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Song Of Songs (part 3) -- a celebration of covenant sex and romantic passion [185]
In this episode we conclude our Song of Songs series with a break down the biggest interpretive debates around Song of Songs and explain why a purely allegorical reading collapses the text into endless guesswork. We also name the book’s core themes, showing how covenant marriage, erotic desire, and spiritual meaning fit together without embarrassment.
why Song of Songs often gets treated as allegory only
what an allegory is and why the text never labels itself that way
how bad presuppositions about sex distort Bible interpretation
why canonicity objections usually come from discomfort
how Scripture uses marriage as a metaphor without erasing earthly marriage
examples of hymn lyrics that ignore context
Song of Songs themes: mutual pleasure, exclusivity, intimacy, passion, beauty
Sign up for the annual Intimate Covenant Marriage Retreat where we will dig into these themes from the Song of Songs: intimatecovenant.com/retreat
For a deeper dive, here's a list recommended resources to expand your perspective to help with reading the Song of Songs:
Allender, Dan B., and Tremper Longman III. God Loves Sex: An Honest Conversation about Sexual Desire and Holiness. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2014.
Alter, Robert, trans. Strong as Death Is Love: The Song of Songs, Ruth, Esther, Jonah, and Daniel: A Translation with Commentary. New York: W. W. Norton & Company, 2015.
Longman III, Tremper. Song of Songs. New International Commentary on the Old Testament. Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2001.
Pope, Marvin H. Song of Songs: A New Translation with Introduction and Commentary. The Anchor Bible, vol. 7C. Garden City, NY: Doubleday, 1977.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
We keep our Song of Songs series going by unpacking the main characters and what their symbolism says about marriage, desire, and intimacy.
why the lovers are unnamed and ageless, inviting us to see ourselves in the poems
why we read the Song of Songs as an anthology of love poems rather than a strict timeline
the wife as the primary voice, including initiation, pursuit, and desire
body image and modest self-talk contrasted with a husband’s verbal affirmation
the husband as “beloved,” including the power of affectionate, honoring language
daughters of Jerusalem as a chorus for discipleship and sexual wisdom
the mother’s role in sexual instruction and marriage formation
brothers and watchmen as cultural forces that restrict, harm, or create barriers
sexual trauma named in the text and the hope of healing through safe intimacy
For a deeper dive, here's a list recommended resources to expand your perspective to help with reading the Song of Songs:
Allender, Dan B., and Tremper Longman III. God Loves Sex: An Honest Conversation about Sexual Desire and Holiness. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2014.
Alter, Robert, trans. Strong as Death Is Love: The Song of Songs, Ruth, Esther, Jonah, and Daniel: A Translation with Commentary. New York: W. W. Norton & Company, 2015.
Longman III, Tremper. Song of Songs. New International Commentary on the Old Testament. Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2001.
Pope, Marvin H. Song of Songs: A New Translation with Introduction and Commentary. The Anchor Bible, vol. 7C. Garden City, NY: Doubleday, 1977.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
We're starting a series to lay the groundwork for reading the Song of Songs with clarity. In this episode we discuss the title, authorship, and the book’s unique structure. We share why our approach may feel less traditional (it's really not), yet still honors Scripture and helps couples talk about covenant love and sex without forcing the text into a storyline it never claims to be.
why we call it Song of Songs rather than Song of Solomon
where the book sits in the Hebrew canon and why it is read at Passover
what Solomon’s name might signal without proving authorship
why Aramaic and historical clues suggest a later composition
how poetic devices and double entendre shape meaning and modesty
why a narrative plot creates confusion and why an anthology reading fits better
how seeing it as a romantic playlist helps couples study and discuss it together
Join us at the annual Intimate Covenant Marriage Retreat. This year our theme is BELOVED - exploring love and romance in the Song of Songs.
For a deeper dive, here's a list recommended resources to expand your perspective and help in reading the Song of Songs:
Allender, Dan B., and Tremper Longman III. God Loves Sex: An Honest Conversation about Sexual Desire and Holiness. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2014.
