Doing Divorce Different with Lesa Koski – Détails, épisodes et analyse

Divorce mistakes, divorce recovery, women over 40, divorce support, life after divorce, divorce coaching, and emotional healing. In this episode of Doing Divorce Different, Lesa Koski shares the seven most common divorce mistakes she sees women make—and how to avoid them.

If you're navigating divorce, feeling overwhelmed, worried about finances, struggling with parenting decisions, or wondering how you'll rebuild your life, this episode is for you. Lesa draws from years of experience as a divorce mediator and coach to help women avoid costly mistakes while holding onto hope for the future.

You'll learn how to make better decisions during divorce, overcome fear around finances, protect your children from emotional fallout, build a support system, care for your physical and emotional health, and most importantly, keep hope alive during one of life's hardest transitions.

Divorce recovery is not about being perfect. It's about taking the next right step. Whether you're considering divorce, currently going through it, or rebuilding afterward, this episode will help you move forward with more confidence and clarity.

TIMESTAMPS:

(00:00) Introduction to the most common divorce mistakes

(03:10) Making decisions based on emotion instead of information

(08:45) Overcoming fear about finances during divorce

(15:12) Why the court won't provide emotional justice

(21:35) Protecting children during divorce

(28:05) The danger of refusing help and support

(34:18) Why taking care of your body matters during divorce

(42:40) Holding onto hope when life feels uncertain

(49:10) Final encouragement and next steps

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Slow down and gather information before making major financial or legal decisions.

• Learning about your finances can reduce fear and build confidence.

• Children should never be used as messengers, therapists, or allies during divorce.

• Healing happens faster when you ask for help and build community.

• Hope is believing something good can still come from something hard.

HOST BIO:

Lesa Koski is a divorce mediator, coach, attorney, and host of Doing Divorce Different. She helps women over 40 navigate divorce with greater confidence, clarity, and hope through mediation, coaching, courses, and community. Her mission is to help women understand that midlife is not their crisis—it's their comeback.

RESOURCE LINKS:

Free Divorce Roadmap:

www.lesakoski.com

Divorce Comeback Community:

www.lesakoski.com

Connect with Lesa:

www.lesakoski.com

TAGS/KEYWORDS:

divorce mistakes, divorce recovery, women over 40, divorce support, divorce coach, divorce mediator, life after divorce, emotional healing, financial confidence after divorce, co-parenting, child custody, divorce advice for women, midlife women, rebuilding after divorce, hope after divorce, divorce comeback, divorce roadmap, women and divorce, personal growth after divorce

Divorce recovery, women's health after divorce, stress management, midlife wellness, strength training for women, emotional healing and divorce. In this episode of Doing Divorce Different, Lesa Koski shares how getting physically strong can help you become emotionally resilient during divorce and other difficult life transitions.

When life feels overwhelming, many women focus on the legal and emotional aspects of divorce recovery while overlooking how stress impacts the body. Lesa opens up about her own experiences with divorce, adoption, breast cancer, anxiety, and learning how surrendering control changed everything.

You'll discover practical ways to reduce stress, increase energy, build confidence, and strengthen your body during difficult seasons. From protein and fiber to walking, weightlifting, community, faith, and self-compassion, this episode offers simple strategies that can help support your divorce recovery and overall well-being.

If you're navigating divorce recovery, heartbreak, grief, reinvention, or any season that feels heavy, this conversation will remind you that healing happens one small step at a time.

Remember: Midlife is not your crisis. It's your comeback.

TIMESTAMPS:

(00:00) Why stress impacts your body during divorce

(03:15) Lessons learned from breast cancer, surrender, and healing

(06:40) The connection between emotional health and physical strength

(09:05) Why walking can calm anxiety and regulate emotions

(11:22) Building strength instead of chasing skinny

(13:18) Protein, fiber, and simple nutrition changes that matter

(16:20) The power of a 10-minute walk after meals

(18:15) Why weightlifting is essential for women over 40

(21:08) Finding community and fun during difficult seasons

(23:55) How exercise helped during cancer treatment

(27:12) Learning to laugh at yourself: Lesa's YMCA story

(32:20) Keeping promises to yourself builds confidence

(35:15) Small steps that create lasting transformation

(38:45) Midlife is not your crisis—it's your comeback

(40:10) Free Divorce Roadmap and Divorce Comeback Community

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Physical strength supports emotional healing during divorce and life transitions.

