Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast Relationships 2.0 With Dr. Michelle Skeen

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Alex Korb PhD author of The Upward Spiral Workbook: A Practical Neuroscience Program for Reversing the Course of Depression About the book: Positive life changes lead to positive brain changes. Drawing on the huge success of his groundbreaking book, The Upward Spiral, neuroscientist Alex Korb offers actionable, step-by-step skills to help you reshape your brain and create an upward spiral towards a happier, healthier life. Depression is defined by a collection of symptoms. You feel crappy most of the time. Nothing seems interesting, and everything seems overwhelming. You have trouble with sleep. You feel guilty and anxious and have thoughts that life isn’t worth living. Each symptom reinforces and inspires new symptoms, and this is a sign that your brain circuits are caught in the downward spiral of depression. So, how can you reverse it? In his first book, The Upward Spiral, neuroscientist Alex Korb demystified the intricate brain processes that cause depression and outlined a practical and effective approach for getting better. Based on the latest research, this evidence-based workbook takes the theory behind Korb’s breakthrough book and distills it into concrete, actionable exercises and skills. Just as one small trigger can drag you down, an effective intervention can start enough momentum to carry you back up. Exercise, attention to breathing, gratitude, sleep hygiene, and positive social interactions are just some of the offerings in this workbook that can help alter activity in specific neural circuits, setting you on the path toward an upward spiral to happiness and well-being. About the author: Alex Korb, PhD, is a neuroscientist who has studied the brain and mental health for over fifteen years, starting with an undergraduate degree in neuroscience from Brown University. He received his PhD in neuroscience from the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), where he wrote his dissertation and numerous scientific articles on depression. He is author of The Upward Spiral, and is currently adjunct assistant professor at UCLA in the department of psychiatry. Outside of the lab, he is a scientific consultant for the biotech industry, and is head coach of the UCLA Women’s Ultimate Frisbee team. He has a wealth of experience in yoga and mindfulness, physical fitness, and even stand-up comedy.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guests are Marc Bekoff and Jessica Pierce authors of Unleashing Your Dog: A Field Guide to Giving Your Canine Companion the Best Life Possible About the book: No matter how cushy their lives, dogs live on our terms. They compromise their freedom and instinctual pleasure, as well as their innate strategies for coping with stress and anxiety, in exchange for the love, comfort, and care they get from us. But it is possible to let dogs be dogs without wreaking havoc on our lives, as biologist Marc Bekoff and bioethicist Jessica Pierce show in this fascinating book. They begin by illuminating the true nature of dogs and helping us “walk in their paws.” They reveal what smell, taste, touch, sight, and hearing mean to dogs and then guide readers through everyday ways of enhancing dogs’ freedom in safe, mutually happy ways. The rewards, they show, are great for dog and human alike. About the authors: The author or editor of thirty books, Marc Bekoff, PhD, is professor emeritus of ecology and evolutionary biology at the University of Colorado, Boulder, and a former Guggenheim fellow. The author of ten books and hundreds of articles, Jessica Pierce, PhD, is faculty affiliate at the University of Colorado Center for Bioethics and Humanities.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is James Creighton PhD author of Loving Through Your Differences: Building Strong Relationships From Separate Realities About the book: Dr. James Creighton has worked with couples for decades, facilitating communication and conflict resolution and teaching them the tools to build healthy, happy relationships. He has found that many couples start out believing they like the same things, see people the same way, and share a united take on the world. But inevitably differences crop up, and it can be profoundly discouraging to find that one’s partner sees a person, situation, or decision completely differently. Although many relationships flounder at this point, Creighton shows that this can actually be an opportunity to forge stronger ties. In Loving through Your Differences, he draws on the latest research in cognitive science and developmental psychology to show how we invent our realities with our perceptual minds. He then provides clear, concrete tools for shifting our perceptions and reframing our responses. The result moves couples out of the fear and alienation of “your way or my way” and into a deep understanding of the other that allows for an “our way.” As Creighton shows, this way of being together, based on the reality of individuality rather than the illusion of sameness, sets the stage for long-term excitement, discovery, and fulfillment. About the author: In addition to working with couples, James L. Creighton, PhD, has conducted communication trainings, mediations, and conflict-resolution processes for universities, public schools, the Job Corps, Fortune 500 corporations, and government entities. He lives in Kihei, Hawaii.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Evan M. Forman PhD author of Effective Weight Loss: An Acceptance-Based Behavioral Approach About the book: The obesity epidemic is one of the most serious public health threats confronting the nation and the world. The majority of overweight individuals want to lose weight, but the overall success of self-administered diets and commercial weight loss programs is very poor. Scientific findings suggest that the problem boils down to adherence. The dietary and physical activity recommendations that weight loss programs promote are effective; however, people have difficulty initiating and maintaining changes. Effective Weight Loss presents 25 detailed sessions of an empirically supported, cognitive-behavioral treatment package called Acceptance-Based Behavioral Treatment (ABT). The foundation of this approach is comprised of the nutritional, physical activity, and behavioral components of the most successful, gold-standard behavioral weight loss programs. These components are synthesized with acceptance, willingness, behavioral commitment, motivation, and relapse prevention strategies drawn from a range of therapies. ABT is based on the idea that specialized self-control skills are necessary for weight control, given our innate desire to consume delicious foods and to conserve energy by avoiding physical activity. These self-control skills revolve around a willingness to choose behaviors that may be perceived as uncomfortable, for the sake of a more valuable objective. The Clinician Guide is geared towards helping administer treatment, and the companion Workbook provides summaries of session content, exercises, worksheets, handouts, and assignments for patients and clients receiving the treatment. The books will appeal to psychologists, primary care physicians, nutritionists, dieticians, and other clinicians who counsel the overweight. About the author: Evan Forman, PhD, is a Professor of Psychology at Drexel University and Co-Director of the Laboratory for Innovations in Health-Related Behavior Change. He also serves as Director of Graduate Studies and Chair of the Society for Clinical Psychology’s Committee on Science and Practice and is Past-President of the Philadelphia Behavior Therapy Association. He has been the lead investigator of several National Institute of Health-sponsored trials, including two comparing the effectiveness and processes of traditional cognitive therapy to newer acceptance-based behavior therapies. He also has been funded to examine the feasibility and effectiveness of smartphone and computerized neurocognitive training interventions for weight control.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Evan M. Forman PhD co-editor/author of Mindfulness and Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders & Weight Concerns: Evidence-based Interventions About the book: Disordered eating, negative body image, and problems with weight have become an epidemic—and research shows that traditional treatments are not always effective. This professional resource offers proven-effective interventions using mindfulness and acceptance for treating clients with disordered eating, body image, or weight issues—and for whom other treatments have failed. Millions of people in the United States suffer from eating disorders, and dissatisfaction with weight and body type—even in individuals whose weight is considered normal—is similarly widespread. In addition, more than half of Americans could benefit from healthy weight loss. Unfortunately, not all people with eating disorders or weight concerns respond to traditional therapeutic interventions; many continue to suffer significant symptoms even after treatment. What these clients need is an integrated therapeutic approach that will prove effective in the long run—like the scientifically backed methods in this much-needed clinical guide. Edited by Ann F. Haynos, Jason Lillis, Evan M. Forman, and Meghan L. Butryn; and with contributors including Kay Segal, Debra Safer, and Hugo Alberts; Mindfulness and Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders and Weight Concerns is the first professional resource to incorporate a variety of proven-effective acceptance- and mindfulness-based approaches—such as acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT)—into the treatment of persistent disordered eating, body image issues, and weight problems. With these evidence-based interventions, you’ll be ready to help your clients move beyond their problems with disordered eating, body dissatisfaction, and weight management once and for all. About the editor/author: Evan M. Forman, PhD, is professor and director of graduate studies for the department of psychology at Drexel University in Philadelphia, PA, as well codirector of the Laboratory for Innovations in Health-Related Behavior Change. His research, which is funded by the National Institutes of Health and the Obesity Society, focuses on using technology and new behavioral frameworks to enhance interventions for health behavior change, especially obesity.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guests are W. Brad Johnson, PhD & David Smith, PhD authors of Athena Rising: How and Why Men Should Mentor Women About the book: Increasingly, new employees and junior members of any profession are encouraged-sometimes stridently-to “find a mentor!” Four decades of research reveals that the effects of mentorship can be profound and enduring; strong mentoring relationships have the capacity to transform individuals and entire organizations. Organizations that retain and promote top talent-both female and male-are more likely to thrive. But the mentoring landscape is unequal. Evidence consistently shows that women face more barriers in securing mentorships than men, and when they do find a mentor, they may reap a narrower range of both career and psychological benefits. Athena Rising is a book for men about how to mentor women deliberately and effectively. It is a straightforward, no-nonsense manual for helping men of all institutions, organizations, and businesses to become excellent mentors to women. Co-authors W. Brad Johnson, PhD and David Smith, PhD draw from extensive research and years of experience as experts in mentoring relationships and gender workplace issues. When a man mentors a woman, they explain, the relationship is often complicated by conventional gender roles and at times hostile external perceptions. Traditional notions of mentoring are often modeled on male-to-male relationships-the sort that begin on the golf course, involve a nearly exclusive focus on career achievement, and include more than a few slaps on the back over drinks after work. But women often report a desire for mentoring that integrates career and interpersonal needs. Women want a mentor who not only “gets” this, but truly honors it. Men need to fully appreciate just how crucial their support of promising junior women can be in helping them to persist, promote, and thrive in their vocations and organizations. As women succeed, lean in, and assume leading roles in any organization or work context, that culture will become more egalitarian, effective, and prone to retaining top talent. About the authors: W. Brad Johnson, PhD is professor of psychology in the Department of Leadership, Ethics, and Law at the United States Naval Academy, and a faculty associate in the Graduate School of Education at Johns Hopkins University. A clinical psychologist and former Lieutenant Commander in the Navy’s Medical Service Corps, Dr. Johnson served as a psychologist at Bethesda Naval Hospital and the Medical Clinic at Pearl Harbor where he was the division head for psychology. He is a fellow of the American Psychological Association and recipient of the Johns Hopkins University Teaching Excellence Award. He has served as chair of the American Psychological Association’s Ethics Committee and as president of the Society for Military Psychology. Dr. Johnson is the author of more than 100 journal articles and book chapters—many on the topic of mentoring—and 12 books, in the areas of mentoring, professional ethics, and counseling. Books of related interest include: On Being a Mentor: A Guide for Higher Education Faculty (2nd Ed.) (2015), The Elements of Mentoring (Revised Ed.) (2008, with Charles Ridley), The Elements of Ethics for Professionals (2008, with Charles Ridley), and Becoming a Leader the Annapolis Way (2006, with Greg Harper). David Smith, PhD is an active duty U.S. Navy Captain and permanent military professor in the Department of Leadership, Ethics, and Law at the United States Naval Academy having served four years as the chair. A former Navy Pilot, Dr. Smith led diverse organizations of women and men culminating in command of a squadron in combat and flew more than 3,000 hours over 19 years including combat missions in Iraq and Afghanistan. As a sociologist trained in military sociology and social psychology, he focuses his research in gender, work, and family issues including dual career families, military families, women in the military, and retention of women. Dr. Smith is the author of numerous journal articles and book chapters—many on the topic of gender and the workplace. His most recent publications include: “On the Fast Track: Dual Military Couples Navigating Institutional Structures” in Contemporary Perspectives in Family Research (2013), “Dual Military Families: Confronting a Stubborn Military Institution” in Military Families and War in the 21st Century, Comparative Perspectives (2015), “Leadership and Peer Behaviors: Women in Combat” in Military Medicine (2016) and “Gender and the Military Profession: Early Career Influences, Attitudes and Intentions.” in Armed Forces & Society.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Jeremy Cage author of All Dreams on Deck: Charting the Course for Your Life and Work About the book: Set sail for the adventure of your life and work! As Katie Couric, journalist, author and Yahoo Global News Anchor attests, ”Jeremy Cage has written a great book that everyone who thinks about how to better balance work-life issues would benefit from reading….he’s also shown us how to better navigate life’s personal and professional challenges.” All Dreams on Deck will help you articulate your most important dreams in work and life and will then give you a practical approach for realizing those dreams. Through engaging, real-life examples, you will be inspired to live life to your full potential. Author Jeremy Cage, President of the Cage Group, begins with the premise that there is no such thing as work-life balance. There is only life balance–of which work is an important part. With this as the foundation, he will guide you through a simple and actionable approach to determining the most important components of your life–the Grab Bags in your LifeBoat–then chart the course to making all the dreams in that LifeBoat a reality. Jeremy, who has lived and worked in nine countries, has used this approach to help thousands of executives, managers, and their teams unleash their potential. He has also realized his own dreams by taking a sixteen-month sabbatical to sail around the world with his family before returning to the US to launch several exciting new companies. So rather than theoretical mumbo jumbo, Jeremy presents compelling, real-life examples of how to dream specifically, get highly intentional about those dreams, plan and prepare well–then summon the courage to set sail. About the author: Jeremy Cage’s life mission is to help unleash the full potential of as many businesses and as many people as he possibly can. His business experience spans three decades of delivering strong, profitable business growth for Procter & Gamble, Schering-Plough Healthcare, PepsiCo, The Lighting Science Group, and his own firm, The Cage Group. He is a truly global citizen, having lived and worked in Germany, France, Belgium, Sweden, the United Kingdom, Venezuela, Brazil, Mexico, and the United States. Jeremy believes that most businesses and most people regardless of how successful they have been to date do not actually achieve their full potential ”as defined by them.” Committed to not letting that happen in his own life, he embarked on a sixteen-month voyage to sail the world, with his wife, Pat, and their kids, Bradley and Elena. This stretched his leadership skills, built his courage, pushed him beyond his comfort zone, and stimulated his creativity through interactions with new cultures and people. Jeremy’s unique combination of business adventures and life adventures forms the foundation of the tools he uses to create breakthrough strategy, marketing, innovation, and people solutions for a diverse range of Fortune 500 companies.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Ann Haynos PhD co-editor/author of Mindfulness and Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders & Weight Concerns: Evidence-based Interventions About the book: Disordered eating, negative body image, and problems with weight have become an epidemic—and research shows that traditional treatments are not always effective. This professional resource offers proven-effective interventions using mindfulness and acceptance for treating clients with disordered eating, body image, or weight issues—and for whom other treatments have failed. Millions of people in the United States suffer from eating disorders, and dissatisfaction with weight and body type—even in individuals whose weight is considered normal—is similarly widespread. In addition, more than half of Americans could benefit from healthy weight loss. Unfortunately, not all people with eating disorders or weight concerns respond to traditional therapeutic interventions; many continue to suffer significant symptoms even after treatment. What these clients need is an integrated therapeutic approach that will prove effective in the long run—like the scientifically backed methods in this much-needed clinical guide. Edited by Ann F. Haynos, Jason Lillis, Evan M. Forman, and Meghan L. Butryn; and with contributors including Kay Segal, Debra Safer, and Hugo Alberts; Mindfulness and Acceptance for Treating Eating Disorders and Weight Concerns is the first professional resource to incorporate a variety of proven-effective acceptance- and mindfulness-based approaches—such as acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT)—into the treatment of persistent disordered eating, body image issues, and weight problems. With these evidence-based interventions, you’ll be ready to help your clients move beyond their problems with disordered eating, body dissatisfaction, and weight management once and for all. About the editor/author: Editor Ann F. Haynos, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and T32 postdoctoral research fellow funded by the National Institute of Mental Health through the department of psychiatry at the University of Minnesota Medical Center. Haynos’s research interests pertain to identifying the underlying mechanisms associated with the development and maintenance of disordered eating, and developing and evaluating treatments for eating disorders and weight concerns. In a clinical capacity, Haynos has worked primarily with individuals with eating disorders using dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) models.

This podcast is the first in a series of chats that Arthur and I will be having about relationships. If you have questions that you would like us to answer you can email me at michelle@michelleskeen.com To find out more about Arthur go to www.balanceyoursuccess.com

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Carol Lambert MSW author of Women with Controlling Partners: Taking Back Your Life from a Manipulative or Abusive Partner About the book: A controlling or abusive partner can break even the strongest person—unless you know what to look for. Written by an expert in intimate partner abuse and based on her highly successful recovery program for women with controlling partners, this book will give you the strength, courage, and strategies you need to acknowledge the problem and stand up for yourself once and for all—whether you stay or leave the relationship. If you have a controlling partner, you aren’t alone. Millions of women suffer psychological abuse at the hands of a spouse or intimate partner during some point in their lives, not fully seeing or knowing what is happening to them. Research shows that psychological abuse affects women’s overall well-being more than physical abuse, is a bigger contributor to inducing fear, and can be a precursor to violence. To make matters worse, having a controlling partner often results in hidden injuries like anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, trauma, and low self-efficacy—feeling like you can’t make a difference in your life. So, where can you turn for help? Based on over a decade of clinical and domestic abuse research, Women with Controlling Partners will help you identify the coercive constraints that can be predictive of intimate partner abuse, recognize the harmful effects of psychological abuse on your mental and physical health, and gain the personal strength and power to break free. Using the author’s three-stage recovery model, you’ll be empowered to move out of denial, deconstruct what holds you psychologically captive, and take back your life. Abuse can be devastating, and having a controlling partner can make you feel crazy—and as if you’re the one responsible. But you’re not crazy, and you’re not to blame! With this important, one-of-a-kind recovery process, you’ll finally find the clarity of mind, courage, and strength to protect yourself from the hurtful control that damages your mental and physical health, and move toward a safer and happier life. About the author: Carol A. Lambert, MSW, is a psychotherapist and domestic violence expert with three decades of clinical experience helping individuals and groups, and a career-long commitment to women’s psychological health. Since 1993, she developed a unique approach and cofounded the Recovery Groups for Women with Controlling Partners that bring together insights from mental health, trauma recovery, and domestic violence. At McLean Hospital, a psychiatric hospital affiliated with Harvard Medical School, she provides domestic violence training and consultation. Over the years, her expertise took her from educating volunteers in a domestic violence program affiliated with local police to providing training and consultation to the National Football League. In all her endeavors, she brings critical attention to psychological abuse and the major losses to women’s mental and physical health. She’s currently in private clinical practice in Belmont and Concord, MA.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Arthur Ciaramicoli PhD author of The Stress Solution. We discuss the stressful period we all endured during the Presidential campaign and election, as well as the challenges we continue to face individually and collectively. Many relationships are strained and need to be healed. So, I thought it would be a good time to discuss the importance of compassion, character and values. We need to find ways to come together rather than grow further apart. My guest: Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, Ed.D., Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who has been treating clients for more than 35 years. He is the Chief Medical Officer of Soundmindz.org a popular mental health site. He is also a member of the American Psychological Association and the Massachusetts Psycho-logical Association. Currently in private practice, Dr. Ciaramicoli has been on the faculty of Harvard Medical School for several years, lecturer for the American Cancer Society, Chief Psychologist at Metrowest Medical Center, and director of the Metrowest Counseling Center and of the Alternative Medicine division of Metrowest Wellness Center in Framingham, Massachusetts. In addition to treating patients, Dr. Ciaramicoli has lectured at Harvard Health Services, Boston College Counseling Center, the Space Telescope Science Institute in Baltimore as well as being a consultant to several major corporations in the Boston area. Dr. Ciaramicoli is also a seasoned media expert. He has appeared on CNN, CNNfn, Fox News Boston, Comcast TV, New England Cable News, Good Morning America Weekend, The O’Reilly Report, and other shows. He has been a weekly radio guest on Your Healthy Family on Sirius Satellite Radio and Holistic Health Today, and has been interviewed on The People’s Pharmacy, The Gary Null Show, and more than two dozen other radio programs airing on NPR, XM Radio, and numerous AM and FM stations. Dr. Ciaramicoli is the author of The Stress Solution: How Using Empathy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy decreases Anxiety and increases Resilience (New World Library, 2016), The Curse of the Capable: The Hidden Challenges to a Balanced, Healthy, High Achieving Life (Wiley, 2010), Performance Addiction: The Dangerous New Syndrome and How to Stop It from Ruining Your Life (Wiley 2004) and The Power of Empathy: A Practical Guide to Creating Intimacy, Self-Understanding, and Lasting Love (Dutton 2000), which is now published in 7 languages. His first book, Treatment of Abuse and Addiction, A Holistic Approach (Jason Aronson, 1997) was selected as Book of the Month by The Psychotherapy Book News. He is also the coauthor of Beyond the Influence: Understanding and Defeating Alcoholism (Bantam 2000).

This week on Relationships 2.0 Helene Segura, author of The Inefficiency Assassin: Time Management Tactics for Working Smarter Not Longer is back to give us a New Year’s reboot to help us create and maintain new habits. About the book: Slay procrastination, distraction, and overwhelm! The Inefficiency Assassin™ presents a revolution in time management books – a way to improve productivity and Kick Chaos to the Curb™ once and for all! You will learn how to: Create productive calendars, yet morph time when you need to put out fires (or chase the opportunity of lifetime) Slay lost time and beat back overwhelm from procrastination, interruptions and distractions Implement productivity hacks so you can excel professionally and have a life outside of work This book is exactly what professionals-on-the-go and entrepreneurs need! This time management book addresses and solves every known productivity road block known to man…and woman. Readers who implement the strategies and tactics in this guide will never have an issue with time management again. Period. Ever. The end. About the author: Do you want to wake up 10 years from now and lament, “I wish I’d lived a little more instead of work around the clock”? Helene Segura doesn’t want to either. That’s why she tells her time what to do – and teaches busy professionals how to do the same by slaying lost time. The author of two Amazon best-selling books, Helene has been the featured productivity expert in more than 100 media interviews. During her time management keynotes and workshops, she shares her mind-bending framework for decreasing interruptions, distractions and procrastination so that companies can spend more time generating revenue. On weekends, Helene can be found experimenting with recipes or sneaking adult beverages onto the lawn bowling court. To connect with Helene or for details about her third book, The Inefficiency Assassin: Time Management Tactics for Working Smarter, Not Longer (New World Library 2016), visit www.HeleneSegura.com.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Holly B. Rogers, MD author of The Mindful Twenty-Something: Life Skills to Handle Stress…& Everything Else While my daughter (and co-author of Communication Skills for Teens) was home from college, we had the opportunity to chat with Holly about her new book. About the book: In The Mindful Twenty-Something, the cofounder of the extremely popular Koru Mindfulness program developed at Duke University presents a unique, evidence-based approach to help you make important life decisions with clarity and confidence. As a twenty-something, you may feel like you are being pulled in dozen different directions. With the daily tumult, busyness, and major life changes you experience as a young adult, you may also be particularly vulnerable to stress and its negative effects. Emerging adulthood, which occurs between the ages of 18 and 29, is a developmental stage of life when you’re faced with important decisions about school, relationships, sex, your career, and more. With so much going on, you need a guide to help you navigate with less stress and more ease. The Koru Mindfulness program, developed at Duke University and already in use on numerous college campuses—including Harvard, Yale, Princeton, MIT, Dartmouth, and several others—and in treatment centers across the country, is the only evidence-based mindfulness training program for young adults that has been empirically proven to have significant benefits for sleep, perceived stress, and self-compassion. Now, with The Mindful Twenty-Something, this popular program is accessible to all young adults struggling with stress. With Koru Mindfulness and the practical tools you’ll learn from this acceptance-based, proven-effective approach, you’ll be able to cultivate the compassion and mindfulness skills you need to manage life’s challenges from a calm, balanced center, regardless of what comes your way. About the author: Holly Rogers, M.D. is one of the developers of Koru, an evidence-based program for teaching mindfulness and meditation to college-age adults. Holly works as a psychiatrist at the student counseling center at Duke University where she helps students integrate the practice of mindfulness into their lives in a meaningful way. She is a clinical associate in the department of psychiatry at Duke University Medical Center. She is the co-author with Margaret Mayan of Mindfulness for the Next Generation: Helping Emerging Adults Manage Stress and Lead Healthier Lives. Her latest book, The Mindful Twenty-Something, is a guide for young adults who wish to learn about using mindfulness and meditation to enhance their journey through emerging adulthood.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Eva Hagberg Fisher author of How To Be Loved: A Memoir of Lifesaving Friendship About the book: A luminous memoir about how friendship saved one woman’s life, for anyone who has loved a friend who was sick, grieving, or lost—and for anyone who has struggled to seek or accept help Eva Hagberg Fisher spent her lonely youth looking everywhere for connection: drugs, alcohol, therapists, boyfriends, girlfriends. Sometimes she found it, but always temporarily. Then, at age thirty, an undiscovered mass in her brain ruptured. So did her life. A brain surgery marked only the beginning of a long journey, and when her illness hit a critical stage, it forced her to finally admit the long‑suppressed truth: she was vulnerable, she needed help, and she longed to grow. She needed true friendship for the first time. How to Be Loved is the story of how an isolated person’s life was ripped apart only to be gently stitched back together through friendship, and the recovery—of many stripes—that came along the way. It explores the isolation so many of us feel despite living in an age of constant connectivity; how our ambitions sometimes pull us apart more than bring us together; and how a simple doughnut, delivered by a caring soul, can become the essence of what makes a life valuable. With gorgeous prose shot through with empathy, pain, fear, and the secret truths inside all of us, Eva writes about the friends who taught her to grow up and open her heart—and how the relentlessness of suffering can give rise to the greatest joy. About the author: Eva Hagberg Fisher's writing has appeared in the New York Times, T: The New York Times Style Magazine, Tin House, Wallpaper*, Wired, Guernica, and Dwell, among other places. She lives in California and New York City.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Colleen Ehrnstrom, Phd, ABPP author of End the Insomnia Struggle: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help You Get to Sleep and Stay Asleep About the book: Insomnia is all too common in our modern culture, and can be devastating to your mental and physical health. Packed with research-based strategies and practical tools, this fully customizable book will show anyone who suffers with insomnia how to get a good night’s sleep—night after night—for a better life. Everyone struggles with sleep from time to time, but when sleepless nights and overtired days become the norm, your well-being is compromised, and frustration and worry increase—including concerns about what’s stopping you from getting the sleep you need, and what can be done about it. So, how do you stop the cycle of relentless worries and restless nights? End the Insomnia Struggle offers a comprehensive, medication-free program that can be individually tailored for anyone who struggles with insomnia. Integrating the physiology of sleep, and proven-effective approaches from cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), this book provides step-by-step guidance for developing your own treatment plan according to your particular challenges with insomnia. With this book, you’ll have everything you need to overcome the relentless thoughts, ruminations, and stress of insomnia. Utilizing these evidence-based strategies and easy-to-use tools, you’ll finally get to sleep, stay asleep, and wake up rested and ready to face the world as your best self, day after day. About the author: Colleen Ehrnstrom, PhD, ABPP, is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). She is board certified in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and works in the family program at the Department of Veterans Affairs in Denver, CO. Alisha L. Brosse, PhD, is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in behavioral therapies for a wide range of presenting problems, especially sleep, mood, and anxiety disorders. She operates a private practice in Boulder, CO, and directs a bipolar specialty clinic at the University of Colorado Boulder.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Mark Coleman author of Make Peace With Your Mind: How Mindfulness and Compassion Can Free You From Your Inner Critic About the book: The inner critic is the voice inside our heads reminding us that we are never “good enough.” It’s behind the insidious thoughts that can make us second-guess our every action and doubt our own value. The inner critic might feel overpowering, but it can be managed effectively. Meditation teacher and therapist Mark Coleman helps readers understand and free themselves from the inner critic using the tools of mindfulness and compassion. Each chapter offers constructive insights into what creates, drives, and disarms the critic; real people’s journeys to inspire and guide readers; and simple practices anyone can use to live a free, happy, and flourishing life. About the author: Mark Coleman is a senior meditation teacher at Spirit Rock Meditation Center, an executive coach, and the founder of the Mindfulness Institute, which brings mindfulness training to organizations worldwide.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Chetan Parkyn author of The Book of Destinies: Discover the Life You Were Born To Live About the book: Have you ever wondered about your life’s purpose? The next step in the life-changing Human Design system, The Book of Destinies presents in-depth profiles of the 192 Life Themes that encompass humanity. Based on the place, date, and time of your birth, your Life Theme reveals a remarkably detailed portrait of your true nature, allowing you the peace of knowing who you really are so you can live your life with clarity and fulfillment. Instead of struggling to achieve unsuitable goals, you can align yourself with a deeper plan for your relationships, career, and decision making. Many passages include a list of noted people who share that Life Theme. The culmination of the authors’ twenty years of research, practice, meditation, and readings, The Book of Destinies is for anyone who has ever stopped to wonder, “What is my life purpose, and how do I realize it?” About the author: Chetan Parkyn has been reading for people for nearly 30 years. Born in England, Chetan initially obtained a mechanical engineering degree and apprenticeship and traveled the world troubleshooting various engineering projects. An entrepreneur’s son by upbringing and an engineer by training, Chetan has fully explored both the mystical and the technological worlds. Among other things, he’s been a deep-sea dive engineer and a devoted student of meditation. He traveled extensively through the United States, Europe, the Middle East and Africa in the late 1970’s. Travels in India and studies with the enlightened mystic, Osho, finally opened Chetan to his own gifts — helping people develop self-knowledge. In 1979 in India, Chetan was guided by a savant to notice his own intuitive skills, and was encouraged to practice for a system that would be revealed to him. He started studying esoteric systems and became adept at reading hands (palmistry) and tarot cards. He also studied the IChing, Astrology and other systems in depth. In 1993, he was one of the first people in the USA to be introduced to the Human Design System, a system that was first discovered in 1987. He has spent the past 18 years mastering and teaching Human Design. As the author of the first major book on the subject, he has made it his mission to bring Human Design to the whole planet. To date he has read for thousands of people worldwide and given classes to many hundreds of others. In 2009 Harper Collins UK published Chetan’s book : Human Design : Discover the Person You Were Born to Be. Combined with powerful free software, this makes it easy for everyone to learn about this remarkable new system. New World Library, USA published an American version, and presently there are Japanese, Chinese, Turkish and Greek language versions too. Thanks to Chetan Parkyn, Human Design is now becoming available to the whole planet. Chetan’s second book was released in June 2012. The Book of Lines, A 21st Century View of the IChing, the Chinese Book of Changes, has been written particularly for Human Design but also for all lovers of the IChing who seek a view of each aspect of that amazing body of knowledge presented in remarkable clarity. The Human Design System is an extraordinary self-knowledge system, and Chetan’s methods of describing how it works practically within a person’s life are remarkably insightful and gifted. His readings help others to have a clear viewing of themselves and their relationships and to have increased effectiveness in all aspects of their lives. Chetan resides in Palm Desert, California, USA and gives sessions over the phone, by Skype or in person, worldwide. He reads for individuals, couples and businesses including people of all ages and backgrounds. His counseling for individuals, couples and businesses is world renowned and his guidance to parents concerning the Designs of their children is always acknowledged as extremely helpful, potentially circumventing years of misunderstanding for both parent and child! Together with his wife and partner, Carola Eastwood, Chetan offers classes in Human Design for those who wish to study it at any level. It can be clearly said that his readings are life-transforming, and his classes are both entertaining and thoroughly informative.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Sam Bennett author of Start Right Where You Are: How Little Changes Can Make a Big Difference for Overwhelmed Procrastinators, Frustrated Overachievers, and Recovering Perfectionists About the book: What Are You Waiting For? An overwhelmed procrastinator, frustrated overachiever, and recovering perfectionist herself, Sam Bennett knows all the ways we avoid pursuing our dreams and reaching our goals. She also knows how to “get it done.” Start Right Where You Are is an easy-to-read, easy-to-do guidebook for anyone who wants to change their life but doesn’t know where or how to begin. Of course, the process of getting out of your own way, raising your self-esteem, improving your relationships, and making better choices can be a bumpy road. But Bennett’s fun, original voice lets you know that you’ve got a friend along the way, a friend who offers a comforting cup of tea — or a bracing shot of whiskey, depending. Her gentle-kiss-on-the-cheek and loving-thwack-upside-the-head attitude gives us what we all need: inspiration, shortcuts, and breathing room. About the author: Sam Bennett is the creator of http://www.TheOrganizedArtistCompany.com, dedicated to helping creative people get unstuck from whatever way they’re stuck, especially by helping them focus and move forward on their goals. Originally from Chicago, Bennett is a writer, actor, teacher and creativity/productivity specialist who has counseled thousands of artists on their way to success. She is the bestselling author of, “Get It Done: From Procrastination to Creative Genius in 15 Minutes a Day,” which Seth Godin called, “an instant classic, essential reading for anyone who wants to make a ruckus.” Her latest book is, “Start Right Where You Are: How Little Changes Can Make a Big Difference for Overwhelmed Procrastinators, Frustrated Overachievers and Recovering Perfectionists” (New World Library).

My radio show on Thursday December 1, 2016 This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Andrea Wachter LMFT author of Getting Over Overeating for Teens: A Workbook to Transform Your Relationship with Food Using CBT, Mindfulness and Intuitive Eating. About the book: Transform your relationship with food, once and for all. Written by a family therapist and eating disorder specialist, this skills-based workbook will give you the tools you need to manage your emotions and find the comfort and sweetness you truly seek in life–without overeating! If you struggle with overeating, you are not alone. Studies show that millions of teens face problems with emotional eating and negative body image. Getting Over Overeating for Teens, written by an eating disorders specialist who struggled with her own issues as a teen, provides a wealth of tools to help you change your relationship with food. Using an integrated approach that includes cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), mindfulness, and intuitive eating, this book will focus on the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual factors that are essential to overcoming overeating. With the powerful exercises in this book, you’ll come to a better understanding of your urges to overeat, and learn skills such as emotion regulation, assertive communication, moderate eating, and working with cravings. Most importantly, you’ll find healthy ways to fill up and apply what you’ve learned to living a healthier, happier life. About the author: Andrea Wachter, LMFT is co-author of The Don’t Diet, Live-It! Workbook and Mirror, Mirror on the Wall: Breaking the “I Feel Fat” Spell. She has over twenty-five years of experience working with children, teens, adults, families and groups. Wachter is passionate about helping people who are struggling with eating disorders, body image, substance abuse, depression, anxiety, grief and relationships. She is an inspirational counselor, author, and speaker who uses professional expertise, humor and personal recovery to help others. Check out her Huffington Post blogs at andreawachter.com.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Matthew Skinta, PhD, ABPP co-author of Mindfulness & Acceptance for Gender & Sexual Minorities: A Clinician’s Guide to Fostering Compassion, Connection & Equality Using Contextual Strategies While this book was written for clinicians, it is a great resource for understanding the challenges that gender and sexual minorities face. It was a great springboard for an illuminating conversation with Matthew. About the book: As more clinicians train in mindfulness and acceptance-based therapies, the demand for skills specifically for treating diverse clients grows. In this much-needed edited volume, you’ll find evidence-based strategies for treating gender and sexual minorities with acceptance and compassion for better treatment outcomes. Gender and sexual minorities face unique concerns and, according to research, are actually more likely to want and seek therapeutic help due to greater levels of psychological distress. But research also shows that many psychologists and therapists do not feel adequately educated or efficacious discussing topics related to sexuality and gender in clinical practice. This book will address this significant gap with evidence-based and best-practice interventions and applications. Mindfulness and Acceptance for Gender and Sexual Minorities offers a number of practical strategies within a contextual behavioral science framework, including mindfulness and acceptance-based interventions, compassion-focused therapy (CFT), acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), relational frame theory (RFT), and more. With chapters on stigma, shame, relationships, and parenting, this book will be a valuable resource for all therapists. If you’re a clinician, you understand the ongoing need for cutting-edge, effective approaches for treating a variety of clients. With this guide, you’ll learn about the unique application of contextual behavioral approaches as they relate specifically to the experiences of gender and sexual minorities, and feel better equipped to help all of your clients work toward happiness and health. About the authors: Editor Matthew D. Skinta, PhD, ABPP, is a board-certified clinical health psychologist who lives with his husband in San Francisco, CA. In addition to having a private practice, he is core clinical faculty at Palo Alto University, where he directs the Sexual and Gender Identities Clinic. Skinta’s past research has focused on the impact of stigma and shame on health behaviors of sexual minority men, particularly as it relates to sexual health and HIV-related care. He is a peer-reviewed acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) trainer, and is certified as both a compassion cultivation training (CCT) teacher, and as a trainer of functional analytic psychotherapy (FAP). Editor Aisling Curtin, MSc, is a registered counseling psychologist at the Psychological Society of Ireland who lives with her partner in Dublin, Ireland. She is director of ACT Now Ireland, has a small private practice, and consults with a number of organizations to deliver acceptance and mindfulness workshops. Aisling teaches in many university training programs, and regularly gives workshops internationally on sexuality from a mindfulness and acceptance vantage point. She is a peer-reviewed ACT and FAP trainer.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Amelia Kinkade author of Whispers From the Wild: Listening to Voices from the Animal Kingdom About the book: One of the world’s most renowned animal communicators, Amelia Kinkade has brought thousands into closer contact with their beloved dogs, cats, birds, and horses. Now she shares the wonders of her recent work communicating with wild, and in some cases endangered, animals. Amelia takes readers on a rollicking ride as she visits with tigers, elephants, lions, great white sharks, black mamba snakes, whales, and bees. Traveling all over the world, Amelia reveals the inner thoughts and feelings of these extraordinary animals and shares the advice she has gleaned — words about tenderness, reconnection with nature, life after death, and the possibilities of magical awakenings inside the brains of an ever-evolving human race. Anyone with a heart, mind, and funny bone will delight in this invitation to understand and appreciate our fellow inhabitants of planet Earth. About the author: Amelia Kinkade is the author of Straight From the Horse’s Mouth: How to Talk to Animals and Get Answers (Crown Books),The Language of Miracles: A Celebrated Psychic Teaches You to Talk to Animals (New World Library), Soulmates with Paws, Hooves, and Wings, Aurora’s Secret, and The Winged One. (CreateSpace) She is the founder of The Language of Miracle’s Institute in Southern California. Amelia is an international speaker who lectures in the United States, Canada, England, Scotland, Sweden, Germany, Norway, Switzerland, Austria, and South Africa where she trains animal lovers from all walks of life including doctors and vets. Amelia was featured in The 100 Top Psychics in America. (Simon and Schuster) Her unique abilities have been the focus of hundreds of magazines and newspaper articles world-wide including The New York Times, The Chicago Tribune, ABC News, The Boston North Shore Sunday, The London Sunday News of The World, Good Housekeeping, Cat Fancy, Dog Fancy, New Woman in England, Bilt de Frau in Germany, Annabelle in Switzerland, and the cover of the Freitseit Kurier in Vienna. Miss Kinkade has appeared on television programs such as The View, The Other Half, The Ellen Degeneres Show, Extra, VH1, Jenny Jones, The BBC News, Carte Blanche in South Africa, and numerous news broadcasts in the US, Europe, and Australia. She has been heard on over 300 radio programs in the last few years from Memphis to Cape Town, South Africa. A BBC documentary was created around her work with the elephants in the Kruger National Park and a BBC children’s programming tour was created for her youngest most open-minded fans. Amelia’s true passion is assisting organizations in Africa who rescue elephants, cheetah, penguins, sharks, lions, and rhinos and trouble-shooting problems worldwide for tigers, primates, Asian elephants and countless breeds of exotic as well as domestic animals. In 2002, she was honored to accept invitations to Buckingham Palace to work with the household cavalry of Queen Elizabeth II and to “whisper” with the hunting horses of Prince Charles. Amelia is also privileged to work with Olympic show horses who competed in the Olympics in 2013. The Winged One is Amelia’s first illustrated book that features her own artwork and she is utterly delighted to share her drawings with the world. Please visit: www.Ameliakinkade.com.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Ann Marie Dobosz author of The Perfectionism Workbook for Teens About the book: Unhealthy perfectionism can result in low self-esteem, severe anxiety, and self-destructive behavior—and teens are especially vulnerable. Based in proven-effective cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), this workbook will help you develop the self-compassion and mindfulness tools you need to counteract the negative effects of perfectionism and develop new, healthy skills for boosting your self-confidence. In our high-pressure society, it’s easy to hold ourselves (and others) to impossibly high standards. And when we fail to meet those standards—as we inevitably do—we may become overly critical of ourselves, or lash out toward others. While perfectionism is often associated with positive traits, such as conscientiousness, ambition, and pride in good work, dysfunctional perfectionism is destructive and can lead to anxiety, low self-esteem, relationship problems, and a number of mental health concerns, like depression, procrastination, and self-harm. With The Perfectionism Workbook for Teens, you’ll gain a clear understanding of what perfectionism is and learn to differentiate between healthy and unhealthy perfectionism so you’ll be better able to manage your own and others’ expectations. Using powerful tools drawn from cognitive behavioral and mindfulness-based therapies, you’ll learn to identify your perfectionist thoughts, discover new ways of responding to your critical inner voice, and build the skills you need to combat negative behaviors based in perfectionism, like chronic procrastination. If perfectionism is causing trouble in your life, the techniques and exercises in this book will help you develop non-perfectionist skills and habits, leading to reduced fear, anxiety, and shame, and increased self-compassion and confidence in getting things done and handling daily pressures. About the author: Ann Marie Dobosz, MA, MFT, is a psychotherapist in private practice in San Francisco, CA, and mental health specialist for ReachOut USA. She has been passionate about youth health and well-being from her days as an editor at Ms. Magazine, where she focused on issues affecting teens and young adults. In her current work as a mental health professional, she specializes in helping people of all ages change unhealthy perfectionist patterns.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Candace V. Love (Part 3) author of No More Narcissists: How to Stop Choosing Self-Absorbed Men and Find the Love You Deserve. In part 3 of my chat with Candace we discuss her book in the context of current events. About the book: Why do some women date, or even marry, narcissistic men—over and over? In this provocative book, a clinical psychologist and expert in narcissism offers 7 secrets to help women finally break free from their attraction to narcissistic men. Do you keep finding yourself in relationships with narcissistic men? Is your boyfriend or husband solely focused on fulfilling their own needs and unable to see things from your perspective? If you’re tired of dealing with a self-absorbed partner and are ready to be treated with kindness, respect, and sensitivity, this book is for you. In No More Narcissists!, psychologist Candace Love provides a road map for women to finally get the love they deserve. Using skills based in cognitive behavioral and schema therapy, you’ll gain an understanding of why you’re attracted to narcissistic men, how you can avoid being drawn in by a narcissist’s initial charm and magnetism, and how to heal so you can finally move on to healthy relationships. You’ll find out how the basic principles of schema theory—core beliefs about ourselves and our environment that we acquire in childhood and adolescence—can play an important role in why you’re attracted to narcissists and seek them out. Also included are targeted exercises and techniques that will encourage you to examine your past relationships and take meaningful steps to promote self-care and healing. Isn’t it time you broke the cycle of hurt, frustration, and pain that comes with loving a narcissist? This book will show you how to let go of these destructive relationships once and for all, love yourself unconditionally, and find the love you deserve. About the author: As a licensed clinical psychologist, Candace V. Love, PhD, is passionate about helping women avoid narcissistic relationships. As founder and president of North Shore Behavioral Medicine, which has offices in downtown Chicago and Grayslake, IL, Love uses evidence-based techniques derived from cognitive behavioral therapies, including mindfulness and schema therapy. Much of her spare time is divided between the least narcissistic of creatures—namely animals. She enjoys riding horses and rehabilitating feral cats in the woods behind her home, and indulging in the next foodie find—whether it be a gourmet meal, vintage wine, or craft beer.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Jonice Webb, PhD author of Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect. About the book: Running on Empty is the first self-help book about Emotional Neglect: an invisible force from your childhood which you can’t see, but may be affecting you profoundly to this day. It is about what didn’t happen in your childhood, what wasn’t said, and what cannot be remembered. Do you sometimes feel as if you’re just going through the motions in life? Are you good at looking and acting as if you’re fine, but secretly feel lonely and disconnected? Perhaps you have a fine life and are good at your work, but somehow it’s just not enough to make you happy. If so, you are not alone. The world is full of people who have an innate sense that something is wrong with them. Who feel they live on the outside looking in, but have no explanation for their feeling and no way to put it into words. Who blame themselves for not being happier. If you are one of these people, you may fear that you are not connected enough to your spouse, or that you don’t feel pleasure or love as profoundly as others do. Perhaps when you do experience strong emotions, you have difficulty understanding or tolerating them. You may drink too much, or eat too much, or risk too much, in an attempt to feel something good. In over twenty years of practicing psychology, many people have arrived in Jonice Webb’s office, driven by the threat of divorce or the onset of depression, or by loneliness, and said, “”Something is missing in me.”" Running on Empty will give you clear strategies for how to heal, and offers a special chapter for mental health professionals. In the world of human suffering, this book is an Emotional Smart Bomb meant to eradicate the effects of an invisible enemy. About the author: Jonice Webb has a PhD in clinical psychology, and has been licensed to practice since 1991. She has a strong background in research, psychological testing and psychotherapy. Webb has been the Director of three large outpatient clinics over the course of her career. She currently has a private psychotherapy practice in Lexington, MA, where she specializes in the treatment of couples and adolescents. Webb currently resides in the Boston area with her husband and two children.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Cheryl Fraser, PhD author of Buddha's Bedroom: The Mindful Loving Path to Sexual Passion & Lifelong Intimacy About the book: In this playful and sexually savvy guide, “Dr. Cheryl” Fraser presents enlivening mindfulness exercises, techniques from couples and sex therapy, and the wisdom of Buddhist teachings to help you spark the passion and thrill you’ve been seeking in your relationship. With this book, couples can break free from the monotony of familiar routines and bring a little nirvana back to the bedroom for a more exciting, loving, and fulfilling connection. The beginning of a relationship is always thrilling—butterflies in the stomach; that sense that someone really gets you; that “love drunk,” “walking on air” feeling. But as time goes by, and the tedium of daily life intervenes, you may find yourself too busy, tired, or just unmotivated to devote quality time and attention to the connection you crave. So, how do you uncover the passion and thrill you’re longing for, and how can you make it last? Inside Buddha’s Bedroom, you’ll discover how the essential Buddhist teachings of mindfulness and awakening can be applied to your love life—showing that true passion absolutely is sustainable, if you’re willing to shift your perspective. By exploring your deepest desires and expectations, and also learning to see your partner as they really are, without the need for them to change, you’ll be able to create a deep and mindfully loving connection for a fabulous relationship. And with these spiritually scintillating tips and techniques, you’ll have the keys to igniting and sustaining all the thrill, intimacy, and sensuality you seek. About the author: Sharp, frank, and fearless, Cheryl Fraser, PhD, is a Buddhist psychologist and sought-after relationship expert. She has helped thousands of couples jump-start their love life and create passion that lasts a lifetime. A highly successful and awarded Fulbright scholar, she has conducted extensive research on sexual behavior and what causes love relationships to succeed or fail. With her groundwork, she created the Become Passion online workshop for couples. She has a thriving private practice in sex and couples therapy. A former talk radio host, Cheryl is a dynamic guest expert for television and radio, appearing on multiple programs, including The Experts, CBC Marketplace, Air America, the Loving Well podcast, and many more. As a columnist for Mindful and Best Health magazines, Cheryl explores love, sex, relationships, and the human experience. Her approach to life and to helping others is based in her practice of meditation and Buddhism, which she has studied for twenty-five years in both the Tibetan and Theravaden traditions. She was given permission to teach by her root teacher Namgyal Rinpoche, and she is resident meditation teacher for Island Dharma. Her work is encapsulated in the teaching of Mindful Loving, where she brings the Buddha’s teachings into the bedroom. When Cheryl is not in India, Tibet, or at a three-month silent Buddhist meditation retreat, she lives on Vancouver Island, BC, Canada, with her man and their menagerie, practicing the passion she preaches. www.drcherylfraser.com

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Thomas M. Sterner author of Fully Engaged: Using the Practicing Mind in Daily Life. About the book: To be fully engaged in life means that we have clear goals as well as the focus and skills to accomplish those goals with ease and a sense of calm awareness. In his first book, The Practicing Mind, which remains a bestseller in its category, Thomas Sterner set out clear guidelines for developing focus and discipline to achieve any life goal. As Tom traveled and spoke about the book, he kept track of the questions readers and participants at his seminars asked. The answers to those questions — or more accurately, the exploration of those questions — became the basis of Fully Engaged. This new book explores specific techniques, such as thought awareness training and setting goals with accurate data, and demonstrates how using these techniques will not only help you reach your objectives, but will keep you engaged in each moment of your life, throughout the process of accomplishing those goals. Being thus engaged will result in less stress and more satisfaction in every aspect of life. About the author: Thomas M. Sterner is the founder and CEO of the Practicing Mind Institute. As a successful entrepreneur, he is considered an expert in Present Moment Functioning, or PMF™. He is a popular and in-demand speaker and coach who works with high-performance industry groups and individuals, including athletes, helping them to operate effectively in high-stress situations so that they can break through to new levels of mastery. Prior to writing the bestseller The Practicing Mind, he served as chief concert piano technician for a major performing arts center, preparing instruments for the most demanding performances. An accomplished musician and composer, he has also worked in the visual arts and as a recording studio engineer. In his downtime Tom is a private pilot, avid sailor, and proficient golfer. He lives in Wilmington, Delaware, and enjoys spending time with his two daughters and in his recording studio.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Candace V. Love PhD (PART 2) author of No More Narcissists!: How to Stop Choosing Self-Absorbed Men and Find the Love You Deserve About the book: Why do some women date, or even marry, narcissistic men—over and over? In this provocative book, a clinical psychologist and expert in narcissism offers 7 secrets to help women finally break free from their attraction to narcissistic men. Do you keep finding yourself in relationships with narcissistic men? Is your boyfriend or husband solely focused on fulfilling their own needs and unable to see things from your perspective? If you’re tired of dealing with a self-absorbed partner and are ready to be treated with kindness, respect, and sensitivity, this book is for you. In No More Narcissists!, psychologist Candace Love provides a road map for women to finally get the love they deserve. Using skills based in cognitive behavioral and schema therapy, you’ll gain an understanding of why you’re attracted to narcissistic men, how you can avoid being drawn in by a narcissist’s initial charm and magnetism, and how to heal so you can finally move on to healthy relationships. You’ll find out how the basic principles of schema theory—core beliefs about ourselves and our environment that we acquire in childhood and adolescence—can play an important role in why you’re attracted to narcissists and seek them out. Also included are targeted exercises and techniques that will encourage you to examine your past relationships and take meaningful steps to promote self-care and healing. Isn’t it time you broke the cycle of hurt, frustration, and pain that comes with loving a narcissist? This book will show you how to let go of these destructive relationships once and for all, love yourself unconditionally, and find the love you deserve. About the author: As a licensed clinical psychologist, Candace V. Love, PhD, is passionate about helping women avoid narcissistic relationships. As founder and president of North Shore Behavioral Medicine, which has offices in downtown Chicago and Grayslake, IL, Love uses evidence-based techniques derived from cognitive behavioral therapies, including mindfulness and schema therapy. Much of her spare time is divided between the least narcissistic of creatures—namely animals. She enjoys riding horses and rehabilitating feral cats in the woods behind her home, and indulging in the next foodie find—whether it be a gourmet meal, vintage wine, or craft beer.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Bruce Weinstein PhD (PART 2) author of The Good Ones: Ten Crucial Qualities of High-Character Employees Our chat will include a discussion about how to evaluate the Presidential candidates using the information in The Good Ones. Does character matter? About the book: Employers look for two things when hiring or promoting people: knowledge and skill. They rarely, if ever, consider character. Yet character is the key to extraordinary business success. The Good Ones presents ten crucial qualities of high-character employees, qualities that enhance employee satisfaction, client relationships, and the bottom line. You’ll read stories from managers and employees across the U.S. and beyond who reveal how honesty, courage, loyalty, and patience have helped their organizations maintain an edge over the competition. Each chapter is devoted to a single quality of character and ends with questions employers can use to hire and promote the Good Ones — people who are consistently honest, accountable, fair, and grateful. Whether you’re looking to bring new people into your organization or seeking a job or promotion yourself, The Good Ones will help you appreciate in practical terms why character is the missing link to excellence. About the author: Dr. Bruce Weinstein, helps organizations hire and promote high-character people. Known as The Ethics Guy, Bruce is the author of Ethical Intelligence and Is It Still Cheating If I Don’t Get Caught? An in-demand speaker, his business clients have included the Home Depot, Northrop Grumman, and the National Football League, as well as nonprofit organizations, universities, and the military. He lives in New York City.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Arthur Ciaramicoli, EdD, PhD (part 3) author of The Stress Solution: Using Empathy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to Reduce Anxiety and Develop Resilience. Our conversation is specifically focused on prejudice and bias and the link to increased stress. About the book: Therapeutic tools for fighting the anxiety, fear, and depression caused by stress “We work too much, sleep too little, love with half a heart, and wonder why we are unhappy and unhealthy,” writes clinical psychologist Arthur Ciaramicoli. In The Stress Solution, Ciaramicoli provides readers with simple, realistic, powerful techniques for using empathy and cognitive behavioral therapy to perceive situations accurately, correct distorted thinking, and trigger our own neurochemistry to produce calm, focused energy. He developed this approach over thirty-five years of working with clients struggling with depression, anxiety, and addictions. Over and over again, he has helped sufferers overcome old hurts and combat performance anxiety, fears, and excessive worry. Ciaramicoli’s pioneering approach offers new promise to readers facing a variety of stress-based concerns. About the author: Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, Ed.D., Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who has been treating clients for more than 35 years. He is the Chief Medical Officer of Soundmindz.org a popular mental health site. He is also a member of the American Psychological Association and the Massachusetts Psycho-logical Association. Currently in private practice, Dr. Ciaramicoli has been on the faculty of Harvard Medical School for several years, lecturer for the American Cancer Society, Chief Psychologist at Metrowest Medical Center, and director of the Metrowest Counseling Center and of the Alternative Medicine division of Metrowest Wellness Center in Framingham, Massachusetts. Dr. Ciaramicoli is the author of The Stress Solution: How Using Empathy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy decreases Anxiety and increases Resilience (New World Library, 2016),The Curse of the Capable: The Hidden Challenges to a Balanced, Healthy, High Achieving Life(Wiley, 2010), Performance Addiction: The Dangerous New Syndrome and How to Stop It from Ruining Your Life (Wiley 2004) and The Power of Empathy: A Practical Guide to Creating Intimacy, Self-Understanding, and Lasting Love (Dutton 2000), which is now published in 7 languages. His first book, Treatment of Abuse and Addiction, A Holistic Approach (Jason Aronson, 1997) was selected as Book of the Month by The Psychotherapy Book News. He is also the coauthor of Beyond the Influence: Understanding and Defeating Alcoholism(Bantam 2000). Dr. Ciaramicoli lives in a suburb of Boston with his wife of 37 years. His newsletter, blog comments and contact information are available at his web site,www.BalanceYourSuccess.com. You can follow his daily insights at www.twitter.com/docapc.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Gracie X author of Wide Open: My Adventures in Polyamory, Open Marriage & Loving on My Own Terms About the book: At a time when society no longer imposes many sexual taboos, why is open marriage still considered beyond the pale? Written by Gracie X, Wide Open is an enthusiastic, honest, and sometimes raw account of one woman’s experience living polyamorously within the context of her average American family. Gracie X—a suburban mother of two—has been married to her loving husband, Hank, for 25 years. The problem is that their once-vibrant sex life has shriveled to nothing. Meanwhile, she has fallen in love with another man, for whom she has an overwhelming physical yearning. Frustrated and conflicted but determined not to give up her hard-won home life and wonderful husband, she is desperate for a creative solution. Can she somehow keep both men in her life without resorting to divorce or dishonesty? A friend introduces Gracie to polyamory: loving and being faithful to more than one person at a time. “Poly,” it turns out, is a whole new world, with dedicated counselors, parties, and dating sites. Convincing Hank ended up being the easy part: he quickly found a girlfriend and accepted Gracie’s terms. Their children, although upset at first, adjusted to having their parents’ “special friends” around, and having Hank and his girlfriend in one duplex, with Gracie and her new boyfriend, Oz, next-door, seemed like an inspired solution. But would trying to go poly create as many problems as it was trying to solve? In her candid and provocative memoir, Wide Open, Gracie details the years she has spent exploring the poly lifestyle and creating her “chosen family.” A fiercely intelligent feminist, she challenges traditional ideas about monogamy, fidelity, and sexuality. From swinger parties and strip clubs to sex toys and pornography, this is an edgy and thought-provoking read. Yet erotica and tenderness share space here, with Gracie’s true love for both Hank and Oz—as well as her two children—coming through very clearly. Wide Open reveals—with humor, integrity and heart—how one woman blended love, sex and marriage in unconventional ways and found the fulfillment she was looking for. About the author: Gracie X is a writer, actress, and director. She lives in Northern California. Find out more about Gracie at http://GracieX.com, and connect with her online: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GracieXauthor Twitter: https://twitter.com/GracieXauthor YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrpUKF87ojhzmV4uVNNyGAA

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Randy J. Paterson (PART 2) author of How to Be Miserable: 40 Strategies You Already Use About the book: In How to Be Miserable, psychologist Randy Paterson outlines 40 specific behaviors and habits, which—if followed—are sure to lead to a lifetime of unhappiness. On the other hand, if you do the opposite, you may yet join the ranks of happy people everywhere! There are stacks upon stacks of self-help books that will promise you love, happiness, and a fabulous life. But how can you pinpoint the exact behaviors that cause you to be miserable in the first place? Sometimes when we’re depressed, or just sad or unhappy, our instincts tell us to do the opposite of what we should—such as focusing on the negative, dwelling on what we can’t change, isolating ourselves from friends and loved ones, eating junk food, or overindulging in alcohol. Sound familiar? This tongue-in-cheek guide will help you identify the behaviors that make you unhappy and discover how you—and only you—are holding yourself back from a life of contentment. You’ll learn to spot the tried-and-true traps that increase feelings of dissatisfaction, foster a lack of motivation, and detract from our quality of life—as well as ways to avoid them. So, get ready to live the life you want (or not?) This fun, irreverent guide will light the way. About the author: Randy J. Paterson, PhD, is director of Changeways Clinic, a private psychotherapy practice in Vancouver, BC, Canada. He is author of The Assertiveness Workbook and Your Depression Map, and he conducts training programs for professionals on evidence-based treatment. Through Changeways Clinic, Paterson presents lectures and workshops internationally on topics including mental health policy, cognitive behavioral therapy, the nature and treatment of depression and anxiety disorders, and strategies for private practice management. He is the 2008 recipient of the Canadian Psychological Association’s Distinguished Practitioner Award. For more information on Paterson, his presentations and workshops, or Changeways Clinic, visit www.changeways.com. To view Paterson’s blog on psychological and practice issues, please visit www.psychologysalon.com.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Candace V. Love author of No More Narcissists!: How to Stop Choosing Self-Absorbed Men and Find the Love You Deserve About the book: Why do some women date, or even marry, narcissistic men—over and over? In this provocative book, a clinical psychologist and expert in narcissism offers 7 secrets to help women finally break free from their attraction to narcissistic men. Do you keep finding yourself in relationships with narcissistic men? Is your boyfriend or husband solely focused on fulfilling their own needs and unable to see things from your perspective? If you’re tired of dealing with a self-absorbed partner and are ready to be treated with kindness, respect, and sensitivity, this book is for you. In No More Narcissists!, psychologist Candace Love provides a road map for women to finally get the love they deserve. Using skills based in cognitive behavioral and schema therapy, you’ll gain an understanding of why you’re attracted to narcissistic men, how you can avoid being drawn in by a narcissist’s initial charm and magnetism, and how to heal so you can finally move on to healthy relationships. You’ll find out how the basic principles of schema theory—core beliefs about ourselves and our environment that we acquire in childhood and adolescence—can play an important role in why you’re attracted to narcissists and seek them out. Also included are targeted exercises and techniques that will encourage you to examine your past relationships and take meaningful steps to promote self-care and healing. Isn’t it time you broke the cycle of hurt, frustration, and pain that comes with loving a narcissist? This book will show you how to let go of these destructive relationships once and for all, love yourself unconditionally, and find the love you deserve. About the author: As a licensed clinical psychologist, Candace V. Love, PhD, is passionate about helping women avoid narcissistic relationships. As founder and president of North Shore Behavioral Medicine, which has offices in downtown Chicago and Grayslake, IL, Love uses evidence-based techniques derived from cognitive behavioral therapies, including mindfulness and schema therapy. Much of her spare time is divided between the least narcissistic of creatures—namely animals. She enjoys riding horses and rehabilitating feral cats in the woods behind her home, and indulging in the next foodie find—whether it be a gourmet meal, vintage wine, or craft beer.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, EdD, PhD author of The Stress Solution: Using Empathy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to Reduce Anxiety and Develop Resilience. This is part 2 of our chat about his book. About the book: Therapeutic tools for fighting the anxiety, fear, and depression caused by stress “We work too much, sleep too little, love with half a heart, and wonder why we are unhappy and unhealthy,” writes clinical psychologist Arthur Ciaramicoli. In The Stress Solution, Ciaramicoli provides readers with simple, realistic, powerful techniques for using empathy and cognitive behavioral therapy to perceive situations accurately, correct distorted thinking, and trigger our own neurochemistry to produce calm, focused energy. He developed this approach over thirty-five years of working with clients struggling with depression, anxiety, and addictions. Over and over again, he has helped sufferers overcome old hurts and combat performance anxiety, fears, and excessive worry. Ciaramicoli’s pioneering approach offers new promise to readers facing a variety of stress-based concerns. About the author: Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, Ed.D., Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who has been treating clients for more than 35 years. He is the Chief Medical Officer of Soundmindz.org a popular mental health site. He is also a member of the American Psychological Association and the Massachusetts Psycho-logical Association. Currently in private practice, Dr. Ciaramicoli has been on the faculty of Harvard Medical School for several years, lecturer for the American Cancer Society, Chief Psychologist at Metrowest Medical Center, and director of the Metrowest Counseling Center and of the Alternative Medicine division of Metrowest Wellness Center in Framingham, Massachusetts. Dr. Ciaramicoli is the author of The Stress Solution: How Using Empathy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy decreases Anxiety and increases Resilience (New World Library, 2016), The Curse of the Capable: The Hidden Challenges to a Balanced, Healthy, High Achieving Life (Wiley, 2010), Performance Addiction: The Dangerous New Syndrome and How to Stop It from Ruining Your Life (Wiley 2004) and The Power of Empathy: A Practical Guide to Creating Intimacy, Self-Understanding, and Lasting Love (Dutton 2000), which is now published in 7 languages. His first book, Treatment of Abuse and Addiction, A Holistic Approach (Jason Aronson, 1997) was selected as Book of the Month by The Psychotherapy Book News. He is also the coauthor of Beyond the Influence: Understanding and Defeating Alcoholism (Bantam 2000). Dr. Ciaramicoli lives in a suburb of Boston with his wife of 37 years. His newsletter, blog comments and contact information are available at his web site, www.BalanceYourSuccess.com. You can follow his daily insights at www.twitter.com/docapc.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Kelly Skeen co-author of Communication Skills for Teens: How to Listen, Express and Connect for Success. As teens head back to school, we think it’s a good time to revisit and reinforce healthy communication skills. The framed needlepoint in the photo was a birthday gift to Kelly from her amazingly thoughtful and creative friend, Ari, who ordered it on Etsy. It was made by a woman in Belgium! About the book: Communication is an essential life skill that every teen must learn. Based on the New Harbinger classic, Messages, this book will teach you the necessary skills—such as assertiveness, active listening, and compassion—to become an effective communicator for life. In an age of social media, texting, and ever-evolving technology, it’s easy to forget how to engage in real, face-to-face communication, a critical skill for your future success! As you become more connected to your smartphone and the internet, your ability to connect in person may diminish. But technology doesn’t replace the need for effective communication skills. In fact, successful personal and professional relationships are dependent upon connecting with people face-to-face. Communication Skills for Teens provides the guidance you need to become a better communicator and succeed in all areas of life. You’ll also learn tons of essential life skills, including active listening, assertiveness, clarifying language, the art of an apology, compassion, interviewing skills, family communication, and more. Each chapter focuses on one key aspect of communication, offers a real teen’s perspective, and includes practical exercises to help you apply what you’ve learned in the real world—away from your computer and smartphone screens. By following the practical, skills-based tips in each chapter of this book, you’ll learn powerful communication techniques to last a lifetime. About the co-author: Kelly Skeen is an undergraduate student at Georgetown University, majoring in American Studies and minoring in Spanish and Education, Inquiry & Justice. To find out more go to www.kellyskeen.com

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is David A. Carbonell, PhD author of The Worry Trick: How Your Brain Tricks You into Expecting the Worst and What You Can Do About It About the book: Are you truly in danger or has your brain simply “tricked” you into thinking you are? In The Worry Trick, psychologist and anxiety expert David Carbonell shows how anxiety hijacks the brain and offers effective techniques to help you break the cycle of worry, once and for all. Anxiety is a powerful force. It makes us question ourselves and our decisions, causes us to worry about the future, and fills our days with dread and emotional turbulence. Based in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), this book is designed to help you break the cycle of worry. Worry convinces us there’s danger, and then tricks us into getting into fight, flight, or freeze mode—even when there is no danger. The techniques in this book, rather than encouraging you to avoid or try to resist anxiety, shows you how to see the trick that underlies your anxious thoughts, and how avoidance can backfire and make anxiety worse. If you’re ready to start observing your anxious feelings with distance and clarity—rather than getting tricked once again—this book will show you how. About the author: David Carbonell, Ph.D., is a Clinical Psychologist who specializes in the treatment of anxiety disorders. He is the founder and director of the Anxiety Treatment Center, Ltd., a small group of psychologists which offers treatment of all manner of fears and phobias at several locations in and around Chicago, and the “coach” at www.anxietycoach.com, a self help web site for people troubled by fears and phobias. Dr. Carbonell is a recognized expert in this field, and has conducted training and seminars for a variety of professional groups, including the Anxiety Disorders Association of America; the International Association of Cognitive Psychotherapy; the United Airlines Employee Assistance Program; the Rockland County and Suffolk County Psychological Associations in New York; the Illinois Alcohol and Other Drug Abuse Professional Certification Association; the Illinois Employee Assistance Professionals Association; the Illinois Psychological Association, the New York Psychological Association; and Northwestern University Medical School, among others. He regularly offers a day-long workshop for professional therapists on the treatment of anxiety disorders at locations around the country, sponsored by Pesi Healthcare, Inc. Dr. Carbonell is the author of Panic Attacks Workbook (Ulysses Press, 2004) and The Worry Trick (New Harbinger, 2016). He is a member of the American Psychological Association; the Anxiety Disorders Association of America; the Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies; the Association for Contextual and Behavioral Science; the International Association for Cognitive Psychotherapy; the Illinois Psychological Association; and the Obsessive Compulsive Foundation. He is licensed as a clinical psychologist by the States of Illinois and New York.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Judith Belmont, MS author of Embrace Your Greatness: 50 Ways to Build Unshakable Self-Esteem About the book: It’s time to start feeling good about yourself! In this go-to guide, a licensed professional counselor offers 50 quick tips and tools to help you overcome self-doubt, silence your inner critic, be assertive, boost your self-esteem, and embrace your greatness. In our image-obsessed world, it’s easy to compare yourself to friends, celebrities, and models. Social media has skewed our perception of reality by only offering images of people at their best. But the truth is that most people struggle with self-criticism and self-doubt—at least some of the time. So, how can you stop paying attention to your inner critic and start focusing on what makes you truly great? In Embrace Your Greatness, you’ll find powerful—yet incredibly simple—tools grounded in mindfulness, acceptance, self-compassion, and positive psychology to help you start feeling good about yourself. The book includes unique and engaging activities and exercises to help you put a stop to that nagging inner critic, overcome perfectionism, and develop lasting self-confidence. You’ll also discover ways to be more assertive, develop healthy relationships that support a healthy you, and cultivate an unshakable sense of optimism about yourself and your life. If you need a quick confidence boost, this fun guide offers 50 ways to nix your nagging inner critic and start loving who you are. About the author: Judith Belmont, MS, LPC, has been a psychotherapist, motivational speaker, workplace wellness consultant, and mental health coach. Her message of positivity, healthy communication, stress resilience, and self-empowerment has reached thousands nationwide through her books, consulting, and interactive presentations. She is author of seven mental health and wellness books that offer therapists and their clients, as well as self-help readers, practical solutions to deal with common problems such as low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and relationship issues. In her books, she offers practical skill-building resources using experiential activities, visualizations, handouts, and worksheets. Belmont is founder of Belmont Wellness (www.belmontwellness.com) where she offers a variety of mental health and wellness presentations, as well as personal and professional coaching. Her mission to share important life skills and promote self-empowerment and positivity is followed by a wide audience due to her active social media presence on various sites, such as Facebook and Pinterest.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Cheryl M. Bradshaw, MA author of How to Like Yourself: A Teen’s Guide to Quieting Your Inner Critic and Building Lasting Self-Esteem About the book: Don’t let your inner critic get in the way of being confident! How to Like Yourself offers a quirky, inspiring, and practical guide to help you overcome feelings of self-criticism, improve self-esteem, and be the true star in your life. With all the pressures of school, friends, and dating, you’re especially vulnerable to low self-esteem in your teen years. But often, the biggest threat to your confidence is your own inner critic—whose unrelenting negativity can result in feelings of inadequacy, depression, and anxiety. This must-have guide offers real ways to help you fight back, be kind to yourself, and move forward with confidence. Inside, you’ll learn the importance of self-forgiveness, accepting your faults, and how to focus on the things that make you awesome! You’ll also learn strategies for defeating the dreaded ICK—the inner critic know-it-all who keeps knocking you down—and how to escape the common thought traps that hold you back from feeling good about yourself. This book unlocks the mystery of the most important relationship you will ever have—the one with yourself! So, get ready to find your true inner voice. A kinder, gentler one that will support you as you reach for your goals and create the fabulous life you were meant to live! About the author: Cheryl has worked as a counsellor at Sheridan College and currently works at the University of Guelph as a counsellor/therapist for registered students, and currently also has a private practice in counseling, psychotherapy, and life coaching in the heart of Waterdown, Ontario. With a Bachelor’s of Education and a background in teaching, as well as a Master of Arts in Counseling Psychology, she specializes in working with young people, anyone experiencing depression, anxiety, stress, grief, loss of direction, or other life concerns, and enjoys working with anyone who feels a connection and fit with her.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Randy J. Paterson, PhD author of How To Be Miserable: 40 Strategies You Already Use About the book: In How to Be Miserable, psychologist Randy Paterson outlines 40 specific behaviors and habits, which—if followed—are sure to lead to a lifetime of unhappiness. On the other hand, if you do the opposite, you may yet join the ranks of happy people everywhere! There are stacks upon stacks of self-help books that will promise you love, happiness, and a fabulous life. But how can you pinpoint the exact behaviors that cause you to be miserable in the first place? Sometimes when we’re depressed, or just sad or unhappy, our instincts tell us to do the opposite of what we should—such as focusing on the negative, dwelling on what we can’t change, isolating ourselves from friends and loved ones, eating junk food, or overindulging in alcohol. Sound familiar? This tongue-in-cheek guide will help you identify the behaviors that make you unhappy and discover how you—and only you—are holding yourself back from a life of contentment. You’ll learn to spot the tried-and-true traps that increase feelings of dissatisfaction, foster a lack of motivation, and detract from our quality of life—as well as ways to avoid them. So, get ready to live the life you want (or not?) This fun, irreverent guide will light the way. About the author: Randy J. Paterson, PhD, is director of Changeways Clinic, a private psychotherapy practice in Vancouver, BC, Canada. He is author of The Assertiveness Workbook and Your Depression Map, and he conducts training programs for professionals on evidence-based treatment. Through Changeways Clinic, Paterson presents lectures and workshops internationally on topics including mental health policy, cognitive behavioral therapy, the nature and treatment of depression and anxiety disorders, and strategies for private practice management. He is the 2008 recipient of the Canadian Psychological Association’s Distinguished Practitioner Award. For more information on Paterson, his presentations and workshops, or Changeways Clinic, visit www.changeways.com. To view Paterson’s blog on psychological and practice issues, please visit www.psychologysalon.com.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Anese Cavanaugh author of Contagious Culture: Show Up, Set The Tone & Intentionally Create An Organization That Thrives About the book: GET INSPIRED. GET EXCITED. GET RESULTS. A proven approach to corporate culture that’s positively contagious You are about to enter a new era of leadership. With more competiton, more connectedness, and more opportunities than ever before, this exciting new era demands a workplace culture that is collaborative, productive, energized, and contagious. A culture that encourages extraordinary growth and innovation. A culture that starts with you―showing up, setting the tone, and lighting the fire… This book is about answering that call and setting yourself up for success. It’s about improving your leadership presence and your impact, not just on others but yourself. It’s about creating the space you need to share your vision, state your intention, and jump-start your team. It’s about working yourself over―from the inside out―so you can become the strong, effective, inspiring leader you know you can be. This is Contagious Culture, a game-changing guide to transforming corporate culture from within, developed by the award-winning creator of The IEP Method to strengthen your “Intentional Energetic Presence.” This is more than a leadership book―this is your future calling. Award-winning organizational advisor Anese Cavanaugh reveals the secrets of IEP―Intentional Energetic Presence―for transforming your workplace and your life. The key to any company’s success lies in its culture. This game-changing guide shows you how to shape and revitalize this culture―by setting the tone, engaging the team, and creating a dynamic working environment that encourages growth, productivity, and innovation. It all starts with you… Using the book’s unique IEP Method, you can: Be the kind of leader people want to follow―not have to follow Craft your intention―and make a real impact Unleash your energy―and watch it spread like wildfire Unlock greater collaboration in your teams―and greater leadership in your people Show up for Others―by setting yourself up for success Bring out the best in everyone―including yourself Create a contagious work culture that people want to catch! With these proven step-by-step techniques, you can take control of the culture you work in and build a healthier, more functional environment―from the inside out. You’ll find helpful transformative tools and exercises for improving collaborations, opening communications, and implementing changes. You’ll discover the best methods for handling the toughest challenges, whether it’s hiring and firing, strategizing and organizing, busyness or burnout. Best of all, you’ll learn how to enhance your “Intentional Energetic Presence” (IEP) so you’ll always be fully present, purposeful, and prepared to share your vision with infectious energy and enthusiasm. Contagious Culture is so much more than a leadership guide. It’s a complete cultural mind-shift that’s not only exciting for you and your team―it’s absolutely, positively contagious. About the author: Anese Cavanaugh is the creator of the IEP Method (Intentional Energetic Presence) as well as a leadership and collaboration advisor, strategist, and thinking partner for business leaders in the design, service and innovation spaces. Through her speaking, writing and creative leadership programs, people learn how to optimize their leadership and presence, bringing their best selves to the table for greater collaboration, impact, and cultural success. Follow her on Twitter @anesecavanaugh. Anese Cavanaugh is a dynamic, highly sought after speaker who has been called “transformational.” Anese has appeared on stages across the country—Stanford University, the Inc. Women’s Summit, the Education Equals Partnership Annual Conference, and many others—all in service of Showing Up well and creating positive impact in the world. In addition to appearing in publications like The Huffington Post, CEO.com, and the NY Times, Anese writes regularly for Inc.com in her column “Showing Up”, has just released The IEP Survival Guide: First Aid for Your Presence”, and has a book due to release in late 2015 with McGraw-Hill.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Sam Chase author of Yoga and the Pursuit of Happiness: A Guide to Finding Joy in Unexpected Places About the book: Enlightenment isn’t a strange, mystical, or faraway place. It’s a fundamental human experience available to us all in different ways and in different moments. Learn how the ancient philosophy of yoga, modern neuroscience, and positive psychology can help you discover your life’s meaning and purpose, rewire your brain, and uncover lasting happiness and joy. Everyone is looking for happiness, but very few really know where to find it. Maybe it’s that house you’ve been dreaming of buying, or a new car, or the perfect relationship? Or maybe it’s a grand, epic revelation about the meaning of life? But when will that revelation come to you, and how long should you wait? And what if happiness isn’t something you achieve or obtain, but how you respond to the conditions of your life? After all, yogis can find peace and joy even when life is painful and unpleasant. In Yoga and the Pursuit of Happiness, you’ll discover that lasting happiness is already at your fingertips—in the small, everyday moments inherently infused with purpose and meaning. The philosophy of yoga—rather than the poses and postures—boils down to one fundamental process: overcoming suffering by coming to know ourselves and aligning our actions with our own intrinsic sense of spiritual purpose. And yoga gives us the tools to address two basic existential questions: Who am I? What should I do? Meanwhile, positive psychology and neuroscience show us how our actions are constantly rewiring our brain in helpful ways—which points to happiness as something we must practice and carry out each day. Happiness is, simply put, something we do. In this unique, lighthearted guide, celebrated yoga instructor Sam Chase blends ancient wisdom from the Bhagavad Gita and Yoga Sutras with his own personal journey of enlightenment to show you how to deepen your understanding of yourself and the world around you, end the cycle of materialism and greed that can get in the way of cultivating stillness of mind, and achieve lasting well-being. About the author: Sam Chase is co-owner of a Yoga to the People studio in New York City, where he leads weekly yoga programs for everyday people and diverse organizations, including New York University and the United Nations. He received his master’s degree at Harvard’s A.R.T. Institute, and certificates in yoga and positive psychology from the Kripalu Center. Chase resides in Brooklyn, NY.

About the book: Therapeutic tools for fighting the anxiety, fear, and depression caused by stress “We work too much, sleep too little, love with half a heart, and wonder why we are unhappy and unhealthy,” writes clinical psychologist Arthur Ciaramicoli. In The Stress Solution, Ciaramicoli provides readers with simple, realistic, powerful techniques for using empathy and cognitive behavioral therapy to perceive situations accurately, correct distorted thinking, and trigger our own neurochemistry to produce calm, focused energy. He developed this approach over thirty-five years of working with clients struggling with depression, anxiety, and addictions. Over and over again, he has helped sufferers overcome old hurts and combat performance anxiety, fears, and excessive worry. Ciaramicoli’s pioneering approach offers new promise to readers facing a variety of stress-based concerns. About the author: Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, Ed.D., Ph.D., is a licensed clinical psychologist who has been treating clients for more than 35 years. He is the Chief Medical Officer of Soundmindz.org a popular mental health site. He is also a member of the American Psychological Association and the Massachusetts Psycho-logical Association. Currently in private practice, Dr. Ciaramicoli has been on the faculty of Harvard Medical School for several years, lecturer for the American Cancer Society, Chief Psychologist at Metrowest Medical Center, and director of the Metrowest Counseling Center and of the Alternative Medicine division of Metrowest Wellness Center in Framingham, Massachusetts. In addition to treating patients, Dr. Ciaramicoli has lectured at Harvard Health Services, Boston College Counseling Center, the Space Telescope Science Institute in Baltimore as well as being a consultant to several major corporations in the Boston area. Dr. Ciaramicoli is also a seasoned media expert.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guests are Linda and Charlie Bloom authors of Happily Ever After…and 39 Other Myths about Love: Breaking Through to the Relationship of Your Dreams. About the book: Bust the Myths to Build a Great Relationship According to bestselling authors and relationship counselors Linda and Charlie Bloom, accepting common myths such as “couples with great relationships don’t fight” or “little things aren’t worth getting upset over” can prevent you from building the strong relationship you hope for. This book offers compelling stories and valuable suggestions for replacing myths with realistic expectations, equipping you with behavior and communication guidelines that will enhance and strengthen your intimate relationship. With the Blooms’ strong yet flexible approach to love, you’ll discover a new openness in which mutual understanding can thrive. About the authors: Linda Bloom, LCSW, and Charlie Bloom, MSW, are bestselling authors and the founders and codirectors of Bloomwork. They have lectured and taught seminars on relationships throughout the United States and the world. They have been married since 1972.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Hugh G. Byrne, PhD author of The Here and Now Habit: How Mindfulness Can Help You Break Unhealthy Habits Once and for All. He is returning for a second time to discuss part 2 of his book, putting wisdom into practice. About the book: Bad habits can take a hefty toll on your health and happiness. In The Here-and-Now Habit, mindfulness expert Hugh Byrne provides powerful practices based in mindfulness and neuroscience to help you rewire your brain and finally break the habits that are holding you back from a meaningful life. Have you found yourself doing something and thinking, Why do I keep doing this? We all have an unhealthy habit—or two, or three. Yours may be as simple as wasting time on the Internet, constantly checking your e-mail, or spending too much time in front of the TV. Or, it may be more serious, like habitual drinking, emotional overeating, constant self-criticism, or chronic worrying. Whatever your harmful habit is—you have the power to break it. The Here-and-Now-Habit provides proven-effective techniques to help you stop existing on autopilot and start living in the here and now. You’ll learn how to cultivate mindfulness to calm and focus your mind, be aware of thoughts without identifying with them or believing they are true, deal with difficult emotions, and clarify your own intentions regarding unhealthy habits by asking yourself, What do I want? How important is it to me to make this change? By learning to pay attention to your thoughts and actions in the moment, you’ll discover how to let go of old patterns and create healthier habits and ways of living that will make you feel good about yourself. And when you feel good about you, you can do just about anything. About the author: Hugh G. Byrne, PhD, is a guiding teacher with the Insight Meditation Community of Washington (IMCW), and cofounder of the Mindfulness Training Institute of Washington. He has worked extensively in the fields of human rights and social justice, and is committed to advocating the benefits of mindfulness and other contemplative practices to help relieve the suffering of the world. He teaches classes, retreats, and workshops in the United States and internationally. Byrne resides in Silver Spring, MD.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Christine Hassler author of Expectation Hangover: Free Yourself from Your Past, Change Your Present & Get What You Really Want About the book: We all face setbacks we cannot control, yet we often forget that we have a choice about how to handle those setbacks. The Expectation Hangovers we feel in the wake of disappointment, failure, or loss can become doorways to tremendous opportunities and life-changing gifts. Managing your expectations is not about lowering your standards. Master coach Christine Hassler explains how to pursue the right goals for the right reasons and also what to do when things don’t work out as expected. By the time you finish this book, you’ll understand why setbacks happen and have a clear course of action to pursue your dreams. About the author: Christine Hassler left her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue a life she could be passionate about . . . but it did not come easily. After being inspired by her own unexpected challenges and experiences, she realized her journey was indeed her destination. In 2005, she wrote the first guidebook written exclusively for young women, entitled 20 Something 20 Everything. Christine’s second book, The 20 Something Manifesto written for men and women stems from her experience coaching twenty-something’s. Her newest book Expectation Hangover: Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love and Life is the guidebook for how to treat disappointment on the emotional, mental, behavioral and spiritual levels. Today, she supports individuals in discovering the answers to the questions: “Who Am I, What do I want, and How do I get it?” Christine is a Life Coach with a counseling emphasis known for catalyzing radical self-reflection while offering practical direction. She is passionate about busting the myth that life is about living by a checklist and having it all figured out. Christine believes we all deserve and are capable of discovering our passion, pursuing our dreams, and making an impact on the world. Christine began her evolution as a Gen Y expert with a discussion group for quarter-lifers in Los Angeles struggling with questions about themselves and their lives. As she continued her investigation of herself and others, she began to craft a roadmap for life for people of all ages which includes discovery, self-acceptance, self-forgiveness and clarity.