Alter, Robert, trans. Strong as Death Is Love: The Song of Songs, Ruth, Esther, Jonah, and Daniel: A Translation with Commentary. New York: W. W. Norton & Company, 2015.
Longman III, Tremper. Song of Songs. New International Commentary on the Old Testament. Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2001.
Pope, Marvin H. Song of Songs: A New Translation with Introduction and Commentary. The Anchor Bible, vol. 7C. Garden City, NY: Doubleday, 1977.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
We explore findings from three recent scientific studies that show how flexible expectations, strong relationships, and emotional meaning shape a lifetime of sexual satisfaction in marriage.
Bouchard KN, Cormier M, Huberman JS, Rosen NO. Sexual script flexibility and sexual well-being in long-term couples. Journal of Sexual Medicine. 2023.
Tavares IM, Rosen NO, Heiman JR, Nobre PJ. Longitudinal associations between relational and sexual well-being. Family Process. 2024.
Henninger W, Heinz M, Taylor N. Love, Sex & Aging. Social Sciences. 2025.
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Additional info:
Ladies, make your voice and experience heard, take part in new sex research: The Lived Experience of Marital Sex: Women's Perspectives --www.surveymonkey.com/r/QRWQPWK
RiverHills Retreat Marriage Enrichment Weekend -- Hayden, Alabama; April 18th. Register here: intimatecovenant/alabama
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
In this episode, we share a few more segments from our live Q&A at the 2025 Annual Retreat; all of these had to do with the pursuer-responder dynamic. Specifically, we covered questions about:
What is God teaching me through the pursuer-responder dynamic?
Is compromise the answer to sexual desire discrepancy?
What if, despite the sterotype, the husband doesn’t want sex?
How should a wife deal with the role of reluctant dual-pursuer?
Register at intimatecovenant.com/Alabama for the River Hills Retreat Marriage Enrichment Weekend in North Alabama.
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
What happens when a room full of couples asks the questions most people are afraid to say out loud? We lean into the hard stuff: purity culture hangovers, what “counts” as sex, how to tell the truth without breaking trust, and how aging bodies can still enjoy rich, connected intimacy. Recorded live at our Intimate Covenant Marriage Retreat, this candid Q&A blends biblical wisdom, practical tools, and warm honesty to help you move from silence and shame to clarity and closeness.
Ready to invest in your marriage? Subscribe, share this episode with your spouse, and register for our September retreat when doors open on February 14th.
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Date Your Spouse — https://shop.dateyourspouse.com/?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx Strengthening marriages one date at a time. Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes!
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Today we’re sharing some excerpts from our live Q&A session during a recent Marriage Day in Illinois. Listen to our responses to questions about:
How to find unity of spiritual purpose when we have different passions?
As a wife, how do I avoid nagging in my role to be a helpmeet?
How can we create a community for porn recovery and support for betrayed spouses?
Practically speaking, how do we pray together as a couple?
How do I deal with with sexual dysfunction?
Warning: This podcast covers necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Bring Intimate Covenant to your community! Book a Marriage Day in 2026—email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Date Your Spouse — https://shop.dateyourspouse.com/?sca_ref=6278443.H6eWDeXGfx Strengthening marriages one date at a time. Shop from this link and your part of your purchase will help support Intimate Covenant. Check out their Sexy Subscription Boxes!
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
We trace how Darwin and Freud shaped cultural ideas about sex and how these philosophies have infiltrated even modern religion.
Darwin and Freud both rejected a divine order of the universe or a spiritual guide for moral and ethical living. Their influences profoundly shape the course of modern philosophy and our current society.
Many modern Christians have unwittingly adopted influences from Darwin and Freud into their own theology, especially in how we approach sexuality and sexual desire.
We must reject the idea that sex is purely biological or that sex is in contrast to spirituality. The Bible teaches that sexuality is created by God with spiritual significance, purpose and importance.
