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So... We Are Not Doing It19 Mar 202400:13:54
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All 37 Songs In This Year's Eurovision Song Contest02 May 202302:08:08

cw: discussion of homophobia & transphobia (47m - 1h:1m)


And so, at long last, we reach that special point in the year when Mira takes over. They've listened to all of these songs multiple times before, and now it's their turn. With a top 37 in hand, we run through all of this years songs, pausing for anecdotes, observations or occasional rants. It's a marathon! It's the spectacular conclusion!


With special shout-outs to:

  • Mr Gerbear (@mr_gerbear on twitter) and their sorting tool at https://esc.gerbear.com/sorter2023.htm
  • dudepoints (@dudepoints on twitter) and their ESC blog at https://dudepoints.fun/


You can follow us on:

  • Twitter: @eurodivision
  • Tumblr: eurovisiondivision.tumblr.com

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To Be Fair to the Owl24 Mar 202300:55:34

We're not normally fans of pitting women against each other... but then again, this is a competition, so they know what they got themselves into. In the end, only one of these Queens can be crowned a Woman King. Who shall emerge victorious?


In this episode, we listen to:

🇳🇴 Alessandra Mele - Queen of Kings

🇪🇸 Blanca Paloma - Eaea

🇫🇷 La Zarra - Evidemment


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2018 - 12 | San Marino, or "S.V.I.P."18 Apr 201800:22:17
In which Jeroen tries to recount the events that took place in Bratislava a couple of weeks ago from memory, we flash back to the year 1969 for a short interlude and after listening to the song, Mira draws comparisons and fails geography.Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision! Write a review for the show on iTunes or let your friends know about the show!

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2018 - 11 | Latvia, or "Jokes All Around"18 Apr 201800:14:33
In which we struggle to find a good opening bit, and talk about more than one musical. It is neither the first time, nor will it be the last time, that we record the worst episode we've ever recorded, but unmitigated disasters cannot always be avoided.Follow us on Twitter (@eurodivision) and leave us a review on iTunes! Tell your friends about the show!

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2018 - 10 | Austria, or "I'd Like To See That"17 Apr 201800:16:44
In which we discuss the religious experience that is this song, but Jeroen also attempts to articulate a feeling of curious worry about the very same song.Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision! Leave a review on iTunes or tell your friends about the show! Thanks!

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2018 - 9 | Moldova, or "The Polyamorous Dream"16 Apr 201800:24:33
In which we discuss the greatest travel ad of this year's Eurovision line-up and the sexy, sexy direction that Moldova appears to be going in.I didn't want to say it but I thoroughly identify with Eugeniu Adrianov because I too am a skinny boy who wants to dance around with my girlfriend and a hot thick bearded boy.Follow us on Twitter @eurodivision! Leave a review on iTunes and share the show with your friends!

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2018 - 8 | Romania, or "Sick Burns"13 Apr 201800:15:16
In which we contemplate the nature of our cursed existence in relation to this trash fire of a podcast, but we ultimately receive some comforting words in the form of song lyrics.Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision! Rate us on iTunes and leave a review! Share the show with your friends! Thanks! GOODBYYYYYYYYYE.

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2018 - 7 | Ireland, or "Pesto Smugglers"13 Apr 201800:26:03
In which we discuss another anecdote from our recent trip, and spend about 15 minutes talking about airport security before realizing that that's not actually what this podcast is about.Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision!

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2018 - 6 | Estonia, or "Lost in Verona"12 Apr 201800:29:33
In which we provide you with another bizarre audio experience and try to figure out what Estonia's current fixation on Italian things is all about. Beyond that, we had a lengthy low-energy discussion that was even longer than what's in the episode, and was essentially just Jeroen name-dropping old Eurovision songs or Mira complaining more about glitter or stanning for real opera singers.Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision!

