Dem Black Mamas Podcast – Détails, épisodes et analyse

Dear Mama, 

What if I told you much of the growth our children may need to show up in the ways we’re nurturing them to show up comes through falling in love? When we tell our children not to focus on love, are we parenting out of fear?  What message does that send to our children about the priority to place on intimate relationships, and what generational impact does that have on our culture?  How do we raise children who know how to love?

In this raw and reflective episode, we take a deep dive into the Netflix series 'Forever,' using it as a powerful springboard to unpack the complexities of Black motherhood, teenage love, and generational parenting.  We’re talking parenting fears, the tightrope between nurturing and protecting our babies, and the real-life challenges that come with raising Black teens in a world that doesn’t always love them back. Y'all know us! So honest storytelling, aha moments, and of course, plenty of laughter and love.

We also get into:
✨The roots of catastrophic parenting styles and the fear of raising fuck boys
✨How generational trauma shows up at the dinner table (and in the group chat)
✨Teaching our children vulnerability & letting go
✨Why was Keisha’s Daddy so triggering

PLUS - Crystal gives a s/o to Mara Brock Akil for putting text on the screen, NeKisha questions Crystal is good at training real dogs or Ques, and Thea offers advice on how to live like we'll survive this moment in time.  In our Black Mama Say segment for this episode, where we put our twist on sayings from Black mamas, and the saying we're twisting this episode is “Let Me Hush Though.”

EPISODE PAUSE FOR THE CAUSE:

"Imma keep it 100.  I don't raise f*c? boys.  I don't wanna raise men who women have to manage." - Crystal Tennille Irby

IMPORTANT CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS:

JOIN US for Talk Back: Black Keisha, Black Mamas & Forever - We'll be watching & discussing the scenes that made you TALK BACK to the screen. REGISTER NOW!

💗Black Mama Magic Card Deck: Card #15 “Fuck Fear. An Affirmation.” 💗

EPISODES MENTIONS/RELEVANT TO THIS EPISODE:

🎙️DBM Ep 51 When It All Falls Down, Finding Freedom & Transitioning to Conscious Parenting w/ Domari Dickinson

DBM Ep 71 Companion Playlist 

🔗 Connect with Dem Black Mamas:

Join Our Email List | Instagram | YouTube

🗣️Engage: This is a conversation.  Speak back to us!  Please share your thoughts about the episode using the hashtag #DemBlackMamas, DM us, or email us at magic@demblackmamas.com.

To expand knowledge and combat misinformation and disinformation, we create a syllabus (s/o to Melissa Harris Perry), a list of references/sources for our listeners to dive into.  This list includes any books, videos, podcasts, etc. that we've mentioned in the episode or that will help you gain a well-informed perspective. For our complete syllabus, check out our website: demblackmamas.com

Dear Mama, What if I told you the saying,  “real gs move in silence is killing your dream?  What if I told you to tell everyone and anyone you know what you want to do?  What if I told you your notes app and Evernote are the keys to the manifestation of your dreams?  What if I told you every time we tell our stories, we reclaim what was stolen? Every time we create, we declare: We are still here.  These are our takeaways from our conversation with prolific children’s book author, Alliah Agostini, who wrote The Juneteenth Story: Celebrating the End of Slavery in the United States & one of my favorite children’s books, Great Idea Malia.  

In this episode, we explore the intersections of Black motherhood, creativity, community, and freedom. Alliah provides invaluable insights for other Black mama creatives, encouraging them to trust their journey and to navigate the world of storytelling with authenticity and courage. Her experience is a testament to the power of community and culture as a treasure trove of inspiration. 

We get real about:
✨Complexities of Black culture
✨The importance of always telling our stories, but especially right now
✨Handling critique and nurturing creativity 
✨Building community and managing ideas

PLUS - If you’re looking for some hope right now. We got you.  In our Black Mama Say segment, where we put our own twist on sayings from Black Mamas, we talk about what’s giving us hope while this country is on fire. 

