Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast
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| 36: Your Poly Newbie Survival Kit Essentials | 02 Dec 2024 | 00:23:19 | |
What essentials need to be in your Poly Newbie Survival Kit? Are you new to non-monogamy or opening up a relationship? In this episode, we’ll equip you with a list of the tools, insights, and strategies you need to thrive—and avoid some of the most common challenges along the way. These essential steps are drawn straight from our 7-module Poly Newbies Digital Course, designed to set you up for success: 1️⃣ The Basics of Non-Monogamy: Key definitions, identifying your “why,” and navigating your hopes and fears. 2️⃣ Choosing Your Style: Exploring what kind of non-monogamy aligns with your needs and desires. 3️⃣ Mastering Communication: Building connection, eliminating toxic patterns, and speaking your truth effectively. 4️⃣ Rightsizing Jealousy: Understanding this complex emotion and cultivating greater security. 5️⃣ Attachment Styles: Discovering yours and moving toward secure attachment. 6️⃣ Boundaries & Agreements: Creating personal boundaries and our signature Values-Based Relationship Agreements™. 7️⃣ Keeping It Awesome: Relationship check-ins, dating tips, and maintaining the spark! ✨ Plus, we dive into juicy extras, including:
All this and personal stories from our own non-monogamy journey! 🎉 Hit play and start your journey toward thriving in non-monogamy! 🎧💖 Show Resources & Special Offers:
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| 35: Building, Rebuilding, and Maintaining Trusts in Relationships - Part 2 | 26 Nov 2024 | 00:55:20 | |
When there's been dishonesty, a betrayal or cheating in a relationship, it can result in a loss of trust that's hard to recover from. This episode is part 2 of a two part-series on Building, Rebuilding, and Maintaining Trusts in Relationships. In Part 1, we explored:
In Part 2, we pick up where we left off with a recap on what trust is and how trust can be lost specifically in non-monogamous relationships. We then share specific strategies on how you can rebuild trust as a result of any of these things or other setbacks such as:
We also share how you might recognize if is an isolated situation or if this person is not trustworthy and it isn’t in your best interest to trust them again. This episode is perfect for anyone navigating trust challenges and looking for practical, compassionate advice to create more secure, resilient relationships. And, in celebration of Polyamory Day on November 23 our gift to you is that you can get our Poly Newbies Digital Course for just $27—a 90% savings off the regular $297 price until Cyber Monday. Learn more at https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesblackfriday Show Resources:
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| 26: Pardon Me But You’re Stepping on My BOUNDARIES | 29 Jul 2024 | 00:42:46 | |
Personal boundaries… they’re the imaginary lines we can draw around ourselves to maintain balance and protect our bodies, minds, emotions, and time for ourselves and from the behaviour or demands of others. Our boundaries are most effective when we are first clear about them ourselves and then when we communicate them to others. If you find it hard to share your boundaries, you are not alone. Even when someone crosses our boundaries (intentionally or unintentionally), common worries are that we are asking for too much, being too difficult or if we say something, they might not like us. In this episode you’ll learn: ✅ What personal boundaries are vs. agreements or rules we might have with our partner(s); ✅ Why boundaries are important (hint: it’s about you) ✅ How to set your boundaries; ✅ How to communicate them; and ✅ Why people want to know your boundaries Download our Building and Communicating My Personal Boundaries FREE WORKSHEET which will guide you in setting your boundaries and having them stick! If you'd like it to feel EASIER to communicate your boundaries and feel SECURE in your open or polyamorous relationship, we can help! Book a complimentary call where we can speak confidentially about your personal circumstances and how we can work together OR jump right into our Poly Newbies Digital Course or Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery coaching program which have proven systems that will provide you with a foundation for success! Show References:
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| Relationship Rules By the Numbers: 1-1-1 to 69! | 23 Jul 2024 | 00:53:54 | |
You’ve probably seen the various “rules” out there that attempt to cleverly use numbers to describe what you should or shouldn’t do in a relationship or when dating. Having rules and guidelines to follow to lead you to a desired outcome can be helpful and even comforting. Like the 2-2-2 one that suggests that couples should go on a date once every two weeks, spend a weekend away every two months and take a week-long vacation every two years. Others are just plain awful. There's the 6-6-6-6 rule that women with "high standards" should only look for men who are 6 feet tall, with a 6 inch 🍆, six figure salary and a six-pack! In this episode we take an informative and humorous look at these relationship rules, debunk the myths and as always provide expert solid advice on what things you might want to consider to have secure, successful and sexy polyamorous relationships! There's even some food talk in there to keep you entertained with references to yams, sausages and oysters! We would love to hear your take on these numerical rules, what your favorites were and any that we missed (good advice or otherwise). If you’re listening on Spotify you can now add comments to each episode! We want to continue to keep this podcast free and reach as many people as possible so it would help us a lot of you hit the like button, subscribe, share with your friends and write a review! Show references:
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| Accidental Polyamory: Now What? | 16 Jul 2024 | 00:32:21 | |
Have you heard the term ACCIDENTAL POLYAMORY? This is what some call those unexpected journeys that lead individuals and couples into exploring polyamory dynamics either as a willing participant or with some fear or resistance. In this episode, Accidental Polyamory: Now What? we cover 3 different unexpected scenarios one can find themselves in. Imagine you're in a monogamous relationship, and suddenly, one partner expresses a desire to explore consensual non-monogamy or open the relationship. How do you navigate those conversations and potential changes? Or, picture this: you're single and enjoying the dating scene when you meet someone amazing, only to find out they are polyamorous. How do you handle being with someone with multiple partners, and determine if this is a relationship style that suits you? Maybe you’re already non-monogamous - like a swinger or in an open relationship - and then you or your partner start developing deeper emotional connections and want to shift to a more polyamorous model. How do you handle this significant change? We share other definitions and terms you might come across in these situations like cowboy/cowgirl and poly-bombing. Join us as we share real stories, expert insights, and practical advice for anyone finding themselves unexpectedly on the path to polyamory. Whether you’re curious about polyamory, already practicing some form of non-monogamy or simply interested in the diverse ways people love and connect, this episode is for you! Resources referenced in this episode:
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| Danger Ahead: Polyamory Risks and Threats | 08 Jul 2024 | 00:45:05 | |
Thinking about opening your relationship or diving into polyamory? It sounds thrilling and 🔥hot, right? Imagine the excitement of meeting new people and having the freedom to explore both emotional and sexual connections with them. For us, it's been an incredible and fulfilling journey, surpassing our wildest dreams. But, there are some unexpected risks and challenges that can threaten the security of any relationship. In this episode, we share our personal experiences and cover the things you'll want to be ready for including: ✨ Feeling different than you might imagine. ✨ How your attachment style and your partner(s)'s can influence your experiences. ✨ The gap between your expectations and reality. ✨ You don't know what you don't know. ✨ You might not be as great a communicator as think you are and you'll need to communicate more than you'd expect. ✨ You are not as prepared as you believe! We share specific examples for each point and provide insights on how to better prepare yourself for the unexpected as you navigate your personal journey! Resources referenced in this episode: - Poly Newbies Digital Course - https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse - S1E8 podcast episode: How is My Attachment Style Impacting My Relationships - https://open.spotify.com/episode/3KUuTKZQKRNHBISBeynIvq?si=R2jyYOCDT1ueCM4BgIzatQ - Attachment Quiz - https://quiz.attachmentproject.com/ - S1E5 podcast episode: Sex Parties 101: A Guide to Being the Best Host and Great Guest - https://open.spotify.com/episode/3cOwAFpV7tpRgR56tzRtvf?si=ZRUMtrsaSp-VBd83LUyM2g * all podcast episodes also available on Apple and YouTube podcasts, Amazon Music and iHeart Radio | |||
| 6 Steps to Feeling Less Jealous & More Secure in Polyamorous Relationships | 01 Jul 2024 | 00:49:08 | |