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2018 - 5 | France, or "Eurovision Is Not Political, part Two" [with special guest James]12 Apr 201800:26:10
In which we continue our discussion on the absolutely, completely, apolitical nature of the Eurovision Song Contest and discuss the different emotions evoked by specific anecdotes as opposed to broad anecdotes. Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision!

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2018 - 4 | Italy, or "Eurovision Is Not Political, part One" [with special guest James]11 Apr 201800:24:03
In which we have a special guest on to discuss the non-political nature of Eurovision Songs in this first part of our late-night discussion on two of this year's Big Five songs.Follow us on Twitter at @eurodivision.

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2018 - 3 | Netherlands, or "This Far-Western Type of Man"05 Apr 201800:25:05
In which we discuss the social commentary in HBO's hit television show Westworld and why it's probably just really embarrassing to be a dad. Despite rattling on for a disturbingly long amount of time, we forget to use the word "hater", which we really should have.

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Battle of the Bands, Part One: Citation Needed21 Mar 202301:04:46

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to our first ever Battle of the Bands. Grab your plastic cups full of beer from a tap that hasn't been cleaned in a while, and shove your way through the crowd to get right in front of the stage, cause we're presenting (and judging!) three bands today.


In this episode, we listen to:

🇮🇪 Wild Youth - We Are One

🇭🇷 Let 3 - Mama ŠČ!

🇸🇲 Piqued Jacks - Like An Animal


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2018 - 2 | Ukraine, or "Very Catchy Gibberish"04 Apr 201800:14:54
In which we discuss the merits of singing in "English" and we bounce around a couple of staging ideas that would greatly enhance Ukraine's chances at Eurovision this year.

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2018 - 1 | Portugal, or "The Garden is a Metaphor"03 Apr 201800:16:31
In which we kick things off in the traditional way (which is to say, by discussing the host country's entry), and we discuss universal metaphors and unorthodox hair colors.

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2018 - 0 | Expectations for 201802 Apr 201800:11:42
In which we briefly touch on last year's top 5 and discuss what that might mean for this year's line-up. Mira discusses her worries, and we struggle to remember how this show works.

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2017 - Episode 43 | Armenia08 May 201700:23:54
In which we discuss next year’s interval act, hashtags, and we revisit Mira’s favourite genre of music.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yw6LdDo7HxA

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2017 - Episode 42 | Ireland07 May 201700:18:55
In which we discuss, as was to be expected, Jedward. We also discuss the amount of invisible boybands that are around nowadays, and the bizarre mistake of snatching up a single member from an ensemble act.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dp3apBsLjvk

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2017 - Episode 41 | France07 May 201700:17:15
In which discuss the idea of turning your cultural identity into a theme park ride and what kind of pastries we'd like to enjoy with Alma.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Koi36aeRv7I

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2017 - Episode 40 | the Netherlands06 May 201700:22:38
In which we discuss English as written by non-native speakers, the position of backing vocalists, and the most appropriate moment for an audience to clap.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TxYU6iVpI5c

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2017 - Episode 39 | Azerbaijan06 May 201700:18:47
In which we discuss who really was the singer of Azerbaijan’s last Eurovision entry, kind-of misinterpret the lyrics of this songs, and things get spooky.As always, you can listen to the song and watch the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_UNpD0AvFc

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2017 - Episode 38 | Croatia05 May 201700:18:33
In which we struggle to recall the melody of Nina Kraljic’s “Lighthouse”, Mira gives up, and we build and burn down our love.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q06z-EaBvjE

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2017 - Episode 37 | Greece05 May 201700:20:30
In which we discuss olives, improper hashtag use and how to define a difficult concept like “love”.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_kLtgFPnbk

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Teeth Forward17 Mar 202301:00:41

In this episode, we listen to three songs: one we like, one we loathe, and one that makes us lose our minds... but which is which?! You're going to want to watch the music videos along with us, as there's a lot to unpack. Before all that, though, we talk about this year's themes - and the ones that didn't make the cut. Finally, we prove that we continue to be in our Alexander Rybak era.


