Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast Dates & Mates with Damona Hoffman

In this special minisode, Damona breaks down the "tech trap" and why the tools that were supposed to connect us (dating apps, social media, and now AI) are quietly training us to stop trusting our own judgment.

After a summer away from the weekly show, she's back with a wake-up call: the babysitter has left the building, and it's on us to manage our own relationship with technology. This minisode includes an overview of what social scientists are calling “algorithmic entrapment” and 3 simple questions that can help you escape the cycle.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why the "texting trap" Damona coined a decade ago has grown into something much bigger
• What a recent multibillion dollar settlement against Meta reveals about how these platforms are built
• The one word Damona wants us to bring into our relationship with tech instead of fear
• Why having access to dating apps and social media means nothing without personal accountability
• The danger of asking AI to tell you what your partner "really meant" or what you should do next
• Damona's three questions to ask yourself before you swipe, scroll, or respond
• What's next for the show and how you can help shape it

Resources & Links:

Take the two-minute survey at damonahoffman.com/survey and let us know how Damona can continue to support you!

Now taking calls and questions for the Dear Damona social media series: 424-246-6255. Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Interested in booking Damona to speak to your group or company? Find out more at DamonaHoffman.com/speaking

In this minisode, Damona breaks down what manifestation actually is and why most of us have been doing it wrong. After leading her Love Lab residency at Civana Wellness Resort, she came away with one very clear truth: most of us are already on the edge of a major shift. What's missing isn't the dream. It's the plan to get there.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why manifestation isn’t really magic, and what it actually requires from you
• The samskara pattern that keeps you circling the same frustrations in love, work, and life
• The moment Damona walked away from her dream job without a plan, and what happened next
• The 51% rule of manifestation
• The one simple question from Damona’s life coach that changed everything
• What a Breakthrough Boost is and who it’s designed for

Resources & Links:

Learn more about working with Damona one-on-one at damonahoffman.com/breakthrough

Get F the Fairytale at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or wherever you get your books

Join Damona in Arizona for her Love Lab workshops at Civana at DamonaHoffman.com/lovelab

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

In this special masterclass finale, Damona leads you through Fairy Tale Therapy, a guided experience to help you identify the unconscious dating myths quietly running your dating life, define the relationship pillars that will hold up your real love story, and step into your future through a powerful guided visualization.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• How to identify the dating myth that's been quietly running your love life
• The three questions that reveal exactly what you believe about love and where that belief came from
• How to tell when a belief is protecting you versus holding you back
• The difference between preferences and pillars and why your real non-negotiables go deeper
• A guided visualization to invite in new love

Resources & Links:

Download your free episode companion worksheet and take the next steps at damonahoffman.com/next

Get F the Fairytale at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or wherever you get your books

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255.

Join Damona in Arizona in her Love Lab workshops at Civana at DamonaHoffman.com/lovelab

Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook and submit questions or inquire about Damona’s keynotes or workshops

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

In this Dear Damona episode, we tackle what to do when someone keeps canceling last minute before you've even had a first date, and how to tell the difference between giving someone a fair chance and letting them waste your time.

This week, a listener named Jenna shares:

"I matched with a guy on a dating app and followed your advice. After a week of messaging, I asked him for a brief phone call. He was so fun to talk to, and we seemed aligned. We agreed to meet for drinks after work. The day of the date came, and at lunchtime he texted and apologized that a work emergency came up and he had to cancel. He asked to reschedule and we found a day the following week, and he canceled again with a similar work situation."

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why that gut feeling of resistance before rescheduling is actually your bodily wisdom talking
• The real difference between the benefit of the doubt and gullibility
• The must-do screening steps that reduce ghosting and flakiness
• What two last-minute cancels actually reveal about someone's priorities
• The hidden cost of rescheduling for someone who keeps flaking

Resources & Links:

Unlock the secret to successful dating with our Date Tracker at ⁠Damonahoffman.com/datetracker ⁠

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255. Follow @DamonaHoffman on ⁠Instagram⁠, ⁠TikTok⁠, or ⁠Facebook⁠ and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

In this Dear Damona episode, we discuss how to navigate multiple long-distance connections, when to book that first in-person meeting, and how to handle the money talk before you pack your bag. If you've matched with someone across the country (or the ocean) and you're not sure what to do next, this is your guide!

This week, a listener named Maryanne shares:

"I'm 71 and looking for a long-term partner. I went on two niche sites and matched with a few good options, but they all live elsewhere. One lives in Hawaii and he invited me over for a week. The other guy lives in LA and both seem serious about me. There is even a guy in Mexico who has come on the scene just after the other two. What's the best way to meet out of town dates? How do I know who pays for what? When do I tell them I am also meeting other men?"

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why expanding your dating pool across time zones can actually work in your favor
• The one-day-to-one-week rule every long distance dater needs to know
• How to build real connection before you ever book a flight
• The eight-week milestone that changes everything
• Why staying at his place for a first meeting is a hard no (and what to do instead)
• How to handle the money conversation without making it awkward
• When you actually need to tell someone you're seeing other people

Resources and Links:

Unlock the secret to successful dating with our Date Tracker at Damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255. Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this special Valentine's Day episode, Damona hears insights from John Kim (The Angry Therapist), Vedic astrologer Carol Allen, Authors of Getting it Right This Time Orna & Matthew Walters, feminist dating coach Lily Womble, and Seth Hoffman (her husband) about what they got wrong about love and what they got right.

She asks each of them two questions: What's the biggest relationship myth you once believed that turned out to be untrue? And what's the one pillar that actually keeps your relationship standing today?

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why doing "the work" on yourself isn't a one-time fix that makes love easy
• Why “the spark” fizzles out
• How a fixed mindset keeps you stuck
• The one way out of the friend zone
• How much is too much to share on a date
• The secret quality that couples need to thrive
• The feeling of true connection vs. chemistry
• The #1 Pillar in Damona’s relationship

Guest Links:

• John Kim (The Angry Therapist): theangrytherapist.com
• Carol Allen: loveisinthestars.com
• Orna & Matthew Walters: loveonpurpose.com / Book: Getting It Right This Time
• Lily Womble: datebrazen.com / Book: Thank You More Please

Resources and Links:

Pick up F The Fairytale: Rewrite the Dating Myths and Live Your Love Story on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, or your local bookseller. Find links at fthefairytalebook.com

Join Damona LIVE at Civana Wellness Resort in Carefree, Arizona on Feb. 14-15 or April 15-17th (DamonaHoffman.com/lovelab) to reserve your room and your space in Damona’s workshops

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

In this Dear Damona episode, we cover revenge reporting, why dating app systems meant to protect us sometimes get weaponized, and how to handle rejection with grace while protecting yourself when things go sideways.

