I think so many of us feel that way. But can I ask you something? In the heat of the moment, when you're like all riled up and you’re turned on and you know that I'm liking it and you're liking it, do you feel less silly? Brandon (01:17): No I still feel silly. Because I think, because I don't know what to say. Dr. Jess (01:21): But you do know what to say, because you just said it, in jest. Brandon (01:25): Yes but in the moment, it's like I'm drawing so many blanks. Dr. Jess (01:32): Well yeah anyhow. I was thinking that what I find is, that the more turned on I am, the less self conscious I am. If I'm in the heat of the moment, 'cause I don't worry about what's going on around me, I don't think about anybody else's needs. Brandon (01:47): But that's my problem. My problem is I'm constantly paying attention to everything that's happening around me. And I'm not immersed in the moment, even when I'm really into things. I'm still cognizant of how much noise is being made or you know just the environment and that really detracts from what's happening. Dr. Jess (02:07): So what do we do about that? I mean I know what we can do about that. What do you wanna do about that? Brandon (02:12): I look at it as my problem. I think I have to really get into the head space and also not care as much.

Dr. Lexx is a phenomenal sex therapist, educator, and media consultant. The #CouplesClinician runs The Institute for Sexuality and Intimacy, LLC and is an Amazon best-selling author! She’s the coolest nerd you'll ever meet and she’s passionate about helping clients build, maintain, and perpetuate true intimacy with #shamefreesexed. This week, Dr. Lexx joins us to talk about adipositivity & enmeshment in relationships. She shares insights on how to recognize enmeshed dynamics and strategies for managing enmeshment. Follow Dr. Lexx's Instagram and Twitter . To learn more about the MUSICARES event Dr. Lexx will be moderating next week on the 16th, check out the information on her website at LexxSexDoc.com. Our wonderful partner Adam & Eve has extended their promo. Use code DRJESS to get 50% off almost any item including shipping PLUS some free goodies. Take this opportunity to save and try something new tonight! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 217: Signs Of Enmeshment In Relationships (And what you can do about it) (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:17): Welcome, to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:24): Hey. We've been given away free vibes. So last week, we ran our first podcast contest, which is not as organized as it should have been. I learned my lesson. But we got a whole bunch of entries for these free vibrators from Romp Toys, and we've selected our winner. And I've got permission to share their name, so congratulations to Rebecca Bassett, who will be receiving in their mailbox a Romp Shine, which is one of those clitoral toys that fits around the head of the clit and uses pleasure air to create that fun suction/kissing/licking sensation. And Rebecca, you'll also be getting the Romp Jazz, which is a rabbit vibe, also by Romp. And I I love their packaging, love their branding, really cool new brands. So I guess, keep an eye on your mailbox. We have more good vibes and giveaways to come. I'm going to do the next one. On IG because it's just a little organized, a little bit easier for me to organize, so be sure to follow @sexwithdrjess on IG. And hey babe, should people follow your IG? Brandon (01:27): Ya, why not? @veritybrandonverity, come and see what I'm up to and what I'm commenting on. Dr. Jess (01:32): But it's not sex toys. Brandon (01:34): It is definitely not sex toys Dr. Jess (01:36): You can do a sex toy giveaway on yours if you want. Brandon (01:38): Sure. I'm sure that all my clients and friends would be wondering what I'm changing and doing, what I'm up to. Dr. Jess (01:45): All right so you'll give away sex toys on your channel and I'll give away a condo on mine. You donate the condo. I'll donate the sex toys. So of course if you are shopping for vibes, https://www.adamandeve.com has extended their promo for fifty percent off almost any item plus free shipping and some free goodies with code DRJESS so do checkout https://www.adamandeve.com. Well I want to dive right in because today, we’re going to be talking about enmeshment in relationships with a brilliant sex therapist.

On this week's podcast, Jess & Brandon discuss sexual compatibility and share their personal experiences while addressing these Qs: How do know know if you’re sexually compatible? What can you do if you’re not sexually compatible? What are the keys to sexual compatibility? What’s the difference between desire and identity? Should you break up if you’re not sexually compatible? How can you find middle ground if you’re not feeling compatible? Jess & Brandon weigh in on these questions and much more! Plus we’ve got a sex toy give-away from Romp Toys, so be sure to tune in! And don't forget to check out our amazing sponsor Adam & Eve. They are offering 50% off almost any item including shipping with code DRJESS. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How Much Does Sexual Compatibility Matter? (00:05): You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:18): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast, I'm your co-host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half Dr. Jess. Jess (00:25): Hey. Brandon (00:26): How are you? Jess (00:27): I’m good. It's been a bit of a heavy week. We keep having heavy weeks don't we? Brandon (00:31): Seems to be the trend. Jess (00:33): Yeah, with the news, with some stuff going on in life. And yeah, I'm actually excited to be having this conversation, because it's just you and me. And I feel like it could be an opportunity to decompress a little where nobody else interrupts. No producers, no nobody today. And we're going to be talking about sexual compatibility, which I don't think we always use the word sexual compatibility but it is a huge issue that comes up in all of the messages I receive from people. Brandon (00:59): Don’t you think the people often reach out to you with sex problems and is it always a sex problem or is it a compatibility problem? Jess (01:08): I mean a lot of it does go down to compatibility, or I see it actually more as expectations when people reach out. Cause they're you know, upset that their partner won't do something or disappointed that their not on the same page, or frustrated that they're not having sex at all. I do think a lot of it has to do with expectations and boundaries, and the fact that honestly folks wait months and years and years and years and years and years before they reach out. And you know, now that I'm so far into this field right? It feels like I just started. But it's been over a decade of doing this full-time, actually it's been longer than a decade. It gets a little frustrating. Because you do want to help people, and also I don't wanna say people are too far gone, but one conversation or a series of conversations or one workshop or one book oftentimes can't resolve this pent up resentment and frustration and shame and hurt that has built up really. It’s over a decade in some cases. So yeah I mean with compatibility, it's really interesting, because people will often reach out and say “oh Dr. Jess, I tried this, I did what you said, I bought them this, I presented them your Ted talk ‘monogamish.’ And they're just not into it, like what do I do?” And the bottom line is if they're not into it they're not into it right? You're not,