In this episode, we listen to:

🇳🇱 Mia Nicola & Dion Cooper - Burning Daylight

🇮🇱 Noa Kirel - Unicorn

🇨🇾 Andrew Lambrou - Break a Broken Heart


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2017 - Episode 36 | Hungary04 May 201700:19:14
In which we discuss living life as a hater, this year’s Eurovision slogan, and some good reasons to sing in a language that’s not English.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o-7ETxsPiMY

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2017 - Episode 35 | Slovenia04 May 201700:18:42
In which we discuss a very bad episode of the very bad television show “Glee”, listen to Omar Naber’s first Eurovision entry “Stop”, and briefly talked about what happened in the twelve years since then.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=069n6EnlDt0

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2017 - Episode 34 | United Kingdom03 May 201700:29:34
In which we discuss that one time we went to see the Andrew Lloyd Webber musical “Cats”, our opinions about modern musical theatre, Disney movies, and some of the lessons the BBC should urgently learn.As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac5xNUfzCY4

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2017 - Episode 33 | Serbia03 May 201700:15:41
In which we discuss the curious similarity of this song to another popular pop song and take a closer look at some of the expectations set forward by masculinity in Western society. Western type of woman, western type of man.As always, you can watch the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMvqfykkMYU

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2017 - Episode 32 | Latvia03 May 201700:15:06
In which we discuss various drugs and the specific type of party this song would be well-received at.As always, you can find the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PFdSKiWyF_k

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2017 - Episode 31 | Romania02 May 201700:17:36
We discuss this year's incredible cultural exchange program between Switzerland and Romania, the eternal struggle between the juries and the televote, and the one missing element that would have pushed this song from incredible to legendary status.As always, you can listen to this song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lop3KkfRPA

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2017 - Episode 30 | Spain02 May 201700:21:31
In which we touch on the Spanish Eurodrama that occured earlier in the year. Additionally, we discuss the implication of the word "lover" and the pros and cons of goofy beach boys.As always, you can watch the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jO32_trJq4

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2017 - Episode 29 | Moldova01 May 201700:14:33
In which we use our best hangover brain to discuss the baking of cakes, our favourite memes and we wonder which year it is.As always, you can watch the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvaLAs9cex4

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2017 - Episode 28 | Cyprus28 Apr 201700:24:18
In which Mira starts the show off on a somewhat misanthropic note as a result of her day, but we do proceed to discuss capitalism, the lure of familiarity, and the truly exceptional MTV reality show “Are You The One?"As always, you can find the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxfQn7riJxo

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2017 - Episode 27 | San Marino25 Apr 201700:20:25
It's a Tuesday - which means we discuss another fabulous duet. Additionally, in this episode we talk about “Hope - Das Obama musical!”, the extended discography of Ralph Siegel, and staging concepts that could bring San Marino the victory this year.As always, we implore you to watch the full video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXiQr2ew3lQ

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Off To An Early Start14 Mar 202300:52:32

Join Mira and Jeroen as they once again take a deep dive into this year's Eurovision entries.


This Eurovision season began a long time ago, when these three countries went first and picked their song for the Eurovision Song Contest 2023 early. Mira has only just awoken from her winter sleep (she took a really long nap after Chérine lost Eurosong), so we decide to start at the very beginning... a very good place to start.


In this episode, we listen to:

🇧🇪 Gustaph - Because of You

🇺🇦 TVORCHI - Heart of Steel

🇦🇱 Albina & Familja Kelmendi - Duje



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2017 - Episode 26 | FYR Macedonia25 Apr 201700:23:30
In which we discuss what it feels like to suddenly be much older than you were yesterday, why we have a ladder in our apartment, how many people you need to have an official party, and other very important questions to consider in the year 2017.As always, you can find the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ddo8n_8pKrQ