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Augustine and subsequent Medieval sexual theology have profoundly influenced modern Christian teachings on sexuality, often causing unnecessary shame and restrictions that aren't biblically based. During the Middle Ages, the influence of Augustine, with echoes of Greek philosophy, intensified into even more unnecessarily restrictive laws and unbiblical teachings about sex. Contrary to Augustine and classic Catholic doctrine, celibacy is not more holy than marriage. The Bible teaches that marriage and the pleasures of married sex are a gift from God.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Matt and Jenn explore how ancient Greek philosophy has shaped modern Christian attitudes toward sexuality, creating an unbiblical culture of shame and stigma around sexual desire.
• Plato's dualism in the 4th century BC separated body and soul, viewing bodily desires as inferior to spiritual pursuits • Stoicism further emphasized suppression of passions, teaching that sex was only acceptable within marriage and solely for procreation • The Apostle Paul directly confronted these philosophies, calling those who forbid marriage and require abstinence "liars" devoted to "deceitful spirits" • Paul teaches in 1 Timothy 4 that everything created by God is good and should be received with thanksgiving • The biblical solution to misdirected desire isn't suppression but redirection toward what truly fulfills • Proverbs 5 instructs husbands to "be intoxicated" by their wives' love—language of abundance, not restraint • Sexual desire isn't worldly or dangerous but God-designed to teach us about our need for connection • Modern Christians must examine where their beliefs about sexuality come from—Scripture or Greek philosophy
Join us for our annual retreat, September 18-20th, focusing on ONEness in marriage. Register at intimatecovenent.com/retreat.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Matt and Jenn use a cooking analogy to explore how great married sex requires more than just "spices" – it needs solid foundational ingredients of spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical connection.
• Adding more spice to bad ingredients doesn't make a dish better; it likely makes it worse. • In struggling marriages, focusing solely on sexual excitement without addressing overall closeness leaves couples unsatisfied • All aspects of intimacy (spiritual, emotional, mental, physical) are interconnected and strengthen each other • The upcoming annual retreat will explore the theme "One" and these interconnected aspects of intimacy.
Join us for our annual marriage retreat, September 18-20, featuring special musical guest Trey Keller! Register at intimatecovenantcom/retreat. If you'd like to help couples attend through our scholarship fund, donate here: https://intimatecovenant.com/donate/
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products.
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Warning: We cover necessary and important topics about the marriage relationship and sex. We use frank language without being crude or crass. Our approach is biblical and wholesome, but not intended for singles — especially not for children.
Difficult conversations are at the heart of successful marriages, yet many struggle with vulnerability and emotional expression. We explore practical ways to share feelings authentically and address how to reveal past mistakes you've been hiding.
Sharing your feelings can be a difficult conversation for some. This is a skill which may require intentional practice.
Vulnerability is the heart of intimate relationships. Revealing the fullness of yourself is the only way to be loved for who you really are.
Join us on Patreon to access our Emotion Wheel and other helpful resources: Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn tackle the concept of "organic sex" and whether truly spontaneous intimacy is even possible in a long-term marriage. The myth that good sex should just naturally happen without planning or effort has damaged many marriages and created unrealistic expectations.
• Sex is natural but not naturally perfect - it requires intentional cultivation • Many couples believe the Hollywood myth that passionate encounters should happen effortlessly • The best sex flows from creating space for connection across all dimensions of intimacy • Physical intimacy is not separate from emotional, spiritual, and intellectual connection • Seemingly "spontaneous" encounters are actually built on intentional groundwork • Great sex isn't about spontaneity but about co-creating an environment where intimacy flourishes • Most of what builds great sex happens outside the bedroom through everyday connection • When couples focus on building multi-level intimacy, sex becomes a natural byproduct
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share an encore episode about reassessing your expectations for your marriage and moving the trajectory of your relationship through personal investment.
Mature past the selfish motivations of relationship and begin to see the true fulfillment of covenant love built on self-sacrifice — in your marriage and in your relationship to God.
Instead of asking "What do I want FROM my marriage?", change your perspective with a new question: “What do I want FOR my marriage?” Consider what more you can offer toward your covenant?
Begin the assessment of your relationship with humility and self-reflection. Then, have a conversation with your spouse to determine what you can do for them and for your marriage.