How Lifestyle Couples Keep Their Relationships Hot, Happy, and Connected Couples in The Lifestyle — often referred to as swingers — practice a form of ethical non-monogamy that usually involves consensual sexual play with other singles and/or couples. Though swinging still gets its fair share of judgment, research and lived experience show that many couples find that it strengthens their emotional connection, deepens their communication skills, and supports ongoing erotic exploration. In this quickie episode of the Sex with Dr. Jess Podcast, Jess and Brandon dive into advice from three experienced Lifestyle couples who generously share their insights on how they keep their relationships strong — and their sex lives sizzling. Curious about The Lifestyle? If you’ve ever been curious about the Lifestyle — or if you’re just looking to bring some of that open, playful energy into your own monogamous relationship — their wisdom applies. Some of the themes we explore include: • Why clear communication is the real aphrodisiac. • How setting — and revisiting — boundaries creates more freedom, not less. • What “success” looks like beyond just sex — think trust, self-awareness, and mutual growth. • How embracing pleasure (without shame) fuels deeper connection. Whether you’re Lifestyle-curious, monogamish, or simply committed to keeping your relationship vibrant, there’s something to learn from couples who choose intentional, consensual exploration. Listen now to hear real-world advice from couples who know that passion doesn’t have to fade — if you’re willing to keep learning, laughing, and, yes, talking about everything. Fuel your connection with a little extra pleasure — explore my go-to toys from Lovehoney. Be sure to use discount code DRJESSVIP to save (and Thank You! We appreciate your support). If you have podcast questions, please submit them here. Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. 3 Sex & Relationship Lessons From "Lifestyle" Couples Episode 333 [00:00:00] You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice. You can use tonight. [00:00:15] Brandon Ware: Welcome to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Dr. Jess, how are you feeling today? [00:00:19] Jess O'Reilly: I'm feeling all right. I'm feeling good. Talk to me. Why is that? We have just disembarked the Desire Cruise, and I don't know if this was maybe number six for us in terms of Desire Cruising, but we just came off a week in Greece with one stop in Turkey. [00:00:33] Jess O'Reilly: It was a lot of fun, but it was pretty intense. [00:00:34] Brandon Ware: Yeah, it was intense. [00:00:36] Jess O'Reilly: Lots of socializing. [00:00:38] Brandon Ware: Yeah, that's an understatement. I always like to party. Oh my gosh. I can't keep up. I don't know. I gotta, I gotta tell you, I don't know how they do it. They're up at like seven in the morning and they party hard until like three in the morning. [00:00:49] Jess O'Reilly: Is that, is that their schedule? I don't know. I'm asleep long before [00:00:52] Brandon Ware: that. I'm, I'm, I'm impressed. [00:00:55] Jess O'Reilly: But it's super friendly crowd. Oh yeah. Like it's so much fun while you're on, but then, you know, when you come off of something that's so highly social, at least me. Oh, I feel like a total drop. I just need to be quiet for a bit. [00:01:07] Jess O'Reilly: Need some time to chill. Yes. Now we are also on route to Atlanta for Sex Town South via Toronto. Very excited for this.

Thank you for listening to our podcast and for engaging with our content (for real). We’re thrilled you’re ready to learn more about your own butt. From Dr. Jess and Brandon, we appreciate you. Be sure to check out our affiliate links and use code DRJESSVIP at checkout to save when shopping!  Code DRJESSVIP THANK YOU! 💜 (for real) Code: DRJESSVIP-Save $ + Support Us! No pressure — but if you’re shopping, use our code DRJESSVIP for exclusive savings and a little support for us, too. Win-Win! LOVEHONEY.COM WE-VIBE.COM This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! Why Anal Play Deserves More Attention Anal sex isn’t just about taking it like a champ or dishing it out like a porn star. As Dr. Goldstein reminds us, it’s about care, curiosity and communication. Your anus is not just a portal to pleasure — it’s a muscular, complex structure that deserves respect. And yes, that means prepping for it with the same care you give to your glutes on leg day. Prep Is Pleasure: Before You Play Preparation isn’t about shame or sanitization. It’s about understanding your body. Dr. Goldstein reminds us that over-douching or using harsh enemas can damage your internal lining. His Future Method line is formulated to be pH-balanced and microbiome-safe. If you’re prepping for anal sex, think beyond the act itself: fibre intake, hydration, and relaxation techniques matter. Not everyone needs to douche. And if you’re unsure, try solo play in the shower to see how clean you really are. To get started, consider using an anal training kit, working slowly over six weeks, a few times a week. This is about progressive training — like weightlifting, but with lube and a more intimate reward. Know Your Butt: The 3 Sphincters & Anal Anatomy You’ve got three major muscle groups around the anus. Two are voluntary (you can clench those on demand), but the third — the internal sphincter — takes time and training to relax. That’s why some toys and techniques might not feel right at first. Dr. Goldstein suggests using motion, not just insertion. Don’t leave toys in place passively. Instead, use a gentle in-and-out motion to mimic the activity and help the muscles adapt. To help get to know these muscles, try a beginner-friendly toy like the We-Vibe Ditto — a smooth, small plug with vibration that encourages relaxation.  Code DRJESSVIP We-Vibe Ditto Discount code DRJESSVIP Beginner-Friendly: Slim, soft and easy to insert with 10 vibration modes. Remote + App Control: Great for partner or solo play. Dr. Jess says: A comfy, confidence-boosting intro to anal pleasure. Buy Butt Stuff at We-Vibe.com Buy Butt Stuff at Lovehoney.com This is an affiliate link. We may earn a commission. Thank you! Positions: Control, Communication & Pleasure Especially for first-timers, being in control helps. Dr. Goldstein recommends the receiving partner on top, face-to-face with their partner. This allows you to slow things down, communicate with eye contact and adjust as needed. As you get more adventurous, try positions that allow for deeper angles — but remember: doggy style might look hot in porn, but it also carries more risk of injury if you’re not aligned or communicating. Looking to build confidence and skill before you explore together? Our Mind Blowing Oral: Penis Edition course can help with foreplay and prep. Learn with Dr. Jess Mind Blowing Oral Video Course: Penis Edition 50% OFF with code DRJESSVIP Stuck in a routine?

