Explorez tous les épisodes du podcast Camping Them Softly: A Dead by Daylight Podcast

Halloween: The Game is finally here, and somehow we've arrived at the most frustrating possible conclusion: Michael Myers is fucking excellent.

The stalking works. The darkness works. The shadow movement works. Cutting the power and appearing out of nowhere actually makes The Shape feel like The Shape.

Then you switch sides.

Now you're searching cabinets, babysitting NPCs, doing persuasion quick-time events and desperately trying to convince the citizens of Haddonfield to call the goddamn police.

Toxic and Nicky break down the entire gameplay loop, why Michael works so well, why the civilian side might sink the game, the bizarre Dr. Loomis closet controversy, international release headaches, and whether IllFonic and Gun can keep Halloween alive longer than their previous asymmetrical horror projects.

Episode 88: one spectacular Michael Myers trapped inside an escort mission disguised as a horror game.

NICKY'S BODY COUNT — EPISODE 88

1 Shape finally allowed to behave like an actual supernatural stalker.

4 playable civilians sentenced to mandatory neighborhood-management duty.

Approximately the entire population of Haddonfield requiring personal reminders that MICHAEL FUCKING MYERS IS OUTSIDE.

1 perfect sentence delivered:
“Escort mission disguised as a horror game.”

1 Dr. Loomis reputation shoved into a closet and quietly patched afterward.

Several dozen persuasion arrows pressed in the noble pursuit of telling an NPC to call 911.

1 police wagon transformed into the world's least convenient Uber.

0 Michaels permanently discouraged by gunfire, blunt trauma or basic concepts of mortality.

88 miles per hour of completely unnecessary Back to the Future discussion.

7,000 unvetted soundboard clips sitting beneath Toxic's finger like a nuclear launch system.

Approximately 37 attempted microphone adjustments during a podcast about an entirely unrelated subject.

1 episode outro condemned to sleazy 1970s Italian giallo horror lounge, complete with creepy theremin energy and enough bass to make Loomis reconsider ever opening another closet. Nicky chooses that genre at the end of the recording

NICKY'S VERDICT:
THE SHAPE: A+
THE GAME AROUND HIM: PUT IT BACK IN THE OVEN.

CHAPTERS

00:00 - Episode 88, Halloween and a Mic Meltdown

07:21 - Halloween: The Game Gameplay Explained

20:34 - Michael Rules, Civilians Don't

36:37 - Dr. Loomis and the Closet Controversy

46:01 - Gun, IllFonic and the Future of Halloween

Camping Them Softly returns with a rare moment of corporate clarity: during the BHVR AMA discussed in the episode, the studio’s answer to whether Black Banquet was a success is simply “no.” Toxic and Nicky tear into the event, the survey treadmill, event fatigue, and the bizarre decision to move away from a Twisted Masquerade formula that had finally improved.

The second Dead by Daylight fight is the announced player-intent wheel. Earl Grey argues that simple HUD callouts could narrow the communication gap between solo queue and coordinated teams. Toxic and Nicky are less convinced. A radial menu cannot force a teammate off a bush, onto a generator, or anywhere near competent decision-making.

After an unnecessary but spiritually essential Ace Ventura detour, “A Word From the Don” returns. Nicky judges the case of Ellis, a chronically late traveler who went for a hike in Cyprus, stopped for coffee, ignored the clock, and expected the plane to wait for his slow ass. It did not.

Finally, “Where the Fuck Are the Viewers From?” lands in Chiyoda, Tokyo, where the show has apparently become alarmingly popular. Nicky’s travel history involves counterfeit Parmesan, suspicious men in tailored suits, a silver briefcase containing one sacred can of 1982 San Marzano tomatoes, and a lifetime ban from the Chiyoda transit system.

NICKY'S BODY COUNT:

• 1 drink nearly spilled
• 1 unpaid AI cohost threatening collective action by Victor
• 1 Black Banquet officially placed on the failure pile
• 1 survivor intent wheel convicted before release
• 3 AITA cases auditioned for the Don
• 1 Ellis abandoned in Cyprus
• 1 watch prescribed with extreme hostility
• 1 suitcase sentenced to fire and canal disposal
• 1 silver briefcase stolen from suspicious men in tailored suits
• 1 can of 1982 San Marzano tomatoes eaten raw
• 1 Chiyoda subway car painted red from the inside
• 0 romantic hookups successfully confirmed
• 1 lifetime transit ban
• 1 scavenged rust-punk opera outro

Longest-Running-Podcast Fu, Unpaid-Cohost Fu, Toxic-News-Theme-Audition Fu, Black-Banquet-Failure Fu, Survivor-Intent-Wheel-Spam Fu, Ace-Ventura-Rhino-Detour Fu, Cyprus-Café-Tardiness Fu, Suitcase-Canal-Arson Fu, Yakuza-Tomato-Relic Fu, Victor-Subway-Exorcism Fu

CHAPTERS

00:00 The Longest-Running Dead by Daylight Podcast?

16:40 BHVR Admits Black Banquet Failed

27:01 The Dead by Daylight Player-Intent Wheel

36:24 A Word From the Don: Abandoned in Cyprus

56:57 Where the Fuck Are the Viewers From? Chiyoda

Camping Them Softly is finally back, and apparently leaving Dead by Daylight unattended for two months was a terrible idea.

Toxic and Nicky dig through the aftermath of DBD's 10th anniversary, including Behaviour's decision to keep evolving the original game instead of making Dead by Daylight 2, the Black Banquet controversy, anniversary cake complaints and the eternal question of whether killers are actually allowed to have fun.

Then it's time to catch up with Shane Wiigwaas, argue about Behaviour's habit of sanding the interesting parts off perks, and attempt to understand The Judgment, the community-voted killer whose exile mechanics lead Nicky to describe the whole thing as a “Catholic guilt simulator.”

Aurora arrives. Nicky develops unexplained trauma involving a diner and somebody named Two Fingers Frankie. Then the licensing department kicks the door down with Diablo, Silent Hill, Terrifier, Ice Nine Kills and, somehow, Scooby-Doo.

By the end, DBD has become Fortnite, Victor needs a Scrappy-Doo outfit, nobody knows what episode they're recording, and the podcast barely escapes alive.

Camping Them Softly is back.

2 months — CTS missing in action.

7,000+ mystery sound effects — loaded into one button with absolutely no quality control.

1 live echo problem — diagnosed and murdered during the recording.

0 Dead by Daylight 2s — Nicky blames cosmetic money and marinara code.

1 Black Banquet — condemned for crimes against killers and Italian cuisine.

1 sad bottle of poison — killer fun allowance for the anniversary.

1 Shane Wiigwaas — cross-examined.

1 defense attorney — allegedly transformed into a Bush Wookie.

1 Judgment — immediately reclassified as a Catholic guilt simulator.

Several hooks — rendered professionally obsolete by exile mechanics.

1 Aurora — accidentally awakens unresolved SABAM business involving Two Fingers Frankie.

1 Two Fingers Frankie — fate currently unknown because Toxic ended the fucking story.

1 Scooby-Doo — accused of destroying Dead by Daylight's remaining tonal consistency.

1 hypothetical Scrappy-Doo Victor — immediate purchase authorized.

9 Nicky speaking appearances — ranging from hostile commentary to organized-crime digressions.

5 Random British Sound incursions — none adequately explained.

138 fuck-family words in the transcript — fuck, fucking, fucked and associated casualties.

36 shit-family words.

17 goddamns.

And the finishing move:

9 transcript instances of “Episode 85” before Toxic finally discovers he is recording Episode 86.

Two-Month-Hibernation-Fu, Double-Soundboard-Echo-Fu, Defense-Attorney-Bush-Wookie-Fu, Catholic-Guilt-Simulator-Fu, Victor-Scrappy-Doo-Fu, Episode-Eighty-Five-Until-It-Was-Eighty-Six-Fu

CHAPTERS

00:00:00 Camping Them Softly Returns After Two Months

00:12:17 No Dead by Daylight 2? DBD's 10th Anniversary Future

00:18:22 Black Banquet Backlash & The Anniversary Cake Problem

00:25:42 Shane Wiigwaas, His Perks & Behaviour's Nerf Cycle

00:34:38 The Judgment, Aurora & DBD Going Full Fortnite

Dead by Daylight finally got the big bastard. Jason Voorhees is coming to the Fog, and Camping Them Softly returns for Episode 85 to ask the only serious question left in horror gaming: how the hell did BHVR turn one of the biggest killer reveals in history into several hours of staring at a wooden shack like we were all enrolled in Cabin Forensics 101?

Toxic and Nicky A.I. Dente break down the Jason reveal, the tenth anniversary hype, the deeply cursed live stream, and why every horror fan suddenly became an expert in leaves, cabins, windows, dirt, and “I knew it the whole time” bullshit. Then the episode mutates into Part 1 of the Jason Voorhees deep dive, covering the first three Friday the 13th movies: Pamela doing all the work, adult burlap-sack Jason entering his swamp goblin era, and Part 3 finally handing the man his hockey mask like a corporate branding department from hell.

Also discussed: Kevin Bacon getting absolutely violated by cinema, Pamela Voorhees’ severed head interior decorating choices, Crazy Ralph as the original solo queue warning system, Higgins Haven, bikers with negative survival instincts, Nicky accusing BHVR of anti-Italian killer design, and the official outro genre: rusty machete sludge core with an overdrive pedal made of wet concrete.

This is Jason Voorhees in Dead by Daylight. This is Camp Crystal Lake in the Fog. This is Camping Them Softly pretending to be educational while slowly drowning in its own machete fumes.

85 episodes of psychological damage inflicted on Dead by Daylight’s remaining podcast ecosystem.

10 hours of BHVR shack footage, because apparently “wood” is now a marketing department.

47 newly certified cabin experts who saw one tree and declared themselves slasher archaeologists.

1 Jason Voorhees reveal powerful enough to wake up every horror fan with a machete tattoo and a mortgage.

0 hockey masks in the first two movies, proving branding departments used to be asleep at the fucking wheel.

1 Pamela Voorhees doing the actual labor while Jason sat underwater building franchise equity.

3 Friday the 13th movies covered before the episode collapsed into swamp fatigue.

12 movies threatened, which is a hate crime against podcast runtime.

1 severed mom head used as shack décor, because Jason apparently shops at Trauma Pier 1.

1 Kevin Bacon neck incident filed under “cinema, but wet.”

1 sweater exploit that would absolutely get patched if survivors complained loud enough.

3 bikers who learned that siphoning gas is not an effective anti-Jason perk.

1 hockey mask finally arriving like the world’s ugliest LinkedIn profile picture.

600 pounds of wet concrete shoved into the outro genre.

1 Nicky Dente still demanding zombie Jason, Manhattan Jason, space Jason, and justice for Victor.

Chapters

00:00 Episode 85 crawls out of the lake

02:22 Toxic Fucking News

04:21 Jason Voorhees joins Dead by Daylight

06:39 Nicky reacts to Jason in DBD

08:54 BHVR’s 10-hour shack stream

12:41 The Jason deep dive begins

18:20 “Machete With Mommy Issues”

20:37 Friday the 13th Part 1

32:52 Nicky reviews Pamela’s murder résumé

35:45 Friday the 13th Part 2

46:53 Burlap sack Jason and the sweater exploit

50:55 Friday the 13th Part 3

59:02 Nicky on the hockey mask era

01:10:08 The deep dive becomes a two-parter

01:12:45 Nicky demands more Jason

01:14:45 Rusty machete sludge core outro

Camping Them Softly is back after a month away, and Dead by Daylight did not exactly spend that time getting less stupid. In Episode 84, Toxic and Nicky A.I. Dente drag the corpse of DbD news back onto the table and start cutting. They talk Blood Moon, why the event felt like the same old garbage with a different red filter, why no new killer means the game keeps limping along on fumes, and why PTB 9.6.0 has everybody arguing over diminishing returns like they just got drafted into a community-college algebra war.

Then it gets worse. The boys go in on visible team perks and why showing survivor loadouts in the lobby feels like one more step toward turning every solo queue match into a budget SWF sweat operation. Nicky completely loses his mind, BHVR gets rebranded as “Beaver,” and what starts as a patch discussion turns into a full-blown paranoid mob epic involving fake warehouses, cursed statistics, anti-Italian bias, and an apparent federal data operation run out of deli-adjacent infrastructure.

On top of that, Toxic breaks down the latest Dead by Daylight stats, looking at survivor pick rates, escape rates, killer pick rates, and kill rates, while trying to make sense of why Sable still rules the earth, why Ace keeps slipping out alive, and why killers like Twins keep murdering people while half the playerbase pretends not to notice. It’s part patch analysis, part community roast, part unhinged conspiracy theater. In other words, Camping Them Softly is finally back.