• Small habits like walking after meals and increasing protein can significantly improve energy and mood.

• Weightlifting helps women maintain muscle, bone health, confidence, and resilience after 40.

• Healing often begins by keeping small promises to yourself consistently.

• Community, faith, laughter, and movement are powerful tools for navigating hard seasons.

HOST BIO:

Lesa Koski is a divorce mediator, divorce coach, attorney, podcast host, and founder of Doing Divorce Different. She helps women over 40 navigate divorce with more clarity, confidence, and hope through mediation, coaching, courses, and community. Lesa's mission is to help women understand that midlife is not their crisis—it's their comeback.

RESOURCE LINKS:

Free Divorce Roadmap:

https://lesakoski.com

Divorce Comeback Community:

https://lesakoski.com

Connect with Lesa:

https://lesakoski.com

Podcast:

Doing Divorce Different

TAGS/KEYWORDS:

divorce recovery, divorce support for women, women over 40, divorce healing, emotional healing, stress management, strength training for women, protein for women over 40, midlife wellness, divorce coach, divorce mediation, anxiety recovery, breast cancer survivor, women's health, personal growth, faith and healing, resilience after divorce, life after divorce, self-care during divorce, menopause fitness

Grief after divorce and loss is real. Learn how to rebuild your life with spiritual resilience, process grief, and move forward after major life transitions.

In this powerful conversation, Lesa Koski sits down with spiritual resilience coach Carrie Hopkins to explore grief beyond death—including divorce, life transitions, and identity shifts. If you’re navigating grief after divorce or loss, this episode will help you understand how to process emotions, create a safe space for healing, and begin rebuilding your life.

Together, they unpack the early stages of grief, why avoiding emotions can make things harder, and how spiritual resilience allows you to move forward—not move on—with strength and clarity.

Timestamps:

(00:00) Introduction to grief beyond death

(02:15) Carrie’s story: loss, divorce, and becoming a grief coach

(05:40) Understanding grief in life transitions

(08:30) Grief after divorce vs grief after death

(11:10) Why we avoid emotions and what happens when we do

(14:25) Step 1: Creating a safe space to feel your emotions

(18:10) Naming emotions and why it matters

(21:05) Step 2: Radical self-care during grief

(24:30) Why neglecting yourself makes grief harder

(27:15) Step 3: Making peace with the past

(31:20) Letting go of judgment and limiting beliefs

(35:10) The danger of idealizing relationships after loss

(39:00) Moving forward vs “moving on”

(42:00) How to begin rebuilding your life

Key Takeaways:

Grief is not just about death—it includes divorce, identity shifts, and life transitions

Avoiding emotions can intensify grief and lead to emotional or physical consequences

Creating a safe space to feel and express emotions is the first step toward healing

Radical self-care is essential to build capacity during difficult seasons

Healing comes from making peace with the past—not staying stuck in it

Guest Bio:

Carrie Hopkins is a spiritual resilience coach and founder of Life’s Next Chapter Coaching. She specializes in helping individuals rebuild their lives after loss, including divorce, bereavement, and major life transitions. Through her Rebuilding Your Life After Loss program, Carrie guides clients to reconnect with their inner strength and create a life they love after grief.

Resource Links:

Carrie Hopkins Coaching: Life’s Next Chapter Coaching

Rebuilding Your Life After Loss Program

Contact: Carrie@LifesNextChapterCoaching.com

Lesa Koski Mediation & Coaching: Lesakoski.com

Tags/Keywords:

grief after divorce, grief after loss, spiritual resilience, divorce healing, life after divorce, rebuilding after loss, emotional healing, grief coaching, midlife transitions, women over 40, divorce recovery, loss and healing

A New Journey: From Doing Divorce Different to Saddle Up Live

Lesa Koski, a family law attorney turned mediator and host of Doing Divorce Different, shares news of ending the podcast to embark on a new project, 'Saddle Up Live,' influenced by her recent breast cancer diagnosis with a 98% positive outcome. She expresses gratitude for early detection, discusses the impact of the diagnosis on her life, including the emotional journey. Lesa reflects on the support from her faith, the learning experience from hosting her podcast, and her excitement for the new direction with Saddle Up Live. She mentions her desire to continue helping people, especially women, through their challenges and encourages listeners to embrace every moment with strength and resilience. The announcement includes details about her divorce mediation resources still being available and ends with an expression of gratitude for her listeners and the encouragement to stay positive and tuned in for her next venture.