This week, a listener named Lisa shares:

"I just didn't think this was gonna be good. So I wrote him a respectful message. He responded respectfully. And within an hour I get an email from match.com that my account had been canceled due to some misbehavior. I know in my gut that guy was vindictive and turned me in. Is this a thing?"

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why trusting your intuition early saves you time and emotional energy later
• The right way to exit a match without overexplaining or giving someone ammunition
• What revenge reporting is and who it disproportionately hurts
• How dating app moderation works and why they block first, ask questions later
• What to do if you get banned from a dating app and how to appeal

Resources and Links:

Unlock the secret to successful dating with our Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker.

Join Damona for in person workshops at Civana Wellness resort on February 14th and 15th and April 15-17th! 

• Click HERE 
• Enter code: VWGDAMONA

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255. Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

In this Dear Damona epsiode, we address what happens when you are late to the dating game, why dating is a skill you build through practice, and how to protect yourself without closing off to opportunity. If you're new to dating or want to approach it with a beginner's mind, this episode is a must-listen

This week, a listener named Butterfly shares:

"I am now in my late twenties and struggling to find a mate. I had strict parents and wasn't allowed to date in high school or my early twenties. I never tried with relationships, and now that I'm getting older, I'm in a place where I'd like a relationship, but I can never find the first person. I feel like the men I've tried to date have taken advantage of my naivety and wasted my time with no real intentions. I don't know how to build a genuine bond with someone and don't know what to look for and what to avoid. Can you help?"

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why dating is a skill you build through practice, not something you're supposed to magically know

• The real reason people seem to "waste your time"

• Green flags to look for that signal someone is worthy of your trust and attentionThe "name and narrate" strategy

• How to approach dating with a beginner's mind at any stage of life

Resources and Links: 

Unlock the secret to successful dating with our Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker.

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255.  Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Join us IN PERSON at Civana Resort - book your space for February 14-15 now: https://be.synxis.com/?Hotel=7841&Chain=25041&promo=VWGDAMONA and enter code: VWGDAMONA

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Sabrina Zohar, dating expert and host of the Sabrina Zohar Show, discusses navigating breakups without self-blame, understanding dating anxiety, and finally breaking the patterns that keep you stuck. If you’re starting 2026 single or considering breaking off a relationship, this episode is a must-listen

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why January is officially "breakup month" and how the holidays reveal what we've been avoiding all year
• The 5-minute compassion practice that helped Sabrina move through major loss and heartbreak
• How texting has turned dating into a dopamine slot machine and how to break the vicious cycle
• The difference between hurting someone's feelings, harming them, and helping them
• How a tickingbiological clock can lead to different dating choices
• How to transform  a breakup into a learning opportunity
• Sabrina's plea to stop weaponizing attachment styles and treating your partner like a project

Resources and Links

Follow Sabrina Zohar on Instagram @SabrinaZohar and listen to The Sabrina Zohar Show wherever you get your podcasts.

Unlock the Secret to Successful Dating with our Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255 Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Damona is joined by her good friend Danny Santos, shaman, healer, astrologer, and tarot reader, to look at the astrology of 2026 and how it’s setting the stage for love this year.

What You'll Hear In This Episode

• Key transits and cosmic shifts to watch out for in the year ahead
• Which houses in your birth chart actually matter for compatibility, and why your moon sign may reveal more than your sun sign 
• Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce's astrological compatibility breakdown, plus celebrity couples Danny is watching in 2026
• The Year of the Horse energy: how to use the adventurous energy of the year to propel you into love

Resources and Links

Book a session with Danny Santos at santoscrystalvisions.com  and use code DATES for 10% off your first session

Follow Danny on Instagram @SantosCrystalVisions

Unlock the Secret to Successful Dating with our Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker 

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255

Follow @DamonaHoffman on TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook, and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

How many times have you swiped through endless options and come up empty? You've got matches, you've got conversations, but you don't have clarity. And clarity is what dating in 2026 is all about.

In this episode, we share what the data is telling us about the future of dating and relationships. Damona isn’t making vague predictions; she shares 9 clear themes that are likely to emerge this year,grounded in research from major dating apps, relationship trends, and over 15 years of coaching singles through their love lives. We break down what "all or nothing" really means for your dating life, why effort is becoming the bare minimum, and how authenticity is actually your superpower.

This is the year singles stop negotiating with maybe.

• Why 2026 is the year of all or nothing: clarity is replacing ambiguity
• How "clear-coding" your intentions upfront is replacing ghosting and emotional labor
• Why effort and consistency are becoming the bare minimum, not optional
• The surprising shift around dinner dates and what it actually signals about romance
• The declaration you’re likely to be making on your social media accounts
• Why low-volume dating with high engagement is the new strategy that actually works
• The biggest relationship buzzword of 2026

Track your patterns and move forward with clarity.

Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Got a relationship question for 2026?

Follow @DamonaHoffman on ⁠TikTok⁠, ⁠Instagram⁠, and ⁠Facebook⁠, and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What is the magical first date zone between oversharing and playing it too cool?

A listener named Brian shares:

"I realize I have two dating modes. Either I dump all my emotional baggage on the first date, or I stay super chill and keep everything surface level, even when I want to go deeper. I've been hurt enough times that I just don't trust people to really be there for me anymore. How do I communicate in a healthy way without either overwhelming someone or hiding completely?"

In this episode, we break down what's actually happening underneath both extremes. They're not opposites; they come from the same place. 

We look at the difference between throwing your pain at someone and letting them discover who you really are. Plus, we share the framework that helps you build trust gradually, without becoming either the person who overshares or the person who keeps everyone at arm's length.

What You'll Hear:

Ready to get clarity on what's working in your dating life?

Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker to track your patterns and see where real connection starts to happen.

Got a question about vulnerability, trust, or showing up authentically on dates?

Follow @DamonaHoffman on ⁠TikTok⁠, ⁠Instagram⁠, and ⁠Facebook⁠, and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime. Or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

You've been married for 29 years. You're newly separated at 52. Your inbox is suddenly full of men in their twenties and thirties. And you're sitting there wondering: what the heck is going on?

A listener we call Confused in Coatesville shares:

"I'm separated a year in the process of divorce after 29 years of marriage. I'm 52 and I'm told that I look a lot younger. On dating apps, I'm getting hit up by a lot of 30-somethings and even late twenties. I have very little interest in somebody under the age of 40, considering that I have a 30-year-old myself. How do I get matches in my age range that would have an interest in me?"

