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TitreDateDurée
Bypassing Your Relational Needs - Coaching Session - Jayson Gaddis - 51301 Oct 202400:25:21

In this coaching session, Jayson works with Becca, a woman navigating a relationship with a partner who doesn’t acknowledge her feelings. How should you deal with a partner who isn’t open to seeking relationship help? What should you do if your partner struggles to handle your emotions? If you're in a relationship with someone who doesn’t recognize your feelings, you won’t want to miss this powerful session.

Timestamps:

  • 6:11 - When a partner isn't on board to get help
  • 13:00 - When a partner won't recognize your feelings
  • 16:50 - Don't settle for not being met

Links:

How to Increase Your Self Worth - Coaching Session - Jayson Gaddis - 51224 Sep 202400:28:23

In this live coaching session, Jayson coaches Sharon, a woman struggling with self-worth and feelings of not being enough. How can you stop repeating untrue stories to yourself and create new associations? What’s the best way to start focusing on the ways you are enough? What are you gaining by staying in negative patterns? If you’re struggling with self-worth or feeling like you’re not enough, you won’t want to miss this inspiring coaching session.

Timestamps:

  • 6:00 - Struggling with shame
  • 10:00 - The pattern of feeling not enough
  • 15:24 - Recognizing the areas where you are enough
  • 20:28 - Creating new associations

Links:

How to Face an Addiction: Coaching Session - Jayson Gaddis - 51117 Sep 202400:25:39

In this live coaching session, Jayson coaches Susan, a woman who has identified her spending patterns as problematic. How do you know when a behavior crosses over into an addiction? How does a lack of meaning contribute to addiction? What role can healthy relationships play in helping someone escape from addiction? If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction, you won’t want to miss this inspiring coaching session.

Timestamps:

  • 4:29 - Spending addiction
  • 11:51 - How do we define addiction?
  • 14:37 - The root cause of addiction
  • 17:35 - The role of meaning
  • 22:48 - Religion

Links:

Anxious Spiritual Guy vs. Avoidant: A Live Coaching Session - Jayson Gaddis - 51010 Sep 202400:27:19

In this live coaching session, Jayson coaches Derek, an anxious man struggling with an avoidant partner. How should couples balance the need for space with the need for connection? How can you tell if your relationship concerns stem from care or fear? How do you know if couples therapy is working? Don’t miss this powerful coaching session!

Timestamps:

  • 6:09 - How to set boundaries while maintaining a relationship
  • 9:09 - Balancing the need for space and connection
  • 15:27 - Is your therapy working?
  • 21:16 - Are you working from fear or care?
  • 24:12 - Being honest with your partner

Links:

3 Upcoming Trainings to Change Your Life - Jayson Gaddis - 50927 Aug 202400:12:34

In this episode, Jayson introduces three powerful trainings designed to transform your life and relationships. 
First, explore the Communication Breakthrough Experience, where hands-on demos and live coaching sessions help you overcome communication barriers and deepen your emotional connections. 
Next, learn about Relationship Coach Training, a program that empowers you to turn your passion for personal growth and relationships into a fulfilling career, making a meaningful impact on others. 
Finally, discover Couples Coach Training, a comprehensive 9-month journey that combines cutting-edge science and experiential therapies to equip you with the skills and confidence to coach couples effectively. Whether you're seeking personal growth, a new career, or the tools to help others, these trainings offer the potential for profound change. Don't miss this opportunity to take your life to the next level!

Timestamps:
  • 2:43 - Communication Breakthrough Experience
  • 5:27 - Relationship Coach Training
  • 7:16 - Couples Coach Training

Links:

Communicate Like You Did When You Fell in Love - Jayson Gaddis - 50830 Jul 202400:16:58

Do you wish you and your partner still communicated like you did when you first fell in love? In this episode, Jayson delves into the science of infatuation—why we experience it and why it fades. Can you rekindle the magic of the early days of your relationship, or is there something even better ahead? Tune in to discover how to earn your second honeymoon stage.

Timestamps:

  • 2:48 - Infatuation
  • 6:16 - Falling out of love or working toward relational maturity?
  • 9:49 - Learning how to communicate
  • 13:48 - Earning your second honeymoon stage

Links:

Teens, Screens, and Mental Health - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 50709 Jul 202400:47:07

Jayson and Ellen delve into the complex relationship between teens, screens, and mental health. Is it okay to use screens to help kids calm down? Are teens becoming more anxious? At what age should children have their own cell phones? What societal changes are needed to protect the mental health and well-being of children and teens? How can you effectively implement boundaries at home? Tune in to find the answers to these and many more questions.

Timestamps:

  • 2:35 - Why screen time matters
  • 5:50 - The Anxious Generation
  • 9:00 - Using screens to help kids calm down
  • 17:00 - The problem with content
  • 21:00 - The problem with texting
  • 23:30 - Setting boundaries
  • 30:30 - Haidt's four recommendations
  • 33:30 - Jayson and Ellen's recommendations
  • 43:00 - Action steps

Links:

Setting Boundaries With Dysfunctional Family Members - Terri Cole - 50602 Jul 202400:35:11
In this episode, psychotherapist Terri Cole shares some creative (and funny) strategies for handling problematic family relationships.   Timestamps:
  • Why Interacting With Family Can Be So Difficult [1:30]
  • Terri Cole’s Family Experience [3:30]
  • The Importance Of Boundaries and Language With Family [7:30]
  • Examples Of Managing Family Dysfunction Successfully [9:30]
  • Strategies For Avoiding Unwanted Conversations With Family [14:30]
  • Is It Okay To Just Walk Away From Shitty Family Conversations? [23:00]
  • Taking A Break From Family And Avoiding Family Holidays Altogether [25:00]
  • When Mom And Partner Are Competing For Attention [29:00]

Links:

AMA: Phone Snooping, Sexual Trauma, Emotionless Partners - Jayson Gaddis - 50525 Jun 202400:21:57

Jayson answers listener questions: How should you deal with trauma responses in intimate situations? Should your partner have access to your phone? What should you do if your partner isn’t interested in personal growth? What is the right way to apologize? Is it possible to make a relationship work with an emotionless partner? Find the answers to these questions and more on this episode of The Relationship School Podcast.

