Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast Love Yourself Thin Podcast

"Comparison is the thief of joy… but in the weight loss world, it becomes the thief of identity."

In this episode of Love Yourself Thin, Dara Tomasson dives into the comparison trap — that exhausting cycle of constantly feeling like you're not enough, not thin enough, not disciplined enough, or not successful enough.

But what if those feelings didn't happen by accident?

What if comparison was carefully manufactured by diet culture, media, and beauty standards designed to keep women chasing an impossible finish line?

In this episode, Dara explores:
• Why "I'll be happy when…" keeps women stuck
• How comparison steals joy, confidence, and authenticity
• The history of shifting beauty standards from Marilyn Monroe to heroin chic
• Why social media intensifies feelings of inadequacy
• The psychological cost of constantly seeing yourself as a "project"
• How the beauty and weight loss industry profits from dissatisfaction
• The difference between a "project body" and an "inhabited body"
• How to stop postponing joy until you lose weight
• Dara's personal story about body image, surgery, and self-acceptance
• A powerful "Joy Audit" exercise to help you reconnect with your life now

This episode is an invitation to stop asking:
"Am I good enough?"

…and start asking:
"Is this standard good enough for me?"

If you've spent years hiding in photos, avoiding swimsuits, comparing yourself to everyone around you, and waiting to finally feel worthy once you lose weight — this episode is for you.

Ready to uncover what's really keeping you stuck?
Book a free coaching call with Dara to explore the root of your struggles with food, body image, and self-worth. Book HERE.

Check out Dara's lifetime program where weight loss is just the first step to uncovering a life that is full of joy, confidence and love! More about it HERE.

Next week: Episode 254 — The Pathway to Freedom

In this episode of The Love Yourself Thin Podcast, Dara continues her powerful series on the hidden history of diet culture and weight loss. Last week, we explored the blueprint of shame. This week, we uncover the control trap.

Why have so many women stopped trusting themselves around food? Why do we believe an app, a diet book, or a set of food rules knows our body better than we do?

Dara walks through the history of weight loss culture—from the first diet book in 1863 to calorie counting, slimming clubs, diet pills, Weight Watchers, processed food marketing, and today's GLP-1 era—to reveal how the diet industry slowly trained women to distrust their own hunger, body, and intuition.

If you've spent decades starting over every Monday, following someone else's rules, and feeling like you "fail" when you can't keep up, this episode will help you understand why.

This conversation is especially for women over 50 who are tired of dieting, tired of obsessing over food, and ready to create permanent weight loss by healing the deeper patterns underneath emotional eating, perfectionism, procrastination, and people-pleasing.

In this episode, Dara discusses:

✨ The first diet book and how weight loss became rule-based
✨ Why diet culture teaches women to distrust themselves
✨ The connection between control, shame, and food
✨ How calorie counting changed women's relationship with eating
✨ The rise of slimming clubs, diet pills, and public weigh-ins
✨ Why food rules often become emotional "buffers"
✨ The difference between external control and self-governance
✨ How emotional eating is often about safety, not food
✨ Why lasting weight loss starts with trust, not restriction

Dara also shares personal insights about growing up as a people-pleaser, how food became emotional protection, and why learning to feel emotions instead of controlling them changed everything.

If you're ready to stop fighting yourself and finally understand the real reason weight loss has felt so hard, this episode is for you.

Connect with Dara:

Subscribe to the podcast for weekly conversations about emotional eating, mindset, and permanent weight loss for women 50+.

Follow Dara on Instagram: @dara_tomasson

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend and leave a review—it helps more women find freedom from the dieting cycle.

If you're ready to dig deeper into what is holding you back from achieving your weight loss goals, book a call with Dara to explore the options - Book a Call

Explore more about Dara's program HERE  

What if your struggle with weight isn't about discipline—but about centuries of conditioning?

In this thought-provoking episode, Dara Tomasson begins a powerful 4-part series exploring the historical roots of diet culture and why so many women feel stuck in cycles of food obsession, guilt, and frustration. By tracing patterns from early human survival to religious influence and societal expectations, Dara reveals how control and shame became deeply intertwined with food.

If you're a woman over 50 who has achieved success in many areas of life—but still feels stuck when it comes to your weight—this episode will help you finally start connecting the dots.

What You'll Learn in This Episode

• Why your brain is wired for survival, not restriction
• How early humans viewed body fat as protection—not a problem
• The original meaning of "diet" and how it's been distorted over time
• How religion introduced morality and shame into eating habits
• The role of control and power in shaping body expectations
• Why emotional eating, perfectionism, and people-pleasing are not random
• How understanding your patterns is the key to lasting weight loss

Key Insight
Your relationship with food didn't start with you. The guilt, the rules, the "starting over on Monday"—they're part of a much larger story. When you understand that, you can begin to change it in a sustainable, compassionate way.

Questions to Reflect On

• What is my unique story with food?
• What beliefs have I been carrying about my body and eating?
• Where might control be showing up in my habits?
• What if nothing has gone wrong—and this is something I can understand and change?

Free Coaching Invitation
If you're ready to uncover what's really driving your eating patterns and finally feel in control around food, Dara is offering a limited number of free 30-minute coaching sessions.

These calls are designed to help you gain clarity, identify what's been keeping you stuck, and explore your next steps toward lasting change.

Book you call here

About Dara's Love Yourself Thin Program
Dara's group coaching program is designed specifically for women 50+ who are ready to create permanent weight loss from the inside out.

Inside, you'll experience:

• Weekly live coaching calls for ongoing support and guidance
• A clear path to weight loss freedom in 90 days
• A supportive community of women committed to lasting change
• Tools to overcome emotional eating, perfectionism, and self-sabotage

This is not another diet—it's a new way of thinking, living, and relating to yourself.

Learn more HERE

What's Coming Next
In the next episode, Dara continues the historical deep dive—exploring the first diet trends, extreme weight loss methods, and how diet culture evolved into what we experience today.

Connect & Continue the Journey
If this episode resonated with you:

• Subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss the rest of this powerful series
• Follow Dara on Instagram: @dara_tomasson

Share this episode with a friend who's ready to stop dieting and start understanding.

Episode 250 is more than a milestone—it's a reflection of what becomes possible when you stop fighting yourself and start coming home to who you already are.

In this deeply personal episode, Dara shares a powerful shift: success doesn't come from doing more—it comes from quitting what's draining you.

Through a moving poem and real client story, you'll discover why willpower, self-criticism, and "proving yourself" have never worked… and what actually creates lasting change instead.

This episode will help you:

• Understand why self-criticism keeps you stuck (and what to replace it with)
• Learn what it really means to "quit" in a way that creates growth
• See how your thoughts directly impact your energy, habits, and results
• Shift from chasing worth to living from it
• Create goals from desire—not pressure, punishment, or proof

Dara also walks you through a simple but powerful 3-step process:

1. Your Quit List – releasing beliefs that drain your energy
2. Your Desire List – reconnecting with what you actually want
3. Your Plan Without Proving – taking action from wholeness, not lack

If you've ever felt stuck in cycles of starting over, this episode will show you a completely different way forward.

✨ You are not behind.
✨ You are not broken.
✨ You don't need to prove anything to be worthy of what you want.

If you're ready to go deeper, Dara invites you to explore this work inside her membership, where real transformation happens through changing your relationship with yourself. Book a call to learn more!

Have you ever wondered why you keep doing the same things with food—even when you know what to do?

In this episode, Dara Tomasson takes you inside the real work that leads to lasting change. You'll hear what actually happens inside her program and why weight loss isn't about willpower, discipline, or another plan—it's about understanding the patterns you've been practicing for decades.

Dara shares real client examples to show how childhood experiences, family dynamics, and old beliefs are still influencing your eating habits today. From late-night overeating to guilt around food, these patterns aren't random—they're learned.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why your struggle with food isn't a lack of discipline
• How childhood experiences shape your current habits
• What "be kind and rewind" really means—and how it helps you change
• The "domino buffering" pattern that keeps you stuck in cycles
• Why awareness is the first step—but not the full solution

This episode will help you see yourself with more compassion and clarity—and understand why nothing has worked long-term.

But awareness alone isn't what creates transformation.

Inside Dara's Lifetime Membership, this is the work you actually do.
You don't just learn concepts—you get coached through your specific patterns, in real time, so you can finally break the cycle with food.

If you're ready to stop fighting yourself and start creating lasting results, this is where that change happens.

Book a call with Dara to find out how she can help you!

Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review and share this episode!

If you've tried all the sleep tips and still struggle to get a good night's rest, this episode will help you understand what's really going on.

Dara shares why sleep isn't just about routines or habits—it's about your thinking patterns, unprocessed worries, and how your brain is trying to keep you safe.

Through a powerful client example, you'll learn how to calm a busy mind, reduce nighttime overthinking, and create the conditions your body needs for real rest.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why sleep struggles are often a thinking problem, not a habit problem
• How to separate what you can control vs. what you can't
• A simple "worry list" tool to quiet your mind
• How to stop fighting sleeplessness and reduce resistance
• Why better sleep supports weight loss, health, and productivity

If your brain won't "turn off" at night, this episode will give you a new way to approach sleep—with more calm, clarity, and control.

Want to continue this conversation? Book a call with Dara to find out how she can help you dive deeper into what's really going on so you can create the life you want! Book a call HERE.

Catch Dara at the Quilter's Life Summit April 21-23, 2026 where she will dive deeper into perfectionism, people pleasing and procrastination. Plus you can hear from 20+ other quilting experts as they share quilting tips and tricks. Sign up for free HERE.