In this episode, we unpack the real reasons younger men are reaching out, and what it actually means to date again after decades of marriage.

What You'll Hear:

• Why younger men showing up in your inbox isn't random The difference between what you needed at 23 and what actually serves you now

• How "I look younger than my age" might be working against your dating goals

• Why an age gap hits different at 50 than it does at 25

• The power of being strategic about which apps you use (and tracking your results)

• Setting boundaries with matches who aren't aligned with you…without guilt

Ready to figure out what's actually working in your dating life?

Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker to start tracking where your best matches come from and what patterns are showing up for you.

Got a question about dating after divorce, age gaps, or navigating the apps?

DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

How can you have 50+ matches and still no dates? Every conversation either fizzles out or someone reschedules and disappears. And worst of all, you keep seeing the same faces on every app year after year.

A listener named S shares:

"I end up with 50-plus matches like within 48 hours, which okay, great. But then I either get too overwhelmed by so many conversations and endless swiping and all the same people, or I narrow it down and end up with just dead conversations. And there's guys having fantastic phone calls, scheduling dates, then asking for a raincheck without suggesting a date. What is going on?"

In this episode, we talk about the real problem behind dating app burnout we will cover why the algorithm is working against you in the first two weeks, and explain how to protect your energy from people who are keeping you on the hook with no real plan.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Is the paradox of choice really what's holding you back from dates?

• The dirty little secret about how dating apps

•  What happens when you treat matches like coins in a fountain instead of fish on a line

• Why "interest" and "intention" are not the same thing

• How the one-to-one rule helps you identify who's actually serious

• When to end conversations with people who are keeping you on the hook

Ready to get better dates (not just more matches)?

Grab the Profile Starter Kit at profilestarterkit.com to learn how to write a dating profile that attracts the right people. It's $9, and the fastest way to stop wasting time on dead conversations.

Got a question about dating apps, burnout, or mixed signals?

DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Ever notice how the holidays have a way of forcing conversations you've been avoiding? When someone you're dating wants to introduce their whole life to yoursbut you've been keeping parts of that life hidden,it's not just awkward timing. It's a moment of truth.

A listener named Kayla shares:

"I've been dating this guy for 10 months and things are getting serious. He has a five-year-old son from a previous relationship, and I've met him a few times. But I haven't told my parents he has a kid yet. I know I should have mentioned it earlier, but it felt too soon, and now it feels too late. My family's having their big holiday dinner, and he wants to bring his son. Do I tell them before he comes, or should I ask him to come next year instead?"

In this episode, Damona unpacks what's really happening beneath the surface: it's not your parents' reaction you're most afraid of,it's committing fully to a relationship that includes a child. You'll hear why silence and omission create more distance than honesty ever will, and how to move from avoidance to authentic integration with your family.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• The weight of carrying a secret

• Why dating someone with a child is a high-stakes situation

• How to reframe your own expectations to accept the full picture of someone's life

• The difference between protecting hiding 

• The hidden opportunity in a holiday meet up

Want to track what's working (and what's not) in your dating life? Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Got a relationship question? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

He says he wants to take things slow and get to know you organically. But when direct questions about his background get dodged, he frames your need for basic information as paranoia, and something's off.

A listener named Jada shares:

"We matched two weeks ago and the chemistry is amazing. He texts good morning and goodnight, he's enthusiastic about meeting up. But whenever I ask specifics like where he works, what neighborhood he lives in, or even his last name, he gets vague and changes the subject. He keeps saying he likes to stay mysterious and we should get to know each other organically. Part of me thinks it's charming, but another part is worried. Is asking for his last name before we meet reasonable?"

In this episode, we break down the difference between genuine mystery and information withholding.

You'll learn the practical steps to vet someone before you go in-person, what actual red flags look like in the early stages, and how to advocate for your peace of mind without feeling like you're being unreasonable.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• The difference between staying mysterious and hiding information

• How to recognize the signs of suspicious gaslighting

• Damona’s 3-step vetting process: PeopleFinders, LinkedIn, and reverse image search

• The vital online dating step you might be skipping 

• The one-to-one rule: definitive timing guidelines for dating apps

• How to protect yourself from the rise in romance scams without closing yourself off to connection

Vet your matches with PeopleFinders today! PeopleFinders has set up a special three-day trial offer for Dates & Mates listeners. Head to DamonaHoffman.com/safety to search someone's background, verify their information, and get the peace of mind you need.

Got a dating safety question or want to share what you've learned? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Your best friend used to be your first call. Now you have to schedule weeks in advance just to see her, and her new boyfriend keeps calling your friendship "codependent."

A listener named Sarah shares:

"My best friend and I have been inseparable for six years. We talk every day, we're each other's emergency contacts, and honestly she feels more like family than my actual family. But lately her new boyfriend has been making comments about how 'codependent' we are and how she needs to 'prioritize him now.' She's starting to pull back and it's breaking my heart. Am I wrong to feel like she's my person? How do I communicate to her that what we have matters just as much without sounding jealous or clingy?"

In this episode, we unpack the invisible hierarchy of love that puts romance at the top and pushes friendships aside. You'll hear why speaking up for the relationships that matter isn't selfish, it's necessary, and how to advocate for your connections without being dismissed as jealous or needy.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why romantic love doesn't automatically rank higher than friendship love
• How the "codependent" label gets weaponized against close friendships
• What it means when a partner asks someone to "prioritize him now"
• The real reason you're afraid of sounding jealous or clingy
• How to start the conversation without triggering defensiveness
• When to recognize someone is making you smaller in their life

Want to track what's working (and what's not) in your dating life? Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Got a relationship question? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

 Uncommon Goods makes holiday shopping stress-free and joyful with thousands of one-of-a-kind gifts you can't find anywhere else.  So shop early, have fun, and cross some names off your list today. To get 15% off your next gift, visit uncommongoods.com/datesmates (Cast Sensitive) _______________________________________

Ever meet someone you really like, but there's this invisible wall around certain topics they won't talk about?

A listener named Kristen shares:

"I met this guy on Hinge and we've gone out on three dates. We've talked about some personal things about family and stuff, and we have a lot of things in common. One of the things is we were both raised by single parents and one of the parents he's not as close to, and he said it's like a touchy subject for him. So I want to respect that. But I also wanna know a little bit more just to understand how they grew up and how they are as a person and all that jazz, you know?"