Dr. Ali Mushtaq joins us to share his journey from a conservative upbringing to leather title holder and discusses how BDSM education can be more inclusive and justice-oriented. Some of the questions he covers includes: When and why is it important to talk about race in BDSM? How can we bring anti-oppression frameworks to kinky spaces? How do you walk to a partner about racial inequality? What is sexual racism and how does it cause harm — physically and emotionally? How do power dynamics develop in relation to erotic associations? To learn more about Dr. Ali’s work, visit GettingWolfie.com And check out our sponsor, OhMyG at IOBAToys.com and save 30% off with code DRJESS. Don't forget, for couples who are interested and would like to participate in a study with Couples and Sexual Health Lab, to check them out on Instagram for more information. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Kinky Sex, Race & Social Justice  (00:00): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Jess (00:19): Hey, hey, Jess O’Reilly, your friendly neighbourhood sexologist here with my always lovely other half Brandon Ware. Brandon (00:27): Got to be honest, I'm not sure what to say. Now I feel like that's my my only line. Jess (00:33) I am in a really good mood this week. Lots of good stuff going on, including a big celebration. We are celebrating twenty years together sometime this week. We don't know what day but sometime this week, we hit twenty years. Like it's just, it's such a crazy feeling every year at this time. I reflect on that week that we met that lucky for you, I hit on you because you never hit on me. And you had your mom's purple Ford Escort and we hung out the Escort and then basically moved in together the next day, but twenty years is just so mind blowing to me, 'cause I I feel like a kid. I don't know if it's because we don't have kids, but I feel like I'm still in my twenties, I don't know. Brandon (01:22) Time flies. I will say it's surprising to think that twenty years has whipped by. And what feels great for me is that I'm excited for what the next hopefully sixty years brings. But yeah, I looked at that photo that you post and I was contemplating my style selection twenty years ago. But I'm glad that you still decided to hit on me. Jess (01:48) You’re talking about the photo I posted on instagram. I was dressed as a cat, so I I had on cat ears. I think it was a halloween but it may not have been halloween. Yeah like thinking back to twenty years ago just feels so good, and it's interesting because one of the activities sometimes we do with couples, is we get them to retell the story of how they met, when they met, and what it felt like, and what they remember. And sometimes just reflecting upon the past kind of reinvigorates some of the passion chemicals that you experienced in the beginning. And I definitely feel that, like when we were in lying in bed the other night kind of just chatting about what it was like when we were younger and I I really don't feel older but I feel, I don't know, like life obviously isn't as, I don't know if I want to say chaotic as it was then. We used to stay up so late, we'd eat our dinner at the convenience store at like 3 ...

To celebrate Masturbation May we’re joined by Dr. Megan Stubbs, author of Playing without a partner, a single’s guide to sex, dating, and happiness, who weighs in on these questions and more! What are the advantages of being single? Is it okay to keep going back to my ex? What does it mean if my partner of over a year hasn’t said I love you? Is autocunnlingus possible? What is edging? Why is everyone always complaining about dating and what can we do about it? How can you talk to a new partner about sensitive topics? What can you do if you’re gassy on a date? Megan's book discusses embracing and enjoying life as a single, while steering people away from the idea of what they think a single lifestyle should look like. Follow Megan on Twitter and her Instagram. Thanks to our wonderful sponsor Adam & Eve. Offering 50% off almost any item including shipping with code DRJESS. If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript:  This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Solo Sex, Dating, Edging & More (00:00): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Jess (00:15): Hey, hey, Jessica O’Reilly, your friendly neighbourhood sexologist here, on my own without Brandon this week. But he will return for next week's episode, I promise. And I'm excited today. Because we're talking about auto cunnilingus, when to say I love you, sex with an ex, and most importantly, it is masturbation may so we will be talking about self pleasure with an old friend of mine Dr. Megan Stubbs, a sexologist and now an author who has a brand new book all about self love, and self pleasure, and navigating life on your own. It's on the shelves coming at you right about now. Before Megan joins me, I want to answer some of your super interesting questions you sent in, as well as say a big shoutout to our sponsors at AdamandEve.com. AdamandEve.com. They're offering fifty percent off almost any item plus free shipping and a host of other free gifts with code DRJESS — d. r. j. e. s. s. AdamandEve.com cells pretty much everything, from lube and massage oils to plugs and vibrators, dildos, restraints, and lingerie, and all of the fun stuff you can use to spice up the bedroom. So check them out — AdamandEve.com, and again use code Dr. Jess to save. Jess (01:46): Now I wanna start with the topic of auto cunnilingus, because the other day I got a couple of questions about auto cunnilingus from somebody who wanted to know whether or not it's possible and how to do it, and it's not something I've spent much time talking about or thinking about so I had to spend some time looking up what I could find, chatting with some clients, and basically auto cunnilingus refers to going down on yourself, so on your labia. So not on a penis, which might for some people potentially be easier to reach, still pretty unrealistic for most people, but auto cunnilingus, so going down on yourself, just in the end isn't realistic for most of us. If you are a really talented and probably professionally trained acrobat or contortionist, maybe it's doable. But in all of the spaces I've been in, where I see people doing all sorts of sexual things, like festivals and parties and gatherings, I've never seen it happen. It doesn't mean it's impossible.