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2017 - Episode 25 | Czech Republic24 Apr 201700:14:46
In which we do our best to discuss the music, but instead spend a lot of time ruminating about what it's like to be old, and we explore the general concept of "bad things".As always, you can listen to the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BoLWemuLP_g

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2017 - Episode 24 | Austria22 Apr 201700:20:03
In which we discuss the men you meet in the mountains, the things Mira did when she went to Austria that one time, and on top of that, we read from the dictionary.As always, you can find the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpPM1V3dqZE

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2017 - Episode 23 | Poland21 Apr 201700:20:48
In which we, and this is probably going to be the last time we do, profess our undying love for Michal Szpak. We discuss the poetic prowess of non-native speakers and things end up getting a little heated as we down one more glass of wine.As always, you can find the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmXlLBAu6IY

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2017 - Episode 22 | Montenegro19 Apr 201700:21:59
In which we record an episode in the morning right after waking up and boy, oh boy, we sure sound like we’re still asleep. Sorry.We go on a tangent about the queerness of Eurovision, its artists, its audiences, and most of all, ourselves. In addition to that, we do some reminiscing about Bosnia and Herzegovina’s 2004 entry.As always, you can find the full song on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWtqWD3TlaA

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2017 - Episode 21 | Belarus18 Apr 201700:15:15
In which we profess our undying love for Belarus, and we discuss forests, hairdos and two different films directed by James Cameron.As always, you can find the music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElqbLPcTHAI

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2017 - Episode 20 | Germany18 Apr 201700:16:40
In which we try to figure out what’s wrong with Germany at Eurovision these last few years, but end up discussing various motivational quotes which you could put on your Facebook wall.As always, you can find the full video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpESkcTVdkk

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2017 - Episode 19 | Lithuania17 Apr 201700:20:14
In which we discuss the Academy Award Nominated film “Daens”, and Jeroen is moved to tears as Mira continues the somewhat worrying annual trend of upsetting the Eurovision fandom.As always, please watch the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o7ph8As8azg

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2017 - Episode 18 | Bulgaria16 Apr 201700:24:50
In which we go through a lengthy existential crisis, discuss various properties aimed at young adults, talk about our memories of being a teenager, and almost forget to actually talk about the song we came here to talk about.As always, you can watch the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTFuXOEbJTY

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2017 - Episode 17 | Portugal15 Apr 201700:22:12
In which we communicate with our Portuguese correspondent via text, and we discuss a long list of subjects including but not limited to: Swedish beef, authorship and Daniel Johnston.As always, you may find the official music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymFVfzu-2mw

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Finale: Standouts and Skips10 May 202200:34:00

We're back for a final check-in before this year's Eurovision shows!


Rather than making a full Top 40-ranking, we go through our thoughts on this year's Eurovision Songs, shining a spotlight on some of Mira's favourite tunes as well as the ones that don't strike her fancy.


Follow us on Twitter: @eurodivision

Check out the bonus episode: https://ko-fi.com/eurovisiondivision


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2017 - Episode 16 | Iceland12 Apr 201700:19:13
In which we wrap up our Nordic expedition and discuss the Icelandic representative for Eurovision 2017. We talk about Royksopp, Robyn, Flight of the Conchords, the maximum stretchiness of metaphors and words that are good to shout at the top of your lungs. Mira and Jeroen have their first disagreement, ever, of all time.As always, you can find the official music video on the Eurovision Song Contest YouTube Channel.

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2017 - Episode 15 | Finland11 Apr 201700:15:42
We discuss birds, aliens, murder, birds, murder, the dark and birds.

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2017 - Episode 14 | Norway11 Apr 201700:21:12
In which we discuss changing your mind, the unique experience of working at a clothing store and the definition of a musical instrument. What else is there to say about JOWST? What else isn't there to say about JOWST? Who is JOWST, really? Who isn't JOWST? Aren't we all JOWST, a little bit, if we truly look into our hearts?As always, you can find the full music video on the official Eurovision Song Contest YouTube channel.

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