Do you struggle to say no… and then find yourself drained, overwhelmed, or stuck doing things you don't actually want to do?

In this episode, Dara walks you through why saying no feels so uncomfortable—and how your childhood wiring, people-pleasing patterns, and fear of judgment keep you stuck over-explaining and overcommitting.

Through a powerful client story, you'll see how even small moments (like staying too long in a conversation) can quietly drain your energy and keep you disconnected from yourself.

You'll learn:

• Why your brain resists saying no
• How people-pleasing is tied to old thought patterns
• What guilt really is (and why it's optional)
• How to stop over-explaining and start honoring your needs
• Simple, practical ways to say no—without guilt

This episode will help you reclaim your time, protect your energy, and start showing up as the version of you that you actually want to be.

Key Takeaway:
"No" is a complete sentence—and learning to use it is one of the most powerful ways to change your life.

Next Steps:
Ready to stop people-pleasing, procrastinating, and overthinking? Join Dara's Masterclass at the end of April! Details are HERE.

Join Dara at the Quilter's Life Summit to hear more from her about perfectionism (and other quilting topics!) Registration opens April 7.

Book a call with Dara to continue the conversation! 

https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/contact 

Have you ever wondered why you keep putting things off—even when you know better?

Why you promise yourself you'll start tomorrow… and tomorrow keeps moving?

In this episode of Love Yourself Thin, Dara Tomasson explores the deeper reason behind procrastination and the repeating patterns that show up in our lives—especially around food, productivity, and weight loss.

If you've ever thought, "Why do I keep doing this?" or "Why can't I just follow through?" this conversation will help you understand what's really happening in your brain.

The truth is, procrastination isn't laziness. It's a pattern your brain learned a long time ago.

Many of the habits we struggle with today—emotional eating, perfectionism, people pleasing, procrastinating—were originally coping strategies we developed in childhood. They helped us deal with stress, pressure, or emotions when we didn't yet have the tools to process them.

The problem is that those same patterns can continue running our adult lives automatically.

Your brain isn't trying to improve your life—it's trying to keep things predictable.

That's why traditional weight loss strategies often fail. They focus on controlling behavior instead of understanding the underlying patterns driving it.

The good news? Your brain is capable of change at any age.

Modern neuroscience shows that the brain constantly forms new neural pathways through repetition and awareness. This means the same process that created your old patterns can also help you create new ones.

When you bring awareness to these patterns, the automatic cycle starts to break.

This is why willpower alone rarely works. You can't out-discipline a pattern you don't understand.

Instead of blaming yourself or trying harder, the real work is learning to look at the "wiring" behind your behaviors.

When you start noticing your patterns with curiosity instead of shame, real change becomes possible.

And that's where lasting weight loss begins—not with stricter rules, but with deeper awareness.

If you've ever felt stuck in cycles of procrastination, emotional eating, or perfectionism, this episode will help you understand why—and show you that it's never too late to change.

• Why procrastination is often a learned coping strategy from childhood

• How your brain prioritizes familiarity over improvement

• The neuroscience behind habit patterns and emotional eating

• Why willpower alone rarely solves behavior patterns

• How awareness can help break automatic cycles

• Why you are never too old to rewire your brain

Dara also shares details about the upcoming Quilter's Life Summit, where she will be teaching mindset tools to help quilters finish projects, reduce procrastination, and honor their time. There also will be 20 other presenters teaching on quilting topics that are sure to pique your interest! Register for free starting April 7, 2026!

If this episode resonated with you, be sure to subscribe to Love Yourself, Thin so you never miss an episode. And if you enjoyed the show, leaving a review helps more women discover these tools for lasting change.

Watch this episode (and more!) on YouTube - https://youtu.be/yITyRn1ExXM 

If you're ready to make lasting change, book a call with Dara to find out if her program is right for you - 

 https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/contact

As the seasons change, many of us feel a surge of energy, motivation, and excitement. But that same "spring fever" can also bring restlessness, impulsive decisions, and frustration—especially when it comes to our bodies, our habits, and our weight loss goals.

In this episode of Love Yourself Thin, Dara explores how the natural shift from winter to spring affects our mindset, our energy, and our relationship with food. Instead of falling into the familiar cycle of all-or-nothing thinking, Dara shares how you can use this seasonal transition to create real, sustainable change—without dieting, overthinking, or criticizing yourself.

You'll learn why simply trying harder doesn't solve emotional eating, how childhood patterns still influence your behavior today, and how to build self-trust so you can finally feel peaceful around food.

Spring is a season of new growth—and it can be an invitation for your own personal growth too.

• What "spring fever" really is and how it affects motivation and eating habits

• Why trying harder isn't the solution to emotional eating

• The problem with all-or-nothing thinking when it comes to weight loss

• How to recognize "buffering" behaviors like distraction, scrolling, or unnecessary tasks

• Why your childhood experiences shape your habits as an adult

• How learning to feel your emotions instead of avoiding them reduces overeating

• A simple 3-step process to break unhelpful patterns and create lasting change

Dara also shares details about the upcoming Quilter's Life Summit, a free 3-day event happening April 21–23.

You'll learn how to:

• Finish more creative projects

• Stop procrastinating

• Let go of perfectionism

• Enjoy the creative process without pressure

The summit includes incredible instructors and opportunities to connect with other creatives in a supportive environment. Registrations open April 7!

If this episode resonated with you, make sure to subscribe so you never miss a new episode of Love Yourself Thin, where Dara teaches women how to transform their relationship with food, weight, and themselves.

If you're ready to quit the yo-yo diets and find a weight loss protocol that works, book a call with Dara to find out if her program is right for you - 

https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/contact

Follow Dara on Instagram for more weight loss tips and tricks! @dara_tomasson

What if the things you're most proud of… are actually keeping you stuck?

In this episode of Love Yourself Thin, Dara explores the concept of acceptable buffering—the socially praised habits we use to avoid uncomfortable emotions. While many people think buffering only looks like scrolling social media or overeating, it can also show up as being the perfect wife, devoted mother, high achiever, or tireless homemaker.

These behaviors may look admirable on the outside, but they can quietly drain your energy and distract you from the deeper emotional work that leads to permanent weight loss.

Dara shares a powerful coaching story from inside her program that reveals how childhood patterns of seeking approval can shape the way we show up as adults. When we spend our lives trying to prove our worth through productivity, success, or caretaking, we often ignore the emotions underneath—and turn to food or other distractions to cope.

Instead of another diet or stricter willpower, Dara invites you to look inward and ask a deeper question:
What emotions am I avoiding, and how am I buffering them?

When you begin to notice these patterns with compassion and curiosity, real transformation becomes possible.

• What buffering really means and why it's more than just emotional eating

• How "acceptable" behaviors like overworking or people-pleasing can hide deeper struggles

• Why traditional diets fail to address the emotional roots of weight challenges

• How childhood approval patterns can influence your relationship with food and self-worth

• A simple daily exercise to help you identify where your time, energy, and mental focus are going

Permanent weight loss doesn't come from stricter rules around food—it comes from understanding your thoughts, emotions, and patterns. When you stop buffering and start processing your feelings with compassion, you gain the clarity and freedom needed to change your habits for good.

For one day, take a daily inventory of your thoughts and energy:

• What are you spending your time thinking about?

• Where is your mental energy going?

• Are you trying to prove your worth, or are you caring for yourself?

This awareness can reveal the hidden habits that are quietly influencing your health and your relationship with food.

If this episode resonated with you, consider exploring deeper support and tools through Dara's coaching programs, where you'll learn how to build healthier emotional patterns and create lasting change.

Learn more about Dara's program HERE.

Book a call with Dara to learn more about if she is a right fit for you HERE.

Get Dara's free self-assessment to help you figure out what thoughts are holding you back from losing weight HERE

If you regret certain choices you've made around food and you're not sure what to do about it, this episode is for you.

In this powerful conversation, Dara Tomasson explores the connection between regret and weight loss, and how unprocessed emotions can quietly shape your patterns with food for years. So many women believe weight struggles are a private failure — something shameful that should be handled alone. But when we begin talking openly about our experiences, something shifts. We relax. We feel hopeful. And real change becomes possible.

The Hidden Role of Perfectionism

Dara also explores how perfectionism acts as a protective shield. If we look perfect, perform perfectly, or take care of everyone else, maybe we won't be judged or rejected.

But perfectionism, procrastination, and people-pleasing are survival strategies — especially for women who learned early that acceptance meant safety. When perfectionism runs the show, weight loss becomes another arena to "prove" worthiness. And when perfectionism inevitably cracks, regret rushes in. Instead of seeing weight regain as data, we interpret it as failure.

Emotional Regulation Is the Missing Skill

At the heart of this episode is a powerful truth: many of us were never taught emotional regulation. We weren't shown how to feel disappointment. How to process bitterness. How to sit with regret without turning it into self-punishment. So we buffered. Food became an acceptable coping strategy — one that dampened noise, distracted from discomfort, and helped us survive.

But if we don't learn how to feel our feelings directly, no diet strategy will create lasting weight loss. The old coping mechanisms will return. Until we slow down and identify the survival patterns underneath — perfectionism, procrastination, people-pleasing — the system remains broken.

This episode is a compassionate reminder:

You are not bad.

You are not weak.

You are not incapable of change.

You simply didn't get the full picture.