In this episode, we explore the delicate balance between curiosity and respect, and how to navigate those closed doors in early dating. You'll hear why someone saying "it's a touchy subject" is actually valuable information and how to build trust without pushing too hard.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• What "touchy subject" really means The paradox of wanting to protect yourself while giving someone space
• Is 3 dates, once a week the right pace for slow love?
• How trust gets built in tiny moments
• The difference between healthy boundaries and emotional unavailability
• How to model vulnerability in a new relationship

Want to track what's working (and what's not) in your dating life? Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Got a relationship or dating question? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Ever meet someone who feels right on every emotional level, but the finance math ain’t mathin’?

A listener named Ray shares:

"I met a wonderful man online. We went on two amazing dates. He's attentive, attractive, and dare I say we had a magical connection. Here's the thing: it seems he's going through a major life transition. He quit his tech job nine months ago and has been figuring it out. His phone only works on Wi-Fi and he might need to figure out a different living situation to cut costs. I've worked really hard to get to where I'm at today. I'd like someone who could meet me halfway. Is this a deal breaker?"

In this episode, we get real about what financial compatibility actually means and why wanting stability doesn't make you materialistic. You'll hear why a magical connection alone isn't enough and how to tell the difference between someone in transition versus someone who's stuck.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Red flags that deserve your digital detective skills
• What "meeting halfway" really means
• What is a fair contribution to ask from a partner
• How to contribute if you or your partner earns less 
• How resentment builds in a new relationship. 
• The questions you should be asking when someone's story doesn't quite add up

Want to track what's working (and what's not) in your dating life?Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Ever feel stuck managing someone else's emotional chaos when you're just trying to get through the day?

This week we're tackling a different kind of relationship: the one between you and your boss. What happens when someone in a professional setting starts treating you like their therapist, and you can't just hit mute, unsubscribe, block and delete and walk away?

This week, a listener shares:

"My boss talks to me like I'm her best friend…way too much info. Relationship problems, family drama, sometimes mid-meeting she'll start telling a story that's got nothing to do with work. It's super uncomfortable, but I also don't wanna create tension. How do I keep things professional when the person in charge doesn't seem to know where the line is?"

In this episode, we talk about why oversharing is a form of emotional manipulation and how to set clear but compassionate boundaries. You'll hear how to redirect without drama, why the post-pandemic return to office made boundaries messier, and how the pattern of stuffing down your feelings at work shows up in your romantic relationships too.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• When nice doesn't mean safe

• Why emotional dumping creates liability not connection

• Three real ways to redirect oversharing without risking your job

• Why boundaries make you trustworthy, not cold

• How stuffing down your feelings at work shows up in your romantic relationships

Want to track what's working (and what's not) in your dating life?Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Got a relationship question?DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

We are sharing a special episode this week, from Dr. Sharon Malone's new podcast, The Second Opinion.

On this show, women take back the conversation on health with straight talk, real experience, and the care we all deserve. You’ll hear prominent female advocates, experts and patients just like you sharing how they confronted gaps in our healthcare system and got second opinions that saved their lives.

Alongside each guest, Dr. Sharon tackles the questions and topics we’ve been conditioned to ignore - the ones we search for at 3 a.m. but never bring up at the doctor’s office. From dismissed symptoms to systemic failures, she pulls back the curtain on what’s really going on in women’s health and gives women the tools to advocate for themselves and each other.

In this episode, Dr. Sharon talks to CNN anchor and analyst Laura Coates about how she almost died during childbirth, her experience with early menopause and how she handles hot flashes on air and at home.

Dr. Sharon shares menopause warning signs and helps Laura connect what she thought were individual experiences to menopause. And the two discuss the need for improved awareness around suffering through menopause and the benefits of Hormone Replacement Therapy.

Listen to more of The Second Opinion: damonahoffman.com/secondopinion

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Ever feel like you're speaking different languages with your partner, literally? When one of you wants deep conversations over text and the other needs to actually hear a voice, it's not just frustrating. It's creating real distance.

This week, a listener shares:

"I'm seeing this guy and we have totally different ways of communicating and it's starting to become a problem. He's all about texting, like everything is through text with him. He wants to have these deep conversations over text and I'm more of a 'can we just call, can we actually talk?' person. Last week I had something I really needed to bring up with him and I texted him about it since that's what he prefers and it went so wrong."

In this episode, Damona unpacks why text-based communication has disrupted relationships more than dating apps ever did, what different communication preferences reveal about emotional processing, and how to bridge the gap without losing yourself in the compromise.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why texting is a new form of communication that must be learned
• How the “Why” behind someone’s communication style tells you everything
• A practical framework for having "communication about communication" 
• Scripts for setting up “The Talk” about communication
• New ways to assess compatibility
• 4 ways to reconnect beyond a text message

Resources & Links:

Want to track what's working (and what's not) in your dating life? Download the free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com/datetracker

Got a communication question? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook, or leave a voicemail or text at 424-246-6255

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Help Dates & Mates win a Signal Award! Vote by October 9th at damonahoffman.com/award

Loving someone who can't love you back the same way is one of the most tender, complicated situations in relationships. Sometimes the safest relationship in your life becomes the hardest one to navigate, and the person who knows you best is also the one you want most.

This week, a listener shares:

"I'm in love with my best friend. I'm a queer woman in my thirties and she's straight in her mid to late twenties. We've gotten progressively closer to the point where people think we are dating. My therapist told me my friend is the safest relationship that I have in my life. So sometimes I do wonder if what I'm perceiving as romantic love is just a really healthy friendship. Do I tell my best friend I'm in love with her? If I don't, how do I protect my heart and continue to have this incredible friendship that I never want to give up?"

In this episode, Damona explores what happens when deep friendship intersects with romantic feelings. You'll hear about the difference between emotional safety and romantic compatibility, why fantasy relationships feel easier than real ones, and how to navigate truth-telling without causing collateral damage to the relationship that matters most.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why feeling safe with someone doesn't automatically make them your romantic match

• How staying in the fantasy can keep you emotionally unavailable to real possibilities

• The critical questions to ask yourself before revealing feelings to a friend

• What it costs you to stay silent when romantic feelings are involved

• Why creating distance might be the most clarifying move you can make right now

• How to baby step into gauging openness without risking everything at once

• What it means to proceed with compassion for both yourself and your friend

Resources & Links:

Got a relationship question? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook

Leave a voicemail or text: 424-246-6255

Dates & Mates is a finalist for a Signal Award! We need your support to ensure Love Wins! Vote for Dates & Mates at ⁠damonahoffman.com/award⁠

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Do you believe that Love Wins? Dates & Mates is a finalist for our first-ever Signal Award, and we need every single listener to make their voice heard. We are the ONLY relationship-focused and independently produced podcast nominated in the How To & Advice category. 

If you have ever been helped, inspired, or changed by listening to this podcast, this is the moment to let me know.