ABOUT ALLIAH AGOSTINI

Buffalo, NY native Alliah L. Agostini has marketed everything from iconic brands to scrappy start-ups, but motherhood helped her return to her first love: children's literature. She writes to spread joy, truth, and to help more children see themselves reflected on the page.  Alliah is the author of 10 books for children including Junior Library Guild Selection BIG TUNE: Rise of the Dancehall Prince (starred reviews, Kirkus and Publisher's Weekly, NYPL and Chicago Public Library Best Picture Book of 2023), Black KidLit Award-winning The Juneteenth Story: Celebrating the End of Slavery in the United States, Great Idea Malia, and recently released Scarecited on the First Day of School.  She and her work have been featured on Oprah Daily, Essence.com, TODAY with Hoda + Jenna, Morning in America, Good Housekeeping, CNN, and NPR.

Connect with Alliah: Instagram | Website

IMPORTANT CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Collection Plate Cause: Learn more about & donate to Creators Well, a nonprofit founded by Crystal for Black girls living in South Carolina intersted in writing and performance. 

💗Black Mama Magic Card Deck: Card #19 “I Honor My Child's Divine Path” 💗

Episode Playlist:  Black Mama Creatives Episode Playlist

🔗 Connect with Dem Black Mamas:

Instagram | YouTube | Email List

🗣️Engage: This is a conversation.  Speak back to us!  Please share your thoughts about the episode using the hashtag #DemBlackMamas, DM us, or email us at magic@demblackmamas.com.

To expand knowledge and combat misinformation and disinformation, we create a syllabus (s/o to Melissa Harris Perry), a list of references/sources for our listeners to dive into.  This list includes any books, videos, podcasts, etc. that we've mentioned in the episode or that will help you gain a well-informed perspective. For our complete syllabus, check out our website: demblackmamas.com

Dear Mama,

What if I told you I didn’t think I had the words for the intro of this episode because we recorded it before the election, and after November 5th, joy was THE LAST THING I wanted to talk about?  I wish I could say thinking of our ancestors pulled me through, but the truth is reaching forward in time helped me more than reaching back, and now more than ever, we are going to need joy not to feel happy but because, as Thea Monyee, one of the cohost of this podcast, who will be guiding us through the Joy Assessment, says "Joy makes things clear," and we, particularly Black mothers, need to get REAL CLEAR RIGHT NOW and being committed to joy, being centered on joy requires us to tell the truth to ourselves, about our relationships, about what is real and what is not, what is serving us and most importantly how we are not serving ourselves and that allows us to get really, really clear about what we are supposed to be doing, how to mind our business and what business we should be minding, and focused on in the time that we are about to enter.

In this episode we delve into the social-political barriers of joy and how accountability intersects with the pursuit of personal joy. Thea Monyee introduces the groundbreaking "Joy Assessment," created with the Blacker The Brain cohort, as a tool for Black folx to reclaim joy as a means for liberation.

In this episode, we talk:

✨The groundbreaking Joy Assessment

✨The difference between joy and happiness

✨Radical honesty and spiritual bypassing

✨Joy as tool of parenting from a place of liberation and not fear

💗Black Mama Magic Card: Card #10 - Lay Your Burdens on the Altar of Love💗

Episode Playlist: Blackest Holiday Playlist Eva curated by us on Spotify

EPISODES MENTIONS/RELEVANT TO THIS EPISODE:

🎙️DBM Ep 59: Black Motherhood, Myths & Matrescence w/ Stepha LaFond

✨PATREON BONUS CONTENT - Pre-Show Shenanigans✨

ABOUT THE BLACKER THE BRAIN:

Thea Monyee aka the Secretary of Joy and the founder of The Blacker the Brain which is an ongoing campaign, conversation and cohort created to make mental health inclusive and expansive for Black bodies by teaching practitioners to unlearn harmful ideas, practices, and policies, and empowering potential clients with language, a full understanding of their rights, and a joy centered framework for their healing within in an oppressive society. 