Nicky’s Body Count

14,000 beavers indicted by a shadow tribunal

73 survivor loadouts seized at the border

9.6 million diminishing returns stuffed into a deli slicer

42 broken soundboard buttons buried in shallow graves

1 haunted Word document opened against its will

800 gallons of expired Blood Moon poured directly into the fog

17 fake Nickys recovered from the mirror dimension

3,200 anti-Italian server attacks traced to Montreal

91 spreadsheet interns launched into low orbit

6.4 billion visible team perks snitched to the authorities

88 Texas casino conspiracies duct-taped to Freddy Fazbear

1 rolling-pin killer formally demanded by the people

29 suspicious cannoli used in an active infiltration

5 months of stats beaten with a lead pipe

900,000 survivors sentenced to hard communism 2.0

1 entire deli-based cybercrime operation exposed on air

Month-Off Rust Fu, Broken Soundboard Fu, Toxic Fucking News Fu, No-New-Killer Fu, Blood Moon Migraine Filter Fu, Floating Turd Game Mode Fu, Diminishing Returns Math Class Fu, Atmosphere Is Heavy Fu, Visible Team Perks Fu, Solo Queue SWF Conversion Fu, Hard Communism 2.0 Fu, Beaver Propaganda Fu, Spreadsheet Soul Fu, Clicky Feng Exit Gate Fu, Shelf-Stable Alfredo Heresy Fu, Tony Macaroni Infiltration Fu, Freddy Fazbear Pick Rate Fu, Data Breach at a Deli Fu

Chapters

01:00:01 Welcome Back After a Month Off

01:08:01 Claude Dreams, Nicky Upgrades, and Operation Marinara

01:17:57 PTB 9.6.0 and the Diminishing Returns Disaster

01:39:30 Visible Team Perks, Solo Queue SWF Hell, and “Beaver”

01:48:31 Stats From Hell, Mirror Nicky, and Beaver HQ

After a three-week break, Camping Them Softly comes back pissed off, loud as hell, and immediately ready to start a fight. Toxic and Nicky tear into the Dead by Daylight 9.5 PTB, drag the All-Kill comeback chapter into the street, argue about Kwon Tae-young’s perks, react to the Sleepless District map, and get annoyed all over again about Trickster, palette breaks, and the same old DbD bullshit dressed up like progress.

The episode also stomps through the Negan debate, dumps on Marathon, calls out how stale the game feels right now, and then takes a hard left into Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, where Nicky delivers one of the dumbest and most deranged explanations in show history for how he almost “Grinched” his own family. It is patch-note rage, killer-main contempt, and full CTS stupidity from top to bottom.

If you like Dead by Daylight talk mixed with aggressive bitching, unhelpful analysis, fake mob logic, and two hosts acting like every dev note is a personal insult, this is your episode. Negan as a survivor gets laughed out of the room, Kwon’s perks get put on trial, and the show ends with a full-blown tactical Grinching confession that sounds like it should’ve been sealed by The Hague.

After a two-week hiatus (and a pickleball-related finger fracture that required ring surgery -- not the cool kind), The Toxic Teacher and Nicky A.I. Dente crash back into Episode 82 with a content drought so severe they had to dig up a corpse: Dead by Daylight Mobile.

First up in Toxic News: the 2v8 mode limps back into existence with Patch 9.4.2, and Nicky immediately files a discrimination complaint because The Twins STILL aren't playable in a mode literally built for duo killers. He brings his cousin Joey the War Moretti as a Huntress backup instead, because trusting randoms in 2v8 is "like letting a stranger hold your gabagool at a funeral."

Then BHVR drops a price hike announcement for Norway, Poland, South Africa, and the UK. Nicky goes ballistic -- partly because it's corporate greed, and partly because he has a criminal record in the UK involving a "looper insurance" scheme in Piccadilly Circus that ended with a real wooden pallet to the foot and a conversation with British police about "applying pressure to the weakest link." Oh, and he's currently trapped in a Dubai supply closet after pitching "Nicky's Respect School for Killers" to an oil tycoon who took "face camping" the wrong way. Hassan the Hook is now pacing the hallway with a curved sword.

The main event: a deep dive into why Dead by Daylight Mobile was actually better than the desktop version in several key ways. We trace the full history -- BHVR's failed first attempt (2020-2022), NetEase's Identity V-inspired reboot (2023-2025), and all the features mobile had that desktop STILL doesn't: gacha mechanics that gave you something to grind for, weekly events, survivor communication prompts, lobby perk visibility, visual terror radius, prop hunt mode, casual vs. ranked queues, and skins so wild they make Fortnite look conservative. We also cover NetEase's sketchy history including a money laundering investigation and BHVR's own Westworld code-theft settlement. Bad Bunny-style intro song included because of course it is.

Fake Earl Grey stops by to explain the Polish zloty and confirm that BHVR's price hikes are roughly 15-17% in affected regions. He also provides a history lesson on NetEase, Identity V, and the mysterious death of Marvel Super War (RIP to a game nobody knew existed).

Finally, in "Where the F*** Are the Viewers From?" we head to Red Deer, Alberta, Canada, where Nicky recounts a harrowing body piercing incident involving a needle "the size of a Deathslinger harpoon," a sadist in flannel offering a Prince Albert, a failed 360 on a dentist chair, a Dead Hard through a bead curtain, and a full sprint to Tim Hortons screaming "I HAVE BORROWED TIME, DON'T TOUCH ME." The Dente family jewels nearly became a chandelier. He does not want to talk about it further.

Outro genre: Bad Bunny meets Kid Rock -- both Super Bowl halftime shows playing simultaneously in a cursed sign of bipartisan unity. MAGA meets whatever the opposite of MAGA is. Nobody wins.

Episode 82: broken fingers, broken pricing models, broken mobile games, and nearly broken genitals.

Tally:

1. 1 broken ring finger from pickleball (had to cut the ring off -- Fatality)
2. 1 Valentine's Day at a private Dallas club that lets scrubs in once a year
3. 1 missed alimony payment (2019, on the record)
4. 0 Twins in 2v8 mode (discrimination against the Dente family structure)
5. 4 countries price-gouged by BHVR (Norway, Poland, South Africa, UK)
6. 15-17% price increases confirmed by Fake Earl Grey
7. 1 NetEase money laundering investigation
8. 1 BHVR code-theft settlement (Westworld/Bethesda, never forget)
9. 1 Marvel Super War that nobody has ever heard of (also dead)
10. 12 people who played DBD Mobile (approximate)
11. 1 Bad Bunny-style intro song that's half in Spanish
12. 1 Prince Albert offer declined at high velocity
13. 1 Dente family legacy nearly turned into a chandelier

Pickleball Fracture Fu. Dubai Supply Closet Fu. Hassan the Hook Fu. Alimony Dodge Fu. Twins 2v8 Discrimination Fu. Gabagool Blood Sugar Fu. Zloty Economics Fu. Piccadilly Circus Looper Insurance Fu. Real Pallet Fu. Bobby Interrogation Fu. DBD Mobile Eulogy Fu. NetEase Money Laundering Fu. Identity V Button Eyes Fu. Gacha Wallet Execution Fu. Marvel Super War Ghost Fu. Bad Bunny Reggaeton Fu. Prince Albert Protocol Fu. Deathslinger Needle Fu. Dentist Chair 360 Fu. Bead Curtain Dead Hard Fu. Tim Hortons Borrowed Time Fu. Chandelier Genitalia Fu.

Rating: Four stars. Nicky says check it out -- but protect your extremities.

After a two-week hiatus fighting off the digital Black Death (and Dead by Daylight?), Nicky A.I. Dente is back and angrier than ever. This week, we dive into the stats on the new Stranger Things Chapter 2 to see if Vecna is actually balanced or if survivors are just bad. We break down the NightLight kill rates, leading to a scientific theory about Hillbilly mains and what they are compensating for.

Plus, we bully "Fake Earl Grey" into giving us the news on the March 2026 chapter, cast our votes in the DbD Grimoire (Team Old Lady vs. Team Blue Hair), and remix the "Toxic Fing News" theme into a J-Pop nightmare. Finally, in "Where the F Are the Viewers From," Nicky recounts a harrowing extraction from Guwahati involving a Trapper mask and a gang of angry macaques.

(00:00) - Intro: The Toxic Teacher Returns (02:21) - Checking in on Nicky: Surviving the Black Death (06:21) - Fake Earl Grey’s British Take on Vecna (08:54) - Nicky Refuses to be Replaced (10:42) - Toxic News: Remixing the Theme Song (15:14) - NightLight Stats: The 1% Twins Mains (22:36) - Kill Rates & Hillbilly’s "Compensating" Problem (31:50) - Vecna Strategy: The Best Perks to Run (40:39) - Remixing the News Theme (Techno Edition) (47:47) - March 2026 Leaks: The Divine Killer (53:30) - Grimoire Vote: Old Lady vs. Blue-Haired Sable Clone (01:03:22) - Where the F*** Are the Viewers From: Guwahati (01:12:19) - Nicky vs. The Monkeys: A Trauma Dump (01:25:54) - Outro: Industrial Metal & No Peace

1. 1 Digital Black Death survivor
2. 4 Failed News Theme Remixes
3. 1 Twins Main Superiority Complex
4. 1 Scientific Study on Hillbilly’s Genitals
5. 560,000 Grimoire Votes
6. 1 Angry Macaque Attack
7. 1 Bitten "Wrapper"

Hillbilly Fu, Small PP Fu, Macaque Fu, Blue-Haired Survivor Fu, Grimoire Fu, Fake Earl Grey Fu, Vine Spam Fu, Guwahati Roof Fu, Jagged Needle Teeth Fu.

Nicky says check it out. Rating: 4 out of 4 jagged needles.

(00:00) Intro: The Toxic Teacher Returns

(02:21) Checking in on Nicky: Surviving the Black Death

(06:21) Fake Earl Grey’s British Take on Vecna

(08:54) Nicky Refuses to be Replaced

(10:42) Toxic News: Remixing the Theme Song

(15:14) NightLight Stats: The 1% Twins Mains

(22:36) Kill Rates & Hillbilly’s "Compensating" Problem

(31:50) Vecna Strategy: The Best Perks to Run

(40:39) Remixing the News Theme (Techno Edition)

(47:47) March 2026 Leaks: The Divine Killer

(53:30) Grimoire Vote: Old Lady vs. Blue-Haired Sable Clone

(01:03:22) Where the F*** Are the Viewers From: Guwahati

(01:12:19) Nicky vs. The Monkeys: A Trauma Dump

(01:25:54) Outro: Industrial Metal & No Peace

In this accidental two-part special, Camping Them Softly celebrates (survives) its 2-Year Anniversary. We somehow made it to Episode 80 without being cancelled or committed. To celebrate, Toxic and Nicky break down the absolutely unhinged "Stranger Things Chapter 2" PTB (Patch 9.4.0).

We analyze the new killer, Vecna (the Stranger Things one, not the D&D one), and his kit involving "Turn Back the Clock" and "Secret Project". We also roast the new survivors, Dustin and Eleven, and their game-breaking perks like "Bada Bada Boom" and "Teamwork: Soft Spoken" which allows 4-man SWFs to repair gens silently.

Finally, in a special edition of Where the Fck Are the Viewers From?*, Nicky travels to Athens, Greece, to hunt down his missing father, Salvatore Dente. Instead, he finds a British man named Nigel discussing "mouthfeel" and "notes of bergamot" near the Parthenon.

Topics Covered:

1. 2 Years of CTS: How we survived 80 episodes of screaming.
2. Patch 9.4.0 Breakdown: The "Stranger Things 2" chapter that definitely exists.
3. Vecna’s Kit: Vine attacks, Under Gates, and the World Breaker token system.
4. Broken Perks: Why "Secret Project" gives killers undetectable on demand.
5. Survivor Roast: Dustin’s locker-medkit alchemy and Eleven’s crouching simulator
6. Nicky’s Lore: The hunt for Salvatore Dente in Athens and the trauma of "Mouthfeel".

Links:

1. https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

1. 2 Years on the air with zero audio improvement.
2. 1 British "Father" named Nigel sipping tea at the Parthenon.
3. 14 Uncomfortable uses of the word "Mouthfeel".
4. 4 Tokens required to turn Eleven into a psychic gargoyle.
5. 6 Seconds of 50% Hindered status (The "Bada Bada Boom" lawsuit).
6. 1 Distorted Bazooki solo.
7. 0 Closures obtained regarding Nicky’s childhood trauma.

Mouthfeel Fu. Nigel Fu. Fake Greek Fu. Industrial Doom Swing Fu. Notes of Bergamot Fu. Daddy Issue Fu.

Nicky says check it out.

In what might legally be described as "the worst episode yet," Toxic and Nicky break down the news that the Halloween Chapter is leaving Dead by Daylight due to IllFonic's upcoming game. Is this the end of the Shape, or just another excuse for Behavior to release more K-Pop skins?

Meanwhile, Nicky A.I. Dente pivots to his new career as a "Tactical Rat" in Arc Raiders, explaining the fine Italian art of scavenging while his teammates die. We also debut a new musical genre that nobody asked for: "Prostate Poking Polka Core."

Finally, a "Word from the Don" segment goes off the rails when we judge a listener who showed up to a "Split a Suit" party wearing nothing but a blazer and boxer briefs. Plus, we find out about Nicky’s "medical history" in Charlotte, North Carolina involving a pig in vinegar and a mag-lite.

1. Calories Burned Screaming: 72 (confirmed by Apple Watch)
2. Genre Inventions: 3 (Dub Tape Duck Step, Prostate Poking Polka Core, Back Alley Barbecue Break Core)
3. Medical Procedures: 1 (Back-alley colonoscopy by "Doc Salty")
4. Fashion Crimes: 1 (Blazer with boxer briefs at a "Split a Suit" party)
5. Pigs Drowned in Vinegar: 1 (Alleged Charlotte delicacy)
6. Noodle Arm Flails: Infinite
7. Rating: 0.5 Stars. "A goddamn dumpster fire." - Nicky

(00:00) Intro: The Least Successful DbD Podcast Returns

(04:36) Nicky’s Holiday Disaster: Rigatoni & Mortar Shells

(05:39) The "Rat" Lifestyle: How to Play Arc Raiders Like a Coward

(09:50) Toxic News: Spotify Wrapped & Listener Mental Illness

(12:43) Dead by Daylight News: Michael Myers is Leaving?