Download our State of the Covenant resource to help you assess your marriage and start the conversations to build better intimacy in 2025. intimatecovenant.com/shop
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer the following listener questions:
What advice do you have for couples that have great sex but struggle talking about sex? We’ve tried conversation starters but the answers are always brief.
I’m ashamed how much value I place on my spouses physical appearance. Self-improvement is a good virtue, but how do I ensure my motives are not immoral or shallow
I enjoy sleeping naked. My wife hates it. How can I encourage her to try & embrace it regularly. It's a great sensual way to enjoy each other without having sex.
I crave physical touch (not just sexually), as a pursuer how do ask for this without coming across as needy? Rub my back, hold my hand, hug me. How do I ask?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share another set of clips from the Q&A session at our recent Annual Marriage Retreat. We cover the following questions:
What ways can I warm my spouse up to more public displays of affection?
Discuss navigating, in different seasons, sexual pursuer/responder roles switching. It's not a smooth transition and can be confusing.
What if you are the sexual AND the emotional persuer??
I love giving my wife oral pleasure. She never reciprocates yet enjoys receiving. How do I keep from feeling resentful & help her to grow her desire for this?
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coconu is committed to helping people lead healthier, happier lives by offering 100% safe and organic personal care products. Your purchase helps support Intimate Covenant AND you get 15% OFF. Coupon Code: intimateconvenant
Ginger & Peach — https://www.gingerandpeachlingerie.com/ Ginger & Peach lingerie is a Christian husband and wife owned brand bringing classy, model-free lingerie to the market. Get 10% off your order and support Intimate Covenant with code: “INTIMATECOVENANT"
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
This episode is an excerpt from the live Q&A session at the 2024 Annual Marriage Retreat. We’re sharing our response to the following question: “Can you go into further detail on how the act of sex can glorify God?” We’re also sharing our responses to questions about sex toys, solo masturbation, modeling a healthy sexual relationship for your kids, and when to talk to your kids about pornography.
We also want to thank the sponsors of this year's Retreat:
Married Dance
Coconu
The Dating Divas
Honoring Intimates
Ginger & Peach
Ultimate Intimacy
Show Her Off
The Adventure Challenge
J. Parker
Please support these affiliate companies that support Intimate Covenant:
Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 We’re a Christian-friendly, marriage-centered sex toy and marital aid store for couples that’s nudity-free. Shop from this link for special savings and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant.
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the complaint, "My spouse never initiates sex." So, whose job is it, anyway? How can I get my spouse to initiate more often?
Whether it’s sexual connection or any other aspect of your relationship, if you sense a lack of it in your relationship, it’s up to you to initiate what is missing.
If you feel like you are the only one initiating, keep striving. But, recognize — with gratitude — that your spouse may be contributing a whole lot more to your sexual and emotional relationship than what you immediately recognize.
Responders, you can learn to initiate in ways that are comfortable for you and this effort will speak volumes of love to your pursuer.
What Does Sex Mean To My Spouse? If you’ve been married for more than 5 minutes, you recognize that you and your spouse see sex differently. Our intention with this eCourse is to challenge you to think about your sexual relationship in ways that you might not have ever considered before. We want to facilitate deep introspection and fruitful conversations between you and your spouse to help you build intimacy and oneness.
Make Better Connections We all suffer occasions when our attempts to connect are ignored or rejected. This course will help you make better connections in your marriage — emotionally and sexually. Learn to pursue and respond to your spouse with passionate, irresistible vulnerability
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn compare the sexual relationship to a hurricane. Sex, like a hurricane, is a powerful, God-given force. While we can’t direct the path of a hurricane, quiet the gale-force winds, or suppress the rising waters, we do have control over the effects of sex in our own marriages.
The forces of a hurricane are mostly destructive. But the power of sexual desire can be channeled to constructive, passionate and intimate relationship.
The damage of hurricane-driven wind and water is unavoidable, but the damage of poorly planned sex is entirely preventable.