Connect with The Blacker The Brain: Instagram | Website

Take the Joy Assessment

🔗 Connect with Dem Black Mamas

Instagram
Patreon
YouTube

🗣️Engage: This is a conversation.  Speak back to us!  Share your thoughts about the episode using the hashtag #DemBlackMamas, DM us or email us at magic@demblackmamas.com.

For full show notes & transcript, check out our website:  demblackmamas.com

Dear Mama,

There’s no deep intro for this episode.  In this episode, we talk:

✨Which version of "All Cried Out" is best, Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam or Allure & 112

✨Election 2024

✨How God blessed us with Morris Chesnut's rise from Ricky to Cory Cash

WE HAVE RANGE! The way we move from levity to depth, Thea breaking down Joe Biden's scorpio tendencies to NeKisha connecting COVID to Zoom organizing to Crystal invoking Stokely Carimicheal’s definition of a revolutionary, is DEFINITELY a reflection of the times we are living in.

And the truth is we were with more questions than answers:

👉🏾What does it mean to burn it all down, and who will be the ashes? 
👉🏾What does it mean to be an activist? 
👉🏾No matter the election outcome, what are we committed to building?

What we know for sure, though, is MORRIS CHESNUT continues to bless us, and we are GRATEFUL!

& OF COURSE we got that #BlackMamaMagic #ElectionPlaylist

💗Black Mama Magic Card for this episode: Card #48 - Time Is Always Divine💗

EPISODES MENTIONS/RELEVANT TO THIS EPISODE:

🎙️DBM Ep 1: Meet The Mamas

🎙️DBM Ep 2: Michelle 4C LaVaughn Chocolate Robinson

🎙️ DBM Ep 18: Deez Black Votes

🎙️DBM Ep 36: Election Shift - DBM + Shaping The Shift Mashup

🎙️DBM Ep 52: Black Women Organizing Hoes That Ain't Loyal Spiritual Political Cycles

✨MERCH OF THE MONTH - Black Mama Magic Card Deck ✨

If you really wanna watch us on our Blackest behavior, get on The Mothership & come inside the Black Mama Magic Room aka our YouTube Channel.

🔗 Connect with Dem Black Mamas

• Instagram
• YouTube

🗣️Engage: This is a conversation.  Share your thoughts about the episode using the hashtag #DemBlackMamas, DM us or email us at magic@demblackmamas.com.

For full show notes & transcript, check out our website:  demblackmamas.com

Dear Mama,

What if I told you there’s no such thing as snapping back after giving birth, only expanding into?  What if I asked you to imagine Black motherhood without suffering?  Could you do it?  Have we made suffering a rite of passage in Black motherhood? Have we shrouded Black motherhood in self-sacrifice as opposed to sacred sacrifice?  These are the questions we explore in this episode about matrescence. 

Coined by reproductive psychologist Dana Raphael, matrescence is the process of becoming a mother, including the physical, psychological, and emotional changes that occur during pregnancy, birth, and the postnatal period. 

Lissen yall, this episode drove us Thea to drink!  So we’re glad to have one of our favs Stepha Lafond of Unlearning Motherhood, ridin’ shotgun with us who provides context to all the things we know and feel about transitioning to and in motherhood but didn’t have the language for.

✨Much like adolescence, matrescence involves ongoing shifts that shape our identity and understanding of ourselves.

✨How self-forgiveness sets the tone for your motherhood journey

✨Why setting the strong Black women free is essential for us and our children

✨Normalizing not doing motherhood alone

💗Black Mama Magic Card for this episode: Card # 39 - My Children Are My Teachers💗

EPISODES MENTIONS/RELEVANT TO THIS EPISODE:

🎙️DBM Episode 51: When It All Falls Down, Finding Freedom & Transitioning to Conscious Parenting w/ Domari Dickinson