This week we explore surprising hot spots on the body including the Million Dollar Mark as well as a variety of erotic touch techniques from the Liquid Trace to the Breath Kiss. We also answer a listener question about whether or not to invite an ex to your wedding. Thanks to our amazing sponsor OMG by IOBA. I love this toy! Save 30% with code DRJESS And don’t forget to tune into Intimately You with Dr. Jess on CityTV Fridays at midnight starting May 14th -- presented by TSC! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 212: Exes, Erogenous Zones & Erotic Massage (00:05): You're listening to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:16): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my always lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:24): I'm not so lovely today. Brandon (00:27): I think you're lovely. And I'm not just saying that for brownie points. Dr. Jess (00:31): You're being sarcastic. Brandon (00:32): You’re hot. Dr. Jess (00:33): Oh, I’m nice to look at. That's not what I meant. I have a bad attitude. Brandon (00:37): You got the bad attitude all right. You got a bad-a-tude. Yeah you hot. Dr. Jess (00:41): It's been a day. Brandon (00:43): It has. Dr. Jess (00:44): I have to say. So I had such a wild day today, it was a bit of a rough one where I started with a live shoot, and our internet went down, and I pissed off the live audience, and a whole bunch of other things went down. Not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. But then I had therapy, so I just talked to my therapist Carla and I feel, I don't know like nine notches calmer. Brandon (01:03): That's great. Dr. Jess (01:04): Yeah. Brandon (01:05): I went upstairs and banged my head into the wall. Dr. Jess (01:08): It sounded like you were working out. Brandon (01:10): Yeah I did. I did some calisthenics. Dr. Jess (01:13): So you did your work out. I got my therapy. Are you feeling calmer? Brandon (01:16): I always feel calmer after I am physical. Dr. Jess (01:20): I thought you were gonna say you feel calmer after I go to therapy Brandon (01:25): I always feel better when you have therapy. No, I feel, I feel better all right. Dr. Jess (01:28): You've got your outlet. I've got mine. Now we're gonna be talking about erogenous zones today. Hopefully we'll get into some erotic massage techniques, we have a question about exes. Before we dive in, I want to say thank you to OhMyG, they are our sponsor today. This is a super quiet toy by Ioba that massages the G zone internally, with this come hither kind of swirling motion. It's really, really, cool. So if you picture a dildo with a kind of c-shape shaped curve to it, so that it gets really nicely into that G zone and at the tip of it, it has sort of an elongated pearl the size of a chocolate covered almond at the inner end, and it curves and pulses at varying speeds. I like the lowest speed, like slow and sensual. But you can turn it up if you like more intensity, and it's nice and quiet. It's made of body safe silicone and you can check it out on my reels on instagram if you wanna see how it works. Or you can head over to https://www.

Dr. Shemeka Thorpe is a brilliant sex researcher, post-doctoral fellow and the founder of the Minority Sex Report. She joins us to talk about her latest research and we answer some of your burning questions including: I can't get into receiving oral sex. Is something wrong with me? What's the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality? How do I get over my partner's past? How can we improve sexual communication? How do we manage pain during sex? How do I advocate for myself with health professionals? Check out Dr. Shemeka Thorpe's work (including her database of BIPOC Pelvic Floor Therapists) & follow her on Instagram where she is #MakingResearchRelevant. And be sure to check out our new partner femtasy.com -- an all audio streaming platform that will help you to uncover new fantasies, explore latent desires and put you in the mood for pleasure. Whether you like romance, kink or something wild, Femtasy has you covered and they're running a 99 cent special for Masturbation May. Have a listen and let us know what you think! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns.   Episode 211: Sexual Communication & Research with Dr. Shemeka (00:05): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:14): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast. I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess Dr. Jess (00:21): Hey. Today we are answering a few questions from some of our college student listeners. Looking forward to those and we're going to be digging into the latest research about sexual pain and getting some advice on how to communicate our needs and improve our sex lives from Dr. Shemeka Thorpe. And I'm such a fan of her work. So yeah I'm really excited for this one. And I'm also really thrilled to announce a new partnership that we've just formed with a platform that I have been following and recommending and using personally for quite some time. They're called Femtasy. So Femtasy is an audio only streaming service with short erotic stories, and because my seduction style is audio, I love this concept right. No videos no photos, just narrated fantasies geared at women, but I think folks of all genders will actually be drawn in. It's designed to be a safe space, so the stories are ethically produced with their voice actors, they have over five hundred short stories, that for me are way more likely to get in the mood then visual depiction so. And this is great timing because we're coming up on masturbation may and they've actually dropped their prices really significantly to celebrate so full access is just ninety nine cents a month or ninety nine for the year, so if you do want to explore your fantasies or learn more about how to even figure out what your fantasies are, because so many people say they don't have fantasies. I think Femtasy is a great place to start. It's just one way to take time out for yourself and escape reality. And I've been listening to their audio for a while now and I'm actually going to see if I can play a sample in one of our upcoming episodes, because I think it will give you a taste. For in the meantime you can head over to their site and listen to some samples for free, so you can see if it's a great fit for you at htt...

Got sexual and pelvic health questions? We’ve got answers! Dr. Rachel Gelman, Doctor of Physical Therapy and pelvic floor specialist returns to answer your questions related to sex, pleasure and pelvic floor functioning including: What is bumper sex? What can I do about leaking when I laugh? How do bowel movements affect pelvic floor function and sexual response? Why is anal pleasure so much hotter after my second child? What causes painful erections and how do you treat them? How do you promote stronger erections — for penises & clitorises? How does sitting at your desk all day affect sexual functioning? Why does oral feel so good after childbirth? How can changing the way you breathe promote pelvic floor function? Learn more about Dr. Rachel Gelman at www.pelvicwellpt.com and follow her on social: IG: @pelvichealthsf twitter: @rachelgdpt FB: @pelvicwellpt And if you're shopping for goodies, be sure to use code DRJESS at AdamAndEve.com to save 50% almost any single item + free shipping + bonus gifts! If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 210: Erections, Orgasms & More! Advice from a Pelvic Floor Specialist  (00:02): You're listening to the Sex with Dr. Jess podcast. Sex and relationship advice you can use tonight. Brandon (00:10): Welcome to the Sex With Dr. Jess podcast I'm your co host Brandon Ware here with my lovely other half Dr. Jess. Dr. Jess (00:17): Hey hey. Brandon (00:18): Hey, how’re you doing? Dr. Jess (00:20): Good good. Today we’re talking about some hot topics. We're talking stronger erections, oral sex, anal sex, and how it changes after childbirth. I don't know about that. But I want to hear about that. Leaking when you laugh. Do you leak when you laugh? Brandon (00:33): I do not leak when I laugh. Dr. Jess (00:36): Do you laugh? Brandon (00:37): I mean I'm hilarious, so I laugh all the time. Dr. Jess (00:39): You laugh at your own jokes. Brandon (00:40): I do. You know I woke up last night laughing to a dream. Dr. Jess (00:44): Do you not remember that I actually thought you were crying? So I was like, “baby it's okay” and you're like laughing. Brandon (00:50): I was laughing for real. I woke up. It was something, somebody farted in my dream. And I thought it was funny. Dr. Jess (00:54): Is that true? Brandon (00:55): Yeah that's the truth. I don't know who farted. But it was real funny. That's all it takes. That's all it takes to make me laugh. So if you ever see me chuckling, I'm probably thinking of somebody farting okay? Dr. Jess (01:05): So you don't leak when you laugh but you laugh in your sleep when someone farts? Brandon (01:09): Yes. Dr. Jess (01:10): Well that's funny because we're also going to be talking about bowel movements and constipation. We're going to be talking about bumper sex, the pussy pocket. Brandon (01:19): I'm thinking of bumper cars now. Dr. Jess (01:21): I just pictured people walking around with erections bumping each other. Brandon (01:25): I feel like that could be so painful so quickly. Dr. Jess (01:27): That's probably why it's so funny to me. Brandon (01:30): Maybe to you yeah. Dr. Jess (01:31):

How do you keep things exciting amid a repetitive routine? How can adults be more playful (because playfulness is associated with happier relationships & hotter sex)? What simple changes can you implement to make your daily interactions more fun, passionate and erotic — even if you’re super busy? You’re not a light switch, so you likely can’t get turned on in the blink of an eye. This week, to celebrate our wedding anniversary, we share 20+ specific strategies and action items you can use to make your relationship more romantic, intimate and erotic. If you’re looking to add a new toy to your collection or for something that will buzz and vibrate bringing new and intense pleasure, check out our friends at Lovehoney, We-Vibe and Womanizer. Use code DRJESS15 at checkout to save! Big thanks to our sponsors AdamandEve.com — use code DRJESS50 to save 50% off almost any single item + get FREE gifts and free shipping. From dildos to butt plugs to lube and lingerie, they’ve got you covered. Check out AdamAndEve.com and use code DRJESS50 to save 50% off almost any one item with FREE shipping. And if you have podcast questions, please submit them here. You can find the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Episode 341 - Eroticize Daily Interactions: 20 Actionable Tips For Busy Couples Intro: You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice. You can use tonight. Dr. Jess: Hey, we've got a replay of one of my favorite topics, one of my favorite episodes on eroticizing daily interactions from April 2021, so you might hear some references to a totally different time. It's a time warp. Brandon: Welcome to the Sex with Dr. Jess Podcast. I am your co host, Brandon Ware, here with my lovely other half, Dr. Jess. Hey, hey. How are you? Dr. Jess: I'm feeling good. I'm feeling good. I'm interested in this conversation for the two of us as well. We're going to be talking about how to make your daily interactions more erotic and What are you laughing at? Brandon: I'm immediately thinking about eating a banana. Dr. Jess: Oh my gosh, because in my presentations I always talk about how [00:01:00] to eroticize daily interactions because you're not a light switch. You can't go from talking about your taxes and your work and your kids and whether or not your dog had a bowel movement on its last walk to just flipping the switch and being, oh, hi. Hey. Tear my clothes off, right? And my joke is when I say To eroticize your daily interactions. I don't mean make everything annoyingly erotic, right? I don't want to be eating a banana and have Brandon look over and be like, Oh yeah, you eat that banana. That's what I'm talking about. It's really more about playfulness and flirtation and I don't know, all these different ways to be erotic. It doesn't have to be super sexual or graphic. So we're going to be getting into that. I mean, I guess before we do, I should ask you, Do you feel like our interactions are particularly erotic? Brandon: I don't think that I'm an erotic person. I feel very self conscious whenever I'm [00:02:00] trying to do something that I think is erotic, whether I've seen it on, you know, TV, movie, somewhere, I feel like a goof doing it. So when I see people who are genuinely erotic and they just exude the sex appeal, I'm, I'm like, good on you because when I try that, I feel like I look like a goof. I don't know. Or I sound like a girl. Hey, Dr. Jess: yeah. No, but you are naturally charming. Like flirtation is sort of charming.

