Becoming You Again – Détails, épisodes et analyse

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Becoming You Again

Karin Nelson

Éducation

Forme & Santé

Enfants & Parentalité

Fréquence : 1 épisode/6j. Total Éps: 286

Becoming You Again is the podcast for women who are going through divorce wanting help navigating grief, guilt, and the challenge of rediscovering who they are. Divorce Recovery Coach, Karin Nelson offers compassionate guidance, practical tools, and powerful mindset shifts to help you rebuild self-trust, reconnect with your intuition, and create emotional resilience. Each episode is a safe, supportive space that reminds you: divorce isn’t the end of your story; it’s the doorway to becoming the most authentic, confident version of yourself and creating the best of the rest of your life.

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Données mises à jour le 29/09/2026

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Burn The Haystack Dating Method: An Interview with Jennie Young

Épisode 287

lundi 28 septembre 2026 • Durée 57:34

You're ready to start dating after divorce. You join the dating apps, you start to read profiles and immediately feel lost. You start to question, is this normal? Is he for real? Maybe he's too good to be true? Or are they all like this? Then you start to question yourself instead. Maybe I'm being too picky. Maybe I'm the problem. Maybe I should give him a chance. Then you think, maybe I should just give up altogether...

For the final episode of my dating, love, and intimacy series, I'm joined by Dr. Jennie Young, professor of rhetoric, creator of the Burned Haystack Dating Method, and author of Burn the Haystack: Decode Dating, Torch the Duds, and Make Room for Men Who Matter. Jennie studies how people reveal what they believe through the words they choose, usually without realizing it. She has turned that into an online Facebook community of over 295,000 women.

If you're opening the dating apps for the first time since your divorce (or for the first time ever), this conversation is your field guide.

In this episode:

Why "burn the haystack" is the opposite of the "it's a numbers game" advice we've all been given
Why instant, electric chemistry may be your nervous system registering fear, not love
Why feeling nothing on a first date doesn't mean something's wrong
Block to burn, and why you should treat dating like a job search
Red-flag patterns to decode, including disciplinary directive (yes, even "let's grab coffee") and trad-wife code words
The profiles that look good if you're coming out of a hard marriage: "my kids come first," "looking for my peace," and "the final piece of the puzzle," and what they're really saying
How her method slows your intuition down enough that you can trust it
Green flags, and real hope for finding love later in life

To skip right to the interview go to 3:37 time code.

Connect with Jennie
Website: https://jennieyoung.com
Substack: https://burnedhaystack.substack.com (everything is free to read)
Instagram: @wordcasescenario
Facebook: search "Burned Haystack Dating Method" and join the largest group. That's the real one.
Get the book

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

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DISCLAIMER: THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR EDUCATIONAL, INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND ARE NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING PSYCHOLOGICAL, COUNSELING OR PROFESSIONAL HEALTHCARE ADVICE.

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You Are Allowed To Feel Good

Épisode 286

lundi 21 septembre 2026 • Durée 22:44

“Good in bed” sounds flattering until you notice what it’s really measuring. We’ve all heard it used like a performance review: skilled, enthusiastic, attentive and focused on someone else’s experience. But what do we call a woman who is obviously having a great time, who is fully enjoying her own body? The fact that we don’t even have easy words for that says a lot about how women’s pleasure has been treated, especially when you’re dating after divorce and trying to trust yourself again.

In this episode I dig into why wanting more can feel uncomfortable or even “wrong,” and how many of us learned to equate self-denial with being a good woman. I talk a little tiny bit of the science of female anatomy but more about the history of the science of the clitoris as this human body part was largely left unlabeled or omitted in major anatomy resources for decades, shaping what gets taught, studied, and prioritized. We also look at the orgasm gap and the research that points to scripts and habits, not “complicated bodies,” including what actually predicts orgasm for women.

Finally, we talk about receiving. If compliments, help, or attention feel like something you have to repay, that pattern shows up in intimacy too. I share a simple permission practice you can start this week plus journal questions to help you reconnect with desire in a grounded, shame-free way. If this hits home, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a review wherever you listen.

Citations:

Elise Loehnen, On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good (2023). https://www.eliseloehnen.com/blog/on-our-best-behavior

Orgasm gap — Frederick, D. A., St John, H. K., Garcia, J. R., & Lloyd, E. A. (2018). "Differences in Orgasm Frequency Among Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Heterosexual Men and Women in a U.S. National Sample." https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28213723/

O’Connell, H. E., Sanjeevan, K. V., & Hutson, J. M. (2005). "Anatomy of the Clitoris." Journal of Urology.