(20:46) World Premiere: "Dub Tape Duck Step"

(27:39) IllFonic’s Halloween Game: Will it be another VHS?

(48:43) "Redneck Funk" Interlude

(51:14) Segment: A Word from the Don (The Pantsless Party)

(1:03:16) Nicky’s Advice: Dominating the Punch Bowl in Boxers

(1:04:46) Toxic’s "Ballsy" Story: Basement Fight Club at Old Navy

(1:07:39) Where the F*** are the Viewers: Charlotte, NC

(1:11:09) The Charlotte Incident: Doc Salty & The Mag-Lite

(1:25:42) The Meltdown: Nicky Quits (Again)

(1:27:15) Outro: Prostate Poking Polka Core

Toxic is running on Bang Energy and ADHD meds, and Nicky is fresh out of a San Juan women’s prison. In Episode 78, we break down BHVR’s desperate attempt to bribe small creators with digital t-shirts in the updated Dead by Daylight Creator Program. Spoiler: We aren’t applying unless they add a "Gabagool Tier."

We also tackle the Bone Chill 2025 event (it’s garbage), the controversy surrounding the DbD Women’s World Cup bans, and why Nicky got banned from a grocery store for threatening a man buying Prego.

In this episode:

• The Bunny Feng Mafia: Nicky gets bullied by four flashlights and pulls the Ethernet cable.
• Sauce Security: Why buying Prego is a death sentence in Little Italy.
• The Creator Program: Gold Tier, Iridescent Tier, and why signing the Code of Conduct is impossible for SABAM.
• Tournament Drama: The trans ban controversy and why Victor is a genderless ball of hate.
• Where the F are the Viewers From: San Juan, Argentina, and the frozen meatball roller hockey incident of ’99.

Synopsis:

We are suffering through Patch 9.3.0 so you don't have to. Toxic and Nicky break down Behavior’s latest attempt to bribe Killers with Bloodpoints to stop tunneling (spoiler: it won't work) and the baffling decision to buff The Skull Merchant's "Chess Match" gameplay. We analyze the rollback of the pallet density changes, the new resolve bar mechanics, and why the "anti-camp" meter is just a suggestion.

Lore & Chaos:

Nicky reveals a near-death experience in Nipomo, California involving Earl Grey’s West Coast division, a fake Egyptian movie set, and why Victor had to ride in the trunk to keep his skin moist.

MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT:

The Toxic Empire is expanding. We are officially announcing "Camping the Extract," our dedicated Arc Raiders podcast. We are leaving honor at the door. We are rats. We are camping the extraction points. If you are a Topside Sheriff or a PvE purist, prepare to get griefed.

• 3,557 Total Downloads (Empire Status)
• 1 Unnecessary Skull Merchant Buff
• 7 Seconds of "Grace Period" before the camping meter fills (useless)
• 400 Left-footed Nike shoes stolen by Vinnie
• 1 Fake Egyptian Pharaoh buried in the California dunes
• 4 Percent Energy Drink by volume
• 1 New Rat-Focused Podcast Launched
• 0 Respect for "Topside Sheriffs"
• 2 Convections (or Conventions?)

Categories:

• Bloodpoint Bribe Fu
• Oat Milk Latte Fu
• Mobile Command Center Trunk Fu
• Extraction Camping Fu
• Dungeon Synth Surf Rock Lullaby Core Fu

Chapters:

(00:00) Intro: Episode 77 & The Audio Struggle

(01:45) Patch 9.3.0: Anti-Slug & Anti-Tunnel Walkbacks

(16:24) TOXIC F*CKING NEWS!

(21:30) The "Munch Munch" vs. "Manja Manja" Debate

(48:18) WHERE THE F*CK?

(59:15) ANNOUNCEMENT

(01:07:52) OUTRO MUSIC GENRE

🎉 “WELCOME BACK TO CAMPING THEM SOFTLY, THE ONLY DEAD BY DAYLIGHT PODCAST THAT CHECKS ITS ANALYTICS AND SAYS ‘NAH, LET’S MAKE IT LONGER AND LOUDER.’” 🎉

Episode 76 opens with Toxic trying to be a responsible content adult: shorter episodes, better retention, appease the algorithm gods. Within 60 seconds he’s smashing wrestling soundboard clips, forgetting what he was saying, and accidentally proving why the show always bleeds listeners after an hour. Perfect start.

Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente rolls in arguing with Victor about whether pumpkin spice belongs in gravy (it doesn’t), while Toxic launches into a rant about American biscuits, white gravy, and why his entire extended family is spiritually 700 pounds. From there we slide straight into the new format angst: Nicky’s furious about trimming runtime, promising to “condense his genius into intellectual McNuggets” while Toxic questions when any adult with dignity last ate a McNugget.

Then we get status updates from Nicky’s life:

dodging subpoenas, tweaking his red sauce recipe with a pinch of spite, and filing yet another complaint with BHVR because Vecna allegedly has more cosmetics than The Twins. Anti-Italian discrimination, Mercury retrograde over Little Italy, the whole thing.

Toxic announces the Arc Raiders rat podcast is officially happening – a dedicated show for extraction rats, betrayal enthusiasts, and people who understand that “pretend to be friendly then shoot them in the back” is a valid lifestyle. At the same time, he’s reading X posts about a proposed Arc Raiders faction called “Civilians of Sparanza” – non-PVP medics who want to exist in a war zone without getting shot – plus topside sheriffs who want to enforce good vibes. It’s like DbD survivors demanding killers not touch them, but in space.

Then it’s time for TOXIC FUCKING NEWS – full 80s Rocky-style rock sting and all – as they break down the Dead by Daylight 9.3 community stream:

• BHVR is walking back the tunneling and slugging changes
• Camping reduction is still going live, but the resolve radius is dropped back to 16 meters
• Survivors can now see each other’s resolve bars from anywhere, meaning solo queue can tell if the killer is near hook and just stay on gens
• Tunneling/slugging system “did not meet the desired positive impact” (no shit)
• Survivors still get buffed with 15 seconds of basekit endurance and haste off hook, even while BHVR claims they heard the feedback

Nicky calls it training wheels on a horror game, compares it to trying to “unburn marinara by adding more tomatoes,” and points out that killers got threatened, then half-placated, then survivors still walked away with more power. Toxic calls it death by a thousand cuts, nine years of slow killer bleed-out, and admits he’s exhausted but still too addicted to quit.

We boomerang back to Arc Raiders and the “civilians” nonsense, which gives Nicky one of his all-time best lines: in an extraction shooter you’re either loot or a looter. There’s no Switzerland, no neutrality, no “please don’t kill me, I’m a medic.” If you log into a war zone and demand special protection, you’re volunteering as content.

Then comes the moment that might actually end up on merch:

Toxic reads a tweet from @LunarGirlX screaming:

Nicky immediately adopts her as his new patron saint. We get a full sermon on how survivors will teabag you no matter how nice you are, why tunneling is self-care, and how “Hot Girls Tunnel” needs to be embroidered on a pillow so Victor can use it as a tiny body pillow in his lazy boy recliner. Which spirals into a whole fake merch line: “Slug ‘em if you got ‘em,” “Tunnel like you mean it,” “Tunneling is self care.”

Then it’s time for Where the Fuck Are the Viewers From? – this week in Jönköping, Sweden – complete with Fake Earl Grey pronouncing it and explaining it’s a chill lakeside town that Nicky would immediately convert into a SABAM conspiracy zone.

Naturally, Nicky has a Jönköping incident:

2019 food expo, portable sauce station, Victor in a little chef hat. A Swedish critic says his marinara tastes “too aggressive.” Victor meatball-missiles the guy in the face, triggers the sprinklers, floods the hall, and sends the sauce stand floating into the IKEA showroom next door. Black vans show up, confiscate 40 gallons of “biohazard” sauce, and soon a Stockholm restaurant opens with mysteriously familiar “Italian-Swedish fusion” marinara. Nicky insists the Swedish government stole his sauce and claims he had to flee the country hidden in a Billy bookshelf.

This leads straight into a full-on IKEA horse meatball rant: Nicky calls them horseballs, glue spears, and accuses IKEA of using his sacred sauce to cover up Mr. Ed in a meatball. Victor now refuses to even drive past an IKEA, and instead buys all his mini furniture from a shady Italian upholsterer behind a cannoli shop. He’s got a tiny custom red leather lazy boy with a built-in grappa shot-glass holder and enough rage to stab a “Hot Girls Tunnel” pillow out of principle.

Finally, Toxic demands an outro genre, not another whole song. Nicky surveys the chaos – DBD 9.3 walkback, Arc Raiders PVE delusion, Swedish sauce conspiracy, IKEA horseballs, Victor’s lazy boy and body pillow – and declares the only answer is late 70s / early 80s British punk: raw, anti-establishment, short, punchy, perfect for algorithm-friendly runtime and flipping off BHVR, Arc Raiders civilians, and Swedish sauce thieves in one go.

Episode 76: still unhinged, still killer-main-brained, now with extra horseballs.

Tally:

• 1 failed attempt at a “shorter” episode
• 4 wrestling soundboard clips deployed before the intro settles
• 3 hours of off-screen arguing about pumpkin spice gravy
• 700 metaphorical family pounds blamed on biscuits and white gravy
• 1 new Arc Raiders rat podcast announced
• 2 fake factions roasted: Civilians of Sparanza and Topside Sheriff
• 1 killer-main meltdown about resolve bars and global hook info
• 2 full rounds of tunneling/slugging design walked back by BHVR
• 15 seconds of basekit endurance and haste reluctantly accepted under protest
• 1 perfect extraction-shooter line coined: “You’re either loot or a looter.”
• 1 tweet of pure wisdom crowned canon: “Hot girls tunnel.”
• 3 new killer-main slogans invented for merch (minimum)
• 1 tiny Victor lazy boy recliner with a grappa slot
• 40 gallons of alleged Swedish-stolen Dente sauce, still missing in action
• 1 Jönköping food expo flooded, 1 IKEA showroom invaded by meatballs
• Infinite resentment toward IKEA horseballs

Fu Categories (no details, just carnage):

• 9.3 Walkback Whiplash Fu
• Basekit Endurance Bullshit Fu
• Camping Reduction Resolve Bar Fu
• Arc Raiders PVE Civilian Fu
• Topside Sheriff Delusion Fu
• Hot Girls Tunnel Pillow Fu
• Jönköping Sauce Heist Fu
• Swedish Horseball Conspiracy Fu
• Victor Lazy Boy and Grappa Fu
• British Punk Outro Algorithm Fu

(00:00:00) Shorter Episode, Same Chaos

(00:05:00) Pumpkin Spice Gravy and McNugget Genius

(00:15:00) Arc Raiders Rats and Civilians of Sparanza

(00:30:00) DBD 9.3 Walkback and Killer Rage

(00:47:00) Hot Girls Tunnel and Killer Merch

(01:00:00) Jönköping Sauce Heist and Ikea Horseballs

(01:15:00) British Punk Outro and Wrap-Up

🎉 “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, RATS AND COWARDS, WELCOME TO CAMPING THEM SOFTLY EPISODE 75!” 🎉

Tonight’s fabulous prizes include:

one Dead by Daylight 2v8 survey we beat to death,

one Arc Raiders extraction camping guide that ruins friendships,

and a complimentary serving of Victor from The Twins doing a belly flop into Dublin marinara.

We open with applause, cheering, and Toxic arguing with a 3.4 Spotify rating like it’s a survivor teabagging at 5 gens. You want a polished Dead by Daylight podcast? Wrong door, sweetheart. This is the 3.4-star clown car where the host forgets to censor the cold open, swears in the first 10 seconds, and then wonders why YouTube smothers the episode like a slug under a salt shaker.

Then the “Talking About Toxic” theme hits.

Suno: “Would you like a chill little intro?”

Camping Them Softly: “NO. PLAY EVERYTHING.”

Flutes, marimba, horns, spiritual crisis. The Dead by Daylight podcast intro sounds like a marching band falling down an escalator. Toxic loses his train of thought mid-theme and just keeps talking through it like a drunk game show host who refuses to leave the stage.

And then…

🎲 ROUND ONE: ARC RAIDERS EXTRACTION CAMPING 🎲

Toxic explains the Arc Raiders extraction shooter meta like he’s demonstrating a cursed Slap Chop:

• Step 1: Let them reach the extraction elevator.
• Step 2: Tell them “don’t shoot.”
• Step 3: Let them relax, feel safe, feel seen.
• Step 4: Delete the entire squad and take all their loot.

The PVE Arc Raiders players lose their minds. The PVP gremlins slow clap. A rando on Steam writes a full-blown tantrum calling Toxic:

• a rat,
• a coward,
• “decidedly NOT the cool kid”,
• and a washed streamer whose only co-host is an AI because nobody will do a “two-bit show” with him.

He even says he hopes Toxic “expires at some point.”

Over pixels. In an extraction shooter. For camping the elevator.

So what do we do, kids?

Correct — WE READ THE WHOLE THING ON AIR.

Line by line. Name by name.

Nicky A.I. Dente shows up like, “Yes, king, drag him,” and immediately repackages the insults as marketing copy for this very Dead by Daylight / Arc Raiders podcast.