00:00 Welcome and a Big Announcement

01:01 Sharing Personal News: A Journey of Health and Faith

03:52 Introducing Saddle Up Live: A New Beginning

05:56 Reflections on Doing Divorce Different and Future Plans

12:07 Empowerment Through Divorce and Beyond

14:02 Gratitude and Looking Forward

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Across all the mediation meetings I have had, there seem to be seven common dilemmas that come up. I have teamed up with my coach, Tracy Pleschourt, to put together a half-day workshop to empower women to suffer less while going through divorce. During this episode, Tracy and I give a sneak peak into the seven dilemmas, and what we will cover regarding each one during the workshop. If you are local to the Minnesota area and looking for support, tune in to hear about this wonderful opportunity to not only work through common roadblocks, but also meet other incredible women who are on the same journey as you. 

In this episode:

• [3:58] What is one of the top stories that Lesa’s clients face?
• [7:28] Lesa discusses working through parenting concerns.
• [9:44] Lesa shares about emotional impact and how it can impact your divorce journey.
• [12:09] How can people handle the social stigma or the judgment around divorce?
• [14:10] Lesa talks about how she will give legal information in the upcoming workshop. 
• [15:08] A huge dilemma that comes up is loneliness in divorce, how do you manage it? 
• [18:52] Tracy describes her program, Self Made U.

Key Takeaways: 

• [10:18] When you leave your feelings in the dark, you can’t heal. Acknowledging those feelings and bringing them to the light is the first step to being able to heal and find clarity and opportunities for what you are experiencing.
• [11:00] When you are operating from your prodigy brain, you are more likely to be able to look through the lens or find the perspective around gifts and opportunities. 
• [17:00] Join Lesa and Tracy’s master class on April 25th from 9am-1pm in Minnesota to learn how to navigate the 7 most common dilemmas that Lesa has seen while being a divorce mediator. Learn strategies from both Lesa’s experience and Tracy’s coaching so you can better navigate the circumstances you are going through. 

Quotes: 

[10:13] “Teaching the people at the workshop how to really feel them (feelings), because coach Tracy, you taught me that anything in the dark can’t heal. So when we try to fight those feelings or pretend we don’t have them or ignore them, they’re in the dark when we go “hello there fear, or anxiety, or whatever you are,” it comes to the light and that’s the first step in being able to heal.” - Lesa Koski

[12:52] “I think when you find yourself swimming in judgment, you have to decide to prioritize your well-being over societal opinions and stigma. You have to challenge the stigma by refusing to internalize those judgements. You have to be able to separate the fact from the fiction of how society views divorce, like leveraging empathy for yourself.” - Tracy Pleschourt

[15:42] “If loneliness is getting in the way of you being able to get through your day, then therapy is definitely the path that you want to pursue. If it’s just something that you’re starting to recognize, but you’re still able to get through your day, you’re still able to manage your day, then coaching is probably the right path for you to take.” - Tracy Pleschourt 

Guest Bio: 

Tracy Pleschourt, the Founder of Self-Made U helps men and women create Self-Made wealth and wellness through life coaching. Tracy has mastered and now teaches the critical skills necessary to manage your mind and overcome any obstacle, including overeating, over drinking, time management, career & relationship changes.

Just a few years ago, Tracy was a successful, advertising executive. Stifled by the rigorous, time-consuming demands of the corporate world, she traded in her 20 years of advertising to pursue her real passion: life & weight loss coaching.

Tracy is a student of her own work and has stopped overeating, overdrinking, and created a multi six figure business while mastering metabolic health.  Today, Tracy coaches people all across the country who want to do the same.