At some point in your journey towards non-monogamy someone you know has likely said to you "I could never do that. I'm too jealous!" Maybe you've even wondered this about yourself or have been afraid that you aren't cut out for non-monogamy given some of the strong feelings you've felt. While jealousy is one of the main things that people are challenged with when opening a relationship or experiencing polyamory for the first time, and it can be intense and feel all consuming, there are ways of understanding your jealousy and finding of ways to work through these feelings so that you can shift to being neutral or even experiencing compersion! 💖 Pinky swear! And... a little myth busting... the reality is that most non-monogamous people experience jealousy or insecurity under certain circumstances from time to time. The key is to learn how to be less impacted by it. In this episode of the Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast we dive into this topic and share with you the 6 things you can do starting now to feel more secure in your relationships! Resources referenced in this episode:
Find out more about us and the services we offer as well as access some other great resources on our website at: https://www.taraandandre.com/ | |||
| New Relationship Energy: The Awesome and The Awful | 25 Jun 2024 | 00:51:49 | |
New Relationship Energy, or NRE, sometimes gets a bad rap in polyamory as while one person may be experiencing the highs of being with someone new, others that they are in relationships may feel left behind, or jealous or find it threatening to the security of that connection... hence the "awful" But it’s not all about putting out forest fires. There’s nothing wrong with new relationship energy in itself, and in fact it can be an "awesome" experience for all involved. One of the amazing things about polyamory is that it allows people to experience all the magic of new love without destroying long-term, stable relationships in the process - and may even breathe new energy and pleasure into them! There are always considerations or things to navigate whether you’re the person experiencing the NRE with someone new, the new person or the people they are in relationships with. We talk about all of these things and more in this podcast episode! We want to encourage and support spreading the word of polyamory and normalize it as a valid relational identity - one which can be secure and long-lasting! To help you and others to learn more, we’ve decided to reduce our profit on our 7-Module Poly Newbies Digital Course so that more people can access this valuable resource. You can find this special offer at https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer You can book a Pay What You Can Coaching Session with Tara at https://go.taraandandre.com/pwyccoachingsession Want to know more about us, find out about our other coaching and therapy services or book us for your event or podcast? 👉 https://taraandandre.com/ | |||
| Polyamory Terms and Definitions: Metamours & More | 17 Jun 2024 | 00:42:03 | |
In this episode of the Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast we are open up our polyamory dictionary and cover a ton of common definitions and terms you may come across as you navigate consensual non-monogamy:
We cover common myths you might hear (like that you MUST get to know and like your metamours) and how terms and labels such as these are useful to help identify yourself and why you still need to ask someone what their definitions are so you are on the same page in understanding. And of course it wouldn't be our podcast if we didn't share some of our personal stories including how our relationship fits into multiple "styles" and how being with others who are different than each other doesn’t take away from our relationship, but instead is one of the things that enhances our relationship and why polyamory is such a great fit for us! Resources referenced in this episode:
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| How to Start in Polyamory (And Not Totally Suck at It) | 10 Jun 2024 | 00:35:53 | |
Are there things that you feel you 😩 “suck” at in your open or polyamorous relationships? Perhaps it seems that others are having an easy time and doing it “right” and that you’re the only ones with an all-you-can-ride ticket on struggle bus! Here’s the TRUTH though... Nobody does it perfectly. Everyone sucks at non-monogamy at some point. This can happen at the beginning or at any stop along the way in your journey. We know from our own experiences and from the couples and individuals we've worked with. Just when you think you’ve figured it out, something can come along that surprises and challenges you. That doesn’t mean it isn’t right for you. Maybe you, like André admits on this podcast, sucked at monogamy which is why polyamory is a better fit and is worth figuring out. In this episode we talk about the 5 things you can do when opening an existing relationship or exploring polyamory so you suck less!
If you want to start in opening a relationship and would like support so you don't suck, for a limited time you can benefit from a focussed intensive coaching experience with us that will allow you to MINIMIZE your growing pains & MAXIMIZE your pleasure, connection and security. Find out more at 🏁https://go.taraandandre.com/openrelationshipstartup NOW AVAILABLE: Our Poly & Proud & PRIDE gear! https://my-store-f79154.creator-spring.com/ Want to know more about us, the services and programs we offer or book us for your event or podcast? Visit us at: | |||
| Part 2: How to Securely Transition in Consensual Non-Monogamy | 27 May 2024 | 00:43:44 | |
In this episode we pick up where we left off in part 1 and take a deeper dive into WHY making a transition to a different relating style of consensual / ethical non-monogamy can be such an issue for couples. These new and unexpected feelings and struggles often come as a surprise as prior to making the change they might have felt secure in what they were doing. If you missed part 1, we shared the 5 essential steps to feel good in making a change in your relationship: ✅ Understanding what makes you want to make the change ✅ Finding clarity around what you want and developing your personal relationship vision ✅ Communication (no surprise this is on the list right?) ✅ Making a plan to implement that vision including agreements you might want to make ✅ Regular reviews and making adjustments as necessary. The program we refer to in this podcast is our 16 week Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery program which includes 8 modules of training plus direct coaching with us! You can find out more about this program at https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery You can learn more about us, access free resources and find out about our Poly Newbies Digital Course and other coaching and therapy services on our website at https://www.taraandandre.com/. Get Support: If navigating this transition is causing some unfamiliar big feels that you're having trouble with, or if you need support on another issue, we invite you to book a complimentary Relationship Rescue Call. On this call we will help you unpack what might be the cause of these feelings and give you an action plan of next steps you can take on your own and/or with our support to get you back to that place of fun and pleasure you've always enjoyed in your relationship. You can book that call at https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue | |||
| How to Securely Transition into Different Ways of Doing Non-Monogamy | 20 May 2024 | 00:36:27 | |
Change is exhilarating and exciting, but as you may have experienced, it can also be challenging, especially in relationships! Many of our listeners have shared with us that they are in the midst of making a transition in their relationships, opening up to the idea of polyamory and dating people individually. These transitions often involve difficult discussions and feelings of insecurity and instability that weren't there before. Firstly, this is NORMAL! As new people enter the picture in closer and more emotionally intimate ways, it can trigger some unexpected emotions. And secondly, as always, we’ve got you! In this episode,⚡️How to Securely Transition Into Different Ways of Doing Non-Monogamy you'll learn five key strategies to create a solid foundation for this transition, helping you feel less scared and much more secure to move forward. If you’d like to make a secure transition in your relationship and address issues that have come up as a result of opening your relationship, book a confidential Relationship Rescue Call with Tara and get your next steps at https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue. Find out more about us, the services we offer, book us for a talk, and access other great resources at https://www.taraandandre.com/ The club we spoke at and refer to in this episode is Oasis Aqualounge in Toronto, Ontario, Canada: https://oasisaqualounge.com/ We invite you to subscribe and share a review on any of our podcasting platforms! | |||
| 34: Casual Car Conversations: STIs, Testing & Acceptable Risk | 19 Nov 2024 | 00:57:17 | |
You may not find it surprising but we talk about non-monogamy, relationships, sex and related topics A LOT, especially when we are driving or travelling. We were having one such conversation recently and decided to record it as we felt our listeners would find it helpful to hear as we work through and discuss a situation that arose for us personally around possible STI exposure and how we might handle sharing how we feel about upcoming plans with friends. In this episode we cover:
We encourage you to do your own research, inform yourself, talk to your doctor, talk to your partners and figure out what’s right for you! And as we asked during the podcast are these things you’ve considered and/or has this podcast changed what you think about wanting to be non-monogamous or in the lifestyle? Let us know in the comments! Show Resources:
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| 16: Is It Time to De-Escalate My Relationship? | 13 May 2024 | 00:49:23 | |
Have you ever found yourself choosing between staying together or splitting up for good? If you're considering changes in your relationship, tune in as we delve into the intriguing question: Is It Time To De-Escalate My Relationship? Because there's other options out there, and we're diving deep into them in this special podcast episode. We kick things off with a heartfelt, unscripted conversation about our own journey in reshaping our polyamorous relationship. Trust us, it's been quite the adventure! 🎢 Next up, get ready for a captivating discussion on de-escalating a relationship that we covered before we made this decison where we cover:
And finally we go over the steps you can take to de-escalate or modify your relationship in a consensual and loving way including how to approach your partners proactively. If your are considering if it’s time to call it quits, de-escalate your relationship or if you want to dig in and make changes to improve your relationship we’d love to help. Book a confidential call to talk about it with Tara at https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue. Find out more about us and the services we offer as well as access some other great resources at: https://www.taraandandre.com/ | |||
| Can An Open Relationship Save My Marriage? | 06 May 2024 | 00:54:16 | |
It's a question we often get asked... Can opening my relationship (or monogamous LTR) save my marriage? Conventional wisdom, and perhaps even our own advice in the past, would warn against opening up a relationship as a fix or solution. BUT... the more accurate answer is YES, it could help in some cases. In this episode we explore the possibility of opening your relationship and the many benefits you can gain such as deeper connection, trust, variety, sexual and emotional stimulation and personal growth to name a few. All while enjoying the rewards, security and benefits of being married or in a LTR that you desire. We also share the very unique circumstances and conditions that need to either be in place before you open or that you need to build your “qualifications” in such as fantastic communication, understanding your jealousy, secure attachment and more. If you’d like to open a relationship and are unsure if it will work for you, or if you’ve already opened and feel that perhaps you weren’t quite ready for it, we can help via individual and couples coaching or one of our programs! Book a confidential call to talk with Tara at https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue to find out what would be best for you! You can also find out more about us and the services we offer as well as access some other great resources on our website at https://www.taraandandre.com/. | |||
| Unicorns & Unicorn Hunting: Can It Be Ethical? | 29 Apr 2024 | 00:56:44 | |
🦄Unicorns… mythical creatures or real? In this episode we talk about UNICORNS in the context of consensual non-monogamy and if if UNICORN HUNTING can be done in a way that defies this stereotype so that it’s ethical, consensual and feels good for all parties involved! The term unicorn-hunting typically describes the practice of an established couple searching for a third person to engage in either threesomes or triads. You may have seen such couples stating they are “looking for a third”. Often this is a heterosexual couple looking to add a bisexual woman to their relationship who is equally attracted to both of them and interested in whatever arrangement that couple has in mind. Where this can end up being a less than favourable arrangement, in particular for the unicorn, and why searching for a third gets a bad rap is because of the unequal power dynamic that can exist in some cases. Having said this, there are those that LOVE being a unicorn when the conditions are right. We talk about this and the results of a survey we did of our Let’s Talk Polyamory community members on this controversial topic. We have left this survey open for those who wish to share their views as well - https://forms.gle/4jL3JhYVANRmFo1c9 which we can use for a follow-up episode. Join our Let's Talk Polyamory Private Facebook Group and can share your ideas on the topic of unicorn hunting or start a discussion on a topic of your choice! https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly Find out more about us and the services we offer as well as access some other great resources at: https://www.taraandandre.com/ If you want to talk to us about what's going on in your relationships and what options there are to get support in addressing issues you're struggling with, book a complimentary call with Tara. She'll make sure you leave with the next step you can take to take towards what you want. https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue | |||
| 5 Ways to Reignite the 🔥FIRE in Long-Term Relationships: Part 4 | 22 Apr 2024 | 00:25:21 | |
Are you putting in effort to keep your sex life 🌶spicyyy or just waiting and wishing for things to change on their own? This is the final instalment of our podcast series the 5 Ways to Reignite the 🔥Fire in Long-Term Relationships where we cover the 5th way: Doing something different that takes deliberate effort. Because epic relationships, awesome adventures and 🔥hot sex lives don't just appear out of thin air! If you missed the first 3 parts of the series we covered: ✅ Having some distance and spend time apart ✅ Being Present - physically, emotionally and sexually ✅ Interrupting patterns and routines ✅Increasing sexual and erotic energy We recap these in this episode and give more examples too! Here's the link to our Let's Talk Polyamory Private Facebook Group where you can share your ideas on what keeps the fire alive in your relationships or start a discussion on a topic of your choice! https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly Find out more about us and the services we offer as well as access some other great resources at: https://www.taraandandre.com/ If you want to talk to us about what's going on in your relationships and what options there are to get support in addressing issues you're struggling with, book a complimentary call with Tara. She'll make sure you leave with the next step you can take to take towards what you want. https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue | |||
| 5 Ways to Reignite the 🔥Fire in Long-Term Relationships: Part 3 | 15 Apr 2024 | 00:38:30 | |
What gets you hot and bothered in the bedroom? In this episode we are continuing our discussion of the 5 Ways to Reignite the 🔥Fire in Long Term Relationships with #4... Increasing sexual and erotic energy! So how exactly do you do that? Maybe it’s being touched somewhere unusual where you’re not normally touched, or that you don’t normally think of as an erogenous zone? Like the side of your ankle which André shares a story about. Or maybe it is something that allows you to prepare and get warmed up for intimacy which Tara shares. We talk about all these things as well as concepts, like responsive desire and how to utilize that and other things to get things hot again! If you missed parts 1 and 2 we talked about: ✅ Having some distance and spending time apart ✅ Being present which includes being physically, emotionally and sexually present with our partners ✅ Interrupting Patterns and Routines If you want to talk to us about what's going on in your relationships and what options there are to get support, book a relationship rescue call with Tara here: https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue Find out more about us and the services we offer as well as access some other great resources at: https://www.taraandandre.com/ The lifestyle/sex/libertine club we referenced in the podcast is Club L in Montréal, Quebec, Canada. You can find out more about them at https://www.leclubl.com/ The life-changing Cervix Wand that Tara refers in this episode can be found on https://waands.com/products/cervix-wand?ref=taraandandre and you can enter the code TARALYNNEFRANCO to get a 10% discount. | |||
| 5 Ways to Reignite the 🔥Fire in Long-Term Relationships: Part 2 | 08 Apr 2024 | 00:46:11 | |
When we are in longer-term relationships we can have so many amazing things - security, safety, familiarity and predictability and a safe haven. However, these things we love can be the very things that can dampen the mystery, intrigue, excitement and longing that are strong foundations for desire and eroticism. Hence why it is so important to find ways of keeping the excitement alive in our relationship. In Part 1 of The 5 Ways to Reignite the Fire in Long-Term Relationships we spoke of the first two things: ✅ Having some distance and spending time apart ✅ Being present which includes being physically, emotionally and sexually present with our partners In this episode we continue with the 3rd thing you can do: ✅ Interrupting Patterns and Routines If you want to talk to us about what's going on in your relationships and what options there are to get support, book a relationship rescue call here - https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue | |||
| 5 Ways to Reignite the 🔥Fire in Long-Term Relationships: Part 1 | 31 Mar 2024 | 00:56:52 | |