When confronted by unexpected storms in your sex-life, use these challenges to further demonstrate your creativity and self-sacrificial love.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to a listener's email from a wife who is feeling rejected because her husband, the usual sexual pursuer, has stopped initiating. We'll explore some of the reasons this might be happening and what she can do about it. Plus, we give some personal updates and exciting announcements about the future of Intimate Covenant.
Sexual pursuers may stop for many reasons and it’s often more complicated that just hormones.
A change in this dynamic in your relationship should never be ignored and requires an important conversation.
The pursuer in this dynamic must be willing to respond with enthusiasm and continue to reach out to make connections wherever possible.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some of the latest TikTok relationship tests and whether there is something we can learn about our marriages from these viral trends.
If you really want to test your relationship, pick up a mirror rather than a microscope. Only you can change you.
“Turn towards” rather than “turning away” from your spouse by making and receiving bids for connection.
Whether your prior rejections have been intentional or unintentional, challenge yourself to see and lean into those bids for connection from your spouse.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt and Jenn discuss the resurging popularity of sleeping in separate bedrooms. We'll consider the reasons why a couple might choose this option and whether it might be wise for your marriage. In addition, we'll discuss some of the consequences of spouses who have separate bedtimes.
Every step we take away from our spouses, especially physically, has inevitable negative long-term consequences for the relationship. The decision to sleep apart should be weighed carefully and be constantly reevaluated.
As much as is within your power, eliminate the barriers to sleeping together so that you can get be in bed with each other as often as possible.
Likewise, separate bedtimes also promote emotional and physical drift away from each other, allowing opportunity for selfishness and betrayal.
As promised, here are the sources for the data that we referenced in this episode:
Elsey, Taylor et al. “The role of couple sleep concordance in sleep quality: Attachment as a moderator of associations.” Journal of sleep research vol. 28,5 (2019): e12825.
Drews HJ, Drews A. Couple Relationships Are Associated With Increased REM Sleep-A Proof-of-Concept Analysis of a Large Dataset Using Ambulatory Polysomnography. Front Psychiatry. 2021 May 10;12:641102.
Richter, K., Adam, S., Geiss, L., Peter, L., & Niklewski, G. (2016). Two in a bed: The influence of couple sleeping and chronotypes on relationship and sleep. An overview. Chronobiology International, 33(10), 1464–1472.
Troxel WM; Buysse DJ; Matthews KA; Kravitz HM; Bromberger JT; Sowers M; Hall MH. Marital/cohabitation status and history in relation to sleep in midlife women. SLEEP 2010;33(7):973-981.
Chiao, Chi et al. “Loneliness in older parents: marital transitions, family and social connections, and separate bedrooms for sleep.” BMC geriatrics vol. 21,1 590. 22 Oct. 2021
Larson JH, Crane DR, Smith CW. (1991). Morning and night couples: The effect of wake and sleep patterns on marital adjustment. J Marital Fam Ther. 17:53–65.
Ulfberg J, Carter N, Talback M, Edling C. (2000). Adverse health effects among women living with heavy snorers. Health Care Women Int. 21:81–90.
Gordon, A. M., & Chen, S. (2014). The Role of Sleep in Interpersonal Conflict: Do Sleepless Nights Mean Worse Fights? Social Psychological and Personality Science, 5(2), 168-175.
Cartwright, R D, and S Knight. “Silent partners: the wives of sleep apneic patients.” Sleep vol. 10,3 (1987): 244-8.
Cascais Costa C, Afreixo V, Cravo J. Impact of Obstructive Sleep Apnea Treatment on Marital Relationships: Sleeping Together Again? Cureus. 2023 Oct 5;15(10):e46513.
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In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some experiences from their recent trip to China and some life-changing lessons they are bringing back. We think these lessons will impact your marriage too!
It’s easy to lose focus on eternal priorities and purpose. Revisit this conversation with your spouse frequently.
Changing your circumstances will not change your marriage. To improve your marriage, you have to lean into the conflict and learn to better serve your spouse.
We are deeply grateful for all of the amazing and beautiful people whom we have encountered in our Intimate Covenant journey — even those on the other side of the world. Thanks for sharing yourselves with us!
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share excerpts from several different live Q&A sessions recorded at previous live events.