Tracy dedicates her work to ambitious, life-long learners yearning for answers and seeking a better way to create the results they desire and deserve. She instills confidence and a call to action that leads to unlimited wealth and wellness. 

Resources: 

Divorce Decoded Workshop

Tracy Pleschourt Instagram

Tracy Pleschourt Website

Tracy Pleschourt Facebook

Tracy Pleschourt LinkedIn

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

To receive real-time alerts that your child is safe, visit https://www.soberlink.com/partners/different

I am so honored to introduce my FREE Co-Parenting Masterclass. This masterclass shares tools to co-parent well even with a difficult co-parent. You will learn the 5 C's of a Co-Parenting Plan and a free bonus resource with Certified Divorce Lending Specialist, Tami Wollensak, sharing what you want to consider regarding the family home. Sign up to receive a video replay at https://www.lesakoski.com/co-parenting-masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

This episode of 'Doing Divorce Different' features a continuation of a discussion with coach Tracy about the transformative power of a specific planner available on Amazon. The conversation delves into the planner's structure, emphasizing the 'S E L F' acronym to guide daily introspection and intention-setting. Highlighting the necessity of confronting self-saboteur behaviors and leveraging personal strengths, this segment also introduces a free saboteur assessment available at selfmadeu.com. Beyond personal organization, the planner serves as a tool for self-discovery and empowerment, proving beneficial in various life scenarios including personal growth, business, and navigating divorce. The episode concludes with invitations to explore further resources for divorce support and personal empowerment.

00:00 Introduction to the Show

00:21 The Saddle Up Segment with Coach Tracy

00:30 The Power of a Planner

01:20 Understanding the SELF Method

02:13 Exploring the 'E' in SELF

03:14 Identifying Saboteur Narratives

14:49 Leveraging Your Strengths

19:17 Finishing with a Decision

21:22 Closing Remarks and Resources

Find the Planner Here!

Connect with Lesa!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Hacking Happiness through Divorce with Penny Lacaso

In this episode of we welcome Penny Lacaso from Melbourne, Australia, to discuss how individuals facing or going through divorce can find happiness and empowerment. Penny, a happiness hacker and author of 'Hacking Happiness,' shares her personal journey, including her childhood experience with her parents' divorce and her own divorce after a long-term marriage. She emphasizes the significance of defining happiness on one's own terms and provides techniques for cultivating joy and self-compassion during challenging times like divorce. The conversation covers the importance of allowing oneself to feel a range of emotions, the power of small acts of kindness, and practical exercises to foster happiness, including the 'Three Good Things' practice recommended by positive psychology. Penny and Lesa also discuss the value of self-compassion and using challenging life events as opportunities for growth and self-discovery.

00:00 Introduction to the Show and Guest

01:45 Getting to Know Penny Lacaso

03:29 Penny's Personal Journey and the Concept of Happiness

06:55 Understanding Self and Discovering Personal Happiness

08:51 The Power of Self-Compassion and Overcoming Judgement

11:49 The Role of Choice in Happiness and Dealing with Negative Emotions

15:51 Practical Tips for Finding Joy and Happiness

31:14 Final Thoughts and Contact Information

32:18 Show Closing

Bio: Penny Lacaso is the first hapiness hacker on a quest to teach 10 million humans by 2025, how to flourish in life!

Find Penny here!

Facebook

Instagram

Linkedin

Resources!

Lesa Koski Website

Lesa’s Online Courses

Lesa’s Masterclass

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

In this episode of Doing Divorce Different Lesa Koski invites her favorite coach, Tracy, to talk about self-empowerment and self-coaching. They discuss the benefits of asking yourself the right questions for personal growth, tools for assessing individual feelings, and learning how to show up in situations. Their focus lies in maximizing life and recognizing the value in every experience. Tracy's book is highlighted, a day planner offering tools and daily self-coaching questions for self-improvement. Their conversation also dives deep into the importance of creating self-reliance, self-confidence, and self-trust, all through the way of practicing self-coaching daily.