We often expect our partner to be both our best friend and erotic partner. But these two needs often push against each other. On the one hand, we need security, safety, familiarity and predictability and a safe haven and secure base. But we also need adventure, unpredictability, mystery and surprise which is what ⛽️fuels sexual energy! Join us, your hosts and coaching and therapist duo T&A -Tara and André as we discuss desire in relationships in Part one of: The 5 Ways to REIGNITE 🔥FIRE in Long-Term Relationships! In this episode we cover the first two ways: ✅ Have some distance and spend time apart ✅ Being Present We also touch on our attachment patterns and how they impact relationships as well as resentments and how they can build and hurt our connection with our partners! If you need support in addressing decreased desire or navigating your open or polyamorous relationships we can help! Book a complimentary Relationship Rescue Consultation Call with Tara and find out how you can navigate your open relationship with ease & pleasure using our proven Securely Polyamorous Framework™. https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue or check out our website at https://www.taraandandre.com/ for information on our programs and services. | |||
| The Do's and Don'ts of Polyamory | 25 Mar 2024 | 00:54:42 | |
Whenever you try something new, you’re bound to make some mistakes or literally “step in it” as you try to figure out what to do and not to do. This is especially the case when there are people, relationships and feelings involved - like when you’re navigating the complexities of polyamorous relationships which requires a unique set of skills, insights and things to consider. In this podcast episode, we discuss the essential essential ✅ Do's and 🛑 Don'ts of Polyamory - from parking your ego at the door and taking responsibility for your actions and feelings, to not comparing yourself to others or using polyamory as an excuse to do whatever you want. This episode was inspired by someone André is working with and supporting their transition to consensual non-monogamy (and other things) who mentioned that they are reading The Polyamory Workbook: An Interactive Guide to Setting Boundaries, Communicating Your Needs, and Building Secure, Healthy Open Relationships by Sarah Youngblood Gregory. In the book Sarah has a graphic of some high level do’s and don’ts which we break down and provide our thoughts! We also add some of our own! Check out our website at https://www.taraandandre.com/ to find out how to join our online community and learn more about about our coaching and therapy services, our digital course Poly Newbies as well as how you can book a complimentary consultation call. | |||
| How Is My Attachment Style Impacting My Non-Monogamous Relationships? | 18 Mar 2024 | 00:35:32 | |
Our individual attachment style influences how we react when we experience separation, threat, or pressure in a relationship. This can look like being perfectly fine to being clingy, impulsive, to overwhelmed or pushing others away. Opening a relationship or becoming polyamorous can activate our primary (or default/dominant) attachment style and patterns, especially if they are one of the 3 insecure styles. In this episode we explore attachment theory in the context of consensual non-monogamous relationships and discuss:
And speaking of that… this week we have a special free WORKSHEET to help you do just that! You can sign up to get it at https://go.taraandandre.com/gettheworksheet You can discover your attachment style through one of these quizzes:
Get Support: Book a complimentary Relationship Rescue Consultation Call with Tara and find out how you can navigate your open relationship with ease & pleasure using our proven Securely Polyamorous Framework™. https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue or check out our website at https://www.taraandandre.com/ for information on our programs and services. | |||
| 7: How We Love: What Style of Non-Monogamy is for Me? | 11 Mar 2024 | 00:45:29 | |
It’s one thing to find yourself in a place where you feel that monogamy may not be a fit for you, but a whole other thing to figure out what exactly is. In this episode of the Let’s Talk Polyamory podcast we walk through the different styles of consensually non-monogamy from monogamish, swinging and open relationships, to polyamory, relationship anarchy and everything in between. We uncover the nuances and possibilities within each style helping you navigate your personal journey of finding the right fit for your relationship preferences. We share our thoughts and reflections of how our style has changed over time and how we aren’t just one, but many different styles and that’s totally cool! Plus, we offer up some questions you can ask yourself to figure out what’s right for you including what level of emotional or sexual exclusivity you’re looking for. All these questions are in a free worksheet you can sign up for at: https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/cnmstyle If you have a burning question, want to talk to us about our programs or how you can work with us so that you can master your open or polyamorous relationship, you can book a 15 minute coffee chat with Tara at https://go.taraandandre.com/15mincoffeechat. Check out our website at https://www.taraandandre.com/.for information about about our coaching programs and services and how to get other great stuff! | |||
| What to Say? How to Talk to Kids About Non-Monogamy, Sex, Kink and Other Stuff | 12 Nov 2024 | 01:16:35 | |
Talking to kids about topics like non-monogamy, sex, intimacy, kink and relationships can sometimes feel daunting parents. It's easy to worry about saying the wrong thing, making things awkward, or just plain messing it up. In this episode, we sit down with sexuality educator Ms. Ashley Robertson for a deep dive into guiding these conversations with kids of all ages—from toddlers to teens and beyond! Together, we share practical tips, advice, and recommended approaches for discussing these topics at every stage. We cover what the focus should be, how to approach these subjects, which words to use, and even how long these conversations should go. We also discuss what not to say, how to avoid oversharing, and ways to build a “scaffold” of knowledge that helps your kids climb layer by layer without falling off. We touch on essentials like when and how to introduce non-monogamy and partners to kids, what to say if a partner is no longer in your life, and how to manage those moments when kids bring up people from your past that you’d rather forget. And we explore concepts like “chosen family,” the “onion” and “buffet” analogies, being an “askable adult,” consent and how kids are “bystanders”, the “skipping stones” strategy for teens and more! Plus, we answer questions from our Let’s Talk Polyamory community. And… spoiler alert ...a lot of these tips are great for adult conversations, too! Tune in for practical advice, a few laughs, and all the insights you need to make these talks a little less intimidating and a lot more meaningful! You’re going to love it! Resources:
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| How to Succeed as a Poly Newbie | 04 Mar 2024 | 00:33:14 | |
Are you exploring consensual non-monogamy (CNM) and finding yourself overwhelmed by the tide of tough emotions? Perhaps you constantly feel like you're putting out the latest emotional fire, and being polyamorous or in an open relationship isn't unfolding quite as you had imagined. There’s heartaches, self-doubt, arguments, jealousy, frustration and more. If any of these resonate with you, this episode on ⭐️HOW TO SUCCEED AS A POLY NEWBIE⭐️ is just for you! In this episode, we delve into the seven essential elements that serve as the foundation for success as a poly newbie. We share advice on:
But here's the exciting part – all the essential elements discussed in this episode have been carefully integrated into our Poly Newbies Digital Course. This comprehensive course is now fully built out and available, providing you with a step-by-step guide to confidently open your relationship in a way that feels comfortable and secure! If you're tired of feeling poly-terrified and want to enjoy more pleasure, less pain in your polyamorous journey and build a secure foundation for all your relationships our Poly Newbies Digital Course has everything you need. Find out more and secure your spot now: https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse Note that this talk was originally recorded in September 2023, and all course modules including trainings and exercises are available! You have full access to all the training for a full 6-months when you sign up! You can also find out more about us, the services we offer, plus some cool stuff like PRIDE wear, free resources and how you can book a free consultation call at our website at www.taraandandre.com. | |||
| Sex Parties 101: A Guide to Being the Best Host and a Great Guest | 26 Feb 2024 | 00:55:11 | |
Have you every been to a sex party or lifestyle event, wanted to host one yourself or just curious about what they are all about? If that's a yes for you, you'll ❤️ love this episode: Sex Parties 101: A Guide to Being the Best Host and a Great Guest! Coming 🔥 hot off the heels of our latest party, in this episode we share:
Topics we cover include planning in advance, creating a guest list, getting help, sex-party friendly food and drinks, supplies to have on hand, setting up play areas (including an awesome hack that friends shared with us), consent, taking photos, choosing a theme, STI testing and a whole lot more! If you watch the video you'll see the webpage we create for parties that houses all the information your guests need! Want to get our Ultimate Sex Party Guide when it's available? Reach out and message us through our website! If you need support navigating your open relationship with ease & pleasure we can help! Check out our website where you can find out about our digital course Poly Newbies, different ways you can work directly with us, join our mailing list and access a ton of free resources! | |||
| How to Avoid the Mistakes We Made When Opening Up | 19 Feb 2024 | 00:50:06 | |
Mistakes in relationships are common, but do they have you feeling"poly-frightened"? You know... the jealousy, self-doubt and frustration ... that throbbing pain in your chest and the intense overwhelming feeling that you just aren't going to figure out how to make your open or polyamorous relationship work? And that you'll make the same mistakes over and over again? You're not alone. We've faced these things as have so many others! In this week's episode, we delve into a topic that many of us can relate to: the common mistakes made when first opening up to polyamory or other form of consensual non-monogamy. Join us as we open the vault and candidly share with you some of our dirty laundry - the mistakes we made at the beginning of our polyamory journey and how you can avoid making the same ones! Topics we cover include unicorn hunting, allowing jealousy to fuel poor communication, hierarchy, not understanding all of our "stuff" we were bringing into the relationship (like attachment), STI testing, and talking about what we each wanted out of being consensually non-monogamy. Don't get us wrong. We still mess up from time to time and face tough moments. The difference now is that we have the tools to recover from these things quickly and use them to power our relationship rather than cause micro-tears in the fabric of it. If you need support navigating your open relationship with ease & pleasure we can help! Check out our website where you can find out about our digital course Poly Newbies, different ways you can work directly with us and access a ton of free resources! | |||
| Combatting Jealousy and NRE with Awesome Communication | 12 Feb 2024 | 00:40:46 | |
In this episode, we dive deep into the complex yet rewarding world of polyamory exploring the challenges of jealousy and the intoxicating allure of New Relationship Energy (NRE). Join us as we unpack strategies and insights on fostering open communication to navigate these emotional landscapes and strengthen your polyamorous relationships. Your hosts T&A, coaching and therapy team Tara & André share their experiences and practical advice on identifying and addressing jealousy, offering invaluable tools for individuals and couples alike. They also delve into the concept of NRE – that exciting rush of emotions in new connections – and discuss how to manage both these things with COMMUNICATION. They explore the importance of setting boundaries, practicing radical transparency, and developing a strong foundation of trust and security! Whether you're a seasoned polyamorist or just curious about exploring consensual non-monogamy, this episode provides a roadmap for fostering healthy connections and navigating the unique dynamics of polyamorous relationships. Tune in for an always candid conversation about the beautiful complexities of polyamory and how this can be offset by amazing communication. Want to navigate your relationship with ease and security, sign up for T&A's Poly Newbies Digital Course. Find out more at https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse Learn more about T&A's services and programs and where you can find other content at www.taraandandre.com | |||
| 2: 5 Steps From LIMITATIONS to LIBERATION in Your Polyamorous Relationships | 05 Feb 2024 | 00:49:22 | |
It's a very common story, you excitedly open up an existing relationship, decide transitions to polyamory or explore swinging and feel more LIMITED than you would have expected. And much less pleasure and desire than you fantasized about! In this podcast episode we share the exact 5 steps you can take to shift from relationships filled with LIMITATIONS to ones where you feel 🌈LIBERATED and ❤️ LOVED and where your needs, wants and desires are met!
If you need support being more liberated and secure in your relationship, we can help:
This talk originally aired in our private Facebook group Let's Talk Polyamory as part of our T&A Alphabet Series under the title L is for Limitations, Liberation and Love! | |||
| How Open Relationships Work | 20 Dec 2022 | 00:44:20 | |
Have you ever wondered how open relationships work and if non-monogamy is for you? In this first episode of the Let's Talk Polyamory Podcast with T&A we give you the down low on everything you need to know to begin in consensual non-monogamy including the essential questions you need to ask yourself before diving in as well as the the different types of relationship styles out there, from dipping your toes in and being monogamish, to swinging, polyamory, relationship anarchy and more! We share definitions and answer the burning questions you may be afraid to ask! We created a special worksheet to accompany this episode which you sign up to get it sent to your inbox - https://go.taraandandre.com/openrelationshipsworksheet If you're serious about setting a secure foundation for your open or polyamorous relationship, join us for our next cohort of Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery or sign up for our Poly Newbies Digital Course. And... if you'd like to talk to us directly about your own personal situation book your complimentary Relationship Rescue Call here - https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue | |||
| Building, Rebuilding and Maintaining Trust in Relationships - Part 1 | 28 Oct 2024 | 01:01:36 | |
In this two-part series we take a deep dive into one of the most essential—and sometimes challenging—aspects of relationships: TRUST! Recently many our the Let's Talk Polyamory private Facebook group and in our individual coaching and therapy practices have raised TRUST as an issue they are currently facing in their relationships. For some it is because of a specific situation that occurred, like a betrayal, while for others, the issue of trust goes a bit deeper and stems from past experiences in relationships with previous partners, friends or family. In this special series we explore the ins and outs of building, maintaining, and restoring trust, whether in monogamous or non-monogamous relationships. In Part 1 we cover:
In Part 2, we will tackle the tough topic of rebuilding trust after it’s been lost. Whether you’re looking to set up a rock-solid foundation or need tools to heal from trust setbacks in your relationship or yourself, this series has you covered. This is the perfect starting point for anyone navigating trust challenges and looking for practical, compassionate advice to create more secure, resilient relationships. Comment with your stories of trust or loss of trust and if this episode resonated with you! Please 💖comment, ✅subscribe, ➡️share and 📝write a review so others can find us! We really appreciate it! Show Resources:
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| 69 Ways To Amplify Your Sex Life with Your Partners | 15 Oct 2024 | 00:49:21 | |
Sex... we love it, we want it, and, for many, it is part of our "why" behind being consensually non-monogamous in the first place. Having said that, if we've been intimate, or in a relationship, with someone for a longer period of time, things can sometimes feel a little stale. At the same time, the ⚡️New Relationship Energy (NRE) we may be experiencing with others we are in relationships with might feel exciting and super 🔥hot! In this episode we talk about the 69 Ways to Amplify Your Sex Life with Your Partners! Ok.. so maybe not quite 69, but there are 5 main areas (with lots of sexy suggestions under each) which will support you increasing DESIRE in ALL your relationships:
As part of this cover topics like responsive desire, dirty talking, disentanglement, Sensate Focus and more! Join us at the 💋Toronto Taboo: Everyhing To Do With Sex Show - October 18-20, 2024. We are giving away passes - enter to win via the link below ⬇️ Show References:
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| Can MONO-POLY Relationships Really Work? | 07 Oct 2024 | 00:43:14 | |
Welcome to Season 2 of the Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast! We are kicking things off with a hotly debated topic: Can Mono-Poly Relationships Really Work? What happens when one partner is monogamous while the other embraces polyamory? Are these relationships destined for failure, or can they actually thrive? Mono-Poly relationships come with unique challenges—navigating asymmetrical freedoms (where one partner has multiple emotional and/or sexual relationships and the other doesn’t), balancing time and attention, and dealing with jealousy and insecurity. In this episode, we break down these common struggles, discuss why people might choose this dynamic, and tackle some of the biggest misconceptions. We also share actionable strategies for making these relationships work—like mastering open communication, setting personal boundaries, and using our Values-Based Agreements™ model. Plus, we’ll dive into compersion, or finding joy in your partner’s happiness with others, and talk about the importance of seeking expert support. If you’ve ever wondered whether a Mono-Poly relationship can truly flourish, or if you’re in one and looking for ways to make it work—this episode is for you! Show References:
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| Season 1: It's a Wrap! | 19 Aug 2024 | 00:02:26 | |
Thank you for an amazing first season of the Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast! We will be back with Season 2 and brand new episodes starting in late September 2024. In Season 2 we are inviting some very special guests to join us to take a deeper dive into how you can successfully navigate consensual non-monogamy making it secure, adventurous and even more sexy! In the meantime you can catch up on this season’s episodes where we talked about:
And More! If you want a secure foundation for your open or polyamorous relationship so you can have a lifetime of pleasure and satisfaction, join us for our next cohort of Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery which begins in October. Sign up now and get access right away to all the training modules and content! It will give you extra time to get started before we jump into the live coaching calls in October! Learn More and sign up at: https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery Show references:
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| Kites and Strings: Relationship Roles and Dynamics in Non-Monogamy | 12 Aug 2024 | 00:40:04 | |
It's said that in successful relationships, there's always a KITE and a STRING. Which are you? You may have heard of this metaphor which is often used to describe dynamics in monogamous couples, however in this episode: Kites & Strings: Relationship Roles and Dynamics in Non-Monogamy, we take a polyamory spin on it and talk about how it may apply to the world of non-monogamous relationships as well! We explore what it means to be a kite or a string, how these roles may shift when we interact with other kites and strings either in a dating or lifestyle/swinging situation, and the dynamics of pairing with different types of partners. We also discuss how someone might yearn to step into a different role than they usually occupy—like someone with kids and family responsibilities who gets to feel the exhilarating freedom of being the kite when with another partner and how they might secretly want their other partner to offer them this opportunity as well! We give specific examples of how you can be a “switch” and bring excitement into your relationships and how this might offset resentments around always having to be one thing! And it wouldn’t be a podcast without some playful fun and teasing about our own tendencies to be the kite and string in our relationship! Show References:
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| How Much Do I Want To Know? From DADT To All the Juicy Details | 05 Aug 2024 | 00:44:01 | |
While we all know that open and honest communication is the key to relationships success, a recent University of California study found that there’s plenty of people would rather not know certain details about what their partner is up to! This is one of the big questions that people often struggle with, and are often at odds with, in non-monogamous relationships. Some prefer the DADT - don’t ask, don’t tell - model where everything is unsaid. It’s a … I’d rather not know because what I don’t know won’t hurt me? However, as we said to a coaching client recently and talk about in this episode, when we avoid hearing from our partners about their experiences completely, our brains “fill in the blanks” and that story is often much worse than knowing the truth. There's others that LOVE to share all the details about their encounters with others and those that want to hear everything, but there's the matter of privacy of others to consider. And some people are ok with some details but want certain things left out. We cover all these things and more in this exciting episode - How Much Do I Want To Know: From DADT to ALL the Juicy Details! And if you're newly navigating non-monogamy or facing some bumpy territory, we've got you! Our Poly Newbies Digital Course https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiesspecialoffer - has a proven system that will provide you with a foundation for success! AND is now at a special price for our followers and our online community! Other Show References:
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| 69: Consent is Sexy: Why Enthusiastic Consent Is So Important | 11 Nov 2025 | 01:02:14 | |
Consent isn’t just about saying yes or no, it is much more complex than that. In this episode, Tara and André discuss and explore the nuances of consent in intimate interactions, emphasizing that consent is not a one-time agreement but an active, ongoing conversation that involves both people every step of the way. They unpack what enthusiastic consent really means, how it plays out in different settings like dates, parties, and clubs, and why the idea of “ongoing consent” or “ask once” don’t apply. Instead, consent is a living, dynamic process — one that deepens trust, connection, and genuine desire. And each person plays an active role and responsibility in ensuring mutual comfort. You’ll also hear about some of the most common frameworks used to understand consent — from FRIES (Freely given, Reversible, Informed, Enthusiastic, Specific, developed by Planned Parenthood) and CRISP (Considered, Reversible, Informed Specific, Participant) to frameworks used in the kink community such as SSC (Safe, Sane, Consensual) and RACK (Risk-Aware Consensual Kink). As well as the Yes, No, Maybe List. Each of these helps shape awareness, yet none replace real-time communication. Tara and André share examples of what consent can sound like in the moment even in non-sexual environments - for example a recent example where Tara asked someone - Would you be open to me giving you a compliment?”, why asking builds connection rather than killing the mood, and how saying — or hearing — a clear no can be just as sexy as an enthusiastic yes. And finally they talk about consent and law. This conversation reminds us that consent is the heartbeat of healthy intimacy — an evolving, mutual agreement that requires awareness, communication, and care. Want to hear T&A live? Join them on December 10, 2025 for Reconnect Wednesday at the Mermaid Lounge just outside Toronto. Information about the Mermaid Lounge at https://mermaidlounge.ca/. Tickets at https://thexclub.net/event_description.php?event=452. 📖 Episode Chapters: 3:07 Understanding Consent 6:07 Ongoing Consent: Myths & Realities 12:21 Consent Frameworks 23:14 The Nuances of Consent 34:25 Navigating Compliments & Consent 40:20 Consent in Different Scenarios 55:50 The Legal Landscape of Consent Show Resources:
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| 68: Sex & Lifestyle Clubs 101: What to Expect and How to Prepare (Live from the Mermaid Lounge) | 04 Nov 2025 | 00:33:01 | |
Ever wondered what it’s really like to go to a sex or lifestyle club for the first time — and what to do to prepare? Or maybe you’ve been before and the experience wasn’t what you hoped? In this special episode Tara is live on location at the Mermaid Lounge just outside Toronto, Ontario, joined by Event Host Amy,! Together, they explore what to expect when visiting a lifestyle space — from atmosphere and etiquette to safety, consent, and connection. You’ll get an insider tour of the newly renovated Mermaid Lounge and adjoining X-Club and hear practical guidance for what to do before, during, and after your visit to spaces like these so the experience feels positive, secure, and aligned with your personal values and boundaries. Included in this discussion is how to plan before the event with a partner — including what scenarios you’re open to exploring and how you’ll check-in throughout the visit and communicate if one of you feels uncomfortable or needs support once you’re there. Even with the best planning, emotions can arise, so having a shared plan for navigating them helps everyone feel safe and connected. Whether you’re curious, nervous, or simply exploring new sides of your sexuality, this episode will help you feel prepared and confident. 🎧 Tune in for:
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| 59: How to Attract (And Keep) Better Poly Partners | 16 Jul 2025 | 00:39:17 | |
In this episode we’re digging into the archives to bring you a conversation that originally aired live in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook group. Since Facebook now only stores live videos for 30 days, we’re working behind the scenes to download and share some of those gems here on the podcast. In this episode, we dive into a question we hear all the time: How do I attract (and keep) better poly partners? Whether you’re new to non-monogamy or have been dating for a while, this episode is full of insight, real stories, and practical tools. We talk about:
We also share how our Securely Polyamorous Framework—which we teach in our course and coaching program—applies directly to dating and the process of meeting and keeping great partners. We explore things like communication attunement, knowing what you want, setting personal boundaries, creating values-based agreements and nurturing connections that are built to last. And if you’ve ever found yourself attracting people who aren’t a fit (or who vanish after a great first date), we talk about the unconscious ways that might be happening—and what you can do to shift it. 🎁 BONUS! This week, we’re sharing our Online Dating Guide which includes:✅ A list of our favourite dating sites for non-monogamous folks✅ Tips for writing a standout profile✅ An online dating checklist✅ Links to related trainings and podcasts👉Download it for free here: https://go.letstalkpolyamory.com/onlinedatingguide 💬 Want to connect with others who get it? Join our private Facebook group:🔗 https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpolyamory ⚡️ Curious about Coaching? Sign up for a Pay What You Can Coaching Call with Tara at: 🔗 https://go.taraandandre.com/pwyccoachingsession ⚡️Looking for Therapy? Book a complimentary therapy consultation with André Turcotte at https://book.a-psych-online.com/therapyconsultation ✨You can also explore other ways to work with us as well as access other great resources at:🔗 https://www.taraandandre.com | |||
| 58: What Does It Mean to Be Visible? Being Out and Open as Polyamorous | 09 Jul 2025 | 00:51:53 | |