- How do you differentiate between responsive sexual desire and a medical problem resulting in a lack of sex drive? - How can I keep striving for spiritual and emotional intimacy when my spouse is reluctant to do so? - How can I overcome shame in my physical appearance that hinders me from giving myself to and fully enjoying physical intimacy with my spouse? - Is it primarily a man’s responsibility to redeem a marriage? - Do you have suggestions to make the bedroom a special place for us?
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
We would love to see you blow up their social media and their donation site. Thank you for supporting the Moodys and for remembering them before our Father’s throne in your prayers.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer a listener's question about shifting roles roles in the pursuer/responder dynamic. But first, a few important announcements:
"Covenant Conversations" is the official name for the daily exercise formerly known as "Daily Check-in." Our thanks to Lamar Schrei for suggesting this!
Plan to join us for the 7th annual Marriage Retreat in Houston, TX — September 19-21. Registration opens on Valentine’s Day.
A shift in the roles of pursuers and responders is common in all relationships. Sometimes these role changes signal something detrimental to the relationship. Often they simply represent typical patterns of growth or seasonal shifts in the relationship.
In a healthy relationship, labeling who is the pursuer and who is the responder is far less important than making sure that there is frequent and healthy pursuit and response in all realms of intimacy.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to a listener’s question about struggling to recover from an infrequent and unhealthy sexual relationship.
Struggles with sex in a marriage must not be ignored. Intervention and difficult conversations can save YEARS of suffering and shame; even save the marriage itself.
The fundamental criteria for a wife to want more sex or different sex, is that the wife must have the expectation of sex worth having.
The conflict of sexual frequency and/or sexual variety requires an ongoing conversation and a commitment from each to have as much connecting sex as necessary to promote oneness in the relationship.
ALSO, please vote on social media or by email to rename our Daily Check-In Exercise. Here's the finalists:
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the accomplishments of 2023 and look forward to opportunities in 2024 for Intimate Covenant. We encourage you to do the same for your marriage with a State of the Covenant conversation.
For real progress in your marriage, it’s important to critically evaluate the past and to set goals for the future.
A thorough evaluation of your marriage should include assessment of each realm of intimacy: spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical.
Please help support Intimate Covenant by sharing and rating the podcast. We would be especially grateful for you to join us on Patreon.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn answer three listener questions about passionless sex:
"How can I stop thinking of sex as an obligation when it's physically painful? While we wait for physical healing, how can I enjoy this part of our marriage?”
“How do you navigate pleasing your spouse when you have no sexual desire and prefer not being touched at all?”
“How can I enjoy a particular sex act that I get a lot of pleasure from but they do not, but they are willing to do it because they love me.”
In summary,
Refuse to let sex become passionless and simply a place of obligation — for yourself or your spouse.
To help improve your own desire and passion, start by trying to focus on one simple thing that can anticipate and enjoy each time you make love.
Don’t settle for passionless sex with your spouse. Seek to compassionately understand your spouse’s challenges and seek only sex that is connecting and mutually pleasurable.
STATE OF THE COVENANT: It's almost a New Year and a great time to think about reassessing the state of your marriage and setting some goals together to improve the strength and intimacy of your relationship. Consider our resource to help get these important conversations started: The State of the Covenant
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss how to handle the inevitable emotional and sexual rejections in your marriage relationship.
Rejection almost always occurs due to multiple factors that have to do with how you are presenting the bid and with your spouse’s circumstances.
Angry outbursts or pouting will not get you what you want - rather, these kinds of reactions prove that you are unsafe, self-centered, and undesirable.
Instead, consider the perfect pursuer, Jesus. Even he gets rejected a majority of times. Follow his example and pursue relentlessly and selflessly.
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn are sharing several segments from Q&A sessions that didn't make it into a previous episode. But, these questions are too good to leave out, so we're excited to include them here!
Here’s what we’re covering:
How do I have sex when I’m disappointed in or upset with my spouse?
How can we handle infertility with faith and godliness?
Should we film ourselves having sex?
How can I overcome body shame that is hindering my sexual enjoyment and relationship?