Timestamps:

  • 2:19 - Trauma responses in intimate situations
  • 5:55 - Dealing with a condescending partner
  • 7:45 - Should your partner have access to your phone?
  • 11:58 - Partner isn't interested in personal growth
  • 14:32 - Apologizing
  • 16:13 - Emotionless partnerships
  • 18:45 - Intentions and apologies

Links:

Advice for Anxious Fathers & Their Wives - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 50418 Jun 202400:39:55

Jayson and Ellen offer advice for anxious new dads. Why do many new dads struggle to enjoy parenting? What happens when men become aware of their relational needs for the first time, and how should they approach meeting those needs? Should new dads consider therapy? What kind of support should new dads seek from their male friends? What about sex? If you're a new parent or know new parents, you won't want to miss this.

Timestamps:

  • 1:23 - When men struggle to enjoy parenting
  • 14:57 - Men becoming conscious of their relational needs
  • 24:42 - Support from other men
  • 29:33 - Avoidant men
  • 33:52 - Sex

Links:

Trauma–Peter Levine’s Heartbreaking & Inspiring Story of Healing - Dr. Peter Levine - 50311 Jun 202401:01:39

Jayson talks with Dr. Peter Levine about the subject of trauma. Peter shares the harrowing story of what happened when his father testified against the mafia and explains why he decided to get vulnerable about his trauma in his latest book, An Autobiography of Trauma: A Healing Journey. Jayson and Peter discuss how the perception of trauma has changed recently, the danger of retraumatizing people, the process of healing trauma, and why you should be careful about who you choose to share your trauma with. Don’t miss this powerful episode.

Timestamps:

  • 4:05 - Why Peter decided to get vulnerable
  • 11:39 - Is it important to tell your story?
  • 18:15 - Testifying against the mafia
  • 26:22 - Healing from trauma by sharing
  • 34:29 - Relationships and trauma
  • 40:46 - Trauma and association
  • 50:07 - Retraumatizing people
  • 59:21 - Action step

Links:

How to Handle Hurt Feelings - Jayson Gaddis - 50204 Jun 202400:17:24

What’s the #1 mistake people make after getting their feelings hurt? Jayson discusses how to handle hurt feelings, his experience with shutting down after experiencing hurt feelings, and how to work through hurt feelings. Tune in to find out how you can turn hurt feelings into an opportunity to grow into a more resilient, self-respecting, and confident person.

Timestamps:

  • 3:09 - The mistake people make when their feelings get hurt
  • 6:18 - Jayson's experience with hurt feelings
  • 10:18 - Feel your feelings
  • 14:47 - Takeaway

Links:

Helping Teen Girls Thrive - Johannah Reimer - 50128 May 202400:49:17

Ellen Boeder interviews Johannah Reimer to find out how women can help teen girls. They discuss the unique problems that teen girls face today, the evolutionary mismatch between the environments we evolved in and modern life, the importance of doing hard things and Johannah’s Girls Group Facilitator Training, “Pathways to Womanhood”which is about guiding and supporting girls on their journey to womanhood.

Johannah is a soulcentric educator, ceremonialist, teen mentor, and an artist of many trades. Trained as a Waldorf teacher, Johannah has been working with children of all ages for over 20 years and holds a particular passion for tweens/teens striving to meet their developmental needs for mentorship and initiation in a culture that has forgotten how to do so. An apprentice of visionaries: Sage Hamilton and Melissa Michaels of SOMA Source, Johannah has worked for many years as a Waldorf teacher under the guidance of her elder Sage, and as an embodied leader for international youth in movement based Rites of Passage with Golden Bridge & Golden Girls Global.

Timestamps:

  • 5:33 - Johannah's path to becoming an educator
  • 13:19 - Why create girls' groups
  • 26:56 - Evolutionary mismatch
  • 30:20 - The value of doing hard things
  • 34:22 - Becoming an entrepreneur
  • 37:55 - What will people take from the training?
  • 43:26 - Advice for teenage girls

Links:

My Experience with Cancer - Men Listen Up - Jayson Gaddis - 50021 May 202400:18:53

Jayson opens up about his recent prostate cancer diagnosis. He talks about the causes of cancer, letting people’s care in and his recommendations for how men should monitor their health as they age. This episode is a PSA for men over 40, if you haven’t been screened for cancer, now is the time.

Timestamps:

  • 2:16 - Jayson's experience
  • 6:34 - Causes of cancer
  • 9:01 - Letting people's care in
  • 12:15 - Recommendations for men over 40

Links:

When to Stay or Leave + True Love - Annie Lalla - 49914 May 202400:38:39

IN THIS EPISODE, You will learn:

  • To see your partner as a sacred mirror and sanctuary for the growing your greatest actualized self
  • The true characteristics of a long-term partnership
  • How your partnership is the optimal container for complete transformation of yourself into the highest possible version imaginable
  • How to fall in love and why this is more important than being married
  • How to take radical responsibility for being loved in every moment of your life
  • How to actually get your needs/wants met in a partnership
  • How to know if conflict in your relationship is driving you toward or away from more magnificence

There’s a ton in this episode so dive in and go slow.