It takes 30 seconds or less to VOTE at damonahoffman.com/award. 

**********************************

You've mastered the logistics of life together, but somewhere along the way, you stopped actually living it together.

This week, a listener shares:

"I'm lonely in my own marriage. We've been together 12 years and we're like this well-oiled machine. Kids get to practice, bills are paid, house doesn't fall apart, but that's it. We don't actually talk anymore, just coordinate. Last week I realized we hadn't had a real conversation in probably two months. When I brought it up, he was like, 'what's wrong? We're good. We don't fight.' But I'm dying here. I miss my husband."

In this episode, Damona explores what happens when couples perfect the art of co-managing but lose the skills of co-connecting. You'll hear why functional doesn't have to mean emotionally empty, and how to bridge the gap when one person doesn't even see the problem.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• Why becoming a "well-oiled machine" can actually work against your relationship

• How to practice intimacy skills the same way you schedule soccer practice

• The difference between absence of conflict and presence of connection

• Why two months without real conversation signals an emotional drought

• How to get from logistics to feelings without blindsiding your partner

• What "relationship amnesia" looks like and how to recover those lost skills

• Why missing someone who's sitting right next to you hits so differently

Resources & Links:

Got a relationship question? DM @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook

Leave a voicemail or text: 424-246-6255

Dates & Mates is a finalist for a Signal Award! We need your support to ensure Love Wins! Vote for Dates & Mates at damonahoffman.com/award

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

What happens if you get to the third date and it still feels awkward? Grin and bear it? Or keep waiting for chemistry? And how can you trust that your gut is telling you the right thing?

This week, a listener shares: "I met a man who checks every box on paper. He’s kind, reliable, matches my values… but I feel absolutely nothing. No spark. No butterflies. Is something wrong with me?"

In this episode, Damona shares the truth about emotional resonance, why the three-date rule isn’t a trap, and how to tell the difference between being too picky and being truly honest with yourself. 

You’ll hear how to identify the signals your body sends you, why humor matters more than you think, and why being “decent” should never be the bar.

What You'll Hear In This Episode:

• What the three-date rule really means (and what it doesn’t)
• Why “good on paper” doesn’t always translate to connection
• How to tell if you're genuinely curious or just people-pleasing
• The surprising role of humor in long-term compatibility
• How to do an energy check after every date
• What your nervous system is trying to tell you
• The difference between settling and staying open

Connect With Us:

• Get your copy of "F the Fairy Tale: Rewrite the Dating Myths and Live Your Own Love Story"
• Unlock the Secret to Successful Dating with our ⁠⁠Date Tracker⁠⁠
• Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255
• Follow @damonahoffman on ⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠, ⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠, and ⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠, and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

This week, Damona is joined by her longtime friend, TV and TikTok superstarMatchmaker Maria, a fourth-generation matchmaker with no time for fairy tale fluff. 

They get real about why dating feels so lonely now,, the truth about relationship timelines, and why your deep texting doesn’t count as actual connection.

Whether you're stuck on the apps or spiraling in dating burnout, Maria shares practical tools from her new book Ask a Matchmaker that will help you reset your mindset, clarify your compatibility, and finally stop waiting for someone to “just get it.”

What You’ll Hear In This Episode

• Why dating has become a solo sport and what to do about it

• The truth about the male loneliness epidemic and community loss
• How siloization is killing our dating lives
• Maria’s 5 pillars of compatibility and why they actually work
• How the 12-Date Rule leads to real connection (and yes, sex can wait)
• The sneaky trap of texting-as-dating
• Why bangs and Alicia Keys might be holding you back
  

Resources and Links

Connect with Maria on Instagram. Facebook, and TikTok Get the book ⁠Ask a Matchmaker⁠

Unlock the Secret to Successful Dating with our ⁠Date Tracker⁠

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255

Follow @damonahoffman on ⁠Instagram⁠, ⁠TikTok⁠, and ⁠Facebook⁠, and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

We often talk about romance, but this week, we’re taking a closer look at the quiet epidemic affecting millions: the erosion of deep friendships and emotional openness, especially among men.

What happens when someone says “I miss you”... and it feels too risky to say it back? How do cultural norms shape our ability to express care, and how can we start to rebuild emotional intimacy, not just in partnerships, but in friendships too?

This week’s episode was inspired by a friend of the show, Douglas, whose candid moment with his wife sparked a much bigger conversation about vulnerability, gender norms, and the loneliness many are too afraid to name.

This week, a listener shares:

“Last night my wife told me she was getting lunch with a friend after getting a text that said ‘I miss you.’ I told her it’s nice women can say that — but guys can’t. She insisted we could. I’m not convinced. What do you think?”

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• Why men’s close friendships have declined dramatically in the last 30 years
• How emotional repression becomes loneliness, rage, and disconnection
• Why “guys don’t say I miss you” is a cultural myth we need to break
• The generational shift that teaches boys to shut down emotional expression
• Three step-by-step scripts to help you reconnect or form new friendships
• How to create low-pressure connection points that foster deeper bonds
• Why you don’t need permission to reach out,  just a little courage

Resources & Links: Unlock the Secret to Successful Dating with our Date Tracker

Call or text your question to: 424-246-6255

Follow @damonahoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook, and submit questions via DM or voice memo anytime.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

We’ve all had that one date…the one that felt like lightning. Everything clicks, and before you know it, you're imagining forever. But when you act on that high too quickly, reality can come crashing down hard.

This week, a listener shares: “Late at night, I had to get these thoughts off my mind. I told her I felt like I think I'd found my wife. She expressed that she was disappointed that I would say this after what she told me about moving too fast and that it was best we not see each other.”

In this episode, Damona breaks down what really happens when you come on too strong — and why even the most intense connection can’t be rushed. You’ll hear how fantasy thinking can override our better judgment, why texting late at night can sabotage a budding connection, and how to make amends when you've crossed a line. Most importantly, Damona offers real steps for recovery, both emotional and relational.

• The neuroscience behind why we overshare when we feel a spark
• How to tell if it’s a true connection or a fantasy projection
• Why texting your feelings late at night is rarely a good move
• What to say if you’ve overwhelmed someone with big emotions
• How to show up as your full self without rushing the process
• The one mistake people make after hearing someone’s boundary
• A script for taking accountability while leaving the door open

Download the Frustration-Free Dating Guide: DamonaHoffman.com

Leave a voicemail or text your question: 424-246-6255

Follow @DamonaHoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook DM or voice memo your question to be featured in a future Dear Damona segment

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Grief changes us, and sometimes, it’s also what brings us together.