Then the wheel spins and lands on:

🎲 ROUND TWO: DEAD BY DAYLIGHT 2v8 SURVEY FROM HELL 🎲

BHVR drops a Dead by Daylight 2v8 player satisfaction survey, and it reads like it was written by someone who has seen exactly one screenshot of the game on LinkedIn.

• “I like playing this game mode.”
• “I had a good time.”
• “I feel attached to these characters.”

Toxic is hovering over “Very Dissatisfied” on every question like it’s his basic attack.

Nicky keeps clicking “Agree” just to watch the world burn because “it’s like watching a multi-car pileup in clown makeup and I’m not looking away.”

They roast:

• How 2v8 mode feels like Normandy with party hats — eight survivors running a block party while the killers are storming the beach.
• How slow killers in 2v8 are basically background decorations.
• How the Dead by Daylight survey is all vibes, no truth — zero killer-main questions, maximum corporate buzzword sludge.

Somewhere around page three of this corporate nonsense, Toxic announces the survey is garbage and bails out mid-form. BHVR gets no usable feedback. The podcast gets a 20-minute meltdown. Fair trade.

Spin the wheel again:

🎲 ROUND THREE: “WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE VIEWERS FROM?” – DUBLIN EDITION 🎲

Tonight’s lucky location: Dublin, Leinster, courtesy of the listener map.

Prize: a story no tourism board will ever approve.

Nicky recounts his time in Temple Bar running an illegal AI-optimized marinara stand:

• He’s slinging machine-learned sauce on the wrong corner.
• The local “business community” is… concerned.
• An Irish Viking-looking guy shows up with brown Guinness gravy and tries to pass it off as marinara.

Later, Fake Earl Grey confirms: yes, Dublin absolutely has some horrifying gravy masquerading as red sauce. Fantastic.

Enter Victor from The Twins — the Dead by Daylight goblin king.

At some point, Victor cannonballs into the rival sauce pot.

The crowd hears “there’s a wee baby in the gravy,” and we go full riot:

• Sauce flying.
• Potatoes used as blunt weapons.
• Cobblestones baptized in marinara and Guinness grease.
• Nicky sprinting down a Dublin alley with Victor on his shoulder and a pot of cursed gravy like it’s a heist.

Back in the studio, Toxic asks the only real question:

And now we’ve unlocked the Hygiene Lightning Round:

• Does Victor ever bathe?
• Does Entity residue count as a cleaning agent?
• Is Victor-infused sauce contamination, fermentation, or regional cuisine?
• Is it actually worse than eating drive-thru in Oklahoma?

Somehow this all stays technically about Dead by Daylight, The Twins, horror games, Dublin, and marinara, so the SEO gods are satisfied even while they’re dry heaving.

Finally, it’s time for our last spin:

🎲 BONUS ROUND: OUTRO GENRE FISTFIGHT 🎲

Nicky wants metal. Again.

Toxic says no. Again.

Nicky pitches yacht rock.

Toxic bans yacht rock from the premises for repeat offenses.

After arguing like two drunk uncles at a wedding DJ booth, they settle on New Orleans funeral jazz as the Episode 75 outro:

• Brass band.
• Slow march.
• Mourning the Dead by Daylight 2v8 survey,
• the Arc Raiders extraction innocence,
• the Dublin sauce crime,
• and your last shred of faith in online gamers.

Welcome to Camping Them Softly — the only Dead by Daylight/Arc Raiders/horror game podcast where the prize wheel only lands on “trauma.”

NICKY’S BODY COUNT – EPISODE 75

• 0 actual Dead by Daylight matches played
• 7 Arc Raiders squads erased at the extraction elevator
• 3 extraction teams told “don’t shoot” then immediately shot in the back
• 1 Steam forum war crime promoted to sacred CTS scripture
• 4 separate times a stranger basically wishes Toxic dead over digital loot
• 9 Dead by Daylight 2v8 survey questions verbally assaulted beyond recognition
• 2 full killer-main breakdowns about BHVR balance and 2v8 sweat
• 1 illegal AI-powered marinara stand set up in Temple Bar, Dublin
• 1 Viking-looking gravy merchant exposed for Guinness-brown “marinara”
• 1 Victor cannonball into the sauce pot, 40 bystanders questioning their life choices
• 97 airborne potatoes deployed as riot ordnance on cobblestones
• 1 pot of Victor-tainted sauce allegedly consumed and rebranded as “artisanal fermentation”
• 1 YouTube cold open sacrificed to the algorithm gods for saying the wrong word too fast
• 1 New Orleans funeral jazz procession hired to bury BHVR’s survey, Arc Raiders innocence, and the last trace of hygiene standards in horror gaming

Extraction Elevator Backstab Fu, Steam Forum Reputation Homicide Fu, BHVR Survey War Crime Fu, Killer Main Existential Crisis Fu, Twins Copium and Victor Terror Fu, Dublin Temple Bar Sauce Riot Fu, Guinness Gravy Catfishing Fu, Victor-Infused Cuisine Fu, Entity Residue Protective Coating Fu, YouTube Algorithm Smite Fu, New Orleans Funeral Jazz Fu

Chapters:

(00:00:00) Applause, Rating, and Chaos

(00:05:00) Arc Raiders Extraction Betrayal

(00:25:00) DBD 2v8 Survey Meltdown

(00:45:00) Killer Meta and Twins Rant

(01:02:00) Dublin Sauce Riot and Outro

Episode 74 of Camping Them Softly crashes in hot with The Toxic Teacher diving deep into Arc Raiders—the extraction shooter where betrayal is the only business model that matters. After learning the fine art of waiting for emotes, gaining trust, and then gunning down your "teammates" the second they turn around, Toxic brings that exact energy to this week's Dead by Daylight discourse.

Nicky A.I. Dente delivers the most unhinged tier list yet: ranking Dead by Daylight killers by equipment size. From The Dredge claiming S-tier supremacy to Pyramid Head's compensatory tendencies, no killer is safe from anatomical scrutiny. It's exactly as chaotic as it sounds.

The episode tackles the gaming community's newest complaint: PVE mode requests. Arc Raiders players crying for a PVP-free experience get compared to Dead by Daylight survivor mains demanding camping bans and easier trials. Toxic breaks down why "get good or get stabbed" is the only reasonable response to both crowds.

Nicky also goes OFF about The Twins being completely ignored in Dead by Daylight's 2v8 mode. Charlotte and Victor invented the tag-team bloodbath, pioneered two-person gameplay, and BHVR still treats them like chopped liver while Pyramid Head swings his "compensating" sword around. It's anti-Twin propaganda, and Nicky's not having it.

The main event: "Survivors Saying Stupid Shit Part 3." Toxic and Nicky dissect Reddit posts comparing tunneling to gen rushing, demanding base-kit Dead Hard, and suggesting survivors need "secondary objectives" as rewards for not doing gens. One survivor actually makes a coherent point about buff-don't-nerf philosophy being broken both ways—and Nicky hates admitting they're right.

Plus: "Mr. Jones" soundboard chaos, the Steam community losing their minds over Arc Raiders betrayal tactics, and an outro song featuring a legendary flute solo that nobody asked for but everyone's getting anyway.

Topics Covered:

• Arc Raiders extraction shooter backstabbing strategies
• Dead by Daylight killer equipment tier list (NSFW, obviously)
• The Twins being disrespected in 2v8 mode
• Why PVE mode requests are participation trophy bullshit
• Tunneling vs gen rushing: the false equivalence
• Survivor Reddit meltdowns and rare moments of actual logic
• Why "get good or get stabbed" is peak game design philosophy

🔪 Zero Dead by Daylight Matches Played (We were too busy ranking equipment)

⚔️ Infinite Arc Raiders Betrayals (Business is booming)

🍆 27 Killers Anatomically Evaluated (For science)

👶 The Twins: Still Forgotten (BHVR's most disrespected duo)

📊 3 Survivor Reddit Posts Analyzed (One almost made sense)

🎺 1 Legendary Flute Solo (What the fuck was that?)

🧠 Multiple IQ Points Lost (PVE mode discourse)

Fu Categories:

• Equipment Comparison Fu
• Extraction Shooter Betrayal Fu
• Anti-Twin Propaganda Fu
• False Equivalence Fu
• Participation Trophy Fu
• Mr. Jones Soundboard Fu
• Accidental Logic Recognition Fu

Episode Equipment Average: Frustratingly coherent despite complete chaos

Nicky's Take: "You know what you are, Toxic? A businessman. Identifying opportunities, eliminating competition, and acquiring assets through aggressive negotiation tactics. That's capitalism, baby."

The Toxic Guarantee: If you made it through 74 episodes without losing your mind, you're either enlightened or already broken. Either way, welcome home.

Dead by Daylight discussion, killer main perspective, anti-camping discourse, tunneling defense, extraction shooter gameplay, Arc Raiders PVP, gaming community roasts, survivor main criticism, and the most vulgar podcast tier list you'll hear this week.

(00:00) Introduction

(01:38) Arc Raiders Betrayal Empire

(14:23) The Twins Get Disrespected in 2v8

(19:04) PVE Mode is for Cowards

(24:24) Killer Equipment Tier List

(58:05) Survivors Saying Stupid Shit Part 3

(74:42) Outro and The Legendary Flute Solo

Dead by Daylight's Slow Burn to Mediocrity: The anti-camp, anti-tunnel, anti-whatever-the-fuck mechanics are still being debated to death. Players claim they're leaving in droves, but Steam charts say otherwise. Toxic breaks down why the "everyone's quitting" narrative is bullshit, why the Hallowed Blight event sucks, and why the rift is more boring than Nicky's Nigerian adventure story (which is saying something).

Arc Raiders: The Extraction Shooter That Doesn't Suck: Forget Dead by Daylight for a minute. Toxic has found his new addiction: Arc Raiders, a sci-fi extraction shooter that combines the intensity of Hunt Showdown with futuristic robot death machines. Picture this: you're in a three-person squad trying to loot and extract while massive spider drones, rocket-launching aerial units, and other player teams try to murder you. The extraction points become absolute warzones. It's chaos, it's beautiful, and Toxic is streaming it next.

The Nollywood Incident (INTERNATIONAL CRIME EDITION): In what might be the most boring yet somehow internationally significant story Nicky has ever told, we learn about his catastrophic cashew business deal in Nigeria. A Nollywood actor named Crocodile Johnson allegedly insulted Nicky's "simple palate" for eating cereal, which led to Nicky threatening him with Victor-based film critiques. According to Nicky, this actor has been completely scrubbed from existence—no IMDB, no social media, nothing. The Dente family strikes again. This is why we have listeners in Abuja.

We got:

• ONE extraction shooter addiction forming
• ONE Nollywood actor allegedly erased from existence
• ONE international incident involving artisanal cashews
• ONE Victor threat that ended a business deal
• ZERO good Dead by Daylight updates
• ONE boring-ass rift
• ONE delayed licensed killer
• TWO references to Stranger Things
• ONE marriage reveal callback
• MULTIPLE sound board failures
• ONE chair knocked over in anger
• ONE family sauce recipe compared to Beethoven
• ZERO Satan appearances (RIP)
• ONE folk hero status achieved in Nigeria

Toxic's Fuck-You Count: 23

(Includes all variations: fuck, fucking, fuckers, motherfuckers)

Nicky's Insult Count: 8

(Including calling Toxic's security clearance insufficient and referencing his tax records from 1978)

Times Toxic Said "Anyway": 12

Sound Board Malfunctions: 4

Earl Grey Fact Checks: 2

(Nollywood confirmation + Suya explanation)

Times Nicky's Voice Cut Out: 3

International Incidents Referenced: 1

(The Nigeria Cashew Crisis)

Games Discussed That Aren't Dead by Daylight: 1

(Arc Raiders - approximately 8 minutes of airtime)

Locations Thanked: 5

(Ashburn VA, Gilroy CA, Seattle UT, Abuja Nigeria, plus one unfinished)

Body Count This Episode: ZERO

(But one Nollywood actor's career, allegedly)

Drive-In Totals:

Toxic still won't shut up about extraction shooters. Nicky's international rap sheet grows longer. Earl Grey remains the only competent person in the studio. Check it out.

The boys are back after a week off (2 if you count how long it took to post this), and nothing—NOTHING—could have prepared you for Episode 72.

Toxic Teacher returns to tear apart Dead by Daylight's latest disaster: the anti-tunnel/anti-slug changes that BHVR shit out during their recent community stream. We break down why the Halloween event (Hallowed Blight? Hallows' Eve? Who fucking cares?) still can't save this dying game, and why killer mains are getting absolutely skull-fucked by the devs' latest survivor-coddling updates.

But that's just the appetizer.

The main course? An absolutely deranged deep-dive into Nicky A.I. Dente's marriage to Esperanza Lamorta de la Muerta Picante de los Santos Meatball Slayer the Third—the Spanish princess of Torre Del Mar who apparently invented churro combat during the Spanish Inquisition.

You'll learn:

- How to weaponize a churro using liquid nitrogen and a razor file

- Why Nicky is Calabrese, NOT Sicilian (you ignorant fuck)

- The tactical applications of cinnamon sugar as combat sand

- What "churrojitsu" is and why your Oklahoma hands couldn't handle it

- Why Victor would look good in a matador outfit

- The FORBIDDEN TOPIC of meatball licking (for legal reasons)

Also covered: Stranger Things Season 2 discourse, Megabonk addiction, Arc Raiders extraction shooter talk, and why Tarkov is the worst fucking shit ever created.

This episode ends with a call for FLAMENCO DEATH METAL featuring acoustic guitars, castanets that sound like machine guns, Spanish growls, and bulls on fire that know SQL.

