“We're not here to be martyrs, we’re not here to take care of others at our own expense. The more I respect myself, the more I  can support and give to others.” - Sara Campbell

Sara tries to find out what it takes to find contentment in any weather. Do we owe it to the world to be pleasant people, and if not can our bs be at least entertaining? Are we obligated to not inflict our negativity on others? Which coast has the better weather for aimless wandering? Is it the heat or is it the humidity?? Find out here!

“Shitsticks become dirty to clean us. If these are not Buddhas, what is?“ - Shundo Aoyama

After a messy month of his own, Dave gives us a Zen (and personal) look at conflict in practice, how it happens, whether it’s a problem, and how to work with it in meditation and maybe even with other people. Can we meditate arguments away? Is there a healthy way to incorporate difficult relationships into our lives? For the sake of cleaning up all of our messes effortlessly, should ACZC invest in one of those fancy Japanese toilets?? Find out here!

“Westerners like to conquer mountains. Easterners like to contemplate them. As for me, I like to taste them” - Santoka Taneda

Henry brings us a highly entertaining poetry hour as we follow the the lives and words of two Buddhist poets; Miyazawa Kenji trying to help the masses one annoyed farmer at a time, and Santoka Kenji picking himself up from a life of tragedy to drink himself into a sutra steeped stupor. What does it take to live a free life, an honest life, and/or a helpful life? Does the world want to be changed or be accepted as it is? Is just being your self ultimately being selfish? Find out here!

"This moment is not sacred. It's not mundane. It's weird. Find the weirdness." - Erik Andersen

Erik takes a loving look at the cold hard truth that this might be as good as it gets. Is the world a good place at heart? Or is it as inherently corrupt as it seems? Buddhism says both! So what should we believe? Is it better to challenge negative beliefs or celebrate them? Is there an outlook that can help make the world a better place, and is that the point? Find out here!

“Plant seeds in the sky and they’ll never grow. Plant them in dung and dirt and watch them flourish.” - Manjushri 

In the culminating thesis of the sutra, our great bodhisattvic heroes Vimalakirti and Manjushri celebrate the irascible and irreverent with a whole hearted endorsement of the path of the Wrong Way and the heavenly delights of hell while Mahakasyapa laments the great disappointment of his own enlightenment. Is this why we can’t have nice things? Would we actually be content if we did get all those nice things? Does being good ultimately do anyone any good?? Find out here!

“You don’t seek the way, the way seeks you!” - Kodo Sawaki

Sara shares with us the enlightening existential crisis of her wayward mind which, according to our forbears, is the essential mind of practice. How did we get here and why do we keep coming back? Why does this path turn out to be for some but not for others?? What’s the difference between going through the motions, and the embodiment of no mind?? Find out here!!

“We say, ‘Pulling out the weeds we give nourishment to the plant.’ We pull the weeds and bury them near the plant to give it nourishment. So even though you have some difficulty in your practice, even though you have some waves while you are sitting, those waves themselves will help you. So you should not be bothered by your mind. You should rather be grateful for the weeds, because eventually they will enrich your practice. “ - Shunryu Suzuki

A beginner who’s been been beginning for a long time takes a seasoned look the Beginner’s Mind with a series on the book that began it all - Shunryu Suzuki’s "Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind." This week! What is the Big Mind and how hard should we work to to find it? How much effort should we put to into our zazen, and how does effort even work in a goalless practice? How do we get to clarity of mind and what does such a thing even mean?? Find out here!

"Whatever the ineffable is, it doesn't seem too concerned with our politics. But then we're also always told that the ineffable is nothing but what happening right now...  So it gets left up to you to figure out what's truly important.

My actual hot take on everyone's politics is, if you've already sat down and shut up for a half hour today, whatever else you want to say is fine. And then I might even want to listen to you." - Dave Cuomo

Dave regales us with the story of that time Buddha juggled betrayal, assassination attempts, war, and intrigues of all kinds (nbd) in a look at how Buddhism does (and does not) deal with political engagement. Does ultimate reality care about the mundane affairs of our dusty little world? Do we have an obligation to take a stand on things that matter, or is sitting all that really matters?? Which speaks louder, the bellows of the Buddha or the thunderous roar of stillness?? Find out here!