This week, a listener shares: “My partner and I both lost our spouses, and we bonded over that. Now, three months in, I’m the only one opening up and being vulnerable. Am I asking too much? Or moving too fast?”

In this episode, Damona explores what it really means to show up emotionally after loss, and why vulnerability often doesn’t look the same from both sides. You’ll hear how to honor your own emotional pace, set gentle boundaries, and recognize the difference between emotional availability and avoidance—even when love is in the room.

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• Why shared grief doesn’t always mean shared emotional timing
• How to spot different expressions of vulnerability (and not miss what’s there)
• What to do when language that’s meant to be playful actually feels off
• How to speak up about emotional needs without creating conflict
• Why “moving in” can’t solve emotional distance

Resources & Links: Download Damona’s Frustration Free Dating Guide at DatesandMates.com

Got a question? Text or leave a voicemail for Damona at 424-246-6255

Follow @damonahoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook Submit your question via voice memo or DM to have it answered on a future episode.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Friendships can be some of our most important relationships, but they don’t always stay the same. 

Careers, relationships, moves, and life stages can all shift the way we connect, sometimes leaving us wondering if the closeness we once had is gone for good.

This week, a listener shares:

“My best friend and I used to share everything. Lately, it’s just work updates and weekend plans. When I try to talk about deeper stuff, the subject changes. Are we growing apart, or is there a way back?”

In this episode Damona shares why even the strongest bonds can feel distant and offers practical, low-pressure ways to reignite connection. 

You’ll learn how to adapt to friendship changes, bring back emotional depth, and keep your support network thriving without it feeling awkward or forced. Plus you’ll also get vital communication tips that you can apply to dating or to feel more connected to people in your world.

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• The role of “resistance” in making things feel weird and how to lean into it
• Why longevity doesn’t always equal depth in a friendship
• Using shared memories and storytelling to re-open emotional doors
• The power of intentional questions and the “pause” in deepening connection
• Why diversifying your emotional support network is key to resilience
• Low-stakes ways to invite deeper conversations without making it awkward
  Resources & Links:

Download Damona’s Frustration Free Dating Guide at DatesandMates.com

Got a question? Text or leave a voicemail for Damona at 424-246-6255

Follow @damonahoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook and submit your question via voice memo or DM to have it answered on a future episode

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

A long-time listener sent in a heartfelt question:

“My Mom constantly has opinions about who I should date, what kind of guy is right for me, even how I should look or act to attract the right person… one comment from her has me spiraling.”

In this episode, Damona explores how well-meaning love advice can actually sabotage your future relationships and offers step-by-step strategies for gently setting boundaries and building up your own self-confidence.

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• Why outside opinions (especially from parents) can derail your dating momentum
• How to shift from second-guessing to self-trust in your dating decisions
• The invisible cost of oversharing—and how to protect your emotional energy
• Pre-date and post-date rituals that build confidence and clarity
• Damona’s personal rulebook for managing advice overload
• When to share... and when to keep your dating life to yourself

Resources & Links:

Get clarity on your dating patterns with Damona’s FREE Date Tracker

Have a question about dating or any relationship that matters to you? Text or leave a voicemail for Damona at 424-246-6255 

DM @damonahoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

A longtime listener sent in a question that speaks to something many women have wondered:

“How does one become a woman who builds up a man and always makes them more confident and stronger? How do I get into my feminine state and energy around a guy on a date?”

In this episode, Damona shares what it really means to be “in your feminine,” explores the gender polarity debate, and offers a new way to think about strength, softness, and self-worth in modern relationships.

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• How to support your partner without losing yourself
• Why feminine energy isn’t a fix—it’s often a performance
• How dating narratives get passed down and when to rewrite them
• Why your wholeness—not your polarity—attracts the right match
• What true balance looks like in an equal partnership

Resources & Links:

Download Damona’s FREE Frustration-Free Dating Guide

Got a question? Text or leave a voicemail for Damona at 424-246-6255

Follow @damonahoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

After watching The Materialists, a long-time listener sent in a question that struck a chord:

“What’s it going to take for us to kill the curve and stop dating by height, BMI, salary, or things that don’t speak to true character?” 

In this episode, Damona unpacks the real-life impact of checklist dating, explores the illusions behind modern matchmaking, and responds with practical advice for anyone who’s ever felt overlooked or friend-zoned.

Plus, she shares her “Nice Guy 9” framework—9 simple shifts that help you connect more deeply and date more intentionally.

What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• How dating checklists quietly sabotage real connection

• What The Materialists gets right—and dangerously wrong—about dating culture

• The matchmaking myth and what it really costs (literally and emotionally)

• Why bad boys always win—and why that isn’t actually what’s happening

• The Nice Guy Nine: Damona’s go-to dating strategy for deeper connection

• How to shift your love story by changing the stories you tell yourself
  

Resources & Links:

• Download Damona’s FREE Date Tracker
• Got a question? Text or leave a voicemail for Damona at 424-246-6255
• Follow @damonahoffman on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook
• Order F the Fairytale on Amazon, B&N, or from your local bookseller

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

This week, Damona takes on a question from longtime listener Vernee, who’s back in the dating scene after a hiatus… and hitting a wall when it comes to finding someone who shares her political and social justice values.

Vernee asks: "I'm politically progressive, very values-driven, and living in a purple state. I've tried everything — hints in my profile, direct chats — but nothing’s working. Where are the men who believe what I believe?"

If you’ve ever wondered how to communicate what matters without scaring people off — or how to find someone who’s actually aligned — this one’s for you.

In this episode:

• Why dating apps might feel harder now than they did just a few years ago

• How political identity and core values have become deeply intertwined

• What to say in your profile (and what to leave out)

• Why texting about politics rarely works — and what to try instead

• Where to meet values-aligned people beyond the apps

• The line between staying open-minded and lowering your standards

Submit your question: call or text 424-246-6255

Follow Damona on IG: @damonahoffman

Get your free Date Tracker at damonahoffman.com

Order F the Fairytale on Amazon, B&N, or from your local bookseller

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Dating today isn’t always smooth sailing. There’s ghosting, bad first dates, texting traps... and if you’re feeling stuck in the same old dating loops, you’re not alone.

In this Dates & Mates Master Class, Damona Hoffman breaks down the eight most common dating mistakes she sees after 15+ years of coaching singles, and shares actionable fixes to help you date smarter, not harder.

Whether you’re tired of swiping, struggling to make real connections, or caught in negative self-talk, this episode gives you the clarity and tools to reset your dating approach.