How to have deeper emotionally connective conversations?
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family.
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Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn are pulling from submitted questions regarding the theme of female orgasms. Specifically, how can a husband help his wife orgasm? How can a wife learn to orgasm in different ways? And how important is a wife’s orgasm, anyway? Take-Aways:
Husbands often place far too much emphasis on their wives orgasm and miss the far more important goal of seeking connection during sex.
If a wife seeks to improve her ability to orgasm, a better understanding of her barriers is required. Seek to understand any possible places of sexual shame. Lean into the journey to explore your own body and sexuality.
Link to The Orgasm Course by Sheila Gregoire (https://sheilawraygregoire.com/product/orgasm-course-bundle)
This episode is sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family. ----------------------------------------------- Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant: Married Dance — https://marrieddance.com/?aff=29 (Shop from this link and part of your purchase will support Intimate Covenant. ) Coconu — http://www.coconu.com Coupon Code: intimateconvenant for 15% off your purchase The Adventure Challenge — https://www.theadventurechallenge.comUse coupon code: intimatecovenant for 10% off your purchase.
To send your comments, questions and suggestions, go to our website: www.intimatecovenant.com/podcast and click on the button: “Contact the Podcast” for an ANONYMOUS submission form. Or, send an email: podcast@intimatecovenant.com Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing! Cherishing, Matt & Jenn PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality. Join us at Patreon: www.patreon.com/intimatecovenant Consider a one-time gift: www.intimatecovenant.com/donate
www.intimatecovenant.comIntimate Covenant | Matt & Jenn Schmidt
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the hymen -- facts and fiction -- as well as other misconceptions about the concept of virginity.
There is no “virginity test.” The presence, absence, or any other physical appearance of a hymen is not a reliable indicator of a woman’s previous sexual activity. The same is true for vaginal bleeding or pain with initial sexual experience. Every women has a different experience.
“Virginity” does not determine someone’s worth as a person or as a future spouse.
While the ideal is that a person refrain from premarital sex, a person’s current sexual attitudes and behaviors are far more important than their past.
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In this episode, Matt & Jenn reminisce over some of the highlights of this year's annual Marriage Retreat and share a segment from the live Q&A session, including:
I'm too embarrassed to try new things. How do I get over my sexual shame?
Sex is Messy.
What's a reasonable sexual frequency for a male?
How to deal with a busy and distracted spouse?
Is sexual humor appropriate?
We also want to thank our sponsors for contributing to the success of this year's Retreat:
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss some of the challenges to great sex and the work required for the rewarding, lifelong journey of an intimate and fulfilling sexual relationship.
Believing that great sex just occurs spontaneously and effortlessly is actually preventing us from achieving good sex.
Great sex, like any other mastery, is the product of consistent, intentional work over time.
Take responsibility for your part in growing your sexual relationship. Then, commit yourself to learning, cultivating and expanding your sex towards greater oneness.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family.
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode Matt & Jenn share another live Q&A session - this time from a recent Marriage Day in Saint Louis. We respond to the following questions:
What are some examples of a kingdom-purpose for a marriage? What’s a good way to come up with a vision/purpose?
How to heal your sex life and trust after sexual immorality (eg porn, lust)
How do I move past my spouses past sexual experiences with others before our marriage?
Would you give an example of how to “reset” if we’ve become distant/feel alone/another reason?
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to an email from a bride-to-be regarding her concerns about first-time sexual intercourse. We also address concerns about sexual pain relevant to all married couples.
Pain with intercourse is not a rare circumstance and may occur for many reasons. The good news is that there are solutions for nearly every cause.
Some discomfort may occur for a new wife as her body becomes accustomed to the process of sexual intercourse.
The keys to reducing or preventing sexual pain are lubrication and to go slow enough to achieve maximum arousal.
If you experience pain during sex, stop immediately. Talk to your spouse about it and seek help from a health care provider.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family.