“The nice thing about a Zen Center is they make it really easy to be a good person. Just follow the script - bowing, sitting, chanting enlightened things, sending all your cosmic merit to all living beings… you’re already being an enlightened buddha just by following the playbook. Everyone seems so nice, wholesome, and down to earth around here. I guess I don't really know what you're like on the outside. Maybe I don't wanna find out. But I like what this place does to us.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave regales us with the famously wise and whimsical Goddess chapter of the Vimalakirti Sutra. A sneaky snarky goddess has been hiding out listening in on our heroes, and now she’s ready to reveal herself and indulge in some no holds barred dharma combat. Can this proto feminist icon show our heroes the way? What do identity politics mean to a being born of no self? Can hatred be a tool of liberation?? Is it always attachment to want nice things? Or is the real attachment to push them away?? Find out here!

“If the pure land isn’t real, maybe we can make this a pure land. Even if it doesn't add up to anything, maybe our own brains can be a Buddha land - a sphere of influence positively affected by an outside Buddha. Maybe the pure land isn’t so far away after all.” - Erik Andersen

“Not knowing is nearest!” Erik takes us on a personal pilgrimage to the pure land as it exists right hear and now, with a survey of the practices, historicity, personal experience, and entangling relationship Pure Land Buddhism has to the Zen we all know and love. Do we need to believe in a practice for it to work? Is it Zen to do practices that make us feel better? Would it matter if it wasn’t?? Is it possible that the “place of precious things” is far closer than we ever could have imagined?? Find out here!

“Part of us dies in this process. It’s like a beautiful salad that starts to whither and you feel like something was lost… It’s like finding trust in the most unpromising place with no ground for solid footing. It's allowing the whole situation to penetrate through you and allowing yourselves to penetrate right through the situation…

But I'm still pondering. I don’t hundred percent agree with this dying process I experienced, although it’s always been a part of Soto Shu practice. So it remains not as an answer, but as a question.” - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei discusses the pickles and salads of practice, the bright vibrant greens and the withered wisdoms that develop over a lifetime of letting go. How do we maintain constancy in our practice and what happens if we do? What is the aspiration that drives us to dive head first into the murky waters of a realized life, sink or swim? What is left of our selves when our self lets go of us?? Find out here!

“Enlightenment might be inherent, but it’s not natural to humans for some reason. In some places they will literally beat it into or out of you. So my question is, what are we doing here? What do you want to get out of this?” - Dave Cuomo

Dave takes a look at a modern Zen conundrum: is a Zen center a place of equal practice and training for all, or is it a service job with necessary hierarchies and distinctions? Is our current model of importing traditional monastic practice really applicable to the busy lay practitioner of today? Is it possible to share the dharma to everyone without watering it down?? Find out here!

“It was always about what am I contributing? What am I doing out in the world? But yeah, I’m not shooting so high anymore. It’s true, there are important things to be done out there. And the reality is this practice is going to be really important to the future. So yeah, sitting is my contribution.” - Mota Mynttinen

Mota open up and regales us with the story of what he’s doing and why he’s here in a raw and revealing account of the traumatic injury that threatened to derail the life he thought he was living. Can sitting up help bring some balance to the world when it goes bottoms up? Is it possible to overcome our addiction to ambition as the meaning of our lives? Can sitting help bridge the gap between being and doing? Find out here!

“We are the lonely all together. All together, we’re all alone.” - John Prine

Dave indulges us in a little story time while also indulging in some explananing of how koans work with a classic tale of dharma drama, jealous rivalries, and onomatopoetic poetry. What should we ask in practice discussion when we don’t know what to say? Can we find a safe place for our passions instead of practicing them away? Does every living creature really die alone, and wait… isn’t that something we all share?? Find out here!

“If you train yourself to always be confident, competent, and charismatic, you're going to walk into a room and either alienate or inspire everybody, and connect with nobody.

If you’re able to walk into a room with a tickle of anxiety and self doubt, next to some hope and aspiration, all cradled in the big old thromb of emptiness that animates everything, then you can actually connect with people. Maybe.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave regales us with the wild and wacky wizardly hijinks of Chapter 6 of the Vimalakirti Sutra. This week the assembly needs to find itself some chairs, so Vimalakrit busts out his portal gun to go looking for the Greatest Chairs in the Universe, which turn out to be 84,000 feet tall! Can the lesser monks among us measure up to the seats of the great bodhisattvas (metaphor alert…)? And how are we to understand the bodhisattva’s great magic known as “Beyond Comprehension” (irony alert…)? And if, as the sutra says, every jerk in the universe is actually just a bodhisattva in disguise trying to test and train us, what is the actual answer to the test?? Find out here!

“…when you’re totally beaten up and you don’t know what to do, that’s the moment of truth - when suddenly all those Buddhist teachings you’ve read about are no longer just something you read in a book….” - Gyokei Yokoyama

On day two of our Mt Baldy retreat, Gyokei opens himself up for Daisan - a revelatory round of public practice discussion where he fields all of the sangha’s burning questions such as: How do we find meaning in our worldly work? How is North American Zen developing differently from its Japanese roots? How do we raise kids as Zennies without them growing up to hate us and Zen in the process? And can we get Gyokei to spill the beans on his own spiritual awakening? Find out here!

“Bodhisattva’s determination is not something that makes you feel leashed or confined. This kind of determination frees you…. It's not self-sacrifice. It's the feeling that I cannot help but do this.” - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei returns from a nationwide tour of the post-pandemic Zen Center scene with an impassioned (and important) message of unity and diversity for all the far flung sanghas of right here and now - from the pure diligent practice of Dogen, to the welcoming warmth of Keizan, and all the many myths, characters, and bodhisattva spirits in between. What do old world and new world Zen have to learn from each other (literally everything...)? What is the hairsbreadth of difference between free giving and self sacrifice (universes!)?? And are we really just here to make friends (absolutely!!)??? Find out here!

“There’s a thousand ways of speaking, infinite understandings, all just inviting you to befriend your unknowing.” - Shitou Xiqian

Dave brings us a fresh original translation of Shitou’s timeless, “Straw Hut Song” - a beautiful and deceptively simple piece that moves from a humble nap in the hay to the boundless fringes of everywhere and nowhere at the drop of a line. Why can’t Shitou just live and love like normal people, and for better or for worse, why is it so easy for us to relate? Is his ancient wisdom something he can teach us, or something we already know? As translators, can we be faithful to our forbears as we dust off their lines, and still make their songs sing?? Find out here.

”…it was like, ooh, I don't have to count breaths? I liked that idea… no anchor, nothing holding me to this cushion… where was I going to go? It was scary, but liberating. I thought, ‘Hmm… maybe I shouldn't tell anybody that I'm doing this… But I can do this. This is something I could do every day.’” - John Nilsson

John shares the raw unvarnished story of what he’s doing and why he’s here, from growing up in the triumphal certainty of the Mormon Church, to a kindly German Buddha compassionately bursting that bubble with the liberating chaos of uncertainty. What do we do when no one is telling us what to do? Is Zen a suitable religion for the irreligious? And just how much meditation does it take to master levitation?? Find out here!

“The goal here isn't to stop feeling pain. We need you to feel pain." - Dave Cuomo

In pt 4 of our Vimalakirti series , the great bodhisattva Manjusrhi finally meets the enlightened laymen Vimalakirti himself for some playfully profound dharma combat as they tackle the big questions; why do we have trouble? How should we care for other people when they have trouble?? How should we care for ourselves when we have trouble??Can we really rid ourselves of all pain, and if so, should we??? Let’s find out.

“We all think that we're a good person, that we're some form of intelligent. In the monastery, they compassionately take that away and help us remember that there is something more important.” - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei takes us on a personal tour of zazen from the monastic perspective; from the enlightenment of certain failure, to the raw self underneath we may or may not be ready to meet. How is zazen supposed to wake us up when it’s always putting us to sleep? Is it possible to be ambitious in practice without being goal driven? Do we really need rough rude awakenings to drop off the self or is there a kindler gentler way? Find out here!

“Part of grief is that you can't predict it. It just happens and you have no control over it. And some of that aspect of grief is accepting that you don't have control; or maybe not accepting, actually resisting it entirely and rebelling against it, and being afraid that you don't have control over your loved ones disappearing and going. And maybe getting over it is accepting impermanence, accepting that ‘however you imagine it, it always turns out other than that.’” - Emily Eslami

In true Bodhisattva fashion, Emily shares a recent loss and takes the opportunity for a heartfelt look into Buddhist teachings on grief. Can a practice of non attachment offer any solace for the attachments we don’t want to let go of? Are the enlightened masters of old too enlightened to offer anything more than the cold comfort of dispassion? Is there good in grief? Let’s discuss.

“If anything you say is going to be wrong, you might as well say it right” - Colin Young

Dave takes a Zen look at making choices - what are wise discernments and what is the delusion of discrimination? Along the way we get a dramatic reading of the Xinxin Ming, Sengcan’s classic treatise on choice and non duality, and some practical advice on how to deal with the annoying DJ in the apartment upstairs. 

“A professional artist is someone who understands what they're doing and are just going to do what they understand.  An amateur is going into something with the understanding you're going to get lost.” - Jason Dodge

Jason takes us on a delightful walk through the life and work of Ryokan, the famous wandering poet monk of Edo Japan, while holding up Ryokan’s poetry as a mirror to reflect on how Zen has informed his own work as a professional artist, and how practice can both fuel and confound the work of any creative. Along the way we get practical advice for the Zen artist in all of us, poetry battles between brothers, trippy verses written on skulls, and what happens when a lover leaves Ryokan’s best texts on read. 

“I've seen too much, man. I know what's out there. And it's not all bad. And it's also not all good.” - Sara Campbell

Sara revels in the nightmare of a beautiful spring evening, the fragility of the daffodils, the darkness of the rain, and the five powers that can turn that nightmare into a perfectly present dream. How do we remember to notice the cool breeze of a deep blue twilight when all we feel is dark? Can we include fear and pessimism in our all inclusiveness, or are they the absence of all inclusiveness? And will anyone remember to bring light and laughter to the bodhisattva of light and laughter? Find out here!

“If you can sit zazen until you don't need to get up in the middle, then you're really content with nothing. When you're content with nothing, you don’t need to go out and find things to fill that big empty hole inside of you. The less you need, the less you have to worry about. I highly recommend it.” - Dave Cuomo

In the thrilling conclusion to his Yogacara series, Dave wraps it all up with some epic poetry from Vasubandhu and a brief overview of how exactly all this theory helps, what exactly it helps us do, and why none of that is the point since all of it was just an illusion anyway. Why do Zennies take themselves so seriously when everything is ultimately imaginary? How is being depressed the cure for depression? And what is the fundamental essence of text anxiety?? Find out here!

“You might think you're no good or you can't do anything. But the more you think that, the more you might be missing that little hairsbreadth of difference that could be the difference between heaven and earth. 

Anything can happen at any time. 

The message is to not believe anything. To just be cautious. And to take everything with a grain of salt.” - Erik Andersen

Erik brings us the story of one little phrase that can make all the difference in the universe - Fayan’s “A hairsbreadth of difference between heaven and earth.” One thought, one word, one moment, how can we change the world in the space of a hair? How can we ever truly meet someone if the space between us is world’s away? Find out here!

“Ultimately, you can't separate yourself from the things that you or others do wrong. There's no glory in being better than other people.” - Dave Cuomo

In pt 3 of his thrilling Vimalakirti Sutra series, Dave regales us with the story of the time our titular hero, the enlightened layman Vimalakirti, sought out each of Buddha’s best monks to explain to them exactly how they’re doing it all wrong. What does true quiet sitting look like? How do we attain Nirvana without turning our back on desire? What’s the difference between evil and tragedy? And does being good ultimately do anyone any good? Find out here!

“They say there is only suffering. Even happiness is just another form of suffering. And I can see that. But what do you do with that knowledge? Do you still go to birthday parties? Do you go on dates? And what do you say? Do you just say ultimately happiness and unhappiness are just the head and tail of the same snake? I don’t know if there’s a quick and easy solution I can give to that. And if you have one, please hit me up.” - Leon Sandler

ACZC’s own Leon Sandler takes the hot seat to tell us the story of what he’s doing and why he’s here. From Denver to Istanbul, spanning continents and lifetimes, Leon spins us a story of the great open question: what does it mean to live a normal life in a practice that deconstructs any such notion into the ridiculousness of oblivion? Find out here!

"Precepts are what humbles us. It's not designed to inflate our imagination. It sobers us. The precepts come with an understanding that we are constantly, in each moment, failing. And that's why we uphold the precepts." - Gyokei Yokoyama

Gyokei returns to the hot seat with an in depth and personal look at precepts and Jukai (lay precept ceremony). From the historical and cultural roots, to his own experiences growing up Zen in all its childhood innocence and angry adolescence, this is a story of making friends with your shadow side and tripping over the truth until you finally fall face first into it.

“If we started with the goal of becoming happy and wise enough to attract better people into our lives and making a better world together, now they’re telling us the real liberation is to not need to think like that at all -  to be so free that you’re not worried about what kind of world you live in. In fact if you were truly free, you might just choose to go for the most troublesome people in the lowest places, because your real joy and calling is to be where you’re needed the most.” - Dave Cuomo

In our latest installment of Zen Story Time, Dave brings us part 2 of the Vimalakirti Sutra. Here we meet our eponymous hero, Vimalakirti, the enlightened laymen who spends his days at the gambling halls and his nights at the bars and brothels - a bodhisattva so free of attachments that he has no qualms spending his life immersed in them (only for the good of all beings of course…). Will he be able to bring the light of wisdom to the darkest corners of the world? Find out here!

"The funny thing about zazen is, it can’t be fooled. The funny thing about Zen is I can’t crush it or not crush it. So all I really want to do is be honest and convey something true for a second. And when I remember that, I kinda can" - Jordan Mylet

Jordan regales us with a warm and insightful love letter to zazen, as part of our series where long time sangha members (like you!) tell us the story of what they are doing and why they are here. What happens when all you want is to enjoy a nice day at the park, and next thing you know you're on a years long quest to unravel the great mysteries of who and what we are just to be able notice a nice moment sitting under the trees? How do we make peace with the world that's rattling around inside our own heads? Is it possible to become a better shiner you without digging ourselves deeper into the great pits of desire?? Find out here!

“When we’re talking about joy, I mean the kind of joy that you might feel at a funeral, a crying aching joy that encompasses everything. It's like, no, this whole thing is beautiful and I'm glad we did this. And I would do it all over again.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave brings us an optimistic look at the afflictions - greed, hatred, delusion, anger, guile (a personal favorite), arrogance, laziness, and all the rest. How do me make allies out of our restless shadow sides and finally have a chance at whatever they mean by “free will”? How can we learn to read a room by taking a good hard look in the mirrors of our own minds? And if we really want to be our best selves, should we be going to therapy or doing zazen? (Spoiler alert: the answer is yes!) Find out here!

"To that voice who's saying, ‘Are we good enough?’ This is saying we exist. And that's enough" - Emily Eslami

Emily shares with us Dogen's bright and clear treatise on fundamental self worth, "Brightness." What does Zen mean with woo woo sounding words like 'Buddha's light?' and how is that supposed to apply to us? And where does the light go when everything looks dark?? Find out here!

“The most important thing you can be doing is just to be doing it, and that's doing it right. You don't have to be perfect. You just have to be there.” - Sara Campbell

Sara shares her experiences with Master Clown (yes, that’s a thing!) Moshe Cohen’s “Levity of Pause” workshop, all about the intersection of Zen and clown. Join us as she helps us bring a little humor to our stodgy old zazen and, if we're lucky, maybe poke a few holes in the ridiculousness of the absurd certainties we call life.

“When the problem is a part of you, there is no problem, because you are the problem itself.” - Shunryu Suzuki

Emily brings us a meditation on problems, problem solving, and all the machinations, rationalizations, and somersaults we do to try to prove that our problems are somewhere outside of ourselves, and then what happens when we start to point that finger right back where it came from. When is the problem actually other people? Have we earned that sense of superiority we get from meditating while our partners are sleeping in? Are our thoughts pulling us away from ourselves, and is that even possible?? Find out here!

“Slowly, over time, you might get used to not feeling crappy about yourself. You might get used to not hating everyone you disagree with. And then when some of that old negativity does come back up it can seem like a big problem. But that’s a good sign. Don’t turn back when you notice how crappy of a person you can be. When the afflictions become a noticeable anomaly, that’s great because it just means you’ve established a new normal.” - Dave Cuomo

In an in depth and personal look at one of Yoagacara’s infamously nerdy lists, Dave brings us a talk of sweet cringey goodness and all the things we love to hate, aka The Beneficial Factors. How do we convince a cynical mind to open up and see the light (patiently…)? And what is happiness really (pure empty space!)? Find out here!

“You are what's happening, what's happening is you. What else could you be? Even when what's happening is that you're doubting what's happening, that's still what's happening.” - Dave Cuomo

In a totally timely New Year’s talk, Dave brings us a dramatic reading of “The Time Being,” Dogen’s classic treatise on time and reality and where exactly we fit into all that. What is time (us!)? What does it mean (everything!)?? And what are we supposed to do with it in practice (keep doing that...)??? Also, bonus! Special sangha and center announcements toward the end of the talk.

"What are we liberating ourselves from? It's about being able to do the things that you want to do and not getting hung up about smaller things

This is emotional liberation, emotional freedom. People get discouraged in Zen for not getting things or not understanding it. A lot of people think that they just don't get it and move on to other things.

You have to be okay with sometimes not getting it. That’s a good thing here." - Erik Andersen

In an embodiment of true Zen wisdom, Erik regales us with a koan that he can’t answer, and answers it with a talk on how to answer the unanswerable. Is the world a place of good or a place of evil? Does the joy outweigh the suffering? Is there an answer to such a question, and how are we supposed to respond if there isn’t? Find out here!

“Every religion at some point asks the question, ‘Why do bad things happen to good people?’ And there is rarely a satisfying answer. But this sutra is going to try to answer that by showing us how to accept the full crappiness of the world, while also knowing it as a jewel encrusted paradise at the same time.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave dives into some sangha story time with The Vimalakirti Sutra in part 1 of a new chapter by chapter series on this most entertaining of Sutras. In pt 1 we take a hard honest look at two questions; how did Buddha turn the world into an enlightened paradise, and how can Buddha call this messed up world an enlightened paradise? What do we do with toxic relationships and why do we find them so entertaining? Are we ultimately at fault for all the crap in the world? And who do we ultimately get to blame for everything? Find out here!

"Last night, this mountain monk unintentionally stepped on a dried turd and it jumped up and covered heaven and earth. This mountain monk unintentionally stepped on it again, and it introduced itself, saying, “My name is Sakyamuni.” Then, this mountain monk unintentionally stepped on his chest, and immediately he went and sat on the vajra seat, saw the morning star, bit through the traps and snares of conditioned birth, and cast away his old nest from the past." Eihei Dogen

In a special Rohatsu evening talk, Dave celebrates with a little story time, bringing us accounts of Buddha’s enlightenment from the mystical, to the stary eyed, to the time Dogen stepped on a turd named Sakyamuni Buddha and all was revealed. Why does Buddha think his enlightenment included us, and why should his nice little moment still matter to us now?  Find out here!

“To live in the realm of Buddha nature means to die as a small being, moment after moment. When we lose our balance we die, but at the same time we also develop ourselves, we grow. Whatever we see is changing, losing its balance. The reason everything looks beautiful is because it is out of balance, but its background is always in perfect harmony.” - Shunryu Suzuki

Kill your idols! Kill the Buddha. In a timely and highly inspiring talk, Emily takes on the case of the late great master Linji’s advice to “Kill the Buddha, kill the patriarchs, kill your parents and attain liberation!” It’s the great Zen-Punk exhortation to let go of everything you know about what we’re doing and who we’re doing it for. Who can we have faith in when there is no self and no one outside the self? Who are we ultimately doing any of this for?? Find out here!

“This is the answer key to zazen, the answer key to Buddhism. It’s actually the answer key to enlightenment too. It might not seem like it, it might seem pretty boring. But, when they don't tell you the answers in Zen, this is what they’re not saying.“ - Dave Cuomo

Dave walks us through Yogacara’s “Five Omnipresent Factors” - the theoretical underpinning to all of Zen’s deceptively simple instructions for “just sitting,” and just maybe, to reality itself. When we stop worrying about our thoughts and “just pay attention,” what do we end up seeing with all that attention? How do our selves and reality construct themselves at every given moment? Also, bonus round! Should we let our mosquito friends bite us in zazen? And can we do Zen for simple self improvement without accidentally stripping away the illusion of reality as we know it? Find out here!

"I love the idea of worlds creating and worlds destroying. Each moment being new makes the good times sweeter. And being aware of how much you love something when it's happening makes harder times bearable. It's that awareness that everything is being made up and torn down constantly." - Sara Campbell

Live from Mt Baldy, Sara brings us a personal exploration of this year's retreat theme, "World's Created, World's Destroyed," including everyone's favorite koan on the end of the world and what to do about it, plus a lovely reading from Charlotte Joko Beck on the great coal furnace of zazen.

"When I stopped being scared of other people, a funny thing happened. I realized I like people.

You were like these static things that knew right from wrong and could judge me, and then one day you stopped being that. I realized that you don't know who you are or what you’re supposed to be doing either, and that meant I don't have to know what I am or what I’m supposed to be doing. And now we can all just hang out. It's a way different relationship, a funny relationship, and I like it a whole lot better."

Recorded live from Mt Baldy, Dave Cuomo reads Dogen’s “Space!” and talks emptiness, anxiety, and boundless love, while the sangha debates the best and worst poems to bum out a wedding. 

“The freedom we talk about is that wherever we are, we are in some kind of structure.  Some are more restrictive, some are more free...

What I picked up through this monastic life was the freedom from your own preconceptions and notions - the end of enslavement by our own mind, to be free wherever you are.” - Gyokei Yokoyama

Join us as special guest Gyokei Yokoyama of Sozenji temple brings us a highly personal and insightful window into growing up in traditional Japanese Zen Buddhism and monastic training in the rough and tumble world of Eheiji Temple (yes, that Eiheiji!). What do Japanese Zennies really think of us hair brained Westerners taking up the practice? And what is gained and lost in the sometimes harsh realities of institutional Zen? And do we need such harsh lessons to get the fundamental point? (And what is the fundamental point???) Find out here!

“It’s not an attainment, it’s a lament.” - Dave Cuomo

Dave tries to figure out his purpose and articulate what meaning in Zen is while trying to give a talk in a park with threatening geese and impending rain on a retreat not going entirely to plan. What are the stages of meaning making and how do we rate? Is Dave’s level as off the charts as he claims? And what are the secret criteria for trustworthy lay leaders and Zen teachers?? Find out here!

"If I say my boss over there is underpaying me because they're a jerk and that's not my fault, then I'm not really being with that situation. If I see myself as much a part of this situation as they are, then that's where actual joy happens. That's what I would call love.

I love my crappy bosses for the fact that we shared the same circumstances that conditioned me to resent them and them to find it pleasing to underpay me, and that it's not either of our fault that eons ago the earth came together in a big shattering of star bursts, and now here we are fighting over resources because we're both made of DNA. How can I blame us for being born on a planet like that?

So all we're really saying here is, yup, I live here too, and I love you, because we're in this together." - Dave Cuomo

Dave takes a good hard look at a classic tough love treatise by our great grumpy founder of Zen himself, Bodhidharma. Does "suffering injustice" really mean we're supposed to take crap and like it? Can "seeking nothing" actually help us find joy?? Find out here!

“It's not about the chanting. It's not about what we're saying. It's about the community. It's about listening to each other.” - Leslie Mundy

In a very sweet and insightful story hour, our own Leslie Mundy takes the hot seat to regale us with the tale of what she’s doing and why she’s here. From mind altering days in the ‘60s, to the wild world of koan interviews, to our own ACZC Zoomdo, Leslie spins us stories within stories of learning how to sit still in a world that never seems able to for all that long.

“We didn’t evolve to see reality, we evolved to survive. If we had evolved to see reality we would probably just appear as timeless bits of quantum foam. But that wouldn’t be very helpful for trying to feed yourself or make babies…" - Dave Cuomo

In the latest installment of his Yogacara series, Dave takes on the double headed monster, the double edged sword, of Manas - the self consciousness. According to DT Suzuki, It’s the thing that keeps us captive, and the only thing that can set us free. Buddhism says we have no self. Our senses tell us otherwise. Why? What is that self, how did it get there, and do we need it? What’s the difference between healthy self conception and the hindrance of self conceit? And can we ever get to know the sweet taste of fresh air if we’re stuck driving around seeing the world through the gauges of a submarine? Find out here!