What you’ll learn:

• How to stop ghosting, and stop getting ghosted
  

• The danger of “obliga-swiping” and how to date with intention
  

• Why texting too much before a date kills chemistry
  

• The power of refreshing your dating profile regularly
  

• How to overcome negative self-talk and fear of starting over
  

• Why having a dating plan beats waiting for a fairy tale
  

If you have questions about your love life, Damona wants to hear from you. DM her on Instagram, TikTok, or Facebook @damonahoffman or leave a voicemail at 424-246-6255 for a chance to have your question answered in an upcoming Dear Damona segment.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Damona Hoffman breaks down one of the most important moments in dating—the first date—and how to make it count. Whether you’re getting back out there or swiping with new optimism, this episode shares how to set yourself up for success so that first date leads to a second.

Damona covers everything from whether to Google your date to how long a first date should really last, what to wear, where to go, and how to follow up. She even shares seven fun, low-pressure first date ideas that help build real connection.

What you’ll learn:

• How long a first date should actually last
  

• Why dinner dates don’t set you up for success
  

• The value of a pre-date phone call (and when to do video)
  

• What to wear to make the best first impression
  

• How to choose a first date location that creates connection
  

• Seven easy, fun, and affordable first date ideas
  

If you have a relationship or communicationquestion you’d like answered on a future episode, send Damona a DM on Instagram, Facebook, or TikTok @damonahoffman or leave a voicemail at 424-246-6255.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

REWIND: Dear Damona – Besties’ Bro & Never Been Kissed

In this standout Dates & Mates Rewind episode, Damona tackles your real dating dilemmas with her signature no-nonsense advice.

From navigating awkward crushes to handling tricky conversations about intimacy, this episode is packed with guidance to help you date with clarity and confidence.

If you’ve ever wondered what to do when your boyfriend avoids sex, how to approach dating when you’ve never been kissed, or whether it’s okay to filter for men with degrees, this episode has you covered.

You’ll also hear Damona’s take on modern challenges like dating someone with an OnlyFans account, dealing with phones on dates, and whether fudging your age on apps is ever worth it.

What you’ll learn:

• How to stop hiding behind dating app filters and set meaningful standards
• What to say when intimacy is missing in your relationship
• When it’s time to stay or go in a relationship that feels stuck
• The truth about age on dating apps — and whether honesty is really the best policy
• How to navigate dating when you feel inexperienced
• Setting boundaries when your partner has an OnlyFans or a highly public life
  

If you have your own dating question, Damona wants to hear from you. Send a voice memo on Instagram @damonahoffman or leave a voicemail at 424-246-6255 for a chance to have your question answered in an upcoming Dear Damona segment.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

This week on Dates & Mates, Damona Hoffman rewinds to her 400th episode featuring a guest who helped inspire the show from the start: the legendary Dr. Drew Pinsky. Dr. Drew has spent decades giving love, sex, and mental health advice on Loveline, Celebrity Rehab, and now on his podcast Ask Dr. Drew, which he co-hosts with his wife of over 30 years.

In this vulnerable and heartfelt episode, Dr. Drew shares his personal journey through a seven-year on-and-off courtship, what finally made him ready for commitment, and how he and his wife maintain a strong marriage after decades together. Plus, he joins Damona to answer your dating questions in a special extended Dear Damona segment.

What you’ll learn:

• Why emotional readiness matters more than "the one"

• How to navigate on-again/off-again dynamics with clarity

• When to disclose a medical condition or disability to a new partner

• Why gratitude and daily check-ins are key to long-term love

• What makes someone feel "unapproachable" in dating and how to shift it

• How to know when you're ready to date after trauma or burnout

This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most timeless and transformative conversations from the Dates & Mates archive.

Subscribe now to catch every Rewind drop and our Spring bonus episodes the moment they go live.

Listen to more of Dr. Drew on the Ask Dr. Drew podcast and follow him @drdrewpinsky.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

This week on Dates & Mates, Damona Hoffman rewinds to one of her favorite conversations with love coach and viral content creator Shaun Galanos. Shaun is the host of The Love Drive podcast and has become a rising voice in game-free, radically honest dating advice—and this episode shows you exactly why.

In this raw and radically honest episode, Shaun and Damona go head-to-head on the dating games that hold us back, how to ask for what you want in bed, and what to do when someone won’t give you a straight answer. From emotional stonewalling to the pressure of dating app perfectionism, they unpack it all.

What you’ll learn:

• Why radical honesty is the only dating strategy worth mastering

• How to bring up uncomfortable topics without pushing people away

• What stonewalling actually says—and how to respond to it

• How to explore kink, sexual compatibility, and deeper intimacy with confidence

• Why optimizing for the “perfect” person might leave you lonely

• How to hold your power as a strong woman without dimming your light

This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault.

Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available.

Listen to Sean on The Love Drive podcast and follow him @thelovedrive on Instagram and TikTok.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

We are back with a no-holds-barred Best of Dear Damona episode—because when it comes to texting mishaps, mixed signals, and dating curveballs, this one hits home every time.

In this candid conversation, Damona answers some of your juiciest dating dilemmas—from the accidental text that lands in the wrong inbox to what it really means when someone texts you “hey you” at 11:30 PM. She shares smart, compassionate advice on navigating confusing signals, staying grounded, and owning your truth in the dating game.

What you’ll learn:

• How to respond and recover when you send the wrong text to your date

• Whether it’s okay to ask for better photos—and how to do it playfully

• The real timeline for exclusivity (spoiler: you don’t have to rush)

• Why it’s okay to date multiple people—and how to know when to choose

• How to disclose chronic conditions or disabilities with confidence

• Why shared values matter more than shared hobbies

This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault.

Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available.

DM Damona your questions on Instagram @damonahoffman or text 424-246-6255 to be featured on a future episode.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Damona breaks down the 5 core dating “loops” that keep singles stuck and the step-by-step strategies that lead to lasting love.

With over 15 years of experience coaching thousands of daters, Damona shares how clarity, mindset, and follow-through can radically shift your dating outcomes. If you’ve been swiping without success, burning out on first dates, or unsure where to even begin, this episode offers a simple and strategic path forward.

What you’ll learn:

• The five most common dating loops and how to break them
• How to avoid burnout by dating with clarity and purpose
• Where to actually meet the right people (online and IRL)
• Why your dating mindset matters more than your profile

This is a special masterclass edition of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates archives.

Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available.

Want to go deeper? Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com

Join the Dating Accelerator Program

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Fan favorite, Dr. Orna Guralnik, renowned psychoanalyst and host of the hit Showtime series Couples Therapy, shares what decades of clinical work have taught her about love, connection, and unconscious patterns in relationships. In this conversation, Dr. Orna also opens up about the societal shifts reshaping modern intimacy, the difference between psychoanalysis and surface-level self-help, and why listening, real, curious listening, is a radical act in partnership.