At the time of recording this episode, it’s the Week of Visibility for Non-Monogamy — July 7–13, 2025. This global campaign and week of action, created by Open Love NY, celebrates the many ways people love, connect, and relate outside of monogamy—including polyamory, open relationships, relationship anarchy, swinging, and more. The Week of Visibility exists to:
In this episode, we explore what it means to be visible as people who practice consensual non-monogamy. We reflect on our own experiences around coming out—Tara shares in detail what it was like to come out as non-monogamous to her family, why it mattered, how we prepared, what happened, and how it’s going now. André shares about coming out to his mother—and her openness to the idea and her love. We also walk through each day’s theme from the Week of Visibility: History & Culture, Identity & Inclusion, Myths & Misconceptions, Public & Private, Law & Advocacy, and Integration & Reflection. For each, we offer personal reflections and suggest actions you can take to explore what visibility looks like for you—whether that means being out and proud, private and processing, or somewhere in between. 💜 IMPORTANT NOTE:We’re offering visibility as an invitation, not a prescription.Visibility is powerful—but it’s not always accessible or safe. You are allowed to choose what’s right for you. 🔗 Mentioned in the Show:
📝 Connect with Us We’re Tara & André—coaches, educators, and polyamory advocates helping people create secure, satisfying, and sexy non-monogamous relationships. 📱 Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/taraandandre/ ⚡️ TikTok →https://www.tiktok.com/@letstalkpolyamory 🌐 Learn more about our programs and services or book a consultation call → https://www.taraandandre.com | |||
| 57: Relationship Burnout: How to Make LRE feel like NRE Again | 30 Jun 2025 | 00:51:22 | |
Feeling disconnected or depleted in your long-term relationship while totally lit up by someone new? You're not broken—and neither is your relationship. This is a natural progression of relationships, but it doesn't have to be the death knell! In this episode of the Let’s Talk Polyamory Podcast, we explore what happens when burnout shows up in your long-term relationship—often the one where you share a home, kids, responsibilities or calendar—while you’re riding the high of New Relationship Energy (NRE) somewhere else. Inspired by a recent CNN article and relationship expert Esther Perel’s insights, we unpack the real causes of burnout: emotional labor, domestic imbalance, identity loss, over-functioning, and the exhaustion of being the constant container for your partner’s emotions. We also share our own personal stories about what helps us keep our long-term relationship feeling playful, connected, and fresh—even while managing real-life stressors. From RAADAR Relationship Reviews and quality time rituals, to creating intentional transitions around new connections, we’ll walk you through practical ways to rekindle the energy you crave—including simple habits backed by research, like the Gottmans’ 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions that helps relationships stay strong and emotionally resilient. In this episode, we cover:💡 What burnout really looks like in long-term relationships🧯 The top causes of relationship fatigue (hint: it’s not just about desire)💘 Why NRE feels so good—and how to channel that energy intentionally into other relationship🛠️ Tools for making LRE feel exciting again (without pretending it’s brand new)👫 Our own practices for keeping long-term love feeling alive 💌 Ready for deeper support? Check out our Poly Newbies Digital Course or join us in the next round of our Polyamory Mastery Program. Links in the show resources below👇 Show Resources:
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| 56: Should Polyamory Be Part of 🏳️🌈Pride Celebrations? | 23 Jun 2025 | 00:21:35 | |
Re-released in honour of Toronto Pride! June is 🏳️🌈Pride Month in many parts of the world, including here in Toronto, where we've proudly participated in both official and unofficial Pride events over the years—including walking in the parade. One question that often sparks lively debate is: Should relational identities like polyamory be included in Pride? Some argue that Pride is about celebrating sexual and gender identities, and that polyamory and other relational identities don't belong under that umbrella. Others believe that polyamory is a valid identity that deserves visibility—especially when legal recognition, social support, and relationship rights are still lacking. In this episode, we make an intentional effort to explore both sides of this discussion—sharing different perspectives on where polyamory fits within the broader 2SLGBTQIA+ movement. We also touch on the history of how Pride began and the deeper roots of what this celebration represents. We’re revisiting a conversation originally recorded in our private Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook group. At the time, we had been running our weekly livestream series Mondays with Tara and André there —something we started during the pandemic as a way to stay connected, offer support, and spark real conversations. You’ll hear us share a little bit about how that came to be at the beginning of the episode. This particular livestream was recorded just before the 2022 Toronto Pride Parade, when we organized a walking float with members of our community. We did it again in 2023, that time in collaboration with Polyamorous Living Toronto! ⭐️ The sound and video quality isn’t studio-perfect (neither are we!), but we’ve done our best to clean it up. We hope this episode sparks meaningful dialogue—because that’s what Pride is all about. Let us know in the Comments what you think: And share your PRIDE stories and photos in our Let's Talk Polyamory group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly Show Resources:
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| 55: The 36 Questions that May Lead to Love… and the Other 36 to Stay in Love | 10 Jun 2025 | 00:45:14 | |
In 1997, psychologists Arthur Aron and Elaine Aron published the results of a study in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin exploring how emotional intimacy between strangers could be accelerated through structured vulnerability. Their method? A series of 36 questions, divided into three sets that become increasingly personal—and it worked. The list became more widely known in 2015 when writer Mandy Len Catron shared her experience with the questions in her viral New York Times article, “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This.” She tried the questions herself—and fell in love. But what happens after you fall in love? We recently revisited the original 36 questions as a couple, and while we loved the experience, we felt there were some essential conversations these questions didn't cover, especially if you’re planning to live together, share a life, or deepen a long-term relationship . The result...our own follow-up list: The Other 36 Questions You Need to Ask to Stay in Love These are questions we believe every couple (or triad, or quad!) should ask—regardless of how you identify across the spectrum of monogamy to non-monogamy. Here’s what we felt was missing—and what we intentionally added:
In this episode, we share our experience answering the original 36 questions together, highlight a few of our favourite prompts and how we answered them, and introduce you to our full list of additions—including why we believe they matter! 📝 Free Resource: We created a downloadable one-pager with all 72 questions—the original 36 plus our “Other 36”—grouped by theme, so you can explore them at your own pace. Whether you're starting something new or rekindling a long-term relationship, these questions are a powerful way to build deeper intimacy, open honest conversations, and get to know your partner(s) on a whole new level. Show Resources:
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| J is for JEALOUSY & the 7 Things You Can Do to Feel More SECURE | 28 May 2025 | 00:34:58 | |
Jealousy… no one wants to feel it, and many of us hope if we ignore it, it’ll just go away. But like going to the dentist, it’s something that’s good for you—and like a cavity, jealousy has to be addressed. This episode is part of our T&A Alphabet Series, where we explore the big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex—one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, we bring you J is for Jealousy! Whether you like it or not, you’re going to encounter jealousy—your own or someone else’s. How will you be affected by it? How will you handle it? That’s what we’re exploring in this conversation. We talk about what jealousy really is, and the deeper emotions that often fuel it—like insecurity, fear, lack of safety, and uncertainty. We might sense a threat that our partner could be “taken” from us, and that fear can lead to reactive behaviors that don’t serve us or our relationships. We also offer practical guidance for working through jealousy, including 7 strategies to shift your mindset, communicate better, and reconnect with what’s good in your relationship—rather than clinging tightly or spiralling into worst-case scenarios. And we remind you: jealousy isn’t all bad. It’s an internal alert system. It means there’s something worth paying attention to. This episode touches on one of the core modules of our Polyamory Mastery program—our deep dive signature group coaching experience for people ready to create secure, satisfying, and sexy non-monogamous relationships. We’ll be running a small-group spring cohort. If you’re interested, reach out to tara@hello.taraandandre.com and visit taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery for more details on the program. Show Resources:
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| 53: Where Are We Now? De-escalation One Year Later | 20 May 2025 | 00:49:17 | |
Almost a year ago and just shy of 7 years of being together, we made a decision to de-escalate our non-monogamous relationship. It was met with a lot of questions and concerns from close friends and family - are you breaking up? Do you no longer love each other etc. We even released a special podcast on this topic - (S1. Ep 16) Is It Time To Deescalate My Relationship - and yet there were still some skeptics! And now, over 365 days later, reflecting on this experience, we know it was the absolute right decision for us (even though there were some tough spots to navigate) and has in fact strengthened our connection! In this deeply personal episode we catch you up on what prompted the decision, how we felt at the time, how it went and how things are now! We also review what de-escalation means and how it differs from breaking up, and the types of situations that might prompt this kind of change in a relationship. And for those who don’t intend on de-escalating, or stop living together, we share examples of how you can breathe more life into your relationships by spending intentional time together and creating space and time to restore your own independence. Exciting news: As we announced in this episode we are considering running a Spring cohort of our Polyamory Mastery group coaching program—but we need at least 5 couples (or individuals) to commit to make it happen. This is our deeper dive group coaching experience for people who are looking for real transformation, and support that actually makes a difference in creating secure, satisfying and sexy non monogamous relationships! This program includes:
You can find out more about the program here - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery and to apply, drop us an email at tara@hello.taraandandre.com. To get a bit of background on where we were when we decided to do this we suggest you catch up on the podcast we recorded and listen to our Poly Diaries journal entries from last year! See links in the show resources below. Show Resources:
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| 52: I is for INSECURITY and the 3 Things You Can Do to Feel More Secure | 13 May 2025 | 00:32:07 | |
We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series, where we explore the big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex—one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, this episode is all about the letter I: I is for Insecurity and the 3 Things You Can Do to Feel More Secure. Insecurity can show up as self-doubt, anxiety, or the sense that you're vulnerable to harm or rejection. In open or polyamorous relationships, it often feels like living on high alert—waiting for the next fire to put out. In this episode, we dig into the connection between insecurity and jealousy, and share three key practices to help you feel more grounded and secure:
We also explore:
If jealousy and insecurity are keeping you from feeling at ease in your consensually non-monogamous relationships, check out our self-paced Poly Newbies Digital Course https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse or go deeper with our Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery - program, which includes live coaching with us. Show Resources:
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| 51: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health | 05 May 2025 | 00:48:54 | |
Non-monogamous relationships can offer joy, freedom, and deep connection—but they can also stir up intense emotional waves. In honour of Mental Health Week in Canada, this heartfelt and practical episode explores what it really looks like to care for your mental health while navigating non-monogamy. Whether you're facing overwhelm, burnout, comparison, or jealousy—or just want to feel less alone—this conversation is for you. In this episode we cover:
💛 Special episode resource: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health: Worksheet + Action Planning Guide — a free tool to help you reflect, reset, and take practical steps toward improving your mental health and your relationships! Get it here 👇 https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/mentalhealth This episode is your reminder: struggling doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong—it means you’re human. Seeking support is a sign of strength. Please share this episode with someone who might need it. If you’re considering self-harm or harming others, please reach out to a local crisis line, call 911, or go to the nearest emergency room. You are not alone. Show Resources:
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| 50: Rules vs Boundaries vs Agreements: How to Set Your Non-Monogamous Relationships Up for Success | 29 Apr 2025 | 00:44:00 | |
You’ve opened up your relationship or decided to explore non-monogamy, and at first, you’re excited — until BOOM — you're hit with a wave of feelings: jealousy, insecurity, anger, hurt... You pump the brakes and set up rules to try to protect yourself and your partners from all this discomfort. But it doesn’t work. The rules feel punitive, like you're on a leash (and not the fun, kinky kind), and you're still overwhelmed with emotions. In this episode, we’re talking about the difference between rules, boundaries, and agreements — and why shifting from punitive rules to collaborative agreements is the real key to feeling secure. We introduce the Values-Based Agreement™ Model we developed and teach our clients, and share what it looks like in our own relationship! We also dive into:
As a bonus, we also dig into communication tools like active listening, plus tips for dealing with feedback, criticisms, and resentments — all key skills for creating stronger, more resilient relationships. It’s a jam-packed episode full of practical tools, real talk, and real-world examples! ✨ If you want to dive even deeper into boundaries, check out our episode: Pardon Me But You’re Stepping On My Boundaries. Show Resources:
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| 67: Breaking Taboos in Sex & Relationships - Part 2 | 14 Oct 2025 | 00:52:55 | |
In Part 2 we continue our deep dive into the complex world of sex, relationships, and the taboos that shape them. We explore what makes certain topics so charged, how our personal experiences influence what we consider “off-limits,” and why breaking taboos can lead to more honest and connected relationships. 💬 In this episode:
It’s a thoughtful, candid conversation about where our edges come from, how they evolve, and why it’s worth questioning them in pursuit of deeper authenticity and connection. ✨ Catch us live!We will be at Booth 322 at the Toronto Taboo Show, October 17–19, 2025. We will be giving seminars Friday at 6:30 PM and Saturday at 8:30 PM on Non-Monogamy Essentials: Making it Secure, Satisfying, and Sexy! 📖 Episode Chapters: 00:00 — Breaking Taboos in Sex and Relationships 05:20 — Exploring Non-Monogamy and Its Misunderstandings 10:48 — Personal Experiences with Sexuality and Openness 16:37 — Addressing Common Taboos and Myths in Non-Monogamy 25:08 — Navigating Relationship Taboos 29:14 — The Complexity of Secret Partners 31:55 — Reprioritizing Partners in Non-Monogamy 36:21 — Challenging Myths About Polyamory 38:58 — Sexual Health and Multiple Partners 40:40 — Consent and Altered States 41:43 — The Pressure of “Best” Sex 44:11 — The Importance of Breaking Taboos Show Resources:
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| 49: H is for Sexual HEALTH and HAIR | 13 Apr 2025 | 00:38:01 | |
We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series, where we tackle big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex — one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook Community, this episode is all about the letter H - H is for Sexual HEALTH and HAIR! While it can be an uncomfortable subject for some (at least until you get used to it), being open about sexual health and regular testing is crucial — especially when you have multiple sexual partners. For us, getting tested regularly has become a badge of honour, not something to be embarrassed about. In this episode, we break down the difference between an STD (Sexually Transmitted Disease) and an STI (Sexually Transmitted Infection), and why the shift in terminology matters. We talk about removing the stigma around testing, STIs, and sexuality — and how to navigate those conversations with partners in a way that’s honest, caring, and responsible. We share the kinds of tests you should ask for (because not everything is included by default), and discuss ways to reduce or prevent the incidence of STIs. Yes, we talk about condoms and barriers — but also about vaccines (like HPV and Hepatitis), rinsing your mouth and washing your hands between partners, and even bringing our own safer sex kits to parties and clubs. And then we shift gears — but stay close to the skin — with a chat about HAIR ... especially the hair down there. We unpack how history, pop culture and media have influenced how we feel about hair, and how that connects to our sense of self, body image, self-worth, and how we show up in intimate moments. Some people love it, some hate it, some wax it, some grow it — and some braid it if they’re feeling fancy. Whatever your vibe, we’re here to say: there’s no “right” way to be hairy… or not. What matters is choice, consent, and comfort — just like every other part of your sexuality. Oh — and yes, we throw in a few bonus “H” words along the way. 😉 As always, there’s some laughter, some real talk, and important info for anyone who is sexually active — no matter your relationship style. Show Resources:
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