00:01 Introduction and Welcome

00:25 Reintroducing the Favorite Coach

00:36 The Impact of Tracy's Tips

01:04 Introduction to the Self-Made Day Planner

01:30 How to Purchase and Use the Planner

01:52 Tracy's Input on the Planner

02:33 The Planner as a Self-Coaching Tool

05:21 The Importance of Self-Reflection

05:46 The Impact of the Planner on Daily Life

06:14 The Science of Learning and Self-Reflection

08:15 The Planner as a Tool for Self-Awareness

08:45 The Planner's Structure and Methodology

09:20 The Planner's Impact on Positive Thinking

11:49 The Planner's Role in Eliminating Self-Sabotage

17:42 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Buy your planner here!

Learn about our Workshop!

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

Doing Divorce Different: A Candid Conversation with Laila Aitken

In this episode of 'Doing Divorce Different', host Lesa Koski, a family law attorney turned mediator, engages in a conversational interview with guest Laila Aitken Ali, a divorce coach and founder of Split FYI. They discuss overcoming the fear and emotional challenges of divorce, the importance of self-empowerment and self-care, and ways to effectively compartmentalize problems during difficult times. Laila shares her personal journey of divorce and how it led her to mentor and help others going through similar experiences. She emphasizes on viewing divorce as a journey of self-discovery and clarity, and offers advice on maintaining a positive mindset and seeking support through community-based resources like Split FYI.

00:01 Introduction and Welcome

00:25 Meet the Guest: Laila Aitken Ali

01:57 The Journey to Becoming a Divorce Coach

02:46 The Impact of Divorce on Self-Trust

03:46 The Role of a Divorce Coach

04:20 The Importance of Self-Care During Divorce

05:40 The Power of Mindset in Navigating Divorce

06:12 Steps to Alleviate Overwhelm During Divorce

07:17 The Power of Compartmentalizing During Divorce

09:51 The Importance of Self-Talk and Embracing Feelings

12:09 The Power of Positive Mindset and Self-Acknowledgement

22:04 The Role of a Love Book in Nurturing Self-Love

26:40 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Bio. Struck by her own 10-year-long experience with divorce, Laila was exhausted and thrown by the complexities and lack of consolidated information to help her close that chapter. She longed for a safe place to access emotional and organizational help, with professionals, resources, tools, and a warm community of those who already understand the situation. Over time, this sparked Laila to create Split.fyi to propel more people in her situation forward. Laila focuses on being a positive thinking partner to help educate and support others to create their own personal roadmap, navigate the tides, and reclaim their confidence and inner balance.

Laila is a mom, accredited mediator, certified CDC Certified Divorce Coach® and in the Better Apart Method, a global citizen, and hopes to inspire everyone to take agency over their lives by educating and supporting as many people as she can to rest, reclaim and rebirth before, during and after divorce, breakup or a major transition in their life.

For Divorce Support go to Lesakoski.com

Find Laila: https://splitfyi.com/about-us/

https://www.instagram.com/splitfyi/?hl=en

https://www.facebook.com/groups/splitfyi

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast

In this episode of 'Doing Divorce Different', host Lesa Koski shares insights from her recent conversation with Jennifer Lee on how to manage finances amidst life transitions such as divorce. Lisa emphasizes the importance of understanding what really matters when it comes to spending and saving. Jennifer Lee provided important tools and posed thought-provoking scenarios to help listeners identify what they truly value and what they desire to achieve financially. This episode aims to alleviate anxieties surrounding financial issues and encourage listeners to envision their lives beyond monetary constraints.

00:01 Introduction to the Show

00:38 A Candid Conversation with Jennifer Lee

00:51 Understanding Your Finances

01:52 The Lottery Scenario

02:40 Three Deep Questions to Understand Your Values

04:27 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Mentioned in this episode:

Saddle Up Live Podcast Ad

Do you love Doing Divorce Different and want to hear more from Lesa Koski and her amazing guests? Tune in to the Saddle Up Live Podcast, a transformative podcast tailored for women aged 40 and beyond, where courage, God's grace, and a touch of sass are the driving forces behind conquering life's challenges. Whether you're looking for practical advice, heartfelt stories, or simply a supportive community of like-minded women, saddle up and join us on this exhilarating ride.

Saddle Up Live Podcast