What you’ll learn:

• How your unconscious motivations shape relationship patterns
• Why privilege must be acknowledged for real connection to happen
• How to create transformation in a partner without “fixing” them
• Why curiosity is the first step to emotional healing

This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault.

Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available.

Catch Dr. Orna in Couples Therapy (streaming now on Showtime)

Follow her @ornaguralnik
NYT Essay – “I’m a Couples Therapist. Something New Is Happening in Relationships”

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Nick Viall, TV personality and host of the hit podcast The Viall Files, gets real about modern dating—from DM slides to ghosting games—and why the story we tell ourselves about love might be holding us back. In this candid conversation, Nick reflects on his years in the Bachelor franchise, what finally made love stick, and the overlooked ways women can help men feel safe, seen, and emotionally available. 

Plus, in a special Dear Damona & Dear Nick segment, the two team up to answer your toughest love dilemmas—from long-distance moving logistics to mixed signals that never quite become dates.

What you’ll learn:

• How to slide into DMs without overthinking it
• Why the “how we met” story isn’t as important as we think
• What men wish women knew about emotional safety
• How to handle a situationship that keeps circling back

This episode is part of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates vault.

Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available.

Listen to Nick on The Viall Files podcast

Follow him on the socials @nickviall

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Former First Lady Michelle Obama and her brother Craig Robinson, co-hosts of the IMO Podcast, join Damona for a compelling conversation on navigating connection in the digital age. Together, they share insights into how they maintain strong family bonds across long distances and the role of technology in bridging that gap.

What You’ll Learn:

• How Michelle and Craig keep connected with loved ones despite busy schedules and miles apart

• The surprising benefits of texting vs. phone calls in sustaining relationships

• How to bring spontaneity back to phone conversations without overwhelming your schedule

• Why FaceTime and family Zoom calls became a lifeline during the pandemic—and how they continue to use them to stay close

• Practical tips for setting communication boundaries that promote genuine connection

This conversation isn’t just about tech—it's about purposefully using it to deepen the relationships that matter most.

Subscribe to get every new Dates & Mates episode as soon as it drops, and don’t miss Michelle Obama and Craig Robinson on the IMO Podcast, where they explore life, love, and everything in between with candor and warmth.

Follow Michelle Obama @michelleobama

Follow Craig Robinson @craigmalrob

More about the IMO Podcast

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Fan favorite, Jennifer Cook, bestselling author, and autism advocate shares her experience as the on-camera expert from the hit Netflix series Love on the Spectrum. In this conversation, Jennifer also opens up about her late-in-life autism diagnosis, the challenges of dating with a neurodivergent brain, and the surprising tools that can help anyone date with more clarity and compassion.

What you’ll learn:

• How neurodiverse and neurotypical daters alike can build intentional communication
• Practical tools for managing sensory overwhelm on a date
• The subtle power of “tell me more”
• Why preparation and presence are the keys to connection

This is the first episode of our Rewind Series, where we revisit some of the most powerful and timeless conversations from the Dates & Mates archives. 

Subscribe to get every rewind episode and our Spring special bonus episodes the minute they are available.

Catch Jennifer in the latest season of Love on the Spectrum (streaming now on Netflix)

Follow her @JenniferCook_Author

More at: JenniferCookAuthor.com 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

In this special Master Class episode, Damona explains the effect that text-based communication has had on dating today. But rather than thinking of it as us losing the art of communication, she proposes that we consider it as gaining another language and expanding our skills. Prepare to develop a communication code of conduct that will hopefully lead you to a deeper, more meaningful connection!

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Laura Day, New York Times bestselling author, shares the insights within her upcoming book, “The Prism: Seven Steps to Heal Your Past and Transform Your Future”. Her transformational tools will put you back in the driver's seat of your life and lead you to healthier relationships with others and yourself. Our Dear Damona question of the week:

• Where do you draw the line between being too picky and settling?

Pre-order your copy of Laura’s book,“The Prism: Seven Steps to Heal Your Past and Transform Your Future”, set to be released April 29th, by visiting lauraday.com/shop/

Follow Laura on Instagram @LauraDayIntuit 

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Damona shares a rare peek behind the curtain of one of her private coaching sessions, with the client’s permission of course! Hear firsthand how she teaches her clients to use their own intuition in dating and beyond. Plus you’ll get to see exactly how Damona uses her own intuition while coaching singles in love from how to tune in, what to look and listen for, and exercises to get started yourself. Whether you’ve been ignoring your gut or just want to sharpen your instincts, this episode is going to help you reconnect with one of your most powerful dating tools—you.

Interested in booking your own solo coaching session? Email Asst@DamonaHoffman.com or DM @damonahoffman on Instagram or Facebook!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Francesca Hogi, TED speaker and host of the Dear Franny podcast, introduces her new book, “How To Find True Love: Unlock Your Romantic Flow and Create Lasting Relationships.” Plus, she will break down her new definition of true love, dive deeper into the Fairy Tale Industrial Complex, explore her meet-cute mindset and so much more! Our Dear Damona question of the week:

• Dating apps keep feeding me the same old matches, so how do I meet someone IRL?

Grab your copy of Francesca’s book, “How to Find True Love: Unlock Romantic Flow and Create Lasting Relationships”, by visiting FrancescaHogi.com/Book

Follow Francesca on Instagram @DearFranny 

Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mentioned in this episode:

Book Your Breakthrough Boost today

DamonaHoffman.com/breakthrough

Sharing a new show from our friends at Higher Ground, hosted by Michelle Obama, called IMO. On IMO, Michelle and her big brother Craig Robinson bring candid perspectives to the everyday questions shaping our lives, relationships and the world around us. Each week, they’re joined by a guest to tackle real questions from real folks just like you offering practical advice, personal storytelling, and plenty of laughs. And a lot of their questions are about dating and relationships. Michelle and Craig share stories about being there for each other throughout their lives, from first crushes and fraught college years, to landing at the White House, to losing their mom. For six decades they’ve been each others’ most trusted counsel—and now, they want to be that counsel for you. In this episode, renowned life coach and podcaster Jay Shetty joins Michelle and Craig to puzzle through a listener's question about professional ambition and dating. The trio discuss money in relationships, finding balance between work and romance, and Michelle shares her advice for choosing a life partner. They ask: Is the pursuit of perfection—in work or dating—worth it? You can hear more episodes of IMO at https://lnk.to/imomichellecraigDM

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices