Have a question for the Courtney?
Submit it at: phases.fm/questions
Q&A episodes are coming!

If traditional parenting advice isn't landing with your kid, you're not alone — and you're not doing it wrong. In this episode, Courtney and Scott break down five practical, science-backed strategies for parenting a child with ADHD. These aren't about fixing your child — they're about working with how their brain is wired. From rethinking how you give instructions to reframing what "good behavior" actually looks like, these small shifts can make a real difference. Pick one, try it this week,.

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❓ Got a question for the doctor?
Submit it at: phases.fm/questions
Q&A episodes are coming!

In the very first episode of Phases, Dr. Courtney Tolinski, a licensed clinical and educational psychologist with over 15 years working with families, sits down with her husband Scott to share their top 10 parenting tips for 2026. Grounded in child development, emotional regulation, and attachment theory, these tips cover how we communicate with our kids, how we manage our own stress as parents, and how to build connection through everyday moments. Courtney and Scott get real about what this looks like in their own home, from kitchen dance parties and 3D printer adventures to a Disney trip cancelled by a hurricane. If you're looking for judgment-free, psychology-backed parenting advice that actually feels doable, start here. Pick one tip that hits home and build from there.

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Welcome to Phases

We're Courtney and Scott — a married couple diving into the messy, beautiful, ever-changing world of raising kids and growing up alongside them.

Courtney brings her PhD in educational psychology. Scott brings… questions (and experience co-hosting Syntax.fm). Together, we're exploring family psychology, human development, and parenting — judgment-free.

What to Expect

• Real conversations about child development stages, behavior, emotions, and the stuff no one warns you about
• Research-backed insights made actually useful — no textbook lectures
• Relationship & identity — how parenting changes you, your marriage, and your sense of self
• Listener questions — bring your chaos, we'll bring the context
• Zero judgment — just honest talk from two parents figuring it out in real time

Coming Soon

• 10 Parenting Tips for 2026 — what's actually working right now
• 5 Hacks for ADHD — practical strategies from both sides of the diagnosis
• Self-Care for Parents — why it's not selfish and how to actually do it
• AI and Homework — how to guide kids in using tech as a tool, not a crutch
• The Anatomy of a Meltdown — what's happening in their brain (and yours)
• …and more

phases.fm
https://www.youtube.com/@phasesfm

Subscribe wherever you listen. New episodes dropping soon.

You've noticed the signs. Now what? In part two of this series, Courtney and Scott break down the actual steps you can take when you suspect your child has a learning disability. Who to call first, what to ask for, what evaluations look like, and what rights you have as a parent (more than you probably think).

In this episode:

• Where to start when you suspect a learning disability
• The difference between school evaluations and private evaluations
• What to say to your child's teacher (and what to ask for)
• Your legal rights as a parent and how to use them
• What an IEP and 504 plan actually are and how to get one
• How to advocate for your kid without feeling like you're fighting the system

Something feels off with your kid at school but you're not sure if you're overreacting or if it's something real. In this episode, Courtney and Scott walk through what to look for when your gut is telling you something more is going on. From the early signs at every age to understanding the difference between a developmental delay and a learning disability, this is the conversation most parents need but never get. It's about getting your kid the support they need so they stop feeling like something is wrong with them.

In this episode:

• Why so many parents delay action (and why that's completely normal)
• Signs worth paying attention to from preschool through middle school
• The difference between "developing on their own timeline" and a true learning disability

If you're the parent lying awake wondering whether you should say something, you're not overreacting. Share this with someone who needs to hear that. 

Praise effort, not talent. Research shows how you talk to your kids about failure shapes their entire mindset. Dr. Courtney breaks down 25+ years of Carol Dweck's research and what parents can actually do differently — from preschool through high school.

In this episode:

What growth vs. fixed mindset really means (and what it doesn't)
The 1998 study that changed how we think about praise
Why your view of failure matters more than your view of intelligence
How fixed mindset shows up at every age
Practical scripts and reframes you can use tonight
Special considerations for neurodivergent kids

The Girl who Never Made Mistakes
https://amzn.to/3Pht3kX

Your Fantastic Elastic Brain
https://amzn.to/3Pcwqd2

Rosie Revere, Engineer
https://amzn.to/4dsWVov

Mindset: The New Psychology of Success
https://amzn.to/4bvG0PD

Have a question for the Courtney?
Submit it at: phases.fm/questions
Q&A episodes are coming!

Courtney and Scott talk about what self care actually looks like when you’re parenting and already stretched thin. They talk about why self-care isn’t selfish (it’s how you stay regulated enough to show up), how it changes depending on what phase your kid is in, and how to find small pockets of time when your day already feels full.

Pick one small thing from this episode and try it this week.

phases.fm

Have a question for the Courtney?
Submit it at: phases.fm/questions
Q&A episodes are coming!

Dr. Courtney and Scott talk about the surprising ways that anxiety might show up in your child. They discuss:

• What anxiety looks like in kids (and how it's different from adults).
• The worry cycle that kids often get stuck in and how to recognize it.
• How parents often respond to worry in ways that may make it worse for their kids.
• Tools to actually teach your child science-backed tools to help them (and you!) cope with it. 
• How to recognize when therapy may be a helpful addition to your child's life.

Helpful Resources Discussed:

Go Noodle Mindfulness Videos on Youtube
https://www.gonoodle.com/

Guided Anxiety Book (CBT) for Kids
https://amzn.to/423a8NL

Anxiety Book to Help Parents
https://amzn.to/4mEHn3P

If you liked this episode, let us know if you want to hear more about anxiety!

phases.fm

Dr. Courtney Tolinski is answering your top questions about parenting and child development. Topics covered in this episode include:

• How to talk to your child about their neurodivergent brain, including whether you should use "labels" and your own experiences to help them understand. 
• Navigating what to do when your child and their friend (or siblings) have a conflict at your house. 
• Helping preschool-aged kids manage their big feelings and how to stay calm in the storm. 
• Knowing when to consider medication for a child with ADHD and how to work with their teacher to manage it.
• Does gentle parenting actually produce successful adults?
• What to do if your child has a big dream (professional sports; artist, etc.) and you want to be both realistic and supportive.

Resources Discussed:

https://explainingbrains.com/

https://www.understood.org/

Have a question for Dr. Courtney?
Submit it at: phases.fm/questions