🎙️DBM Episode 33: Haitian American Mama w/ Stepha LaFond

🎙️Meditations By Mamas: Full Moon/Shedding Meditation featuring Stepha LaFond

✨MERCH OF THE MONTH - Black Mama Magic Card Deck ✨

✨PATREON BONUS CONTENT  - Grounding lead by Thea: “If I surrender to the air I can ride it” - Toni Morrison✨

ABOUT OUR GUEST:

Stepha is a Life Coach, Mentor, and Speaker, dedicated to helping moms navigate the space between who they were and who they’re still becoming. As a mom of two young children, she knows firsthand the struggles of juggling the demands of motherhood, career, and life. She started her practice out of a desire to put moms at the center of the conversation, with an emphasis on shifting the narrative on modern motherhood to one that allows space for mamas to grow, heal and take care of themselves at all stages of their journey. Her work on Matrescence- the transition into motherhood- invites her clients and spectators to explore and hold space for this common but rarely discussed phase of development, whilst taking a critical look at the unjust systems and power structures impacting motherhood and creating necessary shifts towards liberation.

Connect with Stepha LaFond & Unlearning Motherhood: Instagram 

🔗 Connect with Dem Black Mamas

• Instagram
• YouTube

🗣️Engage: This is a conversation.  Share your thoughts about the episode using the hashtag #DemBlackMamas, DM us or email us at magic@demblackmamas.com.

For full show notes & transcript, check out our website:  demblackmamas.com

Dear Mama,

Who is the girl the woman who survived in the belly of the boat that brought you here? Where did she come from?  How do we find our way back to that place?  Why should we find our way back to that place?  In this episode, WE JOURNEY & Dr. Gina Paige, co-founder of African Ancestry is ridin with us! Along the way:

✨Thea shares the profound impact of tracing African roots through DNA had on her

✨NeKisha reveals the impact Dr. Paige’s business model had on her journey as a tech innovator 

✨Dr. Paige reminds us that the ancestors are a cloud of witnesses always working in our favor with a beautiful story about Chadwick Boseman. 

But the road isn't always smooth.  We delve into some tough terrain when Crystal shares a personal story about her trip to South Africa that brought her face to face with the complexities and idealizations of her African Heritage.

💗Black Mama Magic Card for this episode: Card # 39 - My Children Are My Teachers💗

EPISODES MENTIONS/RELEVANT TO THIS EPISODE:

🎙️DBM Ep 4: How I Made It Ova

🎙️DBM Ep 27 The Upper Room

✨MERCH OF THE MONTH - Black Mama Magic Card Deck ✨

✨PATREON BONUS CONTENT  - Issa Black Thang: Default Oven Temperatures✨

ABOUT OUR GUEST:

Dr. Gina Paige, co-founder of African Ancestry, Inc. (AfricanAncestry.com), is a pioneering luminary known for revolutionizing African lineage tracing through genetics. Starting her entrepreneurial journey at age 8 with a magazine to fund family trips. Before AfricanAncestry.com, she led GPG Strategic Marketing Resources.  Paige travels globally to demystify African roots, promoting Black identity empowerment through ancestral connections. She has traced the ancestry of prominent figures like Oprah Winfrey, John Legend, and Chadwick Boseman. A sought-after speaker and partner for corporations like Netflix and Nike, Paige collaborates with community and faith-based organizations worldwide.  Featured in Time Magazine and on platforms like PBS' Finding Your Roots, Paige co-hosted African Ancestry Radio and appeared on MSNBC and CNN. She holds degrees from Stanford University and the University of Michigan Ross School of Business and received an Honorary Doctor of Philosophy. 

Connect with Dr. Gina Paige: Instagram | Website

Grab an African Ancestry Test Kit 

🔗 Connect with Dem Black Mamas

• Instagram
• Patreon
• YouTube

🗣️Engage: This is a conversation.  Speak back to us!  Share your thoughts about the episode using the hashtag #DemBlackMamas, DM us or email us at magic@demblackmamas.com.

For full show notes & transcript, check out our website:  demblackmamas.com

Dear Mama

You are worthy to rise each day and dance in your dreams with your children by your side.

You are worthy of serenity in birth.

You are worthy of joy while holding your children.

Join Midwife Jamarah Amani of Southern Birth Justice in partnership with the WNBA for a meditation experience to remind you:  You are complete. You are not alone.  You are magic.

Meditations by Mamas are led by Black mamas to help us maintain alignment with healing, creativity, and liberation to manifest joy and abundance.

We’re coming to LA on September 3rd!!! Early bird has been EXTENDED TIL SUNDAY, AUGUST 20th. Get on the mothership & ride with us LIVE!  GET YOUR TIX NOW>>>https://demblackmamas.com/events/

For more about Jamarah visit the shownotes for this episode on our website: https://www.demblackmamas.com/podcast

Dear Mama,

What if I told you understanding menopause was a matter of life and death? In her 2022 book You Got Anything Stronger, Gabrielle Union went into deep detail about how in her words, “the surge and retreat of hormones” during perimenopause and menopause caused her to have passive suicidal ideations and pointed out that science has focused on hiding symptoms or treating the symptoms of menopause that have mattered most to men like vaginal dryness.  The part of Union’s book that made me pause (see what I did there) was when Union stated, “According to a 2020 CDC study, the suicide rate among women is highest for those ages 45-64” and calls out how women’s depression is often linked to men or their children, focusing on the external features of women’s lives and not the internal.  That’s when I knew we had to do an episode about Menopause and I knew just who turn to Omisade Burney Scott s creator of the platform Black Girl’s Guide to Surviving Menopause which includes a podcast of the same name.   

Black Mama Creative Week is the perfect time to drop this episode. Burney-Scott is a trailblazer in this field and roots her work in her spirituality producing creative projects such as Messages From the Menopausal Multiverse. In this episode, we talk: 

👉🏾Listening to your body 

👉🏾Menopause & spirituality

👉🏾Deciding to have the best sex of your life

👉🏾Bonus Content: The greatest story Nekisha ever told & why her Daddy is a REAL ONE!

So thanks for coming inside the Black Mama Magic Room.  If you’re a new listener, welcome to the ride. Remember Black Mama Creative Week kicks off Saturday, June 24th & we’re hosting a workshop on podcasting called Ask Us Anything: Composing Dynamic Questions to Create Compelling Interviews and one for entrepreneurs and Black Mama Creatives called Being the Blueprint: Tools to Help Black Mama Creatives and Entrepreneurs Design a New Path.  To sign up go to www.demblackmamas.com/events .  

CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS

• It's Black Mama Creative Week! Come celebrate with us on Instagram all week!

INVEST IN US

• Sign up for our Black Mama Creative Week Workshops. 
• Share us with one other person. 
• Become a Magic maker by getting on The Mothership (aka our newsletter). 

For full show notes check our website.

✨💗✊🏾

Dear Mama,

Our hope for you today is:

✨ For you to honor the truth of your motherhood journey

✨ Space to heal from harm, disappointment & trauma

✨ Rest in your being  to release yourself from attaching your worthiness to doing

In this special mother’s day episode we celebrate Black Motherhood through poetry, imagination and meditation with a poem by me Crystal Tennille Irby, Image a new world with NeKisha Killings and a Liberation Meditation from Thea Monyee. 

Celebrate your whole self.  It all belongs.  

Happy Mothers Day Black Mamas & don't forget Black Mama Creative Week kicks off Saturday, June 24th!