And, Here’s a great question from Annie to ask yourself if you are trying to decide to stay or leave:

Is the person I’m being called to become by what my partner’s asking me to become (if you take on the growth-development framework), will you become a more extraordinary version of yourself? If who they are asking you to become is a constricted, small, tight version of you, then this is probably not the person you want to be with.

However, if you identify as the smaller version of you, then, you are going to hear your partner’s feedback as criticism and blame and might make them wrong in the process. So, pay attention to these finer points.

Timestamps:

  • 1:47 - What are we getting into when we say yes to long-term relationships?
  • 6:04 - Becoming the best version of yourself
  • 9:49 - Annie's story
  • 16:48 - Taking responsibility when we don't feel loved
  • 21:35 - Getting out of your victimhood
  • 30:34 - When to leave

Links:

The Cost Of Stress In Your Primary Relationships with Dr. Gabor Maté - 49807 May 202400:51:38

Most of us have no idea how damaging relational stress can be. In this episode, legendary medical doctor and psycho-physio-spiritual trailblazer Dr. Gabor Maté brings some very grounded, practical examples of how relationship stress can impact our lives. The result of stress can be seen throughout the web of our life and it’s up to us to learn how to relate and attach well to our fellow humans. I love how this man turns such complicated topics into common sense. If you want a deeper cut about your marriage, children, or any stressful relationship, this episode is a must listen.

SHOWNOTES

  • What happens when Gabor’s wife forgets to pick him up at the airport. [8:30]
  • How our partners are perfectly suited to help us grow. [10:35]
  • What happened in Gabor’s childhood that makes his wife a perfect match for him now. [13:00]
  • The long-term cost of not dealing with stress. [15:00]
  • How parents can be compromised by raising their children. [17:30]
  • The link between our relationship health and our physical and mental health. [19:30]
  • What’s the best way to deal with our own relational and attachment issues? [29:00]
  • Why relational healing modalities are so effective. [30:00]
  • What we can learn from pygmy cultures about parenting and relationships. [32:30]
  • How relationship can most effectively be taught to children. [34:00]
  • The effect of Facebook and Internet on kids. [38:00]

Links:

Advice for Couples, Therapists and Coaches - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 49730 Apr 202400:38:19

Are you attending couples therapy but feeling like you're not making progress? Jayson and Ellen delve into why couples often find themselves spinning their wheels and offer insights on how to propel your relationship forward if you're feeling stuck. They also tackle the issue of spiritual bypassing, emphasizing that true letting go is a gradual process.

Timestamps:

  • 2:01 - Couples not making progress
  • 7:36 - Doing the work
  • 22:28 - Overly spiritual couples

Links:

Polyamory vs Monogamy - Irka & Eugene - 49623 Apr 202401:02:15

Irka and Eugene join Jayson to talk non-monogamy. Is monogamy inherently restrictive? Do people in polyamorous relationships have boundaries? Is non-hierarchical polyamory possible? What role does sexual exploration play in a polyamorous relationship? Is non-monogamy for you? Whether you’re monogamous or not, you’ll find plenty of wisdom in this insightful conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 8:45 - Definitions and terms
  • 11:40 - Boundaries
  • 19:52 - Thirds
  • 34:09 - Is monogamy inherently restrictive?
  • 37:39 - Sexual exploration
  • 42:27 - Is non-monogamy for you?
  • 51:03 - Communication
  • 53:51 - Advice for high school kids
  • 57:45 - Links
  • 59:15 - Action step

Links:

28 Years Strong Even After Affairs - Satyen and Suzanne Raja - 49516 Apr 202400:53:36

In this podcast, I interview Satyen and Suzanne, both long-time students of David Deida. These two are super honest, loving individuals, and wow have they been through a lot! There share some very vulnerable details about how they navigated religion, affairs, and fighting. They give you concrete practical tools you can try right now with your partner. These guys live it!

SHOWNOTES

  • How did Satyen and Suzanne start caring about relationships? [4:27]
  • Why did Satyen resist marriage? [7:00]
  • What ingredient was the “it” factor for Suzanne’s attraction to Satyen? [7:44]
  • What role did religion play in their relationship? [10:42]
  • How did fighting about food bring them closer? [12:15]
  • What impact did David Deida have on their connection? [14:28]
  • How did they create a new template for their relationship? [16:06]
  • The most challenging period of their relationship [18:02]
  • One really important practice to heal from infidelity [20:15]
  • Satyen and Suzanne demonstrate a powerful tool to express emotional pain to your partner [26:30]
  • The often-missed key to understanding your partner [32:43]
  • What is PCP and ISE and how do they create connection and turn-on? [34:50]

Links:

 

Satyen and Suzanne are the authorities on relationship – passionately intwined for twenty-seven years and sought after by people over the the world for their powerful and cutting edge trainings. With over two decades of study, teaching and facilitation in this area, they have taught tens of thousands of singles and couples the art of creating passionate, juicy intimacy that lasts a lifetime.

A living demonstration of a couple who are continually re-igniting their spark, passion and love, Satyen and Suzanne practically distill what for many can be a confusing, frustrating and even painful topic down to its very workable, irresistible essence. Whether on radio, tv or in auditoriums of thousands, their style is provocative, inspiring, and above all, full of practical wisdom. They have a unique gift for hearing what lies beneath your questions, and giving you answers that convey deep truths with incredible heart. Never shy of controversy, they are willing to take conventional wisdom to task where it falls short in order to help you learn and live the most effective relationship skills.

Satyen and Suzanne are committed to, and superlatively skilled at, saying the things that no one else says, going places that no one else goes — so that you can have the hot, deep, loving, passionate relationship that you deserve…starting now!

http://acceleratedevolutionacademy.com

My Take on Andrew Huberman and His Relationship Issues - Jayson Gaddis - 49409 Apr 202400:23:26

Jayson shares his thoughts on the controversy surrounding popular podcaster Andrew Huberman. What can we learn about ourselves and our relationships from the online reaction to the recent revelations about Andrew Huberman? What are you projecting onto the authority figures in your life? Are you putting people in your life on a pedestal, and how will you react when they inevitably fail you?

Timestamps:

  • 2:17 - What can we learn from the Andrew Huberman situation?
  • 5:24 - Pedestal to pit
  • 13:55 - Are you projecting on to authority figures?

Links:

The Purpose of Relationship Pain - Jayson Gaddis - 49302 Apr 202400:27:36

Relationship pain has a very clear purpose. If you are hip to it, you’ll thrive in relationships. If you are uneducated here, you’ll run away and play the victim. Direct and to the point, I suggest a very important daily practice for you to strengthen your mindset about long-term partnership. Pain hurts indeed. And, what if pain was your ally in disguise?

 

Relationship Pain Daily Practice

I have two choices with my relationship pain:

1. Use it to make me weaker by whining, complaining, and blaming others (or myself).
2. Use it to make me stronger by seeing it as my ally to master the lesson it’s bringing me.

It’s 100% of the time up to me to choose.


Timestamps:

  • 3:15 - Two choices when it comes to relationship pain
  • 9:32 - The first thing to NOT do when in relationship pain
  • 13:40 - The good news about pain and stress
  • 19:40 - The link between your emotional pain and your numbing habits
  • 24:37 - Action step

Links:

Dan Savage On Being Monogamish - Dan Savage - 49226 Mar 202401:04:01

Are you simply defaulting to monogamy?

Have you ever genuinely asked yourself, "Would a different sexual model work better for me?"

Dan Savage, an author, sex-advice columnist, podcaster, and public speaker, suggests that we should all regularly pose these questions to ourselves. Dan and his husband have chosen what they call a "monogamish" relationship. They've acknowledged that it's impossible to fulfill all of your partner's needs, and that's a message from which we can all learn.

While we typically focus on monogamous long-term relationships, in this episode, we'll explore how various types of relationships can be successful. Tune in and prepare for some introspection into your own sexual expression.

Timestamps:

  • 5:00 - What does monogamish mean?
  • 11:27 - Eroticism in a long-term relationship
  • 17:24 - Bringing in a third
  • 23:37 - Monogamy as the default setting
  • 31:00 - Changing broken marraige norms
  • 33:50 - Dan's relationship journey
  • 46:49 - Allowing for erotic autonomy
  • 53:57 - Dan's advice for young people
  • 59:00 - Action step

Links:

Conflict, Communication, Fixing, Problem Solving - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 49119 Mar 202400:29:38

Jayson and Ellen discuss conflict, communication, and problem-solving versus understanding. What's the issue with being a conflict-avoidant couple? When is it appropriate to problem-solve and offer advice to a long-term partner? Can excessive understanding become problematic? Tune in to hear Ellen and Jayson offer a few simple strategies that you can use to resolve your communication issues.

Timestamps:

  • 1:51 - Avoiding Conflict
  • 11:21 - Solving communication problems
  • 17:04 - Problem solving vs understanding
  • 20:28 - The conflict-repair cycle
  • 22:31 - Taking action vs understanding

Links:

Couples Coaching: Anya & Bodhi Part 2 - Jayson Gaddis - #49012 Mar 202401:15:21

Jayson coaches the couple, Anya and Bodhi. The last time this couple appeared on the podcast was in episode #364 when they were in the midst of deciding whether to stay together or break up. Since their last appearance, they have grown into a strong and stable couple. In this episode, they discuss the turning point in their relationship that led to them staying together. They also work through current tensions in their relationship related to conflicting schedules and navigating a small living space. You won’t want to miss this insightful conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 5:17 - Anya & Bodhi's turning point
  • 13:23 - Individual growth
  • 20:00 - Getting to the root of relationship tension
  • 33:34 - Feeling trapped by a lack of connectedness
  • 39:05 - Spontaneity vs. responsibility
  • 43:00 - Different schedules
  • 47:00 - Helping your partner feel less judged
  • 1:00:30 - Being true to yourself vs. being considerate
  • 1:08:59 - Action step

Links:

Teen Talk: An Intimate Conversation With My Son - Jayson & Lucian Gaddis - 48905 Mar 202400:28:29

Jayson is joined by his son Lucian for a conversation about the unique challenges of being a teenager in high school. What are the challenges of being from a relationally focused family? What kinds of stereotypes do teens face? Why do so many parents over-parent their kids? You won’t want to miss this candid father-son conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 3:52 - Boys in high school
  • 5:28 - Social media apps
  • 6:19 - Waldorf vs. public high school
  • 9:21 - The relational family experiance
  • 16:41 - Challenges high school kids face
  • 20:25 - Over-parenting
  • 23:41 - How to get teenagers involved

Links:

The Trap of Falling in Love - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 48827 Feb 202400:37:09

Is it possible to truly love someone while you’re still infatuated with them? In this episode, Jayson and Ellen talk about the trap of falling in love and why it’s important to learn to live with the reality of who your partner actually is instead of projecting your fantasies onto them. How can you make your partner your priority every day? What should your relationship boundaries be? It’s time to take a deep dive into the world of love after infatuation.

Timestamps:

  • 2:16 - Infatuation vs. love
  • 6:16 - Reality vs. fantasy
  • 20:00 - Accepting people for who they are
  • 24:48 - Know your relationship boundaries
  • 28:16 - Love after infatuation
  • 31:52 - Our impact on others

Links:

 

Dealing with Division and Getting Unstuck - Jayson Gaddis - 48720 Feb 202400:22:08

Jayson talks about dealing with division in the world, digital minimalism and getting unstuck in your relationship. Can solving division in the home help make the world a better place? How do you know when you’re stuck as a couple? What should you do if you’re stuck? Would you like to be the next guest on The Relationship School Podcast? Listen in to find out more!

Timestamps:

  • 4:01 - Couples, how do you know when you're stuck?
  • 11:47 - Dealing with division
  • 19:25 - Action steps

Links:

Coaching Session: From Being Ghosted to Self Love - Jayson Gaddis - 48613 Feb 202400:57:21

Jason coaches two women live on the podcast. How should you deal with the experience of a long-term partner ghosting you? What should you do when you feel self-doubt and loneliness? How can you find meaning in the end of a long-term relationship? You won’t want to miss the chance to sit in on this powerful coaching session with Jayson, Katie and Camille.

Timestamps:

  • 4:09 - Katie's story
  • 8:27 - Being there for yourself
  • 16:26 - Katie's personal growth journey
  • 26:17 - Camille's story
  • 29:56 - Dealing with a partner who ghosted
  • 37:46 - Finding meaning in the end of a relationship
  • 46:51 - Finding your anchor

Links:

Allowance, Chores, Family Economy & Empowering your Kids with Money - James Ure - 48506 Feb 202401:07:29

Helping children learn to be financially responsible is one of the most important jobs that parents have. James Ure joins Jayson to talk about how a family economy can help you give your child the best chance to achieve success and independence when they leave home. Should you pay your child for chores? How much of an allowance should you give your child? What is the difference between bribery and empowerment? How can you teach your child the importance of saving, investing, and giving to charity? You won’t want to miss this insightful conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 8:31 - What is a family economy?
  • 13:55 - Creating incentives for kids
  • 25:55 - Tracking a family economy without an app
  • 37:41 - Using money and screentime as motivators
  • 41:54 - Bribing vs. empowering
  • 45:37 - Implementing a family economy
  • 53:31 - The Greenlight app
  • 57:46 - Big purchases
  • 1:01:09 - Where to find James
  • 1:02:34 - James' advice for high school students
  • 1:03:40 - Action steps

Links:

Working With Men in Coaching and Therapy - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 48430 Jan 202400:40:51

Jayson and Ellen team up to talk about working with men in coaching and therapy. How can you tell when a man is ready to grow? How does couples' work help men? What are the advantages of attending a men’s group? Are men more comfortable with male or female therapists? If you’re a man or you have men in your life, you won’t want to miss this insightful conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 6:16 - Ways that men get stuck
  • 10:52 - Working through men's defensiveness
  • 13:56 - Recognizing men's issues
  • 17:27 - How male clients project
  • 21:10 - Are men more comfortable with male or female therapists
  • 24:48 - Men's groups
  • 29:44 - How couples work helps men
  • 31:35 - How to get men to change
  • 34:09 - Making sure a man is ready to grow
  • 36:34 - Action steps

Links:

How Therapist Bruce Tift Helped Me Have the Balls to Marry My Wife - Bruce Tift - 48323 Jan 202401:05:40

Bruce was one of THE pivotal factors in helping me marry my wife before she slammed the door shut on me. Hear that story in this episode and why it’s so common for couples to struggle. Bruce offers a powerful frame for relationship and intimacy and makes the distinction between the developmental work we need to do, and the possibility that we are “already free” in relationship. Check it.

Timestamps:

  • 4:29 - Jayson's history with Bruce
  • 7:22 - Dealing with contradictions in relationships
  • 15:11 - The value of separateness
  • 23:04 - The practice of personal responsibility
  • 27:26 - Bruce shares about his marriage
  • 32:37 - How Bruce became a therapist
  • 38:42 - What is a successful relationship?
  • 43:19 - The impact of parenting on Bruce
  • 47:13 - Sexual intimacy in a long-term relationship
  • 55:43 - Personal responsibility
  • 1:01:19 - Bruce's book, Already Free

Links:

What’s Wrong With Wanting a Healthy Relationship? - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 48216 Jan 202400:21:42

What’s wrong with wanting a healthy relationship? Jayson and Ellen are here to break it down. "Healthy" is a poorly defined concept, which can create nebulous expectations that are impossible to live up to. If you’ve written yourself off because you believe you’re incapable of having healthy relationships, it’s time to level up and start focusing on how you can foster growth-oriented relationships going forward. Tune in to learn how you can set realistic expectations and define the relationship experience that you want. It’s time to plan for reality and aspire for greatness.

Timestamps:

  • 4:57 - Defining what “healthy” means
  • 7:09 - Deciding on the relationship experience you want
  • 8:41 - Creating realistic expectations
  • 11:14 - Plan for reality, aspire for greatness
  • 15:00 - Don’t write yourself off
  • 16:49 - Growth oriented relationships
  • 19:17 - Action steps

Links:

How Menopause Changes You and Your Relationships - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 48109 Jan 202400:46:35

Ellen joins Jayson to discuss menopause and its impact on relationships. What is menopause? Do women in non-western cultures experience menopause differently than women in western cultures? What happens to women’s hormones during menopause? What about hormone replacement therapy? Tune in to hear Jayson and Ellen share their personal experiences surrounding menopause and learn how you can nurture your relationships through the menopausal journey.

Timestamps:

  • 3:34 - What is menopause?
  • 7:02 - How does menopause impact relationships?
  • 13:53 - How does culture impact the experience of menopause?
  • 16:50 - Why are resources for menopause scarce?
  • 19:01 - What happens to women’s hormones during menopause?
  • 21:54 - Jayson’s perspective
  • 30:40 - Keeping your partner in mind
  • 37:24 - Resource recommendation
  • 41:51 - HRT

Links:

Challenging Sensitive Kids - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 48002 Jan 202400:37:07

Jayson and Ellen share valuable insights about nurturing antifragile confidence in sensitive children and offer practical tips for creating a supportive environment that encourages resilience and emotional well-being. Gain a deeper understanding of what defines a sensitive child. Discover practical strategies and compassionate approaches for navigating moments when your sensitive child is hesitant or resistant, and learn how to find the balance between challenging your child and respecting their emotions.

Whether you're a parent, caregiver, or simply interested in understanding the dynamics of parenting sensitive children, this episode offers a wealth of wisdom. Tune in for a discussion that will empower you to embrace and celebrate the uniqueness of your sensitive child while fostering a foundation of strength and confidence.

Timestamps:

  • 5:54 - What is a sensitive kid like?
  • 9:29 - Overprotective parenting
  • 14:20 - Are you asking too much of your child?
  • 19:40 - Helping your child build antifragile confidence
  • 23:09 - Validating your child's feelings
  • 32:07 - Action steps

Links:

3 Simple Tips to Optimize Your Health, Snoring, and Breathing - Sachin Patel - 47926 Dec 202300:56:39

In this episode, Jayson is joined by best-selling author and functional medicine practice success coach Sachin Patel. Do you or your partner struggle with snoring? Is it a constant challenge for you to get enough sleep? Sachin offers some basic steps that you can take to begin turning your health around. These range from simple changes you can make today, such as adjusting ambient home lighting, to incorporating effective breathing techniques. If you’re interested in taking control of your health, you won’t want to miss this fascinating conversation.

Timestamps:

  • 6:23 - Who is Sachin Patel?
  • 8:11 - Sachin's wellness journey
  • 17:44 - Why don't people do what's good for them?
  • 28:16 - Why is nose breathing so important?
  • 33:20 - Snoring
  • 43:07 - Basic steps to change your health
  • 48:42 - Advice for young people
  • 52:59 - Action step

Links:

Common Misconceptions About Secure Attachment - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 47819 Dec 202300:26:39

Everyone wants to be in a securely attached relationship, but what does secure attachment really look like? In this episode, Jayson and Ellen talk about secure attachment and address some common misconceptions. How can you know the difference between infatuation and secure attachment? How long does it take to develop secure attachment in a romantic relationship? How do securely attached relationships differ between different couples? Tune in to learn how you can create and maintain long-lasting and meaningful partnerships.

Timestamps:

  • 2:00 - Secure attachment vs. infatuation
  • 5:21 - How long does it take to know if you’re securely attached?
  • 8:59 - Working through the challenge stage
  • 11:26 - Misconceptions about secure attachment
  • 20:25 - Make sure you both want the same type of relationship
  • 23:02 - Action steps

Links:

Leadership and the Longing to Belong - Jerry Colonna - 47712 Dec 202301:17:57

Jerry Colonna joins Jayson to discuss leadership and the longing to belong. How can parents help get their kids to adulthood? Why is it important for leaders to do the inner work? How can self-awareness help you access your empathy? How can you be more effective as a coach and a leader? Whether you’re a parent, a coach or a leader in some other capacity, there’s plenty to learn from Jerry’s story and his insights.

Timestamps:

  • 8:19 - Why is it important for a leader to do the inner work?
  • 12:11 - Accessing empathy through self-awareness
  • 15:52 - How parents can help kids get to adulthood
  • 19:23 - Being effective as a coach
  • 27:54 - Where's the power?
  • 30:27 - Depression in middle-aged men
  • 33:09 - The seductive nature of doing
  • 36:43 - Belonging
  • 40:09 - The family dynamic
  • 42:21 - Feeling alone in a crowd
  • 45:16 - Nurturing true belonging
  • 52:20 - How many corporations are doing the work?
  • 57:16 - Taking a relational position as a leader
  • 59:28 - How important are partners?
  • 1:01:00 - Psychoanalysis
  • 1:06:50 - Leaders need therapy too
  • 1:13:27 - Jerry's advice for highschool kids
  • 1:15:47 - Action step

Links:

7 Signs of the Spiritual Narcissist and How to Know if They Are Truly Healing - Jayson Gaddis - 47605 Dec 202300:13:48

Jayson explores the seven revealing signs of spiritual narcissism and the journey to authentic transformation. Join Jayson for insights into recognizing these behaviors in spiritual narcissists, from lingo mastery to their struggle with attachment work. Learn how to distinguish genuine growth and see when a spiritual seeker becomes an empowered, empathetic individual.