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share some clips from a recent live Q&A session at our Marriage Weekend in Seattle. We covered these questions: - Explain what you mean by “newness is required in the sexual relationship"? - How to increase romantic intimacy when life isn’t romantic? - How often should we schedule date night? - What are some ways we can be spontaneous with sex with kids in the house? - What are some ways a responder can prepare for intimacy later in the day? - Can the afterglow actually be a fore glow?
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the negative impacts of pornography use -- even if it occurred before you were married. We also address the unmarried about how to deal with the challenges of finding out that your potential spouse has a porn problem.
Pornography is a negative influence in society and may manifest terrible consequences even if a spouse used pornography before they were married.
Prior to getting married, this issue must be addressed in conversation and counseling. Don’t get married unless you are assured that your future spouse has dealt with past bondage to pornography.
Those of us with influence in the lives of singles, need to be a resource to help prepare them to avoid the dangers of pornography and be a resource to help young people deal with the potentially devastating consequences on their future marriages.
Previous episodes about the problems of pornography:
#113 - Q&A from 2022
#91 - Sex and spirituality
#62 - 2021 Retreat Q&A
#49 & #51 - Betrayed and Betrayer’s roles in healing
#11 - Dealing with Pornography in your marriage
The Intimate Covenant Podcast is sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family.
Please support these companies that support Intimate Covenant:
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Thanks for sharing, rating, reviewing and subscribing!
Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family. ------------------------------------------------
In this episode, Matt & Jenn share several segments from previous live Q&A sessions which we haven't included in an episode before. These leftovers won't be stale! Here's what we cover:
Do you have any specific tips to train yourself to stop defaulting to "logistic" conversations and encourage more emotionally connective conversations?
How can you differentiate between "withdrawal" and an actual medical lack of sex drive?
How can I overcome shame in my physical appearance that hinders me from fully giving myself to and and enjoying physical intimacy with my spouse?
What can I do to keep striving towards spiritual and emotional intimacy when my husband is not interested in implementing practical ways to do so?
What are the limits of appropriate conversations about sex and intimacy with other Christian friends?
What are some ways of connecting during the day with my spouse? Because of our jobs, we rarely ever wake up or go to bed at the same time.
Have you found that with pursuer/responder, couples can sometimes be both at different times?
When healing from sexual trauma within the relationship, would boundaries help or harm the healing process?
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family. -----------------------------------------------
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to listener feedback about the impacts of sexual shame on the marriage relationship.
sexual shame results in sexual relationships that are disconnected & withdrawn.
Sexual pursuers and responders tend to be impacted by sexual shame differently. Pursuers often bear unnecessary guilt for having sexual desire. Responders have learned to resist sexual thought or activity.
Intimate relationship is the ultimate antidote for shame. Co-create new meaning for sex with your Beloved.
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Cherishing, Matt & Jenn
PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family. -----------------------------------------------
In this episode, Matt & Jenn respond to two listener emails about one-sided sex and asking your spouse for orgasm.
The purpose of sexual desire is to point us toward intimate connection with God and with each other. When we fail to see the spiritual significance of sex, we miss the opportunity for fullness of pleasure and intimacy.
Present circumstances may limit how my sexual availability is manifested; but I must always offer the fulness of what I have to give — physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.
Conversations about sexual expectations can help avoid disappointment and resentment.
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.
Sponsored by: Open Door Financial Advisors -- www.opendoorfa.com Where finances meet faith and family.
----------------------------------------------- In this episode, Matt & Jenn discuss the biblical principles that should govern the use of sex toys in the holy marriage bed.
The Bible does not specifically address the use of sex toys in the marriage bed. But, even without a specific prohibition, careful consideration and wisdom are indicated.
Sex toys can be useful for couples to inject an occasional element of novelty and "spice" into their sexual routines.
Couples who suffer from sexual challenges or dysfunctions may use sex toys as an aid to help bring sexual pleasure and connection back into their relationship.
However, there is great danger for the relationship if a couple (or individual spouse) is using sex toys as a substitution for intimacy or a short-cut to avoid physical or emotional arousal.
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PS — If you have been blessed by the message of this podcast, we would deeply appreciate your support by donating to our mission of spreading God’s plan for intimate marriage and holy sexuality.