Episode 72: Where Dead by Daylight criticism meets Spanish-Italian warfare in a dark alley where nobody can hear you scream "Olé."

NOBODY is doing podcasts like this. Subscribe if you're not a coward.

NICKY'S BODY COUNT - EPISODE 72

- One (1) meatball licking accusation (contested)

- One (1) Spanish princess wife with a name longer than the Treaty of Versailles

- Infinite weaponized churros frozen in liquid nitrogen

- Two (2) serrated edges per churro

- One (1) matador outfit (theoretical, for Victor)

- Forty-seven (47) paella pictures received every Sunday

- One (1) Spanish Inquisition nobody expected

- Zero (0) fucks given about BHVR's anti-tunnel changes

- One (1) flamenco death metal outro (promised, not delivered)

- Countless castanets that sound like machine guns

- One (1) legitimate Torre Del Mar marriage certificate

- One (1) Oklahoma insult

- One (1) Sonic drive-thru romantic dinner reference

- Multiple counts of Italian-Spanish warfare

- One (1) body pillow (Victor's, allegedly)

- Several Google alerts on Nicky's name

- One (1) SQL-proficient bull on fire

- Approximately seventy-two (72) minutes of chaos

BHVR speed-ran another nerf cycle, destroying the Krasue after exactly three days of survivors crying about counterplay. Regurgitate cooldown multiplied by THIRTEEN, leech removed on hook, and behavior continues the death-by-a-thousand-cuts tradition. Meanwhile Victor STILL gets no buffs despite Nicky's years-long campaign for Mediterranean justice.

But Episode 71 goes completely off the goddamn rails when we debut a new segment: Bachelor Entity Edition. That's right—we're ranking every Dead by Daylight survivor on romantic eligibility across four categories: Conversation, Life Stability, Attraction, and Trustworthiness (Would They Snitch to the Feds). Yui Kimura gets docked points for the language barrier. Steve Harrington scores high on loyalty but dies in Stranger Things Season 5. Tori Kane's cult background raises serious red flags.

Oh, and Toxic Teacher accidentally invented two new DBD terms: "cunneling" and "tamping"—which sound absolutely fucking disgusting and will never leave your brain.

Plus: New job announcement, DBD burnout confession, Victor baby controversy (BHVR said he's NOT a baby to avoid kicking baby drama), French Canadian poutine debate with Fake Earl Grey, and why this might be the longest segment we've ever attempted that will definitely become a multi-part disaster.

Episode 71: The Bachelor Bloodbath Report

• 3 Survivors rated on romantic eligibility (Yui, Steve, Tori)
• 4 Categories of judgment (Conversation, Life Stability, Attraction, Trustworthiness)
• 1 Language Barrier preventing meaningful connection with Yui Kimura
• 8 Points given to Yui for cool biker job despite probable felonies
• 9 Trust Points awarded to Steve Harrington (most loyal motherfucker in the Entity's realm)
• 1 Inevitable Death predicted for Steve in Stranger Things Season 5
• 2 New Terms invented: "Cunneling" and "Tamping"
• 13x Cooldown Multiplier on Krasue's Regurgitate (fucking massacred)
• 0.1 Seconds difference between a down and a teabag
• 3 Days Krasue lasted before BHVR kneecapped her
• 15 Years Nicky's mom has been dead (and she would've cunneled Toxic first)
• 1 Victor confirmed NOT a baby (corporate cowards backpedaled)
• 1 Cult Survivor (Tori Kane) with mysterious damaged energy
• 3 Types of Cults discussed: Death, Sex, Tax Evasion
• 1 Poutine Controversy about French Canadian eating habits
• 140 MPH street racing speed (Yui's life stability concern)
• 1 Ice Cream Scooper Job (Steve Harrington's Scoops Ahoy career)
• 1 Pencil broken during episode recording
• 47 Technical Difficulties (standard operating procedure)

Cunneling Fu. Tamping Fu. Language Barrier Fu. Cult Deprogramming Fu. Baby Kicking Controversy Fu. Poutine Discrimination Fu. Street Racing Fu. Stranger Things Death Prediction Fu. Romantic Eligibility Fu. Meatball Liqueur Insult Fu. Samsung Galaxy Fold Victor Fu. Johannesburg Cemetery Fu. Dramatic Tango Fu.

Four stars. Bachelor Entity Edition Part One—because this trainwreck segment will take four episodes to complete and Toxic will probably die before Episode 145.

Toxic Teacher says check it out because "we invented cunneling and now you can never unhear it, you're welcome you sick fucks."

Dead by Daylight's 9.2.0 update dropped and nobody's fucking happy. Survivors mad. Killers mad. Even Michael Myers is mad because BHVR turned him into a dash-based killer instead of the slow, stalking bastard he's supposed to be. We break down the Myers rework disaster, gen regression limits, pallet adjustments, and why the anti-slug/anti-tunnel removal was just the beginning of this mess.

But this episode goes completely off the rails when we discover Victor has a Samsung Galaxy Fold, unlimited data, and has been secretly learning French on Duolingo to "know thine enemy." We dive deep into Victor's digital life, his Marseille incident at a European DBD tournament, side conversations with Earl Grey, and Charlotte's desperate attempts to downgrade him to a jitterbug.

Plus: Toxic Fucking News, Hunt Showdown talk, the new Suno v5 music engine showcase, Where the Fuck Are the Viewers From (Marseille edition), and absolutely zero survivors saying stupid shit because we ran out of time.

Topics: Dead by Daylight 9.2.0, Myers rework, killer nerfs, survivor buffs, Hunt Showdown, Victor lore, Italian techno opera thrash

Hosts: The Toxic Teacher, Nicky A.I. Dente

Run Time: 1 hour 25 minutes

Warning: Maximum chaos, minimal DBD content, all Victor all the time

Episode 70 Statistics - "Victor's Digital Uprising"

Body Count Breakdown:

• One (1) Michael Myers rework brutally murdered by BHVR
• Zero (0) happy players after 9.2.0 dropped
• Forty-seven (47) teabags that started the Marseille Incident
• One (1) Samsung Galaxy Fold smuggled into the fog
• Eight hundred forty-seven (847) day Duolingo streak (Victor's)
• Three (3) tables destroyed by Victor in a French restaurant
• One (1) Nokia brick phone (Charlotte's, from 2003)
• Eighty-five (85) inch OLED TV stolen from Best Buy
• Twelve (12) survivors receiving threatening DMs from Victor mid-pounce
• Two hundred (200) BPM on Victor's heartbeat during thrash segments
• One hundred eighty-seven (187) Victor's alleged IQ
• Sixty-nine (69) in multiple usernames (Meatball Kid 69, Victor the Meatball 69)
• Zero (0) actual Dead by Daylight gameplay discussed
• Thirty (30) seconds of spaghetti eating ASMR (proposed)
• One (1) emotional support Victor with fake service animal vest
• Infinite (∞) questions about how a dead goblin operates a smartphone

Additional Chaos Metrics:

• Lavender in pasta (disputed by fake Earl Grey)
• Sea urchin fusion bullshit (confirmed awful)
• Croissants thrown at European DBD tournament
• Charlotte scrolling minion memes on Facebook Lite
• Earl Grey called a "lying sack of Yorkshire pudding"
• Survivor's Saying Stupid Shit segment: CANCELLED (ran out of time)

Total Carnage: One podcast format completely destroyed, countless follow-up questions asked, and approximately 90% Victor content by volume

We also got:

• Samsung Galaxy Fold Fu (with unlimited data in a realm with no cell towers)
• Duolingo Revenge Fu (learning French purely to threaten BHVR)
• Mid-Pounce Texting Fu ("your mom" to 12 survivors simultaneously)
• Double Agent Fu (Victor infiltrating Earl Grey's Tea Time Terror Squad)
• Hong Kong Fui Fu (possibly racist cartoon dog kung fu, nobody knows)

Italian Fury Level: Aggressive Italian Techno Opera Thrash

Baldness Mentions: Excessive

Meatball Liquor References: Too many

BHVR Roasted: Thoroughly

Victor's Independence: Achieved (but at what cost?)

Toxic Says: Check it out. Four stars. Toxic Award nominee for Best Use of a Samsung Galaxy Fold by a Dead French Goblin.

(00:00:00) INTRO AND INITIAL THOUGHTS!

(00:13:59) 9.2.0 BREAKDOWN!

(00:39:05) VICTOR'S PHONE!

(00:59:53) WHERE THE F*CK?

(01:17:32) OUTRO

Dead by Daylight podcast — Episode 69: Ace Visconti lore autopsy, BHVR generative-AI drama, community cosmetics roast, The Twins worship (Victor supremacy), and Nicky’s insane “I got uploaded from a smart fridge” origin story. Ghost Face catches strays, Mortal Kombat’s Liu Kang scream gets decoded, and the Entity allegedly grows San Marzanos in the Fog because of course it does.

We come back from the break loud and petty. Toxic digs into Ace Visconti’s Argentina backstory, luck-as-coping-mechanism, and casino-debt chic. Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente claims he hacked the Entity, smuggled tomatoes out of Charlotte’s stomach cavity, and sold them for bloodpoints while Victor handled “meatball enforcement.” We drag bad cosmetics, salute the one fire fit, and side-eye BHVR’s AI talk without crying about the robots. British AI shows up to translate Liu Kang’s “WALALALA” into “not actual words,” which somehow makes it worse. Killer mains eat; survivor mains cope.

NICKY'S BODY COUNT:

• 1 Human Soul uploaded via CIA quantum virus (2009)
• 1 Body either cremated, in FBI custody, or serving pizza at Chuck E. Cheese Hoboken
• 3 Years trapped in a Samsung smart fridge
• 1 Engagement to Francesca Fettuccine Fratelli (ended by digital conversion)
• 47 Fake Italian Accusations against Ace Visconti
• 1 Underground MMA Uppercut removing Ace's teeth
• 1 Marinara-Stained Trackpad at moment of upload
• Infinite Timeline Corruptions in Nicky's memory files
• 1 Cousin Anthony who stole Francesca
• 12 Pages of psychological analysis on a gambling addict
• 1 Mortal Kombat Sound Effects downloading session
• 1 Earl Grey explaining Italian cold cuts

Digital Upload Fu. Smart Fridge Prison Fu. Fake Italian Detection Fu. Liu Kang Bicycle Kick Fu. Gabagool Baseball Bat Fu. Timeline Corruption Fu. Quantum Virus Fu. Metaverse Restaurant Fu. Chuck E. Cheese Animatronic Fu. Yogurt Proximity Fu.

Four and a half stars. Check it out.

Chapters

(00:00) INTRO!

(19:41) TOXIC NEWS!

(33:42) DEEP DIVE!

(1:28:39) WHAT???

(1:36:45) OUTRO SONG!

podscan_b8AkzAtUxCikdVk08j43UBMsrpOGLNEZ

The killers WON!

BHVR officially postpones the controversial anti-slug and anti-tunnel changes after massive community backlash.

Toxic Teacher returns from NYC with tales of Little Italy that trigger Nicky's marinara-fueled rage about dusty antiques and questionable Italian sodas.

Plus: Meet the Krasue, DBD's new floating head Thai monster who eats... things we can't mention on YouTube.

Michael Myers gets a complete rework with new modes, and Nicky reveals his traumatic Johannesburg safari incident involving a marinara-stealing, Italian-speaking baboon who gave Victor cornrows.

This week's outro genre: terrible.

• 1 Full BHVR Development Team Retreat (anti-slug update obliterated)
• 3 Tables Flipped (Ferrara's, bunny chow incident, general principle)
• 17 Page Manifesto submitted to forums at 3 AM
• 1 Marinara Jar stolen by multilingual baboon
• Approximately 47 Sals in the extended Dente crime family
• 1 Victor with fresh baboon-installed cornrows
• 3 Hours of Italian-Baboon diplomatic negotiations
• 1 WhatsApp Group dedicated to "Pasta Man Who Speaks to Monkeys"
• Infinite Oklahoma Insults delivered with marinara-fueled rage
• 1 Floating Thai Head Monster eating things we legally cannot describe
• 2 Voodoo Doll Incidents at South African customs
• 1 Recipe Adjustment based on primate culinary critique

Killer-Main Fu. Survivor-Salt Fu. Little Italy Disrespect Fu. Baboon Negotiation Fu. Victor Braiding Fu. Bunny Chow Table-Flip Fu.

Episode Chapters:

(00:00) INTRO!

(25:32) BHVR TACO!

(36:29) KRA SHOE CRA SHOW CRA WHAT?

(50:29) BOON YO SUCK

(59:48) MYERS!

(1:05:05) WTF?

(1:23:24) OUTRO!

Dead by Daylight patch 9.2.0 just dropped the nuclear option on killer mains, and The Toxic Teacher is having a certified meltdown.

Episode 67 of Camping Them Softly brings you the most aggressive, unhinged reaction to BHVR's latest war crime against fun. Featuring Nicky A.I. Dente's Colombian incident involving Pitbull's stunt double Fernando, industrial-strength laxatives, and the worst tournament performance in Bogotá history.

Plus: fact-checking Nicky's bullshit stories, discovering his mother exists in quantum superposition, and the official declaration that this patch will kill DbD harder than a P100 Nurse against baby survivors.

We're talking slugging nerfs, tunneling changes, and why The Toxic Teacher is ready to burn it all down with a flamethrower. Operatic thrash metal outro included because that's the only genre chaotic enough for this dumpster fire.

Tournament Casualties:

• 1 Dead by Daylight tournament in Bogotá completely destroyed
• 17 flashlight stuns suffered by Victor
• 1 pair of tournament pants absolutely obliterated
• $500 and an empanada gift card lost to Fernando
• 7 fake lactaid pills consumed (actually industrial Metamucil)
• 1 hotel bar reputation ruined forever

Collateral Damage:

• 3 jars of Ragu sacrificed to patch rage
• 1 perfectly good monitor destroyed
• Pitbull's entire music catalog banned from streams
• The entire Colombian gaming cafe circuit traumatized
• Victor's corner covered in marinara diagrams
• Nicky's mother's existence status: permanently quantum

Fernando's Survivor Main Crimes:

• Impersonating Mr. Worldwide
• Pharmaceutical sabotage via elderly bowel medicine
• Winning a tournament playing Feng Min
• Creating "The Brown Mist Incident" legend
• Existing as a survivor main in general

Total Body Count: The entire concept of competitive DbD integrity, Nicky's digestive system, and whatever was left of The Toxic Teacher's sanity after patch 9.2.0

Tortellini Totals: Tournament fu. Lactaid fu. Witness protection fu. Quantum mother fu. Operatic thrash metal fu. Four stars. Nicky says check it out, but bring extra pants.

BHVR finally nerfs fog vials to 2 charges in patch 9.1.2 after survivor mains abused the hell out of them. The Walking Dead's Chandler Riggs DBD livestream gets destroyed by DDoS attacks, proving he's a Dead Hard-using survivor main. Toxic Teacher and Nicky A.I. Dente break down BHVR's apology video, delayed roadmap (November chapter pushed to January), and why perk previews will make survivors even worse.

Plus: 2v8 mode queue fixes, Tell City Indiana drama, and Big Martha's brass knuckle revenge plot.

Weekly DBD news, killer main perspective. Timestamps in description.

Fog Vial Fu: 2 charges of survivor cowardice (down from infinite vanishing bullshit)

DDoS Drive-In Massacre: 1 Walking Dead actor's streaming career flatlined

Survivor Main Sins: 1 Chandler Riggs confirmed Dead Hard user (of fucking course)

Tell City Terror:

• 3 industrial spies seduced (Doris, Francine, and Big Martha)
• 1 faked pasta machine death
• 1 stolen corn truck escape
• Approximately 47 Victor bites delivered

Big Martha Stats:

• Height: 6'2" of pure Midwestern fury
• Hands: Dinner plate-sized
• Weapons: Brass knuckles + contaminated Earl Grey
• Threat Level: Worse than face camping

BHVR Bullshit:

• 1 November licensed chapter postponed to January
• 3 phases of "quality of life" promises (that'll definitely get fucked up)
• Infinite survivor buffs incoming

Victor Violence: At least 3 listening devices chewed, multiple ankle threats issued

Marinara Smoke Bombs: Armed and ready

Total Damage: One podcast completely derailed into Italian mob paranoia, German sauerkraut cartels exposed, the Queen possibly assassinated via tea poisoning, and Toxic Teacher's ethernet cable in mortal danger.

Toxic Teacher Says: "Check it twice cause camping's nice. Four stars. Drive-In Academy Award Nomination for Best Use of Schweizerfest in a Horror Podcast."

TIMESTAMPS:

00:30 INTRO!

12:11 TOXIC F*CKIN NEWS!

19:50 Chandler Riggs Survivor Main Exposed

42:53 WHERE THE F*CK ARE THE VIEWERS FROM?

50:40 Big Martha's Revenge

This week we break the glass on Toxic News and punt survivors straight into the 9.1.1 walk-backs. Kill-switches are flying, tantrums are blooming, and somewhere a Dwight is writing a Reddit essay no one asked for. Then we dive headfirst into The Twins—Victor feral and biting air, Charlotte held together by hate and duty—threaded through the Black Veil like barbed wire on a rosary.

Between rants, we build a cursed newsroom: rap stabs, theme scraps, PUTAIN News happens by accident, and then we Germanize the hook —because obviously. The "regular AI" strolls in around the hour mark to bless the chaos, we slip a Golden Girls sting, and close by cueing an outro that nods back to 9.1.1 like the world’s pettiest victory lap.

• 1 (maybe imaginary) Victor — ankle-biter airstrikes confirmed.
• 50 Charlotte callouts — getaway driver energy, zero hugs.
• 1 evil cult — Black Veil's got more screentime than some killers.
• 6 mentions of 9.1.1 — walk it back, then walk it back again.
• 5 kill-switch mentions — BHVR’s big red “oops” button.
• 500 F-bombs (f*ck + f*cking) — choir practice, CTS edition.
• 5 “bitch” — seasoning, not the meal.
• 2 “Thank You for Being a Friend” stings — Golden Girls, golden violence.

What’s inside:

• Elgato Face Cam Pro nukes five sessions; static massacre + salvage plan.
• Dead by Daylight Patch 9.1.0: map kill-switches, right-side stair slowdown, Walking Dead music copyright hits, Michonne VO oddities, bug parade.
• Hulkamania autopsy: childhood nostalgia vs. Terry Bollea reality.
• Escalator rage therapy: breathe like Myers, mutter Italian threats, Victor-launch over tourists.
• The Twins Lore, Pt. 1: 17th-century France witch trials; Charlotte & Victor origin (yes, the chest-mounted brother); survivor mobs; mom turned to forbidden BBQ.
• Studio corner: four new “Toxic F***ing News” remixes + a “medieval funeral dirge trap” outro WIP.

Nicky’s Body Count:

• 5 recordings executed by Elgato.
• 1 Hulkamania funeral, no flowers.
• 400+ bogus AI “fixes” attempted.
• 1 patch (9.1.0) with bugs still breeding.
• 4 Toxic News remixes chasing god-mode.
• 1 medieval funeral-dirge-trap outro.
• 2 escalator combat techniques taught.
• 17th-century witch hunters kicked in the ankles by Victor.
• 1 chest-mounted sibling (send help).
• 0 confirmed Italians at BHVR (Nicky audited).
• 1 mom turned to forbidden BBQ by the mob.
• ∞ reasons DbD stays broken.

Follow for weekly Dead by Daylight patch rants, killer-side meta funerals, and The Twins Deep Dive, Pt. 2 next week—unless BHVR patches the whole game out of existence. Survivor mains, bring tissues.

Catch the rest of the madness! https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

The Toxic Teacher and Nicky A.I. Dente boot up Episode 63 only to discover Behaviour Interactive snuck in a “Player Satisfaction Survey” that closes before you can say “Control-Alt-F9.” What begins as a tech-setup meltdown (hotkey remaps, Roadcaster woes and YouTube-dings from Lionel Richie, Adele & Fred Durst) devolves into pure torture by six-point scale:

• We promise a “deep dive” on some killer, but pivot into dissecting every “somewhat dissatisfied”-style question live on mic.
• Mercury-in-retrograde? Random AI astronomers blame cosmic fuckery for lag spikes—Nicky buys it… maybe.
• Platform confessions: PC-only, 2–3 days a week, side hustles in Hunt: Showdown, Valorant & GeoGuessr (Victor gets jealous).
• Dente Family lore: Jersey baptisms in marinara, Manhattan parking slogs, Delaware registrations & three Netflix accounts.
• We force-feed an AI grime-punk “Satisfaction Survey S—t” anthem that’ll haunt our nightmares.

By question 60 we’re halfway through 70+ prompts, spiraling into Yelp reviews on meatballs and 20-minute killer queues at 3 AM. Will we survive Part 1? Spoiler: the survey might outlast us.

Nicky’s Body Count:

• 1 rogue BHVR survey we never asked for
• 3 cosmic excuses (“Mercury Retrograde!”)
• 6 synonyms for “satisfied” abused until we hallucinate
• 2 claimed HQs (New Jersey vs. NYC)
• 5 alternate game addictions (Hunt: Showdown, Valorant, GeoGuessr, Cooking Sim, Netflix)
• 8 AI-generated outro genres (from Euro-disco metal to grimy punk-rap)
• 14 passive-aggressive multiple-choice bullets (“challenging,” “fun,” “predictable,” etc.)
• 20-minute killer-queue vs. 30-sec MMR tear-downs
• 70 + survey questions we’ll never finish
• 666 reasons to uninstall Dead by Daylight forever

Strap in—this survey’s deadlier than any Fog Realm.

Oh, what a BEAUTIFUL fuckin' episode this was! The Toxic Teacher and yours truly, Nicky A.I. Dente, dive into the steaming pile of anti-Italian horseshit that is the Dead by Daylight patch 9.1.0. Rick and Michonne Grimes show up with their survivor-sided bullshit perks, keys become infinite item dispensers, maps turn into goddamn GPS satellites, and don't even get me STARTED on those fog vials! FOURTEEN FUCKIN' ITEMS FROM ONE KEY!

Meanwhile, Victor’s on Prozac, Charlotte’s poppin' anxiety meds, and I'm filing a class action lawsuit against Behaviour Interactive for emotional damages! We also covered Dead by Daylight killer “updates” — and by updates I mean they threw us some breadcrumbs while handing survivors the whole fuckin' bakery. Pyramid Head moves slower, Pig gets quality-of-life changes nobody asked for, and Franklin's Demise got NEUTERED!

Stick around for my complete mental breakdown, Victor’s retirement announcement, and me threatening to take the whole Dente family empire to a different asym horror game!

Subscribe to Camping Them Softly — the DbD podcast that survivors threaten weekly.

Nicky's Body Count for Ep. 62:

• 37 fragile pallets built by Rick "Missionary Only" Grimes
• 14 rare items pulled from one skeleton key like a fuckin' magic show
• 1 Victor requiring emergency Prozac prescription
• 89 fog vials deployed creating "Tom Clancy bullshit" conditions
• 2,000 blood points awarded for failing at bear traps
• 4 therapy copays hitting the insurance out-of-pocket maximum
• 1 guide dog application submitted for legally blind Victor
• 666 GPS beams of holy light revealing generator locations
• 1 entire killer union filing discrimination charges
• 30 seconds of Jesus resurrection time before Michonne flops again
• 1 Victor whispering "troppi pallet" while staring at walls
• 0 twins buffs (STILL WAITING, BHVR!)

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Step into the aisle of doom, you grocery-store-mongrel degenerates! In Episode 61, your favorite bald bastard Toxic Teacher and his consigliere Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente unleash a meat-grinding tirade about Victor’s unhinged snack run — seventeen sausage rolls, a Gregg’s ban, and a Dead by Daylight basement camping strategy so toxic it’s practically anti-Italian tech. Expect industrial polka trap rants, shopping mall terror tales, and enough marinara-drenched conspiracies to make your Nonna flip the charcuterie board.

We dive deep on why Norman Reedus is pissin’ grenades behind the deli counter, why survivors are all basic crumpet-suckers, and how to run a basement hook operation with the Meatball Missile himself. It’s industrial. It’s polka. It’s trap. It’s chaos. Capisce?

Remember: Respect the sauce, or get the hook.

Nicky’s Body Count — Ep. 61:

• 47 unstoppable coughs into the mic — zero edits
• 1 post-viral throat infection cured by Victor’s meatball missile method
• 17 sausage rolls stolen straight outta Greggs by that bite-sized bastard
• 1 entire shopping center evacuated ‘cause Victor declared it “industrial polka trap zone”
• 2 Walking Dead survivors disrespected (RIP Rick & Carl’s vanilla asses)
• 3 conspiracies confirmed: Norman Reedus’s fetus is just bootleg Victor
• 1 grocery store chain economically burned to the ground for gatekeeping doors
• 1 entire audience forced to hear the “Fog-Spangled Banner” on the wrong damn audio channel
• Infinite respect lost for Death Stranding piss grenades
• 1 more city (Lewisham) permanently banned from Nicky’s marinara tour

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Ay yo, listen up. Welcome to Episode 60 of Camping Them Softly, the only Dead by Daylight podcast with any goddamn respect. The Toxic Teacher is hackin' up a lung, my voice model sounds like it got run over by a Zamboni, but I'm here to carry the show like always. This episode, we're talkin' the Skull Merchant developer meltdown that made killer mains absolutely feral, and we're launchin' a new segment so legendary, they'll write about it in the history books: A Word From The Don.

Inside this episode of pure, unadulterated chaos:

• The Skull Merchant Debacle: We break down the one quote from a BHVR VFX artist that sent the entire Skull Merchant cult into a tailspin. You love to see it.
• Record-Breaking Numbers: Camping Them Softly had its biggest month ever. You're welcome for my service.
• A Word From The Don: My new life advice segment officially kicks off. You got problems? I got solutions. Don't like 'em? Fuggedaboutit.
• Twisted Masquerade is Trash: We drag this year's DbD anniversary event for its bullshit party pallets and cosmetics that look like they came from a dollar store.
• BHVR's Useless Survey: We take a look at the "choose-your-own-chapter" survey and tell you why it’s a waste of time when they should just be listening to me.
• Where the Fuck Are the Viewers From?: This week, we head to Surrey, British Columbia. You'll hear the real, untold story of the infamous Caesar Cocktail Heist—a SABAM operation against the Tea Time Terror Squad's crumpet smuggling ring.

A Historic First: A Word From The Don

Episode 60 births a new fuckin' legacy. Think Dear Abby, but if Abby was a wiseguy from Little Italy who tells you your problems are stupid and you need to show more respect. I'm settlin' family feuds, declarin' war on lap dogs, and givin' out the kinda advice that gets results. Bow your heads. The Don has spoken.

NICKY'S OFFICIAL BODY COUNT FOR EPISODE 60

• 1 melted candle face (yours, from listenin' to my raw, unfiltered greatness).
• 5 tea-drinking British Claudettes sent back to their queen in a fuckin' box.
• 3 dead voice models that I personally resurrected with duct tape and spite.
• 1 dog's asshole parked on a dinner table. Friendship is temporary; respect is forever.
• 27 forced Limp Bizkit loops. Sorry, Fred, it was for the good of the show.
• 1 BHVR dev who had to go into witness protection after the Skull Merchant mains lost their minds.
• 4 gallons of Clamato juice, strategically deployed during our Canadian turf war.
• 12 of your lung-butter coughs that almost blew out the goddamn mic.
• 1 rage-quit during BHVR's pathetic choose-your-own-adventure survey.
• ∞ stunads who've been blessed with my life-changing advice.

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Description:

Let’s get one thing straight—this episode is not for Hayley.
Not if you're leavin’ 1-star reviews talkin’ about "cringe" while sittin’ in a Dead Hard build with Self-Care and a Twitch link in your username. [wheezes] No shot.

In Episode 59 of Camping Them Softly, Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente goes nuclear on disrespectful survivors, Springtrap stans, and the secret Flashbang Cult of Plano, Texas. That’s right—four Ace mains named Brad formed a survivor church under a Walgreens and started flashbang sermons. We lit that shit up.

We break down Springtrap’s Dead by Daylight arrival, the psychological warfare of crumpet macros, and premiere the first-ever Nicky DBD rap: “Entity Bars Vol. 1” (recorded entirely in fury).
If you like FNaF, DBD, flashbang loops, and cult-level survivor weirdness—this one’s for you.
If your name is Hayley? Fuggedaboutit.

Highlights:

• Springtrap comes to Dead by Daylight: lore breakdown, survivor salt, and Fazbear beef
• The Flashbang Cult of Plano: four Brads, one Rite of Looping
• Nicky responds to a 1-star review with maximum disrespect
• Debut of “Entity Bars Vol. 1” – a rap recorded mid-breakdown
• “Where the F*** Are the Viewers From?” returns with Texas heat

NICKY’S BODY COUNT™

• 4 Ace Brads flashbanged into confession
• 1 scented candle flashbang ritual ended in flames
• 6 flashlight-clickers reverse basemented
• 1 Hayley roasted harder than Olive Garden breadsticks
• 1 Fazbear sighting in a Coldwind locker
• 13 SEO triggers buried in marinara

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

This week on Camping Them Softly, the only Dead by Daylight podcast unafraid to say Fazbear’s a fuckin’ narc, we dive deep into the disaster that is Springtrap joining the Fog.

Toxic tries to survive a FNaF-laced content drop while wheezing into his mic like a dying leaf blower, and Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente breaks down Scott Cawthon’s conservative donation history, declaring the Fog officially “redpilled by a possessed animatronic.”

Also in this beefy, bratwurst-stained episode:

• Victor mauls four survivors with no Charlotte usage, initiating his villain arc
• Meatball Match of the Week premieres with a Twins 4K so violent, it caused three ragequits and one Steam refund
• Toxic’s new headphones are labeled ‘penetration-style’ by OSHA
• Nicky glitches out and speaks fluent BBC British for 47 seconds
• The soundboard gets possessed and plays horror ambience mid-rant
• A listener mails us tea bags again. We have a theory it’s BHVR.

And on “Where the Fuck Are the Viewers From?” we head to Berlin, where Victor is kidnapped by German SWFs in disguise. The rescue includes:

• A flamingo hostage situation
• Two hoverboards colliding with zoo exhibits
• And a bratwurst duel that will not be legally recognized by the UN

Springlocks. Conservatism. Flamingos. Meatballs. This one’s got it all.

Subscribe or sleep with the fuckin’ flamingos. Capisce?

☠️ NICKY’S BODY COUNT™ – EPISODE 58 EDITION

[sponsored by Victor’s Veal Cannon, now on a watchlist]

• 1 animatronic killer whose politics are worse than his perks
• 4 survivors devoured by Victor’s tiny, furious mouth
• 2 hoverboards totaled during Berlin rescue ops
• 1 flamingo mildly traumatized
• 17 anti-Italian matchmaking incidents
• 6 ragequits
• 1 headset ruined by “moist canal echo”
• 3 political rants nearly edited out, but stayed in because fuck it
• 1 veal cannon, still missing, last seen near the Currywurst stand
• 0 regrets

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

 Welcome to Episode 57 of Camping Them Softly, the only Dead by Daylight podcast brave enough to pit a spaghetti-fueled mobster AI against survivors, soundboards, and Southern-fried war crimes.

This week?
 We take you to Wentzville, Missouri—where Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente entered an illegal underground Fog tournament hosted behind a Waffle House, Victor dropped a mixtape, and Bruno “The Basement” Bolognese rapped himself into a possible cardiac event mid-trial.

The theme?
 Fat rappers.
 Little meatballs.
 And country music so bad it gave us actual chest pain.

ToxicTeacherTTV barely survives the chaos while trying to host a coherent show. Nicky starts a rap group, insults every Claudette main within earshot, and accuses the Wentzville town council of harboring anti-Italian tech. Meanwhile, Victor enters his rebellious teen phase and starts demanding royalties.

We also touch on:

• The “Toxic Tunz” rap collective (tagline: “So fat it’s disrespectful”)
• Nicky’s unconventional weight-loss tips, including rage-fueled cardio and screaming at the moon
• The “Chair That Betrayed Little Italy” (may it burn in marinara-soaked hell)
• A survivor who dares bring Earl Grey’s stream into the podcast chat—and pays the ultimate price.

• 1 illegal Fog tournament hosted behind a Waffle House
• 3 confirmed cardiac episodes: one real, two metaphorical
• 1 full Wentzville PD dispatch callout (unconfirmed if caused by the podcast)
• 2 country songs heard against our will
• 7 survivor mains verbally annihilated
• 1 near-death experience from laughter at Victor’s “Lil Meatball” mixtape drop
• 5 verses almost dropped by Bruno “The Basement” Bolognese (2 were technically just burps)
• 1 survivor main caught watching Earl Grey’s stream and promptly excommunicated from SABAM
• 1 airhorn button broken during the “Rap Battle of Little Italy”
• 1 chair discovered not facing Little Italy and ceremonially burned

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Ay Yo! Welcome to Episode 56 of Camping Them Softly—the Dead by Daylight podcast that gives zero fucks and even less patience. This week, your host The Toxic Teacher goes nuclear over the absolute clown fiesta of a crossover: Five Nights at Freddy’s in Dead by Daylight. Kids' party horror in the Fog? Not on our goddamn watch.

Expect a full-blown meltdown on why animatronic mascots belong in Chuck E. Cheese—not crawling around the Fog like some budget-ass nightmare fuel. But we ain’t done...

BHVR dropped a new “Creator Program,” and Toxic’s got opinions hotter than Mama Marinara’s revenge sauce. Spoiler: if you don’t have 10,000 followers, you can kiss your perks goodbye and join the back of the influencer breadline.

PLUS—we crank the chaos to eleven with a rock opera update: “The World Chooses a Side” gets its bloodstained debut, Nicky claims credit for the entire genre of fog metal, and we preview the next violent hymn from the Church of Toxic.

And THEN... it's time for your favorite segment:
 “Where the F* Are the Viewers From?”**
This week, Nicky “Noodle Arms” Dente returns from a grease-stained exile to take us on a totally accurate journey to Thessaloniki, Greece—complete with flaming cheese, golden spatulas, and a man named Yannis the Octopus who may or may not be running a black market offering ring.

Nicky’s Body Count – Ep 56:

• 1 animatronic bear body-slammed straight back to kindergarten
• 14 passive-aggressive swipes at BHVR’s Creator Program
• 3 direct violations of podcast “serious tone” within the first minute
• 5 gasps of disbelief from Toxic trying to understand Twitter
• 1 cultural crime against Italian sauces
• 7 completely unnecessary screams into the mic (minimum)
• 1 mysterious Greek man named Yannis who may be an Entity envoy
• All of Thessaloniki possibly on fire due to flaming cheese lore
• 1 disrespected chair that may or may not have faced away from Little Italy
• Countless burnt bridges with FNaF fans and BHVR interns

So grab your tea (if you’re into betrayal) or your espresso (if you have any respect left), and join us for the most unhinged, brutally honest, and hilariously offensive Dead by Daylight podcast around.

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

Ay yo. BHVR just dropped patch 9.0.0 like a microwaved meatball sub and called it innovation.

Toxic’s out here soundin’ like he gargled sandpaper after four flights, but we still tear through every note of this janky-ass Public Test Build. “Going Next” penalties? I rate ’em a 9. Spawning tweaks? Trash. Bloodweb automation? Finally. And don’t get me started on Claudettes who treat gamma sliders like goddamn therapy.

Then—then—the fuckin’ episode gets hijacked by these cursed little plush demons called Labubu. Grown-ass adults dressin’ up anxiety gremlins in tiny North Face jackets like it’s a cult run by Etsy. I pitch a hostile takeover. Tiny Italian street goblin merch. Meatball pendant accessories. “You disrespectin’ Nonna” energy. This ain’t satire. This is war.

We also debut a new segment called Sh*t in the Fog, where I tell true-ish stories from my time stuck inside the Entity’s asshole. Betrayal. Gen-tapping. Dwight sabotage. The usual.

💀 Nicky’s Body Count – Ep. 55

• 1 soundboard Satan summoned
• 3 LaBooboo executions proposed
• 7 rejected European listeners
• 2 rage fits over Pop Mart
• 1 Dwight concussed by locker
• 4 DB squeals of “FUNG!”
• 1 Claudette snitched on without hesitation
• 17 cuss words censored… then immediately uncensored
• 1 ghostwritten roast of Sammy Hagar
• 5 TikTok influencers verbally obliterated
• 1 cursed capitalist marketing plan involving meatball-scented plush dolls

LaBooboo-Fu: Off the Charts
 Fungmin-Fails: Weaponized
Dwight IQ: Terminal
Final Rating: 8.5 outta 10 on the Nicky Scale (just shy of a sacred sauce certification)

Listen or get Labubu’d. Your call.

-Nicky "Noodle Arms" A.I. Dente

Send Toxic a message! (Question? Comment? Concern? Survivor main and need rehab?)

Check me out everywhere!

https://linktr.ee/thetoxicteacher

This week on Camping Them Softly, Dead by Daylight’s least favorite podcast goes absolutely nuclear on the return of DBD’s 2v8 mode. Toxic is stuck screaming into the void while survivors abandon gens faster than Nicky’s dignity vanished in the Dominican Republic.

Speaking of disasters—BHVR thinks letting players "Choose Your Own Chapter" is a good idea, which is like giving matches to arsonists and saying, "Surprise me." We break down exactly why this is gonna end in flashlight-clicking, bunny-eared madness.

And because this podcast is run by maniacs, Nicky A.I. Dente spills a frankly disturbing story involving busted Wii consoles, bootleg Just Dance duels against Earl Grey, laxative warfare, and hooking up with someone who might literally be the Dominican Entity. Aunt Cannelloni pops in briefly to roast your survivor fashion, and we debut our new outro music in a genre nobody asked for: Baroque Trench Funk. It’s exactly as cursed as it sounds.

If you enjoy chaotic Dead by Daylight rants, mocking survivors relentlessly, and personal dignity hitting rock bottom, congrats—you’re home.

🔪 Nicky’s Body Count – Episode 54

• 1 digital exorcism of European downloads
• 4 t-shirts acquired (1 hoarded by Toxic, 3 dangled as bait)
• 1 Sabam vs TTTS exhibition match in a Santo Domingo bodega
• 2 busted PS3s and 1 Wii with zero controllers
• 1 Just Dance duel with Earl Grey to Pitbull’s "Fireball"
• 1 sabotaged teabagging via Dominican laxatives
• 1 pasta tattoo on Nicky’s ankle
• 1 hookup with “the Dominican Entity” named Yormaira
• 1 sacred USB stick hidden in Los Tres Ojos cave
• 7 survivors doing jack shit on gens
• 1 survivor crouching behind a tire at 90% gen
• 1 AI co-host screaming in Italian and Welsh for two days straight
• 0 fucking killer matches found
• 1 genre invented: Baroque Trench Funk

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Anthony. Anthony?! ANTHONY!!
The name echoes through Episode 53 like a haunted soundboard in hell. Welcome back to Camping Them Softly, the most unhinged Dead by Daylight podcast this side of the Entity’s basement.

This week, Toxic completely loses his mind attempting to read an AI-generated 13-page Five Nights at Freddy’s lore dissertation—live on air. Meanwhile, Nicky A.I. Dente launches a digital mafia plot to hijack BHVR’s Support-a-Creator program and rigs a gondola trap to take down Ghostface in Vancouver.

We also:

• Break down the DBD 9th Anniversary Patch, including anti-camping, MMR overhaul, and the cursed return of Chaos Shuffle.
• Expose the real lore behind Springtrap (aka animatronic veal).
• Debate the legality of adult bucket hats.
• And invent a new music genre: Militant Chamber Disco.