Sex and Intimacy After Divorce

Épisode 285

lundi 14 septembre 2026 • Durée 22:26

Nobody prepares you for the moment after divorce when dating turns into real physical intimacy and your body doesn’t know how to respond. The logistics get plenty of airtime, but the quiet fear of being touched again, not knowing what you like, or worrying you won’t feel anything at all can be just as intense. So we're talking about it in this episode.

I dig into why women so often treat sex as something they provide instead of something they get to want. That people-pleasing pattern shows up as self-abandonment: staying quiet, focusing on someone else’s experience, and making your own pleasure optional. I also share a piece of U.S. history that explains why consent inside marriage is a much newer cultural expectation than most of us realize, and how that legacy can shape the way intimacy feels even years later.

Then we move into the nervous-system side of post-divorce intimacy using the dual control model of sexual response, popularized by Emily Nagoski. Think accelerator and brake: desire rises when enough accelerators are on and enough brakes are off. After divorce, brakes like body image fears, stress, grief, finances, kids in the house, and distraction can keep you from feeling turned on even when you’re genuinely interested. I also talk about the myth of spontaneous desire, why “watching yourself” during sex shuts down sensation, and the questions that help you relearn what you like without treating intimacy like an audition.

You’ll leave with a simple somatic practice to help you reclaim body ownership, consent, and presence before you share your body with anyone else. If this resonates, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a rating or review so more women can find this support.

Listen to Ep 273: From Body Judgment to Body Neutrality: A Path Back to Yourself.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself?

Are You Ready To Date After Divorce

Épisode 284

lundi 7 septembre 2026 • Durée 25:18

Everyone has a timeline for when a woman should date after divorce and it somehow manages to be both too long and not long enough. I’m done with the rules, because the truth is other people don’t live in your body, they don’t know your history, and they can’t feel what your nervous system is doing when you imagine putting yourself back out there.

I'll talk about the history of where the rules of “waiting periods” come from, including the old-school roots of women being expected to publicly mourn and behave a certain way to stay socially acceptable. Those ideas never really disappeared, it just got rebranded as modern 'healing' advice. So if you’ve felt judged for dating “too soon” or “too late,” you’re not imagining that judgement but what's really going on is you're asking the wrong question.

Instead, I give you three real readiness signals for dating after divorce. First, a body-based check. Second, a pattern check so you can catch people-pleasing, self-abandonment, and validation seeking before they drive your choices. Third, a “why” check with journaling prompts that reveal whether you’re dating to escape pain or because you genuinely like your reasons and feel stable in yourself.

If you want a post-divorce dating plan that protects your boundaries, builds self-trust, and still leaves room for love, intimacy, and fun, hit play. Then subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review so more women can find the show.

Make sure to stick around for this dating series where I'm also covering sex and intimacy after divorce, permission to experience pleasure as a woman and to cap it off an interview with Jennie Young, author of Burn The Haystack dating method.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

Nervous System Grounding After Divorce

Épisode 283

lundi 31 août 2026 • Durée 06:05

Your mind might be ready to move on, but your body may still feel like it’s on high alert. We’re slowing down and doing something practical: a guided nervous system grounding exercise you can use anywhere, especially when divorce stress, co-parenting tension, or a sudden wave of anxiety pulls you out of yourself.

I walk you through a simple sequence that helps you orient to the present moment. This kind of somatic practice is small but powerful. When you stop spinning in the past and stop worrying about the future, you create space for emotional regulation, clearer thinking, and self-trust. If you’ve been trying to “figure it out” in your head and still don’t feel safe in your body, this is a gentle way back to now.

If you want deeper, lasting change, I also share how to work with me one-on-one. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a quick rating or review so more women can find these tools.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

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Calm Co-Parenting With A High-Conflict Ex

Épisode 282

lundi 24 août 2026 • Durée 23:42

In the last episode in The Ex-Files series I'm talking about what changes when you are co-parenting with a high-conflict ex where “communicate openly” and “be flexible” aren’t just unhelpful, they can actually set you up for more chaos. The goal becomes steadiness: keeping your nervous system regulated, keeping communication clean, and keeping your kids emotionally protected when they're with you.

I break down parallel parenting as a useful baseline and then go deeper with tools that work when the other parent is inflammatory or controlling, including the BIFF method to help you take your power back in this co-parenting relationship.

I'll then focus on the part that matters most: your children. Drawing on trauma-informed parenting insights and research on stress and brain development, you'll learn why transition days can feel so hard, why kids may act younger under chronic stress, and how to create an environment of safety through calm routines, predictability, and consistent one-on-one connection.

If you want calmer co-parenting communication, stronger boundaries, and a steadier home for your kids, press play. Then subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review so more divorced moms can find real help.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

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Emotional Detachment After Divorce 2.0

Épisode 281

lundi 17 août 2026 • Durée 23:05

Your ex doesn’t have to change for you to feel steady again. If a late pickup, a snippy text, or a comment in front of the kids emotionally hijacks your entire day, it can feel like he still has a remote control to your emotional life even years after divorce. I'm talking about how to take that remote back for good, without becoming numb, cold, or pretending to be “fine” all the time.

I redefine emotional detachment after divorce as a practice of keeping your side of the street clean: you manage your emotions and choices, and you stop trying to manage his. You’ll hear why negative emotions are not a problem, why detachment is not the same as letting things slide, and how you can care deeply about your kids and still stop needing your ex to show up a certain way for you to be okay. This is emotional freedom, not emotional shutdown.

Then we get practical with tools you can use in the exact moment you’re activated. We break down the difference between a nervous system response and a normal emotional reaction, why thought work won’t help when you’re in fight flight freeze, and how grounding or somatic regulation brings your prefrontal cortex back online. After that, we use a powerful coaching concept called “the manual” to spot the hidden shoulds and expectations fueling your suffering and to decide what to do next, including boundaries that protect you without trying to control him.

If you’re ready to stop spiraling, rebuild self-trust, and feel like yourself again after divorce, subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick review where you listen.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

Healing After Betrayal: When Trust Was Broken

Épisode 280

lundi 10 août 2026 • Durée 23:40

Betrayal during a marriage can make you question your own mind, your memories, and your ability to trust what’s right in front of you. If infidelity, lying, hiding, or a double life showed up in your marriage this episode can be your next step in your divorce healing journey.

This is the second episode in the Ex-Files where I'm talking about why betrayal pain feels so different from “normal” breakup grief, and why your brain may keep reaching into the past to re-check old moments for clues. I share the validation so many women need to hear: being deceived is not evidence you’re naive, broken, or unlovable. I explain concepts like betrayal trauma and betrayal blindness, and how intrusive thoughts, hypervigilance, and sleepless nights can be a documented nervous system response, not a personal failure.

From there, I get practical. I walk you through how to rebuild self-trust after betrayal by separating facts from the story your brain layers on top, grieving the reality you thought you were living in, and setting boundaries with rumination so you’re not trapped in the 2 a.m. timeline replay. You’ll also learn grounding tools you can use immediately and a simple approach to rebuilding confidence through small daily decisions that honor your intuition.

If you’re ready to stop outsourcing closure and start coming home to yourself, press play. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs it, and leave a quick rating or review so more women can find support when betrayal turns their world upside down.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

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The Ex-Files Ep 1: When Your Ex Moves On

Épisode 279

lundi 3 août 2026 • Durée 26:34

Your ex starts dating again and you're surprised by your reaction of finding yourself crying in the car, obsessing at night, or feeling that tight, panicky drop in your stomach. It can be so confusing especially when YOU DON'T EVEN WANT HIM BACK!

In this first episode of my Ex-Files series I'm talking about what’s actually happening in your brain and nervous system when your ex “moves on” and why you can feel things without it meaning that there must be something wrong with you. I talk about all the stories that we carry with us like, he moved on so he won, she replaced me, and the one that I suffered from - I’m behind.

You’ll leave with practical tools you can use any time you might be prone to have this kind of nervous system response including before drop-offs or family events, with social media, how to handle nosy questions, breaking up rumination and where to focus your attention moving forward.

Make sure to check back next week for the next episode in the Ex-Files series where I go deeper with healing after betrayal.

If this helped, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs steadiness, and leave a rating or review so more women can find this kind of post-divorce support.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

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Why You Didn't Leave Sooner Makes Sense

Épisode 278

lundi 27 juillet 2026 • Durée 22:19

“Why didn’t I leave sooner?” can feel like a realistic question but the most real thing about it is how full of shame and self judgement that question is. We turn hindsight into a weapon and put the past version of us on trial. I want to slow that moment down and offer a different path, one rooted in self-worth after divorce and real emotional resilience.

I'll talk you through what’s actually underneath that question, the fear of “What’s wrong with me?” and why that belief is both untrue and unhelpful. I share how I coach women to widen the lens and find the real reasons staying made sense. Those reasons are not character flaws. They’re information, and they can be the start of post-divorce healing instead of another loop of self-criticism.

Then we walk through the emotional stages that often come before leaving a marriage. I also offer a powerful reframe to practice right away so you can rebuild self-trust after divorce.

If you’re ready for less shame and more grounded forward motion, press play, share this with a friend who needs it, and subscribe. If it helps, please leave a rating and review so more women can find this support.

To download your FREE "Becoming You Again Podcast Map" click here.

To schedule your complimentary consult with Karin click here.

Struggling after divorce to get to know yourself? Click here to grab my $7 guide to get started!

If this podcast resonated with you in any way, please take a minute to follow and give me a rating wherever you listen to podcasts.

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