✨💗✊🏾

SHOW US SOME LOVE

• Share us with one other person. 
• Become a Magic maker by getting on The Mothership (aka our newsletter). 
• Join our Patreon 

Full transcipt and timestamp breakdown on our website at demblackmamas.com/podcast 

Dear Mama,

Dream with me.  Can you imagine a world with a Black midwife in every family, in every community, easily accessible, at our fingertips, a world in which birth choices aren’t controlled by capitalism, a world in which the birth practices that Black women used to literally birth this country are honored, a world in which they are revered, a world in which Black midwives could practice the full scope of reproductive health and reproductive choices are respected, a world in which Black mothers don’t fear death in the midst of giving birth, experience it with fully joy and bodily autonomy.  It’s Black Maternal Health Week and we are grateful for the opportunity to sit with two people invested in building that world: Jamarah Amani, founder of National Black Midwives Alliance & cofounder of Southern Birth Justice Network & filmmaker K. Sanderson  In this episode we’re talking: 

👉🏾Harriet Tubman & midwifery (Yeah we ain’t even know)

👉🏾Why the medical system fears Black midwifery (I mean we know why but still)

👉🏾The fight & journey to answer your calling (chiiilllleee this got deep)

👉🏾Their documentary series Legacy Power Voice: Movements in Black Midwifery (cause WE KNO what happens when other people tell our stories)

✨💗✊🏾

✨MERCH OF THE MONTH - MAGIC EVERMORE BOX ✨

The intention of this box is for Black Mamas to honor the light within themselves.  The items inside the Magic Evermore box will prepare Black mamas to soak up all the energy of the sun all summer and remind them of the importance of documenting themselves, the power to manifest the life you want, and to soften and pour into yourself when your mothership hits rough waters.  Items inside:

✨Full Black Mama Magic Card Deck

✨Manifestation Crystals: Citrine, Pyrite, Rose Quartz, Blue Apatite

✨Incense from Smell Good Spa

✨Mama Magic: Evermore Picture Frame

✨Postcards

✨Gratitude Jar

✨Herbs: Jasmine, Eucalyptus, & Lavender

✨An investment in yourself and in Dem Black Mamas Podcast. When you invest in us, you are investing in a platform curated by three women actively creating spaces of healing, creativity & liberation.

ABOUT OUR GUESTS

Jamarah Amani, LM is a community midwife who believes in the transformative and healing power of birth and that every baby has a human right to human milk. Her mission is to do her part to build a movement for Birth Justice locally, nationally and globally. Jamarah is the architect of the Birth Justice framework, the Black Midwives Model of Care and the Birth Justice Bill of Rights. Jamarah identifies as Black, Femme and Queer.  A community organizer from the age of sixteen, Jamarah has worked with several organizations across the United States, the Caribbean and in Africa on various public health issues, including HIV prevention, infant mortality risk reduction, access to emergency contraception and access to midwifery care. As a birth worker and activist, Jamarah has been tackling issues of racial justice, including the epidemics of Black maternal and infant morbidity/mortality for over fifteen years. She is currently the Executive Director of Southern Birth Justice Network, (https://southernbirthjustice.org/) a 501(c)3 non-profit organization working to expand the Birth Justice movement and to make midwifery and doula care accessible to marginalized communities. She is also the co-founder of National Black Midwives Alliance, (https://blackmidwivesalliance.org/) the only national professional association in the U.S. specifically for midwives of African descent, and a founding member of the Queer and Transgender Midwives Association.

Karyl-Lyn Sanderson (they/them), affectionately known as K, is a non-binary visionary, artist and entrepreneur with over 20 years of work experience as a digital media producer. K’s mission is to shift societal paradigms while enriching and advancing the lives of those they serve. With their daring and joyful spirit, K takes on projects that bring greater exposure to causes and issues of importance.  For over a decade, K created groundbreaking media as the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of Limitless New Media, an independently operated creative studio that designed a wide array of original content for community, educational and faith-based initiatives. K is an alumni of NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts, Film and Television Production program.

OTHER IMPORTANT LINKS

• History of Florida Midwife & 1965 Medicaid Legislation 
• The Woman King
• Michelle Browder Mothers of Gynecolgy

All other links mentioned in the episode & full show notes on our website at demblackmamas.com/podcast 

Thanks for coming inside the Black Mama Magic Room.  If you’re a new listener, welcome to the ride. If you’re a newbie or an OG, order our intentionally curated  Our Magic Evermore Box which is our Merch of Month by May 1st and receive it in time for Mother’s Day. 

✨💗✊🏾