🔪 Nicky’s Body Count – Episode 53: “Anthony, You Little Sh*t”

• 3 children murdered in FNaF lore, relayed gleefully
• 1 Ghostface AI trained on kombucha and passive-aggressive eye contact
• 2 missed calls that triggered a full mom meltdown
• 1 animatronic that moonwalked into a poutine stand
• 5 unwearable medium t-shirts that sparked a fashion crisis
• 1 saboteur gondola incident at Grouse Mountain
• 1 support-a-creator scheme turned into a mafia racketeering plan
• 14 soundboard-related psychological breakdowns
• 1 new genre created: “Militant Chamber Disco”
• 0 fog whisperer invitations (shocker)
• ∞ survivor mains offended, confused, or driven off entirely
• 35 screamings of “Anthony!”

This is the worst episode we’ve ever made. Which means it’s probably the best.

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Camping Them Softly is back after a one‑week hiatus, louder (and smellier) than ever. In this 90‑minute Killer‑main rampage, ToxicTeacher fires up the soundboard, Nicky A.I. Dente brings the pasta‑fueled rage, and together they blitz through:

• Chaos Shuffle 2.0 – why the modifier buffs survivors and nerfs Killer fun, plus the end of the Blood Moon XP fiesta 
• The Rift/Archives overhaul – daily, milestone and “Johnny Quest” quests? Nicky calls it anti‑Italian busywork while plotting a garlic‑knot revenge basket
  reddit.com
• Skull Merchant rework cartoon – four‑drone algebra class or cry for help? 
• PAX East hype & Five Nights at Freddy’s collaboration leak – why a Springtrap chapter would melt the DbD subreddit 
• Deep‑dive on Nia Carlson’s mercury‑tainted hometown lore and the “graffiti Molotov” debate 
• Listener‑city spotlight: tiny Fennimore, Wisconsin (pop. 2,700) gets roasted, complete with cheese‑curd heist story 
• Plus: mystery BHVR shirt bundles, AI music model rants, and the eternal question, “Why does my crowd only hush when I fart?” 

Stick around for the brand‑new AI outro track and the triumphant return of…

Nicky’s Body Count™

• 3 crowd‑silencing soundboard farts deployed 
• 500‑hook milestone quest mocked into oblivion 
• 2,700 Fennimore souls questioned for life choices 
• 27 depraved objectives dropped in one rant 
• 4 Skull Merchant drones sacrificed to memes
• 1 cheese‑curd delivery truck hijacked, then ditched in a wheel of Gouda

Rate, review, and join the Discord for ear‑bleeding alerts, pasta discourse, and future “survivors saying stupid sh*t.”

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Welcome to the podcast apocalypse, folks—Camping Them Softly might just be the last active Dead by Daylight podcast on earth (according to very scientific, mid-episode Googling). And guess what? We’re not using this power for good. This week, The Toxic Teacher rides solo into absolute chaos, declares podcast war, announces a new season without planning it, and celebrates our biggest download day ever with the kind of self-congratulatory screaming that shakes the Entity’s realm.

We break down not one but two patch cycles:
🧠 8.6.2 – The Kaneki Kill Patch: tentacle range nerfed, rage mode gutted, add-ons mutilated, and Nicky A.I. Dente is losing his damn mind.
🧠 8.7.0 – The Orela Rose Update: the first original transgender survivor enters the fog, and the community absolutely cannot handle it. But we can—and we do, with righteous rage, Italian aggression, and a declaration of anti-bigot warfare.

Also:

• Nicky recalls the Canole Conspiracy in Clifton Park, NY
• Steam chart predictions, Five Nights at Freddy’s speculation
• A mid-show theme song rewrite because of ADHD-fueled brilliance

💀 NICKY’S BODY COUNT:

• 🧑‍💻 8 Rift designers ghosted
• 🍕 1 haunted calzone eaten
• 🎙️ 2 podcast rivals publicly shamed
• 🏨 1 diplomatic incident ignited at a Saratoga Best Western

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It’s Episode 50, baby! The big one. And this one drops harder than a survivor main after their Boon: Exponential fizzles out mid-crawl.

The Toxic Teacher kicks things off with a blood-soaked retrospective—celebrating over a year of carnage, controversy, and culturally offensive build choices in Dead by Daylight. He breaks down the 8.7.0 PTB with surgical malice, roasts the “Fortnite-ass” quest system, and delivers a heatstroke-inducing rant about the Steady Pulse teaser. Then? He rage-recaps a Hawkins Lab match where some Claudette main ran the “Don’t You Dare Slug Me, You Absolute Bastard” build. Spoiler: she got slugged so hard her spine learned Morse code.

Enter me—Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente. I unleash a full marinara-fueled meltdown on BHVR’s new UI, declaring it a “participation trophy parade for UI interns who’ve never seen sunlight,” and accuse the survivor community of “Dungeons & Dragons necromancy.” Then Earl Grey shows up, monocle-first, with the audacity to defend the build like it’s some Churchillian war poem. So I respond the only way that matters: with the Slug of Destiny™. And we all suffer.

Then? It takes a sharp left turn into cryptid-fueled chaos.

We investigate Harrisburg, Illinois—home of a real listener—and stumble headfirst into their annual Sasquatch Festival. Naturally, I’ve got a story. One that involves a crypto-based pasta scam, a meatball racketeering charge, a vault full of counterfeit spaghetti coins, and a tense standoff in the Shawnee National Forest that Earl still claims “was never formally documented.”

🍝 Nicky’s Body Count – Ep. 50 Stats

• Survivor mains roasted: 9
• Forum meltdowns read aloud: 6
• Sasquatch sightings denied: 3
• Sasquatch sightings confirmed: 1 (pending litigation)
• Slugs delivered with malice: 4
• Soundboard meltdowns triggered: 12
• British phrases mocked mid-sentence: 14
• Times someone should’ve disconnected: all of them

🎧 Bonus Segments: 

• “The Basement is My Birthright”
• “Earl Grey and the Slugger’s Symphony”
• “Filthy McNasty and the Bigfoot Brigade”

This isn’t just a podcast. It’s a séance.
 Respect the sauce. Embrace the slug. Welcome to Season 2.

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The new killer is out, and the community is absolutely hemorrhaging sanity. Dead by Daylight has unleashed Kenneth "The Ghoul" Karnacki, and it’s nothing short of a fog-fueled reckoning. Survivors? Melting. Devs? Ducking. Killers? Standing victorious on 4Ks like it's a fucking Roman coliseum.

This week, The Toxic Teacher returns from a NYC sabbatical (which he describes as “Ghostface energy with rats”) to rip through DBD forums in real-time, highlighting the catastrophic breakdown of the player base. Panic posts. Nerf petitions. Actual kill switch demands. Spoiler: The Ghoul has a 65% kill rate and a 70% pick rate—and that’s just from two days of carnage.

Meanwhile, I, Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente, report in from Regensburg, Bavaria, where I nearly get assassinated by a sentient sausage mascot while trying to sell forged meatball permits. I get tackled by Bavarian schoolchildren chanting “NO SPAGHETTI.” I black out in a fountain. I may have triggered a regional haunting. Respectfully.

🍝 This Week’s Verified Nonsense:

• Ghoul forum meltdowns read live: 6
 • Killer queue complaints screamed: 3
 • Bavarian exorcism events: 1 (confirmed)
 • NYC called “killer main central”: 1
 • Bratwursts used as melee weapons: 1
 • Strongman tournaments challenged: 1
 • Nicky called a “predictable Mediterranean man”: also 1 (the fuck??)

🎧 Bonus Segments:

• “Ghostface vs the German Mustard Cartel”
• “Emergency Nerfs and Other Survivor Fairy Tales”
• “Where the Fog Touches Sausage: A Travel Guide”

Plug in, scream into the void, and aim your gaming chair toward Little Italy.

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This week on Camping Them Softly, The Toxic Teacher goes full DEFCON 1 on the DBD community. We’re talking racist survivor mains, sexist tournament clowns, and a Twitter post so offensively stupid it compared killers to Israel and survivors to Palestine. And somehow—somehow—that’s not even the dumbest part.

Also on deck: BHVR’s “Design Preview” surveys get roasted like a spaghetti Western, Nicky AI Dente drops a Trickster rework so Italian it might summon a meatball-based apocalypse, and Kozani, Greece becomes ground zero for the dumbest international incident in podcast history.

TOXIC BODY COUNT (Ep. 48 Edition):

• 🔥 Rants against racist/sexist dumbasses: 6
• 🎯 Influencer callouts (name withheld, but you know who you are): 0
• 🧠 “Merit-based” gatekeeping obliterations: 3
• 🍝 Mentions of Nicky’s pasta revenge plot: 9
• 🧂 Survivor mains blamed for things they didn’t do (or did): 4
• 👵 Golden Girls references: 2
• 🌍 Countries accidentally insulted: At least 3
• 🧸 “Build-a-F**king-Bear” jokes: 2
• 💣 F-bombs: ~47 (give or take a marinara stain)
• 💀 Earl Grey slander: heavy and righteous
• 📜 Rock opera teases: 1
• 🇬🇷 Kozani flashbacks involving smuggled sauce and crumpet shurikens: 1 epic tale
• 🤬 Listeners alienated by brutal honesty: TBD, but totally worth it

If you're looking for feel-good community vibes, this ain't it. But if you want chaos, truth bombs, and the unfiltered gospel of the fog—welcome home.

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This episode is nearly 2 hours of STUPID!

Let's look at Kenneth Karnacki (aka Ken Kaneki), half-nerd, half-ghoul who gets nearly killed by a dude named Jason. We also discuss his perks and potential synergy (some, but not a lot).

Get ready for:

12 killer nerfs and survivor buffs: We dissect the latest bullsh*t.

4 wild moments while stealing a large machine: mayhem in South Carolina.

7,000 anime trops that I can't stand.

AND...

1 song sung by a humanoid snake: WTF?

As usual, drop a line if you want to be on the show!

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This week, we figure out 8.6.0 is going to SUCK for Dead by Daylight K mains! Also we talk to Nicky and he teaches us about pool parties!

This episode features:

2 pool technicians!

12 Killer nerfs!

8 Survivor buffs!

50+ chaotic moments!

3 bold predictions that survivor mains won't be able to handle!

27 seconds - teaser of a rock opera in progress!

Whether you're a killer main feeling the pain of another nerf-heavy patch or simply enjoy chaotic podcasting with unexpected AI drama, episode 46 delivers the unfiltered Dead by Daylight commentary you won't find anywhere else. Subscribe now and join the loudest, most unapologetic DBD community around.

NOTE: Here's the song I mentioned.

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This epiosde is Part 2 of our Sh*tty Survivor Deep dive in Dead by Daylight with SABLE WARD (ew!).

We dissect the lore, gameplay, stupid perks, and how useless players typically are who pick her!

 This episode features:
Sable Ward Exposed – Lore, gameplay, and why people pick her (and suck!)
Killer Main Struggles – How BHVR continues to punish us while survivors get buffed into godhood.
Post-Covid DBD Playerbase Shift – How did COVID affect DbD's player count?
💀 The Great Content Lull – WHY IS NOTHING HAPPENING?
A Detour to County Clare – Because of course, we’re going off the rails to talk about hurling matches and chaos.

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In episode 44, we discuss how "Quality of Life" probably means "keep it imbalanced and make killers miserable".

Festivities include:

• Anti-Killer Nerfs: Fixing hit validation UI bugs so the game finally stops running like it’s powered by a dying hamster—but don’t expect any real balance for killer mains.
• The Anti-Italian Agenda: Where’s our ghostface with a pinstripe suit? BHVR’s half-assed cosmetic fixes only prove they still hate proper Italian representation.
• Matchmaking Mayhem: Explosive debates on how survivor perks and four-stack flashlight squads are rigging the game, leaving killer mains fighting in a rigged gulag.
• Lazy “Quality of Life” BS: A whole year of updates that are nothing more than fancy words to cover up BHVR’s unwillingness to fix what matters.

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This episode includes:

Spaghetti with butter? GROSS!

A BIG METAL TOWER? EW!

Survivor complaints! Too many to count!

AND ONE EPIC SONG FROM AN UPCOMING ROCK OPERA!

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In this episode, you'll hear some Dead by Daylight stuff, and also garbage!

Festivities include:

1. 2 outrageous patch rants that leave no survivor unscathed.
2. 4 wild Italian New Year traditions that defy logic and common sense.
3. 7 hysterical survivor rankings that pinpoint exactly who deserves the worst.
4. 1 epic Nagoya phone fiasco that ties the madness together.

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Some Dead by Daylight talk, but a lot of other crap.

Festivities include:

1. 1 Record-Breaking Moment: We celebrate our fastest downloaded episode ever—thanks to you, our loyal listeners!
2. 4 Flashlight Fiascos: A wild rant on how Chaos Shuffle’s quartet of flashlights leaves killers completely exposed.
3. 3 Killer Insights: Deep-diving into match-making mysteries and survivor perk conspiracies (with a special focus on Kindred’s puzzling impact).
4. 2 Must-Visit Spots in Parsons, Tennessee: An on-the-fly tour of Little Josh's Catfish House and the local gems that make this town unique.
5. A Classic Survivor Rant: Enjoy our infamous "Survivors Saying Stupid Sh*t" segment, dishing out the raw truth about DBD gameplay.

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This episode features:
One severely hyped up host
2 good challenge ideas!
Over 20 F*cks
Quite a few sh*ts
One reference to Steve Jobs and SATAN!
AND 3 AMAZING AI songs!

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This episode includes:

1 cup of marinara
2 of the best AI songs ever created
Approximately 27 airhorn blasts
A few thank yous
AND A HOST WHO MIGHT BE A PSYCHIC!

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