About the book: In this landmark book, world-renowned Harvard negotiation expert Daniel Shapiro introduces a groundbreaking, step-by-step method to resolve your most difficult conflicts. Find out how to successfully resolve your most emotionally charged conflicts. This indispensable guide reveals the five hidden emotional forces that strain your relations and block agreement: vertigo, repetition compulsion, taboos, assault on the sacred, and identity politics. The moment you feel attacked, these forces transform your conflict into an adversarial battle, turning even a straightforward disagreement into an emotional uproar. In Negotiating the Nonnegotiable, you will learn a powerful, proven approach to overcome these forces, reconcile your relations, and reach agreement in even your most challenging personal and professional disputes. About the author: Dr. Daniel Shapiro is world-renowned for his work in the field of negotiation and conflict resolution. He founded and directs the Harvard International Negotiation Program, which pioneers innovative strategies and teaching methodologies to address the human dimensions of conflict resolution. His advice is regularly sought by everyone from heads of state and corporate executives to struggling families and couples. Dr. Shapiro believes that we are all negotiating every day, whether in business, government, or at home with our families. He has developed new methods to deal with the heart of conflict: the emotional dimension. His strategies have helped thousands of people deal more effectively with the most important negotiations in their lives, allowing them to reach higher levels of success.

Last Friday, I had the privilege of speaking to students in Ms. Rhynes’ English class from Oakland Tech High School for the 3rd Annual Literacy Field Trip hosted at Barnes and Noble in Emeryville, California. Barbara Tavres, the Community Business Development Manager at B&N, and Ms. Rhynes partnered together several years ago because they both believe in the power of reading and the written word. Each student is given a $75 gift card to purchase books. Their preference was to have my co-author and daughter, Kelly Skeen, speak to the students about our book Communication Skills for Teens: How to Listen, Express and Connect for Success. But she was in Washington DC studying for final exams, so they got stuck with me. Kelly and I decided that I should present the foundational chapter of our book, “How to Really Listen,” since listening well is the key component for successful relationships in all areas of our lives. The students got really involved when we discussed common blocks to listening. In honor of this event, this week on Relationships 2.0 I will re-broadcast my chat with my co-author and daughter, Kelly Skeen, about Communication Skills for Teens: How to Listen, Express and Connect for Success. About the book: Communication is an essential life skill that every teen must learn. Based on the New Harbinger classic, Messages, this book will teach you the necessary skills—such as assertiveness, active listening, and compassion—to become an effective communicator for life. In an age of social media, texting, and ever-evolving technology, it’s easy to forget how to engage in real, face-to-face communication, a critical skill for your future success! As you become more connected to your smartphone and the internet, your ability to connect in person may diminish. But technology doesn’t replace the need for effective communication skills. In fact, successful personal and professional relationships are dependent upon connecting with people face-to-face. Communication Skills for Teens provides the guidance you need to become a better communicator and succeed in all areas of life. You’ll also learn tons of essential life skills, including active listening, assertiveness, clarifying language, the art of an apology, compassion, interviewing skills, family communication, and more. Each chapter focuses on one key aspect of communication, offers a real teen’s perspective, and includes practical exercises to help you apply what you’ve learned in the real world—away from your computer and smartphone screens. By following the practical, skills-based tips in each chapter of this book, you’ll learn powerful communication techniques to last a lifetime. For more information about the book, www.kellyskeen.com

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Kate Gustin, PhD author of The No-Self Help Book: 40 Reasons to Get Over Your Self & Find Peace of Mind About the book: It’s time to get over your self! Written by a clinical psychologist and student of Eastern philosophy, this handy little guide offers a radical solution to anyone struggling with self-doubt, self-esteem, and self-defeating thoughts: “no-self help.” By breaking free of your own self-limiting beliefs, you’ll discover your infinite potential. There is an insidious, global identity theft occurring that has robbed people of their very recognition of their true selves. The culprit—indeed the mastermind of this crisis—has committed the inside job of creating and promoting the idea that we are all a separate self, which is the chief source of our daily distress and dissatisfaction. No more than a narrative of personhood pieced together from disparate neural activations, the self we believe ourselves to be in our own minds—although quite capable of being affirming, inspiring, and constructive—often spews forth a distressing flow of worry and second-guessing, blaming and shaming, regret and guilt. This book offers an antidote to this epidemic of stolen identity, isolation, and self-deprecation: no-self (a concept known in Buddhist philosophy as anatta or anatman). The No-Self Help Book turns the idea of self-improvement on its head, arguing that the key to well-being lies not in the relentless pursuit of bettering one’s self but in the recognition of the self as a false identity born in the mind. Rather than identifying with a small, relative sense of self, this book encourages you to embrace a liberating alternative—an expansive awareness that is flexible and open to experiencing life as an ongoing and ever-changing process, without attachment to personal outcomes or storylines. To help you make this leap from self to no-self, the book provides forty bite-sized chapters full of clever and inspiring insights based in positive psychology and non-duality—a philosophy that asserts there is no real separation between any of us. So, if you’re tired of “self-help” and you’re ready to explore who you are beyond the self, let The No-Self Help Book be your guide. About the author: Kate Gustin, PhD, is a clinical psychologist practicing in the San Francisco Bay Area. She received her education from Princeton University and the University of California, Berkeley; and has worked in a variety of settings over the past twenty-five years as a mental health practitioner: outpatient psychiatry, community mental health clinics, VA Hospital, college counseling services, and currently in private practice. Gustin integrates the science of positive psychology into her psychotherapy, teaching, and consultation, and leads classes and trainings for students, patients, and health care professionals.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Helene Segura author of The Inefficiency Assassin: Time Management Tactics for Working Smarter, Not Longer About the book: Slay Procrastination, Distraction, and Overwhelm! Who doesn’t want more time and energy for family, friends, and personal passions? Author Helene Segura coaches real people in the real world to operate more efficiently during the workday, so they can have a life outside it. Her engaging time management program caters to diverse learning styles, offering case studies that allow readers to self-diagnose and zero in on the strategies most appropriate for them. Anyone wanting to streamline workflow and improve productivity can employ her wonderfully doable techniques — for clearing task lists, handling reminder systems, scheduling a variety of priorities, and even managing emails and phone calls. Thanks to Segura’s astute attention to personality, The Inefficiency Assassin meets readers where they are struggling and details quick and easy-to-implement strategies to, as Segura promises, “kick chaos to the curb.” About the author: Do you want to wake up 10 years from now and lament, “I wish I’d lived a little more instead of work around the clock”? Helene Segura doesn’t want to either. That’s why she tells her time what to do – and teaches busy professionals how to do the same by slaying lost time. The author of two Amazon best-selling books, Helene has been the featured productivity expert in more than 100 media interviews. During her time management keynotes and workshops, she shares her mind-bending framework for decreasing interruptions, distractions and procrastination so that companies can spend more time generating revenue. On weekends, Helene can be found experimenting with recipes or sneaking adult beverages onto the lawn bowling court. To connect with Helene or for details about her third book, The Inefficiency Assassin: Time Management Tactics for Working Smarter, Not Longer (New World Library 2016), visit www.HeleneSegura.com.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Cara Bradley author of On The Verge: Wake Up, Show Up and Shine About the book: In the final race of her college track career, Cara Bradley beat her personal best by a remarkable six seconds. Until then Bradley had been a so-so athlete hampered by pre-race jitters and self-doubt. But on this day Bradley was buoyed by a sense of calm confidence. She set about understanding how she could replicate this experience in every area of life. She has distilled what she found into four practices, four shift strategies, and a series of gut-check reminders for moving out of over-thinking and over-doing and into being fully awake and alive– clear, bright, confident. These techniques for settling busy mind, putting body and mind in sync, and cultivating awareness and strength are simple but require practice and attention, which Bradley coaches readers to apply daily. The reward is what she calls “high definition, high voltage living,” the ability to experience what Bradley did on the track not by accident, or in only a few memorable moments but on purpose, every day. About the author: Cara Bradley, a native New Yorker and former pro-skater for Team Rollerblade®, is a lifelong teacher, mental strength coach, and entrepreneur. She is passionate about feeling awake and alive and experiencing her life fully. As the founder of Verge Yoga, Cara has been in the trenches of personal transformation and mindfulness as a teacher to thousands including CEOs and professional athletes for over three decades. She is also the founder of Mindfulness Through Movement, a non-profit offering full year programs to schools in urban Philadelphia.

This week on Relationships 2.0 my guest is Emma Seppälä PhD author of The Happiness Track: How to Apply the Science of Happiness to Accelerate Your Success About the book: A leading expert on health psychology, well-being, and resilience argues that happiness is the key to fast tracking our professional and personal success. Everyone wants to be happy and successful. And yet the pursuit of both has never been more elusive. As work and personal demands rise, we try to keep up by juggling everything better, moving faster, and doing more. While we might succeed in the short term, it comes at a cost to our well-being, relationships, and, paradoxically, our productivity. In The Happiness Track, Emma Seppala, the science director of the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education at Stanford University, explains that our inability to achieve sustainable fulfillment is tied to common but outdated notions about success. We are taught that getting ahead means doing everything that’s thrown at us (and then some) with razor-sharp focus and iron discipline; that success depends on our drive and talents; and that achievement cannot happen without stress. The Happiness Track demolishes these counter-productive theories. Drawing on the latest findings from the fields of cognitive psychology and neuroscience—research on happiness, resilience, willpower, compassion, positive stress, creativity, mindfulness—Seppala shows that finding happiness and fulfillment may, in fact, be the most productive thing we can do to thrive professionally. Filled with practical advice on how to apply these scientific findings to our daily lives, The Happiness Track is a life-changing guide to fast tracking our success and creating the anxiety-free life we want. About the author: EMMA SEPPÄLÄ is Science Director of the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education at Stanford University and a leading expert on health psychology, well-being, and resilience. Her research has been featured in the New York Times, ABC News, Forbes, the Boston Globe, U.S. News & World Report, the Huffington Post, INC, and Fast Company. She is founder of the popular online magazine Fulfillment Daily and a frequent contributor to Psychology Today, Harvard Business Review, and the Huffington Post. Her writing has also appeared in the Washington Post, Scientific American Mind, and Spirituality & Health. Seppälä consults for Fortune 500 leaders on building positive organizations. A sought-after speaker, she has addressed academic, corporate, and governmental institutions, including Google, the National Science Foundation, and the World Bank. Dedicated to applying the science of happiness to people’s lives, she taught happiness and service classes to hundreds of students, for which she was awarded Stanford University’s Lyons Award for service. Touched by the selfless dedication of veterans and the profound trauma so many bring back from war, she conducted groundbreaking research on mind-body practices for combat veterans. This research was highlighted in the documentary film Free the Mind. She holds an undergraduate degree in comparative literature from Yale University, a master’s degree in East Asian languages and cultures from Columbia University, and a PhD in psychology from Stanford University. Originally from Paris, France, she is a native speaker of French, English, and German. She also speaks Spanish and Mandarin Chinese.