When you begin to see how regret, perfectionism, and emotional avoidance have shaped your behaviors, you gain power. You move from shame to awareness. From autopilot to intentional growth. When you learn to process regret instead of reliving it, and practice emotional regulation instead of buffering, everything changes.

Listen in and start turning regret into growth.

Watch the YouTube video with Dr Benjamin Bikman - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NyFSkGMWP5Q

Connect with Dara:

Book a consult call to find out if her program is right for you - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/contact

Follow Dara on Instagram - @dara_tomasson

Check out Dara's upcoming live trainings - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/upcoming-classes-and-events

Have you ever caught yourself eating when not hungry and wondered, Why did I just do that?

In this episode, Dara Tomasson breaks down what's really happening during emotional eating, especially when it feels automatic or out of your control. If you've ever found yourself eating when full, reaching for food on autopilot, or stuck in patterns of compulsive eating, this conversation will help you understand why.

Your brain is wired for survival through something called the motivational triad: stay safe, seek pleasure, avoid pain. When stress, boredom, loneliness, or fear show up, your nervous system may turn to food before you're even consciously aware of it. That doesn't mean something is wrong with you — it means your brain is doing its job.

In this episode, you'll learn:

✔️Why eating on autopilot is a safety response

✔️How fear of failure, visibility, abandonment, or rejection can drive emotional eating

✔️The connection between tribal belonging and food 

✔️How to separate your actions from your identity

✔️Dara's 5-step "I don't know why I'm eating" protocol

This is not about shame. It's about awareness. When you pause, name the feeling, and consciously choose your next step, you move from autopilot into leadership over your own life.

If you're ready to go deeper, Dara is hosting a live Emotional Eating Masterclass where you'll practice these tools together and build the emotional intelligence needed to create lasting change. Sign up here - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/emotional-eating-class

You are not broken. You are wired for survival. And you can learn how to work with your brain instead of against it.

Connect with Dara:

Website: https://daratomasson.com

Instagram: @dara_tomasson

Book a Free Consult: https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/contact

Join Love Yourself Thin: https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/love-yourself-thin 

Boredom and restlessness are some of the most misunderstood reasons we overeat. We tell ourselves we're bored, but often what's really happening is that we're avoiding something—desire, growth, pride, even happiness.

In this episode, Dara unpacks what boredom is actually protecting you from, why food becomes the default solution, and how to create a simple boredom protocol that doesn't rely on self-control or shame. This one might make you uncomfortable—but that's exactly why you need to hear it.

• The definitions of bored vs. restless (and why the distinction matters)

• The real question: Why do you let yourself believe you're bored?

• What boredom is really protecting you from: happiness, success, feeling proud, confidence, connection

• The core issue underneath boredom eating: WORTHINESS

• The Bored Eating Protocol (5 simple steps)

• Where "bored" sits on the Emotional Wheel (under "bad" → bored → indifferent/apathetic)

• Alternative words for "I'm bored": unsatisfied, unhappy, confused, directionless, uncertain

1. Name it - "Oh, I'm telling myself I'm bored."

2. Question it - "Am I actually bored, or am I avoiding something?" (Go back to the definition: feeling weary because something is uninteresting or repetitive, a lack of stimulation)

3. Identify what you're avoiding - "What would I do right now if I believed I was worthy? If I didn't have to prove myself to anyone?"

4. Take one small action toward that thing - Not the whole project. Just one stitch. One phone call. One sentence.

5. Notice - How does it feel to move toward what you actually want instead of away from it?

Dara shares the memory of walking into her grandma's kitchen at age six during Christmas. There was a mountain of dishes—and her grandma was laughing and having a ball. No paper plates, just joy in the work.

That moment changed Dara's life: "You can take any job, any task, and decide if it's going to be awesome or not. I've never been bored in my life because I made that decision."

But her grandma didn't have the tools to deal with stress. She turned to Coke (calling it her "medicine"), food, and baking. She had a heart attack at 64.

This is why Dara does this work—so women don't have to keep beating themselves up and feeling trapped in their own bodies.

• Happiness - What if you pursued what you really wanted?

• Success - What if you actually finished that quilt and entered the show?

• Feeling proud - What if you achieved something and had to own it?

• Confidence - What if you believed in yourself?

• Connection - What if you put yourself out there?

Three Ways to Work with Dara:

1. Join Love Yourself Thin Membership - The full program with ongoing support and community

2. Emotional Eating Mini-Class - Free Masterclass

3. Free 20-Minute Consult - Book a call to identify what's blocking you (Dara shares that one woman got so much clarity in just 20 minutes from YouTube)

Watch this episode on YouTube!

Episode 241: Emotional Eating When You Don't Even Know Why You Ate - The most mysterious type of emotional eating, where we pull everything together.

Loneliness doesn't always look like being alone. Sometimes it shows up as feeling disconnected, unseen, or like you're carrying everything by yourself. If food has been your go-to in those moments, hear this clearly: It makes sense. Food was there for you. It gave comfort and relief when connection felt out of reach.

In this episode, you'll learn why eating when you feel lonely isn't a lack of self-control—it's a learned regulation tool. And more importantly, you'll discover how to create real connection without turning food into the only solution.

• The Emotional Wheel: How loneliness sits on the spectrum between sadness and feeling abandoned

• Why turning to food when you're lonely makes perfect biological sense (dopamine, vulnerability, and survival)

• The difference between true connection and false connection (and why social media feels like sugar)

• How to create true connection through physical, creative, and spiritual practices

• The 4-step process for building your relationship with yourself:

1. Recognize that 95% of your thoughts are on autoplay

2. Do a thought capture throughout the day

3. Question one belief you've been carrying

4. Curate that belief in your favor

Physical Connection:

• Hugs (even self-hugs—hand on heart, shoulders squeeze)

• Real conversations on the phone or in person

• Physical exercise (walking, dancing, stretching)

• Warmth practices (hot tub, heated car seat, fire, warm blankets)

Creative Connection:

• Sewing, quilting, knitting

• Playing music or singing

• Clay or Play-Doh

• Sand, gardening

Other Forms:

• Listening to music that moves you

• Making food mindfully for yourself or others

• Journaling

• Reaching out to one person (even just a text)

• Religious practice, prayer, meditation

Emotional Eating Mini-Class - The all-year-round version of Dara's hit holiday class, now with office hours where you can get expert coaching on concepts like "Pause Before Pantry." This isn't just another online class you hope to watch—the office hours make all the difference. Join the 3 day masterclass here - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/free-emotional-eating-masterclass 

• Website: 

  https://daratomasson.com

• Instagram: @dara_tomasson

• YouTube: Ask questions in the comments—Dara loves interacting with you!

• Leave a Podcast Review: It makes such a difference!

If you've ever reached for food when you're stressed and then immediately judged yourself for it, this episode is for you. Stress eating isn't a willpower problem—it's a nervous system response. Your brain is actually doing exactly what it was designed to do: protect you.

In this episode, you'll discover what stress actually does inside your body, why "I'll start fresh Monday" advice completely misses the mark, and the 5-step protocol that will help you close the mental and emotional loops that drain your energy and keep you stuck in overwhelm.

• Why your brain scans for danger 5x more than it looks for safety (and what this has to do with stress eating)

• The role of cortisol in triggering cravings for quick energy—salty, sugary, and fatty foods

• Why modern stress (deadlines, family conflict, financial worry) doesn't go away after you eat

• The "car analogy": You don't need to know how to fix your brain, but you do need to understand how it works

• The 5-step protocol for closing thought loops and creating permanent change:

1. Accept/Acknowledge

2. Ask

3. Action

4. Assess

5. Acclimatize

Emotional Eating Mini-Class - Learn how to handle emotional eating 24/7, 12 months of the year. This revamped class includes office hours where you can get personalized support. Join the free masterclass and learn more - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/free-emotional-eating-masterclass 

• Website: 

  https://daratomasson.com

• Instagram: @dara_tomasson

• Join Dara live for her next training! - 

  https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/upcoming-classes-and-events  

• Watch this episode and more on YouTube - https://youtu.be/x23lLj3rKIs 

We're ending January with the four words that can change your relationship with food, your body, and yourself forever.

In this episode, you're going to learn:

• Why "This will not stand" and "I will not give up" keep you locked in battle

• The clinic lobby story and why "calm down" never works — on anyone

• The real difference between addressing actions vs. needs

• The moment a therapist flipped the switch with one question

• How acknowledging emotions creates instant empathy and relief

• Why force creates resistance — and how it turns you into your own enemy

• The four most powerful words: "What do I need?"

• How to use this question to meet fundamental needs directly

• Why Connie Rice's work proves you cannot legislate behavior change

• How compassion turns enemies (even inner ones) into allies

Key Takeaway:
The next time you're face-to-face with cravings, resistance, or old patterns, don't attack yourself. Instead ask:
"What do I need?"
Those four words are where permanent weight loss truly begins.

Inside Love Yourself Thin, you'll learn to meet your needs, calm your brain, and build a life you love. This is where your repair, renewal, and long-term freedom begins — no matter your age, your history, or how long you've struggled.

I've done this myself, and I've helped hundreds of women do the same. You deserve that freedom too.

Learn more: https://daratomasson.com 

Catch more of Dara's free trainings, sign up here: https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/upcoming-classes-and-events 

Watch this episode (and more!) on YouTube - https://youtu.be/2ptWyMgnyq4 

Three weeks into January — this is the perfect moment to ask: Why do you want to lose weight? Your answer determines everything.