What are the causes of pain postpartum? How can you soothe your own pain and what exercises and massage techniques can help? What does self massage entail — both directly and indirectly? And how do you assess readiness for sex postpartum? How does a Caesarian birth affect sexual functioning? Perinatal Therapist, Janette Yee, joins us to answer these questions and more. Janette's Caesarean Birth Selfcare course is now available for sign up at any time. Previously the four lessons were taught live; now they're available pre-recorded, along with over 20 how-to videos illustrating self-massage techniques and exercises. Cost: $199 Introductory bonus: access to 6 months of weekly live online group classes with Janette every Wednesday at 1pm EST. She teaches a mini-lesson, runs a mini-workout, and answers questions. All recorded and available to all students within 24 hours. (Value: $2600) Follow Janette on Instagram & LinkedIn. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast is sponsored by Adam & Eve. Use code DRJESS to save 50% off 1 item + bonus goodies!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Sex After Childbirth: Techniques & Strategies From a Perinatal Therapist 00:00:05 - 00:05:15 You're listening to the sex with dr. Jess podcast sex and relationship advice you can you off tonight? Hey, hey, this is Brandon. We're ready to talk sex and relationships with dr. Yes. How's it going? I like that voice now. I just want to shut it off just you and me. Let's just go. Let's get out of here sexy time. Yeah, not if you call it sexy time game. Well, the mood is over. So back to the show. We actually have a new retail partner for our podcast and they are offering a bunch of free stuff to our listeners as well as some deep discounts. So most folks have probably heard of Adam and Eve and they sell everything from lingerie Vibes two rings to toys to King Kong. Have and with code. Dr. Jess Jess, you get 50% off one item plus a bunch of free gifts. So they're giving you six free movies free shipping and three extra treats you can use to spice things up in bed. So please do go check out your options and use code d r j e s s office to save 50% off your one item and get your bonus goodies at Adam and Eve, It can be sexy time right now for everybody. This is why I'm still here. Well, at least I'm having a good time. You know, sometimes we in life we run behind and twenty Twenty-One has been a year for me off of just falling behind. So today we're actually going to Aaron interview that we recorded a few months ago, and we had intended to release it earlier, but you know, Bob If circumstances got in the way and we didn't get to and this was such an interesting interview for me because it's all new stuff related to postpartum Wellness bought a pleasure and overall health that relates to all of us not just people who are postpartum and our guest Jeanette. She is passionate perinatal therapist a mother of two months or more competitive Runner and rugby player and she's working really hard to improve perinatal health care and this really includes quality of life issues around sexual relationships in April is actually cesarean birth awareness month. So our delay makes for good timing. So without further Ado,

A listener shares their story and feelings after having had cheated on their long-term partner. They ask for help managing the guilt and shame and Jess & Brandon weigh in on the topic with a discussion of: Whether or not to tell your partner about an affair Why talking about cheating can be helpful in all relationships How to talk about affairs in the hypothetical to improve understanding in relationships How the language of confession can feel burdensome How to manage feelings of guilt How to forgive yourself How to work through feelings of shame How to practice self-compassion How to learn from previous regrets Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How to Forgive Yourself After Youve Cheated 00:00:05 - 00:05:02 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr jasser. Podcast co host brandon. Wear here with my always. Lovely other half dr jess. Hey hey how's it going and good today we're gonna be we're gonna be talking about something serious going to be talking about how to get over an affair. I look forward to your answers. I wanna know what you think. I think this is an important conversation for everyone in a relationship. But we're actually going to be talking about it from the perspective of the cheater Interesting how to move through the guilt and the shame so before we get to the question that somebody sent in one a shout out our sponsor. Let's get checked dot com. They offer all sorts of home wellness and health tests including s. t. is and. I was actually looking at some research out of canada this morning by going to try and get this right. The sex information and education council of canada came out with data showing that young people are reporting lower access to sexual health and reproductive health services since the onset of the pandemic make sense when you think about them perhaps not being on campus and having access to different sexual health counseling And free hall centers especially when we think about so. Many people may be living at home. And maybe they need their parents to drive them someplace. And don't wanna ask so. This is an option for folks. Let's get checked. You receive a box at kit and you take your sample by yourself. At home you mail it in and they provide your results securely online anna matter of days so folks please do check it out. Let's get checked dot com and please please use code dr jess to save and also so that they know you heard about it here. All right so. I'm going to read out the question that i received about how to get over the guilt and shame and other associated feelings of cheating because this is a tough one. I wanted to actually spend some time on it with you. So this person writes in and says i've been in a serious relationship for almost twelve years. We've been cohabitating for eleven years during our ninth year together. I had an affair after sleeping with the other person for the second time i felt tremendous guilt and i cut off all ties. Haven't told my partner. And at this point i don't think it's worth it.

Adam Maurer joins us to crush on Brandon, sass Jess (with love) and answer your sex questions including: How do I pick between partners — a safe partner versus one with whom the sex is hotter? How do I deal with the fact that I love my boyfriend, but I’m no longer find him physically appealing? How can fetishes reduce stress and cultivate connection? What can we do to maintain attraction over time? What can we do to make the relationship run more smoothly? How can individual's growth potentially threaten a relationship? How do trauma responses affect partner and relationship decisions? How do I deal with a dental visit knowing that I have a dental fetish? Follow Adam on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Fetishes as Healing & How to Build Attraction 00:00:05 - 00:05:04 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess. How's it going. i'm excited. What four going to be talking to my friend and we. We need to dive right in. Because i know they have a lot to say so much to say you know what we should really spent some time catching up on our frisbee skills with adam. I feel as though you and our guests are gonna gonna pick on me today. I'm very much looking for this conversation before we welcome them. I wanna give a quick shout to. Let's get checked folks if you have any health tests that are overdue or do anything. From s t is to hormones to cholesterol to diabetes to lyme disease to seal eac. It is covered by. Let's get checked. They send you the test. You take your own sample you mail it in and you check your results securely online. It's let's get checked dot com. Please use code doctor jess to save at checkout and also to let them know that you heard about it here during a pandemic can't be a better time than doing your own testing at home. You know if. I don't have to leave my house i won't. That is the absolute truth unless it's to go on a plane unless it's gonna play. I want my haircut here. My teeth cleaned here also. So let's get checked using her own code. I have have actually alright without further ado. Let's dive right in. Adam is a gender queer straight friendly therapist. From austin texas she is a defender of pleasure and a slayer of shame bitch who loves to dish out wisdom on sex love and mental health here with us. Today is the fabulous miss adam. Our how you doing. I'm so good. I was just thinking man. You having on once and shame on me for tricking you into that without you to what you're getting into and so you have all the troubles on you well. Last time you complained. That brand wasn't here. And so i was a little late to the meeting today. Actually i wasn't late. You both were early. And i walked in and you were you were chatting with one. Another unsupervised discussing the terms of our recent pro frisbee sponsorship agreements. And how amazing they are because as everybody knows just is a frisbee fiend and call it desk tonette just keeping up to...

Happy couples from across the globe share their best advice for richer relationships. From the relational to the emotional to the sexual, the happiest couples - of all ages weigh in on what makes their relationships thrive. This episode is brought to you by Desire Cruises - a unique experience for adventurous couples! Join us as we cruise to the Greek Isles in August and the South of France next Spring 2024. If you have podcast questions, please submit them here. Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health, or other professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Top Relationship Tips From Happier Couples: 8 Secrets To Success Episode 332 [00:00:00] You're listening to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast, sex and relationship advice. You can use tonight. [00:00:13] Brandon Ware: Welcome to the sex with Dr. Jess podcast. And today we are about to head out on the desire cruise. [00:00:21] Jess O'Reilly: That's right. We're hitting the Greek isles. We're hitting Turkey. You're going to make a cruise sound. [00:00:26] Brandon Ware: No, I'm, I'm so much more mature than that. [00:00:28] Brandon Ware: Don't you know me better? [00:00:29] Jess O'Reilly: I can see you. Yeah. Yeah. Why does your boat sound like a donkey? [00:00:34] Brandon Ware: I don't know. It just does. [00:00:35] Jess O'Reilly: If I heard that sound, I'm not getting on the boat. [00:00:37] Brandon Ware: Yeah. Okay. [00:00:37] Jess O'Reilly: So, pretty excited. This is, I don't know. Is this our sixth Desire Cruise? [00:00:41] Brandon Ware: I believe that it is. [00:00:42] Jess O'Reilly: We've been on pretty much all of them except the ones over New Year's because that's our week off. [00:00:47] Jess O'Reilly: And every time we're on board, I'm collecting information. Not necessarily... data, but people's insights and experiences because it's just such a broad range of guests here. So there are around 700 people on board. There are 44 countries represented. I don't have the breakdown of this specific cruise, but from the last one, a few months ago, from that, I know that there were of the 700, around 300 Americans, 50 Canadians, 57 Mexicans. [00:01:16] Jess O'Reilly: Handful from India, 16 Brazilians, another handful of Colombians, around a hundred from Europe. When I kind of look, okay, that's the UK. They've exited. I did. [00:01:29] Brandon Ware: I also did the German though, or maybe it was Austrian. [00:01:31] Jess O'Reilly: Actually UK is a big contingent. I don't know why I didn't write them down, but there's a good number from the UK. [00:01:36] Jess O'Reilly: Folks from New Zealand, Singapore, South Africa, Taiwan, a nice contingent from. Central and South America. So I met Chileans, Costa Ricans, Ecuadorians, Venezuelans, a handful from Lebanon. I met a couple from Korea. And so, and there's, there's kind of a broad age range, right there. I think there might be a couple who are quite young in their twenties, but just like a handful of, let's be [00:02:00] honest, women. [00:02:00] Jess O'Reilly: Yeah. I don't think there's any guys in their twenties, then a handful in their thirties, many in their forties. And then a bunch in their fifties and beyond. And so for me, there's just so much learning here because people hail from all over the world. They come on this cruise for so many different reasons. [00:02:16] Jess O'Reilly: You know, I've spoken about this before that yes, it's clothing optional in certain areas. Yes, it's erotic themed. Yes, there are very interactive workshops and there's even a playroom should you deci...

The brilliant Luna Matatas joins us to answer your sex and pleasure questions including: How do you stimulate the prostate? What are the best anal toys for beginners? What are lactation fetishes? Does size matter? How do I get over body image issues before I go to a play party? How can I bring up fetishes to a partner? How can we normalize anal play and pegging? How can I pleasure my partner externally? Follow Luna on Facebook, Twitter, Youtube & Instagram. Be sure to listen to The Plug Podcast with Luna Matatas. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. And drawing from this podcast, be sure to check out Womanizer's sale on their Starlet & Pro.       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. Fetishes, Butt Play & Does Size Matter? 00:00:05 - 00:05:01 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess hello brandon. Whoa hello there. I'm why did you say like. I don't know i like. I like saying your name brandon brandon. Because i don't really call you britain in real life you do not call you. Hey you know. And i respond. I call you babe. Yaeko call you babe to let's it. It's easy so we never forget each other's names we never screwed up. Oh i'm gonna mood today. I'm so excited because one of my best. Tease is about to join us in just a minute. She's the best in the business. She is funny and punny and creative and empathetic and full of the best sex ed info. We are talking about sex and pleasure educator luna matas who teaches people how to build better relationships to their bodies helps people to practice empathy with their partners in terms of insecurities needs and really encourages people to get curious about all things erotic and all of her work is trauma and equity informed. She talks about pleasure. Topics like anal play and feminine dominance and threesomes and unicorns and she hosts a podcast. Herself called the plug. And we're going to be chatting with luna about body image and pegging and normalizing anal play. And i we have a question about a small penis some fetishes and more so before luna joins us. It is great. I mean she's just fantastic confer excited to. I know i love chatting with her. And i chat with almost every day offline now. I guess it's online technically. Everything's online now. But i wanted to just draw attention to the fact that my friends at womanizer are having a sale right now. I just noticed on the starlet and pro and if you're not familiar with womanizer toys who they are among my personal favourite they are. This is a brand that is really an industry disrupter in that they patented created brand new technology a few years ago that never existed in sex toys before they hit the scene and they call it. Pleasure air so pleasure. Air technologies technology is one of the most direct paths to orgasms for so many people who have clitorises and i would describe this. Sensations as sort of a cross between pulsing inviting and sucking and kissing. And it's all around the sensitive head of the clitoris. So it's kind of a tiny little opening that fits around the head of your quit.