Timestamps:

  • 3:57 - Seven signs of the spiritual narcissist
  • 4:42 - Talking the talk without walking the walk
  • 5:54 - Unsuccessful long-term relationships
  • 6:37 - Recreating the family of origin
  • 7:25 - A lack of empathy
  • 8:05 - Fear of attachment
  • 9:19 - Refusing to do the work
  • 10:47 - How do you know if they’re changing?

Links:

Decoding the Meaning of 'Doing the Work' - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 47528 Nov 202300:27:18

If you’re in the personal development space, chances are you’ve heard the term 'doing the work' thrown around often, but what does it really mean? Is there a right way to do the work? How can you gauge whether your personal development work is really having an impact? Jayson and Ellen share their insights about what it means to 'do the work' and touch on topics from intimate relationships and family to psychedelics and yoga along the way.

 

Timestamps:

  • 5:14 - What does "doing the work" look like?
  • 8:17 - The litmus test for personal growth
  • 10:15 - Why intimate partnership is so important for personal development
  • 16:25 - Holding more complexity
  • 21:12 - Doing the work should have results 
  • 23:45 - The role of relational context

Links:

Epic Personal Growth Tips From the Masters - Brian Johnson - 47421 Nov 202301:07:39

Jayson sits down with author, philosopher and CEO, Brian Johnson, to talk about how you can reach your heroic potential. Brian shares Seven Objectives that you can implement today to supercharge your personal growth journey. Learn how to forge antifragile confidence, optimize your big three and dominate the fundamentals. If you want to master yourself and activate your superpower, this episode is a must listen.

Timestamps:

  • 4:35 - Who is Brian Johnson?
  • 12:04 - Seven objectives
  • 13:55 - Antifragile confidence
  • 23:23 - Sidestepping lizards vs slaying dragons
  • 27:03 - Dominating the fundamentals
  • 32:00 - The victim inside
  • 35:20 - Knowing the ultimate game
  • 44:11 - Optimizing your big three
  • 48:52 - Tips for learning and reflection
  • 52:45 - Ambition
  • 58:52 - Brian's advice for young people
  • 1:04:57 - Action step

Links:

A Few Words of Encouragement - Jayson Gaddis - 47314 Nov 202300:18:52

Do you feel like you need to pick yourself back up? Jayson has a few words of encouragement for you today. All of us have an inner warrior that has gotten us through life’s trials until this point and Jayson offers two great tips for how to connect with that warrior part inside ourselves. He also shares a hack that can help you when life feels like it’s too hard. Tune in to learn how embracing hardship and getting out of your victimhood can help you meet life’s challenges.

Timestamps:

  • 3:20 - Warriorship
  • 9:05 - How do you meet challenges?
  • 11:18 - Embrace hardship
  • 15:31 - Your life is yours to deal with

Links:

Boundaries: Relationship Tool - Lisa Dion - 47207 Nov 202300:49:54

Lisa Dion joins Jayson to talk boundaries. Boundaries are one of the most important tools in intimate relationships. How much you struggle to say no can say a lot about how much you value yourself. You must have boundaries if you want to go the distance in a relationship.

Timestamps:

  • The huge breakthrough insight about boundaries that Lisa shared with Jayson [6:38]
  • The four things our brain is always scanning for to determine if there is a threat or challenge [8:34]
  • What is Lisa’s definition of a boundary? [14:30]
  • Jayson and Lisa demonstrate how to set a boundary [17:43]
  • The big fear we all carry in ourselves [23:15]
  • The weakness many of us have when receiving a boundary request [23:12]
  • What are the most common feedback signs our body gives us? [27:00]
  • The three types of boundaries [32:06]
  • Jayson issues a boundary challenge [45:08]

Links:

 

Entrepreneurs, Their Relationships, and What Fuels Them - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 47131 Oct 202300:45:01

Jayson and Ellen talk entrepreneurship. What inspired Jayson to create The Relationship School? What is it like to be in a relationship with an entrepreneur? What drives entrepreneurs? Can you be addicted to stress? Are you afraid that you’ll lose your motivation if you do the inner work and deal with your issues? Listen to discover how both your relationships and your business can benefit when you stop letting stress and inadequacy drive you.

Timestamps:

  • 2:59 - What is an entrepreneur?
  • 4:48 - Why do people want to coach entrepreneurs?
  • 8:05 - How do entrepreneurs fuel their work?
  • 19:49 - What does it look like to run a business in an integrated way?
  • 24:11 - Can you get addicted to stress?
  • 29:48 - Applying a growth mindset to every area in your life
  • 31:24 - Advice for partners of entrepreneurs
  • 36:09 - How being preoccupied causes issues in the family system
  • 41:48 - Being proactive

Links:

4 Powerful Questions if You Are Feeling Off, Lost or Depressed - Xavier Dagba - 47024 Oct 202301:09:36

Xavier Dagba is a coach who focuses on shadow integration and trauma informed transformation. He has an inspiring story that emphasizes the power of listening to the voice inside and following your passion no matter the cost. 
Why is shadow work so important? What can you learn from your imposter syndrome? Can envy ever be used in a positive way? Join Jayson and Xavier for a powerful conversation that will change the way you think about yourself and your relationships.