In this episode, you'll discover:

✔️Why your past "failures" don't diminish your worthiness

✔️The life-changing difference between "needing" to lose weight vs. "wanting" to

✔️Self-esteem vs. self-compassion — and why one abandons you when you fail

✔️How self-esteem traps you in conditional worth

✔️How self-compassion creates solid, stable self-worth that shows up when you need it most

✔️Why compassion is collaboration, not domination or punishment

✔️How new solutions appear when you stop trying to earn your value

✨The truth: you never had to earn the right to care for yourself

Key Takeaway: Your worth was decided long before your weight ever changed. You matter now. And from that place, you're allowed to want more for yourself.

Inside Love Yourself Thin, you'll learn how permanent weight loss comes from caring for yourself — not proving yourself. Learn more: https://daratomasson.com

Get the free Perfectionist Recovery Program Course Here - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/opt-in-perfectionist-recovery-mini-course

Follow Dara on Instagram @dara_tomasson

Mid-January is when most women feel the inner critic ramp up. If you're feeling the pressure, the comparison, the self-judgment — this episode will set you free.

You're about to learn:

• My personal story of losing 50 pounds by becoming my own ally

• Why fighting with yourself guarantees that everyone loses

• Kristin Neff's research on the brutal things we say to ourselves

• The Connie Rice story: 20 years of lawsuits vs. one compassionate question

• Why you cannot legislate behavior change — in yourself or anyone else

• How compassion led to a 70% drop in homicides in Watts

• The critical mindset shift from "What's wrong with me?" to "What do I need?"

• How collaboration with yourself unlocks solutions you couldn't see before

Key Takeaway:
Compassion isn't weakness — compassion is power. When you stop being your own enemy, everything gets easier.

Ready to stop the internal war?
Inside Love Yourself Thin, you get lifetime access to tools that transform you from critic to collaborator so change finally sticks.

Learn more: https://daratomasson.com

Take my self-assessment quiz to find out what subconscious food thoughts are holding you back from your weight loss goals - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/self-assessment-uncovering-subconscious-food-beliefs

Follow me on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/dara_tomasson 

Watch this episode (and more!) on my YouTube channel - https://youtu.be/7lbAPfmnWJg 

One week into the new year and you've probably been bombarded with diet ads. But here's the truth no one says out loud: The food isn't the problem.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why weight loss is a symptom — not the root problem

• The client story that exposes what's actually driving overeating

• The "gunman story" that explains why unmet needs escalate everything

• The four fundamental human needs your overeating may be trying to meet

• Why diets fail: you accidentally become your own enemy

• The bullseye model: separating actions from needs

• How to skip behavior battles and go straight to the underlying need

• The magical, life-changing question: "What do I need right now?"

Key Takeaway:
When your real needs are met — safety, comfort, connection, control — the urge to overeat dissolves.

Watch Stephen Trzeciak's TED Talk - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elW69hyPUuI 

Stop treating symptoms. Start solving the real problem.
Inside Love Yourself Thin, you'll learn how your brain, emotions, and body actually work together so permanent transformation feels possible… and peaceful.

Learn more: https://daratomasson.com 

Watch this episode, and more, on Dara's YouTube channel - https://youtu.be/7lbAPfmnWJg 

Follow Dara on Instagram - 

https://www.instagram.com/dara_tomasson 

Happy New Year! If you're starting January thinking, "Why does this feel exactly like last year?" — this episode will change how you see yourself forever.

Inside this episode, you'll learn:

• Why you don't have a knowledge problem — you have a thinking problem

• The neuroscience behind follow-through (hint: it's not about willpower)

• How your reptilian brain's threat-defense system quietly sabotages you

• How self-criticism triggers cortisol and shuts down motivation

• How to activate the mammalian caregiving system so change feels easier

• A powerful father/son example that proves compassion fuels real progress

• The pivotal shift from "What should I do?" to "What do I need?"

Watch Kristen Neff's Ted Talk

Key Takeaway:
When you meet your needs with compassion instead of criticism, action stops feeling like a battle — and starts feeling natural.

If you're done blaming yourself and ready to finally understand why you struggle with follow-through, come join me in Love Yourself Thin. This is where the "great dilemma" finally ends.

You get lifetime access to the tools that help you understand your brain, meet your needs, and create permanent weight loss without force, shame, or burnout.

Kickstart your weight loss this January with my new course! Details here - Permanent Weight Loss from the Inside Out

Grab my new freebie to help you understand why you can't lose weight - Uncovering Subconscious Food Beliefs

Watch this episode on YOUTUBE

The black girdle hanging in your closet. The jeans you promise yourself you'll wear "this Christmas." The drive to your family's house wearing shapewear so tight you can't breathe, feeling ashamed the entire night because you're not "good enough" to wear those jeans. If this story sounds painfully familiar, this special Christmas episode is my gift to you—because you deserve to stop hiding behind Spanx and start actually enjoying your life.

After struggling with my weight since my early twenties, I finally cracked the code of permanent weight loss in a way I never expected. On my 52nd birthday, I tried on my wedding dress and weighed 12 pounds less than on my wedding day. I also fit into the bridesmaid dress I wore at 16. But here's what nobody tells you: weight loss isn't the goal. Weight gain is a symptom of unaddressed emotional issues. Until you dig into the real patterns—the loneliness that makes you reach for baked goods, the fear of being kicked out of the tribe if you don't eat chocolate with your coffee group, the perfectionism that keeps you paralyzed—no app or diet will ever work long-term.

This week, I'm sharing the most vulnerable stories from my Conquer Emotional Eating class: the retired woman who's "really good all day" but needs that cookie every night (spoiler: it's not about the cookie), the coffee group that bonds over complaining about weight while eating chocolate (what happens if you break the pattern?), and the perfectionist who couldn't start her workbook because she was afraid to use pen instead of pencil. Plus, I'm getting deeply honest about my own Christmas Eve girdle story—the shame, the uncomfortable drive, the shadow of "not good enough" that ruined what should have been joyful family time.

My Christmas gift to you: Stop wasting time on Pinterest boards and apps. Join my January course (starts January 9th) where I teach the same content I'm doing inside my Love Yourself Thin lifetime membership program—how to make goals out of love, not shame in a condensced way. Get all the details HERE.

Or join the lifetime program itself and pay once for life. Your worth has nothing to do with your pants size. Let's prove it together. Join HERE.

Want to see Dara's girdle 😅 Watch this episode on YouTube!

Follow Dara on social media @dara_tomasson

You know exactly what you should eat. You know you need eight hours of sleep. You know you should move your body. Yet here you are at 10 PM with a pint of ice cream, wondering why you can follow through on work deadlines and family responsibilities but can't stick to your own health goals. The disconnect isn't about willpower—it's about how you talk to yourself when things don't go according to plan.

This week, I'm breaking down how to have actual peace during the holidays with your weight loss goals—not the fake "I'll start in January" peace that's really just procrastination wrapped in holiday lights. You'll discover why your approach to failure determines everything about whether you'll succeed, how the same encouragement you'd give a five-year-old learning to tie shoes is exactly what you need to give yourself, and why your battlefield-like inner self-talk is the real reason you sabotage your own goals. I'll share Brené Brown's marble jar concept and how I adapted it for building self-trust with urges, plus my own vulnerable story about catching myself in diet mentality last Friday even after years of doing this work.

Tune in as I walk you through the three pillars of peaceful goal-setting: making goals with possibility instead of fear, understanding the real science of how your brain and body connect, and implementing practical strategies that actually create change. You'll learn why 99% of diets fail (and why beating yourself up guarantees you'll be part of that statistic), discover the power of accountability partnerships inside my program, and understand why all the Pinterest boards and saved recipes in the world won't create permanent change without addressing your unique baggage.

Ready to stop saying "I'll start in January" and actually mean it? My January course starting January 9th teaches you how to make goals without the failure spiral, or join my lifetime membership program for ongoing support and accountability. Details are HERE!

What You'll Learn in this Episode:

• How your experience with failure shapes your ability to make goals

• The five-year-old shoe-tying analogy: when did you stop letting yourself learn?

• Why your inner dialogue sounds like screaming at a child (and how to stop)

• The connection between Christmas anticipation and post-holiday letdown

• How negative self-talk creates procrastination, people-pleasing, and perfectionism

• Brené Brown's marble jar concept adapted for building self-trust with urges

• Why feelings only come from thoughts (even when circumstances feel urgent)

• Peace-building thoughts: "I can do hard things" and "I haven't figured this out yet"

• Dara's vulnerable Friday story: catching diet mentality after years of coaching

• Why 99% of diets fail and how to be in the 1%

• The power of accountability partners and real-time coaching

• Why Pinterest boards and saved recipes won't create permanent change

• How program connections help women through devastating losses

Stay in touch!

• January goal-setting course (starts January 9th) - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/permanent-weight-loss-course 

• Love Yourself Thin lifetime membership - 

  https://daratomasson.com 

• Email us your questions - support@daratomasson.com

• Watch this episode (and more!) on YouTube

• Follow me on Instagram - @dara_tomasson

You can quit alcohol. You can quit drugs. You can delete the apps and walk away. But you can't quit food—which is exactly why weight loss feels so impossibly hard. You need to eat multiple times a day, every single day, for the rest of your life. So how do you navigate holiday eating without gaining weight or feeling deprived when "just don't eat it" isn't an option?

This week, I'm tackling the biggest misconception about food and addiction. Unlike substances you can eliminate completely, food requires a completely different strategy because you can't go cold turkey.

You'll discover why your "it's go time" thoughts during the holidays trigger cortisol that makes you crave carbs, why 95% of your subconscious thoughts are sabotaging your best intentions, and how to redirect yourself when you can't just walk away from food forever. I'll share my German chocolate cake story—how I enjoyed my favorite birthday cake all week without guilt by planning 24 hours in advance, proving you can have your cake and lose weight too.

Tune in as I break down the five pillars to permanent weight loss (spoiler: it starts with understanding simple hormone science), reveal why sneaking food feels thrilling at first but destroys self-trust long-term, and explain the Santa's elves analogy that shows exactly what happens when you overload your body with flour and sugar. You'll learn why flour and sugar need a six-week break, how to become the traffic controller of your own holidays, and the critical difference between numbing negative thoughts with food versus actually feeling your feelings.

Ready to stop making false promises about January? My January course starting January 9th teaches you how to actually keep resolutions instead of breaking them by February. Details are HERE 

What You'll Learn in this Episode:

✔️Why you can't go cold turkey with food (and what to do instead)

✔️How "it's go time" thoughts trigger cortisol and carb cravings

✔️Why 95% of your thoughts are subconscious and sabotaging you

✔️The traffic controller strategy: taking charge of your own holidays

✔️Why we turn to certain foods (numbing, stress, avoiding feelings)

✔️The six-week flour and sugar break strategy (and why it works)

✔️How to plan food 24 hours in advance and enjoy it guilt-free

✔️The German chocolate cake story: birthday cake all week without guilt

✔️Why sneaking food is like having an affair (thrilling but destructive)

✔️The Santa's elves analogy: what happens when you overload your body

✔️Five pillars to permanent weight loss (weight loss science, your eating plan, feeling feelings, taking responsibility, building confidence)

✔️How to stop blaming others and take your power back

For more support, jump into Dara's program where you will get weekly coaching calls and encouragements from her. Details HERE 

If you haven't checked out Dara's free masterclass to help you create your peaceful, productive Christmas, get in on it HERE 

The picture of your grandmother holding your baby. The lifesaver candies that remind you of Grandpa. The empty chair at Christmas dinner. The holidays magnify grief in ways that send you straight to the kitchen at midnight, eating to fill a void that food can never actually fill.

If you've lost someone close to you and the holidays feel impossible—caught between wanting to honor happy memories while drowning in sadness—you're navigating something most people won't talk about.

We've been conditioned like Pavlov's dogs to associate food with love, celebration, and connection. When someone dies, especially around the holidays, those associations become a tangled mess that feels impossible to unravel without abandoning the memories altogether.

This week, I'm breaking down what's really happening when grief and food become intertwined during the holidays. You'll discover why your brain defaults to emotional eating when you miss someone (hint: it's pure conditioning, not a character flaw), learn the difference between honoring someone's memory and using food to avoid feeling sad, and hear practical examples of how real families have transformed grief into meaningful traditions that don't require eating your feelings. I'll share the "Mike and Hazel Bowie" story from my own family and how one client processes her father's passing through daddy-daughter photo time instead of emotional eating.

Ready to stop letting grief sabotage your health goals? Join my Conquer Emotional Eating class where you'll get real tools to navigate the holidays without using food to fill emotional voids. Check it out HERE

Plus, my January class on making goals without beating yourself up starts January 9th—because this year can actually be different. Details are HERE

What You'll Learn in this Episode:

🎄Why food and family memories are enmeshed (and how to separate them)

🎄The Pavlov's dog effect: how we've been conditioned to associate food with love and celebration

🎄How to feel sadness appropriately without being afraid of the emotion

🎄The critical question: What do you actually miss about that person? (This reveals how to fill the void)

🎄Why filling emotional voids with food leads to devastating health consequences

🎄Real examples of honoring loved ones through meaningful traditions (not food)

🎄The "Mike and Hazel Bowie" golf and bowling tradition that keeps memories alive

🎄How one 65-year-old client handled job loss and hip replacement surgery completely differently than four years ago

🎄Why taking care of yourself isn't selfish—it's the legacy you're creating

If you are ready to take the next step in creating the life you want with Dara's help, join her lifetime membership program, Love Yourself Thin. Because loving yourself is the first step to lasting change. Details are HERE

Follow Dara on Instagram @dara_tomasson

The holidays arrive with the best intentions. You have a vision—homemade gifts, a beautifully decorated home, healthy eating habits maintained through January. Then your husband loses his job. You're told you need a new hip. The test results come back concerning. And suddenly it's 10 PM and you're eating ice cream straight from the container, wondering why you can't just stick to the plan like everyone else seems to.

This week, I'm breaking down why the holidays create the perfect storm for emotional eating, overspending, and complete overwhelm. But here's the twist: generic "holiday stress hacks" won't solve your problem because you don't know YOUR unique trigger pattern. Most women are following someone else's playbook instead of understanding what actually sends them into the kitchen at 3 PM or keeps them scrolling Pinterest until midnight.

Tune in as I walk you through identifying your personal coping strategies when life throws curveballs (because it will), introduce the game-changing concept of "bare minimum Christmas," and share how one of my clients catered an entire guild party—two days of cooking and serving—without stressing once.

You'll discover why the highs and lows of your holiday experience reveal everything about your emotional regulation, and learn the exact framework for building resiliency so December doesn't derail you every single year.

Want to cut your emotional eating in half this holiday season? Join my Conquer Holiday and Emotional Eating class starting now. You'll get all the modules, office hours to ask questions, and lifetime access for two years. Real tools, real help, real transformation—one Christmas cookie at a time. Check it out here - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/emotional-eating-course

What You'll Learn in this Episode:

🎄Why the holidays are a perfect storm for triggers (nostalgia, pressure to perform, family dynamics, and lack of self-trust)

🎄The "straight line vs. reality" of holiday planning and why your highs and lows reveal your emotional regulation

🎄How to identify YOUR unique coping strategies when life doesn't go according to plan

🎄The "bare minimum Christmas" exercise that diffuses overwhelm immediately 

🎄Why spreading your joy across 9 life categories (not just relationships or food) creates resilience

🎄How one client transformed from holiday stress to catering a guilt party without any anxiety

🎄The real reason you can't follow through on your plans (spoiler: it's not willpower)

If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow my YouTube channel for more. And keep up with me on Instagram @dara_tomasson 

Discover why the same thinking patterns that create relationship problems also drive emotional eating. Through the story of Tammy, a program member stuck in a cycle of resentment and people-pleasing, learn how to stop living in other people's imaginary thoughts and start expressing your own needs clearly and kindly.

What You'll Learn 

✔️The Resentment-Food Connection: Why unexpressed relationship frustration drives emotional eating

✔️Creating "Cases" Against People: How we decide what others think without asking them

✔️The Exhausting Cycle: Resentment → Rebellion → Guilt → People-pleasing → More resentment 

✔️Story vs. Reality: Why Tammy felt guilt about quilting but not about attending a funeral

✔️Breaking Free: Practical tools to distinguish your thoughts from others' thoughts

Key Teaching Points 

1. Same Patterns, Different Areas: The thinking that creates relationship problems also drives emotional eating - we create stories instead of dealing with reality.

2. Living in Others' Heads: When we try to manage others' feelings and predict their reactions, we lose access to our own wisdom.

3. The Lawyer Analogy: We create "cases" against people, spending all our mental energy looking for evidence to support our predetermined story.

4. You're Not Responsible for Others' Emotions: Your job is to express your needs kindly and clearly, not to manage how others respond.

Remember: You're not responsible for managing other's emotions. Their reaction is information about their ability to self-soothe, stay in your own emotional lane while being loving and kind!

For more support on this, join my membership where you will get the tools you need to break your cycle of feeling obligated to please everyone around you at the expense of yourself! - https://daratomasson.com

Also, if you are interested in learning why you keep purchasing fabric (don't worry you aren't alone!) get this free course - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/why-you-keep-buying-fabric

Connect with Dara on Instagram - @dara_tomasson

Discover the fascinating science behind gratitude and how it can literally change your brain chemistry to help you make better food choices. In this episode, Dara explores research from Harvard, UCLA, and other major universities showing how gratitude releases the same feel-good chemicals as comfort food - without the calories.

Key Takeaways

🔑Willpower is Limited: Like a cell phone battery, willpower depletes throughout the day

🔑Gratitude Replenishes: Shifts you from depletion to abundance state Three Before Three: Practice gratitude 3 times daily before eating

🔑Savoring Matters: Notice and appreciate good moments as they happen

🔑Foundation Change: You're not just changing one behavior, but the foundation all behaviors spring from

Try This Week The "Three Before Three" Practice:

Three times a day, before you eat anything, take 30 seconds to think of three things you're genuinely grateful for. They can be tiny things: 

That you have food That you have taste buds to enjoy it

That you have people to share it with (or peace to enjoy alone) 

That you have electricity, a house, warmth

Get on the waitlist for the Black Friday Offer - Cut Your Emotional Eating in Half. Hurry, spots will fill up fast! - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/emotional-eating-course

Ready to join the lifetime membership with exclusive coaching access with Dara? Check it out here - www.daratomasson.com

Follow Dara on IG and Pinterest for more:

Instagram: @dara_tomasson

Pinterest: https://pin.it/6DkwKmfTp

Feeling that familiar knot in your stomach about Thanksgiving dinner (or any upcoming event)? Not just about family dynamics, but about the actual food?

This episode gives you practical tools to enjoy Thanksgiving dinner without the emotional food hangover - the shame, regret, and "I can't believe I did it again" feeling that can last for days. Dara walks you through her proven 4-step process to prepare for any eating event from a place of self-compassion instead of self-control.

Key Topics Covered

🗝️Why "Being Good" Before the Event Backfires

🗝️How restricting before dinner triggers scarcity mode in your brain

🗝️The "I've been good, now I can be bad" mentality trap

🗝️Why showing up hungry makes balanced eating nearly impossible

Practical Strategies Shared

Before the Event: 

Eat normally - don't try to "save" calories Remember: this is one meal, not your last meal

During the Event:

Put food on a plate instead of grazing while standing 

Check in with hunger and fullness during the meal

Give yourself permission to enjoy foods you want AND skip foods you don't

Have a plan for what to do with your hands during conversations

Connect with Dara

Website: https://daratomasson.com

Instagram: @dara_tomasson

Ever wonder why you keep buying fabric when you already have enough for three lifetimes? This isn't about budgeting or organizing your stash - it's about understanding what you're really shopping for.

In this episode, Dara explores the emotional drivers behind fabric shopping and how the same patterns that create overflowing fabric stashes also drive emotional eating and other distracting behaviors.

Key Topics Covered

The Real Problem: Thinking, Not Knowledge Why you don't have a knowledge problem - you have a thinking problem

How emotional distraction shows up as shopping, eating, scrolling, and staying busy

The connection between fabric shopping and emotional eating patterns

Four Emotions That Drive Fabric Shopping:

✔️Stress Relief - That gorgeous new collection feels like a promise of peace

✔️Excitement Management - Buying fabric feels like taking action on excitement ✔️Boredom/Emptiness - Shopping gives us something to focus on when feeling restless ✔️Connection Seeking - Buying what others have feels like joining the community

Are you ready to dive deeper into this? Then get in on Dara's FREE Mini Course: 12 Mini Lessons on Why We Have So Much Extra Fabric 

Special November offering: Emotional Eating Course - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/holiday-sprint

Connect with Dara:

Website: daratomasson.com Instagram: @dara_tomasson 

In this episode, Dara addresses the root cause of weight struggles: our inability to process emotions healthily due to childhood conditioning that taught us feelings were dangerous or weak.

Key Topics Covered:

• Childhood emotional suppression: How messages like "If you wanna cry, I'll give you something to cry about" create adults who lack healthy emotional coping strategies

• Unhealthy vs. healthy coping strategies: Recognition that we all developed coping mechanisms - they just weren't serving us

• Body wisdom and emotional storage: Where emotions land in the body according to ancient wisdom traditions (Ayurvedic, Chinese medicine)

• Personal breakthrough story: Dara's vulnerable sharing about discovering inherited fear of success through body awareness

• The feeling process: Understanding that emotions are just vibrations from thoughts that take 10-20 seconds to process when done correctly

The Coping Strategy Revelation:

🧠A successful client realized she didn't lack coping strategies - she had many unhealthy ones:

✔️Saying yes when wanting to say no

✔️Self-criticism after mistakes

✔️Food rewards and numbing

✔️Exhausting people-pleasing ✔️Late-night phone scrolling

✔️Overeating until uncomfortable

Main Takeaways:

Weight struggles aren't about food - they're about missing emotional life skills never taught in childhood

Feelings are safe - they're just temporary body vibrations that process quickly when allowed

Your emotional style is unique - don't compare your way of feeling to others 

The body keeps score - unexpressed emotions can manifest as physical symptoms and weight retention

Action Step: Notice where you feel tension or discomfort in your body and get curious about what emotion or situation might be stored there, without judgment.

Join Dara for Cut Emotional Eating in Half Over the Holidays (and Beyond) — a 2-week live experience to calm your brain, stop stress-eating, and feel confident around food. Join here - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/holiday-sprint 

In this deeply vulnerable episode, Dara explores why we resist the very tools that could transform our lives, using a client's confession about avoiding thought downloads as the starting point for understanding our patterns of self-sabotage.

Key Topics Covered:

🗝️The paradox of resistance: Why we rebel against ourselves by buying unnecessary fabric, saying yes when overwhelmed, or avoiding helpful practices

🗝️Family history revelation: Dara's discovery of her great-grandfather's traumatic childhood and how it illuminates our tendency to run from difficult emotions

🗝️The boogeyman effect: How avoidance makes problems seem bigger and more frightening than they actually are

🗝️Shame as a mushroom: Understanding how shame grows in darkness and secrecy, but loses power when brought into the light

🗝️The five pillars framework: Weight loss science, making your own eating plan, feeling feelings instead of eating them, taking 100% responsibility, and building self-confidence

Key Insights:

🔑Resistance is information - When we avoid something, it's usually because we're afraid of what we might discover

🔑Worth isn't tied to results - Your value remains 100% regardless of weight loss success or failure

🔑Vulnerability neutralizes shame - Speaking our fears aloud removes their power over us

🔑Avoidance amplifies problems - Whatever we resist grows bigger in our minds 

Action Step: Identify one tool or practice you've been avoiding and ask yourself: "What am I afraid I might find?" Then gently explore that fear with curiosity rather than judgment.

Special Offer: 25-minute free coaching sessions (5 slots available in one session) to help identify sabotage patterns and create holiday success plans. Book Here 

Check out my free webinars happening in October - Webinars

In this episode of the Quilter's Coach Podcast, Dara explores why food has become the "old faithful" in so many women's lives and provides a roadmap for changing this dynamic.

Key Topics Covered:

🗝️The reliability factor: Unlike relationships with people that can be unpredictable or disappointing, food provides consistent comfort and never "abandons" us

🗝️Childhood coping strategies: How early experiences with scarcity, emotional neglect, or family dysfunction create patterns where food becomes our primary emotional outlet

🗝️The counterfeit friend concept: Understanding how we use food to fill emotional needs that should be met through self-compassion, presence, and healthy coping strategies

Member success story: A powerful example of learning to eat mindfully after spousal loss, including a touching moment with a Red House Finch that appeared as a symbol of good fortune

Main Takeaways:

✔️You don't have a knowledge problem - you have a thinking problem. Most women know what to eat; they struggle with why they eat.

✔️Diets fail because they address the wrong problem. Restricting food without addressing the emotional relationship will always lead to rebounds.

✔️Food relationships are unique to each person. Whether it's the crunch of chips, the comfort of ice cream, or the companionship of popcorn during TV time, each person has specific emotional connections.

Struggling with the snacking and want some healthy alternatives? Try this Healthy Food Swap Guide

Want to try a coaching call? Dara is offering free coaching calls this month so you can get a taste of what is possible. There are a limited number of spots available so be sure to book your time slot now! This free opportunity doesn't happen often so don't miss out. Book HERE 

In this deeply personal episode, Dara reveals how her childhood struggle with mathematics became the foundation for her revolutionary approach to weight loss coaching.

Key Topics Covered:

✔️The French immersion math disaster: How ambitious goals without proper fundamentals led to years of struggle and self-doubt

✔️The memorization trap: Why trying to follow steps without understanding concepts creates frustration in both math and weight loss

✔️Emotional self-preservation modes: How trauma responses (fight, flight, freeze, people-please) keep us stuck in cycles of avoidance

✔️The teaching breakthrough: How becoming a math teacher finally revealed the missing fundamentals and transformed Dara's relationship with the subject

The Weight Loss Connection: Dara draws powerful parallels between struggling with math and struggling with weight loss:

✨Both involve missing fundamental skills (emotional regulation vs. mathematical concepts)

✨Both trigger shame and "I'm broken" narratives

✨Both can be solved by going back to build proper foundations

✨Both require self-compassion during the learning process

Main Takeaways:

🗝️You're not broken - you're missing fundamentals. Weight loss isn't about willpower; it's about building emotional regulation skills.

🗝️Avoidance keeps you stuck. Just like avoiding math homework, avoiding difficult feelings maintains the problem.

🗝️Curiosity beats perfectionism. The member who keeps asking for help with bread is making more progress than someone who gives up.

🗝️Small traumas create big patterns. Childhood experiences of feeling "not smart enough" can drive decades of self-sabotage.

Perfect for: Anyone who feels "broken" around food, women who've tried every diet without lasting success, and those ready to address the emotional fundamentals of weight loss rather than just the surface behaviors.

Action Step: Identify one area where you feel defeated and ask yourself: "What fundamentals might I be missing?" instead of "What's wrong with me?"

Ready to take it the next step further? Book a call with Dara or jump into her program and discover your next breakthrough! Check out all the support options HERE 

Also, don't forget to sign up for the Quilter's Life Summit - a free virtual summit that runs from October 21-23, 2025. Sign up HERE

Watch this episode on YouTubeHow Hating Math Will Guarantee Your Next Breakthrough (Yes, Really)

In this transformative episode, Dara introduces "The Golden Pen" - a powerful tool for rewriting the stories that keep us stuck in cycles of self-sabotage and weight regain.

The Golden Pen Process:

Step 1 - Raw Writing: Write out your current story without judgment. Let all the victim language flow onto paper.

Step 2 - Curious Questioning: Why might others behave the way they do? Is there any truth worth examining in criticism? How would different people interpret this situation?

Step 3 - Intentional Rewriting: Consciously choose how you want to think about your circumstances, putting yourself back in the driver's seat of your life.