Dr. Shari Nicole, Psychologist and Key Consultant of Everyday Psychology, joins us to talk about the importance and challenge of adult friendships. We discuss cutoff culture, attachments styles, boosting confidence and more including answers to these common questions: How many friends do most people have? How do childhood experiences affect adult friendships? How do you know if a friendship is worth saving? How do you know that it’s time to break up with a friend? How do you go about breaking up with a friend? How do friendships affect intimate relationships? How do friendships differ according to gender? How can you be more confident in your friendships? Follow Dr. Shari on Instagram and Facebook. Be sure to check out her podcast 3 Psychs and a Mic. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript. This podcast has been sponsored by Let’sGetChecked. Use code DRJESS to save at checkout!       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. How to Break Up With A Friend 00:00:05 - 00:05:03 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess how are you. I'm good man. You know. I'm excited for today. Because i have a lot to learn about this topic we are going to be talking about friendship and it is such an important topic because friendship's just like intimate relationships can have such a significant effect on your mental health. You're physical health happiness life. Ill meant and as i started digging into the research while one thing i found is that social isolation has actually increased over the last few decades in north america. And i'm talking far prior to covid. And i was looking at the two thousand six study found that the number of friends people feel they can discuss important matters with reduce to well. There's two in there. That's pretty good. Yeah so it fell from two point nine four so almost three in one thousand nine hundred five to two point. Zero eight thousand four. I'm sorry but that's all right is does does your partner. If you're in a relationship does your partner count as a friend to the in this study. Do you know that's a great question. I'm not sure. Because i feel like i don't know that i would have two point nine or three friends with whom i would feel comfortable discussing serious matters. I think i can think of one. Maybe two depending on the topic. But if if you're not in that mix it's it's now you know you can't tell mysterious That's interesting because i start to think about my numbers. And how do i say this. I'm not sure it's particularly relevant. How many there are right. I don't know that it's that. I need eight versus four. Or you know. It's so easy to say like when i was counting. You know as i do this. I have you and there are four others in my life whom i feel. I can approach with really serious stuff. There are probably actually more than that. But there's four that i'm kind of close with and i don't wanna look at this and say oh i'm above the two point zero eight. I think really what matters is the quality of the relationship as opposed to the number of friends. But as i did dig into the research.

Thanks to medical research and breakthroughs, we now have the tools to end the HIV epidemic. Unfortunately, we’re still a long way off on account of stigma, misinformation and a lack of awareness with regard to prevention options. So it’s essential that we talk about it. Brad McElya, joins us to take a deeper dive into the topic of HIV and answers your questions including: How have approaches to HIV shifted since the 80s? Is HIV transmission possible if you have an undetectable viral load? What is PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) and how does it work to prevent transmission? Who should consider PrEP? Why is HIV still an epidemic when we have the tools to eradicate it? How do we chip away at the stigma that hinders testing, prevention and treatment? How can we normalize conversations about HIV and how can your local pharmacist help? We also discuss the new ArcWave Ion and Brandon provides a very personal and detailed review of his first time using this stroker + pleasure-air technology. You don’t want to miss it! Brad is Walgreens' Director of Specialty Health Solutions. Walgreens pharmacists receive specialized training in confidential and compassionate HIV care. Learn more at Walgreens.com/prep or visit your local Walgreens and request a consult in a private room. And you can chat online 24/7 with a pharmacist here. Please see here for a rough version of this transcript.       If you’ve got questions or topic suggestions for the podcast, submit them here. As well, you can now record your messages for us! Please record your message/question in a quiet room and use your phone’s headphones with a built-in mic if possible. And be sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Podbean, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music & Stitcher! Rough Transcript: This is a computer-generated rough transcript, so please excuse any typos. This podcast is an informational conversation and is not a substitute for medical, health or other professional advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the services of an appropriate professional should you have individual questions or concerns. What You Dont Know About HIV 00:00:05 - 00:05:11 You're listening to the sacs with dr jess podcast sacks and relationship advice you can use tonight Welcome to the sex with dr. Just podcast i'm your co host brandon. Wear here with my lovely other. Half dr jess how are you. I'm good. i'm so happy to have you back. Because i was on on my own last week and i promised everyone that brand would be back. And that i'd hand you the reins to talk about touching yourself. Well i'm glad and i was also wondering. Where was i last week when i was busy with work and i am sorry that i missed it. I love these podcasts. I love learning and listening and asking questions. I know i know well today. I'm going to be handing you the reins To talk about your with the arc wave but we're also going to be talking about the hiv epidemic and how it can be a radical added. We have the tools to eradicate it. And i was thinking about. You know when we look back to the eighties there was so much fear around hiv aids and so much misinformation. That was fueled by but also reinforcing of you know homophobia and racism and hiv. I remember when i studied social movements in school Hiv was such an important piece of you know so many social uprisings at the time and we had groups like aids action now and i remember studying it and then now it seems as though it's just kind of taken a backseat in part. Because the fear isn't as strong which is a good thing. We now know that you know an hiv diagnosis is not a death sentence which we saw it as back. Then we knew. And we know that you can live a long healthy high-quality life being hiv positive. Especially if you have access to resources like medications and we know that quality of life is really now the focus of hiv care but we also know that like all medical care.