Timestamps:

  • 4:08 - Who is Xavier?
  • 15:15 - How can you learn to listen to the voice inside?
  • 24:18 - Xavier's journey to becoming a mentor
  • 31:07 - Shadow integration
  • 32:41 - Working with envy in a positive way
  • 39:22 - Fatherhood
  • 51:40 - What can imposter syndrome teach us?
  • 1:04:00 - Xavier's advice for kids
  • 1:08:00 - Action step

Links:

Why You Need 2 of These Types of Friends in Your Life - Jayson Gaddis - 46917 Oct 202300:13:30

Friends are some of the most important relationships in our lives, but some types of friendships help us grow more than others. Jayson explains why you need to cultivate friendships with people who are comfortable challenging you and who aren’t afraid to go deep. Learn why it's so important to have two of this type of friend and how you can set an intention to foster this type of friendship in the future.

Timestamps:

  • 2:21 - Friends that aren't great for you
  • 3:48 - The type of friend that you need
  • 8:03 - Why you need 2 of this type of friend
  • 10:56 - Setting an intention to go deeper in your friendships

Links:

Agreeing to a Mediocre Relationship - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 46810 Oct 202300:28:50

Why do people get complacent in long-term relationships? Jayson and Ellen discuss a situation where a couple mutually decided to put their marriage on the back burner to avoid conflict. What are the drawbacks of using complacency as a coping mechanism? Is ignoring your relational needs in order to avoid conflict a sustainable long-term strategy? Tune in to learn how to break out of the complacency trap and get real with your partner today.

Timestamps:

  • 2:22 - Using complacency to avoid conflict
  • 5:30 - Is being complacent okay if it reduces conflict?
  • 7:29 - The drawbacks of complacency as a conflict avoidance strategy
  • 8:37 - When relationship feels like a demand instead of a gift
  • 12:38 - Complacency doesn't solve underlying issues
  • 17:55 - Avoidant people need relationship too
  • 20:22 - Is ignoring your emotional needs sustainable?
  • 23:04 - Standing for three

Links:

Staying in a Dead Marriage for the Kids - Jayson Gaddis - 46703 Oct 202300:19:13

This is a pretty charged issue. On the one hand, some people really believe divorce is one of the major causes of problems in children. On the other hand, newer research suggests that kids are fine coming from divorced families, and in fact may even be more resilient and capable of handling life’s challenges. If you really think divorce is going to mess up your kids, think again…

Timestamps:

  • The erroneous assumption that comes along with divorce statistics [3:30]
  • What is the real issue here? [8:40]
  • The problem with divorce/marriage research [12:20]
  • What I suggest you do if you are in a dead marriage [15:40]

Links:

The Surprising Difference Between Divorced People and Married People - Mark Manson - #46626 Sep 202300:50:56

What can you learn from divorced people and what can you learn from people who have been married for a decade or two? What are the main differences? There are two and we cover them in this episode with author Mark Manson. We also explore how Mark navigated a big challenge with his now wife and why self-improvement and self-awareness are so essential to long-term partnership.

 

Timestamps:

  • 1:03 - Episode introduction
  • 4:36 - Mark Manson's backstory
  • 8:52 - Common issues and challenges
  • 10:42 - Healthy boundaries
  • 15:28 - How important is it for couples to have friends outside their relationship?
  • 17:13 - Challenges in marriage and how to get through them
  • 26:04 - Is respect more important than communication?
  • 31:17 - How school ill prepares us for life
  • 33:57 - What can we learn from people who have been divorced?
  • 36:50 - Cultivating self-awareness
  • 40:38 - Mark's preferred methods of introspection
  • 42:54 - The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
  • 46:24 - Action Steps

Links:

The Misattuned Camper & Not Getting The Impact of Our Behavior on Others - Jayson Gaddis & Ellen Boeder - 46519 Sep 202300:24:04

Explore the wilderness of Colorado with Jayson and Ellen in this upcoming episode. Their backpacking adventure takes an unexpected turn which leads to thought-provoking insights about human interactions, relationships, and the delicate balance between self-expression and consideration for others. Tune in to this discussion that will inspire you to reflect on your own interactions and the impact of your actions on those around you.

Timestamps:

  • 4:04 - The story of the misattuned camper
  • 11:38 - How our behavior impacts others
  • 17:32 - Why our relationship to others matters
  • 20:34 - Standing for three
  • 21:48 - Keeping each other in mind

Links:

Human Development, Spiritual Growth, & Consciousness - Mark Divine - 46412 Sep 202301:08:07

This week Jayson welcomes back a returning guest and good friend, Mark Divine. Together, they discuss the stages of human development, emphasizing the importance of maturing, resolving emotional issues, and achieving full integration as individuals. They cover diverse aspects, from self-connection to various spiritual paths, authentic leadership, and simplifying life for a more meaningful existence. Join Jayson and Mark for a journey into personal evolution and a reflection on the impact of technology on relationships.

Timestamps:

  • 0:46 - Guest introduction
  • 7:04 - Levels of development
  • 9:33 - The five stages
  • 17:12 - Relational development
  •  20:41 - Four frameworks
  • 25:28 - Working on yourself through relationship
  • 27:34 - Spiritual development
  • 30:56 - Doing relational work as a man
  • 36:18 - Moving from doing to being
  • 39:14 - Is distraction a defense mechanism?
  • 41:56 - Being present with your kids
  • 45:11 - Digital distractions
  • 51:51 - Making Integral Theory digestible
  • 54:59 - Dissolving polarity
  • 58:46 - Escaping the maze of victimhood
  • 1:02:17 - What are Mark and Jayson up to currently?
  • 1:05:54 - Action steps

Links:

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