Main Takeaways:

✒️Everything is a story - and you get to choose which version serves you best

✒️You always get the last word because it's your life and your interpretation

✒️Perspective is power - changing how you see situations changes how you respond to them 

✒️Success must be self-created - following someone else's plan won't create lasting change

Perfect for: Women who feel like victims of their circumstances, anyone stuck in repetitive self-sabotage patterns, and those ready to take ownership of their transformation journey.

Ready for more? Check out all my webinars happening in October! You don't want to miss them

And...the Quilter's Life Summit returns this fall, October 21-23, 2025! With 30 presenters, prizes and exclusive offers, you won't want to miss this event. Sign up now - Quilter's Life Summit

Watch this episode on YouTube

Have you ever bought something — a class, a program, a tool — full of hope…
Only to feel regret, resentment, or disillusionment when it didn't work the way you thought it would?

You're not alone.

In this episode, Dara explores what's really going on when we feel let down by something we've invested in — and how those emotions are often rooted in a misunderstanding of what we expected from ourselves.

From quilting tools to coaching programs, from parenting regrets to free-motion quilting frustration, Dara walks you through a powerful reframing:

• Why resentment is a sign of unmet expectations

• How to label your emotions honestly so you can move through them

• The sneaky way perfectionism and victimhood can keep you stuck

• What Elizabeth Gilbert, chocolate chip cookies, and Christmas planning all have in common

• Why your emotional weight must be addressed before lasting physical change can happen

If you want to stop abandoning yourself every time something feels hard — this episode will help you turn pain into perspective, and regret into power.

Want to see the power of coaching in a free live coaching call? Grab your spot (this is a limited time offer!) - https://dara-tomasson-coaching.mykajabi.com/sample-coaching-calls 

Or if you want to take the next step and see if Dara is the right coach for you, book a free curiosity call with her - 

https://connectwithdara.as.me/schedule/c1f1dcdc/appointment/26364389/calendar/6005908?appointmentTypeIds[]=26364389 

Stop outsourcing your power! Learn why constantly asking "just tell me what to do" keeps you stuck in weight loss and life goals. Discover how to become your own expert and trust yourself for lasting results.

• The "How Greed" Problem - Why expert dependency kills results
• Good vs Bad Pressure - Diamonds or crushed cans?
• Member Win - From Starbucks rewards to real connection
• 5 Pillars of Permanent Weight Loss - Build your own foundation

1. Stop asking "just tell me what to do" - Build foundational knowledge instead
2. You already know how to learn - Look at your quilting/hobby skills
3. Pressure can create or destroy - Internal motivation vs external shame
4. Become your own scientist - Test, adjust, repeat with YOUR results

1. Weight Loss Science (simple basics)
2. Make Your Own Eating Plan
3. Feel Your Feelings Instead of Eating Them
4. Take Responsibility (no shame/blame)
5. Build Self-Confidence

"The more you outsource answers, the less you actually learn for yourself. When you trust others more than yourself, you never get the results you want."

• Book a Curiosity Call with Dara
• Join Love Yourself Thin and start your transformation!

Subscribe & Share if this resonated with you!
New episodes every week on weight loss mindset for quilters and creative women.

Watch this episode on YouTube

Do you know what to do… but still fall short of your goals, again and again?

In this episode, Dara breaks down a concept that might just change everything: failure tolerance — your ability to try something, not get it quite right, and keep going without making it mean something terrible about you.

Using her own vulnerable story of struggling with Instagram (yes, even as a coach), Dara reveals the emotional trap so many of us fall into: showing up like "good students" instead of empowered women. She shares what finally shifted for her, how she's applying this mindset to her current goals, and how you can build your own tolerance to failure — the essential skill for lasting weight loss, creative growth, and real life transformation.

You'll hear:

• Why being "a good student" doesn't guarantee results

• How perfectionism sneaks in as resentment, shame, and powerlessness

• Why failure is not personal — it's essential

• The difference between diet thinking and growth thinking

• How to start failing forward instead of spiraling

If you want to stop living on autopilot and start rowing your own boat — this is your episode.

Ready to change the way you think about weight loss? Book a call with me to find out why you aren't seeing the results you want.

Or better still, jump into my membership for the full transformation!

And...my webinar about working WITH your hormones (not against them) is happening Septmeber 17, sign up for free HERE

What's the big deal about a masterclass? Can an hour a day really make a difference?

In this powerful episode, Dara walks you through exactly what happens inside her masterclasses — and why the experience can shift your thinking, your self-awareness, and even your identity.

You'll learn:

• Why real change starts with understanding your brain, not just your habits

• How journaling, community, and coaching combine to unlock powerful insights

• What makes women finally stop blaming their past and start owning their future

This isn't just education. It's excavation.

If you've been circling the idea of attending a training, this episode will help you see exactly what's possible — and why staying "safe" might be costing you the life you actually want.

And if you're ready to jump in, join my next webinar on September 17, I can't wait to see you there 🩵

And for more about me and what I offer, check out my website!

Don't forget to check out this episode and more on my YouTube channel.

Back-to-school season isn't just for kids — it's the perfect time for women to hit refresh and redefine who they want to be. In this powerful episode, Dara dives into five identity myths from Dr. Benjamin Hardy's Personality Isn't Permanent and how believing these myths keeps women stuck in old patterns of people-pleasing, overeating, overspending, and playing small.

You'll learn how to:

• Debunk the myth that your personality is fixed or defined by your past

• Reclaim authorship over who you're becoming

• Use autumn energy to commit to growth and emotional rewiring

You'll also hear real stories of Dara and her clients who are making brave changes — like saying no to people-pleasing and sugar, and yes to connection, calm, and courage.

👉 If you're craving a reset and want to stop feeling like a failure every time fall rolls around, this is your episode.

Ready to do some personality growth? Book a call with me to talk about how I can help! 

Don't delay, sign up for my free webinar "Why Weight Loss is Harder After Forty"

When every celebration feels like a food fest, the aftermath—guilt, bloat, weight gain—can overshadow the joy. In this episode, Dara shares how to shift the spotlight off food and onto true connection, belonging, and meaning.

You'll hear stories of clients who broke free from the emotional grip food had on their celebrations and finally learned to belong to themselves instead. Dara also shares her own story of navigating her anniversary trip while sticking to a personal goal—not out of restriction, but from love and self-respect.

She'll guide you through:

• Why food has become the default celebration tool—and how to change that

• The simple swaps and mindset shifts that actually work

• How to honor yourself and stay committed to goals without shame

• Why connection, not calories, is what we're really hungry for

You don't need to villainize food to stop using it for false connection. You just need to rewire your relationship with celebration—and this episode will show you how.

Sign up for my free webinar - Why Weight Loss is Harder After 40

Have a wedding, anniversary, or big event coming up and want to feel amazing in the pictures—but without falling into the shame spiral of diet culture? In this episode, Dara shares a refreshing, no-nonsense 5-step approach to weight loss that actually sticks. She'll show you why the "how" matters more than the number on the scale, and how chasing validation through weight loss never leads to lasting peace.

You'll learn:

• Why liking your reason is step one (and why that's NOT selfish)

• The power of getting the right kind of help (hint: not your fudge-pushing friends)

• What 100% commitment really looks like

• How discomfort is the price of real transformation

• Why coaching, not criticism, is the game-changer

Whether you're walking down the aisle, celebrating 30 years, or just want to feel proud of how you show up in life—this episode is your loving, firm push in the right direction.

Follow Dara on social media for more @dara_tomasson

Sign up for Dara's free webinar "Why Weight Loss is Harder After 40" - HERE

As a bonus, grab her Free Food Swaps guide to help you in making food choices!

Watch this episode on YouTube

How would you describe yourself? How would you describe your identity if someone asked you? In this episode, we explore how the way you think about yourself affects the successes you have in life. If you're ready to look at how you can change your identity and have the results you want, this episode is for you.

• The shocking story of a young man who received the wrong SAT score and how it changed his entire life trajectory
• Why personality tests are a $2 billion industry (and what that tells us about human nature)
• The difference between fixed mindset and growth mindset - and which one leads to transformation
• How to create powerful identity shifts that make lasting change inevitable
• Why your personality isn't permanent (and how to use that to your advantage)

Celebrating a member who quit her day job to go all-in on her quilting business! She knows she has the support from Dara and the entire membership community, and more importantly, she understands that she's the one who was keeping herself from being successful.

• Why do I weigh what I weigh?
• Why do I have as much fabric as I have?
• Why do I watch as much TV as I do?
• What is it about me that's so fixed on over-consuming?

• Dr. Carol Dweck from Stanford University - Growth Mindset research
• The concept "Personality Isn't Permanent"
• Henry Ford's famous mindset quote

Ready to explore how identity shifts can transform your life? Dara challenges you to book a call and discuss where you want to go and how to get there.

Book a call with Dara HERE

• Website: daratomasson.com 
• Instagram: @dara_tomasson
• Watch this episode on YouTube (and follow Dara there!)

If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe to The Quilter's Coach Podcast and leave a review! Your reviews help other quilters and creative women find the show.

Ever feel like you're halfway through summer and already thinking, "I blew it... I need a do-over"? Whether it's a new quilt project, a wellness goal, or just trying to keep life on track — the pattern of starting strong, falling off, and wanting to restart can feel never-ending.

In this episode, Dara unpacks:

• Why the urge to "start over" is often a form of self-sabotage

• How perfectionism and fear of failure sneak into your creative process

• What happens when you ditch judgment and embrace curiosity

• How one member used these tools to stand up for herself and rewrite her story

Dara also shares her 90-day process and how simple, consistent actions can change the way you approach food, goals, and even relationships.

🎯 If you're tired of all-or-nothing thinking and want lasting results, this episode is for you.

Book a call with Dara to find out if her program is right for you!

Follow Dara on social media @dara_tomasson

In this episode, Dara redefines what cravings actually mean — and shows you how they're not a signal to eat, but a signal to connect. With yourself. With your emotions. With what you actually need.

Through heartfelt coaching stories (including a member navigating the death of her spouse with grounded self-leadership), Dara helps you unpack the difference between desire and distraction. You'll learn how to stop reinforcing unhelpful patterns and how to develop a new internal dialogue that creates peace, not panic, around cravings.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• What your cravings are really trying to tell you

• Why trying to "resist" or ignore cravings backfires

• How to rewire your brain to want connection over food

• A simple coaching question that transforms late-night eating

• Why discomfort isn't the enemy — disconnection is

You don't need more willpower. You need more understanding. This episode will give you both.

Don't wait, book a call with Dara to find out more about how she can help you! Book your free call HERE

Watching this episode on YouTube

Follow Dara on social media @dara_tomasson

Bonus! Feeling those cravings coming on and want some healthy alternatives to chips, pretzles and ice cream? Grab Dara's free guide for Healthy Food Swaps!

In this episode, Dara shares her personal journey through emotional eating, perfectionism, and body image, uncovering the real reason diets don't work: they bypass the emotional and identity-based roots of our patterns.

Drawing inspiration from "Personality Isn't Permanent" by Dr. Benjamin Hardy and timeless movie quests like "The Hobbit" and "Harry Potter," Dara reveals how true change comes from becoming the person who can handle discomfort—not avoiding it with food, clutter, or control. She breaks down the four levers of identity change, explains why chasing "authenticity" can be misleading, and makes a powerful case for life coaching as a tool to claim your future self.

Key Takeaways:

• Why self-help and organizing tools can keep you stuck in the same cycle

• The 4 identity levers that truly shape personality and permanent change

• The myth of the "authentic self" — and why it can actually stunt your growth

• Why emotional resilience—not discipline—is the path to a peaceful relationship with food

• A quilter's real-life win that proves mindset tools beat meal plans every time

Ready to lose weight without starting a new diet? Book a call with Dara to find out how!

Watch this episode on YouTube

Tired of the pressure to "fix" your body before you can enjoy summer? You're not alone. In this powerful episode, Dara tackles the harmful myth of the "summer bod" and why shame is keeping so many women stuck — mentally, emotionally, and physically. She shares how to shift from body hate to body connection, how to use neuroscience-backed visualization tools like Mind Movies, and how members of her program are losing weight and gaining confidence without relying on guilt.

You'll learn:

• The difference between guilt and shame (and why one's helpful, the other isn't)

• How shame keeps you stuck in sabotage

• Why pursuing weight loss from a place of fear backfires

• What to do instead — using curiosity, connection, and care

Also in this episode:

💬 A personal story about my son's comment on an old photo… and how I handled it
🧠 A brain hack called "Mind Movies" to help you visualize the life (and body) you want — without shame
❤️ Why one member in her 70s is finally loving herself while losing weight — without dieting

If this episode speaks to you, don't keep struggling on your own. Book a free 20-minute call with me and let's get to the bottom of your biggest block.

📞 www.daratomasson.com/contact

You're not broken. You're not behind. You're just not using the right tools yet.

Let's change that.

Do you find yourself dreading summer because you're unsure what to do with it—or yourself?
When was the last time you made a goal and actually followed through?

In this episode, Dara dives into the power of summer bucket lists—not just as a fun checklist, but as a tool for intention, growth, and creativity. Whether you're navigating emotional eating, dreaming of more meaningful experiences, or just want to feel something again, this episode will help you reconnect with yourself and your goals.

You'll discover:

• Why most women stop setting goals (and how to shift that)

• How wonder and curiosity lead to real, lasting transformation

• The creative energy that comes from delight—not discipline

• The connection between purposeful goals and sustainable weight loss

• A moving story of a member breaking through the 200-lb mark (without counting calories or tracking steps)

Plus: Dara also shares a behind-the-scenes look at her coaching calls, where she can spot your #1 self-sabotaging pattern in just 7 minutes — and how to book a free call with her this week.

📞 Book your free call: www.daratomasson.com/contact

This episode is a celebration of intentional living, gentle curiosity, and what becomes possible when you give yourself permission to want more and do something about it.

🪣 Want to join the Summer Bucket List Challenge?
We're doing it now inside the membership—and it's not too late to join. Let's make this summer meaningful, together. Book your call and rediscover joy and wonder this summer!

Follow Dara on Instagram for more inspiration @dara_tomasson

Learn more about Dara and her program on her website www.daratomasson.com

Watch this podcast episode on YouTube

Do you resist the label of perfectionist — or wear it like a badge of honor?

Either way, this episode is going to change the way you think about perfectionism forever.

Because perfectionism isn't just about straight-A report cards or color-coded closets. It shows up in your weight, your relationships, your to-do list — and most importantly, your thinking.

In this episode, Dara explores the four most common types of perfectionism and how they shape your emotional habits, your body, and your experience of life:

• 🧍‍♀️ The Pleaser

• 🕰️ The Procrastinator

• 🏃‍♀️ The Over-doer

• ❓ The Self-Doubter

You'll learn:

• How perfectionism is a survival response (not a flaw)

• Why we subconsciously cling to these patterns

• What you can do to retrain your brain with more emotional safety

• How one member shifted from emotional chaos to healing family relationships — just by losing the desire to soothe with food

👉 Plus, don't miss the 9-question quiz to find out your perfectionist type.
Take the quiz and discover the customized support you need to rewire your brain and finally feel free.

What Kind of Perfectionist Are You?

Watch this episode on YouTube 

Do you have boxes of stuff in your home that don't even belong to you… but you still feel responsible for?
Do you feel overwhelmed just thinking about where to start — so you don't start at all?

If the answer is yes, this episode is for you.

Whether it's fabric you've been "saving for later," photos from your dad's amateur photography hobby, your great Aunt Sue's china, or bins of your adult kids' belongings, the emotional weight of stuff is real. And it's often tied to self-worth, people-pleasing, perfectionism, and grief.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why letting go of physical clutter is also about letting go of emotional weight

• How cultural and family identity can keep us stuck in our stuff

• The most powerful question to ask when you feel stuck: "What would be delightful?"

• Why generic decluttering systems don't work for everyone — and how to create your own

Plus, hear a touching member win about a woman in her 70s who finally stopped the pattern of emotional eating (starting with just one lonely cookie 🍪) — and how her mindset shift changed everything.

This is not just about getting organized.
It's about creating peace in your space — and in your mind.

🧠 Mentioned in this episode:

• Quiz: What Kind of Perfectionist Are You? 

🎧 Listen now and take the first step toward a more open, peaceful, and delightful life.

Do you ever feel like you're back in 6th grade when it comes to friendships?
Are you surprised (and maybe a little embarrassed) by how much drama, insecurity, or awkwardness still shows up when it comes to friendships as an adult?

If you've ever cringed at how much this still affects you... you're not alone, and you're in the right place.

In this episode, I'm diving deep into adult friendships — the good, the hard, the healing — and how our experiences with friends tie directly into our emotional well-being (yes, even our weight-loss journeys).

You'll discover:

• Why old friendship wounds might still be affecting you today

• How unresolved trauma can keep you emotionally stuck (and how to begin moving forward)

• What it really means to be your own best friend — and how that shifts every other relationship in your life

• Why friendship dynamics can be tricky (especially when people-pleasing or obligation creeps in)

• The surprising connection between emotional safety and permanent weight loss

This episode is full of reflection questions, real-life stories from clients, and actionable takeaways to help you stop feeling like an insecure kid and start showing up as your most confident, connected self.

🎉 Member Win Highlight:
One of our incredible members recently hosted an awareness event for sex trafficking in her community — and over 300 people showed up. She thought no one would come... but she stepped into her power anyway. Just another reminder that age is never a disqualifier, and your courage matters more than your fear.

🧠 Why This Matters for Weight Loss
You might be asking: What do friendships have to do with losing weight? A lot more than you think. Weight loss isn't just about what you eat — it's about how you feel, how you cope, and how you treat yourself. Learning to process emotions, heal old wounds, and feel safe in relationships (including the one with yourself) is key.

💭 Reflective Questions to Consider:

• What is your friendship history?

• Do you change yourself to "fit in" or avoid disconnection?

• Do certain interactions trigger emotional responses that feel disproportionate?

• Are there unresolved friendship traumas from your past?

• Are your current friendships energizing or draining?

💌 Listener Challenge:
What would it look like to start being a better friend to yourself?
Instead of distracting with food, your phone, or errands… what if you slowed down and simply connected with you?

👯‍♀️ Ready for Deeper Connection?
Inside the Love Yourself Thin Membership, we're spending July exploring what it really means to be with ourselvesinstead of just distracting or avoiding. Our Summer Bucket List Challenge is all about creating joy and connection — whether that's making solo hikes, taking museum trips, or making charity quilts from a place of love and presence.

Want in? Let's make this summer about being with yourself in ways that feel meaningful, not lonely.

🔗 Connect with Dara:

Instagram @dara_tomasson

Website 

Watch this episode on YouTube

If this episode resonated, share it with a friend — or better yet, share it with yourself. You deserve friendships (and a life) that feel light, safe, and full of joy.